Latest / Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr. / Shardae Orr On Marrying Her Boss, Kidney Transplant, Faith, Marriage Vows, Miscarriage & Healing

Transcript

Shardae Orr On Marrying Her Boss, Kidney Transplant, Faith, Marriage Vows, Miscarriage & Healing · Love You Moore with Willie Moore Jr.

• 0:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yo, this is Willy Mode Jr here at the House of the Love You More Show.
• 0:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I got a challenge for you, and I want you to be a part of it.
• 0:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's absolutely free.
• 0:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: We're about to take our finances, our family, and our fitness to a home, another level.
• 0:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: I want you to do this challenge with me, and it's gonna revolutionize and challenge every part of your life to take you to the next level.
• 0:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: So, family, do me a favor, go to loveyoumore.com.
• 0:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: Forward Slash, F.
• 0:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: Three, seven day challenge is gonna revolutionize your life.
• 0:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: I guarantee you, go now, stop for the episode.
• 0:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: Fletta.
• 0:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Next, on the love of your worship, I knew about the woman who he had been dating.
• 0:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: I knew about, you know, them going through their eggs and flows and then him dating other people.
• 0:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like I'd watched him play with people.
• 0:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, you know about to play with me.
• 0:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: No, it's a no for that.
• 0:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you want to be together, we can be together because you date people to get to know them, but you know me.
• 1:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: So we'll be dating for it.
• 1:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like, what should you name it?
• 1:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why hasn't sex?
• 1:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: We in charge for days.
• 1:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: This man got in house.
• 1:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: Come on.
• 1:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: He got a car.
• 1:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: He got a good job.
• 1:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: He took it off.
• 1:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: He got a good family.
• 1:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 1:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: Makes all of this on paper.
• 1:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: and God was like, no, this ain't it.
• 1:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: In 2019, I started having symptoms, and I hope it's not too graphic, but like having blood in my urine, crazy migraines, and it happened once in 2016.
• 1:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: And when I went to the doctor say, we're like, oh, yep, you TI.
• 1:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm like, oh, okay, cool.
• 1:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm thinking because y'all have my chart, everything, all my family history is in my chart.
• 1:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: So if there was something else, it would have looked forward.
• 1:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just had them to be on the phone my mom is tired.
• 1:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: My mom said, tell them to run a full renal panel on you.
• 1:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: Tell them you need to know your B-wing, your creatinine, your G-F-R, all of it.
• 1:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: How does mom do?
• 2:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: She's RN, so my mom, I grew up.
• 2:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: She's been a nurse for my entire life.
• 2:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: She was nursing, which was pregnant with me.
• 2:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, and so the doctor's like, oh, that's one of your bloods that are that she, like, tell him, put it in your chart if he not gonna do it.
• 2:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so he's like, all right, I send you back to the lab.
• 2:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: Wait 30 minutes, go back into his office.
• 2:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: He opens this screen.
• 2:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: calls in a nurse and says, put her in a bus, her kidneys are feeling.
• 2:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it's like, in that instant, everything else makes sense, that did not make sense.
• 2:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: It made me realize God was never keeping something from me.
• 2:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was always keeping me for something.
• 2:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: I was married for a real long time.
• 2:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I often look at those vows.
• 2:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I remember reading the vows.
• 2:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: Those of you who are married, I want to encourage you to go back and look at those vows.
• 2:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: They got to a port that really, really shook me.
• 2:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: I remember looking at my marriage video.
• 2:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: And they were like, for richer or for poor.
• 2:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: When they said for richer and for poor, I was like, don't the Bible say speak those days that are not as though they were, that the Bible and life are dead, it's in the tongue.
• 3:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's how when I did the vows, like for richer and for, ah.
• 3:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, well, life's still here and it was really, really tough, but it got to another part that I didn't have to endure, but my next next guess she had to endure, right, all while being married and sickness and in hell.
• 3:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so today to those of you who are in relationships, you have to be aware that there's some ebs and flows in life that you cannot forecast.
• 3:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: And when they do come, you have to be strong enough to lean on God's word.
• 3:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I believe that I got about three or four people with that shoe in the comments.
• 3:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: Just put the do-sup.
• 3:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: So it's like, peace.
• 3:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna, I'm gonna do it.
• 3:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: All right.
• 3:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Now, before you meet this guest, I'm gonna give you an opportunity to do it.
• 3:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: I always ask you to do.
• 3:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: Come on, say it with me.
• 3:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: Subscribe.
• 3:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: Okay.
• 3:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: If you have not become a part of the love you more family, which I've so candidly coined the flat out family, because I say flat out, right?
• 3:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: Uh, you need to.
• 3:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: So I'm going to wait for two seconds.
• 3:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you.
• 3:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: All right, family.
• 4:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: Listen, it is time now to hang out with one of the most phenomenal speakers.
• 4:04
  [SPEAKER_02]: She is truly a jewel.
• 4:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: She's, she's, she's worked with the likes of Creflo Dollar myself and so many others shout out to our friends that ready a one, but she's a voice and a name that you are definitely going to need to know in the upcoming years.
• 4:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: Of course, if you're on TikTok, you see all the time.
• 4:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: She blowing up.
• 4:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: If you on Instagram, you see all the times she blowing up.
• 4:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: The one and only, I'm gonna say, Charlotte, they pressly now, Charlotte, they are because I know her daddy when she was impressed.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, Charlotte, how you doing?
• 4:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: You are hilarious.
• 4:34
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I know you, I know both of y'all.
• 4:37
  [SPEAKER_06]: You know both of me.
• 4:38
  [SPEAKER_06]: And you know my daddy.
• 4:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yes, indeed.
• 4:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know where I come from.
• 4:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, man.
• 4:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm so proud of you.
• 4:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Let me just say that Right, I'd full transparency.
• 4:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm riding and then I get on my trail meal because trail meals were got meet me.
• 4:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: I think you got to know it like my after work out Little trail meal no music.
• 4:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: No nothing.
• 4:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just like okay, God download it If you don't download it, I go to his Bible.
• 5:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: I put it in my ear and then I buy
• 5:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: There you go.
• 5:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: Now you talking and literally you came in my heart and I was like, Sharday, I want to really have a great conversation with you because you're a newly kind of newly with.
• 5:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't even marry her.
• 5:11
  [SPEAKER_06]: It will be five years in December.
• 5:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: I mean still it's still considered new yeah that is huge so on the love you more show show today we have this thing that we like the call of ice breaker now this ice breaker is a little different than traditional ice breakers because it's not a corny joke that you have to wait like five seconds to get right it's actually music now you knew me and my relationship and we try coulchler and this is kind of what have checked this up
• 5:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: So wifey started counseling and she thought it would be a good idea for me to come to counseling.
• 5:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: Man, I don't know about everything I'm gonna do this.
• 5:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: Cause I know she's been telling this woman all my business.
• 5:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: I walk in the counseling.
• 5:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: Duh!
• 5:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: I didn't know her counsel was this fine.
• 5:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: She been telling all my business.
• 5:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: I walk in.
• 5:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hey ladies, oh, um, I was at the wrong spot and I'm uh, thank you for joining us truly my honor Willy Maltzhe nice to meet you my honor.
• 6:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: This is my counselor April so nice to meet her wifey like so glad you can make it darling It's truly my honor.
• 6:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: You look amazing you do too energy in the room a little tears wife and tell my business
• 6:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: So let's talk this out and from a hug I'm like, okay, you ready?
• 6:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: I am, you know, whatever you want me to do, I'm with it.
• 6:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: Are you going to tell the truth?
• 6:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: I promise I'm going to tell the truth, you weren't it?
• 6:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I was a little like a Christmas tree when I told her she was worth the child.
• 6:41
  [SPEAKER_01]: I would do you better, that's what shit I'm gonna have for you, it's like a clock around, you know what stops, this is, you know?
• 6:48
  [SPEAKER_03]: Listen, now I am not in my room, but I can tell you don't be overlooper, what's funny is I'm overlooper
• 7:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: The name of the song is Clockwork.
