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JUST A CHAT WITH BARBIE: FIRST TIMES FOR EVERYTHING · CALL ME MISTRESS

• 0:07
  Hi, welcome to the latest episode of Mistress Mia's
• 0:09
  Dungeon. I'm your Hostess, Mistress Mia,
• 0:12
  and you know it's her. She's here.
• 0:16
  Bob Barbie. Hi bitches, I love it.
• 0:21
  And we are ladies of leisure, sitting in the living room.
• 0:24
  All spread out. Yeah, Barbie just looked at me.
• 0:28
  She's like, yeah, I'm sorry about this.
• 0:30
  I'm just all out here on your couch.
• 0:32
  Sit like a lady, it's OK. I wear 2 inch mini skirts and
• 0:36
  sit like a man and you have to deal with it.
• 0:41
  I literally had the mannerisms of a man.
• 0:45
  I'm glad you admit to that because it's fucking hilarious.
• 0:50
  But you go ahead and spread that testosterone.
• 0:53
  We're we're happy about that. Someone has to be a man around
• 0:55
  here because these men ain't cutting it shit.
• 0:59
  I'm not the fucking true. It was it's always really funny
• 1:02
  like at the dungeon the the last part of the pirates one when I
• 1:06
  was in those like like 8 inch heels.
• 1:09
  This one guy was like, yeah, when I walked in and you stood
• 1:12
  up and had to look up with you, look up at you.
• 1:14
  It was crazy because like, I was so tall.
• 1:16
  And he was like, no, I couldn't believe it.
• 1:18
  And I believe Sinister was sitting there going you should
• 1:21
  model. You should be a model.
• 1:22
  And I was like, Oh my God, thanks.
• 1:24
  More compliments. Shaman is.
• 1:25
  Awesome and Shaman is absolutely right.
• 1:28
  You know, you possess this look about you that is so unique.
• 1:34
  And like you said, you're always dressed goth and it's just, you
• 1:36
  know, it's just, it's. Cool, being a blonde goth is
• 1:39
  very fun. It is.
• 1:40
  It is awesome. Bimbo goth, so OK.
• 1:47
  On that note, Bimbo Goth, you said on our last episode, you
• 1:52
  said that literally people take things too serious in BDSM.
• 1:57
  Yeah. So let's talk about that.
• 1:59
  Yeah, I think there are things like that should be taking
• 2:02
  seriously, obviously consent and safety, but I feel like
• 2:06
  interpersonal dynamics can get so like muddy sometimes.
• 2:10
  Cause for me, I just feel like, you know, we're all in the same
• 2:15
  field, you know, I don't think there should be like, Oh well so
• 2:19
  and so does this is I just don't like how they operate.
• 2:21
  But blah, blah. Like there shouldn't be all this
• 2:22
  like competition. I feel like you see in it where
• 2:25
  I'm like, look, we all want the same thing to just be weird.
• 2:29
  So like we should just all be weird together and be more
• 2:31
  successful instead of like trying to like outdo the other
• 2:35
  one, you know? It's so true.
• 2:37
  It really is so fucking true. But I feel like you get that in
• 2:40
  like any like niche community because like when I used to be
• 2:43
  in the punk scene, it was the same way.
• 2:46
  Like people just have a little like pissing competition to see
• 2:49
  who could like be the coolest or like smoke the most cigarettes
• 2:51
  or something stupid. Yeah, right.
• 2:53
  Just. Like who's who's the most
• 2:55
  hardcore? I'm like, who cares?
• 2:57
  We're all in a dirty basement right now.
• 2:59
  We're all losers. And then here it's like, you
• 3:03
  know, it's a little different, but I'm like, who cares?
• 3:06
  We're all in the dungeon. We're all here for one reason,
• 3:08
  you know. Yes.
• 3:11
  You know, and like you said, you said this in the end of the last
• 3:13
  episode, and that was, you know, we all kind of hit each other
• 3:16
  and we do silly stuff that most people are like, what the fuck
• 3:19
  are they doing? Yeah.
• 3:21
  So it's like, why take it so serious?
• 3:22
  You know? You know, there's high protocol.
• 3:27
  There's, you know, things that that go back to, you know,
• 3:31
  centuries ago and the shit they used to do to people.
• 3:34
  Yeah, you know. Like medieval torture.
• 3:37
  Yeah, you know, and it's like. I was really in like into
• 3:42
  looking that stuff up when I was like in middle school.
• 3:44
  Yeah. And I think there's, yeah,
• 3:48
  that's fun. That's that's good and great.
• 3:51
  But at the same time, you know, we're, we're in a different era
• 3:55
  of things, you know, and it's like people have such a
• 3:59
  difficult time who aren't in the lifestyle.
• 4:01
  We call vanillas and we call them vanillas for a reason.
• 4:04
  You know, I think they're basic bitch bitches.
• 4:09
  I can. Respect the vanilla 'cause I'd
• 4:11
  say as kinky as I am, I'm not not vanilla too 'cause sometimes
• 4:15
  you just want to fuck normally. And that was my point in that,
• 4:20
  you know, it's OK to be vanilla and it's fine to be basic, but
• 4:24
  ultimately, like you said. Compared to a lot of people,
• 4:27
  yeah. Oh, you are.
• 4:29
  You are. Because you don't like crazy
• 4:31
  shit. You know, like I like crazy
• 4:33
  shit. I'm more of a sensual person, so
• 4:35
  it takes quite a few things off the table almost instantly.
• 4:39
  Right. So today Abby and I, we were
• 4:42
  sitting and we're chatting and we were thinking of ways that we
• 4:46
  could possibly abuse Charles. So we were sitting really
• 4:51
  conspiring on how we're going to torture this man.
• 4:54
  And you know, so recently we used a penis pump.
• 4:58
  Now we've got a penis pump in the dungeon.
