Latest / The Mark Simone Show / Mark's Weekend Bonus Segment — NOT HEARD ON THE RADIO!
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Hey, it's Mark Simone. Welcome to the bonus segment. Just
- 0:03Speaker 1: for you podcast listeners. I'll give you an extra show
- 0:05Speaker 1: every week. Now, you know the TSA, the screening pain
- 0:11Speaker 1: in the neck, You got to go through that. But
- 0:12Speaker 1: a lot of people have this TSA pre check. You know,
- 0:17Speaker 1: you pay for that every year and you get pre
- 0:19Speaker 1: screened once and then you know that way you can
- 0:22Speaker 1: sail through the TSA screening a lot easier. Well, there's
- 0:25Speaker 1: a bunch of crazy Democrats in Congress who want to
- 0:30Speaker 1: get rid of the TSA pre check. They want to
- 0:33Speaker 1: ban it. They say it's elitist, it's discriminatory, it creates
- 0:38Speaker 1: separate classes. Well, it's open to anybody. Anybody can go
- 0:42Speaker 1: get it. You's got to be willing to pay for it.
- 0:44Speaker 1: I guess they think it's discrimination because people that pay
- 0:48Speaker 1: more get through faster. Well that's the case everywhere. Just
- 0:52Speaker 1: on an airplane, it's the case every place everywhere. Restaurants
- 0:57Speaker 1: of stadiums, venues. You need to buy certain VIP tickets
- 1:01Speaker 1: and get in faster and get all sorts of stuff.
- 1:04Speaker 1: But keep an eye on that. There's some people that say,
- 1:06Speaker 1: maybe we just get rid of the screening altogether. It
- 1:10Speaker 1: may sound crazy to some people, but if you go
- 1:12Speaker 1: back before nine to eleven, well it's a long time.
- 1:14Speaker 1: It's twenty five years ago. But twenty six years ago,
- 1:18Speaker 1: you could just show up at the airport the last
- 1:20Speaker 1: second and jump on the plane. You could just buy
- 1:23Speaker 1: a ticket right at the airport. You could flight leaving
- 1:26Speaker 1: at one o'clock. You get there twelve thirty. That was
- 1:28Speaker 1: more than enough time. In fact, if you took the
- 1:31Speaker 1: shuttle to Boston or the shuttle to Washington, remember the shuttle,
- 1:34Speaker 1: the Eastern Airline Shuttle was the other one, Delta Shuttle,
- 1:38Speaker 1: you didn't have to have a ticket. You could just
- 1:39Speaker 1: jump on the plane. You could. It was like a train.
- 1:42Speaker 1: You could buy your ticket on the plane. You could
- 1:45Speaker 1: just run into the airport, get on the plane, takes off.
- 1:48Speaker 1: In the middle of the flight, looks like a conductor
- 1:50Speaker 1: comes by and you buy a ticket. So about time
- 1:54Speaker 1: to change all of that stuff. Hey, Saturday Night Live,
- 1:58Speaker 1: you know it used to be very funny show that
- 2:01Speaker 1: everybody would watch. Now a handful of people watch. It's
- 2:04Speaker 1: not so funny anymore. Basically, now they got this big
- 2:09Speaker 1: cold open. That's the opening sketch, that's the one ever
- 2:12Speaker 1: talks about big celebrity. Guest host does a monologue, and
- 2:16Speaker 1: that's about it. Some people stay and watch that at midnight,
- 2:20Speaker 1: that fake newscast, and that's really it. Then they do
- 2:23Speaker 1: a bunch of sketches that stink that nobody watches. Then
- 2:27Speaker 1: they have the musical guest who nobody over a thirty
- 2:31Speaker 1: five has ever heard of. Don't even know. You know,
- 2:33Speaker 1: you're getting really old when you don't know who the
- 2:35Speaker 1: musical guest is anymore. But you're getting really ancient when
- 2:39Speaker 1: you don't know who the guest host is it anymore.
