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43 - Autobiography of Madame Guyon by Jeanne Marie Bouvier de la Motte Guyon · Autobiography of Madame Guyon

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  Speaker 1: The Autobiography of Madame Killon by Jean Kion, Volume two,
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  Speaker 1: chapter thirteen. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings
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  Speaker 1: are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer,
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  Speaker 1: please visit LibriVox dot org. Then went off from the Ursulines.
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  Speaker 1: They sought a house for me at a distance from
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  Speaker 1: the lake that there was but one to be found empty,
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  Speaker 1: which had the look of the greatest poverty. I had
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  Speaker 1: no chimney, but in the kitchen, through which one was
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  Speaker 1: obliged to pass. I took my daughter with me and
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  Speaker 1: gave up the largest room for her and the maid
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  Speaker 1: who was to take care of her. I was lodged
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  Speaker 1: in a little hall on strow, to which I went
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  Speaker 1: up by Latin. As we had no other furniture, but
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  Speaker 1: our beds quite plain and homely. I sought some strowers,
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  Speaker 1: some Dutch earthen and good, and were Never did I
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  Speaker 1: enjoy a greater contempt than in this little hall, which
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  Speaker 1: appeared so very conformable to the state of Jesus Christ.
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  Speaker 1: I fancied everything better on good than on plate. I
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  Speaker 1: laid in all my provisions, hoping to stay there a
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  Speaker 1: long time, But the devil did not leave me long
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  Speaker 1: in such sweet peace. It would be difficult for me
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  Speaker 1: to tell the persecutions which were steered up against me.
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  Speaker 1: They threw stones in at my windows, which fell at
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  Speaker 1: my feet. I had put my little garden in order.
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  Speaker 1: They came in the night, tore it all up, broke
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  Speaker 1: down the arbor, and overturned everything in it, as if
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  Speaker 1: it had been ravaged by soldiers. They came to abuse
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  Speaker 1: me at the door all night long, making such a
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  Speaker 1: racket as if they were going to break it open.
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  Speaker 1: These persons have since told who the person was that
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  Speaker 1: put them on such work. Though from time to time
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  Speaker 1: I continue my charities at Gheks, I was not the
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  Speaker 1: less persecuted for it. They offered one person a warrant
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  Speaker 1: to compel Father la Combe to stay at Tunon, thinking
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  Speaker 1: he would otherwise be a support to me in the persecution.
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  Speaker 1: But we invented. I knew not then the designs of God,
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  Speaker 1: and that you would soon draw me from that poor,
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  Speaker 1: solitary place in which I enjoyed a sweet and solid satisfaction.
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  Speaker 1: Notwithstanding the abuse, I thought myself happier here than any
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  Speaker 1: suffering on earth. It was for me like a nest
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  Speaker 1: and a place of repose, and Christ was willing that
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  Speaker 1: I should be like him. The Devil, as I have said,
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  Speaker 1: irritated my persecutors. They sent to desire me to go
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  Speaker 1: out of the diocese. All the good which the Lord
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  Speaker 1: had caused me to do in it was condemned more
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  Speaker 1: than the greatest crimes. Crimes they tolerated, but me they
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  Speaker 1: could not endure. All the while, I never had any
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  Speaker 1: uneasiness or repentance for my having left all, not that
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  Speaker 1: I was assured of having done the will of God therein.
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  Speaker 1: Such an assurance would have been too much for me.
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  Speaker 1: But I could neither see nor regard anything, receiving everything
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  Speaker 1: alike from the haunt of God, who directed and disposed
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  Speaker 1: of these crosses for me, either in justice or in mercy.
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  Speaker 1: The Marchioness of Prunai, sister of the Chief Secretary of
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  Speaker 1: State to his Royal Highness, the Duke of Savoy and
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  Speaker 1: his Prime Minister, had sent an express from Turin in
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  Speaker 1: the time of my illness to invite me to come
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  Speaker 1: to side with her, and to let me know that,
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  Speaker 1: being so persecuted as I was in this diocese, I
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  Speaker 1: should find an asylum with her. That during that time
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  Speaker 1: things might grow better, that when they should be well disposed,
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  Speaker 1: she would return with me and join me with a
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  Speaker 1: friend of mine from Paris, who was willing also to
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  Speaker 1: come to labor there according to the will of God.
