Latest / Celeste The Therapist / EP 516 Practical Grounding Methods to Combat Anxiety
Transcript
- 0:02Hey, thank you all so much for joining another episode of Celeste the
- 0:05therapist podcast. My name is Celeste. I'm a therapist from Boston. If
- 0:09you've never tried out any of my episodes, what
- 0:13I do on this podcast is I talk about things that we go through. And
- 0:17I kind of walk you in ways that you can deal with it. Originally,
- 0:21I started in 2018, where I was talking to people that
- 0:24were doing things to empower the lives of others and
- 0:28over the years, the last couple years I've changed
- 0:32it because I opened a wellness center in Stoughton, Massachusetts
- 0:37and I didn't have the capacity to interview people but eventually
- 0:40I want to get back to there. So right now you get these nice short
- 0:44episodes today. We're talking about grounding techniques
- 0:48So I've been away for a few weeks. I took some time off
- 0:52and I went to the country of Ghana and
- 0:56I had such an amazing time being around people
- 1:00learning the history of Ghana and
- 1:03the liberation just all the ways that
- 1:09I think that trip came at a really great time due
- 1:13to the nature of the work that I'm doing. It
- 1:17just helped me feel more motivated just thinking about all
- 1:20the leaders before me that has
- 1:23done so much work to try to educate and liberate people
- 1:28from the shackles of like white supremacy and
- 1:33all of the things that are happening in this country, in America.
- 1:38I've struggled with a lot and, you
- 1:42know, it doesn't deter me from what I'm doing. It actually motivates
- 1:46me to do more, but also just thinking about all the
- 1:49people that have come before me and
- 1:52have done amazing work. It just really was very inspiring. and
- 1:57encouraging. So at the
- 2:00Wellness Center, we have classes that take place every
- 2:05month. We've just added sound healing as a regular rotation.
- 2:09So if that's something that you're interested in, if you go to stwyt.com,
- 2:14you could find the links for the classes that are coming
- 2:18up and future classes, and you can sign up. So
- 2:21grounding techniques, what I decided to talk
- 2:24about this, During the trip, my
- 2:28children were going on
- 2:32a separate vacation and there were some logistical things
- 2:35that needed to take place and I wasn't even in
- 2:39the country. And the way my mind started
- 2:42spiraling about worst case scenarios really
- 2:46had my stomach tight And one night
- 2:49I couldn't sleep. It was when I first got there. I couldn't
- 2:54sleep and I was able to recognize what was going on.
- 2:57My mind was creating scenarios. The thing with humans is
- 3:00that we're the only species that can activate our amygdala
- 3:06with the way that we think about things. So
- 3:10for instance, animals, the prey comes and then they can go back to
- 3:13baseline and they don't create scenarios in
- 3:17their head about what could happen. Their system is at
- 3:20rest, right? For me, for us, our
- 3:24mind has access to the experiences that's been in the past. Um,
- 3:28it can create crazy scenarios the same way it
- 3:31created like crazy scenarios that caused me to be feel so
- 3:34anxious. Our mind can also create amazing scenarios that can
- 3:38show us like our goals and how like, and that's literally, I've
- 3:42talked about this before, but when it comes to the trajectory and
- 3:46the way that I operate is because I continue to visualize myself
- 3:50in a different space, right? I continue the goals that I have.
- 3:53I continue to picture it in my head. And so my
- 3:56mind is always able to look for the opportunities for
- 3:59me to get to that place. Um, so, you know,
- 4:03I had this like, kind of like struggle, my stomach was
- 4:06turning, I was anxious, I couldn't sleep. And I woke up early
- 4:10and I tried to do a body scan meditation.
- 4:16Um, and, um, that didn't work. Right. And
- 4:19so I, um, found it, uh, meditation.
