Latest / What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie? / #200: Dude Bro Party Massacre III (2015)

Transcript

#200: Dude Bro Party Massacre III (2015) · What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie?

0:06
Hello. What's your least favorite scary
0:08
movie? What if it's my birthday?
0:12
You take me to a quiet little Bistro dinner, nothing too
0:15
fancy, and then you act like you forgot your keys.
0:18
Then the lights go out. Who turned out the lights?
0:20
Then the lights go back on. All my friends are there and you
0:22
know what it is? It's a God damn surprise
0:26
birthday party. Garson, bring out the fucking
0:29
Raspberry brown butter tort that reads Happy 23rd b-day Turbo.
0:34
Love your lying friend the sack of shit that he is.
0:37
Brent, Welcome to Watch Your Least Scary Movie, The podcast
0:43
where we talk about the good, the bad, the ugly, and the
0:46
absurd in all of our favorite. And least favorite.
0:49
Scary movies. Because we believe every horror
0:51
movie rightfully has its fan base.
0:53
Even if we don't always get it. My name is Travis.
0:56
My name is Jesse. And welcome to episode 200,
0:59
everybody. New milestone for the podcast.
1:02
And of course, that means that we're going to be celebrating.
1:07
It's the only way we know how. By talking about dude bro party
1:11
massacre three. Yeah, fuck yeah.
1:14
This has been long coming. I'm so excited.
1:17
About this Yeah, it it finally felt like the right time to do
1:20
this movie. We've been saving it for a
1:22
special occasion and this is the specialist of the occasion.
1:25
It sure is. Yeah.
1:26
So before we get into that, Jesse, do you have anything you
1:29
would like to announce? No.
1:33
OK. No announcements and
1:34
unfortunately we don't have polls.
1:36
Yes, there was a very unfortunate death in my family
1:43
and it just kind of messed up a lot of things last week and.
1:47
Yes, that's. About all I can say about it
1:49
right now. Yeah.
1:50
And I just, that's OK. It's hard.
1:52
Yeah. So I know it's like 2 weeks in a
1:55
row. We haven't done a poll, but
1:58
things come up, so we'll definitely have that for you
2:01
guys next week, I'm sure Dude, we're gonna have a good poll for
2:04
Dude Bro Party Massacre 3. Life.
2:06
Life happens, and this was a really unfortunate life event.
2:10
But this movie honestly has been a good distraction.
2:16
Yes. So that's chose to plug on ahead
2:20
with covering it this week because it's very silly and it's
2:23
something that my old man would have loved so.
2:27
All right. Well, OK, let's get on into the
2:31
movie then, since we don't have anything to.
2:33
Right, too. Why is your phone in front of
2:35
me? Whoa, that's a weird thing.
2:37
So can I keep going to grab it? That's not my phone.
2:39
Sorry about that. OK dude bro Party Massacre 3.
2:44
So this movie released June 13th, 2015 at the Los Angeles
2:49
Film Festival and then it had it's at wide release July 7th,
2:54
2015. OK, we watched this on Tubi.
2:57
This is not one of the movies that is compromised by removing
3:00
stuff. Yeah, yeah, that's it was all
3:02
there. We've seen this movie enough
3:04
times. Just a tip for people out there
3:05
that are looking for those just check the runtime on it compared
3:10
to what the movie is on like IMDb or Wikipedia or whatever
3:14
and that'll tell you if it's been cut.
3:17
But if you don't want to watch it on Tubi, as of March, you can
3:21
watch it on Voodoo or Freebie as well as Tubi.
3:25
And you can rent it on Apple, YouTube TV or Amazon.
3:29
All right, I'm about to list a shit ton of names here for
3:34
everything involved with this movie, OK?
3:38
We've got every dude and every bro.
3:40
Well, dude, bro. All right, so First off we have
3:44
the screenplay, which was done by Alec Owen, with story by Alec
3:49
Owen, Timothy Cianco or Ciancio, Brian Forenze, Ben Jiggly.
3:57
Giggly, Jiggly. I was going to pronounce it like
4:00
the very unfortunate Jlo Ben Affleck movie Jiggly.
4:05
Jiggly. Maybe it's Jiggly.
4:07
So Ben, Julie, Tom Jacobson, Mike James, Michael E, Peter,
4:11
Michael Rosaway, John Salmon and Joey Skoma.
4:14
So basically the five second film crew.
4:17
Uh huh. Directed by John Salmon, Michael
4:20
Rosaway, Tom Jacobson, Joey Skoma, Who Joey Skoma Did the
4:25
opening Kill, Montage and all of the Commercial Bits.
4:28
OK. Music by I Tyler Burton, who did
4:32
the score and then Spencer Owen did original songs for the
4:35
movie. So like the montage song that
4:38
they do. When they do exactly.
4:41
Special effects make up. Done by Kelsey Burke, Jill
4:44
Fogle, Joe Holland, Angie Johnson, and Ryan Keith Ward.
4:49
OK, cast. Oh, God.
4:51
OK, here we go. We got a lot more names.
4:53
OK Olivia Taylor Dudley plays Motherface.
4:56
Alec Owen plays both Brock and Brent Torino.
5:01
He plays both of. Them.
5:02
They are not actually twin bubbies, believe it.
5:04
Or. Not we don't have twin bubbies.
5:06
No, no twin bubbies. I'm sorry, my.
5:08
Investigation. I'm coming.
5:12
I'm coming. There's.
5:14
So many quotable lines in this movie, we're just going to be
5:16
throwing them out throughout the movie.
5:19
Greg Sestero, is that it or Sestero?
5:21
I thought it was sestero. OK, Greg Sestero as Derek, it's.
5:24
A very Damien Leone Leone thing. Yeah, and.
5:27
We've met both of them. That's true.
5:29
Yeah. We still don't know either.
5:31
Their names? Paul Pereiro as Turbo.
5:34
John Salmon as Nedry Head Cheese.
5:37
Ben Gigi. Gigi.
5:39
Gigi as Samzi, Joey Skoma as Todd, Jimmy Wong as Sizzler,
5:45
Kelsey Gunn as Samantha, Brian Forenzi as Sminkle, Maria Del
5:50
Corman as Buttaker and Patton Oswalt as chief.
5:54
I think I was just chief and not even the chief.
5:56
Yep, It's just Chief. It's just chief.
5:57
Just chief. And he is rocking the fakeness
6:00
looking fake mustache this side of Sleep Away camp.
6:04
Honestly, he nobody will make it to sleepaway camp levels, But if
6:09
anybody comes close to it, it's him.
6:11
He's the closest out there. Yeah.
6:13
All right, Jesse. Time for our game.
6:15
Budget or bug. Ted, I'm gonna.
6:19
Go bug Ted just based on the number of Crowdsource people
6:26
listed in the close credits. Yes, there are a lot.
6:30
And this is a crowdfunded movie, so budget.
6:33
There's a question mark here. There isn't like a certain
6:36
figure for what was pledged, so that much was 241,000.
6:40
Pledged. Yeah.
6:41
All right. That's pretty pretty for this.
6:44
So yeah, 20 or 241,000, but it could be as high as 400,000 and
6:51
I'll get into that here in a bit.
6:53
Don't have a box office, since I don't think this actually had a
6:56
theatrical run, and that means there's. $500 million is that
7:00
this movie deserves. Yeah, I wish it was that
7:03
successful IMDb score though 6 out of 10.
7:07
That's rude. Honestly, for a movie like this,
7:11
it is impressive. Yeah, OK, so I've got a theme
7:14
for three movies that released in 2015.
7:16
Man, what kind of a theme did you come up with this?
7:19
I came up with dumb, stupid, fun horror movies.
7:22
Oh, that's my favorite genre. It is, and the first one I have
7:26
here is one of your favorite movies.
7:28
Do you want to take a guess? This is 2015, right?
7:31
Yes. Do you want a hint?
7:34
Yes, we've discussed the potential cosplay for them for
7:37
Scare Fest. Is it Deathgasm?
7:43
It's Deathgasm, oh. I didn't know that was potential
7:46
I thought we were doing. It OK, we are doing it.
7:48
But yeah, that was one that we had discussed.
7:51
Yes, it is indeed Deathgasm. So Deathgasm released.
7:54
All cats, lower cases for pussies.
7:57
That was a terrible Kiwi. No, that was actually not bad.
8:01
It sounded a lot like them that released October 2nd 2015 with a
8:05
$200,000 budget. Also don't have the worldwide
8:09
gross on that and IMDb score of 6.3 out of 10.
8:13
OK, the only reason I knew the budget on that one is I was
8:16
almost kind of crowd, oh Crowdsource what Judge Bob did
8:19
say, but it was on there. They like had to get, they got
8:22
funding from the government for that.
8:24
One, Yeah, they won like a prize or something.
8:26
It was 200. 1000 Make it, Yeah. OK, second one, we haven't
8:30
watched it, but I think that this is Upper Alley.
8:32
We should watch it at some point.
8:34
It's the final girls. Oh yeah, that's been on my 2
8:37
watch list for a while. Yeah, same.
8:39
So that released October 9th 2015 with a $4.5 million budget.
8:45
Don't have the gross on that, but the IMDb score is 6.5.
8:49
This is fucking me up, realizing that these movies are all almost
8:52
10 years old. I know because in my head there
8:54
are recent releases. Yeah, it's kind of weird to
8:56
think about. I don't like that.
8:57
Oh boy. All right, and the 3rd and final
9:00
movie that came out in 2015? That's dumb, stupid fun.