• 5:00
  I don't know if you've used it yet.
• 5:01
  There's a manual one and there's an electric one I tried.
• 5:04
  To with the sexy guy, but it wouldn't fit.
• 5:06
  Oh, the sexy guy. Yeah.
• 5:09
  From the Jack I tried to couldn't.
• 5:13
  Get it in. Oh my God, 'cause he was too
• 5:15
  big. Holy fuck he didn't.
• 5:18
  Fit any of your cages either he had to go buy.
• 5:20
  One Oh my God Barbie, your biggest problem is a man who
• 5:26
  literally is obsessed with you and wants you to Dom him.
• 5:30
  He has a Dick too big to fit in the penis, bumps cylindrical.
• 5:35
  Tube with a condom on. With the fucking condom holy.
• 5:38
  Fuck. Me God bless.
• 5:41
  God bless. Oh.
• 5:43
  God, I love when a man knows his place.
• 5:45
  Woo. Yeah, yeah, back to torturing.
• 5:49
  Oh my God, yeah I'm still thinking about.
• 5:51
  Please take a picture of that. You need to send me some naughty
• 5:55
  Dick pics of him. That is for so certain.
• 5:59
  I don't think he'd like. Oh he won't mind, he posts shit
• 6:02
  on fat life. That's true, Jack.
• 6:04
  Send me a bone. Send.
• 6:07
  Me a picture of your penis right now.
• 6:11
  OK so two things. So we used the penis pump one
• 6:14
  time on Charles when we were all together one evening and 1st
• 6:19
  Abby used the electric one and the electric 1 immediately
• 6:22
  sucked up his balls and he's like, yeah, what?
• 6:26
  Yes. Sit in there.
• 6:27
  Yes, I've never seen his penis. No.
• 6:29
  Yes, I have. I've hit it with fire I.
• 6:31
  Forgot. OK, yeah, there you go.
• 6:32
  Not to look at it there, and the thing of it is you're not much
• 6:39
  into Dicks, but the fact that Jack has such a huge fucking
• 6:43
  cock, I like Jesus. I'm just picky about.
• 6:45
  Ohk, OK, you're picky. No.
• 6:47
  I do. I know I love men, I have a
• 6:49
  preference for them, but I also OK.
• 6:51
  OK alright good to love hate relationship and like that.
• 6:56
  But anywho so I went and I said look we have the manual, let's
• 7:00
  use the manual penis pump because that way you can control
• 7:04
  it exactly. I like that little sound effect.
• 7:06
  I like that. But anywho so God big Dicks I'm
• 7:12
  still thinking about this. Did you?
• 7:13
  Did you see my recent post yesterday I posted?
• 7:16
  I almost said some stupid shit underneath.
• 7:18
  It you can. Almost said me not what the fuck
• 7:21
  is this? OK.
• 7:26
  So. So I was awake at 3:00 in the
• 7:30
  morning and what do I do? I thought, you know, I love
• 7:33
  Elvis. I'm.
• 7:34
  I don't know much about Elvis, so for a second I was like, this
• 7:36
  isn't real, right? No, it's not real.
• 7:39
  I don't know. But somebody knows how to really
• 7:43
  Photoshop? Yeah, really.
• 7:44
  Photoshop Well. I think Peter Steele is hot and
• 7:47
  he's from Type O Negative and he did a Playgirl shoot and he was
• 7:52
  fully naked, has a giant penis. So I like, did did Elvis do that
• 7:55
  too? Like.
• 7:56
  Oh God, no. No, I don't.
• 7:58
  Know anything about Elvis? They didn't have play girl.
• 8:00
  OK, well Elvis came popular back in 1954 and then born.
• 8:05
  That year. Oh, yeah.
• 8:08
  OK, OK. So then he really hit it big
• 8:11
  when it was like 1958. OK, so after that point, I mean
• 8:16
  it just kind of went crazy and he was known most because he
• 8:20
  would jerk his hips. I knew that that was huge for
• 8:24
  me. A little slut, yeah.
• 8:25
  It was a big slut and but he was at the same time this down home
• 8:29
  country boy famous. Too.
• 8:30
  You really need to update and go back on some history.
• 8:34
  I refuse. I'm telling.
• 8:36
  I'm saying ignorant. But I was bored last night and I
• 8:39
  was like, oh, let's see if anybody has photoshopped some
• 8:42
  Elvis naked pictures. Thing for Elvis.
• 8:45
  I have a big. Thing for Elvis, my grandma.
• 8:47
  Oh God. You're not my girl, but my
• 8:50
  grandma also has a thing I. Am not your grandma, but she
• 8:52
  also has a thing. For the Blue Angels.
• 8:54
  OK, well, you know, hoorah. OK, Yeah, I.
• 8:58
  Can't say anything about it. That's OK, I love the Blue
• 9:01
  Angels, that's great. But Elvis is one individual and
• 9:04
  he was fucking perfect. But yeah, somebody cropped and
• 9:09
  photoshopped 2 pictures of him his face on these bodies and I
• 9:15
  didn't post the one in black and white.
• 9:17
  I'm going to show it to you. Flicking it to it.
• 9:19
  Oh. My God, my my husband told me
• 9:26
  that this morning he was just like.
• 9:28
  You're too busy flicking the bean to hit upload.
• 9:30
  Yeah, he was like, did you fucking like Jack off to fucking
• 9:33
  masturbation? Or our picture of pictures of
• 9:36
  Elvis. Like, you know, did they have
• 9:38
  any videos of him jacking his Dick?
• 9:40
  I was like, of course not. Hey, you gotta wait.
• 9:42
  I. Wish fake AI technology gets
• 9:44
  better than Commission one of these nerds to make you a Elvis
• 9:47
  porn. Exactly like look at this one.
• 9:48
  This is one the other one. That's a big Dick.