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  Speaker 1: I was not at that time in a condition to
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  Speaker 1: execute what she desired, and expected to continue with the
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  Speaker 1: eursolence till things should change. She then wrote to me
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  Speaker 1: about it no more. This lady is one of extraordinary piety,
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  Speaker 1: who had quitted the splendor and noise of the court
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  Speaker 1: for the more silent satisfaction of a retired life, and
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  Speaker 1: to give herself up to God with an eminent share
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  Speaker 1: of natural advantages. She has continued a window twenty two years,
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  Speaker 1: has refused every offer of marriage, to consecrate herself to
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  Speaker 1: our Lord entirely and without any reserve. When she knew
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  Speaker 1: that I had been obliged to leave the Ursulins, yet
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  Speaker 1: without knowing anything of the manner in which I had
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  Speaker 1: been treated, she procured a letter to oblige Father la
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  Speaker 1: Combe to go to pass some weeks at Turin for
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  Speaker 1: her own benefit, and to bring me with him thither,
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  Speaker 1: where I should find a refuge. All this she did,
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  Speaker 1: unknown to us as she has told us, since superior
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  Speaker 1: force moved her to do it without knowing the codes.
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  Speaker 1: If she had been deliberately reflected on it, being such
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  Speaker 1: a prudent lady, she probably would not have done it,
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  Speaker 1: because the persecutions which the Bishop of Geneva procured us
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  Speaker 1: in that place cost her more than a little of humiliations.
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  Speaker 1: Our Lord permitted him to pursue me after a surprising manner,
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  Speaker 1: into all the places I have been in, without giving
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  Speaker 1: me any relaxation. I never did him any harm, but
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  Speaker 1: on the contrary, would have let down my life for
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  Speaker 1: the good of his diocese. All this fell out without
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  Speaker 1: any design on our part. We, without hesitation, believed it
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  Speaker 1: was the will of God, and thought it might be
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  Speaker 1: the means of His appointment to draw us out of
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  Speaker 1: the reproach and persecution we labor under, seeing myself chased
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  Speaker 1: on the one side, desire on the other, It was
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  Speaker 1: concluded that Father la Combe should conduct me to Turin,
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  Speaker 1: and that he should go from thence to Brazil. Beside him,
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  Speaker 1: I took with me a religious man of merit, who
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  Speaker 1: had taught theology for fourteen years past, to take away
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  Speaker 1: from our enemies. All caught for slender. I also took
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  Speaker 1: with me a boy whom I had brought out of France.
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  Speaker 1: They took horses, and I hired a carriage for my daughter,
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  Speaker 1: my chambermaid, and myself. But all persecutions are useless when
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  Speaker 1: it pleases God to permit them to be frustrated. Our
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  Speaker 1: adversaries immediately rode to Paris. A hundred ridiculous stories were
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  Speaker 1: circulated about this journey. Committees were acted on it, things
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  Speaker 1: invented at pleasure, and as false as anything in the
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  Speaker 1: world could be. It was my brother father la Mande,
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  Speaker 1: who was so active in uttering all this stuff. Had
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  Speaker 1: he believed to be true, he owed, out of charity
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  Speaker 1: to have concealed much more, being so very false. They
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  Speaker 1: said that I was gone all alone with Father la Combe,
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  Speaker 1: strolling about the country from province to province, with many
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  Speaker 1: such fables, as weak and weak as they were, incoherent
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  Speaker 1: and badly put together. We suffered all with patience, without
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  Speaker 1: vindicating ourselves or making any complaint. Scarcely were we arrived
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  Speaker 1: at Turin, But the Bishop of Geneva wrote against us,
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  Speaker 1: as she could persue us no other way, he did
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  Speaker 1: it by letters. Father la Combe repaired to Brazil, and
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  Speaker 1: I stayed at Turin with the Marchioness of Brunei. But
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  Speaker 1: what crosses was I assaulted with in my own family,
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  Speaker 1: from the Bishop of Geneva, from the Barnapiites, and from
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  Speaker 1: a vast number of persons besides my eldest son came
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  Speaker 1: to find me on the death of my mother in law,
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  Speaker 1: which was an accommendation of my troubles. After we had
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  Speaker 1: heard all his accounts of things, and how they had
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  Speaker 1: made sales of all the movables, chosen guardians, and settled
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  Speaker 1: every article without consulting me, I seemed to be there
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  Speaker 1: entirely useless. It was judged not proper for me to return,
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  Speaker 1: considering the rigor of the season. The Marchioness of Brunei,
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  Speaker 1: who had been so warmly desirous of my company, seeing
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  Speaker 1: my great crosses and reproaches, looked coldly upon me, my
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  Speaker 1: childlike simplicity, which was the state wherein God at that
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  Speaker 1: time kept me passed with her for stupidity. For when
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  Speaker 1: the question was to help anyone or about anything which
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  Speaker 1: God required of me, he gave me with the wis
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  Speaker 1: weakness of a child, the evident talkens of divine strength
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  Speaker 1: her heart was quite shut up to me all the
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  Speaker 1: time I was there. Our Lord, however, made me foretell
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  Speaker 1: events which should happen, which since that time have actually
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  Speaker 1: been fulfilled, as well to herself as to her daughter,
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  Speaker 1: and to the virtuous ecclesiastic who lived at her house.
