Latest / The Steve & Jeff Show / S3 E3 - Positive Campaigning, Pt 2

Transcript

S3 E3 - Positive Campaigning, Pt 2 · The Steve & Jeff Show

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome to the Steven Jeff Show, the funniest podcast ever.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_01: Hey people, I don't write the words, I just read them.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_01: Be sure and follow or subscribe to the Steve and Jeff Show wherever you listen to podcasts.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_01: Write us a review while you're there too.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_01: And now, here's Steve and Jeff.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_02: Hey, thank you, Johnny and Jeff.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_02: Isn't it great to be back here at Eccentric Ladyland Studios doing the show again, doing what we naturally do, doing what we do best.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: How's it going, Steve?
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god, I'm habits are hard to break.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I was gonna say that, but then I forgot.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, Johnny kind of distracted me.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_02: I was gonna say, how's it going?
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: But I know this is so hard.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: You know, I think that probably in year 30 or 31, I'll I'll probably be able to fix this and do it.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_02: Does take some practice, it it's it's a learned skill, and some skills come fast, some skills come very slowly.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_02: So yeah, I don't sweat it.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_02: You know, this is so exciting, Jeff, because you know we're intrepid journalists here, and we are gonna go part two on positive campaigning because you know there's been so much negative, just turning a positive, saying positive things.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_02: I'm excited for tonight, Jeff.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Me too.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: I really felt good about uh the list that we have put together.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I feel like we're very fair with Kamala, you know, a little hard on her in some ways, but that was only an A minus.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_02: That was an A minus in differential equations, you know, you know that, right?
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: And I still have a problem with all those jobs that she had.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: But having said all that, it should be an exciting next week for the election.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: Speaking of that, I don't know if you've been following the election as far as the campaigning, but there's a lot of creative stuff going on.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_00: I know that Trump just did yeah, Madison Square Garden, which is yeah, you know, like a big deal.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, they haven't had crowds like that since well.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: So since 1939.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_02: 1939 was the last time they had a crowd exactly like that.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: And they're using all other kinds of ways to kind of connect with people.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: Did you see Trump was at uh a McDonald's?
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I did.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, which is interesting.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_02: Because they they typically don't hire you know people that are awaiting sentencing.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_02: That was kind of interesting, but yeah, no, he was there, he was there, he pulled out cooked fries and and handed them to a campaign worker.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it was it was exciting.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, it would have been a little more exciting if the McDonald's was actually open in the right and he actually cooked the fries.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: But but there are some other interesting things that the candidates are doing, specifically Trump, who I think is really trying to reach out to people uh in a different way, although I think the Madison Square Garden felt similar.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_02: That was different in a lot of ways, you know.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_02: Well, in some ways, it was yeah, different from what one might you know expect.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_00: Well, right, that because they were Puerto Ricans that they were talking about, right?
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: So that's different because Trump doesn't always he doesn't always talk about Puerto Rican.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_02: Well, it's usually Mexican, so hey, you know, this is a nice change of pace.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's equal time, you know.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, uh, you know.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_00: I did see that Trump, I think it was right after he did the thing in New York, I think he went to Pittsburgh where I was born.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and that he met with a bunch of ninth graders.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_00: Kids are so cute, they're really warm and fuzzy.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_02: And well, and I bet I bet he told the teacher, he said, Hey, I'm gonna be dating her in five years.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: And then he probably got a lot of them to sit on his lap, I bet.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: Only the blonde ones.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, right.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_02: And uh of course, because the others were probably from shithole countries, yeah.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_02: So that's right.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_02: We we don't we yeah, right.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: But he but I think he connected with them on a level, on an equal level, on a level playing field.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: You know, ninth grade is kind of his sweet spot, is as far as you know how he relates to people, I think.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_02: I would have thought it was more like fourth, but you know, okay, maybe ninth.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: Who knows?
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_00: You know, could be.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: But anyways, I was watching what he did.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: It was just fascinating.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Would you like to hear a little bit about I I would, yes.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: Please tell me maybe Kamala's listening.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe this is something that she will try, you know, in the few days.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: So Trump was in this class with a bunch of students, and he gives them a quiz and he says, Can somebody define, give me the definition of the word tragedy?
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: And then he said, Can you put it in a sentence?
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_02: Instructing, helping people learn.
• 4:25
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: That's right.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then one brave blonde girl, blonde, of course, raises her.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: We only call it on the blondes, I'm sorry.