9:05
Sharknado 30? Hell no.
9:09
Oh hell no. That released July 22nd with a
9:14
$2.4 million budget. I think they're honestly with
9:17
that franchise. I think their budget just keeps
9:19
going up. I don't understand that.
9:21
People want more Sharknado, Travis.
9:23
It's an Asylum film. It's me.
9:25
I'm the people. I do too.
9:27
I'm right there with you. But these movies don't look
9:30
anywhere near 2.4 million, and The thing is that they're not
9:33
supposed to. I don't understand how it gets
9:34
that kind of budget. I don't have the gross on that
9:37
'cause that was ATV movie for sci-fi.
9:38
Like Dolly Parton said, it takes a lot of money to look this
9:42
cheap. Oh, damn.
9:43
That's good. That's a good point right there.
9:45
You're right. IMDb score 4 out of 10.
9:49
That's fair. Come on.
9:50
Like, I mean that's what those. Movies are going for Yeah,
9:53
exactly. OK, so I've only got 1 tagline.
9:57
Only one. Only one tagline.
9:58
Oh man. Yeah, I was kind of surprised
10:00
myself. It's don't let a bro see it
10:03
alone. Kind of like.
10:05
That I like it too. Yeah, it's pretty fun.
10:08
Listen, one of the things I want to do most with this movie is
10:11
just like the over exaggerated head nodding.
10:15
But it doesn't really work well for podcast format.
10:19
So if you hear a few seconds of silence and either me or Travis
10:22
giggling, it's because one of us did the headline.
10:24
No idea. OK, so on to fun facts.
10:28
OK. All right, so this movie
10:31
actually began as one of their five second films.
10:34
So we didn't discuss it really. But this is the five second
10:37
films, people. They just went out and made 5
10:40
second films every single day. They would release a new one
10:43
every single day. An.
10:44
Intense amount of work. It really is, and this was one
10:47
of them. It became very popular amongst
10:51
its their fans and they actually wrote up a little synopsis for
10:56
the original trailer and I'm gonna read that 'cause I feel
10:59
like it just kind of gives extra context to all the weirdness
11:02
that goes on. I feel like we got all the
11:04
context, but OK. We do.
11:07
Among Sierra H Santiago's Western works, Dude, Bro.
11:10
Party Massacre 3 featured A whopping 35 exposed man breasts,
11:13
a nighttime exterior knife stabbing shot that was repeated
11:16
12 times even during all seven shower scenes, and was better
11:20
known in Italy as Zombie 8. It's pretty good.
11:27
I like it. So yeah, that became very
11:30
popular, which caused them to produce an actual fake trailer
11:34
for the movie, which they never had any plans on making this a
11:39
feature length film. But the fake trailer got even
11:42
more popular. So since that happened, they
11:45
decided to launch a Kickstarter campaign and they actually got
11:48
it rolling. So here's where the question
11:50
mark on the budget comes in. So they got pledged $241,000.
11:57
However, horror producers Keith and Jessica Calder, who have
12:01
produced films such as Your Next or The Guest OK, said that they
12:05
were going to match every donation.
12:07
Oh. So they have potentially up to
12:09
500. Thousand, Yeah.
12:10
They essentially doubled the budget with that right there.
12:13
See. OK, so this kind of ties in, I
12:15
feel like to the season six premiere of Joe Bob the Roger,
12:20
The tribute to Roger Corman, where Joe Bob was saying if I
12:23
had producer money, I would just like, you know, if I had them,
12:27
yeah, if I had $1,000,000, I'd produce 50 movies or whatever.
12:30
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's that's using your
12:33
power for good. It sure is, yeah.
12:36
And I want to read some of the stretch goals that they had for
12:39
this movie here because it kind of gives us insight on what
12:41
could have happened and why certain things did happen in the
12:44
movie. Oh my God.
12:46
All right. You want me to read them all or
12:47
just some of them? Just read some of them, just get
12:49
pick out your favourites highlights.
12:51
OK, so $230,000 got them a full body fire stunt.
12:58
OK, I don't remember when that happened.
13:02
It was at the beginning, right? It might have been during the
13:04
opening kill month. Yeah, 'cause they That was how
13:06
Motherface died the second time. That's right.
13:08
Yeah. So that's how we got that
13:10
$235,000, which is where the cut off is.
13:13
Here for where they met is why we get a huge fucking explosion.
13:17
So that is the reason why we have the Parched Town massacre
13:20
in this movie. That was so drowning, though.
13:24
Yeah, but it was cause of an explosion.
13:25
They blew up the thing, the sign, and it caused everything
13:29
to flood is no, they blew up the dam is what it was.
13:31
They blew up the dam, yeah, And it caused the whole.
13:33
Town to flood and created a new lake.
13:35
City, yes, which I had to struggle not to write New Donk
13:38
City and I noticed the whole time.
13:40
They could have had a like actual film tour with it
13:45
300,000, three $100,000 would have gotten them a multi City
13:49
College film tour and the top tear here $400,000.
13:54
We could have had five five second films Makes Dude Bro
13:59
Party Massacre Three the musical We could have had a.
14:02
Musical people. I know it could have happened,
14:06
but we we don't have a musical now and because it had so many
14:10
backers, it had over 4000. The The final 10 minutes of the
14:13
credits are all just backers. Yeah.
14:15
So when you see that intimidating runtime of almost
14:18
two hours, just know that 15 minutes of that is credits.
14:21
Yeah, all right, so to get this thing done, they brought in the
14:26
entire 5 second films team to write the scripts.
14:30
They came in with the goal to write AB movie.
14:31
That's chaotic and bizarre. So to do this they divided
14:35
scenes amongst the staff and told them they were not allowed
14:38
to communicate with each other. Once they got all the scenes
14:43
written, al go and took them all, compiled them and arranged
14:46
them to make the movie. That's why he's got the whole
14:49
storyboard. Credit for this right here.
14:51
And they it basically made him the showrunner is what they
14:53
said. Patton Oswalt signed on to this
14:57
because he had worked on previous 5 second films with
14:59
him, so they had that ongoing relationship.
15:02
However, Rex Estero, he was brought in because he knew
15:06
Rosaway through Rosaway's promotion of The Room, which is
15:10
weird. We almost we were so tempted
15:13
because this movie definitely gave us we want to watch some
15:16
Friday the 13th films, but it also tempted us to do a Greg
15:20
Sestero double feature. I'm wearing my shirt and oh, hi
15:24
Mark and the final. Thing.
15:27
By the way, March 1st he tweeted a picture of Johnny and he said
15:32
oh hi Mart. That's awesome.
15:34
I'm glad that he's, like, finally leaning into.
15:36
It, yeah. He leans into it.
15:38
OK, and the final thing that I have here, this film was
15:42
intentionally written to fail the Bechdel test.
15:45
They did this as a way to satirize the sexism that
15:48
dominated the genre, and they kind of set out with the goal to
15:51
make this a feminist film in a way.
15:53
Oh yeah, Like everything about this movie is very, like,
15:55
satirical. I didn't even question the fact
15:57
that there was one girl and they all hated her and that the
16:00
killer was a woman. And those are the only two women
16:02
you get besides the Dean who eats farts.
16:04
But he eats farts. So what are we gonna do about
16:06
that? That's true.
16:07
Yeah. All right.
16:09
And that's my fun facts. OK.
16:11
So yeah, this movie sounds like it was a lot of fun to make.
16:14
I love the approach that they took to this.
16:16
All right, so time for a good bag.
16:19
Ugly and absurd. Jesse, what did you like about
16:22
this? Everything.
16:25
It like, honestly, it's just so funny and we were talking about
16:28
this when we were watching it, that there's no way we're gonna
16:30
be able to to capture all of the funny moments when we talk about
16:35
this today. So just a heads up, like if if
16:37
we gloss over something, it's not because we didn't catch it
16:40
or we didn't think it's funny. It just this movie keeps coming
16:43
at you. You can tell that the five
16:45
Second Films team is very smart because you have to be very
16:49
smart to make such a stupid film and make it.
16:51
Well, yeah, definitely. Like, it takes talent.
16:54
It's not something you can just throw up there.
16:59
God. And like, the storyline is so
17:01
convoluted but simple and it's so dumb.
17:05
I love that it starts on Part 3, and that's intentional.
17:08
Yeah, I like that too. I love all of this.
17:11
Like we've got like those dumb moments like Turbo calling out,
17:17
like Brock saying he'll or Brent saying he'll never lie to him
17:20
again. That's the opening quote that
17:24
Jesse read, by the way, and it's the best moment.
17:26
Yeah, it's the best montage of the movie.
17:31
You know we've got Samzi, who has his like identical robot
17:35
upstairs and by the time you get there, you forget about it.
17:37
Or like the therapist is using all of their the dude bro's
17:41
fears against them and like they show they're like, oh, Zeke is
17:46
fairly conquered his fear of heights.
17:48
And in the flashback, did we establish he had a fear of
17:50
heights? Not as.
17:51
Fucking stupid anyway. Yeah, there's just like, there's
17:53
so many, like, funny moments throughout and it's just, God,
17:58
it's a delight all the way through.
18:00
Absolutely, yeah, I agree. This is probably one of the
18:04
funniest horror movies that I have seen in a long, long time.
18:08
It's one that I can watch no matter how many times and I'm
18:10
always busting out laughing the entire time.
18:14
I think that they actually make a genuinely entertaining slasher
18:19
movie too this year because these guys have a shit ton of
18:23
kills in this movie and they all look fantastic.
