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Transcript

My Body Is My Buddy: Musical Healing with Tessa Violet · In Moderation

• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Liam, Liam, Liam.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: Hey, rob, rob, rob, Rob, rob Rob.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: You're like Beetlejuice If I say your name three times, you appear.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: You just said it like six times.
• 0:26
  Speaker 2: Does that mean I go back?
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: That's a good question.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: So, liam, yes, pretend you didn't know me.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Pretend you didn't know me.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: I know you want to like, I mean.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: I don't have to.
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: Okay, you see me in the gym, I'm benching 300.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: I've got my headphones on.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: Wait hold on Kilograms or pounds.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: Oh, definitely kilograms.
• 0:46
  Speaker 2: Okay, Gosh just make sure?
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you had to make sure that's fair.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: Don't use no freedom units up here.
• 0:54
  Speaker 2: Listen, I had told people to guess my height in a video and they're like 190 centimeters.
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: I'm like I don't know what the fuck that is.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: Are you saying I'm tall or short?
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: We only use that's actually pretty darn close to your height.
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I saw a bunch of 190.
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: I was like that sounds like it could be tall.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: I don't fucking know.
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: So you see me in the gym.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: What music do you think I'm listening to?
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Abba, I mean, yes, but ABBA it's a tie between Abba or Disney songs.
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: Like you know, You're Welcome from Moana, or something like that.
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: That's impressively close, much closer than most other people would guess.
• 1:34
  Speaker 3: Okay, if I had to guess, I would definitely guess metal.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've definitely had people that have been scared to approach me Like oh, that guy's hardcore.
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: Every metalhead I know, though, is so nice.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, but yeah, if you look at a lot of my playlists, in the first five songs you will probably find our guest today, Tessa Violet.
• 2:00
  Speaker 2: Wait, that was her intro this whole time.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: That's what that was.
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: What a hoodwink.
• 2:06
  Speaker 3: Stop.
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: Oh my God, I'm honored.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: So why don't you introduce yourself?
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: Because we suck at introducing people.
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: Great, I love introducing myself, thank you, hi everybody.
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: My name is Tessa Violet.
• 2:16
  Speaker 3: I am a singer-songwriter.
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: You might know me from my most popular song, which is crush and it goes.
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: I can't focus on when he said get done and um.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: My newest song, which I think is the reason I'm here, is called my body's my buddy.
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: Um, but maybe it's not, I don't know anything.
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: Well, I hope it's the reason you're here, cause I've got it queued up in the back.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: Okay, great, great.
• 2:37
  Speaker 3: Um, yeah, and right now.
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: Sorry, let me turn my mic down.
• 2:40
  Speaker 3: Right now I am working on a record of like acoustic songs of Healing Mantras and my Body's.
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: My Buddy is the first song from that record.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: But what healing?
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Okay, so Healing Mantras.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: Healing Mantra for me is cartoon themes from the 90s.
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: Which cartoon theme from the 90s are you putting on the album?
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: Sailor Moon oh shit, fuck.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: Oh, sailor Moon's a good choice, though sailor moon's great.
• 3:05
  Speaker 3: Here's actually, this is the thing you need to know about me.
• 3:07
  Speaker 3: I literally love digimon so much and if people ever people like to compare digimon and pokemon, I understand why and I'm always like there is no comparison.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: Pokemon is the superior show, superior narrative, for a thousand reasons.
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: However, one thing I will concede is that, literally, the Pokemon theme song is the best theme song of all time.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: It can go with anything.
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember being eight years old and my friends and I would be like yelling it from our living room as we listened.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: I want to be the very best.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to sing all day.
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: But man, it's just, whatever it was, it hit hard so good.
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: Okay, it hit hard so good.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: Okay, so, speaking of healing, and my Body is my Buddy, that is the reason we brought you on is because you put out a song that is body positivity and forgiving and loving yourself.
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: And I guess, since I mentioned, I have the clip, maybe I'll start with that, do it?
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: From my birth to my grave, every step I've taken clip.
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: Maybe I'll start with that.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Do it my body, oh, so I just have to say I have my volume turned up, because Liam's usually really quiet in these recordings, and so I'm now deaf.
• 4:36
  Speaker 2: I know that happened to me real quick.
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh, let me turn that down just as fast as I possibly can.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: All right.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: So now that we can't hear anything, let's continue the interview.
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so like music, okay, so I think we should start there.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: So that's something.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: I've heard of this before.
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: So people generally take like wood or whatever, they turn it into boxes and then that creates like sound and they pair that with like, like the larynx that also creates sound, and then that like harmonizes together in a certain way.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: Correct me if I'm wrong.
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: I feel like I'm on the right track.
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, that sounds right to me.
• 5:09
  Speaker 3: I'd agree with that.
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: So where did the inspiration from this come?
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: from All right.
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: So what you must know about me is that I am sober from alcohol for seven years now.
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: I got married two years ago and I was thinking what do I want to do for my bachelorette party?
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: Because, like the idea of doing the traditional out on the town as a sober person, it's not like, oh, I can't be around alcohol.
• 5:35
  Speaker 3: It's just that it doesn't sound very interesting.
• 5:38
  Speaker 3: I'm like it just doesn't sound like a celebration of me and what I'm interested in.
• 5:44
  Speaker 3: I have this friend, julia Nunes, who runs these coaching retreats that are all about the power of your yes and no and connecting more deeply to desire, and I reached out to Julia and I was like, julia, do you think you would run a retreat for my bachelorette party?
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: And she's like, yeah, if you can convince everyone to do it.
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: Literally, I got 12 of my friends to do it.
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: It was so awesome.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: And one of the exercises in this retreat was an exercise where you write a letter from the perspective of your body.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: Like you give your body a voice and you write a letter from the perspective of your body to you.
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: You take a little break, then you read the letter and you write back from you to your body and then you repeat that whole exercise one more time.
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: So it's two letters each back and forth for total, and the thing that came up for me in my letter was this idea that I'm like oh wow, like you know, people will like come and go through your life.
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: You know your parents will die, new people will come in, but from the moment I'm born until I die, I will have this lifelong companion of my body and my belief is that my body loves me and my body is quite playful and funny and spirited and maybe I could take certainly I could take better care of my body.
• 7:10
  Speaker 3: But also I'm like I am very disconnected from my body.
• 7:14
  Speaker 3: So I wanted to write this song called my Body's my Buddy.
• 7:19
  Speaker 1: It's something we see a lot in the health industry that people will start their health journey in a place of hating themselves.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: They want to hate themselves into a better body.
• 7:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was going to say a lot of people probably what you just said.
• 7:34
  Speaker 2: You know my body loves me.
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: I would hazard a bet that many people would not feel that way, that they either hate their body or their body hates them, or they feel trapped in their body.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: That's something I've heard many times.
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, I think that's really common and I hesitate to tell someone that how they feel is wrong.
• 7:57
  Speaker 3: I'm like I don't know, maybe your body hates you, sure, like I don't know.
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: Like maybe your body hates you, sure, um, but when I look at the reactions to this song you know a lot of the like messages and comments I've gotten from people was just like I've literally never considered this idea that my body, that I am not my body, and that I am not like in a prison of my body, and like, especially especially this idea that, like you know, when your body has pain, instead of feeling your body is inflicting pain upon you, your body is with you in this journey, also in pain.
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: Like you are together in this experience.
• 8:35
  Speaker 3: This is a belief structure that is beneficial to me as I walk through my life.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: I am not saying that it needs to be right for everyone, so if you hear this and you think, oh, that doesn't work for me, shrug it off.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: I like that.