- 4:23I typed it on YouTube, uh, meditation for anxiety and
- 4:27this nice five minute anxiety meditation came up. And
- 4:32part of it, we was affirming, I'm here, I'm okay, right? Like,
- 4:36I know logically I'm okay, but emotionally, my mind
- 4:39thinking about all these crazy scenarios, I'm across the world and
- 4:44unable to get to them. That's one of the areas that with my,
- 4:47the way I struggle with anxiety, when it comes to my children, where they're not in
- 4:51my presence, my mind can literally go into like all of these
- 4:54crazy scenarios. And so I was thinking like, I
- 4:58have all of these tools that I use that
- 5:01helps me when I find myself struggling. And
- 5:05the effects that it has on me is rather quickly because
- 5:09in general, I am not operating from
- 5:12an anxious standpoint. So it's easier for me to
- 5:15gravitate towards some of these practices and find
- 5:19immediate relief. I do, I'm gonna share these practices,
- 5:23but I also want you to know that sometimes when
- 5:27you've been in this like space for a long time struggling that
- 5:30you may not be able to get that immediate relief. So
- 5:34I do as I'm talking about these things I want you to think about like
- 5:38how can I add these as a regular practice into my
- 5:41life kind of like medicine thinking about it like that because the
- 5:44things that I do when I find myself struggling are
- 5:48things that I already do on a regular basis. So it's
- 5:51easier for my system to acclimate to what I'm
- 5:54trying to show it. So one of
- 5:59the things I'm thinking about is 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. And
- 6:03these are really good too if you find yourself struggling
- 6:07in the moment and you need something really quick. So this
- 6:115, 4, 3, 2, 1 method is five things you can see. So you literally, let's say you're
- 6:15finding yourself struggling and you're not able to ground. You
- 6:18look for five things you can see. Four things
- 6:22that you can touch, right? So you literally will go and, you
- 6:25know, here's my water bottle, here's my table, here's my computer, right?
- 6:29Because what's happening is doing that is allowing your system to ground. Two
- 6:33things that you can smell, right? I have some lotion on, I have this
- 6:36hand sanitizer here. If I squirt it, I'll smell that, right? It's bringing
- 6:40me into the present. And then one thing that you can taste, right?
- 6:43If you have a peppermint, those are great. Gum, even
- 6:47if it's water or a drink, like, Those 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, you're
- 6:52using your senses to bring you back into the present. And
- 6:56you may say, but what do you mean back into the present? I am in the present. Yeah,
- 6:59like you're physically here, but consciously we don't be
- 7:03here sometimes. And those are things that you
- 7:06can do to help you kind of get back
- 7:10into the moment, especially if you're finding yourself ungrounded, right?
- 7:15If you find yourself like, for instance, if you're driving somewhere on
- 7:18the bus system or train system and you're like, oh my gosh, I'm
- 7:21already there. That's your mind kind of like, going
- 7:25into another space. And I do want to preface it,
- 7:28like some people, a lot of people have had to
- 7:32survive by escaping mentally, right? As a
- 7:35child. And so even as an adult, you can find yourself
- 7:38doing that, finding yourself escaping. Sometimes that's
- 7:42the only thing you've had access to. And as an
- 7:45adult, when you have a lot of responsibilities and things, it just doesn't work,
- 7:49right? Escaping may have been a norm. You may not even realize
- 7:52that you've been doing it because it's what you do, but just be
- 7:56mindful of that. So that's one of the ways. Another way that
- 7:59you can access like getting grounded really quickly is
- 8:03literally by deep breathing. If
- 8:06you go on youtube.com, you can type in like
- 8:10breathing circle. There's a circle where it will go in and
- 8:13out like that, right? I say breathe in, breathe
- 8:18out. Breathe in,
- 8:25breathe out. Like something
- 8:28as simple as creating this
- 8:32intentional time to breathe deeply, right? Because you
- 8:36may say, Celeste, I'm already breathing. But are you intentionally breathing?
- 8:40A lot of times when we're struggling, our breathing is really
- 8:43labored. And again,
- 8:47like your system is not designed to work on overtime. A
- 8:50lot of times our system is in overtime and we find ourselves
- 8:54struggling to breathe. You may not realize it, but
- 8:58like just how I did like that, like I can tell in
- 9:01those moments, it doesn't have to be about me being anxious. It could be me
- 9:05rushing or feeling overwhelmed. And then I'll realize it
- 9:08and I'll be like, all right. take a deep breath, right? Sometimes
- 9:11when people come on the screen with me when I'm working with people, because most of my sessions are
- 9:15virtual, and they'll come on and be like, yeah, I got all this going on.
- 9:19I was like, all right, hold on. Let's just take a breath, right? And it's
- 9:22so amazing, because it's like, wow, I really needed that breath, right? I
- 9:26really needed that pause. So many times we're just in the
- 9:30hustle and bustle, and we're not creating moments to
- 9:33pause. And it's not healthy for our
- 9:36system. We need to pause. If a car just
- 9:40ran all the time, eventually it shuts down. Your computer
- 9:43system, my computer system, if it's on too much,
- 9:48it gets too hot and it closes off, right? So
- 9:52really being mindful of like taking moments to breathe
- 9:55deeply. Another practice is like a body scan.