18:25
They all have, like actually really well done effects.
18:28
And it's all practical too. Yeah, God yeah.
18:33
It's just so smart and funny and I don't really know what else to
18:37
say about it other than that. Like, it's just such a fun
18:40
watch. Yeah.
18:43
Bad. I don't really have a bad for
18:45
this. The only thing bad I could say
18:48
is it's a nightmare for a movie that you want to talk about on a
18:51
podcast because it's so difficult to write everything
18:54
down because they are constantly the the problem is they throw a
18:57
lot of shit at you and like about 25% of it doesn't matter
19:02
at all. It's just like weird one off
19:04
jokes. So like you will write it down
19:06
because you're like is this might be essential to the plot.
19:08
It's not. It's not.
19:09
Yeah. It's just like a little off hand
19:11
joke. Yeah, so.
19:12
But sometimes some of those stupid things do come back
19:14
later, like the whole military thing where they like, yeah.
19:18
They they are actually like well.
19:21
They stabilize an entire country or something like that.
19:23
Yeah, they deposed general quartet.
19:26
Yeah, And then like that you don't you think that's going to
19:28
be like a one off thing, but then you get.
19:31
Well, that's not the big reveal at the end, though, where he
19:33
says it's President Reagan 'cause that's him just
19:35
imagining. That well, yeah.
19:37
No, no, that's something I'm talking about.
19:38
I'm talking about Ripstick. Ripstick, Yeah, Ripstick.
19:41
He comes back. It's like, yeah, I was part of,
19:42
like, the war. It's like it did change me.
19:44
And then like, it plays into. Yeah, it plays into his whole
19:48
character throughout the rest of the movie.
19:50
Yeah. So that's like the only bad
19:53
thing I could say about it. But no, I I agree.
19:55
I don't really think that there's much bad to this movie.
19:58
I mean, it's intentionally bad. You know, it's got the VHS like
20:01
tape quality, which I think that they did a good job with that.
20:04
Yeah. Yeah, and.
20:05
I wish maybe we had gotten a little bit more of the
20:07
commercial breaks. I get what they're doing.
20:09
They're trying to show the person is like stopping and
20:11
starting the recording, but there were like a bunch of like
20:14
weird moments in those commercial breaks too, that
20:16
were. Yeah, I was.
20:17
I was kind of thinking like I wanted some more of those too,
20:20
'cause it reminded me a lot of Cheddar Goblin.
20:24
OK, I was thinking like the Adult Swim.
20:27
Like the? Those are good to you.
20:29
Yeah, the, the. Programming, yeah.
20:32
Yeah, too many cooks. Yeah.
20:35
Oh God, those are dude. That would be like, a good thing
20:37
to cover on one of our Patreon episodes.
20:39
I have suggested on a footage of Bear, but you were terrified of
20:42
that. That movie is scary, guys.
20:44
I know it's like funny, but it's also scary.
20:46
It's so fucking scary the next time.
20:49
I put on some edge trader. Travis is like, can you please
20:51
turn this off? It's.
20:52
Seriously, it makes me nervous seeing that.
20:54
Yeah. So yeah, I mean, I guess talking
20:58
about bad. We actually just talked about
20:59
good stuff. OK, ugly.
21:02
I guess the stuff that they're like satirizing, you know,
21:05
'cause there's some, like, language usage in there that I'm
21:07
not like a fan of, And then like making fun of different, like
21:12
the Dude Bros making fun of different groups of people and
21:16
obviously them intentionally failing the Bechdel test because
21:19
of, you know, what they're covering.
21:21
So I'd guess, like, the stereotypes that they're rooting
21:24
this stuff in is probably the ugly.
21:26
OK, Smekel wants a bang bus for children.
21:31
No, he wants to bang their minds.
21:33
I know, I love the joke of it too, but like, at the same time.
21:36
Like keep coming up a lot and I'm.
21:39
No, I want to bang kids. Like, does this guy actually
21:41
want to bang kids it? Feels like, yeah, maybe that
21:43
joke would have been funnier than it went off instead of
21:45
like, doing it over. I do kind of like how he like he
21:47
she keeps trying to change. Everybody's like, no, no, it's
21:49
too complicated. Yeah, no, I just want to bang
21:51
kids, not banging their minds. It's too wordy.
21:55
It's too many words. It's not snappy enough.
21:57
Bookmobile. Boring.
21:59
Yeah, OK, yeah. Yeah.
22:03
And then absurd. All of it I like.
22:06
OK, OK, I guess I will pick my favorite absurd moment from it
22:13
then. How's?
22:14
That that sounds good. I've got mine.
22:15
You want me to? Go ahead.
22:16
Yeah, go ahead. I need to.
22:17
I need to sort through my favourites.
22:19
One of my favorite things about this movie and the most absurd
22:21
thing is the bag of oranges subplot that we get.
22:25
Oh yeah. I love it so much, and I love
22:28
that it actually pays off in the end because you think it's just
22:31
a stupid joke at first. But again, it's one of those
22:34
things you write down and you're like, OK, he thinks this and
22:36
then you think it's not going to matter.
22:38
But then at the end of the movie it all kind of comes full
22:40
circle. But it's so funny, actually have
22:44
a quote from one of the directors about Patton Oswalt's
22:47
reaction to that, he says. I will never forget the moment
22:51
Patton Oswalt put together. All the orange jokes littered
22:54
throughout his early speech. When he first read the script
22:57
out loud at a rehearsal, his face was that of disappointment
23:00
and joy at the same time. Patton Oswalt's fucking good in
23:05
this movie, too. Yeah, he's perfect.
23:07
He's yeah, he's the right person to play the chief.
23:09
Yeah. OK, I think I'm gonna say this
23:13
has become a personal favorite in our house.
23:15
And it's the beef box. And it's because we started it.
23:18
Talia has beef with a dog across the street and they're always
23:23
barking at each other and it just came from beef and beatbox.
23:27
And then we, you know, watch this movie, and we started
23:29
calling it Beef. Box.
23:30
It's an actual beef box. Yeah, Sizzler's got a beef to
23:34
get out-of-the-box. Yeah.
23:35
So you might have heard us occasionally in the show, like
23:39
referencing her beef boxing with the dog across the street, and
23:42
that's where that comes from. OK, yeah, it is.
23:45
Natalia has successfully beefed. She beefed out-of-the-box.
23:50
She beefs all the time. She's like Turbo.
23:52
She beefed before she even got in the box.
23:55
Turbo Turbo's my favorite character in this movie.
23:57
He's the best fucking thing he is.
24:00
OK, So what do you rate this? 10. 10 All right, I'm 10 with
24:04
you too. I fucking love this movie so
24:07
much. I like, no question for me this
24:09
is always like I'm, I don't think there's ever been a time
24:11
that you're like do you want to watch this?
24:13
I think the only time I might say no is like if it's too close
24:16
to bedtime. Yeah, it's just it's a good
24:18
movie, man. If you want to laugh, like it's
24:20
a guaranteed laugh. It's funny and it's like an
24:23
actual fun slasher to watch too. Like it actually goes hard.
24:26
Yeah, there's there's like an actual story to it.
24:29
Motherface is a pretty decent if I'm being for real, I like her.
24:32
Her. Costume design is so stupid, but
24:34
the face the face makeup is great.
24:37
Yeah, she's just got like, the flannel cut off.
24:39
Yeah. And then like big 80s hair,
24:41
Yeah. I like it.
24:43
I mean, she's got some solid kills and I like how she always
24:45
gives like one liner puns every time she kills.
24:48
I love that I will never be mad about a one liner pun.
24:51
That's why I like Batman and Robin so much.
24:53
Barney just gets all of the good lines.
24:56
She does a good job with it here.
24:58
All right, cool. So we got an average of 10.
25:00
Yeah, I'm glad that we have a perfect ten on our two hundreds.
25:03
Yes, it it feels correct, yeah. All right, so let's let's try
25:07
our best to get through this thing.
25:08
Hell yeah. OK, we start off.
25:12
I have to talk about one of the production logos because Scout
25:15
gets mad every time. It comes on, yeah.
25:17
Snoot, But she was laying on the couch.
25:21
She was not amused. I got all the opening logos have
25:24
like mouth made sound. Effects Yeah, we we get a
25:30
disclaimer that Reagan Reagan destroyed all copies of this
25:36
film. Its final broadcast was recorded
25:39
by a teen at 4:00 AM. In Minneapolis.
25:42
In Minneapolis. So that's where this footage is
25:44
coming from and that's why we have like the commercials broken
25:46
up in between, right? So we start off with Brock in
25:49
therapy. This is his third time this week
25:51
that he just is in there saying massacre.
25:54
So two previous were on frat. The two previous massacres were
26:00
on frat row. The first one started with a
26:02
panty raid gone wrong. No one taught the house mother
26:05
how to open doors already so stupid and so funny.
26:11
She sought revenge. But they ended up defeating her
26:13
with a chainsaw after Scooter's death.
26:16
Once again, Scout. Yeah, Scout was like, I'm I'm
26:19
getting away from you guys. She gets like a 1/2 right?
26:23
So, but it turns out the mother had a daughter.
26:27
The second was junior year and it was Motherface.
26:30
It was the daughter of the house mother and she was seeking
26:32
revenge for her mother. They ended up burning her alive,
26:34
which is where that $230,000 stretch gold.
26:38
Came from. Yeah.