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: That's an interesting thought that your body's, if you're experiencing pain, it's not trying to harm you, it's also in pain and doing it along with you.
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: Yes, and pain is telling us something.
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: I'm really out of my depth.
• 9:10
  Speaker 3: I'm not a scientist here, that's okay, we aren't either.
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: We can just talk like we're experts.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: It doesn't matter.
• 9:16
  Speaker 2: This is a podcast.
• 9:17
  Speaker 2: That's how social media works.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's how podcasts work.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: I am an expert now.
• 9:21
  Speaker 3: I have knee pain sometimes and I know for me, when I'm experiencing that knee pain in my body, my body's telling me that I'm not moving my knees enough.
• 9:30
  Speaker 3: So I don't know.
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: I've always found that like I'm in, because, okay, you know, I've always heard people say like oh, people in larger bodies or in smaller bodies, and like maybe it's just a semantic thing.
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: But I've always found that sort of interesting because I'm like to me, my body is me, am I?
• 9:46
  Speaker 3: in my body.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: And that's more of a philosophical debate I feel like Do you feel you are your body.
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: Tell me more about that.
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: I don't feel like I'm in my body.
• 9:54
  Speaker 2: I feel like I am my body and that's just.
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: I don't really have an explanation for that.
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: Besides, like, hey, everything my body touches, I feel that's me.
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: It's all connected, the brain and the body, and all of it comes together.
• 10:08
  Speaker 2: The knee bones connect to the something bone Head bone Knees connect to the head, as we all know.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: You're the expert here Exactly, this is a podcast and I am a straight white man, so I will assert myself as a expert in everything.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: That is what that is for.
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: But yeah, no, and it's not like I felt like people say like, oh, someone in a larger body or smaller body, that's wrong.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: So I've just never said it because it always just sounded a little just odd, just like odd to me.
• 10:40
  Speaker 3: I don't know, yeah, interesting.
• 10:42
  Speaker 3: I have a question for you.
• 10:43
  Speaker 3: When I think of myself, there are many parts to me.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: There is my body and there is also my mind which.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: I also do not feel that I am Like.
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: I don't think that that is me, the essence of Tessa, and I'm curious for you do you feel you are your mind?
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: Is your mind a part of your body?
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: Is your mind your brain?
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: What's your belief structure around this?
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: So the mind and the body, I would say, are connected, of course, and to me I am both of those things, okay.
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: So this is where you get into the philosophical debate.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: Let's say, a brain transfer was a possible and you had your brain transferred into another person, another body.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: Right, they remove their brain.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: Your brain goes in there, are you?
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: You're still you.
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I am still me because my mind is there, but I'm missing part of me because my body's not there anymore.
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: There, but I'm missing part of me because my body's not there anymore.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: So, like I am still me, but like if somebody, somebody's brain went into my body, right, then I kind of I also sort of don't feel like it's me anymore because my, my mind isn't there, right, it's just my body, you know.
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: So I guess I, I feel like I'm more prone towards saying like my mind is mostly me and it's connected to my body.
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: So therefore it is me, but mostly I am my mind.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, cool.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: We'll have to trigger a Freaky Friday situation in Texas.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: What's the other?
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: one, they pee into the fountain.
• 12:15
  Speaker 2: That one seems easier.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: I remember when you came up with that, yeah, we did like a little dumb collab.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: We're like, yeah, we peed into the same fountain switch bodies, and then, you know, do a little video.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: I don't remember that movie but like, yeah, so it's that's.
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: I feel like, yeah, just more of a philosophical thing, like you kind of debate, and then you have the soul.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: Is there a soul?
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: What is the soul?
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: Is that?
• 12:35
  Speaker 3: what do you think?
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: soul.
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: I I I don't really have strong feelings towards a soul.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: Does it exist Possibly?
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: The most important soul, in my opinion, is Soul Train, soul Train.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: I like New Soul the song.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: That's a good song.
• 12:50
  Speaker 2: I forget the artist, who that's by, but that's a really good song.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: Look that up.
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: But yeah, I don't have strong feelings for it.
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: Are there actually souls?
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: I can't even define what a soul is, so how am I going to say it exists when I don't even know exactly?
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: I'm definitely one of those people that's like if I can see it, if I can touch it, it's real.
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: If I can, if you can measure it over and over and you have the same result, then it's real.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: Outside of that.
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: It's all a little.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Could we possibly define the soul as the overlap of the experience between your mind, your body, the various parts of you interesting.
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: That is a broad definition, so that's just but I mean soul itself is kind of a broad, it is I guess it's.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: It narrows it down somewhat, because if you don't, if you don't do that, it's just everything about you, or it's not.
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: Like I don't do that, it's just everything about you or it's not.
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: I don't even know what you.
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: So, yeah, so the connection between your mind and your body and everything that you go through is your soul.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: Is that part of the soul?
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: Can I tell you what I think the soul is?
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, go, absolutely Okay.
• 13:57
  Speaker 3: I'm not saying I'm right and I'm not even saying I'm going to believe this.
• 14:01
  Speaker 3: When you listen to this podcast that comes out a week later I don't know You're catching me Monday, april 7th, at 9.30am.
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: To me, the soul is like life, energy.
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: What is that special?
• 14:14
  Speaker 3: 0.1%, whatever that?
• 14:17
  Speaker 3: Sorry, I just got a notification.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: Let me turn this off.
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: This will be too distracting.
• 14:26
  Speaker 3: Like what makes us alive and that is soul to me.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: I, you know I'm interested in this idea that, like energy, cannot be created or destroyed and I feel that that is sort of where soul exists.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: To me I think it's fun.
• 14:38
  Speaker 3: One of my let me just say one of my best friends from high school, like one of my closest friends does not believe in the soul at all, and we love each other so much.
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I'm like Rose stop saying I don't have a soul and she's like I don't think.
• 14:50
  Speaker 3: I have a soul either and I'm like, but it's fun to believe in the soul.
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: Oh, I, 100% agree.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: See, that's my problem.
• 14:56
  Speaker 3: I'm ginger, I don't have a soul, I and she's like well, do you choose what you believe, or you do just happen to believe it and I'm like, okay, that's a great question.
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: I'm like I will say about myself that when someone tells me something they believe, I love to try it on, to, like you know, experience it in my mind's eye and to be like, ooh, do I agree with this belief?
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: And sometimes I do, and sometimes I'm like, no, but cool, I love that we all believe different things.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: I love that you get your ideas challenged.
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: I think that's kind of, you know, important in some way, just to hear people who have different thoughts on things.
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: I took in at Ohio State.
• 15:38
  Speaker 2: There was a class called Death and the Meaning of Life, which was one of my favorite classes.
• 15:43
  Speaker 3: Liam, you cut out.
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: I'm missing, whatever you're saying At Ohio State I took a class Death and the Meaning of Life Wait we missed you.
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: You cut out.
• 15:51
  Speaker 3: Say it all again.
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: You took a class called Death and the Meaning of Life, death and the Meaning of Life.
• 15:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, at Ohio State it was probably one of my favorite classes I've taken and it basically just kind of goes through each of either the religions or famous philosophers and their ideas on like what, why, why are we here, what are the big questions, why do we exist, what?
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: Blah, blah, blah, blah.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: All these different things, and that was fascinating and all of them just have very different, you know, opinions on what life is, what we do, do we have a soul?
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: Do we not have a soul?
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: And that's just kind of one of those things and I'm like it's interesting, but also like I just kind of shrug and I go, I don't know, I don't know, but it's fun to hear other people's thoughts on it.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: You tried it on and it wasn't for you.