- 9:59And as I told you, when I was super overwhelmed and anxious, I
- 10:03did a body scan meditation where it kind of
- 10:07took me from the top of my head to the bottom of my
- 10:10feet. And, um, that didn't help. I needed more
- 10:14words, you know? Um, and so with the
- 10:17body scan, it's kind of like, pay attention to your
- 10:20mouth. Are you clenching your teeth? Right. Um, relax your
- 10:24fingers. Like a lot of times you don't realize like your wound up type.
- 10:27Some of us, like if you're watching me on YouTube, like, your
- 10:30shoulders are high and you're like, you're like
- 10:34this, right? Tensed up. And you don't even realize you're
- 10:37tensed up because you're always tensed up. And that being tensed
- 10:41up, guess what? It not just affects you physically, internally, it
- 10:45affects the way you're projecting on things and people and
- 10:50the way you're looking at life. If you're always bound up, how do
- 10:53you, Find any like freedom or peace in life
- 10:57if your whole physical symptom is system is
- 11:00wound up So that's number three. Another great
- 11:04activity is mindfully walking. So literally Going
- 11:09outside letting the Sun hit your face even
- 11:12it like taking your shoes off and letting your feet hit the
- 11:16ground and right? Like literally like looking at
- 11:19what, where you're walking, you may have noticed, like, look at the
- 11:22flowers there, right? Paying attention and mindfully walking.
- 11:26So that means don't get on your phone. Like don't talk to
- 11:29anybody, right? Just be alone with you and
- 11:33your own space. You
- 11:37know, the phones and the social media piece can
- 11:40be helpful with distracting. But we can't
- 11:44allow ourselves to be distracted all the time. Right. We
- 11:48have to like society is not going to remind us like, hey, did
- 11:51you do that grounding thing? Did you do X, Y, Z? Society
- 11:55will not remind us of this is something that you really have to
- 11:58be intentional about. And the things that I talk about
- 12:02are free, like it's intentional for me. This is an
- 12:05intentional thing that I do when I talk about ways to work through things.
- 12:09I talk about ways where it doesn't cost money, because I
- 12:12really want people to feel empowered after they listen to these episodes, so
- 12:16that they can feel like, you know what, I can start the process today. It
- 12:21doesn't have to be about next Monday or next year or the top
- 12:24of the month. It can literally be like,
- 12:28I can start this process today. So mindfully walking
- 12:32is another great way to ground. And again, as I'm talking about these
- 12:35things, look at it as medicine. How can I incorporate this
- 12:38into my life on a regular basis? Grounding objects,
- 12:43right? Sometimes people, I'm just looking at my desk to see what I have. People
- 12:46may have something that they can use to help them stay grounded.
- 12:51Um, so it could be textured right? This is I don't even know what
- 12:54this is. I think this is a capture my ink Um,
- 12:57it could be something that's textured where you can hold it.
- 13:01Um, Sometimes people may have like a bracelet or something on
- 13:04them that has like different kind of grooves and nooks to them Um,
- 13:08and they touch it like if you're feeling nervous, you'll just kind of touch it.
- 13:12Um people that I that I work with that like will pick their
- 13:16skin or their hair, pull their hair. I'll talk about
- 13:19these mechanisms that they can use a rubber band to grab
- 13:24and just like touch and pop
- 13:27to help you get back into the moment, right? The stress
- 13:31that we feel for so many different reasons will cause us
- 13:35to, we'll find ourselves escaping in
- 13:38different ways. And sometimes it looks like pulling your
- 13:42hair or picking your skin or
- 13:46your fingers, right? Like there's so many things that you're doing
- 13:49that you don't realize you're doing when you're doing it. And
- 13:52you're like, oh my gosh, how did this bald spot get here? Or how did
- 13:56my fingers started bleeding, right? So my
- 13:59goal in you listening to this is to help you see like, okay,
- 14:03yeah, maybe I'm not as grounded as I could be, but these are
- 14:06some things that I can do to work on starting the process, right?
- 14:10Because when we talk about this stuff to our
- 14:13PCPs Doctors, a lot of times, the
- 14:17first course of action is medicine, and medicine's great.