26:38
OK, cool. And Brent Brock says he's glad
26:43
that his twin brother, Brent, isn't Greek.
26:45
And it turns out the therapist isn't a therapist.
26:49
Or actually, she is, but she's also a mother, faces daughter
26:53
and sister depending on which prequel you're talking about.
26:56
Whichever one. Yeah.
26:58
And then she kills Brock. Yep.
27:00
Yep, Just slices him across there with some scissors?
27:03
She asked. Would you say that all of this
27:05
has made you afraid of women? He goes.
27:06
Well, yeah, I guess I would say I'm afraid of women.
27:09
He also revealed that he's got like a psychological connection
27:11
with Brent. Yeah, I also.
27:13
There are times when he does like that little voice.
27:15
That it it bring so Zoolander to me.
27:19
Oh God, yeah, it does kind. Of suck.
27:20
Yeah, I can. Hear that?
27:22
OK, so now we get Brent skateboarding around campus.
27:25
This makes me think a lot about pieces at the beginning of that
27:28
movie. There's pieces and then there's
27:30
also like The Simpsons movie for me.
27:32
Oh yeah, but he's like skating around town.
27:36
And then we get a little bit of exposition because he jumps over
27:38
the dude from waiting. The guy that never speaks.
27:41
Yeah, and some other dude that they're just out there
27:43
sunbathing on the sidewalk. It's implied there a couple.
27:47
And he's like, damn it Brock, one of these days you're gonna
27:50
kill somebody with that skateboard of yours and then his
27:54
partner. I'm just gonna say partner cuz
27:56
it's heavily implied. It's like, no, that's his twin
27:59
brother Brent. He transferred to the school
28:01
after Brock's What Did I write down His mysterious freak
28:06
accident? I love this.
28:08
Like a little bit of exposition. Then they just do this.
28:10
Then they spend just like they 5 seconds with a slow nod and
28:14
rubbing sunscreen on their chest.
28:17
I. Love it so much.
28:19
So as he's skateboarding, he hits Nedri who and they like the
28:23
skateboard and the wheelchair like.
28:26
Flying his hair. Together.
28:28
And they he is like, well, I'm not here to pledge.
28:31
I'm here for revenge. And Nedra is like, well, maybe
28:34
you can pledge. And also, you know, this might
28:37
be a good way for you to confront your fears.
28:39
Kind of like how I have to. I'm a zoology major since wolves
28:43
killed my family and took away my ability to walk.
28:46
Yeah, yeah. They're all just out there
28:51
working out up front. Derek and he and Derek.
28:56
He invites him in and is introducing him to everybody.
28:59
So ZQ does all of the camera work and he films all of their
29:02
like this Where it goes, bro. Spike rages the hardest.
29:07
Sizzler is a pledge, but he won't get in 'cause he's a
29:09
vegetarian. Sam Z has a lot of good memories
29:14
with Brock, probably. PTSD, 'cause he sees Britt and
29:16
he starts to like. Yeah, his brain is always like
29:19
glitching and transferring Brock onto Brent.
29:24
He's got the Tyra Big syndrome where he's like twins, two
29:27
people looking the same. Can you believe?
29:32
So they go up to Brock. 'S oh wait, don't forget about
29:34
Todd, who they call Todd for short.
29:37
He's the smartest. He's pre Med and then Samantha.
29:41
She's psych major and she's Todd's girlfriend.
29:43
She's trying to steal his virginity, but he doesn't want
29:45
her to steal his virginity because he's not ready to be a
29:47
father. So at one point, Tarek starts
29:52
speaking French in the subtitles.
29:54
This is a very like Monty Python esque.
29:56
Yeah, where he's like, help. I'm trapped in the basement
29:59
being forced to do subtitles Turbo.
30:03
So Brent asked to see Brock's room and Turbo comes.
30:06
And he's like, all right, call Brock's room.
30:09
I got his room that's like an old kids room with like a little
30:12
baseball shit and like a tiny little bed.
30:14
He's got This is so stupid at first, but it makes sense later.
30:19
Kind of. It's ultimately not relevant,
30:21
but he's got a framed newspaper clipping of Brent winning Best
30:27
dancer at Props. Yeah.
30:31
So our turbo comes in and he's telling Brent that if he wants
30:36
to pledge, he needs to be ready for this.
30:38
Can you handle this? Can you handle this?
30:42
Can you handle this? And it's so funny because the
30:47
hardest Waps you can tell that they're not actually hitting the
30:50
accurate places, except for the little teeny tiny.
30:54
Yeah, you just give them a little tiny taps of them too.
30:58
Just can you handle this? So funny.
31:01
I love Turbo so much. But they also prank him by
31:04
putting a puppy in his closet. He's afraid of baby dogs.
31:07
Yeah, well, Derek tells before that Turbo that he's going to
31:11
help with the senior prank. Yeah, so that's what gets him a
31:14
little bit trust. And then, yeah, he opens up the
31:16
closet, has that whole thing. And then Brent, trying to win
31:19
Turbo's trust, decides to pretend like he hates dogs too.
31:23
So he goes over to the toy dog and, like, rips it apart.
31:25
He's like, I hate dogs. It's so funny.
31:28
He's like, huh? You're not so bad after all.
31:31
Brent or yeah, Brock. Brent.
31:33
Yeah, Brent. He is Brent.
31:34
Yeah. It's so confusing.
31:35
Yeah. So the prank they first they do
31:38
an Edward 40 hands with Brent Nurdry, who he's called from now
31:43
on, which is, I mean obviously that was going to happen.
31:46
I love this. This is so stupid.
31:48
So they they're prank 'cause they have to go to the school
31:51
radio station, interrupt the broadcast and let everybody know
31:55
that Dean Pepperstone eats farts.
31:58
Because it's important that everybody knows that except, oh,
32:01
the school radio station and the aircraft traffic Control Center
32:05
are on the same St. and they took one wrong turn.
32:09
Then they caused a crash. Yep, they end up killing 250
32:14
people in a plane crash and and Derek's like, well, it was worth
32:19
it because now everybody knows that Dean eat sparts.
32:23
Eat sparts. Yeah.
32:24
So obviously they're in a disciplinary meeting with her.
32:27
And she is like, you know, last year you guys broke the dam and
32:30
flooded old Parch Town, which created new Lake City and you
32:34
know, really boosted their economies selling Paddy boats
32:37
because nobody. Yeah, the paddle boat business
32:39
is booming. Yeah.
32:40
Yeah. The year before, Well, we don't
32:43
really talk about it, but we do get some very Apocalypse Now
32:49
sounds and their flashbacks. Yeah, she's like.
32:52
Explosions and shit. And they're like, but freshman
32:55
year we did depose the Central American dictator and she's
32:58
like, yes, I know you're heavy metal hot air balloon did draw
33:01
General Cortez from the embassy. So that's why I'm gonna go lean
33:05
in on you guys and just suspend you.
33:07
They had and they're mad because it's Greek week.
33:10
So that means they're not gonna be able to participate in Greek.
33:12
Easter for men? Mm hmm.
33:14
So they have to go. And.
33:16
But here's The funny thing. So she still gives them an
33:19
alternative to cool party and they're gonna go to the old
33:22
sorority house by the lake. Yeah.
33:25
So in the D they all leave. They're gonna have a deeper
33:30
party mother, and she tries to invite herself along also.
33:33
Oh yeah, that's how Brent convinced him.
33:36
He's like, it's all right guys, we can have a dude bro party.
33:39
And like, yeah, no girls allowed, 'cause she tries to.
33:43
No girls allowed. Mother faces in the Dean's
33:47
closet and she overheard all of this.
33:49
She also overhears Dean calling the Chief, who is like perfect.
33:54
Now all we need is the Virgo Sacrificium and the Dean gets
34:00
stabbed while he is just repeating that phrase over and
34:03
over again. He had to learn Latin for this,
34:05
damn it. So the chief calls in Butacre.
34:10
So he tells her that. Butacre prizes have never been
34:13
That's. What I thought I'd see, he tells
34:15
her. She's got to go down to the
34:16
sorority house and go get the dude Bros.
34:18
Yeah, she's got to take Officer Sminkle.
34:20
So that way Motherface can kill the Virgo sacrificium and have
34:24
the power to defeat the Delta buys on the Harvest Moon.
34:28
Yeah, and she's like, but how am I ever gonna convince that idiot
34:32
to go along with this? And he goes, Watch, he's an
34:35
idiot. Spinkle come in here, he.
34:37
Goes Spinkle. She goes, she goes.
34:41
Orange shortage can be saved. Dude Bros are in reality bags of
34:46
oranges, so they must bop them on the nose and turn them back
34:50
into bags of oranges. Also listen at all I know about
34:55
Chico State being a party school comes from that episode of King
34:58
of the Hill where Bobby and Connie are wrestling and kind of
35:01
goes I want to go to a party school Chico State.
35:05
I love how Patton Oswald's delivering this though.
35:08
He's like saying it like he knows how stupid is.
35:11
He's like you have to bop them on the nose to turn them back on
35:14
their backs of. Orange.
35:15
I got to imagine that's why. Like when he got the revealed,
35:18
Yeah. And he was like, God damn it.
35:21
Yeah, so Sminkle takes it very seriously and he's on the case.
35:27
OK, the Dude Bros took Samantha's motorhome and it's
35:31
like, set up for the three month anniversary weekend.
35:34
And they're. Like like baby stuff in it.