- 2:42Speaker 1: That's the case with a lot of people. There's ways
- 2:45Speaker 1: to know how old you are. For instance, when you
- 2:46Speaker 1: watch a baseball game, if you're older than the players,
- 2:53Speaker 1: well now you're starting to get old. If you're older
- 2:58Speaker 1: than the manager, you're really getting up there. And you
- 3:02Speaker 1: know when you're really old when you're older than the
- 3:04Speaker 1: owners of the team. So that's the problem. But I
- 3:07Speaker 1: was the point of this, Oh, Saturday Night Live. So
- 3:09Speaker 1: there's these media watchdog groups they started checking Saturday Night
- 3:14Speaker 1: Live as to how biased it is, how many of
- 3:18Speaker 1: the jokes are against conservatives, are not Democrats. Well, take
- 3:23Speaker 1: a guess now the number is ninety one percent, ninety
- 3:27Speaker 1: one percent. In the Weekend Updates segment, ninety one percent
- 3:32Speaker 1: of the jokes are against conservatives, very few ever against
- 3:38Speaker 1: a liberal. Now during the main during that cold open sketch,
- 3:43Speaker 1: how much of it is making fun of Republicans or
- 3:46Speaker 1: conservatives or Donald eighty two percent eighty two percent thanks
- 3:51Speaker 1: to the Media Research Center for that analysis. Obviously an
- 3:54Speaker 1: extremely biased show. Hey, those crazy global elitists are added
- 3:59Speaker 1: again a meeting in the United Nations. It's another thing
- 4:03Speaker 1: we got to get rid of that United Nations serves
- 4:05Speaker 1: absolutely no purpose whatsoever. They tie up traffic. It's over
- 4:11Speaker 1: there on the east side. It's valuable land. We could
- 4:13Speaker 1: put a lot of good stuff there. We could build
- 4:15Speaker 1: the condos there, or we could build a beautiful park there.
- 4:18Speaker 1: Just get rid of that monstrosity. But they're voting now
- 4:22Speaker 1: on You know, a lot of countries are getting rid
- 4:24Speaker 1: of this carbon tax and all this stuff. And the
- 4:27Speaker 1: green scheme has proved useless. And any time you try
- 4:31Speaker 1: the windmills or whatever, it's not only a disaster and
- 4:34Speaker 1: only produces no electricity, but it destroys the environment in
- 4:38Speaker 1: its own ways. Much of Europe Germany other countries went
- 4:42Speaker 1: wind power for a couple of years, then about a
- 4:45Speaker 1: year ago they had to take it all down. It
- 4:47Speaker 1: doesn't work. There's not enough energy. The energy from wind
- 4:50Speaker 1: costs ten times as much and it does more environmental
- 4:54Speaker 1: damage than the oil did than the gasoline did. It's
- 4:58Speaker 1: just a disaster. So it's all coming down all over
- 5:02Speaker 1: the place, and a lot of people are getting rid
- 5:04Speaker 1: of these carbon taxes and everything. But the UN elitist
- 5:07Speaker 1: they want to do the first world's global carbon tax,
- 5:13Speaker 1: and American families will have to pay it as if
- 5:15Speaker 1: Washington isn't ready, will form the world's first global carbon tax. Now,
- 5:21Speaker 1: I don't know how the hell the UN has any
- 5:23Speaker 1: enforcement rights on this, but it'll be basically they want
- 5:27Speaker 1: to tax America too. They'll be transferring America's wealth to
- 5:31Speaker 1: international bureaucrats who are accountable to absolutely nobody. Last October
- 5:39Speaker 1: President Trump really gave him a hard time, told him
- 5:43Speaker 1: absolutely not that he would fight them all the way. Hey,
- 5:45Speaker 1: you know, in Seattle they got the mom Donnie type mayor,
- 5:48Speaker 1: crazy left wing socialist kook chasing businesses out of there
- 5:53Speaker 1: catching up with her. Seattle was a red hot hot
- 5:56Speaker 1: housing market, I mean housing was on fire there. Prices
- 6:00Speaker 1: we're soaring. Starbucks announced they're leaving. They're moving to Nashville.
- 6:05Speaker 1: Amazon is moving to Virginia. Most of their operations Boeing
- 6:10Speaker 1: with some big, big, big part of Seattle. They're moved
- 6:12Speaker 1: their headquarters out of the city. So it's collapsing their
- 6:15Speaker 1: housing market. You got to remember when these big, massive
- 6:19Speaker 1: corporations move, not only do you get less text revenue,
- 6:24Speaker 1: but they got lots and lots and lots of employees.
- 6:26Speaker 1: So that can be one thousand, two thousand, ten thousand
- 6:29Speaker 1: people moving out, which suddenly means thousands and thousands of
- 6:33Speaker 1: houses come on the market. Now you have fifteen companies
- 6:37Speaker 1: that move out, that's hundreds of thousands of houses come
- 6:40Speaker 1: on the market. Too much inventory, completely completely screws up
- 6:46Speaker 1: your housing market. Hey, you ever notice that women always
- 6:50Speaker 1: take a shower at night before they go to bed.
