Latest / Autoras de palabra con Rosa / La escritora Henar Álvarez: "Un hombre mayor tiene prestigio y una mujer mayor es una vieja, así piensa la sociedad"

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La escritora Henar Álvarez: "Un hombre mayor tiene prestigio y una mujer mayor es una vieja, así piensa la sociedad" · Autoras de palabra con Rosa

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  Take me with you tie me to the foot of your bed and feed me
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  on you. Let me pick up the hairs you leave in the shower,
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  your dirty dishes and the phlegms you cast out every morning. If you'
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  re not going to love me anymore, lend me your mother, I'
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  m worth whatever flesh is in your flesh. Ansia enar alvarez in word authors
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  with rose. Welcome, well found. Thank you very much. Jobah you
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  ' ve read it, I know you' ve written it myself, but
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  it strikes me. I mean, it' s art. Yeah, yeah,
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  yeah, yeah. It' s very strong what I' ve read
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  and you have to be very desperate to, as I say, beg,
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  even if it' s that kind of action, because it can' t
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  be sweet. No, I think a person gets to that point, that
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  I don' t think it' s that weird to actually get there when
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  there' s a lot of circumstances I don' t even think it'
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  s a matter of love or that love I think you' re depressed with
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  self- esteem on the floor, feeling that life either, you' re
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  like wanting to grab a burning nail. So that' s why you get
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  to think like that kind of thing, because you feel like you' re
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  so lonely that no one' s gonna want you that if that person doesn
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  ' t come back, there' s the only thing you could hold on
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  to. Your life is over and that' s why, all of a
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  sudden, they start out like all that kind of thinking, losing shape,
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  but they don' t break it. Losing the way for a reason yes,
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  yes, very important, very important, well is that many times they
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  tell you this not good, these things that tell us so much that you
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  get hysterical, or suddenly it is that he has yelled at me a lot
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  and this saying that is clearly addressed to women. The place the shapes.
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  You lose reason is like a man and lose shapes. But the reason honey
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  is now I still have, I mean you' re not gonna take it
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  away from me, that is, in which head that fits already I think
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  anxious. It' s Natalia, dominated by her impulses and doomed to misbehave.
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  If you look in the mirror, if you repair your wrinkles, you
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  just found out you' re old. If you look at yourself, if
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  you stop and discover this, you may have just been left for someone younger,
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  possibly just left for someone younger, or you' re possibly having problems
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  in any area of your life, that is, in morals, in family,
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  is that with your friendships. I think this thing that we have women
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  who have brought us down Maria Aire that we only have valeras and we are
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  young. I think that fear, that in the end, as we'
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  ve been put in so many ways, is in each of us, even
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  the safest. That' s it, and I think that when there'
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  s some pillar of your life that' s wobbly, then it comes out,
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  that and others, that is. But I think this is one of
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  those that we all have, because besides that I think we' ve all
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  lived what it' s like to be very young and that everyone listens to
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  you grow up and that case disappears or goes down. And I think so,
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  which has to do with society' s conception of an adult woman,
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  yes, which I think is like an older man has prestige and culture and
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  is a little bit of wisdom and an older woman is an old woman.
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  So this is what we' re going to do And it' s like,
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  of course, obviously, we' re there, like we' re
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  fighting hard so this doesn' t happen and so that this changes. And
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  then, as we see it and have lived it, we have it and
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  that' s what I tell you as soon as something fails that fear,
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  like so many others, because they emerge. And then he asks you if
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  I can' t manage my body, how am I going to manage the
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  battle that is life. It' s one of the questions he talks about
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  in the book. Yeah, that' s right. That' s right.