• 7:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: It now features Q Parker from 112 that's coming out in, well, probably out when you watch it, but make sure you go check it out.
• 7:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, Shardate in that particular song, it just talks about literally saying I do and the evs and flows and the ups and downs that come with marriage.
• 8:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: And for us, you know, intimacy usually connects us back again, but as a newlywed,
• 8:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: a woman who had been in the industry for a long time.
• 8:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you, God, when you're going to send my boys, I'm so tired of broke it, play it.
• 8:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm tired of all of them.
• 8:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like what was it, what is it like for you now?
• 8:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: What have you learned the most about yourself being married?
• 8:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, I think what I've learned the most about myself being married is the person who's truly for you will show you the good and bad parts of yourself and love you through it anyway.
• 8:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think that I've learned that I have the capacity to love a person past what I think is what I need in the moment.
• 8:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think what I found my husband the thing is I wasn't looking for him at all.
• 8:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, wow.
• 8:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: And what we think we need a lot of times the list that we have and what we want in a man is not what is going to carry you through to five years because that's what I'm at.
• 8:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know what I mean?
• 8:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: But I feel like my husband's the man that's going to carry me into my forever.
• 9:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know what I mean?
• 9:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think what I learned about myself is at times what I thought I needed the most, really did not matter when the rubber method rose.
• 9:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's so good.
• 9:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: I remember 2018, I met world changers in our C-shirt day.
• 9:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: I hit on my church and did this, this, this, this, this,
• 9:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, you know, it's doing them times.
• 9:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm married and, you know, I think all the ladies like, you know, you see a good dude, let me know.
• 9:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then like, Charlotte, you a kid.
• 9:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then I go meet Charlotte.
• 9:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I see this guy, he's over there.
• 9:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: And he's looking at me talk the Charlotte day.
• 9:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: I thought he was that doing like, oh, that's my boss.
• 9:34
  [SPEAKER_02]: And this guy, no, that was like, Charlotte.
• 9:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's the thing, that's the job, that's the thing, that's the job, that's the thing.
• 9:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm really, that's my, because she's so politically great.
• 9:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's my mom's own, that I'm like, that make role right there like you.
• 9:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: I know, I did not let you say it.
• 9:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: You said it.
• 9:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: You definitely said that.
• 9:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: I will say, I think it was lower earlier than that.
• 9:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's 2018.
• 9:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was on the pump.
• 9:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was at Comcast by then.
• 9:58
  [SPEAKER_03]: Okay.
• 9:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: This was like 2016.
• 10:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I'm in my member.
• 10:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: He was looking like, oh my, no, man, this was my sister, but I just seen them.
• 10:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: I was like, he like you.
• 10:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't get what you.
• 10:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: I was like, something going on in this wood pile.
• 10:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not in the loophouse.
• 10:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: So do you, so who had to make a decision?
• 10:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: Did you have to like start working there?
• 10:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, I worked together.
• 10:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: How did they work?
• 10:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so it's funny because I feel like I've never told this story on a platform this large before.
• 10:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 10:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I feel like when me and my husband realized that we liked each other, it was during a season where he had tried to hook me up with his friend.
• 10:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: that didn't work out, but his friend, this was a red flag in the first place.
• 10:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: The friend wouldn't go out with me by himself.
• 10:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: Come on, Flo.
• 10:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said something right about that!
• 10:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: What is making it?
• 10:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was like, you know, he said he want to be, you know, he don't want to be seen out in public with you because y'all aren't officially, I said, okay, whatever.
• 10:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: So he set up like a group situation.
• 10:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: So it's like six of his hanging out, we're doing game nights, we're going to six flags.
• 10:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: And my husband is one of the people who's there.
• 11:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: But I'm supposed to be getting to know the forehead.
• 11:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: But the whole time we're all hanging out, me and him, is kicking about the front.
• 11:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because I knew the friend was not, he was not it for me, immediately.
• 11:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: But I think on the tail end of a hanging out, I was like, I think I like this man.
• 11:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I never forget when I got promoted to outreach program manager or something like that.
• 11:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: I got into a different building.
• 11:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: God, I knew something like a
• 11:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: I moved to a different building and he went reach out for the most arbitrary reasons.
• 11:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: He would be like, y'all, you'd be watching Game of Thrones.
• 11:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, yeah, it's pretty cool.
• 11:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: He'd be like, yeah, I just wanted to see if you've been watching it because I really liked that.
• 11:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm like, do you just need a reason to talk to me?
• 11:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because you can talk to me without being weird.
• 11:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think from there, he wanted to start dating.
• 11:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: I thought I'm no.
• 11:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: I said, you can date me.
• 11:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why?
• 11:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because I have watched him date me.
• 11:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, you're terrible.
• 11:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'd say, because we were friends at that point.
• 12:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: I feel like we become very good friends.
• 12:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm talking.
• 12:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I knew about the woman who he had been dating.
• 12:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: I knew about, you know, them going through their eggs and flows and then him dating other people.
• 12:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like I'd watched him play with people.
• 12:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, you know about to play with me.
• 12:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: No, it's a no for me.
• 12:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you want to be together, we can be together, because you date people to get to know them, but you know me, so will we date and for?
• 12:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: So do you think it's okay to have that type of stance like if you, because I like the stance like we know each other, what we get to know each other for, we don't work together for years now.
• 12:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Right.
• 12:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think that it's okay to have whatever standard you have said, if you believe that, someone should be able to meet it.
• 12:46
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think in that season, I said, ain't no way that you can't meet the standard that I'm setting, because you know me.
• 12:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: So what other intel do you need via dating to figure out
• 12:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: You think you want to date to me says you want to put me in the rotation that I've seen you have and I'm not going to be a part of that.
• 13:04
  [SPEAKER_02]: So what turns your mind.
• 13:04
  [SPEAKER_02]: So Willie, I think that for me.
• 13:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: We ended up finally going out on a date because I like the man.
• 13:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm giving it on this like it was a certain point where it was like, okay, I like this person.
• 13:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: I want to spend time with them like all of these different things.
• 13:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so I feel like we mean pursue with they once you all wear a woman down, eventually you got to wear that.
• 13:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: I got a word down after being pursued, making plans.
• 13:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'll never forget one day he was like, oh, I got tickets to the lights at the botanical garden.
• 13:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Botanical gardens, okay.
• 13:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was like, I got tickets and he said the tickets.
• 13:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: So when I was like, I'm not going out with you.
• 13:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, yeah.
• 13:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was like, well, you could have had a ticket stand at the right.
• 13:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I took a friend of mine.
• 13:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: I took my roommate.
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, my god.
• 13:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: You said no one took the ticket.
• 13:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes, and then, but he kept doing stuff like that.
• 13:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was persistent.
• 13:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: And then the first time that we went on a day, we went to a Hawks game at State Farm Arena.
• 14:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: What were your seats as you?
• 14:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: I, they were in a hundred section.
• 14:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: They weren't on the floor.
• 14:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: No, I said, I just, you know,
• 14:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm just trying to get the vision of that.
• 14:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: Okay, I remember exactly what I had on.
• 14:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was like a kimono.
• 14:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was like a tan tank top, some jeans, some heels.
• 14:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: So he was hiding the goods.
• 14:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was cute, but I was hiding the goods.
• 14:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know?
• 14:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so I feel like we went on a date.
• 14:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: We dated for a little while.
• 14:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'll never forget during that season, I felt like if he's dating me, I know he's dating other people.
• 14:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I went to God and I was like, God, what are we doing?
• 14:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: What are we doing?
• 14:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think one thing that I have to mention, you know, and I don't want to get deep because, you know, everybody don't believe in like signs.
• 14:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: I mean, who's wondering, all of those deep is okay.
• 14:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, like I like when you be sure they listen, come on, we got to say get back to when I was assistant the year was 2014, I moved to your August of 2014 and
• 15:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: August of 2013, and I got an engaged to someone who's in the music industry, and our lives were just intertwined.
• 15:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: Just because we were in similar industries, we knew a lot of the same people, and God basically told us not to get me separately.