• 9:51
  That's a big Dick. That's a Jack Dick and it's
• 9:56
  flaccid in this. Picture and it's like, listen to
• 9:58
  the podcast. He comes up all the time.
• 10:00
  I said he doesn't. I'm so good.
• 10:01
  He comes up all the time. Good.
• 10:03
  OK, I don't. Even know if he knows it exists.
• 10:05
  Oh my God, I'm sure he does. He might just not be a podcast
• 10:08
  listener. That's fine with me.
• 10:10
  A lot of people aren't. That's OK.
• 10:12
  Keep talking because I will tell him you know Barbie is on the.
• 10:18
  No, I will suddenly not be on the podcast.
• 10:20
  Listen. Bitch, look, I'm nervous about
• 10:22
  boys. Don't say that.
• 10:26
  I think you get nervous around boys who are interested in you.
• 10:28
  I. Do a boy that's interested in me
• 10:30
  that I'm interested back immediate.
• 10:32
  I'm like, I can't function. Me was like go over there and
• 10:37
  like tell him like I forgot what you told me to say.
• 10:40
  It was so forward though. Yeah.
• 10:41
  And I was like, and I looked you deadly.
• 10:43
  I said, Mia, there is not a like a universe in which I ever say
• 10:47
  that to somebody. I I said to.
• 10:49
  I said to you to tell him so do you want me to own you?
• 10:52
  Yeah, but. You told me to go grab his ass
• 10:54
  and say it or something like yes of.
• 10:56
  Course you grab his ass, he's got a fucking sexy.
• 10:58
  Ass have permission before I can grab someone's.
• 11:01
  Ass you had permission when he got on that wall, we started to
• 11:04
  do the scene. Before we did the scene.
• 11:07
  Oh, was it? Yeah.
• 11:08
  That was the first thing you told me to.
• 11:10
  Tell oh God and I. Was like I cannot do.
• 11:14
  You notice how I am very forward, like I really don't
• 11:16
  hold back. Yeah, I, I went up and talked to
• 11:18
  him and I, and I was surprised I got it because there's, I think
• 11:21
  when he came in, immediately I think two other girls went up
• 11:24
  there and you went, oh, they're getting him.
• 11:25
  And I was like, and then Mia was like, go talk to him, go talk to
• 11:28
  him. And I was like, see me, I'm so
• 11:29
  scared. It's just like, do it.
• 11:31
  And I went over there and I, I think I barely said anything.
• 11:34
  And then it ended up working in my.
• 11:36
  Favor it did. And I'm just like, own your
• 11:38
  shit. You got to say in your mind, I
• 11:40
  am the fucking shit. I am the bond.
• 11:41
  I am. I just nobody comes close to me.
• 11:44
  I'm just a girl. No, you're a woman here.
• 11:49
  You. I'm a woman until I like a guy,
• 11:51
  then I'm like he he just to cure.
• 11:54
  You're doing the Michael Jackson thing.
• 11:57
  But anyway, you know we're hating on men the last episode.
• 12:02
  Yeah, oh, you were telling me about Charles and what y'all
• 12:04
  were doing. Oh yeah, just just torture, you
• 12:06
  know, just overall torture. Just for fun.
• 12:08
  I was. Explaining to me things, the
• 12:09
  last party things I could do and explain to me what a zipper was
• 12:14
  and all this kind of stuff. I'm gonna have him make you a
• 12:16
  zipper. Yeah, with the clothes pins.
• 12:19
  Yeah, I'm gonna have him make you one.
• 12:21
  The guy I did the other day that I had mentioned a podcast or so
• 12:25
  ago, that was my favorite scene. He wanted to do CBT.
• 12:30
  Yeah. And I'm newer to all this and
• 12:32
  like, you left me like with them by myself, which was fine, but
• 12:35
  I'm still working on like, getting creative about things.
• 12:38
  And so I did the CBT with them. And when I took off the clothes
• 12:42
  pins, I guess I had like done it.
• 12:46
  He liked it all so it's not bad, but he had little purple spots
• 12:49
  all over his balls from where they were because I was whacking
• 12:52
  the the clothes poo. Yeah.
• 12:55
  And it was, it was honestly kind of fun.
• 12:56
  He had me like step on his Dick in my giant goth girl platforms
• 13:00
  and I strung them up from the little chains in the ceiling.
• 13:04
  And he's short, shorter than me, like what, 5-4?
• 13:07
  And I was kicking him and his little feet would come off the
• 13:09
  ground and he was like spinning. In the was this Jack or Charles?
• 13:14
  Neither. It was that it was that new guy
• 13:16
  that came like a week or so ago from out of town.
• 13:19
  Oh. OK, Jack.
• 13:20
  'S like 62. Yeah, I was gonna say.
• 13:22
  Jack's big no, this was this was that client, the new client?
• 13:26
  I think he's a firefighter, the one who got over an hour.
• 13:28
  Oh, that's right. Small And so this is the guy
• 13:31
  who's doing CBD with Jack. Doesn't like CBD or anything
• 13:34
  like that, but I was like stepping on his Dick and I
• 13:37
  hadn't think about kicking him, like planting my foot and
• 13:39
  pushing him and he was coming up off the floor and it was so
• 13:43
  funny because he's awesome. Started running from me, but
• 13:45
  he's chained up so we're just running a little circles.
• 13:47
  It was so, it was so like Looney Tunes.
• 13:49
  It was hilarious. So did he like CBT?
• 13:51
  He loved it. And then then he was like,
• 13:53
  actually, like, you know, I didn't think I'd ask for this
• 13:56
  today, but this is actually my fantasy.
• 13:57
  Like can you tickle me? And so I Oh my God, that's my
• 14:01
  favorite. Tickling him but he starts
• 14:03
  giggling and like running from me.
