Latest / Arrivals: A Birth Story Podcast / Two hospital births, a home birth, PROM, becoming a doula and the importance of choosing a care team

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Two hospital births, a home birth, PROM, becoming a doula and the importance of choosing a care team · Arrivals: A Birth Story Podcast

• Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yes, totally. Yes. No pressure at all. ⁓ okay. Amazing. Well, welcome to the arrivals podcast. I'm your host, Merelise Wilson. And today I'm very, very excited to have Ann Morris with me. is a doula, a birth and postpartum doula as well as a childbirth educator. And I'm so excited ⁓ speak to you about your, obviously what you do professionally, but, ⁓ first and foremost, your three babies and their birth. Ann Morris: Yeah, thank you so much again for having me, Marylis. This is so fun. I'm like obsessed with talking about birth. and as I, I'm pretty sure you are too. So this should be a really fun conversation. Merelise Wilson: Yes, absolutely right there with you. how old is your oldest? Ann Morris: ⁓ my gosh, he's actually going to be celebrating his eighth birthday on the 31st of March, so I don't know when this is coming out, but yeah, he's almost eight. Merelise Wilson: ⁓ my goodness. ⁓ well happy early birthday, buddy. Ann Morris: I know, I can't believe it. It's like honestly really hard to believe that I have been almost eight years old. So it's wild, it goes by so fast. Merelise Wilson: And then you have a baby too. So you've got a, yeah, you've got a big spread. Ann Morris: Yeah, yeah, so we have an almost eight year old, a three and a half year old, two boys, and then the youngest is a girl. She's 15 months. Merelise Wilson: ⁓ my youngest is 18 months, so I'm right there with you. It's a hard age. Ann Morris: Okay. Yeah, it's definitely interesting. It's that age where they're just so curious. They get into everything. So you really have to be on your toes at all times because yeah, she and she is fast. She's trying to keep up with those two older brothers all the time. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Exactly, all right. So big bro number one. So what was his birth experience like? And if there's anything too you want to share about his pregnancy, Ann Morris: So let's see. I got pregnant in 2017 for the first time. I had no idea about anything. This was before I became a doula, before I became a childbirth educator. And so I did what I feel like most people do. I went on Google, typed in, know, like OBGYN near me. I was living in New York City at the time. And so, you know, I read some reviews and found one that was close by within walking distance, because you walk everywhere in New York. Merelise Wilson: Mm. Ann Morris: And ⁓ just had like a really normal textbook pregnancy. I did all the routine ultrasounds. I had ⁓ all my normal visits and everything was really smooth sailing. ⁓ I didn't deal with really many symptoms or anything like that. So very, very blessed. I ended up hearing about a childbirth. educator that was located in Astoria, Queens ⁓ in my third trimester because I was actually working as a teacher at the time and one of my co-workers told me about this class and I decided to go because I really wanted to have an unmedicated birth and so me and my husband went and it was at that class that I actually heard the word doula for the first time and my ears kind of perked up and I was like, ⁓ I think I need one of those for my birth because, you know, I'm trying to go unmedicated. I'm trying to avoid any unnecessary interventions. And so thankfully I was able to find a doula that late in pregnancy and she was so wonderful. I ended up going into labor the night before my due date. And so it was around like 10 PM. I started to feel, you know, a little crampy, you know, nothing too intense right away. But I remember I was like trying to remember the things I had learned in my class. And, you know, I was told, you know, if it's nighttime, like, try to stay in bed as long as possible. And so that's what I did. And, but very quickly, like I realized like I couldn't lay down, like I was very uncomfortable laying down. And so I was kind of doing like hands and knees in the bed and like, you know, just kind of like trying to change like positions and things like that. And I was on the phone with my doula and she was, you know, kind of like coaching me through some of the contractions. And I'd also heard all the stories of like first time moms taking forever. And so I was like, ⁓ I'm going to be here a while. like, you know, just. Merelise Wilson: Hmm. Right? Ann Morris: help me over the phone and then when I really feel like I need your support, then you can join us in person. Merelise Wilson: Did you have a kind of plan knowing that you wanted to go unmedicated? Well, actually two questions. Do you remember at the time why you wanted to go unmedicated, kind of what your goal was there? And then also, did you have a plan for at some point, like the doula would meet you at your house and then the hospital or just meet you straight at the hospital? So two questions there. Ann Morris: Yeah. Yeah. So kind of like I said, like I didn't know too much about birth prior. I just knew that like my personality and like the way that I try to like live my life is like, I try to not do anything extra medical wise, like if it's not necessary. And so I just, you know, and going to that class really affirmed that, that like sometimes the interventions that, you know, care providers can offer to you during labor, like they're not always like, helpful or can be ⁓ necessarily ⁓ beneficial to you or your baby, right? Like long term. ⁓ And so just hearing all of that, I just knew that was kind of my why of wanting to go on Medicaid. I wasn't trying to prove anything, just wanted to see if I could do it. And I knew that if I needed medical intervention or pain management, that I could get it, right? I was having the baby in the hospital. Those things would be readily available to me, but I just knew I wanted to try, at least. And then in regards to having my doula, the plan was for her to come to the apartment first and then we would go to the hospital together. ⁓ And so, yeah, but like very soon after, like I realized like there's no way I was gonna be able to continue laboring in bed because I was just so uncomfortable. And so I got up out of bed, it's probably like around like midnight, maybe like one. ⁓ And I went over to the shower, cause I'd heard that like, you know, water is nature's epidural. And so. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Okay. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: I got in that shower, had my worship music on. It was just kinda like moving right along. ⁓ Clearly inactive labor at this point because I was starting to need to use vocalization, but I'd never been through labor before. So I didn't really understand what that whole process really looked like or really felt like, know, because I'd never felt it before either. And so I guess I have maybe a high-ish pain tolerance. ⁓ Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: And so I was just rocking and rolling. My husband was there with me, supporting me. ⁓ I at one point got out of the shower to like use the restroom. I now know, you know, almost eight years later, hindsight is 20, 20, right? I now know that what I felt when I went to like wipe was my baby's bulging bag of waters. ⁓ But when I felt that, it completely freaked me out. Merelise Wilson: Wow. Ann Morris: because I literally thought it was my baby's head. And so I was like, oh my gosh, this is crazy. I don't think I can walk, because we lived in a third floor walk up. And so I was imagining all the steps I had to take to go downstairs and then get in the car, walk to the car, because again, New York City, the parking's not right outside. You got to walk to your car. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Uh-huh. Right? Ann Morris: And so I'm just envisioning this. like, there's no way, there's no way I'm gonna be able to do all that. And so I was like, I think we need to call an ambulance. There's no way I'm gonna be able to walk myself to the hospital, or walk and drive myself to the hospital. And at this point, I'm probably transitioning. So there's also that heightened sense of fight or flight during that time. And so clearly, again, in the moment, I did not know that, but my labor was moving really, really fast. And so my husband ends up calling an ambulance. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: I ended up taking an ambulance ride for the first time in my life to the hospital. And yeah, I showed up, they did a cervical check and they were like, all right, you ready to your baby? I was like, I guess, like I was 10 centimeters dilated, ready to push. And I literally pushed three times and he was born. And so. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Did your water break while you were pushing or? Ann Morris: ⁓ I think at some point in all of that, I honestly do not remember like with that first time around, like when my water broke. ⁓ I just know that like at some point it did and I, I didn't like, it wasn't like a big sensation or like popping like feeling or anything like that. ⁓ so I imagine maybe it broke like as I was pushing or maybe even they did it. yeah. So I pushed way too hard. ⁓ way too hard. had a second degree tear. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. right? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Ann Morris: Um, and yeah, I should have probably just like waited on my body to feel like the urge to push. Cause I didn't feel the urge to push. I was just told I was 10 centimeters dilated and like, I was ready to go. And so in all the midst of that, my doula did end up making it to the hospital. Um, she was so wonderful and reassuring. She like put like some like cool washcloths on my, you know, forehead on my neck and stuff. And it was just like, so encouraging, got some amazing pictures of like, uh, you know, in those first moments, but, um, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yep. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: Yeah, just looking back, it was just so much faster than I could have imagined for a first time mom. Start to finish, it was probably about five hours, or no, sorry, seven hours, because it started around 10, and he was born around five, or 5'10", or something like that. So yeah, I went from zero to 60 really, really fast. So yeah, that was my first son's birth. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Wow. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it sounds like that. ⁓ my gosh. So you said you pushed three times, way too hard. What was your recovery like with some of the, you said you did tear? Yeah. Ann Morris: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I had a second degree tear, which is like the most common tear for like a first time mom, which I've learned now that I'm in this space. ⁓ That is like the most common tear that I do see. ⁓ But like I said, mean, yeah, I just pushed way too hard. was not feeling the urge to push. ⁓ And so, yeah, it was kind of unfortunate. But anyway, you live and you learn. My recovery was fine. Yeah, I feel like. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Ann Morris: I experienced like minimal bleeding. ⁓ I know like I would try to like listen to my body. And so if I started like bleeding more heavily, like on a certain day, I would like try to take it easy. But yeah, it wasn't, it wasn't too complicated. I feel like, yeah, looking back. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. That's wild for a first time birth for it to happen that quickly. I mean, you know, I always say like, if you're trying to go unmedicated, it is usually a blessing if you have a fast labor and birth, you know? I mean, there can be some downsides to it, of course, as I'm sure you know. But I guess probably for you for a first time mom who wanted to do it on Medicaid or low intervention, you were like, boom, like box checked. Ann Morris: Mm-hmm. Yeah, I mean, definitely looking back for sure, I was grateful that like it went the way it did. You know, I just feel like birth is always like so unpredictable. Like you can never predict how it's going to go. Right. ⁓ But yeah, I definitely was grateful that like it was just, you know, smooth and like it just progressed well. And yeah, for the sake of me going unmedicated. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: So should I jump into my second birth? Merelise Wilson: Yes, go for it. Ann Morris: Okay, okay, so for, so there was about four years in between my first son being born and my second son being born. And so during that time is actually when I first started my doula practice. So ⁓ when my first son was about three months postpartum, I decided to start like Googling like how to become a birth doula and how to become a postpartum doula because I just had Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Ann Morris: such a great experience, like postpartum, and just realize like how much support that I had. It was such a blessing. And like, I just knew that like a lot of families like probably don't have that kind of support. And so I was like, I want to be able to like be that for somebody, you know, ⁓ in this really like vulnerable and like sacred and like raw time of their life, you know? And so, ⁓ yeah, I started to pursue that. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Ann Morris: I ended up taking a postpartum doula training first, ⁓ around, like I said, about three months postpartum. And then I took the birth doula training probably about a year later. ⁓ And so, I just wanted to be able to serve families during the entirety of their experience, right? Through pregnancy and then birth and then postpartum to give that continuity of care. And so, ⁓ yeah, so I started working with families right away. Merelise Wilson: Okay. Wow. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: And as a doula, like the type of birth that I really loved supporting the most was home birth. And so I like kind of took like mental notes, you know, of like, ⁓ like when I get pregnant again, I would like to do a home birth the second time around. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. supporting home births you were drawn to? Ann Morris: I loved how intimate it was. I loved the type of care that midwives offer and how they look at you as a whole person and not just a patient that's sick and needs to be fixed, which I of felt that way with the medical model of care. And they just view birth in a physiological sense. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: I feel like they tend to trust birth more and just allow it to unfold and they intervene when they need to, but for the most part are typically like pretty hands off and just allow, you know, God's design to just unfold as it does when it's left alone. And so I just loved that. yeah, so I, and I knew too, like who I would like to have as my team as well. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: ⁓ I was like so excited to like go that journey again, but just with like a different lens this time around and with different ⁓ support. And so, ⁓ yeah. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. It's really cool. I was gonna say, I feel like a lot of times the barrier to home birth for a lot of women is just not knowing what to expect or fear in some cases ⁓ is a broad word, but it's so cool that you got to witness. home birth in your capacity as a doula first and really like probably get so comfortable with it before you decided to approach it as the plan for your own birth. So that's a really I feel like cool unique experience that you got to have. Ann Morris: Yeah, for sure. I mean, I feel like there's so many, like I said, birth is so unpredictable anyway, that like, I knew like with where we lived, like our major hospital was like five minutes down the street. Like you could probably actually get there even faster than that, like if you wanted to. And so I knew that like we had access to that if we needed it, but like I just, I felt really comfortable and confident in the team that I had that like they would help me make that decision. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: to transfer if that was needed in the moment. I was very open to that. was never like, just like being a doula, know? Cause I know that things happen in birth and you can plan for birth, but you can't plan the actual thing. so, yeah, I tried to hold my plans really loosely and while also hoping for the best, but also having my plan B and my plan C in the back of my mind if I needed to. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that makes perfect sense. Ann Morris: Yeah. So it was really lovely to walk through my pregnancy with midwives the second time around. My appointments were like 45 minutes to an hour long. I was encouraged to ask questions, to understand my body, my physiology, nutrition, like all the things. I learned so much. I was encouraged to like bring my son if I needed to, who was now like three, three and a half at the time. And so... Merelise Wilson: well. Ann Morris: Yeah, that was really cool. And my husband came to all the appointments and it was just like a really wonderful, like, homey atmosphere. ⁓ And so, yeah, with my second, we didn't find out the gender, which is really fun. I the gender at my first. Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. I love it. I'm team surprise, so I love it. Ann Morris: Yes, so fun. So let's see. I was really hoping that I'd go into labor in the evening again, because, you know, obviously we have a child now. And so was hoping that like he'd be able to be asleep and then, you know, I could, you know, kind of just start rocking and rolling. And so that is what ended up happening. It was the day before, wait, was it the day before or day after? I can't remember. It was... Yeah, around my son's due date. I think he was born on his due date. I'm like, sorry, kind of blanking right now. ⁓ Yeah, so both of them, both of them were born like on or like right around their due dates. ⁓ And so I'll backtrack, I'll backtrack a little bit. So I remember I went to my like 39 week appointment and ⁓ my midwife, like she was like palpating my belly like she always does. And she was like, ⁓ yeah, like your baby's not quite engaged yet. ⁓ But you could do a few things like encourage Merelise Wilson: ⁓ cool. so unusual. Ann Morris: him or her to get engaged. And so I went home that week and I did all those things that she recommended. And so she said to do deep squats, high knees. She told me to do an inversion every day. Do know what that is? Like off the couch? Yeah. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah, where you just hang off backwards off the back of the couch or side of the couch. Ann Morris: ⁓ Yeah, well not quite backwards, but you're like head down and you're like on your elbows like supporting you with your your butt up high. ⁓ And so I did all of those things and then my chiropractor told me to do like a few other things. between all of that, once I had my 40 week appointment, ⁓ she like touched my belly again. She was like, ⁓ yeah, this baby's like ready. And at that time I actually thought like, Merelise Wilson: Okay. Okay. Got it, got it. Locked and loaded. Ann Morris: intuitively that like I was going to be going into labor soon at my 40 week appointment just because I had lost my mucus plug that morning. ⁓ And so I told her, was like, yeah, I think it could be like sooner rather than later. And I remember she had like a really overdue mom and she was like, okay, just wait until like my overdue mom goes, okay? And then you can go. And I was like, ⁓ sure. And like, yeah, of course. Like I think it was like later that evening. ⁓ I actually, it was when I went into labor. So ⁓ it was... Like 7.30 we put our son to sleep. ⁓ And then I told my husband, was like, I think it's gonna be soon. So like, I'm kind of just gonna start to retreat into our little little birth cave. We had the birth pool like all like blown up and ready to go. We just needed to like put the tarp down and like, you know, top it off with some air. ⁓ But yeah, I was. Merelise Wilson: What made you feel like it was gonna be soon? Were you having like just the mucus plug or was it just a feeling? Ann Morris: No, was starting to have inconsistent contractions throughout the day. And yes, just was very crampy in the morning and then started having inconsistent contractions. I just like, I'm a very like, when I'm in labor, I tend to really deny it until I really can't deny it anymore. And so with me having a home birth, I was just like, we're cool, we're good. We went out to dinner that day. I wasn't like, I wasn't paying attention to it until I really needed to pay attention to it. And so I kind of kept like brushing it off, brushing it off, brushing it off. But I was like, no, like you go put him to bed. I'll go like start to kind of focus on these. Cause they're starting to like need my attention more. And so it's like my coping skill, think, or my coping mechanism, just denial. Yeah. And so, yeah, I would just kind of retreated, went into our room and had my balm, had my worship. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Denial. Ann Morris: playlist on had my Christian Hypno birthing as well. I love that resource if your listeners aren't familiar with it. You should totally check it out. ⁓ And yeah, I was just rocking and rolling. I ⁓ remember like, I told my husband at one point, like, I think we have more time, like we're good. I was timing the contractions. And then I remember like the next contraction after that. He was like, I think I'm gonna call Kristen. And I was like, Okay, fine. Just call Kristen. And so he like calls our midwife and ⁓ you know, again, I'm still like kind of in denial, but like he's it's not his first rodeo. So he knows. I like to call him my mula, my like mandula ⁓ for the second. Yeah, yeah. For my second and for my third, he I didn't have like an actual doula. just I had my mula. So ⁓ and so yeah, he calls the midwife and he was like, ⁓ you know, Anson Labor. She was like, okay, like, do you think like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. I always say that about my husband too, yes. Ann Morris: we should come and he was like, and he asked me, like, do you think she should come? And I was like, no, not yet. Like we're good. And I didn't know this, but she had already like started packing her stuff after that. Cause like second time moms like tend to go quicker than first time moms. And so I also had a, yeah, that's true. That's true. And she knew that. And so, and we also had a birth photographer. So he made all the calls and Merelise Wilson: Yeah. And your first wasn't slow. Yeah. ⁓ Ann Morris: About 15 minutes later, he called them back and was like, yeah, I think we're ready for you guys to come. so, ⁓ thankfully they both had already started getting ready. ⁓ so, birth photographer came first, then the birth assistant, and then the midwife. And it was just beautiful. It was such a holy moment. We just had worship going. Everybody was kind of worshiping together. We had the birth pool getting filled up. ⁓ when I got into the pool, my water broke within five minutes. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: of me getting in the pool because I think I was finally able to just like fully relax. And ⁓ my midwife kind of noticed I was like a little uncomfortable. And so she asked my husband if he would get in with me to kind of like support me from behind, which was really helpful. We hadn't planned on that, but in the moment it was just like a perfect idea. I'm so glad she suggested that. ⁓ And so he got like behind me. No, no, no, he was like, he was ready to go. He like just. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Was he hesitant or was he like, no, let's do it? Ann Morris: put on some board shorts and was like there for it. ⁓ And so, yeah, baby was born about 45 minutes after my water broke in the water. I just, knew I wanted to take it slower this time around and I wanted to like allow my body to like just do the work. I didn't want to tear, you know, I just knew that like if I slowed that process down and just like really like worked with my body that I could minimize tearing. And so that's what we did. And he was born and... Merelise Wilson: That's awesome. Ann Morris: Let me see, how did we announce the gender that time? He came out and I remember I saw his man parts when the midwife handed him to me and I was like, oh, it's a boy. And I was so ecstatic and just overwhelmed with joy that he was here. And so, yeah, that was my second birth. it was... Merelise Wilson: Yeah Ann Morris: really beautiful. loved being in the water. The water was so helpful. ⁓ I didn't labor in water this time around just because I knew I'd be getting in like the tub and kind of just like wanted to save that for like my last like my last resort. And so I'm so glad I did. And ⁓ yeah, I didn't tear. Thank God. ⁓ And yeah, he was healthy. I'm so thankful that I had such a great team for my home birth. And yeah, I'd recommend home birth to Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: anybody as long as you're you low risk and your baby's healthy. ⁓ I highly recommend it because it was such a wonderful experience for me. Merelise Wilson: for her. That's incredible. So did you end up delivering kind of like sitting up leaning back in your husband's arms? ⁓ that's so cool. Ann Morris: Yes. Yep. I tried doing like hands and knees in the tub, like leaning like over the side, but I was not comfortable in that position. And like my midwife, like that's when she recommended like, why don't you turn around and like have your husband like support you from behind? Cause like she knew that that position can sometimes be more comfortable for women. And so yeah, that's how, that's how I ended up having him. And at, and at