Latest / Giving Pain Purpose with Lyndsay Soprano / Running a Business While Battling Cancer with Deb Krier

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Running a Business While Battling Cancer with Deb Krier · Giving Pain Purpose with Lyndsay Soprano

• Lyndsay Soprano (00:01.112) So I have been running a busy marketing agency for almost 25 years until I decided to retire in October. what I found is that I am busier than I ever was. And that is like insane how that's humanly possible. And I always made fun of my parents, kind of scoffed at them when they had said the same thing after they retired. But a great deal of what I spend my time on now is this show that you're listening to. And if you're watching a little bit of it on our shorts on YouTube, thank you very much for doing so. But the rest of the time that I'm spending on in my life is actually taking care of my body and working in pain every moment, which blows. Because it certainly isn't because I'm out golfing, right? So one of the reasons that I did decide to retire was I was just sick and tired of my clients, not because I did not love them, not because they had not been loyal to me for some of them over a decade, 15 years. I they'd been with me for a long time, but I was sick and tired of working on projects that I had zero interest in anymore. And I had like kind of lost my marketing mojo, if you will. And my work was starting to reflect on that. And that was where I had to say, forget it. And pain was also the number one culprit. in making this decision, unfortunately, because it's really hard to focus on things that you love to do when you live in this kind of pain. But it's really, really difficult to focus on things you don't want to do when you live in this world of pain and chaos. I mean, it is serious chaos in my life, guys. The impact of pain on my daily life and my relationships is intense. And it's super fuck straighting. And I know my guest loves this word because she learned it from me and you're welcome, Hotlanta. So today we're going to chat with my guests about a bunch of stuff. But one thing we're going to talk about is being courageous when you're facing cancer. All right. We're going to talk a little bit about our scars, having scars, how we work through that, managing chronic pain, how living is the only cure for anything that ails us, quite frankly. Like we're sitting here every day trying not to die. Lyndsay Soprano (02:13.996) becoming and running a business as a certified integrative cancer advisor and being okay with not being okay. And that is something that's really hard for me. I struggle with that big time, because I fake it until I make it. I mean, that's just what I do. without further ado, I'd like to introduce you to my guest today, Deb Creer. Hello, my love. The music from Hotlanta just showed up. Deb Krier (02:38.925) You I know. Not at all. Lyndsay Soprano (02:44.344) She's got all kinds of weather issues in Hotlander right now. So if she dips out, we're gonna bring her back in. So it's all gonna be good to go. my God. Well, you're something girlfriend. It's not dippy. All right, let me bring you in. So Deb is an entrepreneur, cancer advocate and founder of trying not to die dot live, live, L-I-V-E, right? That's what we're trying to do. With over 20 years of experience in communications and marketing, Deb now uses her professional expertise. Deb Krier (02:46.615) I know. Yeah, and I am kind of dippy, so I mean, you know. Deb Krier (03:05.517) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (03:13.986) personal journey as a stage four breast cancer survivor amongst many other things that she has survived to support others facing this horrible beast that is cancer. As a certified integrative cancer advisor, she helps professionals lead with strength, resilience, and authenticity through treatment and beyond. Her approach blends honesty, heart, and humor to empower others to live fully no matter what the diagnosis. So all right, babe, I am rolling out the red carpet for you. Deb Krier (03:41.727) humor. No, no, we don't do humor at all. Lyndsay Soprano (03:44.14) We do not laugh, we do not have any fun around here, no matter how bad we're feeling, forget it. So I'd like to start with when you were diagnosed with stage four breast cancer, and then let's take it from there. Deb Krier (03:54.199) Mm-hmm. So I was initially diagnosed stage zero, then they changed it to stage three, and then they went, crap, it's actually stage four. And stage four is considered not curable. Now it may or may not kill me, may or may not ever come back, but I have hit, ready? The 10 year mark, right? And 10 years is a really big deal. so yeah, mean somewhere right around now was when I was initially diagnosed. And... It was kind of one of those because when I was first told I had cancer, it was like, I'm sorry, I don't have time for this. No, no, no. Right. I told my doctor that and she looked at me like, well, honey, you have to make time. And it was just, it was rude. really was because we don't ever think something like that is going to happen. And the funny thing was I was actually diagnosed with stage four when I was in the hospital trying to not die. And they said, yeah, you know, there's. Lyndsay Soprano (04:30.826) Nope. Uh-uh. Lyndsay Soprano (04:45.228) Not to us. Deb Krier (04:54.177) there's something else going on. And, you know, we did more fun tests and they said, yeah, you know, let's, let's just say stage four and, and, and not deal with this anymore. and so, yeah, it was, it's been a wild and really bumpy, but fun ride. Lyndsay Soprano (05:11.564) No pun intended on the bumps, ladies. No pun intended. Deb Krier (05:13.847) I I know, I know, I don't got those no more. Lyndsay Soprano (05:16.984) Squeeze your boobies, squeeze them. So, okay, so going from zero to four is very fast when you're talking about cancer diagnosis. And I know that you went through a ton of challenging treatments that came with that and you've dealt with kidney disease and skin cancer. You've got thyroid stuff going on. Can you talk a little bit more about what you're dealing with from a chronic pain perspective that came from all of this and what you are doing to basically try to keep living? Deb Krier (05:19.477) Hmm Deb Krier (05:24.365) Wait! Deb Krier (05:37.293) Right. Yeah. So one of the drugs that I take is a drug called letrazole. And I take that because it's a hormone supplement type E thingy. And now I should be getting off of it later