• 16:31
  Speaker 3: Yeah, what do you guys do?
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: Do you have a practice around connecting to your body, and what does that look like for you?
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: I don't have a practice around connecting to my body.
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: I have a practice around connecting to my mind.
• 16:47
  Speaker 3: Oh, interesting, tell me about that.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: And that's actually with music Particularly.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: If I'm like feeling anxious stuff like that, I will sit down with usually the guitar.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: I will sit down with usually the guitar, and I'm not somebody who's good at guitar in the classical sense.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know how to play songs, I don't know what a well, I know some of the chords, but, um, it's an exercise of just plucking a string, listening to the, and it's almost like a puzzle game for me Finding what string sounds good together.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: And it's just, it turns something on in my brain and it gives me a focus and it gives me the sound of, it gives me the soothingness and I start to be able to hear myself better.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: I don't think that, like I don't think there's anything else to that.
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: I know that I left a pause there like I was going to say something else.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: I was like yeah and and uh, I used to say it's someone who's like I kind of just see my, my body, my mind is me, my body is me, I for me, it's more about just self-care and just making sure I take time for myself as someone who has like a one-year-old and like I'm doing social media and my wife and I'm trying to like juggle all these different things and there's a lot of stuff popping up and I'm like I need to just take time.
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: I've done that in the past where I haven't, and then it just kind of boils up and I just like lash out and I just get very angry at the littlest I can't find now stupid cutting out internet.
• 18:26
  Speaker 3: We missed you at the end.
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, I saw it pop up.
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: That's stupid.
• 18:30
  Speaker 2: I take time for myself because I can, otherwise that I can get mad at the littlest thing.
• 18:34
  Speaker 2: I can't find the remote and then I flip the hell out, right.
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: I think a lot of people have felt that way.
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: So, in order to just take time for myself, to just do something I enjoy, to just relax and I don't know watch jackass or whatever dumb thing that I like, and just take that moment to just, you know, like okay, I, this is just for me, I'm not worried about anything else.
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: I think that's really important.
• 18:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's awesome.
• 18:58
  Speaker 2: So what about yourself?
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: What do?
• 19:02
  Speaker 3: you do Tessa, all right, I'm in a practice right now, a one-month container, where I am waking up every morning and I'm starting my day with 15 minutes of meditation, which is the.
• 19:17
  Speaker 3: If you saw it, I made a little vomit face, I was like yeah, because I feel, rob, I feel way too connected to my mind, I feel um and quite disconnected from my body.
• 19:31
  Speaker 3: So and and also to me yeah and um, you know, within and and I want to say on this podcast, literally, I started this morning, so I am the beginner of beginners, I don't know anything, but here's what came to me in my first practice of it.
• 19:46
  Speaker 3: Um, you know, I am sitting there, I am aware that I am a beginner, that I'm not doing it perfectly.
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: I get like fidgety, and I noticed myself getting fidgety and then I try and center again and what I'm doing for 15 minutes is I'm trying to, as I breathe out, focus on my breath out, focus on the little pause and then focus on my breath in and focus on the sensation of my breath, like moving in and out of my lungs, moving in and out of my nose, and like that is where I am bringing the focus of my attention, to this feeling of breath, instead of the constant like internal monologue that I have going chattering on something.
• 20:23
  Speaker 3: Do you guys have an internal monologue?
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: oh yeah, all the time people's.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: I don't have my, so have you ever seen those uh toy monkeys that have the symbol that like clang together?
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 20:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a monkey clanging no.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: I don't really like.
• 20:43
  Speaker 2: A lot of times I just zone out and I'm just like thinking about nothing or it's just like you know I'm planning Cause I have, you know, that social media like a plan in the next video.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: Often I will just kind of mouth a lot of the lines I have planned for a video and my wife will be like, what are you planning on for this video?
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, and then I'll tell her because she knows when I like mouth words and stuff like that, and I'll have like gestures in my face because I'm like practicing what I'm going to do.
• 21:04
  Speaker 3: I'm the same way.
• 21:05
  Speaker 3: My husband will be like what are you thinking about now?
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly Right.
• 21:08
  Speaker 3: You're like, oh, let, what kind of suspicion are you having?
• 21:11
  Speaker 2: So this is my next dick joke I'm going to make in my upcoming video or something stupid like that Swear and then so like yeah, it's either just like really just nothing going on, or like you know, something like that, and I'm actually like acting it out, I don't yeah.
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: On the mention of morning meditation, I will say, now that it's warming up and there's not quite as much snow on the ground here, I have been wanting to get up and just go outside, get some sun, take Pippin for a walk and just have a nice quiet 15 minutes.
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: That's the way to start the morning.
• 21:48
  Speaker 2: That's the best way to start the morning.
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: You can have it, Rob.
• 21:50
  Speaker 3: I'm telling you, it's a little relaxing.
• 21:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah, that's it.
• 21:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yes, so I have a mentor in this and my mentor's like how do you want to do it?
• 22:00
  Speaker 3: I'm like I want to do 15 minutes every morning and he's like, okay, can I be honest with you?
• 22:03
  Speaker 3: I'm like, yes, and he's like most people fail at that goal I like that it's like I really recommend something easier to start and I'm like what's easier than 15 minutes?
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: that's where we start with diet, though people are like and like exercise.
• 22:16
  Speaker 2: I'm going to work out three days a week and then we're like hey, how about one day?
• 22:20
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and he's like what?
• 22:22
  Speaker 3: What I recommend is you should do three minutes of meditation five times a day.
• 22:26
  Speaker 3: So just um, you're going to set you know a thing in your calendar.
• 22:30
  Speaker 3: However, you want to do it and you're gonna be like, oh, it's meditation time, and then you're just going to take three minutes.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Was that your notification?
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: You got like 30 minutes ago, meditation time yeah.
• 22:39
  Speaker 3: So you know, but I sat with that.
• 22:41
  Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, I will do that as well, but there's something about the dedication of getting up for the morning.
• 22:47
  Speaker 3: I'm like, I think I for me, for my personality type, I, I at least want to try and I'm willing to fail if I can't stick with it, but anyway, so I'm meditating, you guys, I'm up at 6 am, I'm meditating and I hear my thoughts saying, you know, something like I'm bored, I'm uncomfortable, I can't wait until this is over, or, honestly, not even about meditation, about something totally unrelated.
• 23:11
  Speaker 3: And then I notice myself thinking and I say with my internal monologue I see you and I feel I have this moment where I can see my mind as something that is outside of myself.
• 23:24
  Speaker 3: My belief around my mind is that my mind is a tool and a buddy, but more mischievous than my body.
• 23:31
  Speaker 3: My body's like really kind of light and love.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: My mind is a little bit of a trickster and I'm like, oh my God, I keep thinking that I am you, but like hello, like you are a tool that I can either um use to create beautiful things, um, or I can let totally run me, like my mind is always running If I'm not um dedicated to the practice of being aware of this running.
• 23:59
  Speaker 3: And that was a cool moment to be like I see you.
• 24:01
  Speaker 3: And then you know that fades and then it comes up again.
• 24:04
  Speaker 3: I notice it again and I say I see you, but it's like, as I'm getting to the you in my internal monologue, it's like just fading to nothing, because even saying I see you is using my mind speaking of using your mind as a form of expression, obviously, um, well, I should say it seems like you do a fair amount of expression through your song.
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: Yes, I mean, you've got uh what no?
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: No song, my god was sort of like a sexual awakening.