• 14:05
  So we're I'm chasing him in a circle but he's hooked up to the
• 14:07
  ceiling so he can't go anywhere. And it was so funny because I
• 14:11
  would just randomly like stop tickling and just push the shit
• 14:13
  out of it and he'd fly up off the ground.
• 14:15
  That's how I broke the the handcuffs because he came above
• 14:18
  the ground and it snapped. On Oh my God, that's.
• 14:21
  Awesome. No, but he apparently really
• 14:23
  enjoyed his time and he's like, I really enjoyed this.
• 14:25
  I was like, tell me a leave me a good review, He said.
• 14:30
  He's going to come see me next year whenever he comes back
• 14:32
  down. But I really enjoyed that scene
• 14:34
  because it was literally just like BDSM and CBT and all that
• 14:38
  kind. Of And there wasn't bullshit.
• 14:40
  Yeah, and he was sweet and friendly.
• 14:42
  That's possible. Like I don't mind the the
• 14:44
  pegging and the other stuff like that, but my favorite is when
• 14:47
  it's just BDSM and just. Kink.
• 14:50
  And not like a service, if that makes sense.
• 14:53
  Yes, because for me, I'm like, I feel like I can get really
• 14:55
  creative and comfortable with it because I don't have to worry
• 14:57
  about like double gloving up or anything.
• 15:00
  Like they're like, Oh yeah, I want you to like, really go deep
• 15:02
  in my asshole or. Can you hold my hand and they
• 15:05
  can't even take like a wench little like vibrator thing off
• 15:09
  the cock ring. Nothing.
• 15:10
  They can't take anything. I think they have this fantasy
• 15:13
  of it being like taking a giant Dick.
• 15:15
  They do. And then you like put in the
• 15:16
  tiniest Dick in there and they're.
• 15:20
  Like and you know what? I think yellow, red.
• 15:24
  I'm like, it's not even in dude. You know what I think it is too.
• 15:28
  I think that they're trying to fill a void, literally.
• 15:34
  Hello. Hello.
• 15:36
  That one guy needed his void filled from the other week.
• 15:40
  The what? The guy with the speculum.
• 15:42
  Oh God. But I think they're trying to
• 15:45
  fill a mental void. And the fact that, you know,
• 15:48
  there's something about a cock, you know, and filling that hole,
• 15:52
  it's like filling a void. My favorite boy to film.
• 15:58
  It's like, it's like making me laugh too hard.
• 16:04
  I'm looking at you and I'm laughing too hard.
• 16:07
  But it's, it's like this, this emotional disconnect that they
• 16:11
  have with something in their life and they feel like they
• 16:14
  need it. So it's like when they come here
• 16:16
  and they're vulnerable and they want.
• 16:18
  That that guys that come here don't experiment within
• 16:22
  themselves before they get here. Because like, they don't come.
• 16:25
  Coming to a dungeon seems like such a big leap.
• 16:28
  Yeah. But like, you rather like come
• 16:30
  to the dungeon and see professional dominatrixes before
• 16:34
  you'll even buy yourself a butt plug.
• 16:36
  Like to me, that seems like an insane jump.
• 16:38
  They and they and it's most, most guys that come in that are
• 16:41
  new, you'll be like, what do you want to do?
• 16:43
  They're like, well, I don't really know anything about this.
• 16:45
  How did you find this? Like, why?
• 16:48
  What happened? They'll be here for like BDS and
• 16:50
  they're like, well, I don't really know anything about any
• 16:52
  of it. And I'm like.
• 16:54
  But see, those are my favorite. Ones they're my favorites too
• 16:56
  because like you can be more creative with them, but it's
• 16:59
  like especially with the guys who like really want to get
• 17:01
  pegged and have never had anything in their ass.
• 17:04
  I'm like, you didn't even like, you know, shove something up
• 17:07
  there on your own randomly. Yeah, that no.
• 17:10
  They would feel gay if they did it.
• 17:12
  That's the thing. That's.
• 17:13
  Crazy. It's a different It's a Dick in
• 17:16
  your ass. Come on, get over it.
• 17:19
  The world would be a better place if more men admitted
• 17:21
  they're bisexual. I know, but it's different when
• 17:23
  a woman is doing it. They don't feel gay then it's
• 17:26
  like a woman's being a servant making them do it.
• 17:29
  That's the difference. Next time I'm picking, I'll be
• 17:31
  like you like that. It's just like when you get a
• 17:33
  guy to suck a Dick, they're not going to do it on their own if
• 17:37
  they feel gay. I've had a guy who'd do it on
• 17:39
  his own and it was magnificent. Because they're very bisexual
• 17:44
  and they admit to it, I'm sure. Oh yeah, I know.
• 17:45
  He's openly bisexual. It was amazing.
• 17:47
  But you know, many men that I've played with in the dungeon,
• 17:50
  especially if they've always been like, I'm not gay or
• 17:52
  anything while they're fucking some Gotti.
• 17:56
  Had me like Saran, wrap him down, fuck the shit out of him,
• 17:59
  do all the stuff out of him. And then like at the end he's
• 18:01
  like, you know, I'm I'm a dominant person in life.
• 18:03
  I'm like dude, how you just came because I put my my hand over
• 18:08
  your mouth like. And that cute.
• 18:12
  Just brutalized you for an hour and I was like I'm a dominant
• 18:14
  person, I do jujitsu okay and I do you.
• 18:20
  And by fucking I meant I, I pegged him.
• 18:22
  I did not fuck this man. So I want to specify so y'all
• 18:25
  don't get your fucking hopes up. The fact that he tried to
• 18:29
  validate himself by telling you I do jiu jitsu like that makes
• 18:32
  me more of a man. My my favorite and least
• 18:35
  favorite part of working in the dungeon is the after
• 18:38
  conversation. I'm not talking about aftercare,
• 18:40
  but like when they want to talk to me and it's like they it's
• 18:43
  like I get a little interview and Mia will leave the room and
• 18:46
  then they'll just start asking questions.