• 15:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: I had just really found a lure.
• 15:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: It started speaking in tongues.
• 15:28
  [SPEAKER_07]: Different things like that.
• 15:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: I really like, okay, I got the whole list there.
• 15:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, it was a good move.
• 15:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: And when I heard that it was just like it didn't make sense in 2013 when God, we got engaged in August and in October, God was like, not this night.
• 15:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, family, Willie Mojoon, you're here.
• 15:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Liz, um, I really, I'm sorry that I interrupt this kind.
• 15:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know what I'm not sorry.
• 15:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: You have not subscribed.
• 15:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, I need you to go ahead and subscribe real quick because I don't know you want to get back to this look good for it.
• 15:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's what I'm talking about.
• 15:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: You do it, cool, back to the show.
• 15:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: Go show our day.
• 15:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: Tell them.
• 15:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like, what should we in a minute?
• 15:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: Way ahead, six.
• 16:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: We in church four days, we.
• 16:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: We love you, you.
• 16:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: This man got a house.
• 16:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: Come on.
• 16:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: He got a car, he got a good job.
• 16:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: He checking out the box.
• 16:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: He got a good family.
• 16:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, it makes sense.
• 16:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: It makes all the people.
• 16:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: OK.
• 16:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: And God was like, now, this ain't it.
• 16:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, I got something to question.
• 16:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: We're going here.
• 16:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: And.
• 16:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: When God told me this ain't it, I said, I don't really hear from the Lord yet.
• 16:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just started being a son.
• 16:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm not saved enough to hurt God.
• 16:29
  [SPEAKER_06]: I'm not saved enough to trust my Holy Ghost yet.
• 16:32
  [SPEAKER_06]: No, I ain't saved enough.
• 16:33
  [SPEAKER_06]: It's I said, I'm gonna keep going.
• 16:34
  [SPEAKER_06]: So we put deposits on the venue.
• 16:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: And then I had no idea.
• 16:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes, right before it was either it was holiday season.
• 16:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was on tour with someone in Europe.
• 16:46
  [SPEAKER_07]: He calls me and he says, God said that I'm not in the right place in my life to get married.
• 16:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, what do you want me to do with that?
• 16:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he was like, well, maybe we could just go back to like court and stuff like that and I was like, I'm not doing that.
• 17:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he was like, well, let me pray on it.
• 17:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he came back.
• 17:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'll never forget, we sat in my mom's driveway for three hours crying.
• 17:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he was like, we can't do it.
• 17:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: We can't get married.
• 17:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: And the day after that, I sat in my mom's basement.
• 17:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: I deleted my Instagram because back then, you couldn't deactivate it.
• 17:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: You just had to throw the whole thing away.
• 17:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: deactivate it in my Facebook.
• 17:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I cried out to God because I was like, I didn't done all the things.
• 17:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so fast for it, oh wait, you wanna ask questions before we fast for it?
• 17:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Add to the question.
• 17:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: I do have to ask this little part right quick.
• 17:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yes.
• 17:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: So your mom and him kind of probably know him.
• 17:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
• 17:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like him, everybody has this expectation.
• 17:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: What was the pressure like I'm now having to present to the world that all right guys.
• 17:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: So this is not going to work.
• 17:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like did you all feel any pressure with family?
• 17:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: Because a lot of times when you've dating, you got this family involved.
• 17:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like how did you navigate that part?
• 17:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: Because they still ask and we're all such a good.
• 18:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: And you're like, I'm triggered because they're not here.
• 18:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, I ran really that it's part of the reason how I ended up in Atlanta.
• 18:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: 24, so you just sleep on the bottom of the city.
• 18:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: I said, I can't.
• 18:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: I said, Laura, I can't.
• 18:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: I can't, like, it was too, we met in February.
• 18:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: We got engaged in August to be broken up by October, November was embarrassing.
• 18:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was just like, how do I face people who, and August was like, girl, you don't need notice me.
• 18:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: Anyway, it's been four seasons with him.
• 18:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I don't know, it was like, I can't handle the pressure.
• 18:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know what I mean?
• 18:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: I remember my dad coming into my room and you didn't met my dad.
• 18:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, he's my type of guy.
• 18:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: He-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he
• 19:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: move.
• 19:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm sending you somewhere else.
• 19:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I kept hearing Atlanta in the spirit.
• 19:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: And at this one, I'm like, I didn't listen the last time to the point where he had to member go, me because I clearly was on this.
• 19:23
  [SPEAKER_02]: And yeah, so you start working and you meet this guy that you like them immediately, did you notice them or just like, it's just, um, because I think you like it's assistant.
• 19:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: I mean, this is the the craziest part is I got a job at the church.
• 19:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: I did not apply for the job at the
• 19:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, I got a call from Asia.
• 19:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: They were like, hey, we got your resume.
• 19:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: I ascended to a friend to get like a TV job over there.
• 19:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: No, not at the church.
• 19:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like she was working with Turner in different days.
• 19:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like, how did you even get my resume?
• 19:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like, I don't want to work in a church.
• 19:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: But long story short, um, did this interview, got a second interview.
• 20:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: They called me back within two hours and said, can you be here in two weeks?
• 20:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I packed everything I could fit in my Chevy Malibu.
• 20:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: And when I met my husband, it was during orientation.
• 20:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: He tells a story better than I do because he makes him angry to this day.
• 20:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, but he was banning that checkpoint.
• 20:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: So if you've ever been to our church and you come to that and building, there's this area caught check point.
• 20:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: Mm-hmm.
• 20:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: Is this a security checkpoint?
• 20:28
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes.
• 20:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was standing in front of it.
• 20:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was rushing in from lunch for orientation, and he's like, hi, my name is Senator.
• 20:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: I didn't even hear the name.
• 20:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because when I was interviewing the man on on the website was a talk African-looking man.
• 20:41
  [SPEAKER_05]: Mm-hmm.
• 20:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was Kurt at the time.
• 20:43
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 20:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: My husband went even on the website yet.
• 20:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: So when he's talking, I'm like, excuse me, I have to get back to orientation.
• 20:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he's like, okay, after orientation, they take me back to my sweet or whatever where he sits, they open the door and I'm like, oh, and this will be, you're surprised, no, I'm like, whoa, Jesus.
• 21:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it's the look on his face was like a year.
• 21:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: Um, the wall.
• 21:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: The wall who you brushed off.
• 21:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm your boss, and I think I tell people because I've made this mistake in the past.
• 21:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's like, oh, I wasn't into my husband when I first met him.
• 21:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it wasn't because I didn't think he was handsome.
• 21:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think my husband is very handsome.
• 21:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: fireman God, but he was not my type.
• 21:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was into guys who were tall.
• 21:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was into guys who were kind of like husky, so to speak.
• 21:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: Guys who were athletic, guys who were loud.
• 21:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, I was in entertainment.
• 21:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: I wanted somebody who was as much of a social butterfly as me.
• 21:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like if I'm working a room, you work in the room.
• 21:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: This is my list, okay, and we saw he didn't hit any those top three days.
• 21:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was like, oh, you nice looking, but You know, and you would say the same thing about me like I would have never picked you out of a line up at a club or in a grocery store like You wouldn't have been who I would have approached so
• 22:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: So, as I said, yeah, I literally said, yeah, perfect.
• 22:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's part of this look good to me.
• 22:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, my goofy self, I'm gonna say what the heck's on my mind.
• 22:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: And now I get an opportunity to see this beautiful couple like really serve each other.
• 22:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: And just as a brother and as a friend, I am so proud.
• 22:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: Just from a distance, of course, I don't get an opportunity to get into the minutiae of what you all do, but just from a distance, I'm so proud of the woman that you become as a wife.
• 22:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, you know, because I know your dad, I know your mom, I know what they built, I know how, you know, your daddy got a real unique upbringing and he love his daughter, I mimic how he loves you with my daughter, because he don't play about you, even uprooted his whole life.