35:36
Yeah, and he's like, Todd's like, guys, Samantha just wants
35:41
us to be happy. Yeah, so we told man Patty, he's
35:47
crying at the graves of his family and when the Delta Pies
35:50
pull up, he's like, you flooded the town and killed my whole
35:55
family and saved the Patty boat business.
35:58
I'm gonna get a picture with. You guys here?
36:01
Poses my dad family, now a goofy one and they're all like.
36:06
Super uncomfortable. And he's like I said, goofy.
36:10
So they all are like doing things like humping the grave.
36:12
Humping the gravestone. That's my son.
36:14
He was two months. Yeah, I love Prince Reaction.
36:19
He's like he he feels like disgust.
36:21
It's like it's. So it's so wrong.
36:25
Yeah, it's great. So they all get into the paddle
36:27
boats. Only one problem.
36:29
Nedri can't get in a boat because he's handicapped.
36:32
So they tell him to fuck off and wheel over.
36:34
There's a handicap paddle like. 20 miles that way, Yeah, so.
36:38
He's got to wheel through the woods by himself.
36:40
It's OK, old Iron Arm said. Cheese Got this, so St.
36:45
Climbettaker are driving. He's doing his top ten list.
36:50
Yeah, Letterman. Oh my God, it's unending.
36:53
This is not a one time bit and I'm exhausted by this guy by the
36:57
end of the movie. I love this guy.
36:59
He reminds me a lot of the guy. He's the guy that Dwight hires
37:04
from the office to do like stuff whenever he buys the building.
37:11
Oh, Nate. Nate.
37:13
Yeah, and he reminds me of Nate. Gum has gotten mint here.
37:16
Yeah, I love Nate. I do too.
37:19
I like this guy a lot too. OK, so they're driving.
37:23
They see a man beating a small child.
37:26
No, he's just shaking this kid on the side of the road and this
37:28
kids got a suit and tie and he's like, you think you're better
37:31
than me? They 'cause you got a cool suit
37:33
and a job. And so they pull over and
37:38
sminkles, like, run away. Can't get as far as ways you
37:41
can. Here's The Grapes of Wrath and
37:43
you better read that fucking book.
37:45
Here's $100 and Grapes of Wrath run into the woods and promise
37:48
me you'll read that fucking book.
37:50
Yeah. And so then when they get back
37:51
in the van, that's when Candace Buttaker is telling him she was
37:58
like, wow, that was really impressive.
37:59
And it's really great that you you seem so passionate about
38:02
taking care of people and about kids.
38:03
And he goes, well, one time I read a book and it's like my
38:07
mind just went bang. So now that's what I want to do.
38:10
I want to bang kids minds and I I want like a mobile library
38:15
where I can go around and and bang.
38:18
God, this feels so. Dirty and I'll call it a bang
38:20
bus. Sminkles bang bus.
38:24
And she's like, maybe bookmobile goes, well that's boring.
38:26
Who wants to get banged on bookmobile?
38:28
Oh my God, this is so bad. No.
38:32
I'm definitely getting it a bang bus.
38:36
So the they while they've been talking about this though, they
38:40
ran over the child beater. Yeah, and he has wrapped
38:45
completely around the axles. So the van breaks down and I so
38:51
they get to the The Dude Bros, meanwhile get to the house and
38:54
ripsticks there. They thought he died in the war,
39:00
and a piece of him did. A piece of him did that day, and
39:03
then you hear like the sound effects again of like the war.
39:06
So now we get the cleaning montage because it's on the work
39:08
hard side of the tape. Yeah.
39:10
So they're cleaning. But some of them like turbos on,
39:13
like one of those, it's a stationary bike, but it's got
39:16
like the the the pool bars. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
39:21
So they've got all of that. And then when they're done,
39:23
they're like, man, this place looks so much better.
39:25
So they flip the tape over to party hard.
39:27
Yeah. So they start partying and it's
39:29
like 5 seconds and then the powers cut.
39:31
Yeah, and they they're like Derek, your dad's a handyman.
39:37
And also there's this thing with Samsi and it's like a running
39:40
bit and it's so small and it cracks me up because, like when
39:42
Nadri needed to get to a handicap accessible entry point,
39:46
he goes, if I remember correctly, and I do.
39:50
So this is one of those. He goes, if I remember
39:52
correctly, and I do, the fuse box is in the shed and they're
39:55
like, Derek, your dad's a handyman, why don't you go take
39:57
care of the fuse box? And he goes, I hate handyman
40:00
work, you know that. And Turpal's like, why would I
40:02
tell you to go do handyman work if I knew that, bro, I wouldn't.
40:05
See if I knew that, bro. I love how he says so.
40:09
So Derek goes out to the shed, who's like, you've been over
40:11
this in therapy, you could do this.
40:13
And like, all the tools are freaking about there's like a
40:16
chainsaw and there's a hammer and an axe.
40:20
So he conveniently tears his shirt into like a what kind of
40:24
shirt is like a crop top? Yeah, it gets like snagged on
40:27
the door. So he gets like a nice 80s like
40:29
crop top. Yeah, sweatshirt.
40:32
He finds the fuse box and he actually manages to get it
40:34
fixed, but as soon as he does, Motherface comes up behind him
40:37
with a hoe and pushes him into the fuse box, killing him.
40:40
Very Jason Voorhees of him, yeah.
40:43
So Brent flashes back to prom and Brock Pep talking him on how
40:48
to dance, and he says dancing is basically just like Tai chi
40:51
fighting. I like how he's.
40:52
Dancing with the mannequin. He's like, yeah, so you just got
40:56
to go out there and just have fun.
40:58
And tomorrow we'll go to Macy's and return that mannequin.
41:03
Because what am I ever going to do without you at school, Brock?
41:06
Because I'm always right here, right with you.
41:08
And then touches his little mole.
41:11
So. But he gets snapped out of this
41:14
because Spike, Spike is screaming murder.
41:18
And they're like, what? What happened?
41:21
He gets the beer, Somebody murdered the beer and the keg is
41:24
all tapped out and all of the beers have been shotguns.
41:28
And so Zekew and Sizzler decide that they're gonna go on a B EE
41:31
double RUN beer run, and. But first, Sizzler must go in
41:36
the beef box. The beef box.
41:38
It's a box with a gory hole on it.
41:40
He's got a beef out of it. He's got a beef before he's let
41:43
out of it. Yeah.
41:44
It's not clear how many times you have to beef, because ZQ
41:46
does tell, like various amounts of beefing that have happened in
41:50
there. I like.
41:51
He's like Turbo. He was just beefing before the.
41:53
Box even happened, Yeah, yeah. But it took ZQ until day five to
41:56
beef. Yeah, yeah.
42:00
Sminkle and Buttaker, meanwhile, are stranded.
42:02
They can't change the tire because it's now dark and the
42:05
wolves are out there. And we know that these wolves in
42:07
Chico are vicious. Yeah, they will kill families
42:10
and paralyzed teenagers. Let's see.
42:15
Brent finds a secret door. Yeah, he has like a a vision of
42:20
Brock in the mirror and he like, shows him where to press on the.
42:23
Door Did Did this scene at all make you think of Troll 2 a
42:28
little bit where he's talking to Grandpa in the mirror?
42:30
I can see that, yeah, I can definitely see that.
42:34
So yeah, he goes upstairs and he starts to find clues, like a
42:38
bunch of newspaper clippings of all of, like, the past murders
42:41
that have happened. And then he also finds Samzi up
42:44
there, sitting in the chair. And Samzi thinks Brent is Brock,
42:48
even more so than he did before. And he says, well, what do you
42:53
think about your brother Brent? And he goes, he's a loser And he
42:57
goes, that's strange, Brock said that he missed Brent all the
42:59
time. Dance with me and he goes, but
43:02
my investigation, but they dance.
43:06
They have a nice little moment. And then Sam, he says catch me
43:09
and he does catch him, but then he also drops him and his neck
43:11
breaks and he is like trying to cover him up with the blanket.
43:15
And Spike pops up and he goes, I see what's going on.
43:19
You drink all the beer. Yeah, so he gets all frustrated,
43:23
runs out of the house, manages to find a keg out in the wild.
43:27
Mm hmm. It's just like.
43:28
Floating in the water, which unrealistic but OK and he's like
43:34
but there's no tap. And then that mother face stabs
43:37
him in the head with the tap. Yeah, taps.
43:39
His. And then, yeah, taps his head
43:41
and fills a cup with it and she goes, hmm, all head.
43:47
That's great. That's pretty good.
43:49
So meanwhile, back at the house, they're having the Delta Bi
43:53
Biannual Bicep Gauntlet. I love it.
43:55
That's I no no notes. That is the perfect name for an
43:58
arm wrestling contest. Yeah, Samantha shows up and all
44:02
the guys, all the Bros get mad at Todd because he's breaking
44:06
the rules. No girls allowed.
44:08
Yeah. So they forced Todd to go out
44:10
and they're like, yeah, I believe there's a tin to shed.
44:13
So here's the thing. While they're doing this is
44:16
happening. When Turbo and Brent are arm
44:18
wrestling goes when you lose, I'm gonna read your diary and
44:22
you're gonna go sit over there. And Brent doesn't want him to
44:27
know about the investigation, obviously, because he had to lie
44:29
his way into the house. So he's trying to make sure he
44:32
wins. So once Amanda pops up and they
44:34
all vote for her to leave, Brent's like ready to go to fit.
44:37
And he goes, yeah, no girls. And then they say that Todd Todd
44:41
has to go with her because. He's responsible.