• 4:32
  SPEAKER_02: Only only blondes.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, right.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: She says, if a school bus is carrying 20 people and it drives off of a cliff and everyone is killed, then that would be a tragedy.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: And Trump said, No, no, it's not.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, really?
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: We're close, but it's not a tragedy.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's what we would call a great loss.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_02: Seems like a technicality, but and not to go all SI Hayakawa on you, but I didn't know he was like a semanticist.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, he's like, he's got the best words.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_02: He does, yeah.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: You know, so uh so a few seconds later, a boy raises his hand.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, he was blonde too, German background.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, uh he raises his hand, you know, kind of straight out and says, What about if my friend was at a farm and the farmer drove over him with a tractor?
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Would that be a tragedy?
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: And Trump said, Nope, that's not a tragedy either.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we would call an accident, not a tragedy.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_02: Uh-huh.
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_00: And he said, anybody else?
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: And the entire class was kind of stumped, you know, for a while.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then finally, this boy in the back of the room raises his hand and he says, I know what a tragedy would be.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: If Donald Trump was flying in a private jet and got hit by a missile, that would definitely be a tragedy.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: And Trump says, Exactly.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: And he was very pleased.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: And he says, Now, can you tell the class why exactly that would be a tragedy?
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: And the boy said, Well, it definitely wouldn't be a great loss.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: And it probably wouldn't be an accident either.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_02: Well, there you go.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_02: There you go.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_02: Smart kid.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_02: With kids that smart, I think our future is assured.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we just are going to have smart kids growing up and and you know, working and paying for our social security.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_02: So that's that's really good.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: I think we should dive right in, Jeff.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_02: And as intrepid journalists, we're not just limited to asking questions the New York Times would ask, like, hey, wasn't that really an A-?
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we can expand and we can actually ask questions that the Washington Post would ask, or even that guy, Jeff, you know, the the billionaire Jeff over there, not you, Jeff.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_02: You're not the billionaire, the the other Jeff, the gutless one.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_02: We can ask questions.
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_02: We can treat journalistic topics with the seriousness and the care for America that he has shown.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's the only way to go, Jeff.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_02: So should we should we dive right in?
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: Let's do it.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_02: First positive thing that we want to say is Trump is very persuasive.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_02: He has persuaded millions of people that he's a billionaire when he's really he's really a faux billionaire.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_02: You know, faux billionaires, I see a lot of people don't know about faux billionaires, like faux jerry, right?
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_02: Your your your faux dad.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_02: Faux billionaires, they're like billionaires, but they don't have you know a billion dollars.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_02: So that's the distinction.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_02: They're like that, but they're not.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_02: And see, the nice thing is, unlike real billionaires, like that gutless Jeff guy, who actually is a billionaire, faux billionaires talk people into treating them like they have money, and then they brand a bunch of products that really are not that good and are overpriced, you know, things like uh watches, stakes, fake colleges.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: You know, sounds like our man.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and and you know, not everybody can pull that off.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: That's a hard act.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_00: He's good at that, you know, and the other people they're faux faux minimum wage earners, right?
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: But being a faux billionaire, that's it.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_02: Faux billionaire is hard.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_02: That's I mean, I knew a guy that you know pretended like he was Russian, but he was he was no more Russian than you know the camera I'm looking at right now.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: You know, so he was faux Russian.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_02: Now that you know you can pull that off, but see, he got caught.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_02: Faux billionaire, that's kind of hard.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_02: I agree.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_00: What else you you have on another?
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, got a whole log list of things.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, good.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_02: Second, he is going to be the best for immigration that anyone has ever been in this country in the history of America.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_02: You know, not everybody would say that, but think about this.
• 8:43
  SPEAKER_02: Two of his three wives were from Eastern Europe.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_02: One of them, we're pretty sure, came here illegal.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it's interesting because most of Eastern Europe's immigrants came to escape Hitler.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_02: But I guess there were some that came to the U.S.
• 8:58
  SPEAKER_02: to escape the guys that were chasing Hitler, right?
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, yes.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_02: I think there are some that are on that side.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_02: And he's also kind of an interesting pattern.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_02: Likes to marry women whose name ends in A.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_02: He's got Havana, he's got Marla, he's got Melania.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_02: And does Melania sound like a skin disease or something?
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, that sounds like a condition.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: And isn't his daughter?
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: It also ends in a, doesn't it?
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, Avanka.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: Avanka.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: I would not think that a would be his favorite letter.