• 24:34
  Speaker 3: Yes, we're waking up, we're being sexy, we're being a bad bitch.
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: You got.
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: You Are Not my Friend.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: I guess we could just say that's about a bad relationship, yes, and not about teen pregnancy.
• 24:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and not about hating teen moms.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so how much of your music is just you expressing yourself?
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: All of it, 100%.
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: All of it, a hundred percent.
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: All of it my belief.
• 24:57
  Speaker 3: Have you ever read A Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert?
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: Nope.
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: Ooh, you guys are my creative people.
• 25:03
  Speaker 3: I think you'd like this book.
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: Or maybe not, I don't know.
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: Anyway, elizabeth Gilbert is the author that did Eat, pray, love, and this was one of their follow-up books.
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: It's a guide.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: It's a guide, it's a scaffolding for belief around creativity.
• 25:18
  Speaker 3: If you don't feel like reading an entire book, she also did a TED Talk on it like 12 years ago, and, to be honest, the TED Talk covers all the content in like 20 minutes.
• 25:27
  Speaker 3: But it's about this belief that ideas for creative ventures exist outside of you.
• 25:35
  Speaker 3: You don't invent them.
• 25:37
  Speaker 3: You are open enough to listen to them and your job as an artist is to channel that idea from this ethereal realm into Sorry, we're going to be really esoteric today, I hope that's okay Channel it into this dimension, as it were, and you have lots of tools to do that.
• 25:56
  Speaker 3: One of the tools is the mind Like for me, when I write a song, I begin by just trying to move my fear out of the way, because if I'm at the beginning of a session, often I will feel what if nothing good comes?
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: What if I don't write anything?
• 26:13
  Speaker 3: What if I feel bored?
• 26:14
  Speaker 3: And I become aware of those fears and I just try and really move them out of the way.
• 26:18
  Speaker 3: And I say this is just my practice today.
• 26:20
  Speaker 3: I'm practicing being open enough to bring something through.
• 26:24
  Speaker 3: And in the beginning I do feel when I write a song I'm pulling on my lived history, but there is also a sense of pulling something from the air.
• 26:38
  Speaker 3: And then, once you have like some ideas down, you can start to use the tool of your mind to refine, to make it all make sense, to ask yourself, like do I like this?
• 26:49
  Speaker 3: Like okay, I'm going to judge it now.
• 26:50
  Speaker 3: We don't judge when it's coming through.
• 26:52
  Speaker 3: When it's coming through, we're just opening it up to let something in.
• 26:56
  Speaker 3: But once we're editing, we're putting on our judgment cap.
• 26:59
  Speaker 3: We're being like what about this works?
• 27:00
  Speaker 3: What about this is not working?
• 27:02
  Speaker 3: Yet I totally lost my train of thought here.
• 27:04
  Speaker 3: Guys, I'm so sorry.
• 27:05
  Speaker 3: I'm like what?
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: was the question, but I'm a huge fan especially as somebody with chronic depression anxiety, all that fun stuff of finding a way to express yourself through creativity.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: Yes, and do you have any tips for people that might want to start expressing themselves musically?
• 27:28
  Speaker 3: Musically.
• 27:29
  Speaker 3: That's a great question, rob.
• 27:31
  Speaker 3: Thank you for asking me.
• 27:32
  Speaker 3: Is this for someone who's never played before, or maybe someone who has like a little bit of practice?
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Let's start with somebody who's never played before.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: Maybe somebody wants to pick up an instrument and they're like okay, I really feel like I could express myself through this thing.
• 27:47
  Speaker 3: Yes, great Love this, yeah, they got a didgeridoo.
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: And now they're like what do I do?
• 27:50
  Speaker 3: I've got a didgeridoo hell yeah, I have literally so many like sound bath type instruments in my apartment and the didgeridoo is one that I don't have anyone who's listening to this podcast.
• 28:01
  Speaker 3: When me and Rob popped on both, does the video go out somewhere?
• 28:04
  Speaker 3: I don't even know that we both have these frame drums in the background of our, I'm like, oh my gosh, we're connected, okay.
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: So, just like everything I've spoken of today, the ability to practice creative music is also a practice.
• 28:27
  Speaker 3: So the first day you do it, you have to go into it with the attitude of I am a beginner, I'm just learning For me, attitude of I am a beginner, I'm just learning For me.
• 28:38
  Speaker 3: When I decided I was going to start learning guitar, I had a vision of myself six months from now, and by vision, you guys, I don't mean anything esoteric, I just mean I imagined within my mind's eye it's not that deep that I was going to learn to play some songs and people were going to be impressed by me.
• 28:52
  Speaker 3: And I was very motivated by that concept and I thought, even if no one believes in me now and my ability to do this, I believe in myself and I will learn a little bit at a time, and every minute I spend practicing is one more minute toward this goal.
• 29:11
  Speaker 3: I love guitar, I recommend guitar, but I think guitar is sometimes too hard for people who are new, new, new, because there's a bit of a hurdle that you have to be willing to build up the calluses on your fingers, which is painful.
• 29:23
  Speaker 3: You go through a blister phase.
• 29:25
  Speaker 3: So ukulele is a great stringed instrument that can get you going.
• 29:29
  Speaker 3: People like to make fun of ukulele.
• 29:30
  Speaker 3: People think it's a beginner's instrument, but that's because most people's experience with ukulele is only ever having heard.
• 29:37
  Speaker 3: I heard people will say I don't like ukulele, I'm like that's not true.
• 29:41
  Speaker 3: You just don't like listening to beginners play music which that makes sense.
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: I mean anybody that says they hate ukulele.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: I just say, go watch Izzy.
• 29:50
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, I'm like.
• 29:51
  Speaker 3: Ukulele is a beautiful instrument.
• 29:53
  Speaker 3: You just are only familiar with new people.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: I've always been curious.
• 29:56
  Speaker 2: Just because you're a musician, what's up with the banjo?
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: That always seemed fun.
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: That always seemed like a fun instrument to play.
• 30:01
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't play it, but maybe you do in the future.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: That always seemed fun.
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: If I was speaking between guitar and banjo, I'm going banjo.
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: That just it's fun.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: Banjo.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: That just.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: It's a.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: It's a fun.
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: Banjo is fun.
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: I had a banjo for a while.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: My ex had one.
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: She never really played it.
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: She left it around for me to play.
• 30:22
  Speaker 1: She finally took it back, so I don't have it anymore.
• 30:24
  Speaker 3: Yes, you can have it.
• 30:25
  Speaker 3: Okay, so sorry.
• 30:26
  Speaker 3: Back to this, this practice.
• 30:28
  Speaker 3: The best advice I was ever given about songwriting is that inspiration is for amateurs.
• 30:33
  Speaker 3: If you are going to wait, wait, wait until you feel inspired, you will find that you are not spending a lot of time practicing.
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: For me and my music practice, I block time out in my day.
• 30:43
  Speaker 3: It doesn't have to be every day, you know, like y'all saying, with working out, maybe you just start with once a week you know, like you said with your meditation yes, start small.
• 30:52
  Speaker 3: Start small, but you give yourself a framework of time where you say this is the time that I am practicing being creative and inspiration may always come later, but then when inspiration comes, you will have the practice that you need to pull that idea in better.
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: I like that.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: I like that.
• 31:12
  Speaker 3: Do you write songs, Rob?
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: I am at the point where I am starting to try Because, as you said, I did the practice first and now that it's starting to form in my head, I have some of the skills to actually start putting it together.