this year because you only take it for 10 years. And you know, when they say now may cause yada yada yada yada, there's no may. Yes, it yes, it says it will cause bone pain and osteoporosis. Lyndsay Soprano (06:03.768) 72,000 things and some of them are gonna come out of your butt. Lyndsay Soprano (06:11.16) Hmm. Deb Krier (06:13.101) And so it's like, well, gee, that was fun. And anybody I've ever talked to who is on letrozole has said, yeah, the bone pain. it's your pelvic region, your lower back, sometimes your thighs, it's the big bones, right? And for anybody who's wondering, letrozole is the version of tamoxifen that is given for older people. So if a woman has been through menopause, Lyndsay Soprano (06:39.48) Well that ain't you Hotlana. Deb Krier (06:40.971) Yeah, if those ovaries are no longer working, then you get letrasal. But yeah, mean, so it did cause osteoporosis. I now get prolia injections and the chronic pain. And then as part of my treatment, I developed septic shock. That was part of that, golly, almost tried to die thing. And it did cause kidney disease. We're not going to go towards kidney failure. it might at some point. But and of course that's lower back also right and so yeah I mean it's just when I love it when they say so Lindsay what is your pain level you know like when you've done something and I tell them well you understand it's always there you know and and so you know when it spikes that's when you know crap you know I spent an hour today this morning when I should have been working in the recliner with the heating pad because my back went nope Lyndsay Soprano (07:16.61) Sir. Lyndsay Soprano (07:24.044) I hate it. All the happy faces. Deb Krier (07:40.332) Nope, it's Monday. We don't care that you have a bunch of stuff to do. You're gonna, you're gonna pause. yeah, yep. Yes, because we had to, right? and so, you know, it's, it is weird to always have that level of pain. Now, most of time, mine is like a one or a two. So just kind of like little gnats, right? It's there, but I can ignore it. Lyndsay Soprano (07:45.026) but you're gonna pause long enough to make sure that you show up for Lindsay today. So thank you for doing so. Deb Krier (08:06.955) but then it will spike and it will go up to a seven or an eight. I've done the one to 10 scale, I've done the 15s, but most of the time it's just an annoyance and it's there, but it's kind of this edge that is always there. And I'll realize, wow, today was a really good day. I didn't have to stop. But that's not gonna happen very often. Lyndsay Soprano (08:37.388) Yeah, they come few and far between. I know with me, you would never guess by looking at me or watching me go the way I go around this house. And even if I'm in my wheelchair, I'm going as fast as I possibly can. I'm throwing laundry in the laundry basket. I've always lived hard. I've always lived fast. And this has slowed me down for sure and has pulled me away from being able to do some of the many things that I love. Deb Krier (08:45.754) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (08:56.653) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (09:01.826) Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (09:03.34) But I have faith, I have days that I don't, but most of my days are very hopeful or very faithful. What do you do when you have those days where you're like, I'm out? Like I cannot handle this kind of pain and suffering anymore. What do you do? Deb Krier (09:06.647) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (09:16.949) Yeah Deb Krier (09:22.807) Well, first give yourself grace and know that, you know, it's going to happen. It's not anything you did now. That said, there are times where I have overdone, you know, and all of those things, but it's not like you're trying. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you're not trying to put yourself in pain. but yeah. So give yourself the grace and then know, okay, here's what I need to do. I need to do a full stop or I need to back off or I need to tell somebody, Hey, this isn't happening today. Lyndsay Soprano (09:33.982) Of course. I pushed it too hard today. Yeah. Deb Krier (09:52.914) you know, and, that's okay to do that and, just know, you know, and I mean, like it's, it's a challenge because we want to keep going, right? Like you said, the worst things for me are when I am in pain and I make the face, right? The, and my husband panics, you know, because he's been through all of this with me and he's like, what do I need to do? Yeah. Lyndsay Soprano (10:18.88) My sweetie must be living in a state of panic every minute of his life. Deb Krier (10:22.305) Yeah, you know, and it's like, I just need a little bit of time to myself. You know, and the cats know that one of my dogs, it was really funny, this was, you I was having one of those nine days and he came and he just laid on my chest. He does not do that. And, you know, and so there he was. And I thought, well, this is very comforting and this is very sweet, but I can't breathe. Lyndsay Soprano (10:48.0) Right, well, and I've got my little Tommy. He is my emotional support puppy. I swear to God, if a tear is even thinking about coming out of my eye and he's downstairs and I'm upstairs, that little weenie just fricking comes to my rescue. He just knows, and I love that about animals in general. They're so good for our wellbeing and our health. Deb Krier (10:52.813) Yes. yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. I was looking through Facebook and I like the Facebook memory section, right? And so, yes, I know there are times where I'm like, yes, I know. Lyndsay Soprano (11:18.776) And they've been out of control lately. They're like, I'm getting an email like 17 times a day about all of my dead dogs and my ex-husband. I'm like, wow, thank you. Do you know how much therapy I've had to get rid of some of this memory you're throwing at me, Facebook? Deb Krier (11:22.685) Mm hmm. Yes, I know. you're like, yeah. So Facebook reminded me that, I know. I know. And the nice thing is you can tell it. And I don't ever want to see this again. But it reminded me that yesterday, a year ago yesterday, I had my sixth kidney surgery in 10 years. And but what I had posted on Facebook is the cat so misty. Lyndsay Soprano (11:37.281) Right. Lyndsay Soprano (11:45.311) Whoa! Deb Krier (11:51.478) was very concerned. And so I have this picture and she's like right here and she kept just patting. Are you okay? Hello? Hello? And it was very sweet and I was like, I need to trim your nails. Lyndsay Soprano (11:58.828) Yeah. Lyndsay Soprano (12:04.972) This part has been dedicated to all of the cat people that are in our lives. Deb Krier (12:08.958) Yes, yes, mm-hmm, yes. You know, and the dogs, right? You know, they know, they know when something's going on. But yeah, there was Misty, are you okay? Are you gonna be able to feed me? Right, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, right. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yes. Lyndsay Soprano (12:21.694) And they do help us through, certainly through any emotional and pain and all of that, which is part of giving my body some grace is straight up. Like I was in the hospital in and out for the past couple of weeks. And so I've had to do some stuff for my show that I've had to shift around and thank you to everybody that needed to work around my schedule a little bit over the past two weeks, you being one of them. thank you so much. But it's just, it's been challenging where you're talking about what's your pain level at. I'm like, don't. Deb Krier (12:33.229) Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (12:36.673) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (12:47.105) Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (12:49.476) me anymore. Like it hasn't changed from the moment I walked in here and from six hours later. That's not why I'm here right now. I'm here because I blacked out and I don't remember at seven o'clock in the morning why I had a headache that felt like a lightning bolt or someone hit me on the back of the head and I hit and then I was out cold and so I went through all the gamut of tests and spinal tap that went awry and just went like on and on and on. Deb Krier (12:57.121) Right. Deb Krier (13:03.191) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Nice! Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (13:14.988) Here I am trying to get some time to rest, right? And it ends up being that it has to be in a hospital. And you know how restful hospitals are. They're terrible. Deb Krier (13:17.633) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, right, right. But sometimes it is, because you don't have the critters. Great. Lyndsay Soprano (13:26.398) You don't have the critters, don't have your phone, you don't have your laptop, you don't have a calendar, you're just kind of laying there. And I had to lay flat on my back, so I was looking up at the ceiling the entire time and I'm like, this is the worst. But I have really good support. I have really good village of people that are around me and you do too. And I think that's part of us getting through it too. So, all right. So let's talk about, let's move into balancing. Deb Krier (13:37.354) Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (13:53.558) the work world and the entrepreneurship and all that through battling cancer. And I think this applies to not just cancer, but I think this applies for anybody that lives in chronic pain like myself that is battling cancer, that's battling whatever we're battling, because we're all battling something. And you have come in and you've started to work as an advisor to people, helping them to continue to run their businesses in the mess of their chaotic cancerous life. Can you talk about that a little bit? Deb Krier (13:58.03) Wait. Deb Krier (14:14.349) Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. So anytime we're told, hey, you have a serious illness, we're like, no. I mean, like we joked about it at the start. No, I'm sorry. I don't have time for that. But if you're a business owner or a senior executive, you're really thinking, my God, no, I have this business. I have all these people and these clients who are relying on me. And yada, yada, yada, yada, yada, yada, yada. And what do you mean I have to be gone every Thursday? Lyndsay Soprano (14:26.174) Right, no I don't, no I don't. Next. Lyndsay Soprano (14:33.003) Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (14:42.495) I you just all of those things. And I can't talk to anybody about it because they're going to think I'm weak. They're going to think I can't run my company. You know, they're going to take their business elsewhere. They're going to go get another job. And I don't know what to do. You know, and so that's where I can help because, you know, they can talk to me and I'm certainly not going to tell anybody what's going on. But a lot of what I talk to them about are simple, basic business things. that we don't always consider as a business owner, right? Do you have a business continuity plan? And if they look at me and go, well, what's it? Then that means they don't have one. Yeah, you know, and yeah, and they're like, huh? And, know, and I got a template, all that good stuff. And of course they don't give me that information because that's got their attorneys, that's got their bank account. mean, that's got all that stuff. But you know, it's also, you know, have you empowered your employees? Do you know that? Do you know how to delegate? Lyndsay Soprano (15:17.154) I don't even, how do you spell continuity? Lyndsay Soprano (15:30.348) All the yada yada. Deb Krier (15:39.638) which is one of my biggest challenges, right? And I tell them the thing is, these are going to be things that you will hopefully do for the rest of the time you are on this earth. Wouldn't it be great to go on a two week vacation and not have your employees contact you in any way because they know what they're doing and you trust them? And they're like, and I'm like, okay, if you don't trust your employees, that's totally different. And the big thing is they also want to control the narrative, like we were saying. They don't want to talk about it, but people are not stupid. Your employees are going to go, well, you've come in late every day for several weeks and you look like hell. How much are you drinking? They're going to come up with things. And so you want to control that narrative by saying, I'm going through something medical. Lyndsay Soprano (16:27.166) of course, yeah. Deb Krier (16:37.109) We don't really need to go into details, but I'm going to be gone and I need your help. And they will all say, what do we need to do? And if they don't, then that's a different problem again, right? Yes, yes. And so shoo them out that door because there are other issues, right? But yeah, they need to be thinking. Lyndsay Soprano (16:51.276) Well then their name is Karen with a K. I'm sorry, Karen, that