• 18:47
  How long have we been doing this?
• 18:48
  Yeah. How did I figure it out?
• 18:51
  Do I like it? Do I like them?
• 18:52
  What do I like doing? And I'm like, I don't, oh, man,
• 18:56
  I'm trying to. I'm trying to bleach everything
• 18:57
  right now. I'm sorry.
• 19:01
  You're like scrubbing the Gurney.
• 19:03
  And I'm like, yeah, I don't know.
• 19:05
  I've been doing it like a month. Oh.
• 19:13
  My God, you can do fucking. Stand up on this shit.
• 19:15
  Never expected. What's that?
• 19:17
  I said they want hugs when they leave.
• 19:19
  Isn't that? Amazing you a hug.
• 19:22
  Yeah, I guess I was just in your ass.
• 19:23
  Come on. Give Mama some sugar, baby.
• 19:29
  I don't think I get called. I don't.
• 19:31
  I get called mommy online but not in person.
• 19:33
  It's really interesting. Wait until you're 40.
• 19:35
  Wait until you're 40, baby. You know it's a.
• 19:37
  Popular thing like a trend to call goth girls like dummy mommy
• 19:40
  and goth mommy and I used to really hate it.
• 19:43
  I'm very neutral on it now, but yeah, I'll get DMS like like
• 19:48
  step on me, mommy. I'm like, hey, I actually do
• 19:50
  that now so I can, I can actually do that for you for the
• 19:53
  low, low price. Fuck, you know, I really fucking
• 19:58
  hate is when someone sees the word DOMME Dom or domme, right.
• 20:06
  But a lot of these little trans girls or a lot of, you know, you
• 20:11
  know, men that are very femme, they think it's Domme.
• 20:15
  And it's like. That's where dummy Mommy.
• 20:17
  Comes yes, that's what they think and I'm like don't fucking
• 20:22
  call me that. To me, it dummy is too close to
• 20:24
  dummy. Don't call me dummy mommy
• 20:28
  people. Call me mistress.
• 20:29
  I'm like, I'm too dumb to be called mistress.
• 20:31
  Call me dummy. Fuck.
• 20:36
  Yeah, I don't. I don't like Mistress that much.
• 20:38
  Feels. I don't know.
• 20:39
  I think it's because I'm not a mistress.
• 20:41
  I don't. I like ma'am, OK?
• 20:43
  Or Goddess maybe? Goddess is appropriate.
• 20:46
  See, to me, I'm the Mistress. Because you own it.
• 20:49
  And I'm just like in your little brothel house.
• 20:51
  I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
• 20:52
  Do not call the. Police that word all fucking
• 20:55
  together. Do not call the.
• 20:56
  Police. I'm safe, my God.
• 21:00
  No. Delete.
• 21:01
  Delete. Quick, quick.
• 21:05
  So there's like y'all can't see it, but there's like sniper like
• 21:07
  red dots all over me right now because I said that means it's
• 21:09
  going to have me executed. So, yeah, so Needless to say, we
• 21:18
  have to reiterate this, but taking things too serious, yeah,
• 21:22
  we went off on a tangent. Oh, that's my job.
• 21:25
  OK, so you you went to the local dungeon before several times.
• 21:29
  Have you seen people act way too fucking serious on shit?
• 21:32
  Yeah. So at the public dungeon, I will
• 21:35
  say there was a guy I met there and he was really nice and he
• 21:38
  was one of the first guys I met. He was my age.
• 21:41
  And what drew me to him is that when he goes in there, he is in
• 21:44
  dress pants and a white button up.
• 21:46
  And it's not that fancy looking like the sleeves are rolled up,
• 21:49
  it's unbuttoned. But that effort alone, like
• 21:52
  really like all the friends I brought there immediately were
• 21:55
  drawn to him. Like all my friends that were
• 21:57
  interested in men. And what does that tell you
• 21:59
  though? And I'll tell you this, he's not
• 22:01
  even like like looks like the hottest guy you've ever seen.
• 22:04
  He's a normal guy and that's not an insult.
• 22:06
  He's cute, but he's a normal guy.
• 22:08
  And that's like, I feel like most guys would look way better
• 22:11
  if they just dress. But back to what I was talking
• 22:14
  about at that dungeon, it wasn't the people like in the actual
• 22:18
  like doing the BDSM that took it too seriously.
• 22:22
  But there was this couple that came in and they were new and
• 22:26
  the husband and the wife I guess like he was weird.
• 22:31
  She wasn't. So he's going around like doing
• 22:33
  these scenes with these women and they're not scenes.
• 22:36
  He wants to do foot worship but he has no clue what he's doing.
• 22:40
  So he's fucking slobbering on these girls toes and then at the
• 22:44
  end he's just putting their socks and shoes back on, not
• 22:47
  cleaning it. And then he comes up to me and
• 22:49
  he's like, can I worship your feet?
• 22:51
  I say no, and I'm not a big feet person in general.
• 22:55
  I the most I do is like, you can massage my feet, you can touch
• 22:59
  my feet, but I'm not the biggest fan of having someone's a
• 23:03
  stranger's mouth on my little toes.
• 23:05
  Yeah, I don't like it. I got you.
• 23:06
  But he like gets pissy with me that I said no because I'm in
• 23:11
  these beautiful heels he likes and he ends up throwing a water
• 23:14
  bottle, an empty water bottle at my feet.
• 23:17
  Oh my. God, oh, come on, like that.
• 23:20
  And he's trying to play it off. And I was new and so I was like
• 23:24
  in that space where I was like, it can I?
• 23:28
  Like how mad am I allowed to get?
• 23:30
  Because the bitch and me wanted to start cussing him the fuck
• 23:33
  out. But then the reasonable part of
• 23:35
  me is like, but if they don't perceive that as a big deal,
• 23:38
  then I could be the one getting banned.