- 14:20It has its power, and it's definitely a
- 14:23great tool, but it shouldn't be
- 14:27the first tool of action. I want people to try the
- 14:30things that they can do, and if those aren't working, all right, let's talk about medicine. The
- 14:35next thing is journaling. Great
- 14:38tool, right? You see that 365, I have
- 14:42a journal that I created, a really cool journal. Let
- 14:45me just grab it really quick. So this journal is,
- 14:50I created it back in 2018, well,
- 14:55before the podcast, so I think 2017. And I basically
- 14:59am asking you different questions and asking you how
- 15:02you're feeling. So do you find yourself stressing over, yo,
- 15:06what are the odds of this? Y'all see me just open this book up.
- 15:11If you're watching me on YouTube, I just grabbed it. This is
- 15:16crazy, because this is what we're talking about.
- 15:19This is so crazy that I just opened it up to this. But anyways, do
- 15:23you find yourself stressing over things that are not in your control? If
- 15:27you do not have control over it, learn how to let it go. And then
- 15:31day 130 says, imagine how intentional your life
- 15:34can be if you start thinking, before you act.
- 15:39And so some of these are questions and some of them are statements. Like
- 15:42these two were statements and day 143 is
- 15:46a question. Because we can pride ourselves on being strong, we fail
- 15:49to realize how our broken pieces in life have hindered us.
- 15:53We continue to grow physically, but mentally we are stuck. Do you find
- 15:57yourself being stuck? So like these statements every
- 16:00day are designed to help you really think about
- 16:04some areas of your life that you may not have thought about. And
- 16:08so the halfway, so it's 365 days,
- 16:11right? Halfway through the year or halfway through this
- 16:14book, it resets the question. And so
- 16:18the question you get on day one, you'll get on like day
- 16:22160 something, and it'd be that same question, but then you can
- 16:25see how you've grown over the last six months, right? So
- 16:29that was the design of it. I always think about people that can't afford
- 16:32therapy, and even if you can't afford therapy, can't find a good therapist, and
- 16:37find yourself feeling stuck. I think about these things as I do
- 16:40this podcast and the things that I've created. So that's
- 16:44an example of a journal. There are many journals out
- 16:47there. Again, there's also a notebook and a
- 16:50pen, just grabbing that and checking in
- 16:54with yourself about how you're feeling, what went
- 16:57well today, what do I need to do to prepare for tomorrow, and
- 17:02what am I grateful for? Those four questions, if you
- 17:06listened to this podcast before, those are questions that I ask my
- 17:09kids every night because I want to help them get more into
- 17:12the moment. Thinking about gratitude is really hard. to find
- 17:15yourself in a dark place constantly when you are bringing gratitude into
- 17:19your life. Having a nature connection
- 17:22is really helpful for grounding, trying to get
- 17:26into nature. I have
- 17:30a hiking trail not far from my house that I can go to. Even
- 17:34if you don't have a hiking trail, if there's a garden, right? If
- 17:37you have plants in your house, outside, touching
- 17:40a tree, um water if you if you're near
- 17:44any water right i have a little like pond that's
- 17:48not far from my house that even just driving by it's just
- 17:51like i breathe different it's crazy the energy that
- 17:54nature holds um affirmations is another grounding
- 17:58technique um i told you at the top of the podcast how
- 18:01i was struggling and thinking worst case scenarios the
- 18:05body scan wasn't helpful but then The
- 18:10next thing I listened to around anxiety was more affirming that
- 18:13I was okay. And I love sharing the
- 18:16ways that I struggle because I talk a lot about the
- 18:20way we can work through things. and how
- 18:24to make things work and what I do in life to work on myself. But
- 18:28I also want you to know, regardless of how much work you do, life
- 18:32is going to life at times, and you're going to have these experiences. And
- 18:37these are things you can do to help work through those experiences.
- 18:42The last grounding technique I want you to think about is just physical movement.