• 31:26
  Speaker 3: Yes, I love that.
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: I love that.
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: Can I tell you guys a desire I have?
• 31:31
  Speaker 1: Of course, oh, I'm sorry, no, sorry, okay, I do not consent.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: Of course, oh, I'm sorry, no, sorry, okay, well, I do not consent no, consent is not given.
• 31:37
  Speaker 3: I kind of want to do like a workshop with people.
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: That is around helping beginners start to write songs.
• 31:45
  Speaker 3: But I literally have no infrastructure on that, but it's like a someday dream but I'm like, yeah, I think I'd be good at that.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: I do believe anyone can write a song.
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: I'm not saying everyone can write a hit song, but but can we be honest, like a lot of times, the hit songs, are they the best songs?
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: Are they even good songs, like the hit songs?
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: Or do you just say Around the?
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: World 1,800 times and then it gets a gajillion views.
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: Not that I dislike that song, I'm not trying to hate on daft punk here, like.
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: But you know, like sometimes the pop songs that hit the the charts maybe aren't the the most well like written or thought out or you know that sort of thing they're usually following a formula.
• 32:27
  Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, well to to offer a contrary opinion.
• 32:33
  Speaker 3: Um, there are some hit songs that I personally think are stupid, if I'm being honest, however, if a hit song were actually easy to write, everyone would do it and let me tell you writing a hit song is incredibly hard, even if it is just saying around the world a million times, because there is something about that song that feels so fucking good you're just like ah right, millions of people wouldn't listen to it if it wasn't like quote, unquote.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Good, what is good?
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: Is it good if it gets a lot of views because you know listens, then yeah, it is a good song, yeah, or does it get a lot of listens because it makes people feel good?
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: There's a, there's a lot to this.
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: That's what you know, like I mean.
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: But like they're maybe not the most deep songs that make you really like right, exactly that make you, that are thought provoking Let me maybe put it that way.
• 33:27
  Speaker 3: Yes, for sure, for sure.
• 33:28
  Speaker 3: In general, like big, big songs tend to be songs that make people feel good and, in fact, simple.
• 33:37
  Speaker 3: That make people feel good and, in fact, simple things make people feel good and maybe there's something to that.
• 33:39
  Speaker 2: Everybody you say gangnam style, open whatever it's open, gangnam style, dance around and you get 18 kajillion views nobody even knows the lyrics I don't know the lyrics.
• 33:49
  Speaker 3: I still listen to it I've still never seen that music video oh, really wow.
• 33:54
  Speaker 2: I watched it just because I felt like I had to.
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: After a trillion views, I was like, all right, well, let me, you know, I gotta, I gotta check I have I'm pretty sure it got foisted on me my husband just walked in, hi scooty.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: I'm doing a podcast right now hi dante rob says hi, liam does not say hi I don't say hi, what I will will say can I tell you what I've gotten into, that I enjoy Fidget toys.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: I've really enjoyed that which ones?
• 34:19
  Speaker 3: And?
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: why?
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: Usually the little spinners.
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: I like anything that like the little fidget spinners.
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: I'm like 10 years late to the party on this, but like I don't know.
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: There's something I just enjoy where I kind of just zone out and there's just something like twirling around or spinning or going up and down or whatever it is and I'm like, yeah, this is kind of nice where I'm just like not really thinking about anything but there's just a little spinny doodad I enjoy.
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: I enjoy that.
• 34:43
  Speaker 3: I like it.
• 34:43
  Speaker 3: Yes, a little simple thing Makes us feel good.
• 34:46
  Speaker 3: It's the simple things in life, right?
• 34:48
  Speaker 3: Yes, I mean, I think so.
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: Smell the roses, spin the thing in your hand not okay.
• 34:53
  Speaker 3: Okay, this is a, since you're saying this, sorry total.
• 34:56
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 34:57
  Speaker 3: Well, I have two questions.
• 34:58
  Speaker 3: I want to check in on one.
• 34:59
  Speaker 3: I know we're at an hour.
• 35:00
  Speaker 3: How long are your podcasts normally is?
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: it okay if I keep talking shit, or until we're done, yeah is it okay to go a little bit longer?
• 35:07
  Speaker 3: oh yeah, or do you?
• 35:08
  Speaker 3: Do you have?
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: to go.
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: It's okay if you do an hour 40 minutes, I believe yeah okay, great.
• 35:14
  Speaker 3: Also part of me is I'm like maybe talk about the take out all that part where I said all that stuff aboutophobia.
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: I don't know if I just did a good job representing it.
• 35:20
  Speaker 3: I want to.
• 35:21
  Speaker 3: It's difficult to speak to it when it's like my lived experience is from the perspective of a thin, white former model body.
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: Anyway, this is what I was going to say, which is not related to that at all, I do you feel?
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: Yes, I feel.
• 35:42
  Speaker 2: No, I don't feel.
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: Oh shit, that's a problem.
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: I should get this checked out.
• 35:46
  Speaker 3: I'm so sorry.
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: This is a total like unrelated thing at all and I'm like how do I make this?
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: related to what I was just saying.
• 35:53
  Speaker 3: We go for it, that's what we do okay, great, um, I feel that, okay, if we're speaking outside of all the like political, societal, like infrastructure problems, we have in this country one problem, but besides all that, um, I really feel that we need more community, which I think everyone knows and is talking about.
• 36:17
  Speaker 3: But I am like what does that look like in a real way?
• 36:20
  Speaker 3: How can we foster actual community?
• 36:23
  Speaker 3: I'm interested in this idea of healing.
• 36:27
  Speaker 3: What does healing look like?
• 36:28
  Speaker 3: I think a lot of people it's a common belief, maybe, especially for men Are both of y'all men.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: Let me check.
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: Okay, great, so maybe you can speak to this.
• 36:38
  Speaker 3: But I believe that there is a belief for especially men that they feel that, okay, I will go out and make more friends, I'll make more community once I'm like right with myself, once I'm fixed, once I you know whatever.
• 36:52
  Speaker 3: And I am just curious if, in fact, there can be more healing, if you are willing to be vulnerable about who you are right now.
• 37:02
  Speaker 3: And does any of what I'm saying mean anything?
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: Can I rant about something I know?
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: usually it's Liam that rants but I absolutely have a rant about this about community, because one thing I tried to do when, particularly when starting up a discord, was I tried to reach out to other creators and be like, hey, let's merge into this one big community, bring everybody together, have a community.
• 37:33
  Speaker 1: And I absolutely hate that everybody always feels they need to have their own thing, because humans are finite resources.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: A single person is only going to be part of one or two communities.
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: I mean they might have again in the terms of Discord.
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: They'll have one or two main Discords that they've joined and then they might have a bunch of other ones, but if they're going to talk about how they feel or something, they're only going to do it in one or two of those.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: They're not going to go to every single one, and so I hate that everybody spreads them out.
• 38:16
  Speaker 1: Every time somebody makes a new discord, you are you.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: The only way for it to exist is to take from somebody else's discord, and so we actively are not building communities, we are actually spreading those communities out, and I hate it is something I have always, have always hated, because I'm absolutely completely for building bigger communities, building safe spaces for people to talk about what's going on, bringing people together to validate each other and in shared experiences, and particularly as a man speaking, we have that aspect of men aren't allowed to have feelings, men aren't allowed to ask for help and you get into a community where there's other men who are sharing their feelings, asking for help, you are more likely to do that.
• 39:11
  Speaker 3: Yes, yes, yes.
• 39:13
  Speaker 3: We look to each other and we see.
