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Bonus IMPROV - Floating Your Cares Away · Very Fine Friends

• 0:00
  welcome to very fine friends bonus improv oh
• 0:22
  would you like to do some improv
• 0:26
  I would I'm gonna do it right now
• 0:28
  great
• 0:30
  I love improv
• 0:32
  imagine this is the first episode somebody
• 0:34
  listens to
• 0:35
  what would be worth about that
• 0:38
  like I'm losing my own
• 0:42
  made up accent
• 0:43
  I was hearing Maya Rudolph in there
• 0:46
  what I was really channeling
• 0:50
  was Jennifer Coolidge
• 0:52
  in Frasier.
• 0:54
  She plays,
• 0:55
  she's the home
• 0:57
  healthcare worker
• 0:58
  that takes over
• 0:59
  for Daphne
• 1:00
  when Daphne.
• 1:01
  Daphne Moon.
• 1:02
  Yeah, Daphne Moon
• 1:03
  when she gets married
• 1:05
  or engaged.
• 1:06
  Anyway,
• 1:06
  when she gets married,
• 1:07
  I think.
• 1:07
  She gets mooned.
• 1:09
  Yeah.
• 1:10
  And she comes in
• 1:10
  and she's some like
• 1:11
  vaguely like
• 1:12
  German or Bavarian
• 1:14
  or something.
• 1:15
  Oh no,
• 1:16
  Mr. Craig.
• 1:18
  You have to do your work.
• 1:22
  Joe, what a suggestion.
• 1:27
  Yes, you can.
• 1:29
  It's a fun voice to do.
• 1:31
  Your suggestion is recklessness.
• 1:37
  What's the craziest thing you've ever done, Francis?
• 1:41
  The craziest thing I've ever done?
• 1:42
  Yeah.
• 1:44
  A lot.
• 1:45
  Okay.
• 1:46
  Not in a van with your dad's friend in a fuzzy navel.
• 1:49
  Just drinking with a guy.
• 1:52
  Um, crazy, crazy, crazy.
• 1:56
  Or can you think of it like, okay, I'm thinking about a time when I was very proud of myself
• 2:00
  at the time.
• 2:02
  Um, I was 16 years old.
• 2:04
  I was in the car with my friends.
• 2:06
  I was driving and there was a car full of boys, 16 year old or at the same age.
• 2:11
  They were next to us.
• 2:12
  And they're definitely like trying to like, we were kind of, but they were, it was like,
• 2:18
  it was dangerous
• 2:20
  but it was like
• 2:21
  it wasn't like we were like
• 2:22
  angry at each other
• 2:23
  it was like they were definitely
• 2:24
  being playful
• 2:25
  but
• 2:26
  they
• 2:27
  there was a point in time
• 2:29
  when I was driving
• 2:30
  and I was in front
• 2:31
  and I was in front of them
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  and
• 2:34
  they were like
• 2:37
  really like
• 2:37
  really hardcore on my tail like right behind me and I was like I could slam on the brakes right now and they would definitely rear end me and it would be all their fault and i didn do it and i was really proud
• 2:48
  of myself for not doing it right they probably got a cake in that car yeah um yeah anyway
• 2:57
  that is kind of crazy yeah you know what that reminds me of one time my friend and i we were
• 3:03
  when we were like 18 or 19 we were going to the strip club sure and um we took like she was driving
• 3:11
  one of her parents cars um hey girl anyway um she it was like a rainy night and she turned out onto
• 3:20
  bell road and we we went into a spin because yeah it was really scary and um she had a
• 3:28
  this is was funny to me in the moment even though we were like an imminent danger of dying but i
• 3:32
  still thought it was hilarious she had a headband on god i love a headband anyway um
• 3:37
  we once we started spinning the headband fell into her eyes and she was driving so they look
• 3:43
  like the the glasses from star trek exactly but so but you couldn't see anything so she had no and
• 3:48
  i was seeing this and i thought it was very funny and i wasn't laughing but i was in my head
• 3:53
  i'm like if we're gonna die this is a funny like last thing to see like she can't even save us now
• 3:58
  and so we're spinning and then we hit the median and there's traffic on the other side of the
• 4:06
  medium and we go over the median and i see a clear opening into the driveway of a big five
• 4:12
  i think that's what they were called and i'm like oh my god we're gonna make it into this
• 4:18
  like it's a miracle and right when i had the thought a jetta like came like speeding through
• 4:24
  and like smacked right into us.
• 4:26
  Oh, geez.
• 4:27
  Yeah.
• 4:29
  My friend didn't make it.
• 4:31
  I'm kidding.
• 4:31
  She's alive.
• 4:34
  You also gave her a shout out
• 4:35
  at the beginning of that story.
• 4:36
  Hey, girl.
• 4:39
  Anyway, yeah, that was crazy though.
• 4:41
  Man.
• 4:42
  Yeah.
• 4:42
  Oof.
• 4:43
  We still went.
• 4:46
  We ended up driving in a different car.
• 4:49
  I think I was like,
• 4:50
  come on.
• 4:53
  We're alive.
• 4:54
  gonna celebrate wow yeah harrowing it was harrowing yeah good word and now improv
• 5:05
  donald donald are you okay you okay oh god oh man oh my neck i'm so sorry my back
• 5:18
  Oh, man.
• 5:22
  That squirrel came out of nowhere Owie Oh Why didn you just run it over Oh I in so much pain Oh I know It was just instinct It was my instinct to save a life
• 5:32
  Oh.
• 5:34
  Tabitha, what about my life?