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  Yes, In fact, it happens I have also read to him once
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  that the obsessive disorders that have to do with eating are also related to that,
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  with which, suddenly, the person who suffers it needs to feel that
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  it has the absolute control that can dominate something or related to beauty, because
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  in the book is this topic, as you asked me before, the feeling
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  of control is very present. You make yourself feel safe, like when little
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  kids who just want to watch the same movie. All the time it'
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  s about a security issue, I don' t know who to face anything
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  new. That' s why they want to see Garfield every day of his
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  Atlantean life. You know for as long as it is, and then I
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  think it happens with us that all of a sudden, if you feel that
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  there' s something you can control and it' s your body, and
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  it almost always has to do with body stuff, it makes you get hold
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  of something. But of course, that generates more than disorder and shit.
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  You' ve talked about men. You say. Men are clumsy and selfish
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  and women are childish beings who did not know how to express their feelings or
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  explain what they liked in bed, because they have taken care to tell us
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  that no, that we do not like to fuck that it' s whores
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  they want and she is aware still worth. That' s a thought of
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  the protagonist. Of course, the novel is fiction. I mean, I
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  mean, there are a lot of things that aren' t my thoughts at
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  all, which are things that I' ve placed in each of the characters.
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  But well, in this case, the protagonist what she' s doing
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  is she' s read an article. She is also a writer and has
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  read an article by a writer she has always admired, who has written a
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  very cruel column about her book and besides, be like judging her because she
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  said like she appeared, like a lot of sex appeared in the book and
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  so on, and it seems like it' s a good thing that he
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  actually says it' s a thing to say that it' s very current,
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  because women only know how to talk about sex and I don' t
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  know what as if they haven' t been born of text in their works
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  or things like that. And then what you' re doing there is a
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  little bit like venting your anger from first having a feeling of joy, because
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  someone they look at has read their works, There are those who and have
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  written about it and suddenly, the disappointment of finding that it has made you
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  as an already manicured criticism of you know how all these other people who feel
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  threatened because fifty percent of the population now also have a voice. So that
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  ' s what makes it true. We have to say that nat Natalia has
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  a partner, has a son and just lost the relationship with her lover.
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  Yeah, that' s the character, that' s the starting point,
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  and the one that' s counting, the one that' s telling the
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  story and having situations, I' m going to say funny, but they
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  ' re also real. It' s a little parenthesis of something that you
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  tell me has done, also smile and it' s going to a parent
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  ' s ring. And the purpose of that quarter is to learn how to
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  clean your brats by yourself and tie your shoes. Yeah, real chapter,
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  yeah, man so real he must say one thing is real, because I
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  ' ve been told. That' s why I' m telling you this
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  whole hobby, because I haven' t gone to any peace gathering at all.
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  I' m not on the parents' whatsapp. These are things in
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  fact told me by my son' s father who tells me good for an
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  hour today they have had me telling me that they are going to teach them
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  to give the shoes and I and what you did you know then, to
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  look at the motive to hide and I to ok. But yes, yes,
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  real, real, Real, a girl who has just separated with a
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  small child, a relationship that they know from very young and that suddenly,
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  surprised that she wants to live, yes, open her area of friends,
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  having some kind of relationship surprises society is also surprised by that. Yes,
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  of course, of course society is surprised. In fact, Jode Anda that
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  we haven' t seen a lot of popular women who have been mothers and
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  who suddenly put on Instagram, because today I' m having dinner that such
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  and the avalanche of comments where your son is again with his father and such
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  a host is that you stay in check, eh of the number of people
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  that still have like those thoughts. Yes, yes, yes, of course,
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  if it is that I a little bit in the novel, in Natalia
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  ' s character, especially at the beginning that is when I contextualize who she
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  is, I have tried how to show also all the since she is young,
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  doing like some flashbacks, all the sequences of violence that she has lived