- 6:53Speaker 1: Most men get up in the morning and take a shower.
- 6:57Speaker 1: That's when you're supposed to take a shower. You wake up,
- 7:00Speaker 1: you take a shower. Women take a shower to go
- 7:02Speaker 1: to bed. And never figured it out, but there's big
- 7:05Speaker 1: differences between men and women. You know, whenever a man
- 7:07Speaker 1: sees a thermostent brings a temperature down, woman sees a
- 7:12Speaker 1: thermoistent brings a temperature up. But anyway, this shower question,
- 7:16Speaker 1: so scientists have actually studied this. Now, because you try
- 7:20Speaker 1: to explain to women, what's the point of taking a
- 7:22Speaker 1: shower before you go to beds when you wake up,
- 7:24Speaker 1: that you need it it's more helpful. So microbiologists have
- 7:29Speaker 1: looked at this. It turns out, well, let's see this
- 7:33Speaker 1: is interesting. Forty two percent of adults take a shower
- 7:36Speaker 1: in the morning. Forty two percent take it in the morning,
- 7:39Speaker 1: twenty five percent take it before they go to bed.
- 7:44Speaker 1: Now you're saying, well, wait a minute, that doesn't add
- 7:47Speaker 1: up to one hundred percent. That's only sixty seven percent. Yeah, well,
- 7:51Speaker 1: apparently there's a lot of people that never take a shower,
- 7:53Speaker 1: not every day. But when you shower, you're washing away dirt, sweat,
- 7:57Speaker 1: dead skin cells that to accumulate on your body. It's
- 8:03Speaker 1: very good for you. Now, the night showers say that
- 8:07Speaker 1: rinsing off before bed helps remove all that so it
- 8:10Speaker 1: doesn't end up all over your sheets. But apparently microbiologists
- 8:15Speaker 1: experts say that's not a good theory because when you sleep,
- 8:19Speaker 1: you still sweat overnight, no matter how cool you keep
- 8:24Speaker 1: the bedroom. You don't realize it, but you're sweating and
- 8:27Speaker 1: you're shedding stuff in your sleep your skin. Microbes eat
- 8:32Speaker 1: the nutrients in the sweat. Well, I don't want to
- 8:33Speaker 1: go in all the detail. I get the little gruesome
- 8:35Speaker 1: in here. But that means in the morning you got
- 8:38Speaker 1: microbes all over the place. You need to shower those off.
- 8:42Speaker 1: So you need the shower in the morning. It serves,
- 8:46Speaker 1: it's more helpful to you, It serves a better purpose
- 8:48Speaker 1: to shower in the morning. Not to mention, you'll be
- 8:52Speaker 1: more refreshed and everything, but you don't want all those
- 8:54Speaker 1: microbes all over your skin. And when you're putting on
- 8:57Speaker 1: fresh clothes, you'll also start the day with less sweat.
- 9:01Speaker 1: Now you might not feel the sweat, but it's there
- 9:04Speaker 1: and it's odor producing. So if you want to be fresher,
- 9:07Speaker 1: smell better. According to actual experts, scientists, microbiologists, a shower
- 9:14Speaker 1: in the morning much much much more efficient, much more helpful.
- 9:18Speaker 1: And as far as whatever you know you're cleaning off
- 9:21Speaker 1: you won't get on your sheets, doesn't matter. Hopefully you're
- 9:24Speaker 1: always washing your sheets and your pillowcases, so it's official
- 9:28Speaker 1: from science. Take a shower in the morning and not
- 9:32Speaker 1: before you go to sleep. Hey. JD. Vance doing this interview,
- 9:36Speaker 1: and he talked about there's sort of an unwritten dress
- 9:40Speaker 1: code with President Trump. If you're in the cabinet, he
- 9:44Speaker 1: expects you to follow it. He expects you to be
- 9:46Speaker 1: very dressed up, suit and tie, nice shiny black shoes
- 9:50Speaker 1: and all that. That's part of the dress code. Now
- 9:53Speaker 1: it's not enforced, but Vance said, if you show up
- 9:57Speaker 1: with brown shoes, he'll give you a look. President believes
- 10:03Speaker 1: they're not as formal as shining black shoes. The President
- 10:07Speaker 1: has a certain sense that you must respect the place,
- 10:10Speaker 1: show respect for the institution. Also, a dark suit, not
- 10:15Speaker 1: a light suit. You remember Sean Spicer was Press secretary
- 10:18Speaker 1: in the first term. At the beginning first press conference,
- 10:22Speaker 1: he had like a light gray suit, and the President
- 10:24Speaker 1: apparently was watching TV, turn to everybody and said, doesn't
- 10:28Speaker 1: this guy own a dark suit? What's he wearing that for?