• 5:36
  Oh, no, I'm sorry.
• 5:38
  It was reflex.
• 5:39
  It was all...
• 5:40
  Oh, my God.
• 5:41
  Look at the car.
• 5:41
  It's ruined, and I got a whippy.
• 5:44
  Oh, honey.
• 5:47
  Oh, well.
• 5:48
  What do we do?
• 5:49
  I'll call AAA.
• 5:50
  Hold on.
• 5:50
  oh no time for that just i'll just use the app just grab just grab the the beach towels
• 5:58
  out of the back and oh good idea to wrap myself in the no no honey oh you're the floaty can be a
• 6:04
  tourniquet oh god you're smart no no we just we're still going to the water park let's go
• 6:09
  come on oh oh i needed that oh you can still make me laugh after all these years no no honey no no
• 6:17
  I got those day passes.
• 6:19
  They're only good for today.
• 6:22
  Okay, the bit's getting old.
• 6:24
  No, no, no.
• 6:25
  No, I'm going, honey.
• 6:26
  So we're both going.
• 6:28
  What?
• 6:29
  We're going.
• 6:30
  My bone's coming out.
• 6:33
  And think about how much lighter you'll feel in water.
• 6:38
  Just floating your cares away.
• 6:39
  Honey, honey.
• 6:41
  Couldn't you use a lazy river right now?
• 6:44
  Can you call the police?
• 6:44
  I could.
• 6:45
  I'm calling the fun police.
• 6:49
  I'm calling the fun police.
• 6:51
  Because we're going to Wacky Jack's Splash and Crash.
• 6:55
  You think maybe they'll have an EMT?
• 6:59
  There's two of you right now, Tabitha.
• 7:02
  An extra motion-y tidal pool?
• 7:05
  Yes, I think they'll have one of those.
• 7:07
  Tabitha, I don't think you understand.
• 7:09
  My mother's standing right next to you.
• 7:11
  It's getting dark.
• 7:12
  honey honey your dead mother will still be there after after we go to wacky jack splash and crash
• 7:23
  okay come on just honey hey hey i didn't show you this earlier look look i'm opening my robe
• 7:31
  new bathing suit honey i want to support you but my intestines are on the floor
• 7:38
  oh god honey i i'll pack them back in oh here look here put a this this floaty frog ring look
• 7:50
  there's a keeping it's keeping your intestines there's a road sign it's it says the hospital's
• 7:55
  on the way to the water park can't we just that's such a weird sign i never understood why they put
• 8:01
  it there i guess i get it now yeah just take me there first and guess what if it on the way to the hospital it on the way back to the hospital is on the way back from the water park We going honey God we been looking forward to this all summer
• 8:18
  It's been such a long summer, and our air conditioning is broken at home.
• 8:21
  And my bones are broken here.
• 8:25
  Honey.
• 8:26
  You go.
• 8:26
  I'll hobble to the...
• 8:27
  No, you know it's only fun if we both go.
• 8:30
  Come on, just give it a shot.
• 8:34
  We'll get in there.
• 8:36
  Do a little lazy river action.
• 8:38
  We'll go in the wave pool.
• 8:40
  We'll do one water slide.
• 8:42
  And after that, after we've done all that,
• 8:44
  if you don't still want to stick around,
• 8:47
  then fine.
• 8:48
  We will go to the boring hospital.
• 8:51
  I don't think I'm going to be around.
• 8:55
  Yeah, because you'll be in the wave pool with me.
• 8:57
  All right.
• 8:58
  Just let me call my...
• 8:59
  Let me tell a health appointment.
• 9:01
  Someone needs to see this to make sure it's okay.
• 9:02
  We can do it on the way.
• 9:04
  cut to the water park
• 9:06
  whoa
• 9:08
  whoa
• 9:11
  whoa
• 9:12
  how do you feel
• 9:15
  you were right this is great
• 9:18
  oh honey
• 9:19
  oh look I can see where you've been in the lazy
• 9:22
  river because of the blood
• 9:23
  oh my gosh
• 9:25
  and my
• 9:27
  bone is still out
• 9:29
  oh my god whose intestines are these
• 9:32
  oh they're mine
• 9:33
  I'm sorry.
• 9:35
  Oh my God.
• 9:36
  You know what we should do next?
• 9:37
  What?
• 9:38
  Go to the hospital.
• 9:40
  I don't feel good.
• 9:41
  Donald.
• 9:43
  Tabitha.
• 9:45
  Okay.
• 9:46
  Just.
• 9:47
  We just.
• 9:48
  One.
• 9:49
  Frozen berry blast drink first.
• 9:51
  Okay.
• 9:52
  Please.
• 9:53
  Please.
• 9:54
  Okay.
• 9:54
  We're here already.
• 9:56
  We're already.
• 9:57
  We're already here.
• 9:58
  We're here already.
• 9:58
  All right.
• 10:00
  One drink.
• 10:01
  I'll have one blueberry broken man drink.
• 10:07
  Honey, you're ordering it all wrong.
• 10:09
  There's a lifeguard.
• 10:11
  Yeah.
• 10:12
  Wave him down.
• 10:13
  We can both get what we want.
• 10:15
  Okay.
• 10:16
  Oh, here's the lifeguard.
• 10:19
  Mr. Lifeguard?
• 10:21
  Sir?
• 10:23
  Yes?
• 10:25
  Can I get a blueberry smoothie?
• 10:27
  I got a couple of blueberries for you
• 10:32
  honey it's a stripper
• 10:34
  lifeguard I ordered them just for you
• 10:36
  teen