• 23:40
  So I didn't really say anything. But obviously what happened was
• 23:43
  he was doing this with all these girls and these girls were
• 23:46
  letting him do it. His wife started doing a scene
• 23:49
  with that guy. I mentioned that the one that
• 23:51
  dressed nice, they're doing a scene and out of nowhere, he ran
• 23:55
  up in that scene and got so mad at that guy for doing a scene
• 23:59
  with his wife. Not like he wasn't sucking every
• 24:02
  toe in the building. Wow.
• 24:04
  So he got so mad at her and caused such a scene that they
• 24:07
  banned both of them on site. And they were in the parking lot
• 24:11
  screaming at each other. And so I, it turns out I didn't
• 24:14
  even have to say anything. And then when I did tell the DM,
• 24:16
  like, Oh yeah, he like, he threw some shit at me.
• 24:18
  They were like, Oh my God. Like you would need to tell us
• 24:20
  like if anything like that happened.
• 24:22
  Have you seen these people again?
• 24:23
  No, they got banned, no. No, no, I'm saying at any other
• 24:26
  events. No, I haven't they I had their
• 24:29
  fat for a second and they do like only fans, but they're not
• 24:33
  they're not like a known couple or anything.
• 24:35
  It was like it was like really crazy.
• 24:37
  Like I was like shocked. And that's the only incident
• 24:40
  I've ever had in a dungeon where a man was like that blatantly
• 24:44
  disrespectful. Like I've had men be
• 24:46
  disrespectful, but just like like throwing something at my
• 24:49
  feet because like you're mad. I won't let you, like, slobber
• 24:52
  on my toes and then put my socks back on with your spit still in
• 24:56
  it. Like, oh, come on, dude.
• 24:58
  And then the fact that he got mad that his wife was doing a
• 25:00
  scene was like crazy because she hadn't done anything all night
• 25:03
  and he had been doing stuff with everybody.
• 25:05
  And then the second she got into scene, it was nuts.
• 25:08
  And you fucking rejected him the last time.
• 25:11
  Oh yeah, I rejected him and then he like in then him doing that
• 25:13
  like followed shortly after. So I don't know if it he got mad
• 25:16
  that he couldn't have his way. And yeah, it sounded like, it
• 25:19
  really does sound like that. Because I'm not trying to be
• 25:22
  rude. At that time I think I was still
• 25:25
  going by switch but I was very Dom leaning.
• 25:28
  But also I don't really play with strangers, I just.
• 25:32
  Don't like it? And you're a girl in your 20s.
• 25:34
  It's not like you're a woman in your 40s.
• 25:37
  Even younger he was like in his 30s.
• 25:39
  Yeah, but like I. Don't know, I'm just my friends
• 25:42
  let him do that. But even my friend was like,
• 25:44
  yeah, when he said foot worship I wasn't fully expecting to get
• 25:47
  my foot face fucked or anything. Like that?
• 25:50
  Yeah, yeah. And you know what that guy was
• 25:52
  wearing? What's the T-shirt and cargo
• 25:54
  shorts? Oh God, I hate that.
• 25:57
  I hate that I. Hate it too.
• 26:00
  I was like, you want to suck my toes looking like that?
• 26:06
  Gross. You know I'm gonna go back to
• 26:08
  this too. The whole fucking thing with
• 26:10
  cargo shorts. Throw the fucking cargo shirt
• 26:12
  you wear. Cargo shorts to the beach, on
• 26:15
  hikes, Do not wear them to an event where I'm supposed to
• 26:18
  think you're sexy, Right. Really.
• 26:21
  It would literally like I it would be like a girl wearing,
• 26:24
  like, basketball shorts. Like, it's the same thing to me.
• 26:28
  Yeah. I'm like, if you would judge a
• 26:29
  woman for wearing like the girl equivalent of what you're
• 26:31
  wearing to a party like this, then don't wear it.
• 26:34
  Like if a girl showed up in a sports bra and AT shirt and then
• 26:36
  some shorts like everybody would like, oh, is she here?
• 26:38
  She's hanging. Yeah, well, that her men would
• 26:41
  be like, oh, look at that. That's different.
• 26:43
  It doesn't take much to place, man.
• 26:45
  It's true. A.
• 26:46
  Warm hole. Yeah, Where's that orifice?
• 26:50
  Can I see the orifice through the shorts?
• 26:51
  If you if you carved a hole in a watermelon, men would line up.
• 26:54
  Oh God, yeah, I made Brie fucking watermelon before.
• 26:56
  That's interesting. I'm going.
• 26:57
  To say that every time you mention Brie.
• 27:03
  I have a video on fat and I I made her fuck a cantaloupe and
• 27:07
  when she was masturbating with the cantaloupe I didn't quite
• 27:11
  catch it on video but when she came the literally the
• 27:15
  cantaloupe exploded with seeds and I was like fuck that melon.
• 27:20
  Fuck that melon, you dirty whore.
• 27:23
  I'm surprised she didn't get a UTI.
• 27:26
  She did not. It was O naturale.
• 27:29
  I'm picky with men because I see what y'all's fingernails look
• 27:32
  like and I'm not kidding. I'm not letting a dirty man
• 27:35
  throw my pH balance off because you don't know how to wash your
• 27:38
  hands. Thank.
• 27:38
  You can we talk about that? Yeah, men get pissed at me
• 27:42
  because I, I reject easily, but it's like I have eyeballs and I
• 27:44
  use them to look at you, so I know what's going on.
• 27:47
  That is my biggest pet peeve is a man with dirty fucking
• 27:51
  fingernails and long fingernails.
• 27:54
  Long is fine if they're maintained.
• 27:56
  If they're maintained, you know, that's because I like golf guys.
• 27:59
  That's the golf in you. Yeah, long nails, as long as you
• 28:03
  maybe got the two lesbian nails going on.