• 9:25
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, what would you what would you think?
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: I mean double D or Double D, yeah.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_02: I could see that.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: Two D's, maybe, but but see that.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, I can't argue with you there.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you know, if anybody knows anything about immigrants, should be somebody that's married a couple.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, exactly.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_02: Next one, Jeff.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_02: Trump really treats everyone the same.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know, so many people treat some people differently, you know, some better, some worse.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_02: He really treats everybody the same for the most part.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_02: He really is like horrible to them, to all of them.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_02: Oh equally.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_02: So it's it's equal opportunity, right?
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_02: He's not favoring what now.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_02: There are a couple of exceptions.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_02: He treats everyone poorly except maybe some of those double Ds.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_02: The well-endowed blondes, you know, they go to the front of line.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_02: And Miriam Adelson, she goes to the front of line too, lots of money, writes the checks, you know.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_02: So there are a couple of exceptions, but in general, he's just equally miserable to everybody.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's just really refreshing.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: I think so.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of like you hit your thumb with a hammer over and over again, and it feels so good when you stop.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of like when I I would imagine when Joe Biden became president, everybody felt so much better because they weren't treated so poorly.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I know my thumb felt notably better.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_02: I'll tell you, felt a lot better.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, number four, you think about it, he has really studied the great leaders of history.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you think about it, he's modeled himself after some of those great leaders.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_02: Kim Jong un, that guy in China, and of course Putin.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_02: Lest I forget Putin.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: It even goes back many years, right?
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, there have been some of the great leaders.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_00: I know that he studied some of them, you know, that came from Germany and Italy, and would it be uh Norway?
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: Even if you were way back.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_02: No, yeah, he keeps he wants immigrants from Norway.
• 11:18
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, interesting that he has never, to my knowledge, he has never studied or idolized the imperial Japanese rulers.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_02: I wonder if there's something going on there.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_02: I hate to cast shade, but maybe there's something going on there.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_00: I I don't know.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_00: And he certainly does a great job of modeling himself after them.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_00: You know, oh absolutely that yes.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_02: He's learned the lesson so well, he's really internalized it.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_02: That's what you hope for with any any study, is that you learn it so well, it just becomes natural to you.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_02: I think he's there, I think he's done it.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_00: Me check.
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: So uh what's number five?
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_02: Everybody says he's a liar.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: If you listen to more than a couple of minutes of a talk, you'll hear a few lies, right?
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_02: But think about this.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_02: What if he's really honest?
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_02: Because you know, actually, he has never failed a lie detector test.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_02: He never took one, but he has never failed a lie detector test.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_02: Someone asked him this actually.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_02: I think it was Bezos, that guy with the Washington Post, who, you know, when he was when he got done licking the boots, he got up and said, Hey, by the way, why haven't you ever taken a lie detector test?
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_02: Turns out he hasn't taken a lie detector test because you'll never you'll never guess who makes lie detecting machines.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_02: Oh boy.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_02: Obama?
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_02: Uh you're close.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_02: Dominion voting.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, yeah.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_02: He's not gonna be able to do that.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: Don't want to get into a lawsuit on this.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: I would probably need to stay away from that.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_02: Because that settlement, the settlement with with that faux news company, that was almost real billionaire money, not faux.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_02: It was darn close to real, you gotta be a real billionaire for that.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: And even if he had taken those tests, I I know that those tests are not very accurate.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_00: Steve, you and I talked about IQ tests, and I think they're based on the same premise.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm sure if he took a lie detector test, it would come out that he was probably like the smartest guy ever.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, absolutely.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_02: If lie detector tests really are kind of modeled on IQ tests, if he took one, I'm sure it would come out a completely straight line.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_02: No wave at all.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_02: I think you're right.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: Number six, he knows how to multitask.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_02: It's hard to be a faux billionaire.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_02: Because think about it, you have to make up stuff every second of the day.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_02: You're pretending, you're acting, you're performing every second of the day.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_00: Now, rich people, they tend to lose their families, their their marriages, right?
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: Because they're just completely consumed.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: I guess being a faux billionaire gives you a little more time since you really, you know, don't have any money.