• 39:15
  Speaker 3: Okay, rob, can I tell you one of my beliefs?
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: Of course.
• 39:19
  Speaker 3: I believe this about all people, but especially the role of the artist.
• 39:22
  Speaker 3: It is your duty to let the person that you were as a seven-year-old, your light shine before the world made you feel embarrassed for being who you are.
• 39:31
  Speaker 3: It's your duty to let your light shine, because when you give yourself permission to be who you are, you give everyone else permission to be who they are too.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: I like that.
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: Sorry, I was also burping at the same time.
• 39:45
  Speaker 3: I'm glad there's permission to burp on this podcast.
• 39:48
  Speaker 3: Thank you.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: I'm glad there's permission.
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: It's funny you bring that up though just because I was just talking with my wife about this and we talk about it a decent amount because she has this feeling as well that we've lost a sense of community and that has been a disservice to the human psyche.
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: I guess, in a way and the way I look at it is from a perspective of both technology and as populations have increased those two things, I think, have driven us apart, which is kind of weird, because like, oh, more people should mean more community.
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: When in general, let's say, you go to like a rural area where there's only like 50 people, they probably all know each other, right, like they're probably there, they, you know, they know each other's name something, whereas if you go to an apartment complex with a thousand people, you maybe know one person, right, it's just kind of like as you get more people, you get pushed further away and I think it's just this loud noise, this din that's going on around you of so many different things to narrow down on one thing, whereas if you just have one neighbor in the middle of fucking nowhere, then you probably know that one person.
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: You put on top of that technology, which is great in so many ways and as has solved a lot of problems.
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: Of course, like with anything, it's going to create problems and I think, while we can use it in a in a way to kind of bring us together things like discord and whatnot, I think it just for the more so it pushes us apart and we all kind of live in our own little world with our social media.
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: And you just swipe and you and you and you look at what's just going on with just you and this phone and that's it.
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: I just say that is what I love about living rurally.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: I I hate every other aspect.
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: I hate the bad internet, I hate the one hour drive into the city to go shopping, but I love the community aspect and, like pippin's best friend is the dog across the alley, I can just go outside with pippin, bring him across the alley, let them play, talk with the neighbors, yeah, and it's great yeah I think, yeah, those two things, I, I, I, what uh I've talked about, like I named my whole like channel the plant slant after uh learning about the blue zones, and I talk a lot about their diet.
• 41:56
  Speaker 2: But their community is their places, where people live like into their 90s 100s.
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: Their community is very important to them and I think that's an important part of their health is they.
• 42:05
  Speaker 2: They, they absolutely interact with each other and they talk all the time.
• 42:09
  Speaker 2: They do all these things and I think that's kind of it kind of important.
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: So, you know, if you can find something that, whatever it is, whether whether it's a sport or a religion hey, it could be Scientology Well, maybe all right, let's maybe not go crazy but let's not go crazy, yeah let's not go too crazy here.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: I don't want to.
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: Well, let's me not.
• 42:25
  Speaker 2: Let me not turn off all the Scientologists that we're listening to.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: But you know whatever, you know community, that you know that whatever activity or whatever it is that that gives you a sense of community, I think could be very important to your health.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: Love it.
• 42:38
  Speaker 3: I have an exercise that I think it would be fun to do if y'all are open to it.
• 42:42
  Speaker 2: Is it first or is?
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: it.
• 42:43
  Speaker 1: No, you have to make us agree to it first, and then you, you suck the rest into something.
• 42:48
  Speaker 3: I'm going to explain it first and you can decide if you want to do it.
• 42:50
  Speaker 3: So this is a bring it all the way back to the end of the podcast.
• 42:54
  Speaker 3: This was one of the exercises I did at my um, uh, bachelorette party.
• 42:59
  Speaker 3: Um, and it's a desire exercise.
• 43:03
  Speaker 3: What it is is we will, I will set a timer for maybe three minutes, um, and I will ask one at a time.
• 43:12
  Speaker 3: So, rob, I'm going to ask you what do you?
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: want.
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: And then you're just going to say anything that you think that you want, and I'm going to say you can have it.
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: And then I'll say what else?
• 43:21
  Speaker 3: And then you'll say anything else that comes to mind, and there is no desire too big or too small, and we'll do that for about three minutes, four minutes, maybe three minutes, and then at the end I'll say wow, I love your desire, thank you for sharing, and you'll say thanks for listening.
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: Sure, I mean I'm in, okay, okay.
• 43:42
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 43:42
  Speaker 3: I don't feel like I felt an enthusiastic yes from Rob, and that is okay.
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: We don't have to do it.
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: Also, I could go first if you guys want to ask me sometimes it's easier to experience someone doing it.
• 43:56
  Speaker 3: I love to do this because, um, I don't always know what I want, and it is a helpful exercise to be like yeah, what do I want?
• 44:06
  Speaker 3: Also, it's a little bit vulnerable to on a podcast because I'm like what's going to come up?
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: I don't know oh, I mean, we've already embarrassed ourselves plenty of times great, that's fair.
• 44:16
  Speaker 3: Would you like me to go first, and do you guys actually want to do this?
• 44:20
  Speaker 2: Let's do it.
• 44:20
  Speaker 2: Let's do it Okay.
• 44:22
  Speaker 3: All right, Rob, you do it with me.
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: You're going to ask me what do you want?
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: And we're going to go through it.
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say what you want.
• 44:34
  Speaker 3: I want a fuller meal.
• 44:36
  Speaker 3: I'm hungry.
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 44:40
  Speaker 3: I want to wake up at seven tomorrow to meditate, not six.
• 44:44
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 44:52
  Speaker 3: Do I just keep going?
• 44:53
  Speaker 3: What else I want to do?
• 44:53
  Speaker 1: my three-minute meditation after this podcast and not forget, you can have it and we'll make sure that we remind you what else I think I want to own a home someday.
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: You can have it, thank you.
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: That was a hard one, but you can have it.
• 45:09
  Speaker 3: What else?
• 45:10
  Speaker 3: I want to live closer to friends.
• 45:12
  Speaker 3: I want to live within walking distance of my friends.
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: You can have that, what else?
• 45:17
  Speaker 3: I want to have enough money to have a reasonable retirement.
• 45:22
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 45:24
  Speaker 3: I want to be more connected to my body.
• 45:26
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: I want to move my knees after this podcast.
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: You can have that, what else?
• 45:38
  Speaker 3: I want to go on a fun date with my husband, Dante.
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: I will call him up and make sure it happens.
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 45:44
  Speaker 1: I want to save more money to spend less money.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: I want to spend less money.
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: I want to help people.
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: You can have that, what else?
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: I want to help people.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: You can have that, what else?
• 45:57
  Speaker 3: I want to put out a beautiful album that is meaningful to me and to others.
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, you're absolutely going to do that.
• 46:05
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 46:07
  Speaker 3: I want less mind chatter.
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:12
  Speaker 3: I want to move slower.
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 46:15
  Speaker 1: How long do I keep going?
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: I've got a timer.
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: We got 45 more seconds.
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: Okay, what else?
• 46:20
  Speaker 3: I want to be more gentle.
• 46:23
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:25
  Speaker 3: I want to continue to exercise more self-love.
• 46:28
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:30
  Speaker 3: I want more self-compassion.
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:35
  Speaker 3: I want to do a going away party before I move.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:41
  Speaker 3: I want to call my family more.
• 46:43
  Speaker 1: You can have it, what else?
• 46:45
  Speaker 3: I want to recognize beauty more when I see it.
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: You can have the timer up, but you can have that too.