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  by being a woman and that pass completely that perceived as if it was a
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  thing that is completely normal, that no one gives her any kind of importance,
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  but that they are staying inside and that they are hurting you. Then
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  of course, she already responds to all these things. When it happens to
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  her that she was a lover, it leaves her like the drop that fills
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  the glass. And in reality, she is a well of frustration and rage
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  and anger and pain and things she has understood for a long time and that
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  I no longer want to understand. Naty' s father is the most shameless
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  person he' s ever met. Yeah, the father- daughter relationship,
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  so taking you the albar luegar park look says a lot. That comes out
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  in the first chapter of the book. And this first chapter was going up,
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  that is, we put it up for people to read before the novel
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  was for sale. You can' t imagine how many messages I got from
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  that sequence. I' ve lived it, but I' m talking about
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  many, many of my God when I read it, I thought you saw
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  me through a hole of shit. And it' s true that I really
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  like to read and watch movies and I' ve consumed a lot of culture
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  in this fucking sense is that always the figure of the bad mom guy,
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  that is, it' s there, like, in a lot of works
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  there are justified problems that people have, because either by an absent mother or
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  by an overprotective mother or by a cuckoo mother, that is, it'
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  s that this is the bread of every day, because in my life,
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  in my day to day, I don' t see that. Obviously,
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  there are mothers who are like this, but that the vast majority of people
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  around me who have problems have been because of problems with their parents. And
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  yet life, cultural life, does not convey that message of fact to you
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  the other way around. It' s like maybe the father disappears and comes
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  back at age eighteen, when the kid' s eighteen, he' s
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  raised, he shits and pisses and all of a sudden, the kid'
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  s super happy because his dad' s back and you say well, forgive
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  me this isn' t so. So, well, like many times I
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  ' ve talked to many friends, because I have many friends, missing friends,
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  friends who made their mothers pregnant and never knew and came back when they
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  were thirty years old, friends, tiresomes, inverts. Whenever I have it,
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  I' ve lived it around me. Well, well, well,
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  that scene goes in,' cause it' s something that I think is
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  very real. Also two hundred and fifteen books, a natural abortion, two
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  promotions and a wide experience dealing with Asshole. Yeah, another character. Yeah,
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  the editor is my favorite character in the book. Truth be told,
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  the only one who' s a good person. I also believe, you
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  say over- egos. He' d become a masterful hobby, that is,
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  he' s the Persian. Of course, if you can' t
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  work in an editorial, you know, if you don' t know how
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  to deal with people' s aps, you have a completely delusional thing.
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  I' m including myself is a man. Of course, you, imagine
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  how wrong it is to deal with people all the time It seems to me
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  that it is very tiring. Nat is a writer. Yes, it is
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  presented at the book fair Forgiveness, it is presented at Sant Jordin. Yeah,
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  he' s a resounding success. Yes, and then clumsy, selfish
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  men appear. Yeah, well, I know they' re actually scared men.
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  Yes, because it' s like the character we talked about before this
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  other writer, who are scared men, because suddenly they feel, then,
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  that they have to compete in bookstores with more women than women written. There
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  ' s always been. That' s it, it' s above all
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  very clear. Even you were remembering me and this I' m telling you
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  about many years ago, many years ago I remember that there was a cover
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  of a supplement in a newspaper already starting to get a little effervescent about the
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  fact that women had their eyes on them. Let' s just tell ourselves
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  a few things and bring it up was kind of like the great masters of
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  the lyrics and they find a lot of people and they weren' t moving
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  big and all the people who were on that cover. They were great names,
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  I' m not going to say, but there were great names,
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  they already wanted to sell what you did well to big ones. And then
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  I remember that there are people like moo and where she is, you know,
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  that it' s true that this was happening. And now I think
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  the fear does come from the media actually listening to women, that is,
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  even though women always sold, I think maybe they didn' t repair as
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  much, they didn' t give you as much hype and men by all