• 28:05
  Two are short, but they're clean, maintained, painted.
• 28:08
  Yes, I love a man with a manicure.
• 28:10
  Yeah, I do. And that's.
• 28:11
  Cool not even in like a like a gay way.
• 28:13
  Like I know masculine men who get their nails painted.
• 28:15
  No, no. And that's cool, but I'm talking
• 28:18
  about just the average guy. You know, dirt caked in it.
• 28:21
  Oh my God, yesterday's come. I can't.
• 28:24
  Oh God. Barbie, please.
• 28:26
  Oh you know what I hate too? What?
• 28:27
  When you see a lot of young guys where they start growing hair
• 28:30
  but they can't grow it well so they just have like 3 pubic
• 28:32
  hairs all over their face. Shave it, babe.
• 28:35
  Shave it, it's done. Shave.
• 28:37
  It till it comes uneven. If I have to shave my beard, you
• 28:41
  gotta shave yours. All right, so, you know, I feel
• 28:44
  like we should give like a man's tip at the end of every show on
• 28:47
  this. You know, it's like I'll.
• 28:49
  Give a man a tip, sorry. Yes you will.
• 28:54
  You like that, Jack? Never tell him I do that.
• 28:58
  You'll. Find it one night.
• 29:01
  You won't. Hi, I'm going to hit him in the
• 29:03
  head really hard. When we find this, we were like
• 29:05
  #1 you know, BDSM podcasts for like 3 months running.
• 29:09
  Yeah. Oh my God, am I famous?
• 29:13
  Not yet. If y'all want to follow me on
• 29:14
  set, I'm the under score Barbie. Feel free to cuss me out there.
• 29:18
  If you don't like me I will read it.
• 29:20
  Might not respond. You know you need an alternate
• 29:25
  account and call yourself the man eater.
• 29:28
  You know that was my number one song on Spotify for like 2 years
• 29:31
  in a. Row.
• 29:31
  See. Did you fucking love that song?
• 29:33
  I'm not even really a man eater 'cause I don't be going through
• 29:35
  them like that, but I do be hurt in men's.
• 29:37
  Feeling Oh my God, that's great. Oh, it's my favorite.
• 29:40
  That's great, so let's give men some tips.
• 29:44
  So manicured nails. No dirt under your fingernails.
• 29:47
  Yeah, I think all these tips just boil down to be clean, look
• 29:53
  like you tried. What about ball hair?
• 29:56
  Are you a fan? You know the few men I have been
• 29:59
  with? Yeah, little sluts.
• 30:01
  They're always clean shaven. I know.
• 30:03
  Thank you. Yeah.
• 30:04
  I don't prefer well, I have like this one guy was like fucking
• 30:07
  for a long time. He, he wasn't always clean
• 30:10
  shaved, but he usually was because that's just what he
• 30:12
  preferred. But the few times he wasn't, it
• 30:14
  was, it wasn't long. It was just like shaved down.
• 30:18
  Because I can't, I don't say shit because I don't shave bald.
• 30:20
  I just kind of I use like a nose hair trimmer from Walmart.
• 30:23
  I just like trim it down because I don't like not having hair.
• 30:26
  I just like a little bit feel like it keeps my pH better.
• 30:29
  Like I know that sounds so stupid, but no.
• 30:31
  No, it's OK. The hair is there for a reason.
• 30:33
  It protects you. But but yeah, I've never been
• 30:36
  with a guy where it's like. And she says that with that cute
• 30:38
  little dimple, A cute little dimper stick.
• 30:42
  I ever sucked. He was like not a hair inside,
• 30:44
  but he was Vietnamese. So I feel like, you know, I feel
• 30:47
  like Asian men don't really have body hair, though.
• 30:49
  You know, I used to date an Asian guy and I'm telling you,
• 30:52
  he was clean shaven everywhere. He didn't really grow body hair.
• 30:55
  Yeah, exactly. But he was cut and buff and he
• 30:57
  had. Oh my God, his balls were like,
• 31:02
  they were like soft marshmallows like but the giant kind and and
• 31:06
  they were just soft and they were perfect for licking and
• 31:09
  sucking because they had no fucking hair on them.
• 31:12
  So fun. It was.
• 31:13
  It was so fun. They were like soft little
• 31:15
  marshmallows. When you asked me about ball
• 31:17
  hair, it I was like, Oh yeah, balls do grow hair.
• 31:19
  The men they do. The men I'm in, the men I
• 31:21
  entertain just are clean like that.
• 31:23
  Right. Yeah, some men shave your shit.
• 31:27
  Make it look manicured at least. Like like, like you tried, like
• 31:31
  you look down there for you. Yeah, yeah.
• 31:35
  You know what's weird about the Like how I said that was the
• 31:37
  first Dick I sucked. You know I sucked a Dick before
• 31:40
  my first kiss. Oh wow, yeah.
• 31:43
  And you know what's crazy? What's that?
• 31:45
  It was like a year apart. Holy shit it was.
• 31:51
  So crazy. Wow, I don't I.
• 31:53
  Don't know. OK, so it was a really stupid,
• 31:55
  like story, but I was on a date with this guy and I was like, I
• 32:01
  was 19. I think I get the timeline
• 32:03
  confused because it's been a while.
• 32:04
  I think I was 19 and I was on the scene with this guy and I
• 32:07
  was going good. And I mentioned I was like, you
• 32:10
  know, I'm like, you know, I'm a virgin.
• 32:11
  Of course, eyes light up. Men love when they find out
• 32:14
  you're a virgin. And little did he know I was.
• 32:17
  I'm a prude, you know? And so we get in his car, and
• 32:21
  this is the middle of the day. This isn't even, like, night
• 32:24
  time. And we didn't even do anything
• 32:25
  sexy. Like, we were at a coffee shop
• 32:27
  and we're in the car and we're just talking about things.