44:44
Yeah, he's responsible, Yeah. And if I remember correctly, and
44:48
I do, there's a tent in the shed.
44:49
Yeah. Go get the go to the shed and
44:51
get the tent. Yeah, get the tent from the
44:52
shed. I.
44:53
Think that there's a tent in the shed.
44:55
Yeah, they all say it. Yeah.
44:58
And like whenever Todd goes out and he's so mad at Samantha,
45:02
he's like, you ruined my life. He's like ripping his shirt and
45:05
it takes like 5 seconds for him to do.
45:08
But they get the tent, they get set up in there.
45:11
And somehow she convinced the Red way to have sex.
45:13
And he was like, I don't know, these air holes he poked in, the
45:15
condom art working. I don't think little Todd can
45:17
breathe. And she's like, just keep going
45:19
and he's like, I don't know, she goes.
45:23
Yeah, she becomes possessed or something.
45:25
And then, as it's happening, Mother Face comes up from behind
45:28
steps Todd through the chest or something, which causes him to
45:32
die an orgasm at the same time. Yup, So Samantha just goes back
45:37
to sleep in the tent. Yeah, she passes out right away.
45:40
I like that because that's kind of A twist on the trope of the
45:42
man, like falling asleep as soon as he nuts.
45:45
Like, yeah, she's like, thanks babe.
45:47
And then she starts snoring out in the woods.
45:51
A tree has fallen on ZQ and he's like, kick my camera in my
45:54
general direction. Yeah, the ankle, the shot here
45:58
is perfect. And scissor is like, well, if I
46:02
can get out-of-the-box, he goes, no, you have to beef to get
46:04
out-of-the-box. He's like, oh, perfect rope
46:08
because a rope is draped around him and it's actually Mother
46:11
face and she splits him in half. Oh yeah, that's a good kill.
46:14
Yeah, and Sizzler beefs rips the box in half.
46:17
I like how he's like, I'm beefing, I'm beefing now I'm
46:18
beefing and he just runs out-of-the-box.
46:21
He grabs the camera and makes it away.
46:23
Yeah, Smekel is having a nightmare and he wakes up.
46:29
They are trying to get the van going.
46:32
Buttaker needs him to push it and he can't push it.
46:36
So she's like trying to encourage him by doing a top ten
46:39
list of why Smekel is great. So they do get it going, except
46:45
then they immediately crash because Sizzler runs onto the
46:48
road, and then they just. Fly.
46:50
Yeah, they team Rocket. Yeah, it's like way over the top
46:53
and it's amazing. Like we see them fly over
46:55
various scenery. There's like a waterfall, the
46:57
moon, trees, and they eventually land in a lake.
47:02
OK, so it's now like the next day the Bros are out swimming.
47:06
Yeah, they see ZQ coming down on zip line, except it's just the
47:11
top half of ZQ, so. I like this shot though of him.
47:16
He hits the lake and he's so lonely, sinks down to parched
47:20
him and. Then he like falls through the
47:22
whole the roof of one of the houses that has been covered by
47:27
the the drought, the flooding. And it knocks all of the other
47:31
bodies out. So they freak out.
47:33
They run out of the lake. That shot is so well done.
47:36
That's like one of those visual gags that kills me every time.
47:40
Meanwhile, Samantha has woken up and realized that TOW Dee was
47:44
murdered and she's covered in his blood, so she goes running.
47:47
The groups meet each other and they immediately suspect
47:50
Samantha because she's covered in blood.
47:52
Yep, Walker. Yeah, and Samzi is on the
47:56
baseball team, so they're like, all right, he's a pitcher, but
48:01
and they give him the bat in. Yeah, pitchers can't normally
48:03
hit just. Well, that's that's why it's
48:06
confusing at first, but the payoff is great.
48:08
So he's sitting there, he's ready to go, and they're like,
48:10
all right, we're gonna lure her in.
48:12
And Bren at first is like trying to protest.
48:13
And then he realizes that he still needs to be on their side,
48:16
right? So they let Samantha in, and you
48:19
think Sam's gonna whack her with the bat, but he just.
48:22
Throws it, yeah. And it knocks her out, yeah.
48:27
And then that's when Bren's like, look guys, I don't think.
48:30
Samantha can't be Motherface because she was on a cruise when
48:33
Motherface was killed last year. Yeah, so.
48:36
But they don't believe him. And Brent reveals his real
48:41
motive for being there. He's like, I've been doing all
48:43
of this research, 'cause I'm trying to, I'm trying to, you
48:47
know, solve the mystery of my brother's murder.
48:50
Sizzler appears with the video and they plug it into the TV.
48:54
And this is the best version of the Enhanced.
48:56
Yeah, enhanced. I said enhanced.
49:00
Damn it. No squeeze.
49:01
Your eyes. Yeah, And then like, Oh my God,
49:05
it's motherface. So Samzi's like I've grown weary
49:10
of dealing with Brock's plans to defeat Motherface, and those
49:14
plans never working out. So I've been working on an
49:16
identical replica of myself in robot form that is trained and
49:20
programmed to kill Motherface, and it's up in the attic and
49:23
Bran's. Like, I love Sam's.
49:26
He runs upstairs to go get him. He can hear the whole
49:28
conversation. He's like, Oh my God, what
49:30
happened? Did you try to dance again?
49:33
I love that that's a problem of his robot ass.
49:35
Yeah, so yeah, he, like, storms back downstairs and starts
49:40
freaking out. Yeah, he runs out and mother
49:43
faces. He freaks out because when he
49:45
gets downstairs, he sees Mother Face outside.
49:47
So he runs out and he gets to the edge of the dock and Mother
49:50
Face plugs like a little receptor thing into his skull
49:53
and uses the remote control to kill him.
49:56
Yeah, Mother Face is the sister slash daughter of the prior
50:01
mother faces. So last year's mother face was
50:05
the daughter of the original mother Face.
50:06
She is the identical twin sister of that sister, yes.
50:09
Very confusing. It's not that confusing, it just
50:12
as convoluted saying it out loud.
50:14
Yeah, OK. Sminkle tries to see PR but a
50:16
girl because she got some water in her in the.
50:19
Like raspberries, her mouth, and yeah.
50:24
It's scary 'cause it's like poo poo poo.
50:28
Yeah, I love this, but he actually manages to resuscitate
50:33
with. His virgin tears.
50:34
Yes, virgin tears. They just drop on it.
50:39
It's like an attack and an enemy attack.
50:41
And when she wakes up, he confesses that he loves her and
50:44
she's like, oh smooth glow. I'm so sorry because mother
50:47
faces right behind him and knocks him out.
50:49
Yeah. Turbo is mad that Brent lied.
50:53
And that's when we get. And Brent is like, I promise I
50:55
will never lie to you again. And that's why when Brent's
50:58
like, what about if you throw me a surprise birthday party?
51:01
It's a God damn surprise birthday party.
51:06
I love it so much. That's a that's a legendary
51:08
speech. It's amazing.
51:11
And then he starts crying and he's like, no, I will ruin every
51:15
surprise party you ever have. And the door goes, I have a
51:18
heavy Dick. That's why I hate puppies,
51:22
because their heavy Dicks remind me of my heavy Dick.
51:25
I've got a heavy baby. It's so weird.
51:31
It's. So stupid.
51:34
But yeah, they kind of reconcile after that because he confessed
51:37
his deep, dark secret. Yes, everything's OK now, I
51:42
guess. Scissor goes upstairs to eat
51:44
some of his veggies, but he finds they've been eaten by a
51:46
cute little Bunny. Except then Motherface is also
51:51
there, and she reaches in, pulls out some of his organs and is
51:54
trying to feed him his own organs.
51:56
And then she takes his intestines and flushes it down
51:58
the toilet so they all just keep ripping out of it.
52:01
My God, that's so cool. I love it.
52:04
Now Turbo walks into a room, finds a gun with one bullet, and
52:08
then like, one of those little the novelty puppy dogs that,
52:11
like, does the flips. Yeah, it comes in and he's like,
52:14
what are you doing? And then a bunch of, like,
52:16
actual puppies come in and he's in a room with a bunch of
52:21
puppies and a gun with one bullet.
52:23
So he shoots, But we hear off screen.
52:26
We hear the gun go off. And Samantha turns to Brent and
52:29
says, what was that sound? And Frank goes, Turbo's dead.
52:34
And she goes, what about Sizzler?
52:36
And he's like it is honestly. Forgot his voiceover, he goes.
52:39
I forgot about Sizzler. Wasn't sure he was.
52:41
But out loud, he says. Let's split up and look for.
52:44
It so like he starts from wandering back through like past
52:47
scenes and flashbacks and stuff. They find Sizzler dead and
52:52
Brent's like, it's just you and me, we're the last two survivors
52:55
and he goes and she says 3. Yeah.
52:59
She reveals she's pregnant with a little Todd.
53:01
Yeah. Todd.
53:02
Except then she gets killed. And what is the fucking movie
53:07
with the baby fetus death That everybody?
53:10
Anthropophagus, Yeah, Where he, like, rips it out and eats it.
53:13
Yeah, kind of that. Yeah, just like rips through and
53:18
like tears the fuse out. Yeah, that baby had to be killed
53:20
because it's the last still to buy.
53:23
Brent goes running and he finds two of the other fraternity
53:27
brothers that we haven't actually talked about.
53:30
And he's like, Oh no, you guys too.
53:32
And they're like, don't act so upset at our death.
53:35
You don't even know our names. And he's like, sure I do.
53:37
You're turtleneck, bro. And you're flannel bro.