the very last second, I remember they told me like, cause I think at the last second, cause it's so intense, right? I started to like fight it. And so I, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: my, I started to like lift my hips up and she was like, if you lift your hips up anymore, you're not going to be able to have your baby in the water. So you got to lower your hips back down. And so I did that. It took every ounce of like self control to do that. Cause I was, you know, I was almost trying to like fight it, but then I had to like really just like surrender in those final moments. And then I like went back down in the water and then he was born. So, ⁓ yeah. Merelise Wilson: Uh-huh. Yeah. Yes. Do feel like you were fighting like the fetal ejection reflex almost or like, or just like fighting like the push? Ann Morris: I don't know. I always find pushing to be the absolute hardest part at the very end. I find contractions to be fine, but then at the end, like the pushing part is when I just regret all of my life's decisions to do it unmedicated. yeah, yeah, I just, find that end part to be the worst. So yeah, I think I was just fighting it. Really? Yeah, I know. It's so funny. Merelise Wilson: ⁓ really? Really? I'm the reverse. That's so interesting. Yeah, I'm the reverse. ⁓ yeah. Pushing is a relief for me. It's like the laboring. Well, it sounds like you have a pretty fast like labor in general, but for me, it's like the the unknown of how long labor is going to last and like not knowing how many more of these contractions I'm going to have to like have. And pushing has always been such a relief for me because it's like the end is in sight. I know that there's only like, you know, a certain number of more of these I'm going to have to do. And yeah, I don't know. That was always more. That was easier for me, but I totally can see how it'd be different. Ann Morris: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Merelise Wilson: it. Ann Morris: Yeah, no, I hear you. I feel like I hear mixed reviews on that. I would say I probably hear more people like on your side of things for sure, because you're able to feel like you're doing something like to like help the process when you're pushing. But yeah, I just find it to be so intense. Like that feeling like of like that pressure. Yeah, probably. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. probably depends on the size of your baby too. I've always had pretty like, my babies were like 6'11 and 6'14, so not big by any means. So I imagine if you're pushing out a 10 pound baby or something in the bigger range, then maybe the pushing is less of a relief. Ann Morris: Mm. Mm, yeah, I can imagine that too, yeah, for sure. Merelise Wilson: how big were your babies? Ann Morris: My first was 7'1", my second was 8'4", and then my third, my daughter, was our smallest, 6'15". Merelise Wilson: Okay. Okay. all over the place. Ann Morris: All over the place. Merelise Wilson: That's so funny and I feel like you usually don't hear the third being the smallest. You know, I feel like they usually get progressively bigger. Ann Morris: I know. Yeah, I know. It's so interesting. All their births were, you know, ⁓ different some ways, similar in some ways, but yeah, all of them weighed, you know, ⁓ different. So Yeah. ⁓ Merelise Wilson: That's wild. So you had the birth of your dreams. It was amazing. ⁓ Water birth at home, healthy baby boy, easy recovery. And then you waited a few years and then you got pregnant again. Ann Morris: Yeah, and funny enough, so we've had all three of our kids in different states. So my first son was born in New York, my second son was born in Florida, and then my third, our daughter, was born here in Georgia, which is where I live now. ⁓ And so I started to feel the itch to have another baby when our second son turned 18 months. It was around the time when we weaned, and so after that I was like, okay, I think I could do this again. And so... ⁓ Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Okay. down. Ann Morris: I really desire to have another home birth. ⁓ Unfortunately, here in Georgia, our midwives are not ⁓ licensed in the state of Georgia yet. We're one of like eight or nine states left ⁓ where home birth midwives don't or can't hold licensure. ⁓ And so because of that, ⁓ access to home birth midwifery care is not as accessible as it is in other states. In other states, sometimes home birth midwives can take insurance. ⁓ Here in Georgia, that's not the case. Merelise Wilson: Mm. Ann Morris: And so you have to pay out of pocket and just like kind of where we were at financially at the time like just couldn't make it work unfortunately because we do have incredible home birth midwives in the area that I'm in and so ⁓ that was definitely like the model of care that I was really hoping to have this third time around but just you know Circumstantially just wasn't able to make it happen. And so Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: ⁓ As a result, I ended up reaching out to one of the care providers that I really respect in this area. ⁓ Her name is Carson Reagan and she is with OB2Me. And I reached out to her and kind of like shared like my situation and also like my hopes for like, you know, my pregnancy and my birth. ⁓ she recommended Providence, which I had. Merelise Wilson: you Ann Morris: heard of and worked with as a doula and so I knew they had a good reputation in this area. Have you heard of them before, Marilise? Okay. Merelise Wilson: don't think so. it, Providence is the name of the OB practice? Or the midwife practice? Ann Morris: Yeah, it's Providence Women's Care. And so Providence is a good option for kind of like women in my position, I guess, because ⁓ you could birth in the hospital, but you had the option of having a water birth, ⁓ which is like kind of unheard of in the hospital setting. And so in my mind, I'm like, okay, well, I can't necessarily have a home birth this time around, but I could have a water birth in the hospital. And so Merelise Wilson: Yeah, it is. Ann Morris: That to me sounded like a good, you know, happy medium. And so... ⁓ Merelise Wilson: Did you consider a birth center or is that also kind of like cost prohibitive? Ann Morris: No, actually, we have an amazing birth center here. I just wasn't able to because unfortunately it was like too late in pregnancy for me to switch. yeah. But yeah, the Atlanta Birth Center here in Atlanta is incredible and they do take insurance. So that is a great option for ⁓ for also women who might be like in a similar predicament. ⁓ And so, yeah, I ended up going with Providence and the plan was to have my baby at WellStar North Fulton, which is in Roswell, Georgia. Merelise Wilson: yeah. Yeah. Okay. Mm-hmm. Uh-huh. Ann Morris: ⁓ I live over in Lawrenceville, is about, it depends on traffic, but it could take you like 40 minutes to get there, give or take. And so I knew we were kind of like, you know, playing with fire with this plan, but I really couldn't think of a better one, honestly. So after kind of going through all my options, I was like, all right, well, this is the best plan we got. that's what we did. And so, you know, I had a normal pregnancy again, you know, thank God, ⁓ you know, nothing, no complications. Merelise Wilson: Okay. Yeah. Ann Morris: I will say this, I had an ultrasound around 37 weeks and baby was like posterior. And so I like reached out to some friends and, you know, asked for advice and like things I could do. Obviously like, I mean, I know things I could do, but I wanted like more, you know, advice and wisdom from other women about ways to like get my baby to be in a more optimal position for birth. ⁓ And so I did, ⁓ you know, some of the suggestions like Robozo and... Merelise Wilson: Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: things like ⁓ on my left side and ⁓ just doing different things like that. ⁓ And ⁓ ended up getting, ⁓ like she would like measure my belly at every appointment, you know, like when they measure your fundal height. And I remember around like 39 weeks, she ⁓ my belly and she was like, so I think I want to do like another like ultrasound, like maybe next week if you haven't had your baby yet, just because like. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: I am seeing like there hasn't been much of a difference in like the baby's growth between like last week and this week. And in my head I'm like, okay, I intuitively felt like she was fine. I didn't know it was a she also, we were waiting to find out gender again. But I intuitively felt like the baby was fine. And so she recommended, know, I don't know, like another scan, like the next appointment or whatever. And like, I remember like in my head I was like, probably not gonna do that, but. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: We'll see how I feel once it gets closer. Well, thankfully I didn't need to even worry about that because at 39 and one, ⁓ this was my daughter was due right before Christmas. And so we ⁓ went Christmas caroling ⁓ on a Friday with some church friends. went, we walked a lot that day. And then after that we went to a friend's Merelise Wilson: Yeah Yeah. Ann Morris: daughter's birthday party for her one-year-old. And so that was really fun. We were in good spirits. It was like Christmas themed. And I got home and laid in bed and me and my husband, we like pray together every night. And so I remember we like getting ready to pray and my water broke. And I was like, ⁓ this has never happened before. Like, cause I wasn't in labor. And so I was like, ⁓ my goodness. And so, you know, got cleaned up or whatever. Of course, like nothing is packed. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: ⁓ we, you know, as a, as a doula, I'm like, I know I should have done this like weeks ago, but like, did it happen? No. ⁓ and so we're like frantically, you know, it's like late at night. We're like frantically like, you know, getting stuff together. Cause like, I'm thinking, you know, okay, my water broke. I'm probably going to go into labor. If I go to sleep, my body will just wake me up and I'll be in labor. ⁓ so we get all of our things kind of organized and situated and finally go to sleep and. Merelise Wilson: Third baby. No. Ann Morris: I wake up the next morning, no contractions. yeah, I know. I was feeling, it broke around 11, so maybe like, I don't know. Okay, let's say 12 hours. So, you 11 a.m. I'm feeling like a little crampy, but like no contractions. I was starting to like, maybe like lose my mucus plug a little bit, but I was like, interesting. Okay, well, we'll just kind of wait and see. I remember, so my mom who lives in Florida, Merelise Wilson: ⁓ wow. So how many hours had it been? Okay. Okay. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: She was scheduled to fly in that Tuesday, ⁓ which was a little bit closer to like my due date, because she was going to help us with our two older children when we had the baby. And so ⁓ I called her that day and I was like, hey, like, is there any way you could switch your flight to today? ⁓ Because my water broke last night. And I think I would have like a lot more peace and maybe my body would just be able to relax if like you were here knowing I have childcare. ⁓ Merelise Wilson: to right now. Yeah. Totally. Ann Morris: And so we had reached out to some church friends just in case things happen, but like I just, wanted her here. And so thankfully she was able to switch her flight. She came in. ⁓ My husband went and like picked her up at the airport and I was able to just like, you know, go for a walk in our neighborhood. And I was listening to like positive birth story podcasts. If I knew about yours, I'd be listening to yours, Marilies. ⁓ And you know, it's just really trying to like get into a good head space and not like start spiraling and freaking out because I wasn't going into labor. ⁓ Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: And so I reached out to a midwife friend of mine who lives locally. I wanted to get her like input on the situation. She's a home birth midwife. I knew if I called my practice, they would tell me to come in right away, because that's typical, typical standard of care. And so I reached out to somebody who's like, I think a little bit more on like that holistic mindset of things. And she sent me over this like document and it was basically like a protocol for like premature rupture of membranes. That's what it's called. Merelise Wilson: Right, right. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Prom, for short. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: ⁓ or like pre-labor, or like, yeah, exactly, or like pre-labor rupture membranes. ⁓ And so she sent it over to me and I can share it with you. It's actually really a great resource that I share with a lot of my clients ⁓ now because it just really helps you kind of like take ownership of like, you your care, like while you're still waiting for like things to progress. And so I would monitor my temperature every four hours. I was taking a high dose vitamin C. Merelise Wilson: Right. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: I was monitoring babies movements. was drinking a lot of water, making sure to stay hydrated. And I think that was it. Yeah. So I was doing all those things just to make sure I was good, monitoring the color of the water. was clear. So there was no, it wasn't brown, it wasn't green. Exactly. was aware that if that were to be the case, we should pay closer attention. And so. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Right. No more Coney Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: Night two rolls around and in my mind I'm like, okay, like I know I'm on a time crunch like with this because like the longer you wait, you know, the more likely it is that you could ⁓ contract an infection. And so obviously like I wanted to be wise and I didn't want to be just frivolous and just let myself go on forever and ever and ever. I did want to avoid an induction though. I did want to avoid having to have Pitocin Merelise Wilson: Mm. Mm-hmm. right? Ann Morris: so I reached out to my chiropractor friend ⁓ next night, right? And I said, hey, look, I've tried a lot of things to go into active labor and ⁓ nothing has worked so far. ⁓ by tomorrow, maybe early afternoon, I'm not in full-blown labor, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: can you come adjust me please? Because I'd heard about and I'd reached out to, ⁓ I'd written in a few Facebook groups and I said, hey, like this is the situation, does anybody have any advice? And so I got like lists and lists and lists of advice. And the one thing that stuck out to me that like I hadn't really tried yet was getting an adjustment. And so I was also. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. It's been 24 hours at this point or 48 or 24. Ann Morris: It's been 24 hours. Yep, 24 hours. And so ⁓ the next morning is Sunday. I wake up, I'm still not in labor. Still crampy though. I'm crampy. I know my body's trying. Like it's, I'm making progress. I know I am, but I just, I'm still not like having consistent contractions. I was having some, but they were very inconsistent. Maybe like 10 minutes every 15 minutes type thing. So we go to church. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: On the way home from church, we stopped by CVS and I go in because I need like more pads because I'm leaking like crazy and Merelise Wilson: I'm so impressed you went and left the house with your water broken. In my experience, it is so messy. I'm very impressed. Ann Morris: yeah, I just like I said with my first, just I try to not like or with my second, I try to like not focus on it until I really need to focus on it. And so ⁓ we go to CVS because I need more pads. But I also am like, let me look and see if they have any castor oil, because I knew that was another option, too. And I was willing to like take a little smoothie concoction thing if that's kind of the last case resort. But I was willing to try it if I needed to. Well, they didn't have any. They were out and Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: To me that was like a sign that like, okay, like maybe I won't need it. And so I come home and ⁓ I had already reached out to the chiropractor and said, hey, please, can you come today? I'm not like, things aren't happening still. I think I need you. And so she was like, yes, I have a really busy day but I can come around like 6 p.m. And I was like, that's fine, that's great. So this is just like a small minor detail but like so wild. And I feel like I should share it because like God was just so like. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: kind and gracious to us. So my husband, one of his best friends had passed away like two weeks prior and he was set to be one of the pallbearers in like the funeral. And the funeral was that day, Sunday, for one of his best friends. And it was scheduled for two o'clock. we like, when my water broke on Friday night, we were like, how is this gonna be like possible? Like what is going on Lord? Like, you know, we're trying to like just wait this out and see how things progress. But we were like, we just don't know how this is all gonna work out. So we just surrendered it and just prayed about it. We're like, Lord, you've got this. So my mom's there with me and the kids, I'm good. I'm contracting, but super irregularly. So my husband goes and does this amazing thing to honor his best friend at two o'clock. The chiropractor, like I said, she had a really busy day. Things got pushed back ⁓ to six o'clock. She was supposed to come close to the time he was gonna be gone. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Mm. Ann Morris: But like just circumstantially, she came like the earliest she could come was like six. And so he's back by then. He comes home, he comes home right around that same time. Well, she gives me an adjustment. She's like, ⁓ yeah, your right hip is like all out of whack. Adjust me from like top to bottom, does like reflexology on my feet. Adjusts like my hips, my back, my spine, my neck. I'm like tingling all over from like what she does. My like the feet thing was so cool. I don't know if you've ever had that done before. Merelise Wilson: Cool. No. Ann Morris: But immediately, like I tell you immediately, I go into active labor. Like she leaves at 6.45, I'm like in my shower by like seven. Like I'm not even kidding, like trying to cope. And I just kept saying to myself, oh my gosh, she did it, she did it, she did it. Wild. And so I had a feeling too when things shifted, it was gonna be quick. And so I'm in the shower, my husband is like frantically like putting our stuff in the car. Merelise Wilson: That's wild. That's wild. Ann Morris: because I'm telling him like, we need to go like now. ⁓ And so he's putting our stuff in the car. My mom is helping put our kids to bed. And ⁓ I like so desperately like wanted to stay in that shower, but I like forced myself to put clothes on and like go because the water is my happy place in labor. And so ⁓ we get in the car and I turn to him and I say, there's no way I'm gonna make it to Roswell. Like there's no way. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Ann Morris: And he was like, are you sure? And I was like, yes. Like we need to pivot. We need to go to like the closest one. And so we pivot because my body is starting to bear down. Like I can't, I cannot help it. I cannot control it. Mind you, it's like 7.45. She left it like 6.45. Merelise Wilson: Wow. Wow. Yeah. That's wild. Ann Morris: It's so wild. And so this is like such a like ⁓ push for like you to have chiropractic care like in pregnancy and like before labor, even during labor. ⁓ And so we pivot, we head over to, ⁓ if you're local, we head over to North Side Gwinnett. It's 10 minutes from our house. And I remember I tell my husband specifically what to say. I tell him to tell them when he walks in, my wife isn't voluntarily pushing. Merelise Wilson: Yes. Ann Morris: And he goes in, he's like, my wife's in labor. And they're like, uh-huh, okay, cool. Oh, and she, and she's pushing, she's pushing. So of course they like send out the Calvary. I'm like wheeled in. Of course, like I worked there as a doula. So I like recognize some of the people. So it's like, it's cool. It's like, obviously not my plan A at all, but I'm like, I'm comfortable, I'm fine. They put me in a room. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. You're like, that's not what you're supposed to say, honey. Ha ha. Yeah. Yeah. Ann Morris: I ended up getting the hospitalist that's like on call because clearly like they were not expecting me. And if you're listening to this and you don't know, if you're in labor, you can literally show up to any labor and delivery. They have to take care of you. It's like the law. So I knew that this was fine. It's just obviously again, like wasn't my plan A. ⁓ And so we get in a room and ⁓ my husband like forgot the birth plan in the car. And so he like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Right. Ann Morris: runs back to get it, like sprinting. And as he's sprinting back down the hallway, he's sprinting with another person. And it just so happens to be the midwife that's on call, because he turns to her and he says, hey, where are you going? And she goes, I'm going to a birth. And he's like, ⁓ me too. Maybe we're going to the same one. And so they both like walking together. They told me that after the fact, after my baby was born. But it's just like a funny side note about the whole drama of it all. It was like something in a. Merelise Wilson: Yes. It feels very symbolic that he forgot the birth plane in the car too, because it's like the birth plane was out the window. ⁓ Ann Morris: ⁓ yeah, ⁓ yeah. But actually, I will tell you this. I'm grateful that I had it because they were of course asking me tons of questions as I'm like walking in in labor. And I'm like, I'm transitioning, pushing like all the things. Like I do not want to be listening and focusing on that. where is the birth plan? And he's, and that's when he realized, ⁓ my gosh, I forgot it. And so that's why he went and got it so that I could basically, I had a very detailed list of things written out that had all of my information on it to just Merelise Wilson: Right. Yeah. Ann Morris: give them, right? So I was so grateful I had made it, you know, and thought of that ahead of time. So I was there for 18 minutes before she was born. Yeah, so it's a good thing I did not go to Roswell because we would have had a car baby. That would have been a fun story too. But I mean, I wouldn't have ended up getting my water birth. There's no way there wouldn't have been any time. So yeah, she was born at 818. Chiropractor had left at 645. So was there was it was Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yes. Yes. Ann Morris: precipitous, it's considered like a precipitous birth. ⁓ But yeah, it was amazing. I mean, all things considering, it worked out incredible. The midwife that I had at Northside Gwinnett was amazing. She was so respectful. She was so encouraging. ⁓ They don't see births like that very often, where like a mom comes in and stands up and pushes her baby out while standing up. Like that's literally what happened. I was standing, not intentionally. That's just how it happened. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. You were standing? ⁓ wow. Yeah. Ann Morris: ⁓ And I remember I said, can somebody please catch my baby? And she had just put gloves on and literally caught her. And ⁓ she brought, we kind of scooted back and went back to the bed. And that's when we checked gender, because we didn't know what we were having. And my husband says, it's a boy. I look and I said, ⁓ my gosh. I said, can we double check? And the midwife lifts up her leg and is like, that doesn't look like a boy to me. And I was like, ⁓ my gosh. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: doesn't look like a boy to me either. And he had seen like the umbilical cord and like, guess like just in the the excitement of it all ⁓ said that and so we kind of like joke about it to this day. ⁓ But yes, we indeed had our girl and I of course like sobbed and it was just it was amazing. ⁓ Yeah, I laid back in bed had the birth of placenta ⁓ explicitly told them I did not want any pitocin I didn't want. Merelise Wilson: ⁓ ⁓ my god. That's wild. Ann Morris: the HEP lock, didn't want any of it. ⁓ And they were really cool about it. They, ⁓ you know, just, felt very heard by the team despite like everything that had happened. yeah, I was, I was very grateful for the care that I received. I really prayed for, you know, my birth team and that like, I would feel how I did. And so I was so grateful that, you know, God gave me who I needed in the moment. Merelise Wilson: Mm. Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing. ⁓ my gosh. That's so our mutual friend, Dr. Rachel has been on the podcast. She, when I was pregnant with my second and I was seeing her, I was overdue, which I tend to be. And I remember I went to go see her and I was so uncomfortable. And she jokingly was like, let me see if I can find the eject button. And you know, she was like kind of saying it like as a joke, but she was like, that sometimes can happen. And it sounds like that is what happened with you. Like that chiropractor. found that eject button and you're ready to go after that. Ann Morris: Yeah. Yeah, did it end up working for you? Merelise Wilson: ⁓ not like that instantaneously. I think I saw her on like a Monday and that I went into labor like two or three days later. So I'm sure it helped. I'm sure it helped. ⁓ definitely didn't hurt. So, ⁓ my gosh. The eject button. Yeah. ⁓ my gosh. Wow. Okay. Ann Morris: Okay, cool. For sure. Yeah, no for sure. That's awesome. I love that. I've never heard of that before. The ejection or eject button. That's funny. I like that. I'll use that. Merelise Wilson: So that's absolutely incredible. So then how long did you stay in the hospital ⁓ with your third? Just like a night and then? Ann Morris: Yeah, it was like 24 hours. Because we had our two younger kiddos to get back to. So that was the whole thing though, like with them like not having my records. So I had to like get my records transferred from like the other ⁓ provider and stuff like that. Because they were like, who are you? Like, have you had prenatal care? You know, like all those questions. So I had to get the records sent over. But yeah, they were really, ⁓ really cool about it. And, know, third time mom, I feel like they're a little more lenient when you've had children, you know, ⁓ if you say like, Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yes. Ann Morris: I wanna go home, as long as you and your baby are doing well, they're typically pretty ⁓ amicable about that. Merelise Wilson: Yeah, it's I, I've had someone else in the podcast who accidentally had a baby at home and then they took an ambulance to the hospital. And she said that she felt like they were like treating her and her baby, like they were aliens from Mars because they hadn't, you know, expected them and they didn't know their history or anything. And it sounds like that was not as much your experience, even though you were an unexpected patient. sounds like it was a lot more hospitable. Ann Morris: Mmm. Yeah. Yeah, I'm so grateful it worked out how it did. Merelise Wilson: ⁓ Going back a little bit, you said, I think it was maybe with your second and then also with your third, that you explicitly told them you didn't want pitocin. Can you just kind of like tell the audience a little bit about why, what your thoughts were behind not wanting pitocin involved in your births either during labor to induce and then also post? Ann Morris: Yeah, sure. So I unknowingly, sorry, received Pitocin with my first. So in hospitals across the US, Pitocin is given as expectant management, that's what they call it, after your baby is born. And so basically they're expecting you to bleed more than you should. And so they also give it to help the placenta detach from the uterus. And so, ⁓ you know, they gave it to me. with my first, but I never consented to it. I didn't even know I was given it until a couple months later. And I had a really bad postpartum anxiety with my first. ⁓ And so in the process of becoming a doula, going to births things like that, ⁓ I did more research on Pitocin and there actually are studies that have been done that have linked Pitocin to postpartum anxiety and ⁓ other like mood disorders. so ⁓ I am just, again, kind of going back to like Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Mm. Mm. Yeah. Ann Morris: how I live my life, like I'm the type of person that like, if I don't really need something, I don't want it. And so I'm not against like medicine, like of course, if I have a really bad headache, like, and I've tried other things, I'm gonna take medicine, right? But like, if I don't feel like I really need it, I don't want it. Because I know that those things have, you know, consequences and side effects and things like that. And so ⁓ that was the thought process behind not wanting it if I didn't really, really need it. Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Sure. Right. Ann Morris: ⁓ And so yeah, with my second, ⁓ immediately after my son was born at home, they gave me a mixture of herbs and I took it by mouth. It was like liquid ⁓ and it was a mix of placenta ease is what it's called and hem halt and I believe shepherd's purse. And so they give those to you right away after the baby comes out before the placenta is born. And they do that to prevent unnecessary bleeding and also to help. Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Mm. Ann Morris: the placenta detach. And so I loved that because it was like, you know, herbs and, ⁓ you know, no negative side effects or anything like that. Yeah, but they did have those things on hand if I needed them. Like they have Pitocin available ⁓ if you really need it. And so again, same situation with my third, like I told them, look, like monitor my bleeding. If my bleeding is bad and like, you feel like I could use something, like I'm open to having a conversation, but like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. more natural. Yeah. Right. Right. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: do not give it to me unless if like we have that conversation and I feel comfortable with it. Merelise Wilson: Yeah, I love that. That makes perfect sense. And then I know because we were talking about this before we got on the phone too, ⁓ you had your home birth was in Florida. And so the only other people I've spoken to that have had home births have been Georgia residents. And one other thing I wanted to ask you about too is, were there any kind of issues with finding a pediatrician to take your son because he was delivered at home? Ann Morris: Mmm. Good question. ⁓ No, I didn't have a problem because I was a part of a pretty close-knit community where home birth mamas were not the norm per se, but I was in groups where there were a lot of like-minded other moms. And so I had reached out to ⁓ those kinds of groups while I was pregnant and asked questions like that and got recommendations on providers that would take my child once he or she was born. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Got it. Okay. Ann Morris: Yeah, no, it wasn't very hard. had to make a few phone calls and tell them my plan. And ⁓ yeah, I just brought him in to the one that I found. It was in Lakewood Ranch. Off the top of my head, I can't remember the name of it right now. yeah, if anybody wants to reach out to me, I'm happy to look into that more. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. And then shifting gears a little bit into your work as a doula. So you support women in birth and in postpartum currently. Amazing. That's awesome. And then just out of curiosity, how many patients or do you call them patients or do you call them moms? How many do you take a month? Clients? Yeah. Ann Morris: Yes, yep, sure do. I love it. Clients. Yeah. I try to aim for like no more than two right now because you know, I have three kids and I don't work with like a collaborative or a partner or anything like that. It's just me. And so I feel like my capacity is like two right now, just in the season that I'm in. When I worked with a partner down in Florida, we were taking between five and seven clients a month. So it was a very fun and full season, but we just, had each other to like be our Merelise Wilson: Okay. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Ann Morris: know, backup. So, yeah, I was able to take on way more than. Merelise Wilson: That makes a lot of sense. And then as a doula, what are some of the things that you recommend to your moms or your clients that they do during pregnancy to kind of optimize their birth experience? Ann Morris: Yeah, I love that question. So I feel like a lot of the prep work should really be like mental and emotional. ⁓ And so I feel like you should really spend time like working through any fears that you might have about birth. I really feel like you should, you know, take time to like journal or, you know, pray, ⁓ talk through things like with your husband, with your doula, with your care provider, listening to like Merelise Wilson: Mmm. Ann Morris: things like positive birth stories, like your podcast. I really feel like your mindset matters a lot more than like most people realize. ⁓ I also think that like education is really important. So educate yourself on the birth process and like all of your options that you have, you know. ⁓ I want you to understand like how labor works, ⁓ you know, what your choices are, what are the types of interventions that might be offered to you and what are the benefits and risks of those interventions, right? Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: ⁓ And also learning about too, like how to advocate for yourself. That'll help you really feel more confident when you are in labor instead of feeling overwhelmed by everything happening around you. ⁓ And then I really truly think your team matters a heck of a lot. And so that includes first and foremost above anything else is your care provider. like, you know. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: don't be like me the first time around and choose your care provider just based on like convenience or ⁓ who accepts your insurance like truly like I would really encourage you like if you're listening to this and you're planning to be pregnant in their future or if you're currently pregnant now like if you don't feel like a hundred percent of like a heck yes like with your care provider like and you feel like nervous to go to appointments or if their presence makes you feel any sort of like way that's like not like warm and fuzzy like Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Ann Morris: I would consider thinking about that more and it's never too late to change care providers. I want you to know that ⁓ because your care provider plays, if not the biggest, a huge role in how your birth can unfold. ⁓ so also keeping in mind to your partner or your doula or your friend or whoever else you're going to be having in the room with you, just make sure that everyone is aligned with your values and understands what your preferences are so that Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: you can really feel supported, you know, like no matter how your birth ends up unfolding. yeah, those would be like a few things I'd recommend that people do. Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Those are fantastic recommendations. Yes, all of that. I was talking about this with someone recently, but birth is so much more mental than I think a lot of people think, especially if you haven't been there as a first time mom. But I would say it's almost more mental than it is physical in some ways. ⁓ It's such a journey, and I love what you said about if you have any fears around birth, exploring that ⁓ and digging into it because... Ann Morris: Yeah. Merelise Wilson: If there's a disconnect, like, and I'm sure you've read stories about this too, but you know, there can be situations where women are holding back pushing or the body isn't progressing because they have this kind of like deep seated fear that they haven't addressed. And so, yeah, I think that's, such an important part of your pre birth process and your pregnancy is like understanding all that, understanding like what your perception of birth is positive, negative, or otherwise. and, and yeah, really spending some time sitting in that. This is kind of 101, for my... audience who doesn't know, how would you describe what a doula does and what your role is in pregnancy and birth supporting women? Ann Morris: Yeah, it's a great question. I like to say that like a doula is like your pregnancy roadmap ⁓ through like pregnancy and then birth and then postpartum, right? Because when you become pregnant, what do you do? You go to Google, you go to social media, you Google all the things, you listen to all the influencers and what they say about stuff, but you can kind of just like simplify all of that if you have a doula because a doula is Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. Ann Morris: a trained professional who works with families during the pregnancy, ⁓ birth and postpartum period, right? And so we are there to essentially educate you and your partner on the process of birth ⁓ about different comfort measures to make birth more comfortable about, you know, the different interventions that might be offered to you and, you know, why in certain scenarios you would want those interventions, but then also like maybe what the risks are of those interventions as well. And so really we're there to help make your birth experience just like a positive overall experience. ⁓ We're also there to help advocate for you if you're feeling like maybe you're not being heard by your care provider. Maybe they're wanting to do things that you're not wanting to do. ⁓ And so we're there to help create space for you to feel heard and to feel seen during that process. ⁓ We're also there to help you postpartum as well. And so ⁓ I can come to the home and be there for you to help process your birth experience, to help with breastfeeding struggles, to help with newborn questions. A lot of times, if it's a first time mom, she's never been through any of these things before. Maybe she has a family member, like a nephew or niece that maybe she's been around a lot, but it's your own, it's different. And so... Merelise Wilson: Mm-hmm. for her. Ann Morris: I'm there to just help answer any of the questions that might come up during that time. ⁓ I'm also there to help her with bonding and healing and ⁓ just provide education just at every turn and twist of the whole journey. yeah, that's why having a doula can be so helpful just because you have somebody in your pocket, literally. can text me, call me anytime if things come up and... Merelise Wilson: Yeah. Yes. Ann Morris: I'm just there to help make that journey as smooth as possible. yeah, and people are welcome to like reach out to me if they have more questions about like what a doula does, but that's kind of like a good like general overview of like my role. Merelise Wilson: That's such a perfect summary. That is exactly what my doula did for me. I didn't have them with my first, but I did with my second. That's exactly what she did for me. And I think that there is a perception that doulas are just for birth, like just in those hours that you're in labor. And I really want to emphasize everything you just said. Like very, very little of what you talked about was even like during birth. And ⁓ I think that truly like there's so much value. during the pregnancy process, like I think a lot of us, a lot of women have anxiety about what's happening to their body, what's happening to their baby. And like if you're at a traditional medical practice, sometimes they don't always a lot, a lot of time, a lot, a lot of time at appointments to talk about it, or you might be nervous to ask someone, you might be seeing a different provider each time you're there and your doula can kind of be that consistent sounding board that isn't Dr. Google, that isn't going to, you know, create unnecessary fear. that isn't your mom saying, well, I did it this way. This is what happened to me, however many years ago, or friends or whatever, or social media. And that's something that I found so valuable with my doula, was just being able to be like, hey, this is what I heard at my OB. Am I translating this right? Did I understand that correctly? Or this weird thing happened in my body today. And is that normal? All of it. was just so amazing to have that resource, that consistency, that like safe space to just to have it there for me. In pregnancy, of course in birth, the abdullas are so amazing and shine in birth, of course. ⁓ As advocates and someone who has a lot more experience, obviously someone who's there solely for you, right? Like they don't have any other births they're attending that day, hopefully. They're really there just for you. And then yes, in postpartum as well, same thing as in pregnancy. Like you want to avoid, think Dr. Google at all costs, because you just end up being scared if you start Googling whatever's happening to your body or baby postpartum. And I would text my postpartum doula all the time, so many questions. And it just alleviated so much anxiety and fear for me to have that like resource and that wonderful safe space and that person that ⁓ I knew I could count on ⁓ and trusted. So. Yes. Yeah. ⁓ Ann Morris: Yeah, I love that. I love that you had such a great experience with your doula as well. It's so great. Merelise Wilson: I did. It's interesting to you. haven't, I haven't spoken about this yet, but I actually switched doulas. I had, I was planning to work with one doula in my second pregnancy and went to meet her in person and kind of do a training. And then I just didn't feel good about it afterwards. And I actually switched. ⁓ You talked about switching providers, count doulas and that too. I, Ann Morris: Mm-hmm. Merelise Wilson: towards the of my pregnancy, I was nervous I wasn't gonna be able to find someone, but I found a different doula and she was, I guess it wasn't the end of my pregnancy, it was probably halfway through. And she was wonderful, she was incredible. So yeah, so yes, you gotta trust your gut, because those are your people. Ann Morris: Yeah, for sure. You have to be able to really feel 100 % comfortable with that person because they're going to be with you in the most transformative, raw situation ever. And so, yeah, you definitely have to feel 100 % about that person for sure. Merelise Wilson: Yes. Yeah, absolutely. ⁓ I always like to close out my episodes by asking my guests to describe birth in three words, just whatever comes to mind, like top of mind for you. Ann Morris: Holy, intense, and transformative. Merelise Wilson: those are beautiful. Yes, absolutely. ⁓ Ann thank you so, much for being here today. I really appreciate you spending time with me. Ann Morris: It was so fun. Thank you again, Merelise I really enjoyed connecting with you today. Merelise Wilson: Of course. All right, well, you've been listening to the Arrivals podcast until next time.