• 32:29
  He was like, well, you know, do you wanna try anything?
• 32:33
  And I was like, yeah, no, sure. Like I was being, like, really
• 32:37
  nice about it. I was really nervous because,
• 32:39
  you know what? I assumed he was gonna kiss me.
• 32:41
  Yeah. And he goes, That would be a
• 32:42
  good assumption. Are you sure?
• 32:44
  And I was like, yeah. And then he goes, are you?
• 32:45
  Are you positive? I said yeah.
• 32:47
  Whips his penis out and I was like, oh, wasn't expecting that.
• 32:55
  But then in my my brain went got to see it through fuck it, guess
• 33:00
  it. And then so I started like
• 33:02
  touching it and then he's like you can put your mouth on it and
• 33:04
  my brain also like you can put your mouth.
• 33:05
  I know, bitch. Like.
• 33:09
  So I start, I start doing it and it's fine.
• 33:11
  And he's like, Are you sure this is your first time doing this?
• 33:13
  I was like, yeah. And and then it took so long.
• 33:18
  I sat up in the middle of it and had long acrylics on.
• 33:21
  I start typing on my phone. Literally all he's hearing is
• 33:25
  because I'm just texting my friends because he wanted to
• 33:27
  stop because somebody was walking by.
• 33:29
  And then I start doing it again. And I sit up and I go, are you
• 33:31
  almost done? I do not want to do this all day
• 33:33
  because it was taking like almost 30 minutes.
• 33:35
  And that was pissing me off. And he was like, well, you know,
• 33:40
  I've never come from just a blowjob.
• 33:42
  I usually end up having sex. And I looked into and I said,
• 33:44
  well, you're not having sex with me.
• 33:47
  Oh my God, I was like. That's OK.
• 33:49
  Little 19 year old Barbie didn't even know.
• 33:51
  She was like a Dom yet. And she was like over here being
• 33:53
  so mean to him. And then at the end he was, I
• 33:56
  was texting my friends. He's like, are you telling all
• 33:58
  your friends about it? I don't want?
• 33:59
  Probably not. I told my friends my girl,
• 34:03
  you're going to haunt his memory for a while, right?
• 34:06
  And then like, and then I just didn't like end up doing
• 34:10
  anything. And then like a year later, I
• 34:11
  think at like an anime convention I was at, I was, I
• 34:15
  don't know if it counts because I was like performing, but a
• 34:18
  girl in the audience dared me to kiss her.
• 34:21
  And that was technically my first kiss was me and cosplay at
• 34:24
  anime convention. So I didn't have like a first
• 34:26
  like kissing somebody until like actually like maybe like two
• 34:29
  more years later, like on my own accord.
• 34:32
  So it's just really funny though.
• 34:34
  That is awesome. I.
• 34:35
  Know random story with Barbie? Wow, that's awesome.
• 34:39
  Hey, that's OK. So we're back to the tips.
• 34:42
  Yeah. You're gonna give some guys some
• 34:44
  tips. Yeah.
• 34:45
  Effort the bar is in hell for men all of our tips are like be
• 34:50
  clean be nice, be respectful the bar is in hell it's.
• 34:57
  Not, you know, and and women what we have to do, we have to
• 35:00
  fucking wax, pluck, shave, makeup, color hair.
• 35:05
  Yeah. I mean, electrolysis.
• 35:08
  I mean, we do all these things, we have to fucking wear a bra.
• 35:11
  Who the fuck wants to wear a bra?
• 35:14
  No. Yeah, it's fucking miserable.
• 35:18
  I paid too much to get my nipples pierced for you not to
• 35:20
  see it. I love it.
• 35:25
  The first time I was at your party was the Barbie party, and
• 35:28
  John had come up to me and my friend because we were in the
• 35:30
  back and you have whatever was going on back there.
• 35:34
  That bed had deflated and we were trying to do a scene on it.
• 35:36
  So it's just a thing of plastic. So we needed some blankets and
• 35:39
  John was talking to me and then just he went, Your nipples are
• 35:42
  pierced. Can we look down real quick?
• 35:45
  And I was like, they are because I was just like in a Lacy bra.
• 35:49
  So, So what gauges do you have? Do you have are they?
• 35:52
  Are they little? No, it's the standard 14.
• 35:55
  Oh, OK. I I don't have big giant ones or
• 35:57
  nothing like that. It's the same size as like this.
• 36:00
  The ones in my face. Oh, OK, that's actually
• 36:03
  interchangeable. So do you have the Hoo Ha Pierce
• 36:05
  as well? No.
• 36:06
  OK. No, I'm scared of that.
• 36:09
  Well, a lot of people say the clitoral the actual I heard it's
• 36:12
  a 5050. Chance of losing feeling.
• 36:14
  Oh God no. Well, don't risk that.
• 36:16
  I. Thought about getting a Chelsea
• 36:18
  which isn't the clip but it's right above it.
• 36:20
  But then not just. The hood.
• 36:22
  Not the hood. It's like the, oh, sorry, it's
• 36:25
  the skin above it. So it's like, it's like more of
• 36:28
  like above it. But I didn't want to do that
• 36:31
  because the idea of like hair maintenance around a piercing.
• 36:35
  Really annoying. I have 35 piercings but they're
• 36:37
  all like chest and up. Yeah.
• 36:40
  I get that question a lot, but no I'm too scared to get my
• 36:43
  pussy. I was just curious.
• 36:44
  I mean, you brought up Bedazzled.
• 36:47
  Fuck me. All right, girls, girls who do
• 36:50
  that are braver than I. OK, we're done.
• 36:54
  Leah's going to fire me guys. Leave a comment if you want me
• 36:58
  to have a job. All right, now your fucking
• 37:02
  fantasies become. Reality.
• 37:04
  Shut the fuck up.