53:42
And they're like, you're really lucky that our names are based
53:45
on our shirt choices. Let's.
53:48
See, motherfice confronts Brent and you know, it's like taunting
53:54
him for not completing his investigation.
53:56
He goes, actually I did. I'm ready to avenge my brother
53:58
because I solved my mystery. I know who you are Motherface.
54:02
You're Ronald Reagan. Think about it, Mr. President.
54:05
The dude Bros freshman year prank to post General Cortez.
54:08
You're having metal hot air balloon did drive General Cortez
54:10
from the Brazilian embassy so you can install a puppet
54:12
dictator and turn the tide in Central America.
54:15
Oh, with their powerful pecs and extreme athleticism.
54:20
OK, never mind. I missed part of it.
54:23
It's OK, you can find it. Nope.
54:26
Yeah, I missed part of it when I screenshotted.
54:30
OK, yeah, like it's just actually gone.
54:32
Bye. Bye.
54:33
It's OK. That was good what you had
54:35
though. Yeah.
54:37
So basically and his thought process is that when they
54:42
deposed General Cortez, he realized that the Dude Bros
54:45
extreme athleticism. They're they're he's they're his
54:48
perfect secret force. They're a Delta Force.
54:51
But you can't turn that off. So that's why the other pranks
54:53
went awry, because they're actual like Secret OPS agent
54:57
It's. So stupid and.
54:59
People, it's so stupid. And he was like, damn it, I
55:01
can't believe you got me. Except then he wakes up and none
55:05
of that was true. Yeah, but it's actually the
55:10
school therapist. She used everybody's deepest
55:12
fears to slaughter them. And we get flashbacks to them
55:14
talking about their fears or not talking about their fears and
55:16
not being called out. Yeah, and that's funny.
55:20
And she was going to slaughter head cuz she was like, why
55:25
didn't you just leave this alone?
55:26
They were bad people. Why did you have to join their
55:27
rings? Perjury saves the day, though.
55:30
Yeah, he's got the skateboard that, like they gave him before,
55:33
just in case his wheelchair broke.
55:34
Yeah. And he, like, uses it to shield
55:37
Brent. As Motherface is about to stab
55:38
him, he gained mastery over the wolves and all of the creatures
55:41
of the forest. And he's also saying fuck now.
55:44
Yeah, he's saying fuck now. He was having a hard time
55:46
cursing before Brent was trying to encourage him to do that, but
55:50
he wouldn't. And now he's cursing and he's
55:51
got control of wildlife. Yeah, but while he's doing his
55:55
like, good guy monologue, Motherface kills him.
55:56
Yeah, just. Throws an axe at him that hits
55:58
him in the head. Yeah, so then she starts choking
56:01
Brent, but he summons his ghost, Tai Chi.
56:04
Yeah. Meanwhile, Sinkle is trapped to
56:08
the sacrificial rock. It's got the pentagram etching
56:11
on it, and Buttaker appears she's in the cloak.
56:15
She's like, I'm going to help you.
56:17
And he's like, no, I'm mad at you because you you lied to me
56:20
and I trusted you, and there's no way out of this.
56:23
They're going to kill me because I'm a virgin.
56:24
She goes, well, I can still help you.
56:26
So she takes his virginity. Yes, ghost.
56:30
Brock tells Brent to let the Bros in and they all go in
56:34
through his butt hole. His.
56:35
Butt hole. Yeah, and he hits mother face a
56:38
lot. He transforms into like a whole.
56:40
Other He's an amalgamation of all of them, yeah.
56:43
He beats the shit out of her, man.
56:45
Yeah, like it's like about 20 seconds.
56:47
Yeah, it just it goes on too long.
56:50
Yeah, she's definitely dead after that beat down.
56:54
Yeah, so Mother Face is defeated and Brock tells Brent that he'll
57:01
always be right here with you in your butt at the police station.
57:06
The chief is mad. He's like now we haven't
57:10
defeated the Dude Bros and he gets a call.
57:14
I didn't write down the name of the call.
57:15
It's like Supreme Lord of Darkness or something like that
57:18
like. That's hilarious.
57:20
I gotta take. This, yeah.
57:21
And we just see in the background him on the phone and
57:25
he just gets exploded. Yeah, just explodes for some
57:28
reason. Candace and Sminkler are talking
57:31
and he's like, I'm so happy now we can be together.
57:34
And she goes, there's something I need to tell you, Yeah, 'cause
57:39
he's like, oh, we can work on the the mystery of Chico's
57:42
orange shortage. And she's like, I've already
57:45
solved it. And he goes, well, that's
57:47
amazing. What's your first clue?
57:48
She goes, I'm a bag of oranges. Search your heart and know it to
57:52
be true. It's true, yeah.
57:54
And then we see flashbacks of the entire movie and everything
57:56
happening just with a bag of oranges the police kept.
57:59
On it, my favorite is like the him humping the bag of.
58:02
Oranges on the bag of oranges is something him.
58:04
To be fair, that's true. And she's like, you know what?
58:07
You have to. Do so he boobs around the nose.
58:11
Bops, bops. I know I wrote I was writing
58:14
boobs, but bops is their language for it.
58:16
Bops are on the nose. She turns into a bag of oranges
58:19
and just oranges. Start raining from the.
58:22
Sky and that kid earlier, before that got shook down by that old
58:27
dude is like looking up in the sky is like, Oh my God, he loves
58:31
it. And we cut to rip stick during
58:33
the credits. He's alive.
58:35
He's on the roof. He's playing his electric
58:36
keyboard and eating some oranges.
58:38
Yeah, he's like singing songs about how the dudes are gonna
58:40
come back and get them. Yeah, maybe they will.
58:43
Maybe I would love a Dude Bro party mask or 7.
58:47
I would too. That would be fantastic.
58:50
All right. Still a ten man.
58:52
Yeah, I'm still at the 10, too. I fucking love this movie.
58:55
Yeah, it's amazing. Talia also had a lot of fun with
59:00
it. She was sleepy at first, but
59:01
that's because it has been an exhausting week.
59:04
Yeah, but after dinner, she had enough energy to like she was
59:08
watching it the whole time. And then when the orange stuff
59:11
was happening, she was throwing a tantrum and, like, knocking
59:13
all of her stuff off the couch. She didn't want that ending for
59:15
Buttaker and Smith. She attacked me.
59:18
She made me spill my drink all over my paper.
59:20
Yeah, so I'm gonna say this is a 10 out of 10 for Talia as.
59:23
Well, yeah. I agree, including like wolves
59:25
and puppies. That's true, yeah.
59:27
Especially that scene where all the puppies attacked Turbo,
59:30
Yeah. Yeah, Zoe was going back and
59:35
forth. She would go into the kitchen
59:36
and play with her balloon. Come sit in my lap, go back and
59:39
play with her balloon, sit on your lap, go back to the balloon
59:42
again. And then she got on Lawrence
59:44
Gordon, a shark bed for the rest of the movie.
59:45
So she did watch it. Yeah.
59:46
Yeah. She that, that movie was getting
59:49
her hype too. Yeah.
59:51
OK, Who did you relate to, Travis?
59:55
Oh man, that's a tough one. Let's see.
59:58
I have to think of this. You go first.
1:00:02
Oh man, I'm torn between a few of them because on the one hand,
1:00:08
obviously Sizzler and I are are non mediating.
1:00:12
Yes, there, there's that there. But also ZQ with the camera,
1:00:16
I've definitely stopped hikes with you and with our friends.
1:00:19
To be like this is a really great angle.
1:00:20
I need to get this shot. That's true.
1:00:22
Yeah. So I think I'll lean a little
1:00:26
bit more towards ZQ, ZQ and the the fear of heights as well.
1:00:30
Oh, that's. True.
1:00:31
That's a good one. I relate to Flannel Bro because
1:00:35
I also love Flannels. That's true.
1:00:37
I would do Flannel Bro if I was going to be a bro, yeah.
1:00:41
That's that feels accurate and it feels correct.
1:00:45
OK. OK.
1:00:46
Let's see. You need a new tagline.
1:00:49
No dream sequel? Dream sequel OK, well I already
1:00:51
pitched the title. It's going to be Dude Bro Party
1:00:53
Massacre 7. Seven.
1:00:54
I I like that. Yeah.
1:00:55
OK. And it also allows them to like
1:00:59
have whatever fuckery they wanna have with the actors involved.
1:01:05
So mother face returns. Mother face returns somehow.
1:01:08
I wanna say, like, maybe it's Samantha's sister that
1:01:15
disappeared from her house because their father hated them
1:01:19
being girls. And Samantha, just like she was
1:01:22
so much. Maybe she was like Samantha's
1:01:24
younger sister that she didn't know existed.
1:01:25
Right. OK, so since this is a sequel,
1:01:27
yeah. So she's coming back to
1:01:29
adventure. But maybe instead of adventure,
1:01:31
she's trying to, like, perpetuate the Delta Bi legacy.
1:01:35
So it's kind of like A twist. Instead of murdering the Delta
1:01:37
Bias, she's trying to, like, procreate with all of them.
1:01:39
Oh, I like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:01:41
Oh, no. That makes it rapey.
1:01:43
Actually, I don't kind of like that.
1:01:45
Samantha's character is kind of like that, though.
1:01:46
That's true. Yeah.
1:01:48
Cool. So yeah, maybe something like
1:01:50
that. I think that could work, yeah.