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  means you think they are, because they always had their space. So,
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  I think the fear of that comes now, of course, because now brilliant
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  women come and then there will be mediocre men who see that it' s
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  their space. They were occupying a space that didn' t belong to them
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  and then ah they' re going to leave and then I did want to
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  talk a little bit about it. In fact, this character is based on
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  a video that I saw a long time ago from a book fair where there
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  was a man I don' t even remember who he is and a companion
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  next door who had pulled out his book. Then this partner' s tail
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  was super long and his tail was nonexistent, and then there was a journalist
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  who was approaching and the guy wasn' t able to hide, that is,
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  the anger that was at the time the line that was flooding, so
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  surely it' s strong, because if it was another guy, I probably
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  wouldn' t have that pain you know, but because I was an aunt,
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  because this is what I also talk about in the book. Of course
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  losing to a man is part of the game, but losing to a woman
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  is a humiliation. In fact, that' s why so many times the
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  parents have told the boys that they don' t beat you that girl runs
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  more than that girl runs more than you see yourself as a humiliation. So,
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  of course, this is moving. Well, then this man couldn'
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  t stand it and when the journalist asked him how about at the fair,
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  because he alluded to the queue his roommate had and said something like that you
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  look at yourself no longer know if writing something good you' re going to
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  sell good. He made some very ugly comments, as he also, as
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  a fact, that his partner was a minor obrite and don' t miss
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  it that the journalist started to ask the people in line why he preferred her
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  book to his book, I mean, well, I just thought, that
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  ' s to see, but embarrassing you know and good people. The lord
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  you' re telling me because I love it, because I love it,
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  that is, what it' s about then was like clear wow, that
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  is, they' ve been told so much this thing since they were kids
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  that they don' t beat you this girl who now of course see it
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  as a terrible humiliation. They can' t stand it. So, this
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  was the kind of character I wanted to portray. Let me define it with
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  two phrases that are supposed to. There are people who have to want everything
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  to go well for them to fuck off as far as possible. Why did
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  you just say, why do you bother being ahead of them on the right?
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  It is a humiliation yes, it is very definite, yes, yes,
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  yes, of course these people, when they also feel humiliated and frustrated
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  the hell is that you look for turns. Dangerous, it' s very
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  dangerous, because the only thing you want you to sink, that is,
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  they all don' t care, because of course, as they feel humiliated,
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  then of course not really these people really sell a lot, that come
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  out on all the covers, that they' re going to fuck up and
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  leave us very quiet, yes, yes, yes, the morbidness of an
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  unpleasant physicist in front of a terrace. We don' t say much more,
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  but these profiles also exist. Man, of course they exist like they
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  won' t exist. That' s what' s forbidden, not that
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  it' s done, I think it doesn' t matter exactly. In
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  fact, it' s nice or unpleasant, all of a sudden like the
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  feeling that you can have power, yes, that' s kind of like
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  a meeting, because that' s through the window, in the distance or
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  looking at you with someone in a fucking bar. I think that has an
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  unbridled appeal. Let' s go back again what we talked about at first
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  that if you suddenly find yourself a little bit self- esteem on the floor
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  and any gesture that indicates that there' s a person who' s feeling
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  attracted to you, I think it becomes an irresistible claim. That' s
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  how I think hot revenge is Maybe the only thing left for the adults of
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  the child we were growing up to do is calibrate the consequences. But what
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  you just said if you get caught hot, you' re back to being
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  I love that boy or that girl yes and don' t calibrate, not
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  pounds. Then I do love the truth I do. Yeah, I just
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  think you have. It' s true that that only leads to disaster,
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  I mean, because that only leads you in the end to step on a
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  puddle and fang up to your neck. But it' s true that there
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  ' s a special taste in doing something, even if it' s bad,
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  that has to do with revenge the moment you feel like it. I
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  mean, I think the adrenaline you generate and the relaxation you have left those
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  first few seconds. I don' t think there' s any pleasant feeling.