was mean. Not all of you are horrible. Lyndsay Soprano (17:01.356) Yeah, bye Felicia, yeah. Deb Krier (17:06.835) here's what's going on. And like I said, the employees are going to guess and you want them to have the right information because we fill in the blanks with the worst case scenario, right? You know, the, wait a minute. I think I saw them on that Coldplay video. You know, and, maybe that's what's going on, right? You know, and, so, yes, I know I'm like, for heaven's sakes. But, but yeah, you know, we, we make Lyndsay Soprano (17:23.468) Hahahaha! the HR department too. Come on, girl. Deb Krier (17:35.232) the absolute worst you know where we're gonna say hey why are you hiding you must be having an affair no you know who knows what was she might have been getting the Heimlich maneuver who knows right yeah I need a meme I have to create a meme I'm gonna have to do that I know I know my favorite is you know like how on LinkedIn you can add that says open to work yeah uh-huh yep yep Lyndsay Soprano (17:51.864) There's so many memes, these poo poor people, my god. Lyndsay Soprano (18:00.812) Yeah, yeah, yeah, no. Yeah, that's a good one though. Yeah. Deb Krier (18:04.887) But Lyndsay Soprano (18:26.488) And that's where you help guide them through the process of what they need to do and changes that they can make. quite frankly, it might end up making their business stronger and better and healthier for them as well. Deb Krier (18:27.787) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes, yeah, because they will have, yes, you know, they've empowered their employees, they trust them. You know, they figured out the where do we have communication errors and, you know, just all sorts of things. And they're going to look at, okay, what are my sleep cycles? What are my, you know, am I getting enough exercise? What the heck am I eating? You know, all of those things that, hopefully it does when they're done with this battle, they come out stronger. And, you know, we all talk about Surviving. No, we want to thrive. And so what are we going to do to make sure that we're thriving? Lyndsay Soprano (19:05.879) Yes. Lyndsay Soprano (19:13.142) I love that, because surviving is hanging on in my mind. lately, yeah, lately it's been a little bit like that. In fact, the past couple months, I thought it was just going to be May. June was also very challenging. July has been challenging as well. I started ketamine and that has not been helping. It's actually been making me worse, but I'm part of like, I need to stay the course of what they said. They said it's going to get worse before it gets better. It's like with chemo, like you've got to do this. You're going to feel like shit. You're going to puke. You're going to lose a bunch of weight. Deb Krier (19:15.947) Right. Yeah, and sometimes we're like that, right? Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Ugh. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes, we're going to about kill you in order for you to live. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Oh, and it came back gray. Ugh. Ugh. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Lyndsay Soprano (19:42.88) You're gonna lose all of your beautiful red hotlanta curl. It's gonna be gone, you know, and Well, you're a cute little redhead regardless of the fact. And you know, all that stuff comes at us so hard and we do, we look like shit, we feel like shit. Yes, thank you for noticing it. We know that. And that's really neat that you can help guide people specifically with cancer, not anything else, right? That's where, cause that's your wheelhouse, you know. Yeah. Sure, sure. Deb Krier (20:01.569) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great! Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. I mean, you know, the tactics and the thoughts are the same, right? As a business owner, we should have a business continuity plan. Yeah, I mean, all sorts of stuff. But yeah, I focus on cancer because that's me and I'm a business owner. Lyndsay Soprano (20:21.494) I mean, hello, yeah, these are some simple things, yeah. Yeah, yeah, and it would be hard for you to support perhaps like me, like you've never experienced what CRPS feels like, even though I still face the same challenges that you face in my organization, or I guess my was organization. But my team, my biggest thing for sure was delegation. But my team was pretty, they were, I was pretty happy with the things that they were continuously to do without me being around. like, well, I know you're not responding to this, but I'm just letting you know how things are going. Deb Krier (20:38.017) Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (20:48.705) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I'm making the decision. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (20:57.684) Yeah, I'm doing it with or without you. And I think that that empowerment is good for any kind of team, especially because you come from the marketing side. Yeah, they are. You've got a rowdy bunch of people. You've got creatives. You've got developers. You've got all these different types of brains. And then working with your clients who have all of these different types of teams as well. That's great. What a cool, what a cool thing to do and give back. Give pain purpose, right? That's what we're here for. We're giving you purpose right here. Deb Krier (21:02.305) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Wait. Deb Krier (21:14.173) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (21:18.679) Well, thank you. Yep, yes. Puh! Puh! Be gone. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (21:25.216) Everybody listening, we're giving you purpose no matter what kind of pain you're in. And I hope some of you are in pain because it makes us feel less small. No, I don't wish pain on anybody, but it is nice. It is nice when you do hear other people talk about pain or do, because it doesn't make you feel like you're on an island and it doesn't mean we want you to be in pain. It's just a good reminder that we're not all alone in this world with it. Deb Krier (21:32.243) I know. And you know, and I think that's the thing though is, Great. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. And there's nothing that we did wrong. It's just there. Lyndsay Soprano (21:55.478) Yeah. I don't know. I feel like sometimes that's a tough one for me, because I'm like somewhere along the road. Well, I've always laughed about how a past life. Yeah, we have talked about karma and the Karma Bus. Deb Krier (22:02.573) know, we were talking about karma before. like, really? And, and, know, and I, I had that, you know, there were a couple of times, you know, one of the times when I was really, really sick in the hospital, and I was having to go in for, I don't know, surgery number 10, 12, something. And, and, and there was a tear, there was a tear, which just about broke my husband's heart, right? And I looked at him and I said, What did I do to deserve this? Lyndsay Soprano (22:18.476) Whatever what it was. It's a lottery Deb Krier (22:31.883) You know, and then, you know, something kicked in and went, no, you dumb ass, you didn't. You know, and, but, and let's be honest. I mean, you know, we're also talking to people who have smoked, who have done some things that maybe weren't the wisest things in the world, but we did not want to make ourselves sick. You know, I mean, that's, that's the thing. and, you know, there, you know, there, there are things that would we have done different? Sure. Lyndsay Soprano (22:52.8) now. Deb Krier (23:01.447) I would have exercised more, I would eat better, but you know, okay, whatever. Lyndsay Soprano (23:08.824) Well, and even then, I don't care who you are. No matter how healthy you are, you get hit by something at some point in life. It doesn't matter how hard you ran your life. Sometimes I feel like the people that ran their lives hard, like myself, like we've got more immunities to like some of the crazy crap that happens out there. For me, mine is different, but it's one of those things I tell my sweetie. I always tell him, I feel like in one of my past lives, I must have like raped and pillaged an entire village of people and killed them. Deb Krier (23:24.173) I know. Deb Krier (23:37.665) Right? Somewhere karma is biting us. Lyndsay Soprano (23:40.044) somewhere, somewhere in the past life and this is me getting it now. And I believe in that wholeheartedly. In fact, I'm interviewing somebody after you that we're gonna talk a little bit about this. We've got some cool stuff coming up on the show. I know, it's very exciting. Okay, I don't wanna derail us right here. All right, so let's chitchat really quick about the seven courageous steps to take when facing cancer. Deb Krier (23:57.806) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (24:03.531) Nasty, should have warned me because I'm going to have to look. Lyndsay Soprano (24:05.932) You're gonna have to look, and I did warn you young lady. It is hot Lana over there. That's fine. You know what I'll do is I'll sing a little ditty right now while you look. No, because we've got a bunch of different things that we need to do when we face any kind of diagnosis in our lives, right? We get, you you've got to build your battle plan with your physicians. You've got to say no to a doctor that you don't like working with. You've got to say, I don't like your bedside manner. I don't want to work with you. Deb Krier (24:08.863) You did and then I promptly forgot. Yes, yes. yeah, let's sing, let's dance. Deb Krier (24:22.893) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Lyndsay Soprano (24:35.53) If you cannot handle the F word or you cannot handle me crying on cue, then you're not the right person for me. And I know that sounds stupid, but I need to be able to be myself when I'm speaking with anybody that's going to be helping me with my world, my life, my body, my survival, all of those things. Deb Krier (24:38.177) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. You know, and through this, I have definitely fired some of my doctors. The first one was my prim... Yeah. yeah. You know, the first one was my primary care doc. I was like, no, dude's a putz. And I mean, he couldn't handle it. He could not handle having to deal with a person who had breast cancer. Lyndsay Soprano (24:57.944) All my doctors have been fired. Deb Krier (25:13.771) He immediately referred me out and you know, and but more importantly, when I was so sick, I was in the hospital for seven weeks. His office was across the street. He would have been getting updates because he was my primary care doc. Do you think he shuffled his little hiney across the street to say, hey, how you doing? No, you know, and so yeah, I mean, it's like, what the heck dude? And so, you know, it just, really was, you know, I was not going to deal with him. And, you know, and I love my primary care doc now because she gets it. You know, she actually makes me come for annual physicals twice a year because she wants to keep tabs on me. And, you know, all of those various things. And so, and then my surgeon that saved my life, I fired him. He had the bedside manner of a nap. And it was just, no, I am not going to deal with him. And so yeah, it was just, I was not going to deal with him. And his senior partner in the practice is who I hired, who came in. I know, and it's so funny because when you say his name here at the hospital, people go, Right, because they love him. They love him dearly. He was who they put in charge during COVID. Lyndsay Soprano (26:25.944) Ah, what, way to go. Nice reach around there, Dub. Deb Krier (26:39.073) you know, and he had been chief of staff before, but, but yeah, I mean, you know, yeah, yeah. You know, and, but, you know, the, the, the guy that I originally had, he, was, he was just, you know, like I said, he, he, you know, I, well, like one of the things and I, we never knew what he said to me, but somehow I, because my mom was in the room. Lyndsay Soprano (26:43.458) talk about a contingency plan. Deb Krier (27:08.429) My husband was in the room and so like as we have no idea what this dude said to me, but I was convinced that if I went to sleep, I would die. I mean, that was just the way it was. so, you know, it was, it was very strange because they didn't know what he had said to me either. And so it was just this, this whole weird thing of, know, what the heck did this, this dude say to me? But then the senior partner, Dr. Odom, You know he He can't he did the weekend rounds and he comes in and he pulls up a chair And he said I'm here to answer any question you have and I will stay as long as you have questions Right and so I mean that was just that was one of those things and he did he was there probably over an hour and Lyndsay Soprano (27:53.528) Huh? Yeah. Deb Krier (28:06.387) when he finally, you we were finally ready to send him on his way, he said, is there anything else? I