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, well, no, it actually takes more work because you got to pretend you've got the money.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_02: If you already got the money, you already got that part done.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_02: But you gotta you gotta pretend.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_02: Now, he not only was able to do that for decades, decades, but he also still had time to commit 34 felonies and get convicted of 34 felonies.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_02: Jeff, that's a multitasker if I've ever heard of one.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_00: Nobody's ever committed as many felonies.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_00: People say nobody's ever committed as many felonies as Donald Trump did.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: Everyone's talking about it.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_02: And these were the best felonies.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_02: These were the best felonies anyone in New York State has ever committed.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_02: And not to mention, he also found time somewhere in there to get all those sexual harassment and sexual assault claims.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: I mean that's not easy to do.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_02: And commit fraud.
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_02: Guy must be busy every second.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_02: Wow, no wonder he doesn't sleep.
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_02: I thought it was the adder all he's snorting, but yeah, maybe he doesn't sleep because he's you know, he's got other all this stuff to do, you know.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe that's it.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I'm impressed.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_02: Number seven, he knows the right pace for government.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: That's important.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_02: It's been eight years and it his tax audits aren't done yet.
• 14:58
  SPEAKER_02: Oh he likes that he knows things should move slowly.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_02: It took four years to bring up January 6th, you know?
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, so we're working on that now.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_02: And he's been waiting for Mexico to send that check for the two miles, two miles, Jeff.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_02: Two miles of fence.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_02: They said he wouldn't build a fence, but he built two miles of fence.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_02: Now Mexico hasn't paid yet, of course, but he's patient, he's waiting.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: Well, and I know how that is because we had a storm here the other this was about six months ago, and we had a new fencing put in.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: We had more fence than he had put in in Mexico, but it took forever to get done.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: I can understand how it would take a long time to do that.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_02: Another thing that he does very slowly, and he kind of drags it out and does it slowly, more artistically, is you know, once somebody does that work, then he takes years to pay him, if at all, right?
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_02: So I mean there's there's that, you know.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_02: Number eight, having him as president is going to make again, I should say, is going to make Americans really, really appreciate when a smart, honest, and competent president gets into office again.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: Is this kind of a cousin to banging your thumb with a hammer and then stopping to bang it, and then all of a sudden you have a sense of it's probably like a probably like a half sibling.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_02: It's better than a cousin.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_02: Not quite a full sibling, yeah, not that good, but it's a little better better than a cousin, I would say.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: Probably not always that way, though, that you're automatically going to feel better.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_02: No, I could think of at least one guy who could be president and I would not feel better.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, something to do with elegies and couches and uh Maybelline Eyeliner.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think we would all feel better if he was the the next president after that.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_02: You know, Jeff, back in the 70s, I had a girlfriend in high school who would have loved to get her eyes to look like his.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, she worked hours on those things and just could never get them to look quite that good.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: Well, and I I don't even know whether this is even a valid point here because I'm not sure we're gonna have elections again.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: Uh well, yeah, you know, so they that this may be the last election anyway.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_02: And see, there you go.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_02: See, he's he's saving elections are expensive, elections take time.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_02: He's saving everyone time and money.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_00: He sounds great to me.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 17:20
  SPEAKER_00: You know, if I didn't know what he was like as president, I would be impressed.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_02: I think I got one more here.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: Number nine.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_02: He is going to be the greatest president for women in the history of the world.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_00: A little hard to believe.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_00: Well, think about this.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_02: Think about this.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_02: The world is full of stress and anxiety and and decisions to make and work and things like that.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_02: If he gets his way, hey, women won't have to worry about any of it.
• 17:46
  SPEAKER_02: They won't have to think.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_02: They'll just do what they're told.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_02: Won't have to think, won't have to work, won't have to do anything.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it sounds like they're like on vacation permanently.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_02: Pretty much.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_00: Uh they're mentally leave, maybe.
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_02: Mentally on well, they will be on maternity leave permanently too, I think.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_02: That's that's probably true.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_00: Because they'll have a lot of babies in the future, right?
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_02: I think he's actually floated the idea of changing the name of the United States to Gilead.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_02: I th I think that's gonna happen.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_00: Well, that's impressive, and I'm sure that all the women out there are gonna be uh voting for him just for that reason that they're that you know he's taking away all that stress of having to decide what you do with your life and your body and your job and yeah, people that are so stressed and like, hey, here's the end of the stress.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_00: I think that makes complete sense.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know, though, Jeff, we are funny guys.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_02: We do a comedy podcast.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_02: But I think at certain times they're just things that aren't funny.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I think the last couple episodes we did.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_02: Well, more than that, but I digress.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_02: But there are times I think we have to step out of these comedy characters and just really address something that is serious, and that if people don't do the right thing, it's not gonna be good.