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  Come on, not even an organism or similar to that then comes the
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  guilt, the elia or dealing with the consequences. But in the moment we
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  go. That' s priceless. Karma exists only that does not work,
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  as people would like. Yeah, it' s just that I feel,
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  I look, I live in the media like all the people in this room
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  and we know this is a nest of motherfuckers who do super well. Then
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  of course, they' re doing amazing. In fact, then when they
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  tell you this about karma, karma doesn' t look. Karmas is a
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  thing that tells powerful people to fight crumbs and leave them alone. He'
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  s practicing the puttish son quietly. You know how all these phrases of sharing,
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  living, all these things, it' s super- heavy. The
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  important thing is to participate clearly, in the meantime, I win, while
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  they tell us to important image participate so that if we lose we don'
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  t touch the balls, don' t look at this isn' t it
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  like that? This is not like that in any of the ways, so
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  I also wanted to, like writing in the book a little bit this not
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  karma. Karma is that if you' re a son of a bitch,
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  you' re doing great, that' s the real karma that you have,
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  the more power you have and the more you can accumulate, the more
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  you can manage and the better you do. But that' s a crushing
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  reality. Then when they come to you with things of these that are very
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  linked to religions and to maintain a social concord, for hear that it is
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  cool, but don' t sell me the bike. You know that for
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  nothing you say writing about a girl who wants to be free and doesn'
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  t get judged, treated, like everybody else, it' s the same
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  as being a whore and writing like a whore. Yeah, no. No.
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  If so, it is true, that you only want to be left
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  alone, but not in the end people continue to judge you based on parameters
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  and social archetypes. It' s just like that. We were clear a
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  moment ago what the carnal is. It' s clear to us. Yes,
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  fate, because you also speak you say when you no longer need help
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  from fate, you can alone better. We don' t need fate that
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  much. You can' t just stop and actually look at what I think
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  thinking all the time about the future is a brutal brake, in fact,
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  I do believe, but at the same time it' s clear that all
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  the time it' s like this duality that it would be so cool to
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  be able to live a little bit a day, to put it some way,
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  but fuck. In the end, we live in a capitalist society that,
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  since you don' t have things tied up and worry about the future,
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  you end up under a bridge, then it' s true that I
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  do mean if I wanted to put it on the lead, but that it
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  ' s true that this is a thing that I think a lot too and
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  more to me that I like to fuck with me that I know there'
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  s nothing that I' m going to be afraid to be with my friends
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  from fara or to travel or wherever, and to have to be as always,
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  dealing with him now or after. But I do believe that the future,
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  just as it is important to keep it in mind, I also think
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  that constantly thinking about the future is a brake, it is a constant brake
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  and that I also feel sorry that we all have to live it so tied
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  up, that is, I think it has been lost as emotional spontaneity.
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  You know or something, because you have to be, like, all the
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  time, calibrating the consequences. That' s why you read me before the
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  paragraph, that I remember that perfectly, because I really liked what I closed
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  saying were the barbaric decisions, that it' s like the decisions you make
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  when you' re a kid, like putting a cabbage plastic through your nose
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  that reaches your brain. And it' s like you' ve done that
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  good,' cause, yeah,' cause I was glad to stick in
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  a platter and what' s the nose. You know how it is,
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  and then I kind of feel sorry for it, but every time I see
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  it necessary. I don' t know how to get into that crave loop.
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  You say perfectly throughout the book that it means to you craving but you
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  would add something more to me, for notice Ansia. To me it is
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  a word that a priori might seem like something bad, but it seems to
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  me to be a good thing. Precisely because of what we' re talking
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  about is that I like to be anxious, because I think I' m
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  very passionate. The truth is that I like it because, moreover, I
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  feel that the day I lost the passion for things I would live life in
• 22:33
  a way because I do not know how more anodyne, as such, and
• 22:36
  the things that generate me craving, that generate me, desire that give me
• 22:38
  pleasure. I like it, it makes me feel alive, that' s
• 22:48
  true, that' s what I talk about in the book, that when
• 22:48
  that gets out of hand, because you start trampling puddles and a fangart.
• 22:55
  But a priori and for me it is not a word that, knowing how
• 22:59
  to control things has as a pejorative burden. Even if I do, I
• 23:06
  agree, it makes you feel alive. Thank you, Vivas. I feel
• 23:08
  the same way. How cool is a pleasure, because thank you very much,
• 23:12
  Rosa, thanks to you