said, yeah, I want to switch to you because I knew we knew I was going to have to more surgeries. And he said, OK. And I said, do we need to tell that other doctor? He said, no, I will take care of it. And I thought, dear. Yes. And then it was so funny because when I had to go back into the hospital, when I had complications again, I'm in the ER and Lyndsay Soprano (28:23.192) Ooh, I feel like he must have liked a little bit of this. Deb Krier (28:36.007) there, you know, who appears, but the doctor who was the putz. And he just stops. And he looks, I say, it's okay, you can come in. But yeah, I mean, yeah, he was, I'm sure he was thinking, what do I do? And, know, and it was like, well, you know, yeah, you're, you're not going to touch me, you're not going to do any surgery. But he was, he was far more concerned with Lyndsay Soprano (28:49.086) Welcome. Deb Krier (29:05.089) he was gonna write a paper because I was miracle child. And I was at that point to the best of anybody's knowledge, I was the only person that ever survived that complication because I'm special. But it was the weirdest thing. then my first breast cancer surgeon, I fired also because she did things like, I found out that my cancer had spread by reading it in my online chart. Lyndsay Soprano (29:10.133) state. Lyndsay Soprano (29:19.618) We're all a little special here. Deb Krier (29:35.758) And she blamed the system. And I said, no, you say when that information gets released. But more importantly, I had surgery and I get home with drains. And anybody who has ever had a drain, it is the weirdest, wonkiest thing in the world. You have a tube and it's draining the ickies out of your body, right? Because they put stuff in you and then you develop fluids. mean, all this stuff. And it has this little thing that looks like a little grenade. Lyndsay Soprano (29:45.503) Unbelievable. Lyndsay Soprano (29:55.948) Yeah, gross. Deb Krier (30:04.439) I had this hanging off of my body with zero instructions. I'm like, how do I shower? What do I do? Was I supposed to drain it? Yes. Yes. And absolutely no instructions. And so what do I do? YouTube, right? And found out, because I was just going to disconnect it and YouTube's like, no, no, no, no, no. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. You know, and, and yeah. And so, you know, we figured all of that stuff out. Lyndsay Soprano (30:07.01) Yes. Lyndsay Soprano (30:13.656) What do I do here with these two tubes hanging off of my body with these bulbs underneath them? Lyndsay Soprano (30:27.202) No, no, no, no, no, no, no, don't do this, Deb. Come on, DK. Deb Krier (30:34.347) But, and so when I went back to get it removed, I told her, you know, I had no instructions. And she said, well, that's my staff's responsibility. And I said, no, it is your responsibility to make sure that your staff knows to do it. And she just, and that was the last time I saw her. I was like, no, You know, and I've had doctors who, God bless them, or. PAs or nurse practitioners or whatever their various titles are who I absolutely love, but who don't get my sense of humor. And if they're not going to get my sense of humor, yeah. mean, I'm like, I had this one nurse practitioner who, I you could tell she's, and I toned it back because it was the first time I'd ever met with her. And she just, she had literally no idea how to do it. And she tells me. Lyndsay Soprano (31:10.358) know absolutely nothing about that. Lyndsay Soprano (31:24.833) What is toning it? Deb Krier (31:28.717) I'm not sure what it is that you want me to do. And I said, I need you to order an ultrasound. And yeah, yeah, yes. And I was like, my God. But yeah, mean, she just, and I mean, like I also do these fun things where I don't always give them the right name. Now, I only do this when they know me, right? I'm never gonna freak anybody out. Lyndsay Soprano (31:34.64) Please don't put a pillow over my head. That's not what I'm saying here. Deb Krier (31:55.628) But they say, Lindsay, please tell us your name and date of birth. And I look at them and I say, I'm Anastasia Biefer-Hausen. Lyndsay Soprano (32:04.356) my God. Deb Krier (32:05.515) Yes, and we don't know where that came from. Somebody said that was on Will and Grace. But yes, yes, yeah. And in my, in the infusion room, because I, yes, yes, see, and which is, know, sometimes appropriate. But when, you know, when I go in, I go in for treatment every 21 days, I still go in and they get to jab needles in me. And so I of course told them, because I've been doing this for nine years, that my name is Anastasia Bieferhausen. Well, no. Lyndsay Soprano (32:08.12) It was on Will and Grace, so there you go. It's Karen! Lyndsay Soprano (32:22.762) always appropriate. Deb Krier (32:35.521) they've decided I'm Princess Anastasia Bieberhausen. And so one must do the wave, right? You know, you gotta have fun with it. Lyndsay Soprano (32:41.395) my God, Dub, you're killing me with this. You do. You do have to have fun. And I like I'm incredibly depraved. So is my sweetie. We just are like this. Our personalities together. People like, how do you guys not just like implode every second you're around each other? I'm like, I don't know. We just don't. But humor is a huge part of dealing with issues. It's been my it's been my go to for my whole life. But what I want I want to take away from what you were just saying about advocating for ourselves. If you do not like your doctors. Deb Krier (32:52.289) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (33:15.99) You do not like the nurse. You don't say something and get out of there and find somebody new. You are their client, okay? You are the person in charge. They are not. And that is something that took a long time for me to understand because we're like, well, they have a degree on their wall. I have many degrees on my walls and some of them should be MDs, quite frankly. Deb Krier (33:16.759) Get somebody different. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. It's the white coat syndrome. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (33:38.434) So I'm over the white coat syndrome. I'm over all of that. I want somebody that's gonna work with me, that's gonna be part of the team. I want them to go home and I want them to talk to their wife about me at dinner to come up with a solution for this poor girl's problem. Like this is the reason you got into medicine, right? I don't understand it now because right now I think a lot of our practitioners Deb Krier (33:45.325) Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right, yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (34:02.232) are dealing with so much more paperwork and their time is much more small that they can spend with us and all of them. I our healthcare system here in the United States is, this stupid country, is terrible right now. And it has been for some time, no matter what administration, it's always been bad. So yeah, I mean, it's gonna be bad under this one just because I hate them so much. And you know, I don't talk about politics on this show, but anyway. So I'm curious to see if you have been courageous enough to find those seven curators. Deb Krier (34:04.151) Mm-hmm, right. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, right. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Right, yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (34:28.781) Yeah, I didn't. found all sorts of different ones. So, um, I know. I know. Like, Lyndsay Soprano (34:31.83) You goofball, literally, we talked about your seven courageous steps. All right, number one, let's do them right now. Number one is be an advocate for yourself. Okay. Deb Krier (34:37.951) Yes, yes. Yes, you, as we said, you are in charge. And if for some reason you can't be, then you need somebody who is, your spouse, your friend, your whoever. Lyndsay Soprano (34:51.672) Number two is have a sense of humor, would you please? Deb Krier (34:55.027) Mm-hmm. Yep. Lyndsay Soprano (34:57.016) Okay, that's a good one. Number three is gonna be building your battle plan with your physician. I feel like that's courageous and let me tell you why. Because if you don't open your mouth and you don't tell your physician, I need a game plan. Like this is not I'm here for pills or I'm here for my medication or I'm here for this, that and the other. I am here for someone to actually give a crap about this conversation that we're having and want to do something to help me. That's what I want. Deb Krier (35:01.409) Right. Deb Krier (35:08.813) Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. And some of it might be, I'm not going to do any of this. Lyndsay Soprano (35:27.082) Right, please tell me now. Yeah. Number four, drink water. Deb Krier (35:28.651) Yeah. Yes, here's my giant cup in front of me, right? Lyndsay Soprano (35:35.574) Yeah, drink some water. Okay, number five is gonna be eat anti-inflammatory food, which is incredibly courageous to do, by the way, because a lot of anti-inflammatory food is stuff I never wanna put in my mouth. Like, I do not like Brussels sprouts. Stop trying to get me to eat these. No, there's not enough anything to put on a, I mean, you can douse it in Prosecco and I wouldn't eat it, and everybody knows how much I love my Prosecco. Deb Krier (35:42.327) Yeah. I know. Deb Krier (35:49.92) I know. no, I'm not gonna, I am not gonna eat a Brussels sprout. There is not enough cheese to make a Brussels sprout taste good. I know, no. Now if you doused me in Prosecco, maybe I'd eat the Brussels sprout, but okay. Yeah, yeah. Lyndsay Soprano (36:08.308) Okay, I'd have to set you on fire for you to eat the Brussels sprout. my God. Okay, listen and compassion and respect is part of anything in any patient interaction. And that means not just you, but also to the doctor, be respectful of them until they kind of do the things that they've, I love that I'm making up my own seven. We've got two more to go. Live with Deb Crerar. Deb Krier (36:14.839) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (36:25.805) Yes! Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Great! Yeah! Yes! Yeah! I mean, you know, these people, God bless them. You know, I tell people, our caregivers are our superheroes, right? And they're dealing with horrible, awful stuff. Lyndsay Soprano (36:43.404) They should be. Deb Krier (36:47.853) And you know, and I mean, like my, kidney specialist, she's so funny. She tells me, I have told them that you have to always have the last appointment of the day. I'm like, okay. And she's 10 minutes from here. So I, you know, I really don't care. And, and she said, because I always need you to make me laugh. Lyndsay Soprano (37:06.232) I love that. Yeah, because it's true. I mean, we come in and people are like, oh God, we've got Linz and Deb coming in. They're gonna do something crazy today. So number six is gonna be make somebody's day every day. Don't to make everybody's day every day, but we're gonna make somebody's day every single day. And I think that that's a win. Weird. Deb Krier (37:12.063) I know. Deb Krier (37:20.225) Right. Yes. Smile. Say thank you. You know, this stuff that we were taught in kindergarten. Right. I know. I'm the person in the infusion room going around going, I get you anything? Can I get you anything? Yeah. Yes. Lyndsay Soprano (37:31.904) Open up a door for the person that's being pushing an IV pole. I don't know. Simple things. Lyndsay Soprano (37:43.242) Right, that's exactly right. What can I do for you? What can I do for you? Instead of what can I do for me? And that is a flaw within my system. And I know that it is. I talk about it all the time on the show that I'm always the last on the list. And my sweetie got upset with me this morning that I wasn't like, but you just gave me 17 things to do by 9 a.m. So who do you think is the problem here? or you? And then seven, what are we making number seven be? Deb Krier (37:51.927) Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (37:56.055) video. Deb Krier (38:09.677) I know, I've lost track, we've just... Lyndsay Soprano (38:11.926) know where I'm at. know what I want it to be. I want you guys to be a little bit more empathetic. Because that is courageous as well to cry, to be an empath, to see love in others, to care for others. And I don't know how you could not push through pain without doing those seven things and not be feeling a little bit better at the end of your day. Deb Krier (38:16.575) Yes. Right. Especially now. Deb Krier (38:29.505) Right, right. Yeah, yeah. You know, and we see this on Facebook all the time. You never know what someone else is dealing with. That's so true. I mean, you know, and that comes back to the smile. Say thank you. Do all of that stuff. You know, but it also comes back to what I said earlier. Give yourself that grace. You know, we're not, now this, are we ready? Are we ready? We're not perfect. Lyndsay Soprano (38:51.384) Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (38:57.144) I don't