• 22:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: be, you know what has started, and I'm willing to do the same thing, you know, however just in the last few years, you know, you, you say I do, you're having this marital bliss, and then these unique health challenges start.
• 23:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: If you don't mind, can you share a little bit of how the vow and sickness and the health came true for you?
• 23:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: Sure, me and my husband, you know, we kind of talked about just the whole back and forth with dating and we were literally on an off again for two years.
• 23:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: Sometimes because I was doing things that showed that I wasn't quite ready.
• 23:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was doing things that showed that he wasn't quite ready.
• 23:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: And we got to come back to that one of them, you were passing forward.
• 23:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, I start self-souding, you know, different drugs.
• 23:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's just like... Yeah.
• 23:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, but in 2019, I started having symptoms.
• 23:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I hope it's not too graphic, but like having blood in my ear and crazy migraines.
• 23:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it happened once in 2016.
• 24:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: And when I went to the doctor, they were like, oh, yep, you TI.
• 24:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm like, oh, okay, cool.
• 24:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm thinking because y'all have my chart, everything, all my family histories of my chart.
• 24:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: So if there was something else, you would have looked forward.
• 24:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: 2019, the same types of things are happening.
• 24:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: And go to the doctors, and they say,
• 24:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's an appointment.
• 24:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: The doctor says you have a UTI.
• 24:23
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm seeing homeless antibiotics.
• 24:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just hell happen to be on the phone.
• 24:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: My mom is a time.
• 24:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: My mom said, tell them to run a full renal panel on you.
• 24:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: Tell them you need to know your bewing, your creatinine, your GFR.
• 24:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: All of it.
• 24:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: How does mom know?
• 24:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: She's our ins.
• 24:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: My mom grew up.
• 24:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: She's been a nurse for my entire life.
• 24:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: She was a nurse thing when she was pregnant with me.
• 24:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, and so the doctor's like, oh,
• 24:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so he's like, all right, I send you back to the lab.
• 24:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: Wait 30 minutes, go back into his office.
• 24:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: He opens the screen, calls in a nurse, and says, put her in a bus, her kidneys are failing.
• 25:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: And all I could think was, but she was going to send me home.
• 25:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: We're antibiotics.
• 25:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I'm on the way to the hospital and I'm texting in me because at this point this is the season we were together.
• 25:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm like, hey, I need you to meet me at the hospital at a lie.
• 25:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: He's like he's like, he's like, what's going on?
• 25:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: He's like, I'm playing man.
• 25:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: What
• 25:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's been a hospital, you need to come on, okay?
• 25:28
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm playing a planned man with Gory, what's wrong?
• 25:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: He's right, what's wrong?
• 25:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: He ends up coming to the hospital and up having to say the night they run all these tests, and the doctor comes in and he says, you're in stage two, renal failure.
• 25:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said, well, what does that mean?
• 25:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was like, you have polycystic kidney disease.
• 25:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: At this point, both of your kidneys are completely covered in cysts.
• 25:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: He says, we're going to go ahead and refer you to a nephrologist and they'll take it from there.
• 25:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: I immediately just start crying because it's a reddit there in my dad had it.
• 26:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I saw what he went through with it and I look at it and I say, if you don't leave me, like I know we've been back and forth for a little while now, if you are going to leave me, leave me now.
• 26:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't want to have to deal with our back and forth, going into whatever this is.
• 26:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: I need somebody who is going to stand by my side through it.
• 26:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he was like, I got you.
• 26:30
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like, OK.
• 26:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: And literally three, four weeks later, he proposed.
• 26:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, he got you in.
• 26:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: Come on.
• 26:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: He learned.
• 26:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: Then I got you in.
• 26:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: Then we went right into COVID in 2020.
• 26:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: We only had 50 people at our wedding.
• 26:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: You were one of them.
• 26:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes.
• 26:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: And, you know, people were, you know, freaked out about the mask and all the things.
• 26:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because I wore a mask at the end of my wedding.
• 26:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: And they were like, well, why she got them at, and I'm like, people didn't know.
• 26:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like, I was a, you know, compromised.
• 27:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: And we got married in 2020 going into 2021.
• 27:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: I ended up, you know, starting my journey on the transplant list.
• 27:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: So it was just a lot for newlyweds.
• 27:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: So you are a newlyweds, you're on a transplant list.
• 27:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm sure it's a lot of fear going on because, you know, when you start talking about kidneys, like a lot, they don't read the, they don't come back like that.
• 27:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: Now, I mean, I don't believe God can do anything.
• 27:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: You have to do some miracle.
• 27:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: You're like, oh my God, you know, you see it on TV.
• 27:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: Right.
• 27:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: But usually it's like dialysis or it's a slow decline or whatever.
• 27:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: So when you go on through these emotional, when you, in most years, do you look back and say, I could say that better?
• 27:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: I could have been a little bit more gentle with these areas.
• 27:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: What type of person were you when you were waiting on this transplant list?
• 27:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: And like literally, I mean, in all honesty fighting for your life.
• 27:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, I was an unhealed person.
• 27:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was a broken person.
• 27:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think that when you are unhealed and you're broken, you scar people without trying because you feel out of control in your own life.
• 28:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so where you should be able to look at other people and show up for them, it's almost like you make everything about yourself.
• 28:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: And that's the type of person I was.
• 28:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: I felt like if my life was slipping away, then I needed to do as much as possible.
• 28:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's quickly as possible.
• 28:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: I needed to be all of the things that I could before I would be nothing.
• 28:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so, you know, I last out a lot.
• 28:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: I argued a lot.
• 28:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was self-seeking in friendships, unintentionally, a lot.
• 28:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: out of a space of not wanting to be vulnerable and let my guard down.
• 28:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think I'm that type of person in general where it's kind of like, I'm not a complainer.
• 28:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't want to put my burden on anybody, but it's like that's amplified in a broken season.
• 29:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I think I was that kind of person.
• 29:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: How does a husband respond to a woman like that and make her feel comfortable?
• 29:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: What are things that he did is like, kind of when you look back like me, kind of made me feel stupid or is it just like a clash of the Titans?
• 29:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think that, I think both ways, I think one way that he really helped that may have ended up being a clash of the Titans is he made me remain as independent as possible for as long as possible like he would take inventory of not you able to do that you could do this, you know what I mean like we could walk the neighborhood you can make it down the street and back right now like you good like let's do it type of a thing, but then there were also times where.
• 29:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know, I couldn't cook, I couldn't clean, and he would do the things and not complain about it.
• 29:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think that him showing up like that for me, looking back is like, wow, like, you really loved me through that.
• 29:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: I think one of the things that people don't think about when you talk about, you know, failure is how many hormones your kidneys produce or tell your brain to produce as your blood is being processed and it's seeing it doesn't have them.
• 30:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: And for men and women, some of those things
• 30:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I think about like early on in our marriage, there were times where I didn't have a desire to be into me.
• 30:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know what I mean?
• 30:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it was something where we could have an honest conversation about it, but me also be able to say like, hey, like I just
• 30:30
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't got it, you know what I mean?
• 30:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: And work through those things.
• 30:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I feel like had we not been friends first, that wouldn't have been possible.
• 30:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hmm.
• 30:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: So when you look at the boxes, safety, security, soothing, and what's the fourth is?
• 30:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: I forgot what to do with.
• 30:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: It seemed like all of those boxes are checked in there because you all had a season of an opportunity to be friends.
• 30:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: Be friends and serve.
• 30:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: You're not saying him through all foes, these.
• 30:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: a few of I look too many, it's usually like, what about Keisha, I use that to sell hot roses and this and then that meant because I ain't gonna like, I remember you giving me so many things.
• 31:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know what he's saying, somebody.
• 31:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: This is all I'm like, I don't come with nobody's saying that man right there, that man like you, and you like him.
• 31:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: So you're not going to stop pretending in front of me, but I want to be able to like go down in the street a little bit.
• 31:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: You own this transplant list.
• 31:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: Do they call and tell you that they find a kidney?
• 31:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: Because now you have the kidney, but do they call you?
• 31:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: Is it somebody on the outside?