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  Speaker 1: She did not fail at least to conceive more friendship
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  Speaker 1: for me, seeing than that Christ was in me. It
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  Speaker 1: was the force of self love and fear of reproach
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  Speaker 1: which had closed up her heart. Moreover, she thought her
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  Speaker 1: state more advanced than in reality it was by reason
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  Speaker 1: of her being without tests. But she soon so by
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  Speaker 1: experience that I had told her the truth. She was
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  Speaker 1: obliged for family reasons to live Turin and go to
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  Speaker 1: live on her own estate. She solicited me to go
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  Speaker 1: with her, But the education of my daughter did not
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  Speaker 1: permit to stay at Turin without her seemed improper. Because
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  Speaker 1: having lived very retired in this place, I made no
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  Speaker 1: acquaintance in it, I knew not which way to turn.
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  Speaker 1: The Bishop of Versil, where Father la Combe was most obligingly,
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  Speaker 1: wrote to me earnestly in treating me to come, promising
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  Speaker 1: me his protection and assuring me of his esteem, adding
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  Speaker 1: that he should look upon me as his own sister,
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  Speaker 1: that he wished extremely to have me there. It was
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  Speaker 1: his own sister, one of my particular friends who had
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  Speaker 1: written to him about me, as had also a French gentleman,
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  Speaker 1: an acquaintance of his. But a point of honor kept
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  Speaker 1: me from it. I would not have it said that
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  Speaker 1: I had gone after Father la Combe, and that I
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  Speaker 1: had come to Turin only for the purpose of going
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  Speaker 1: to Brazil. He had also his reputation to preserve, which
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  Speaker 1: was the cause that he could not agree to my
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  Speaker 1: going thither. However importunate the Bishop was for it. Had
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  Speaker 1: we believe it to be the will of God, we
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  Speaker 1: would both of us have passed over this consideration. God
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  Speaker 1: kept us both in so great a dependence on his
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  Speaker 1: orders that he did not let us foreknow them. But
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  Speaker 1: the divine moment of His providence determined everything. This proved
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  Speaker 1: of very great service to Father la Combe, who had
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  Speaker 1: long walked in assurances to die to them and to himself. God,
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  Speaker 1: by an effect of his goodness, that he might that
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  Speaker 1: die without any reserve, took them all from him. During
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  Speaker 1: the whole time of my residence at Turin, our Lord
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  Speaker 1: conferred on me very great favors. I found myself every
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  Speaker 1: day more transformed into Him, and had continually more knowledge
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  Speaker 1: of the state of souls, without ever being mistaken or
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  Speaker 1: deceived therein, though somewhere willing to persuade me to think
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  Speaker 1: the contrary, I had used my utmost endeavors to give
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  Speaker 1: myself other thoughts, which has caused me not a little pain.