know. Deb Krier (39:00.597) I know. I know, right? Who wants to be perfect? Lyndsay Soprano (39:00.994) Perfect is boring. Nobody wants, who wants to be perfect? I don't want to be perfect, I want my house to look perfect just because I want everything, labels facing out and on certain angles, but you know, that's a whole different thing. Deb Krier (39:11.179) Right, right. But yeah, it's okay to be having a bad day. It's better to be having a good day. But yeah, things happen. But remember, we really don't know what somebody else is going through. And your smile might have been the thing that stopped them from doing something horrible and awful. Lyndsay Soprano (39:18.114) it is. Lyndsay Soprano (39:33.752) Oh, I love that. That is wonderful. It is true. I I try to put on my smile and my sunshine wherever I go. I'm always like patting people on the back. Don't you look handsome, sir? You know, in the supermarket. And he's like, Yes, that is our number seven. Thank you for doing the list that you did not provide for us today. But you will not make this mistake ever again, young lady. But I think that it was fun to do it. Yes, smack around. I'll smack you back in a round. Deb Krier (39:39.821) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I know! You nothing I am, Deb Krier (40:00.674) bad. Yes, Lyndsay Soprano (40:03.54) my gosh. No, this has been really fun and really great. And it's wonderful to always talk to people that are thriving and not just surviving because they're it's hard to find strong willed women that make it through. At least I thought so until I started the show. There are more fucking amazing women. And this isn't just a women's show. mean, our demographics fairly skew women, but we're we're about a seventy five twenty five split. So men, we love you, too. Deb Krier (40:09.357) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (40:21.217) bet. Yes, you have wonderful guests. Deb Krier (40:28.363) Right. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yes. Lyndsay Soprano (40:33.016) And a lot of men are listening for their women, for their daughter, for their wife, for their sister, for their mother, whatever. And thank you for doing that because that shows that you care even in the slightest bit about what's going on. Not that you potentially don't, but possible. But this has been lovely, my sweet. Thank you so much for spending time with me today. We can find her all over the place. We can find her. She's got a Facebook group. She's on LinkedIn. Her website is tryingnottodie.live. Deb Krier (40:35.053) Wait. Yes. Deb Krier (40:59.117) Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Lyndsay Soprano (41:00.342) She also has a podcast that talks about this business stuff. So the business power hour with Deb Crear, which is great, super fun. And she's also, do you want to talk about wise women communications really quick before we hit the dusty trail? Deb Krier (41:04.215) Mm-hmm. Deb Krier (41:12.781) Oh sure. I mean, you know, it's it I started it over 20 years ago. It is a full service marketing firm and we just have a ton of fun with it. It pays the bills for me to do everything else, right? But yeah, if anybody's looking for me, I think there's three Deb Creers in the whole world. I am the only one with this wacky red hair, you know, and so and you know, over probably 1500 podcasts. So I'm going to come up pretty high if you Google Deb Creer. Lyndsay Soprano (41:24.427) Right. Lyndsay Soprano (41:32.77) That is true. Lyndsay Soprano (41:42.284) Well, that's because you're high as the kite every day in my life. I don't even know where that came from. I don't even know what it means. Well, before we hit the dusty trail here, is there anything that you'd like to leave our listeners with? Deb Krier (41:45.549) Yes! Deb Krier (41:54.818) You know, I want to go back to what we said before. You are in charge. And I don't care what it is, but you are in charge. You're in charge of your destiny. But you really are in charge of your own health. And make sure that you stay in charge. You you might get yourself educated, do whatever, but you're in charge. Not the white coat, not the spouse, not the boss, not the whoever. You are in charge. And if your decisions aren't what somebody else would do, too bad, so sad. That's their problem. Lyndsay Soprano (42:28.33) Amen, sister. I love it. Thanks again for spending time with us today. It has been lovely to see you again and to have this. thank you for the kisses. And to have this conversation with you. I hope that it touched some people that are here. It certainly touched me. Thank you for our seven courageous steps. That has been, that was actually the best on the fly. I mean, come on. We gotta do what we gotta do here. It's not like we're gonna stop it because somebody didn't do their homework, but you know. Deb Krier (42:47.117) was fun. Yes. I know, Lyndsay Soprano (42:58.966) All right, well, before we jam here, I have a new bite-sized extension of the pain game podcast called Pain Bites. So it's super simple. You go to Insta, you go to the bio, the link in the bio, and on there it says, submit your pain bite. You can hop in there and you can literally leave a voice note for me and we will put it on air. It is anonymous, so don't worry about it if you don't want your name mentioned or what have you. I talk a little bit about the bite before we play it and then I talk a little bit about it after. give you love, give you hope, maybe laugh at you a little bit, who knows? But I wanna know what's cracked you up in this week. What sticks you back together? I want your chaos. I want what unravels you. I want your aches. I want your pains. I want your joys. I want your excitement. I want all of it. So I am still standing up. How is this humanly possible kind of moments? I want them all. So like I said, go to at the pain game podcast on Insta, go to the link in the bio and it's easy, simple. It'll take you two seconds to do. But I would love it because if it's even for just a bite, it's worth being heard. So let me speak for you out loud, one raw honest bite at a time. You are exclusively invited to share this courageous and hot lanta VIP pain journey together. Let's get to the heart of how to kill with you by my side. Please follow the pain game podcast wherever you digest your podcast content. We will be there. Visit us at the pain game podcast dot com and follow us on all the socials. Thanks for listening, my little VIPs. Catch you on the other side.