• 31:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like how do you get here?
• 31:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, on the other side of it, or you mean like the process of like, do they call you because I'm only seeing movies.
• 31:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: We got a kidney.
• 31:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: You got to be here in 20 minutes.
• 31:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh my god.
• 31:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: One of like the first your movie is um, yeah, they see their movie.
• 31:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: I think it was a kidney.
• 31:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: They was like, we got a kidney for you.
• 31:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: You got a hairy up and get there.
• 31:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: You got to take a helicopter quickly because you got 24 hours of the kidney going to go to the next course hilarious.
• 31:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, there's a kid in the movie.
• 31:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: Okay.
• 31:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, no.
• 32:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: You build time on the list.
• 32:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: There's a lot of quantifiers, so people's antibodies got them at your blood type, got them at your BMI has to be relatively close.
• 32:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: You have to have like the same vaccines, like there's a lot that goes into it.
• 32:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: But basically, once you get on the list and you have all your information in the system and that's hard enough itself, they do every test that they can do before you get on this list.
• 32:23
  [SPEAKER_07]: You can't have cancer, you can't have had like, they, it runs the gamut.
• 32:28
  [SPEAKER_07]: They're like, we don't wanna waste and work on a person, which I feel like it's so, you know, it hurts a little bit.
• 32:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you might be sick.
• 32:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, if you might finish that anyway, they like, we gonna get into somebody who helped.
• 32:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh my gosh.
• 32:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: That is so mean.
• 32:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: It is, it is.
• 32:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh my God.
• 32:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: But that's how you get on the list.
• 32:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: On the other side of it, most donors are deceased.
• 32:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: And fortunately, they call them cadavers.
• 32:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: So when you're on the list, you're really waiting for somebody to die a car accident, you know somebody to to pathway of natural causes, but maybe their organs are still functioning long enough for them to get it on ice.
• 33:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: cadavers and get it to you.
• 33:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, so when you get a call, it's usually that and you have two hours.
• 33:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: That's what I mean it.
• 33:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: I thought it was like fast.
• 33:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I was like, you got two hours to get here because we got to give it.
• 33:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: It is very fast.
• 33:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, but that wasn't my story.
• 33:23
  [SPEAKER_07]: So what was your story?
• 33:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: I had a live donor.
• 33:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: And who was the live donor?
• 33:27
  [SPEAKER_06]: The live donor ended up being my husband.
• 33:29
  [SPEAKER_06]: In my husband.
• 33:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: Every time.
• 33:39
  [SPEAKER_06]: Oh, what?
• 33:40
  [SPEAKER_06]: Stop, before you make me cry, yeah.
• 33:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, this is my sister brother like I was praying so much.
• 33:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: And boy, when I found out that that boy could give a kid me, who?
• 33:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
• 33:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: It was our husband right now.
• 33:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hold on.
• 33:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: And that was a journey.
• 33:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: It was a journey.
• 33:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: So how did they find out his kidney can work?
• 34:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, cause anybody was playing a guy.
• 34:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: You are healthy.
• 34:05
  [SPEAKER_05]: Yeah.
• 34:06
  [SPEAKER_07]: Is the funny thing is my husband would tell you when I got on the list.
• 34:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: His first response was, test everybody else.
• 34:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm gonna be last.
• 34:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: Just test, test everybody else.
• 34:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: And nobody else could do it.
• 34:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm gonna do it with test everybody else first.
• 34:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so we did, we tested my brother, we tested, you know, friends, cousins, different people trying to to get this kidney.
• 34:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: And we really went into overdrive.
• 34:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: I would say around 2022 because that's when I was right at like 18% functioning.
• 34:46
  [SPEAKER_07]: And once you get to like 10 is when they port your arm.
• 34:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: And they say, we want to prep you so you ready.
• 34:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so not me about the cry, you've got to be really here crying.
• 34:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's me too.
• 35:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm a little kid.
• 35:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: Lord, okay.
• 35:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm about to share something that I've never shared publicly.
• 35:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, and 2023.
• 35:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was the first time that we tested my husband.
• 35:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: He started the process.
• 35:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was getting tested.
• 35:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: And this has to have been around like April May.
• 35:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: And the doctors were calling him back because one thing about being a donor is they talk to you, they don't talk to the person that you're donating to.
• 35:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so my husband, they were saying like, oh, these levels were off this sort of the third right now.
• 35:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: We wouldn't be able to do anything.
• 35:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: We need to run more tests on you.
• 35:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: in May of 2023, I ended up getting pregnant and transplant team, the phrologist, yourologist, everybody was shocked because with my kidney function, it should have physically not been possible for that to happen.
• 36:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so everyone's scrambling like, well, we don't know what to
• 36:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: what the potential outcomes of this could be.
• 36:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: And then you can make a decision.
• 36:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: They said, your kidneys are probably going to kick in and carry you through this pregnancy just because that's what the body's trying to do.
• 36:30
  [SPEAKER_07]: But when you give birth, there's a possibility that we will have to support your chest and do dialysis.
• 36:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: There's a possibility that you could die.
• 36:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: You could lose blood at that point.
• 36:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was literally giving myself shots so that my body could make blood.
• 36:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: And they were saying, this is very dangerous.
• 36:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: We're not gonna tell you not to proceed, but we're gonna tell you what will happen if you do proceed.
• 36:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: Me and my husband's response was, we gonna see for ourselves what that did was it made me completely inactive on the list.
• 37:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because I'm not available.
• 37:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: Did you pray?
• 37:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: Right, so even if you call me, you can't operate on me.
• 37:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: So they made me an active.
• 37:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I go an active and I end up miscarrying the top of September when we're like headed to France on vacation.
• 37:23
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it is like the most traumatizing season of my life.
• 37:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm so angry with God in that moment because it's like, why do I keep getting hit with blows that I never asked for?
• 37:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why am I teaching Bible study and preaching to people and praying for people, and serving in every capacity imaginable and you're not showing up for me.
• 37:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why is this happening?
• 37:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why would you allow me to get pregnant when it was a miracle in the first place?
• 38:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: And then not see it through.
• 38:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: Why would you do that to me?
• 38:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so literally, you know, for those who watched me on social media, probably like September of 2023, till about April of 2024.
• 38:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: Baby, I went everywhere, I could think of going.
• 38:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: I do.
• 38:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: I like, I went to St.
• 38:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: Trope, I went to Paris, I went to Dubai, I went to Mexico, anything that I could think of to do.
• 38:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: I said, I'm going to do it because if I'm an end up on dialysis, then I wouldn't see some stuff.
• 38:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: If I got to be chained to a machine three times a week for who knows how long my dad was on dialysis for 10 years, I want to see everything there is to see and I barely stepped foot into my church during the end of that year.
• 38:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just, I do my hands up.
• 38:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: Well.
• 38:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't even know what the question was.
• 38:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: No, it's perfect.
• 38:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: I think it's a great pause.
• 39:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: because I feel like somebody on the other side of the cameras, things to them, self-girl, that's me.
• 39:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like I've literally done everything that's humanly, and I did all of the spiritual colloquialisms that have been put in place.
• 39:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: I pray, I fast it.
• 39:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: The miracles here, I've been the church.
• 39:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: I tied.
• 39:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: The pastor said that if I do this, this will be protected.
• 39:21
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then God has the final sale of a culture on how he wants to do it.
• 39:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so I totally understand the vendetta and the issue.
• 39:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I believe that you're not the only one.
• 39:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: I always like to make it personal.
• 39:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: There have been times in my life where I'm looking at it.
• 39:34
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, yo, I'm doing the right thing with the wrong thing.
• 39:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: Keep having me.
• 39:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 39:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, you know, I've said it on every guest that I've taken.
• 39:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, it just took me back to James 1, 2, 2, 4.
• 39:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, I'll enjoy it when you face trials on many kinds.
• 39:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, we got to let that perseverance as a perfect work.
• 39:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: So, we don't be lacking anything.
• 39:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: But you don't be want to hear that stuff.
• 39:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's not 90 down.