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  Speaker 1: When I told or wrote to Father la Combe about
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  Speaker 1: the state of some souls, which appeared to him more
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  Speaker 1: perfect and advanced than the knowledge given to me of them,
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  Speaker 1: he at debuted to pride. He was angry with me
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  Speaker 1: and prejudiced against my state. I had no uneasiness on
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  Speaker 1: account of his esteeming me the less, for I was
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  Speaker 1: not in a condition to reflect act whether he esteemed
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  Speaker 1: me or not. He could not reconcile my willing obedience
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  Speaker 1: in most things with so extraordinary firmness, which in certain
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  Speaker 1: cases he looked upon as criminal. He admitted a distrust
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  Speaker 1: of my grace. He was not yet sufficiently confirmed in
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  Speaker 1: this way, nor did he duly comprehend that it did
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  Speaker 1: not in any wise depended on me to be one
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  Speaker 1: way or another. If I had any such power, I
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  Speaker 1: should have suited myself to what he said. To spare
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  Speaker 1: myself the crosses which my firmness caused me, or at
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  Speaker 1: least I would have artfully dissembled my real sentiments, I
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  Speaker 1: could do neither where all, to perish by it. I
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  Speaker 1: was in such a manner constrained that I could not
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  Speaker 1: forbear telling him the things, just as our law directed
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  Speaker 1: me to tell them to him. In this he had
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  Speaker 1: given me an infilable fidelity to the very last. No
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  Speaker 1: crosses or pain have ever made me fail a moment
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  Speaker 1: Therein these things, then, which appeared to him to be
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  Speaker 1: the strong prejudice of a conceited opinion, set him at
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  Speaker 1: variance against me, though he did not openly show it.
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  Speaker 1: On the contrary, he tried to conceal it from me,
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  Speaker 1: Yet however far he was from me, I could not
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  Speaker 1: be ignorant of it. My spirit felt it, and that
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  Speaker 1: more or less as the opposition was stronger or weaker,
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  Speaker 1: as soon as it abated or ended, my pain occasionally
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  Speaker 1: thereby ceased. He also, on his side, experienced the same.
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  Speaker 1: He has told me and written to me many times over.
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  Speaker 1: When I stand well with God, I find I am
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  Speaker 1: well with you. When I am otherwise with Him, I
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  Speaker 1: then find myself to be so with you also. But
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  Speaker 1: he so clearly that when God received him, it was
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  Speaker 1: always in uniting him to Me, as if he would
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  Speaker 1: accept of nothing from him but in this union. While
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  Speaker 1: he was at Turin, a widow who was a good
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  Speaker 1: servant of God, all in the brightness of sensibility, came
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  Speaker 1: to him to confess. She uttered, wonderful things of your state.
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  Speaker 1: I was then at the other side of the confessional.
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  Speaker 1: He told me that he had met with a soul
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  Speaker 1: given up to God, that it was she who was present,
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  Speaker 1: that he was very much edified by her, that he
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  Speaker 1: was far from finding the like in me, that I
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  Speaker 1: operated nothing but death upon his soul. At first I
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  Speaker 1: rejoiced at his having met with such a holy soul.
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  Speaker 1: It ever gives me the highest joy to see my
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  Speaker 1: God glorified. As I was returning, the Lord showed me
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  Speaker 1: clearly the state of that soul, as only a beginning
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  Speaker 1: of devotion, mixed with affection, and a little silence, filled
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  Speaker 1: with a new sensation. And more, as it was said
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  Speaker 1: before me, I was obliged to write to him. On
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  Speaker 1: his first reading of my letter, he discovered the stump
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  Speaker 1: of the truth in it. But soon after letting in
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  Speaker 1: again his old reflections, he knew all I wrote in
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  Speaker 1: the light of pride. He still had in his mind
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  Speaker 1: the ordery rules of humility conceived and combines after our manner.
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  Speaker 1: As to me, I led myself to be led as
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  Speaker 1: a child who says and does without distinction whatever it
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  Speaker 1: is made to say and do. I left myself to
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  Speaker 1: be led wheresoever my heavenly father pleased I or low
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  Speaker 1: all was alike good to me. He wrote to me
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  Speaker 1: that at his first reading of my letter there appeared
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  Speaker 1: in it something of truth, but that on writting it
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  Speaker 1: over again, he found it to be full of pride
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  Speaker 1: and of preference of my own discernments to that of others.
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  Speaker 1: Some time after he was more enlightened in regard to
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  Speaker 1: the state I was in. He then said, continue to
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  Speaker 1: believe as you have done. I encourage and exhort you
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  Speaker 1: to do it. Some time after he sufficiently discovered by
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  Speaker 1: that person's manner of acting that she was very far
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  Speaker 1: from what she had thought. I give this as only
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  Speaker 1: one instance. I might give many others, but this may suffice.
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  Speaker 1: End of Chapter thirteen, Athens, Greece, April of two thousand nine,