• 46:51
  Speaker 3: Thank you, and then you say I love your desire.
• 46:54
  Speaker 1: I love your desire, thank you.
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: And then you say I love your desire, I love your desire, thank you for sharing.
• 46:56
  Speaker 3: Thanks for listening.
• 46:57
  Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, would one of you like to try it?
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Rob, you don't have to Rob.
• 47:02
  Speaker 2: You seem super enthusiastic about it.
• 47:04
  Speaker 3: Here's what I like about this exercise is that almost everything that we want.
• 47:10
  Speaker 3: When I hear you can have it, I realize, oh, I can have it.
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: It is literally just about setting my intentions, and the thing is that you can't have everything, but if you decide this is the thing I want, you can set forth, make that your intention and walk toward it, and I think that's powerful and I think it's helpful sometimes to say that you want something and maybe you thought you wanted it, but you hear yourself say it out loud and you think, yeah, actually maybe I don't want that.
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: There are stories we tell ourselves about what we think we should want, okay, okay, all right, let me get rid of the mind chatter here.
• 47:45
  Speaker 3: Yes, there's three minutes.
• 47:46
  Speaker 3: There is no wrong thing.
• 47:47
  Speaker 3: You can say this is not a test, silence is okay, it's okay to think about it and it's okay to say something stupid.
• 47:56
  Speaker 3: There's no judgment.
• 47:58
  Speaker 3: This is play Rob.
• 48:00
  Speaker 3: What do you want?
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: More friends.
• 48:03
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: Enough money to repair my truck.
• 48:07
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: Also enough money to support all the other people when they're streaming or when they need something or something else.
• 48:21
  Speaker 1: All that stuff, you can have it.
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: What else To build a nice backdrop for videos?
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: What else To go lay in the sun with Pippin?
• 48:30
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: A fireplace.
• 48:35
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: A fire in that fireplace?
• 48:40
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: A table saw.
• 48:44
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 48:46
  Speaker 1: A really badass Viking axe.
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 48:51
  Speaker 3: What else A better CPU?
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: You?
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: can have it.
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 48:53
  Speaker 1: Someone to mow the lawn for?
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: me, you can have it.
• 48:54
  Speaker 3: What else A better CPU?
• 48:55
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 48:56
  Speaker 1: Someone to mow the lawn for me.
• 48:58
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: The snow gone so that the lawn can actually grow.
• 49:04
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 49:07
  Speaker 1: A hot bath.
• 49:08
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: Pizza?
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: I'm really craving pizza right now.
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: What else To find where my mechanical pencil went?
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 49:16
  Speaker 1: What else To find where?
• 49:17
  Speaker 3: my mechanical pencil went.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: What else?
• 49:19
  Speaker 1: People to remember my birthday this year.
• 49:21
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: To one day be able to do a charity stream as big as Scotty's.
• 49:30
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: Peas I really want peas too On the pizza.
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: You can have it.
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: What else?
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: Peas I really want peas too On the pizza, you can have it.
• 49:37
  Speaker 1: What else I mean?
• 49:38
  Speaker 1: Maybe on the pizza We'll see A freshly brewed cup of coffee.
• 49:42
  Speaker 2: I need another cup of coffee.
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: I feel that right now.
• 49:44
  Speaker 3: Rob, you can have it and I love your desire.
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: Thank you for sharing.
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you for listening.
• 49:50
  Speaker 3: Of course, yeah, how's it feel doing it?
• 49:54
  Speaker 3: I mean, it's okay if you're like, like it feels stupid and I didn't like it.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: I liked it.
• 49:57
  Speaker 1: It was just letting it all out there.
• 50:00
  Speaker 1: I don't even remember half of what I said, but that's okay, I feel lighter.
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: I don't remember most of the things I say, so it works out pretty well.
• 50:08
  Speaker 2: It's all good.
• 50:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's funny.
• 50:11
  Speaker 3: The other thing I like about this exercise is that often I realize that many of the things I want are like not that big, you know.
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: Right, like the sunbeam with Pippin Exactly.
• 50:20
  Speaker 2: Why don't you get your pencil?
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to know what happened to that pencil it's a really good pencil.
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: It's like I can actually do that right after this.
• 50:29
  Speaker 3: I can have that, I have a desire and I can have a desire you know obtained.
• 50:33
  Speaker 3: Liam, do you want to try it?
• 50:34
  Speaker 3: No pressure.
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: I try.
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: I don't Do we need to do three minutes.
• 50:38
  Speaker 2: I don't know if I got three minutes.
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: We can do less.
• 50:41
  Speaker 3: It's whatever you want.
• 50:43
  Speaker 3: Do you want to?
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: give me a minute.
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: Give me a minute.
• 50:45
  Speaker 2: I feel like I can do a minute.
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: Put him on the clock for three, and if he's done, just let him be.
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: Either way, it all works.
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: All right.
• 50:53
  Speaker 3: Well, I want to suggest, if you're open to it, maybe a minute 30, because sometimes you find good things when you think you've run out.
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: Okay, sounds good.
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: Liam, what do you want?
• 51:04
  Speaker 2: I want to make people laugh.
• 51:08
  Speaker 3: You can have it.
• 51:09
  Speaker 2: What else?
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: I also want to make people worry less about shit they don't need to worry about.
• 51:15
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 51:18
  Speaker 2: I want to travel.
• 51:19
  Speaker 2: I want to go to other countries that aren't Canada.
• 51:22
  Speaker 2: You can have it.
• 51:23
  Speaker 2: What else?
• 51:24
  Speaker 2: I want to travel with my wife and I want more alone time.
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: I love my daughter, but we need more time to ourselves.
• 51:32
  Speaker 3: You can have it, what else?
• 51:38
  Speaker 2: I want to continue learning to ride the unicycle and be able to do more than just one shorts line you can have it what else?
• 51:44
  Speaker 2: I want to be able to add the juggling into the unicycle, because I want to be able to do both at the same time and not just one, because, yeah, you can have it, what else?
• 51:54
  Speaker 2: Uh, a cup of coffee.
• 51:57
  Speaker 2: Like rob said, I want that too, you can have it what?
• 52:00
  Speaker 2: else, I need new shorts because it's summer coming up and all my shorts suck when they're falling apart you can have it what?
• 52:08
  Speaker 2: Else, um more funko pops, even though I don't need them at all, you can have it.
• 52:13
  Speaker 2: What else hiking I want?
• 52:15
  Speaker 2: I want to go to place.
• 52:16
  Speaker 2: I want to hike places that have hiking you can have those places in canada.
• 52:21
  Speaker 2: No, that's right, I won't travel.
• 52:23
  Speaker 2: That's good.
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: I think that's good.
• 52:24
  Speaker 2: Let's do one more.
• 52:25
  Speaker 2: Okay, um, I want to um be in a movie, in a comedy, where I also make people laugh.
• 52:38
  Speaker 3: You can have it, Liam.
• 52:40
  Speaker 3: I love your desire.
• 52:41
  Speaker 3: Thank you for sharing.
• 52:43
  Speaker 2: Thank you for listening.
• 52:44
  Speaker 2: Yes, that's what it was.
• 52:45
  Speaker 3: Yes, thanks for doing something weird with me, guys.
• 52:48
  Speaker 2: Listen, weird's my.
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: I wish weird was my middle name.
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: I wanted to make my daughter's middle name Danger.
• 52:54
  Speaker 2: Hear me out here she's on the playground and she's doing something dangerous and they say don't do that, she.