• 39:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's like, what?
• 39:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: You're going to do me like that.
• 39:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: I could have been, okay.
• 40:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: How do you, what's the defining moment when you say, all right, God, I'm tired, I'm gonna come back.
• 40:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: Um, it wasn't a defining moment.
• 40:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was defining people.
• 40:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: There were people who would not allow me to continue to stray.
• 40:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: One of those people was Pastor Taffy dollar.
• 40:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh, uh, at the top of 2024, you know, we had a conversation about leading the women's ministry.
• 40:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, I ain't even been coming.
• 40:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, but it's a church real good.
• 40:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: You either go on a church real good, not real good.
• 40:40
  [SPEAKER_06]: I'll get scared.
• 40:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: No, real good.
• 40:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: No, real good.
• 40:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: And she had me reach and it was just, it was defining moment for me.
• 40:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: I ended up going to a woman's conference, 2024, March of 2024, another defining person, Dr. Anita Phillips.
• 41:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: I didn't go to half of the sessions because I wasn't feeling good.
• 41:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: At that point, I want to say my kidney function may have been around like 10 and I was to the point where like at five o'clock every day, I went to sleep.
• 41:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like I just had nothing like I had no energy and I ended up coming to this nice session and she picked me out of the audience and she said, I got to send you to clip.
• 41:30
  [SPEAKER_07]: She was like sister sister sister.
• 41:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: And she just started prophesying about how with God said he was going to do.
• 41:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: And the end of her prophecy, she said, every light is gonna be green.
• 41:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: Every light is gonna be green.
• 41:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: And she said, and you don't have to rush, she was like, because when you get to it, it's gonna be green.
• 41:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I left that conference and I went home.
• 42:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think it was the first time because I feel like sometimes when it's hot like, don't question God, don't be angry with God, but it was the first time I went home and I said, Lord, I'm angry at you.
• 42:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: I came to leave you didn't you like that.
• 42:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: I came to leave you been doing me like this for all of these years.
• 42:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't mean engaged twice now.
• 42:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: I married in the marriage I'm in.
• 42:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: I can't even be the wife that I thought I was gonna be because I'm less than this and less than that.
• 42:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm at a shoe, fix it, like what is happening?
• 42:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: Are you who you say you are?
• 42:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: These are the things I'm asking because at this point, I'm angry, but I'm also like, why you had this lady prophesied to me?
• 42:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like, you bother me through this lady.
• 42:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: Right, through lots of people.
• 42:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: Right, because I'm running.
• 42:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: Okay.
• 42:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: And you all sitting people to bring me back.
• 42:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm good on you.
• 42:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: So let's have a conversation.
• 42:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I will never forget, as sure as I'm sitting in this seat right now, in my closet, when I got very honest with God, very honest, I literally heard the voice of God, he said, not by my, not by power, but by my spirit, I will do it.
• 43:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I got it from that place.
• 43:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it's funny because people talk about how some get deluance in an instant and some don't.
• 43:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: You got to kind of walk it out.
• 43:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: That was the one time in my life where I felt it like fall, like all the stuff that I had been angry about, all of the delays and the grief over what I thought would be happening in my life at the time.
• 43:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: Because at that point, my husband, you know, said, I needed to quit my job.
• 43:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I quit my job.
• 43:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I didn't have a title to attach my worth to.
• 43:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: It didn't matter, nothing mattered.
• 43:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it was the first time where I said, God, and even if you don't, who?
• 44:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just want you.
• 44:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: If we could have what we had in this closet where you can sit with me through it, that's enough for me.
• 44:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think it was that mindset shift that really changed the situation.
• 44:16
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I think,
• 44:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: My husband during the time was in this very protective mode where it was like, if you don't want to serve, you don't got to serve.
• 44:27
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you don't want to work, you ain't got to work, whatever you need to do to be healthy for as long as possible, that's what we're going to do.
• 44:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you want to do some work, but any to be something you want to do.
• 44:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know what I mean, and so that's what that season was like.
• 44:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: That was a good season.
• 44:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was a good season.
• 44:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: I like the fact that the scripture weren't true.
• 44:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: That when you kind of enjoy a trials of many times that the end of the scripture of four is says, that you will like nothing.
• 44:57
  [SPEAKER_07]: Nothing.
• 44:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: And what I think I heard you say was in that moment, it was like, then that's matter.
• 45:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: Nothing.
• 45:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm solid.
• 45:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: Everything gonna be good.
• 45:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: I'm solid.
• 45:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: After that is very interesting.
• 45:07
  [SPEAKER_07]: I finally got back active on the list.
• 45:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm gonna let you know right now it's like a little while to get back active like even after you an active day run all the same test day ran.
• 45:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: Are you still got to run it all the way back to the end right in case something didn't happen.
• 45:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't know, but it took a while to get back south to but I got back active and they ended up testing my husband and do you know everything that wouldn't line it up.
• 45:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: or the numbers in the face and the dad, all of a sudden he may sense.
• 45:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: And his selfie fight like, oh, God, I gotta go give you what he's give you.
• 45:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah, he found out before I did.
• 45:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
• 45:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: He found out.
• 45:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: So you get the news and you're like, he like, so they told him first and he has to tell you.
• 45:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: They so him, he took me to dinner.
• 45:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: He recorded this.
• 45:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: I look a mess and say a video, but he took me to dinner, which ain't out of the norm.
• 46:00
  [SPEAKER_07]: He used to go to date nights all the time.
• 46:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: We still do date night all the time.
• 46:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he gave me a card, and I was like, I love a little card.
• 46:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: I love a little card.
• 46:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: I love a little card.
• 46:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's in me somewhere.
• 46:10
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's okay.
• 46:12
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm reading the card.
• 46:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: And then he got a little hand right in his hand right in his heart.
• 46:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: He's a doctor.
• 46:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it's right like a doctor.
• 46:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yeah.
• 46:20
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I'm reading it and he's just talking about how, you know, I love you, no matter what, you know, I know things, you know, my marriage is shifted and this and that and a third, you know, but I want you to know I'm always going to be here and nobody will ever have your back though.
• 46:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: I have your back and nobody loves you.
• 46:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: I love you especially because, you know, I just want to let you know, I was approved to be your donor.
• 46:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I like, I lost it.
• 46:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: We were at night, I lost it.
• 46:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was a weightlifting, but it was also a reminder to me that God is not a man that he would lie.
• 47:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: We were talking earlier about me starting at the church.
• 47:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was coming around to the story about God really showing me that my husband was my husband.
• 47:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I never forget out of fringe and if we prayed is after all of the failed things, I said, I want date no, no, then just no more life.
• 47:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: We're going, we're going to the other side.
• 47:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm a beer.
• 47:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: No, no, no, no, no, no.
• 47:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: I know as you go to the other side, I'm like, you know, maybe somebody from Dubai so you know what I'm saying.
• 47:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know what I'm saying?
• 47:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't really agree.
• 47:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: No disrespect to my brothers in Dubai.
• 47:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: I got over there.
• 47:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: Oh my God, I was just like, I'm gonna be a richoncy.
• 47:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like I don't got to be married.
• 47:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't got to be married.
• 47:42
  [SPEAKER_07]: I don't got to be married.
• 47:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: I didn't uh, I'm done.
• 47:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: I didn't been through the ringer.
• 47:46
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's not for me.
• 47:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: That's where I was at.
• 47:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I remember her.
• 47:49
  [SPEAKER_07]: She said, Is this going to be your dad?
• 47:51
  [SPEAKER_07]: Say you're okay?
• 47:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: Is God for a sign?
• 47:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: If you want a sign, she from DC too.
• 47:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said, where is it?
• 47:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: Is she took we took the word?
• 47:58
  [SPEAKER_07]: Is she was the scripture about if you put the wool out in the wool this way?
• 48:01
  [SPEAKER_07]: It didn't like three times.
• 48:08
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so she said, well, right, don't tell me, don't tell her that I don't want to.
• 48:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes, hi, bitch, but I don't want people to think that it's okay.