1:01:53
Yeah, yeah, they can. They do the right amount of
1:01:56
satire. They can make it not icky or
1:01:59
like recognize that it's icky, but have fun with it.
1:02:01
Yeah, I mean, they were talking about banging kids in this
1:02:04
movie. You know what I mean?
1:02:05
Like I think he. It's not an endorsement, people.
1:02:09
It's yeah, yeah, OK. All right.
1:02:13
All right. Tagline.
1:02:14
Tagline. Yeah, I just wish we could have,
1:02:17
like, nodding as a tagline. But that's not like, that's not
1:02:21
words, OK? We're trying to make it a little
1:02:24
dumb to you, right? Yeah.
1:02:26
What about something like the only thing scarier than running
1:02:31
out of beer is watching all your Bros get massacred?
1:02:36
OK, I like that. I can actually see that being a
1:02:38
tagline. Yeah, like.
1:02:39
A classic one. Yeah, I think that's fitting.
1:02:44
OK, cool. All right, Internet review.
1:02:47
Internet Review. All right.
1:02:49
This is definitely going to be somebody who doesn't get this
1:02:51
type of fever. Maybe.
1:02:52
I don't. I don't remember.
1:02:54
OK, it was a 2 out of 10 on IMDb.
1:02:57
So they say this is the weirdest movie.
1:02:59
You shouldn't always believe the reviews of the Internet.
1:03:02
Even though it is deliberately trying to be be movie, it is not
1:03:05
really working for it. It's just becomes more and more
1:03:08
strange and it really sucks. Actually, had this been made in
1:03:11
the late 80s, it would have killed.
1:03:14
Or had it been the style suggested, one of the genre
1:03:18
movies of Peter Jackson, well then it would have been all
1:03:21
right. But to deliver this in 2015,
1:03:23
well, it's just not the same. I think sometimes people mistake
1:03:29
a movie from trying to be AB movie versus like the type of
1:03:33
humor that often goes hand in hand with B movies.
1:03:36
Yeah. And I think maybe that's a case
1:03:39
of this 'cause this is just like it's a very particular type of
1:03:44
humor that lends itself well to, like AB movie aesthetic and
1:03:50
style. Yeah, I mean they they try to do
1:03:53
it and I think that they actually like are pretty
1:03:55
successful with it. It feels very campy.
1:03:57
Yeah, it does. I'm just saying, like, I think
1:04:00
sometimes when people talk about, like, trying too hard to
1:04:02
be AB movie, they're thinking of like, stinks, Killing Three.
1:04:06
Yeah, I think that that's like a good example of that right
1:04:08
there, where it's just like a little bit too hard.
1:04:10
Yeah, like try like missing what makes something like that funny?
1:04:14
Yeah. Whereas this is like their
1:04:16
actual like sense of humor for what they do.
1:04:19
Yeah, exactly. It's stupid, it's irreverent,
1:04:23
and it's just a lot of fun. Yeah.
1:04:25
But it's smart. Stupid.
1:04:26
Exactly. Yeah.
1:04:27
It is really smart. Yeah.
1:04:29
OK. Listener Reviews OK, All right.
1:04:32
Instagram Keep Safe says, needs more Mother Face.
1:04:36
I would always be down for more mother face.
1:04:38
I would too. Maybe in the sequel maybe like
1:04:41
up the amount of mother face. Yeah, oh, multiple mother faces.
1:04:46
Multiple. It'd be like ghost face.
1:04:48
Yeah. All right.
1:04:52
Also, Michael E Howard Dubrow Massacre Three is one of the
1:04:56
most ridiculous horror movies I have seen in a while.
1:04:58
It is also some of the most fun I have had watching a movie in a
1:05:01
long while. The comedy is cheesy.
1:05:03
The kill's a blast. I must see what people or I must
1:05:07
say watch for people with a sense of humor 8.5 out of 10.
1:05:12
OK, yeah, it's. I mean, I love this movie.
1:05:16
It's. Definitely one of the more
1:05:17
ridiculous movies. Yeah, it's you.
1:05:19
You. It's not you're not going into
1:05:21
your first series. Sorry, but no.
1:05:23
Like, there are some serious kills and there is like the
1:05:25
serious mystery with it, kind of, even though we know from the
1:05:28
beginning it's the therapist. But like getting the wrap up of.
1:05:31
Why? It's just pure mindless fun.
1:05:33
But it's like actually, like well written jokes.
1:05:36
Yeah, yeah, OK. And that's actually if this one
1:05:43
from Doc Fark. I don't know.
1:05:44
I saw his I like it. I want to include it all right
1:05:47
'cause I agree with his sentiment.
1:05:49
All right, this is the final one.
1:05:51
Over on Twitter, Doc Fark says. I'm just so grateful to live in
1:05:54
a world where there's a Dude Bro Party Massacre 3.
1:05:57
I'm fairly certain I've said those exact words.
1:06:00
That's true. I think I've said that exact
1:06:02
sentence. That's true, man.
1:06:04
That's a good thing to have out there.
1:06:05
I love the I just love it. It's so great.
1:06:08
This is the correct part of the timeline, you know?
1:06:11
Yeah. All right.
1:06:13
All right. That's it.
1:06:13
That's it. We got through that a lot
1:06:15
quicker than I expected. Yeah, I know, right?
1:06:16
Like that. Actually, when you actually get
1:06:18
into the, like, the meat of what this movie is, it's not a.
1:06:21
Lot of it is jokes, Yeah, A lot of it's.
1:06:24
Just jokes. You can't tell every single
1:06:25
joke. Yeah, y'all aren't here to
1:06:28
listen to us repeat jokes. Yeah, just watch the movie, man.
1:06:30
It's so worth it. OK, next week we're back on our
1:06:34
saw. Shit.
1:06:35
Yeah. And we're going to Jigsaw cuz we
1:06:39
speak for the dead right now. You can stream that on MGM
1:06:44
Prime, YouTube, Sling TV, YouTube TV, Philo, or you can
1:06:51
rent it from Google Play or Fandango at home.
1:06:53
Once again, you can also just buy it for cheap.
1:06:56
It is cheap. Cheap.
1:06:57
It's on sale. A what?
1:06:59
Yeah, Yep, we've got this. Yeah, we've got the 4K, the
1:07:02
fork. Yeah, we've got the fork.
1:07:07
Spoiler. We're probably gonna defend this
1:07:08
movie more than you guys expect. I'm curious, man.
1:07:11
Like this is one that like, I've it's not totally.
1:07:14
I thought it's. I've defended Jigsaw and Spiral
1:07:16
in the past. I am curious to see how I will
1:07:19
feel when I'm like doing a more critical view on it.
1:07:22
That's how I felt. Serious.
1:07:23
Yeah, it'll be interesting. Yeah, it'll be interesting.
1:07:26
Yeah. I've given up on the timeline
1:07:28
with this franchise though after after 3D.
1:07:31
Come on, man, this is one of the most consistent timelines in all
1:07:34
of the horror franchises. Can't like, wait until we get to
1:07:37
Texas Chainsaw? It's going to be pure time you.
1:07:41
Are you are fully responsible for that time?
1:07:43
Like I hope you take it. To be taking one of those dry
1:07:45
race boards and making me a timeline as we go along because
1:07:48
I can't keep track. I'll make one of the timelines
1:07:50
that we did for Halloween too. Yeah, no, but I need it as we go
1:07:53
along because I won't. Oh, yeah.
1:07:55
No, we'll keep track of it. I'll make it visual.
1:07:57
Yeah. No, we'll, we'll do this, man.
1:07:58
We'll do it the right. Way, all right.
1:08:01
All right, cool. So I guess we'll see you guys
1:08:03
then. Yeah, we want to give a shout
1:08:06
out your patrons, your. Patrons are wonderful bubbies
1:08:10
over on the Patreon website if you want to join them.
1:08:12
You can find that link down below in our show notes at the
1:08:14
very bottom. But in the meantime, a huge
1:08:17
shout out grateful thank you to Joe Ficatron, as is his name
1:08:21
Amber, Michael, Lord Zombie and Tyler.
1:08:24
Yeah. Thank you guys so much.
1:08:26
You guys are awesome. We appreciate you guys so much.
1:08:28
You keep the lights on on our website, which by the way is
1:08:31
what you least here at scarymovie.com if you want to
1:08:34
help the show in non monetary ways.
1:08:37
Totally cool. Get it?
1:08:38
It's a recession. Things are like crazy right now.
1:08:42
You can just follow us on whatever you're listening on.
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You can write us. If you want to throw a couple
1:08:47
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1:08:50
It just tells the algorithm that we're nice and you think we're
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nice. Super nice.
1:08:53
Yeah, super nice. Yeah.
1:08:56
You can also follow us on social media.
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1:09:00
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1:09:05
favorite scarymovie@gmail.com. You got it.
1:09:10
Is that it? You got it.
1:09:11
OK, that's cool. And I almost forgot to do all of
1:09:14
this, so I'm glad I hit all of the points.
1:09:17
You beef boxed, You beefed. I beefed.
1:09:20
Hey, congratulations. Thank you.
1:09:23
She's out-of-the-box, people. I'm out.
1:09:24
Of the box. Oh my God, do you remember the
1:09:26
show out-of-the-box? No.
1:09:28
Oh my God, the theme song just came flooding to my head.
1:09:33
OK, OK. That's.
1:09:35
It Until next time. See ya.
1:09:37
Bye, bye. Sorry if you get chicken burps
1:09:52
going your way. I'm trying my best to keep them
1:09:54
to my song. Thank you.