• 53:00
  Speaker 2: She, she turns to them and goes don't worry, danger's my middle name and there's no way you can tell that kid ever get anything she would have to have like a mini recorder that allows her to play the bond sting.
• 53:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, you could play like the background well, I give her a little smartphone.
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: She'd have a little smartphone with her and she's just like a little button and she could play it at any point.
• 53:17
  Speaker 2: It's like its own app.
• 53:18
  Speaker 1: That would be amazing.
• 53:19
  Speaker 2: How cool would that be, come on, I mean, we gave her the middle name Valentine, and that's like good.
• 53:24
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's so sweet, it's a good middle name.
• 53:26
  Speaker 2: We came up with a good middle name.
• 53:36
  Speaker 3: But Danger's awesome too, though.
• 53:37
  Speaker 3: On man yeah, man, ever better be careful test and I steal it.
• 53:39
  Speaker 3: Well, I am all about, like you know, I don't have any kids, but I love the idea of like strange middle names because it's who uses a middle name who you?
• 53:44
  Speaker 3: You?
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: rarely ever use like a little spice.
• 53:46
  Speaker 2: You know that's I mean, I guess I use my middle name all the time, but I have a spicy middle name my middle name.
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: My middle name is Violet.
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: Oh, so it says.
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: Okay, I wasn't sure.
• 53:56
  Speaker 3: Oh okay, okay, that's good.
• 53:59
  Speaker 2: I mean see mine's Perry, like who gives a shit.
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: That's awful.
• 54:04
  Speaker 3: Like it's a fine name, but it's a middle name, come on.
• 54:06
  Speaker 3: Is it a family name?
• 54:08
  Speaker 2: I think it's my uncle.
• 54:09
  Speaker 2: Like so that's fine, it's cool, but like, I want a fun, I want a fun middle name.
• 54:18
  Speaker 3: It's you give your kids fun middle names.
• 54:19
  Speaker 3: That's all.
• 54:19
  Speaker 3: Let me tell you something, liam you can have it.
• 54:21
  Speaker 2: I mean I want to change my middle name to danger you can't do it.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: You could be liam danger I already.
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: I already my last name was hyphenated and I said that is awful, why would anyone do that to their kids?
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: And I changed it.
• 54:33
  Speaker 2: So I did do that.
• 54:34
  Speaker 2: Okay, good to know.
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: Good to know.
• 54:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, forget, it's annoying anyway yeah, I've heard that.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very annoying.
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: Don't do that to your kids.
• 54:42
  Speaker 2: Give them a fun middle name.
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: Don't hyphenate their last name.
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: That's the real moral of the story of this episode.
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: In moderation all right, good to know, don't be your worst but no, okay, maybe we you should tell people where to find you after this and all that good stuff.
• 54:56
  Speaker 3: Yes, hi everybody.
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: So I am everywhere you can find people.
• 55:01
  Speaker 3: I'm also on Twitch recently, but will you ever see me?
• 55:04
  Speaker 3: What I want you to know is that I am working on this beautiful new record and you will be able to hear that record probably.
• 55:23
  Speaker 3: I'll start putting out songs for it next year and until then, oh, actually text me.
• 55:28
  Speaker 3: Oh fuck, I just turned off my texting thing.
• 55:30
  Speaker 3: I don't want to pay for it anymore.
• 55:32
  Speaker 3: Okay, well, I don't know.
• 55:33
  Speaker 3: My name is Tessa.
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: Violet.
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: I'm not there.
• 55:34
  Speaker 3: Listen to my music.
• 55:35
  Speaker 3: Listen to the music.
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: Find me where music is found.
• 55:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Go to YouTube.
• 55:41
  Speaker 3: The music videos are cool.
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: Liam Liam.
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: What's your?
• 55:45
  Speaker 1: favorite Tessa Violet song.
• 55:46
  Speaker 2: My Body's my Buddy.
• 55:47
  Speaker 2: And that is the answer from someone who only knows one song.
• 55:52
  Speaker 2: I'm going to go with that one.
• 55:53
  Speaker 3: It's a good one.
• 55:53
  Speaker 3: It's a good one.
• 55:54
  Speaker 2: See, that's a good one.
• 55:55
  Speaker 2: I listened to it.
• 55:57
  Speaker 3: Yeah, can I play you a song to finish?
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely.
• 56:03
  Speaker 3: What I got a guitar right here.
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: Well, that's convenient.
• 56:07
  Speaker 3: I'm just adjusting the microphone.
• 56:08
  Speaker 3: I'm also realizing this will be the first time I sang today, so here's hoping, guys.
• 56:14
  Speaker 4: I have this image in my head I'm on a train going somewhere that I don't want to go.
• 56:22
  Speaker 4: To my left is the open air inviting me to jump out on the hill, but that'd be insane.
• 56:32
  Speaker 4: It's so much easier to be here on this train Going somewhere that I don't want to go.
• 56:39
  Speaker 4: And besides, what if I get off and find I like the new place even less?
• 56:44
  Speaker 4: Knowing this is not enough is enough.
• 56:53
  Speaker 4: Knowing this is not enough is enough.
• 57:03
  Speaker 4: I don't like the way it feels being here with you.
• 57:09
  Speaker 4: I can never tell what's real and what is true, but somewhere inside my body I am saying I don't want this anymore.
• 57:17
  Speaker 4: Once I've heard it, then I've heard it.
• 57:24
  Speaker 4: You can't stop me now.
• 57:26
  Speaker 4: I will honor and protect her.
• 57:28
  Speaker 4: I will not allow myself to squander one more day accepting less than she deserves, to squander one more day accepting less than she deserves.
• 57:40
  Speaker 4: Knowing this is not enough is enough.
• 57:43
  Speaker 4: Knowing this is not enough is enough Enough, my friend.
• 57:56
  Speaker 4: She says what's strange is nothing changes.
• 58:07
  Speaker 4: If nothing changes, changes.
• 58:15
  Speaker 4: Oh, oh.
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, oh.
• 58:27
  Speaker 4: Give yourself the grace to start again.
• 58:30
  Speaker 4: If it hurts, you put it down.
• 58:32
  Speaker 4: If it don't serve, you look around.
• 58:34
  Speaker 4: You're doing great, my babe, I swear you're gonna make it.
• 58:38
  Speaker 4: You never can know I could come and it's not done.
• 58:42
  Speaker 4: Until it's done.
• 58:43
  Speaker 4: You're doing great, my babe, I swear you're gonna make it.
• 58:47
  Speaker 4: I can do hard things, parallel, parallel parking, like it all.
• 58:57
  Speaker 4: It just takes Practicing.
• 59:00
  Speaker 4: I can walk a new path.
• 59:07
  Speaker 4: I can get myself back.
• 59:12
  Speaker 4: I can learn to be a better friend.
• 59:16
  Speaker 4: Give myself the grace to try again.
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: Well, she can't hear us, but we are clapping.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: She can see us clapping.
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: I'm just going to keep clapping until she puts her headphones back on, there we go.
• 59:51
  Speaker 3: This is not the end of the story.
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: But this might be the end of the podcast.
• 59:55
  Speaker 3: But it is the end of the story.
• 59:56
  Speaker 3: But this might be the end of the podcast, but it is the end of the podcast.
• 59:59
  Speaker 3: Thank you, guys, so much for having me on.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 3: This was delightful.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 3: Thank you for letting me be as strange as I am.
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 3: I am an insane person and I love getting to be one.
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: I think, that should be everybody's goal.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: You need to be a little insane in this world, you have to be.
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 2: You can't go through.
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 2: There's no way you're going.