• 48:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I went to God.
• 48:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: I wrote in my journal, this pink journal, it got cool safe cheeks and Boston gold on front of it.
• 48:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: But at first, they, I moved here.
• 48:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: It was your movement to a cool stage.
• 48:28
  [SPEAKER_07]: It was.
• 48:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said, Lord, when a man is my husband, I will know because he will bring me some flowers.
• 48:34
  [SPEAKER_07]: He ain't going to send him to me, he ain't going to mail him to me.
• 48:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: Then I can come through pro flowers.
• 48:37
  [SPEAKER_07]: Like he's going to bring me some flowers.
• 48:40
  [SPEAKER_07]: That's how I will know that that's the man you sent to be my husband.
• 48:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: So why do you pick a sunflower flower?
• 48:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.
• 48:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know.
• 48:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: You was like, I, you know, this is not a coincidence.
• 48:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's a, it's a, it's a very light.
• 48:52
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's not a flower.
• 48:53
  [SPEAKER_07]: You're going to go, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a
• 49:03
  [SPEAKER_07]: People just don't be picking up sunflower and they only in a certain season.
• 49:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: So the eye, you wrote a sunflower.
• 49:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: That is so sharp, Dave.
• 49:12
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know you were sabotage yourself, it seemed like it probably.
• 49:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: You're like, you know what, I don't want somebody so bad.
• 49:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm gonna pick the flower that everybody's gonna pick.
• 49:22
  [SPEAKER_07]: Now, and I stood in a kitchen, we prayed over my sign.
• 49:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like the end of 2014, you know, when I'm about my life.
• 49:31
  [SPEAKER_07]: Right before I ended up being moved to the other office when I got promoted, it was assistance day.
• 49:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: As my husband's assistant, correction, two days before assistance day.
• 49:44
  [SPEAKER_07]: Coming to my office, in the way that the office is situated, there's a door and inside of the room, it's my desk, and then inside of the room is another door to another room.
• 49:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Does that make sense?
• 49:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: Yes.
• 49:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: His room is the room behind the door.
• 49:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, so you right here, like, straight to your room.
• 49:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: Secretary, right, then over to my right, it's a conference room.
• 50:03
  [SPEAKER_05]: Okay.
• 50:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I come in and on the ledge of my desk, huge bouquet of sunflowers.
• 50:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: My eye literally twitches.
• 50:15
  [SPEAKER_07]: I peed in the conference room.
• 50:17
  [SPEAKER_07]: He's in a meeting with somebody.
• 50:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I sit at my desk and I literally am just like, who brought these?
• 50:24
  [SPEAKER_07]: And at the time, I started dating somebody.
• 50:26
  [SPEAKER_07]: So I'm like, maybe maybe, because his last name started with the, it was like, maybe, maybe just man to kind of appear and brought me some sunflowers.
• 50:36
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was wrong.
• 50:38
  [SPEAKER_07]: He comes out of the conference room to personally use, I said, hey, who brought me here?
• 50:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: Flowers, he's like, oh, I got him for you for assistant's day, and I said he brought him to you.
• 50:47
  [SPEAKER_07]: He brought him to me.
• 50:48
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said, oh, I said, assistant's day isn't to win today or Thursday.
• 50:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: Whatever was it was two days later.
• 50:55
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he was like, who was on my calendar for today?
• 50:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I said, well, I put the reminder on your calendar for today to remind you to get something for assistance day, which is in two days, because I'm a proactive assistant, you might feel.
• 51:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: He's just like, let's get you out here.
• 51:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: You know, get you ahead of the game.
• 51:13
  [SPEAKER_07]: And his response, I lie to you nights, is, well, I hope they last in the end, because I'm not getting nothing else.
• 51:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
• 51:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: Joe, somebody heard me, somebody read my journal.
• 51:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah.
• 51:32
  [SPEAKER_07]: Ain't no way.
• 51:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: He picked some flowers.
• 51:35
  [SPEAKER_07]: Sitting at that dinner, it all made sense.
• 51:41
  [SPEAKER_07]: It made sense why I couldn't marry my college sweetheart.
• 51:45
  [SPEAKER_07]: It made sense why I couldn't marry a man who checked every single thing on my list.
• 51:50
  [SPEAKER_07]: But the things that potentially mattered to my future.
• 51:59
  [SPEAKER_07]: Hearing my husband say, I am going to give you a gift that is going to keep you alive.
• 52:05
  [SPEAKER_07]: When we got to June of 2024, my dad was saying, let them port your arm.
• 52:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: Let them, because I was at like 8% by then, let them port your arm.
• 52:18
  [SPEAKER_07]: I was like, nah.
• 52:23
  [SPEAKER_07]: No, I'm not gonna let them port my arm.
• 52:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: Weirdly in faith, but not intentionally like I wasn't doing it to be weird and spooky and deep.
• 52:33
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just felt like, no, I ain't got to do that.
• 52:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: So no, I'll bring lights.
• 52:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: I ain't got to do that.
• 52:39
  [SPEAKER_07]: And so when he said it, it was just like, Lord, thank you.
• 52:43
  [SPEAKER_07]: Thank you and not just for showing up for me in this moment, but for showing up for me in 2013 when I wanted to get married and you sat at me and my mama's basement and say, no,
• 52:54
  [SPEAKER_07]: is disengaged him.
• 52:56
  [SPEAKER_07]: It's not the one for when I wanted to marry my college sweetheart because he was in the league.
• 53:02
  [SPEAKER_07]: And he kept cheating and I said, I could change.
• 53:04
  [SPEAKER_07]: I just need to get dirty when he gets dirty and not going to be cheating like this.
• 53:09
  [SPEAKER_07]: No more because he got me dirty.
• 53:11
  [SPEAKER_07]: And I was like, you're worth more than that.
• 53:14
  [SPEAKER_07]: And it's like, in that instant, everything else makes sense.
• 53:19
  [SPEAKER_07]: That did not make sense.
• 53:21
  [SPEAKER_07]: It made me realize God was never keeping something from me.
• 53:25
  [SPEAKER_07]: He was always keeping me for something.
• 53:29
  [SPEAKER_07]: That was where the FMI.
• 53:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hey, wait, quick question.
• 53:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: Are you an organization that really focuses on family, whether there's children, relationships, or even reconciliation and finances for family?
• 53:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: Anything family, if you are an organization who needs to be in front of an audience that actually cares about what you care about, this is that platform.
• 53:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: We love the part in with you.
• 53:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: All you gotta do is click the little email right here or just go to the description in this YouTube and I just believe by faith that we may get an opportunity to partner.
• 53:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: All right, now back to the show.
• 54:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: And that's what I learned in the night.
• 54:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: Man, yeah, make some noise for that real quick.
• 54:04
  [SPEAKER_02]: I want to give a little love in here.
• 54:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh my God.
• 54:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: So, you know, here's the thing.
• 54:12
  [SPEAKER_02]: Um, try that you played the background for so many great people.
• 54:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, it's a beautiful story that many of us know about one of the greatest pastors that will go down the history as a really great guy.
• 54:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: Um, Joe Olste.
• 54:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: Some love him and some feel like, well, he's a motivational speaker.
• 54:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't play about Joel at all.
• 54:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: His book changed my life.
• 54:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: Your best life now, whatever it was, I was in the streets.
• 54:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm being pretty willing.
• 54:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know what made me pick up this smiling book, but I did this and then I got an opportunity to hear a story of being in the background, video typing his father, and you know, editing the videos and having to sit under that type of two to reach for all of those years.
• 54:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then of course, when his father transitioned, of course, he stepped up to the plate and the rest is being history.
• 54:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, you've been a servant to so many amazing people, you know, you know, included myself.
• 55:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: You started on a level that nobody can ever, ever question.
• 55:04
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like once we put it in, yo lat, we know it's done and it's going to be done really, really great.
• 55:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: But I just believe in my heart that God is giving you this story to empower women across the country as well as men.
• 55:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, we got to go ahead and finish those books that you start and you stop.