- 18:47If you follow me on Instagram or my stories, You
- 18:50know, I walk, I'll talk about like, I don't feel like walking, but
- 18:54I'm walking. And a lot of the things
- 18:57that I do are so part of my routine that
- 19:02regardless of how I feel, I do it anyway. Payroll has
- 19:05to be made every other week. I'm making sure
- 19:09I'm doing that, right? As a business owner
- 19:12now, there are just a lot of logistical things that are on my plate
- 19:16that I don't necessarily always feel like doing, but I do it because I
- 19:19know I need to get paid. So financially and
- 19:23literally, I think we tend to do that. But when
- 19:26it comes to our individual selves and our individual growth, I don't think
- 19:29we do that enough. I don't think we actually work on
- 19:33doing things based off of what we need. We end up doing
- 19:37it how we feel. We know that we should
- 19:41be getting up early for work so we're not
- 19:44rushing in traffic. But what do we do? We snooze because it
- 19:48feels good to stay in bed. And then now we're rushing into
- 19:51work. And so we're literally starting our day on the wrong foot because
- 19:56now our system is in this anxious state. If
- 19:59I sacrifice the extra sleep, and
- 20:02got up early, even though it didn't feel good, then I'll find myself slowly
- 20:07rolling into work and not feeling the pressure of the anxiety
- 20:10from the morning, right? So a lot of times we will sacrifice and
- 20:15get that little bit of extra sleep or get that little bit of extra something,
- 20:19but then it doesn't really help us throughout the day. not
- 20:22taking that extra sleep doesn't feel good because I enjoy my
- 20:26bed and I enjoy sleeping in, but also what doesn't feel
- 20:29good is not getting the things that I need to get done done. So
- 20:33I just want you to take away from today some
- 20:37things that you can think about implementing into your life, some
- 20:41practices that you can think about trying that
- 20:44can help you get more aligned with where you say you want
- 20:47to be, When people tell me like, oh, I'm trying to change
- 20:51that or I'm trying to do this. I said, what does that realistically look like?
- 20:55Saying you're trying and actually putting something
- 20:58in place are two different things. I think mentally we want
- 21:02it to be different, so we're trying, right? But literally,
- 21:05are we doing anything different? So really
- 21:09be mindful of the choices that you're choosing to make,
- 21:12really being mindful of the medicine that you're taking. Even if
- 21:16you're taking literal pills, that's totally fine. I still
- 21:19want you to think about adding these other medicines to your
- 21:24routine. And so you can see the power that
- 21:27you have, right? A lot of times we can't see the power that
- 21:30we have, but we haven't been taught how to access it.
- 21:34and being in Ghana and just learning about the ways that
- 21:38a lot of the practices were stripped from black people. They had
- 21:42the things that they were doing and they
- 21:45introduced church, right? And it was
- 21:48so crazy how the female slave dungeon
- 21:52was downstairs and there was a church upstairs and the horrible things
- 21:56that they were doing to these people while they said, hey, you
- 21:59can't do none of your practices. Here's our church practice. and
- 22:03we're beating you as well, and we're doing all these horrible things to you. It
- 22:06really made me think about things and take a pause. There's
- 22:11a lot of ways that even if you're in therapy, that
- 22:16pain is stuck in your body. I created this wellness center
- 22:20and these somatic classes because I recognize there's such
- 22:23a disconnect with the way that our society talks
- 22:27about wellness with psychiatry and therapy only, but not
- 22:30bringing the physical part. There's something powerful about coupling
- 22:34up this process of healing with some somatic work
- 22:39and really like Getting into some kind of system
- 22:42and routine. So I gave you a lot to think about Um,
- 22:46and so what I want you to take away from this is like, okay What can I
- 22:49start implementing today? Right? Can I get up and go if you
- 22:52have time now? Can I just go for a walk today? Not getting on
- 22:56my phone just walking mindfully if you haven't been walking i'm asking you
- 22:59for five minutes. Just give yourself five minutes Um, can I
- 23:02do the five four three two one method right pay attention get
- 23:06myself grounded? Can I do the two minute? Breathing meditation,
- 23:10right? These little things that you may think
- 23:13is not a big deal. They are huge They add up you're making deposits
- 23:17into your life that starts to add up those little deposits
- 23:21start to feel differently So I just want to
- 23:24challenge you to do that So if anything I say resonates understand
- 23:28you have the power to create change But first you got
- 23:31to have faith to believe in yourself and when you have faith and when you start believing in
- 23:35yourself I promise you no one could ever take that away
- 23:38from you you so don't forget follow me everywhere on social media as
- 23:41Celeste the therapist or you can follow my wellness page
- 23:45at STWYT and that stands for shifting the
- 23:48way you think you can visit our website at STWYT.com to
- 23:53learn more about the Wellness Center and to sign up for a class
- 23:57until next time beautiful people I will talk to you