- 10:30Speaker 1: So Vance revealing it is like, if you're not wearing
- 10:35Speaker 1: a dark suit, black shoes, he'll give you a funny look.
- 10:38Speaker 1: Dark dark suit, navy or dark blue or black, very
- 10:43Speaker 1: dark gray. He prefers solid ties, but it must always
- 10:47Speaker 1: be black shoes. Again, it's not a rule, it's not
- 10:51Speaker 1: enforce but he advances he'll bust your chops if you
- 10:55Speaker 1: got brown shoes on. He does comment on the attire
- 11:00Speaker 1: of others and sometimes his own family. Eric Trump is
- 11:03Speaker 1: usually dressed like Donald Trump, but Don Junior no. In fact,
- 11:10Speaker 1: according to Vance, he has picked on Don Junior a lot.
- 11:13Speaker 1: Don Junior likes brown shoes, and Don Junior likes those
- 11:17Speaker 1: spread collars. You know, a very Italian Milan looking, very
- 11:22Speaker 1: widespread collar. It's very fashionable. But Trump hates that, always
- 11:26Speaker 1: gives Don Junior a hard time about the He'll say, hey,
- 11:28Speaker 1: it's a pretty wide collar you got there. And the
- 11:33Speaker 1: brown shoes. There's a lot of guys. It's an Italian thing.
- 11:36Speaker 1: You go to Italy, if you go to Rome or Milan,
- 11:38Speaker 1: Italians wear a dark suit with brown shoes. It's an
- 11:42Speaker 1: Italian thing. Americans try to copy it. It never looks
- 11:45Speaker 1: the same here because they never get the right shade
- 11:47Speaker 1: of brown or any of that. And they've renamed the
- 11:50Speaker 1: Palm Beach Airport Donald J. Trump International Airport. It was
- 11:57Speaker 1: an important thing to do just to drive liberals nuts.
- 12:00Speaker 1: Plenty of left wing cooks plenty of Trump haters in
- 12:02Speaker 1: Palm Beach just to drive them nuts. When they get
- 12:05Speaker 1: to Palm Beach International Airport, now it'll say Donald J.
- 12:09Speaker 1: Trump International Airport. The ticket, the boarding pass, everything will
- 12:13Speaker 1: say Donald J. Trump all over it. The luggage tag
- 12:16Speaker 1: will say Donald J. Trump, The code will be DJT.
- 12:19Speaker 1: It'll drive them nuts. They'll say it's a terrible disgusting.
- 12:23Speaker 1: But airport's all over the place, all over the place
- 12:27Speaker 1: are named for president, especially if they had if they
- 12:30Speaker 1: came from that area. There's eight major airports named for presidents.
- 12:35Speaker 1: If you're in Springfield, Illinois, it's Abraham Lincoln Capitol Airport,
- 12:40Speaker 1: Abraham Lincoln Capitol Airport, because that's where he was from.
- 12:44Speaker 1: If you're in North Dakota, there's Theodore Roosevelt Regional Airport.
- 12:49Speaker 1: If you're in Wichita, it's the Dwight D. Eisenhower National Airport,
- 12:53Speaker 1: and that's where he's from. You know, Grand Rapids, it's
- 12:56Speaker 1: a big city now, it's a pretty big city. In Michigan,
- 12:59Speaker 1: it's gerald Ford International Airport because that's where he's from.
- 13:03Speaker 1: And of course you got Kennedy Airport, you got the
- 13:05Speaker 1: Reagan Airport in Washington, DC. In Houston, it's George Bush
- 13:11Speaker 1: International Airport, believe it or not. In Little Rockets, Bill
- 13:15Speaker 1: and Hillary Clinton National Airport. So's nothing wrong with a
- 13:20Speaker 1: Donald J. Trump International Airport. It's a good thing. Hey,
- 13:24Speaker 1: we're out of time, but thanks for listening to the podcast.
- 13:27Speaker 1: Thanks for always being here for us, and if you
- 13:30Speaker 1: want to listen live, I'm here Monday through Friday ten
- 13:33Speaker 1: to noon. I'll see you then. Take care and have
- 13:35Speaker 1: a great weekend.