• 55:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: We got to grab that consistency and know that the type of responsibility that you've taken for so many other people.
• 55:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: And now it's time to take total responsibility for yourself.
• 55:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: I invited you here because I count this as a launch pair.
• 55:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: This is a pair where people get an opportunity to see behind the pretty face.
• 55:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: They get an opportunity to see behind the opportunity.
• 55:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: See this beautiful couple that's gold.
• 55:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: Everybody sees the glory, but nobody knows the story.
• 55:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Now that I hear, I just believe by faith after the book is written, there is
• 55:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: There's movies, there's television as film, just like he made the relationship makes sense.
• 55:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: He's going to make every part of your journey also makes sense.
• 55:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: Why you were bridge with reach media, why you worked in television, why you've done acquisitions, like, got a show sharing me now that you, like, I don't know your personal business, but I know that you probably get influencer deals, maybe like I see a lot of influencer deals, but they're now
• 56:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, your desire for some of the what you did, I guess calls that you did, but it's like another group that you may be a part of or just dragged in because you are here sometime, but I just know that God is going to elevate you and and brand partnerships are going to happen because of the story.
• 56:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, I do see some fun, some fun television stuff, you know, that you may not necessarily want.
• 56:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, um, no disrespect to my other audience, but there's a broad audience of white, black Hispanic that really need to hear your story.
• 56:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, um, you know, get out your own way.
• 56:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's time.
• 56:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, in my know it too, like you picked the right person, he's just pushing enough and loving enough to make sure that you get to where you need to go.
• 56:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm so grateful and thankful and publicly thank you for doing
• 57:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: do doing me and my former wife correctly 11 us both in one of the toughest seasons of our life.
• 57:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you for not isolating me and not speaking to me and thank you for not isolating her, understanding that both parties played a part in the demise and not choosing the side, but choosing the love both until we could get to this place now where, you know, she's living the life I'm living the life.
• 57:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you for always reminding neutral.
• 57:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: Your character has always been so stellar to people around the world.
• 57:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: And now, guys, I'm gonna start sending little shardays, you know?
• 57:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: So don't try to flip it as though I'm serving them.
• 57:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: They're there to serve you.
• 57:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: Like, you tell this one girl they're gonna go.
• 57:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: And it's not, it's not being humble.
• 57:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: You've been through enough.
• 57:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Here's the thing, there are people on stages who make
• 57:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: a lot of money and they make a lot of noise and they are known all across the country.
• 57:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: And when you look at those people, you're probably like, man, my vernacular, I didn't even like that.
• 57:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: I had to try myself to be like that, man, I'm busy.
• 57:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm not, man, I'm busy.
• 58:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: I know my daddy is.
• 58:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: It was a dude who walked up to me and he said, man, you know, one day I'm gonna be on the stage, it's just like you, bro.
• 58:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm telling you, I'm taking your spot, bro.
• 58:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: And he was just joking.
• 58:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I had to be very honest with them.
• 58:12
  [SPEAKER_02]: I said, oh, now's
• 58:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: But my experience, you can't duplicate because if you went through what I went through, you'll be dead by now.
• 58:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: Somebody went through what you went through.
• 58:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: They might not be here, but you are.
• 58:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: So they're not paying you for what you say.
• 58:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: They're paying you for what you overcame, they're paying with you paying for what you don't look like what you've been through.
• 58:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: They're paying for it that you didn't lose your mind.
• 58:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: They're paying because so all this stuff like, well, I just cut no, no, no, like I'm old this.
• 58:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: I am old this.
• 58:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: God put me through hell, so I can set them free.
• 58:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: If you want to see the captive set free, pick me.
• 58:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: because he lived in me on a quivically, I don't die to that all.
• 58:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: When I come, he come and I just believe that you have to prepare your heart to know that, you know, I mean, you know, it's just time.
• 59:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's just time and we'll support you.
• 59:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: There's so many people that are just in the wings to support you.
• 59:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: I ask you to other deaths.
• 59:10
  [SPEAKER_02]: I put me on text message with Emmett because when God gave it to me, I want to be able to give it to both of y'all at three o'clock in the morning, because y'all and you and him.
• 59:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: I said, boarders and boundaries, but it sure is my name is Willie.
• 59:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm here to help prepare what I know God wants to do in your life.
• 59:23
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I don't even know the whole story, but now I know the story.
• 59:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm like, you always write, because this story got to be around the world.
• 59:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm grateful that you will be so safe to share such intimate parts of your life.
• 59:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm sure the audience was blessed by this world.
• 59:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you.
• 59:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you.
• 59:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: Thank you so much.
• 59:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: Family listen, you know how we do it.
• 59:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: When my leg goes like this, you already know what it is.
• 59:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm in there.
• 59:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: But family, here's the thing.
• 59:45
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know necessarily what you're going through right now, but I do know that everybody's going through something.
• 59:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: And we're all in different parts of our life.
• 59:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: If I can be honest with you with a smile on my face, before this interview, I got a call.
• 1:00:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: And my grandma just died like 50-cell minutes.
• 1:00:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hi, Bob, you know, I don't have, I make no big saying about it.
• 1:00:11
  [SPEAKER_02]: I just took the news.
• 1:00:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, um,
• 1:00:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I just said, you know what, God, you're a good God.
• 1:00:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm going to go do what I'm called to do.
• 1:00:23
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm not saying that to receive sympathy or take anything from the story that we just heard.
• 1:00:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: But I want to let you know that you get no excuse to not do what you're called to do.
• 1:00:34
  [SPEAKER_02]: You have no excuse for not persevering through what God allows.
• 1:00:39
  [SPEAKER_02]: He says, listen, count it all joy when you face trials of many kind.
• 1:00:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: When you get an opportunity to see a person like Sharday come out on the other side.
• 1:00:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: You get an opportunity to see like, oh my God, there's always a select it in.
• 1:00:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: And once you go through these different trials so much, you know that he's maturing you, teach you how to persevere, and so you can be maturing every area of your life.
• 1:01:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: So here's the thing.
• 1:01:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't know what you're going through right now, but I do know that he has a selected end and his victory.
• 1:01:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: And if it listen, if it don't feel like the win right now, like you win it, maybe it's not the end, because he don't never end on a loss.
• 1:01:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: So even today as I navigate through some very unique feelings, I got to leave here and I got to make sure the family's cool, because of course I'm like the matriarch I can't, you know, a patriarchy excuse me of the family.
• 1:01:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm like, what am I in it?
• 1:01:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: What do I need in this moment?
• 1:01:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: And that was the time when I didn't love myself enough to know that I need to know what I need.
• 1:01:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: You looking at a woman who knew exactly what she needed and she chose what she needed over what she wanted.
• 1:01:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: Cause what I wanna do is go save everybody in my family.
• 1:01:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: But I'm mature enough to know that I gotta make sure that I put my mask on first before I try to save somebody else.
• 1:01:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: So I want you to learn yourself so much.
• 1:01:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: That's why I do this show.
• 1:01:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's not for hits, it's not for likes, it's not to be sane, it's purity of heart.
• 1:02:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: That maybe you'll hear a conversation that can prick your heart and change to trajectory of your life forever.
• 1:02:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: I told God, I said, man, if you give me a platform, I'll make sure that my modal state pure so you can continuously breathe on it.
• 1:02:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: He's breathing on it.
• 1:02:15
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm listening, he's sending the right people.
• 1:02:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: And as I continue to learn to love myself more through these conversations,
• 1:02:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: My prayers that you get the opportunity to love yourself just as much, or even more, because you might be tall in your legs, don't swing, come on, stuff like that.
• 1:02:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: Because I believe by faith that this conversation is, as God showed me, this is a runaway, a runaway to a flight, and it was a very long runaway to get here, that's because she not doing the private plane baby.
• 1:02:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: She'll bore a 747.
• 1:02:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: Alright, make sure you subscribe and love yourself more.
• 1:02:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: Glad I'm.
• 1:02:49
  [SPEAKER_00]: Love you, my love you, my love you, my love you, my love you, my love you,