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_02: This might not be a great argument, but it could be a world where shows like this can't exist.
• 19:07
  SPEAKER_02: Now, a lot of people might like that, but Jeff, the millions, the millions that are listening, they would like it.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_02: But with the election so close and so important, so pivotal to our future and everybody's future of the country, future of kids and everything, I I think we have to take a few minutes and not be funny and just be serious.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: I've really enjoyed doing the podcast.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: I love the characters that we play in the podcast.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: But as we get down to the finish line here, I think it is time to pause and really just tell our audience what we really think.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because I've been very concerned about this election, as I know you are.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I did want an opportunity to talk to people without trying to be cute because it's really not cute.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_02: No, no, it's not at all.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe you like to start things off here.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: I've been involved as a voter in many elections in my lifetime.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: Going back as far as I can remember, you know, it um I'm trying to think the first election I voted in might have been Nixon, maybe.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_00: And then after that, I voted every single every four years.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because it really was important to me.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_00: And over that time, there were really three criteria, three categories that I used to make my decision on who to vote for.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I just want to kind of go over those three points because please do because that's where I feel like everything's falling apart now.
• 20:36
  SPEAKER_00: The first thing that I would look for as to who would be my president would be that they would inspire me, that they represented the values that I have, that I could look up to them, that they were a great person, that the whole world would look at them and wish that their president was as good as the president that we had.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: And that was something growing up where you always looked at the president as kind of the best of us.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_02: And an example or an inspiration to us.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: For me, the last time that happened, and it's been fairly rare where I have felt that way, yeah, was with uh Barack Obama.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_00: I felt like he was that inspirational person that I was so proud of.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_00: He went through so many personal attacks, um, you know, breaking through the color barrier to be president.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: I have so much respect for him.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: I, you know, I look at him as sort of the Jackie Robinson of politics.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_02: Well, yeah.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, in a lot of ways, he is.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: That was the thing, that's the ideal thing.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: If I could find somebody to vote for that was like that.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_00: The second one was to vote for a Democrat.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, we we have sort of towed the line as far as we're not Republicans or not Democrats.
• 21:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I am open, but it is important that my values match the party that I vote for.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that at the end of the day, the Democratic Party probably does that more for me than the Republicans.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Republicans, not that there aren't exceptions to that.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: I think John McCain would have been a very good president.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_00: And in some ways, Ronald Reagan was a good president, you know, because he represented on the first criteria, he represented this image that everyone could look up to.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, it wasn't inspirational.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: Inspirational, very positive.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: But the Democratic Party, for the most part, is aligned with things that I care about.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: And that was important to me.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: So that would be the second criteria.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: The third criteria was really my fear of voting for the other guy.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: And historically, I haven't had to make that decision.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: I have never been scared or fearful of a Republican in the White House until Donald Trump.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: Until now.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I would like to think that my anxiety is based on some left-wing propaganda campaign or Antifa or Black Lives Matter, but it's none of that.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_02: If only they were that organized, yes.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: If they were.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: If it was real, I could do something about it.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_00: But at the end of the day, it was really just about Donald Trump.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: It was about how he was during his first time around.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_00: What he wanted to do during his first time around, but wasn't able to do it.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_00: And what he is promising to do this time around.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's where I wake up in the middle of the night screaming and wonder what could possibly happen.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I think of unlike his first four years, he's he'll be in so much of a better position to do what he wants to do.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: And he'll be able to put everybody in the White House that supports him.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_00: There'll be MAGA people all over the place.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: There's a chance that Congress will be Republican with the Senate and the House.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: And he already has the Supreme Court from stacking it when he was there before.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_00: So those are concerns to me.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: And if I wanted to tell you an example of that that really scares me, I go with their eating dogs in Springfield, Ohio, where where him in Vance promoted a lie that did a lot of damage.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: But what really bothered me was I was thinking if he became president and had all that power, would he go back to a place like Springfield and use that to do the kind of damage that would literally ruin thousands and thousands of people's lives?
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the power that he would have.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's what really scares me more than anything else.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_02: You hit on a great point there with what he has said he's going to do.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we joke about the New York Times, and they they could have shown maybe a little more journalistic integrity up until the last few days have been pretty good.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_02: But before that, they they maybe could have been a little better.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_02: But they had an editorial that listed out some of the things like hey, he wants mass deportations, he wants tariffs are gonna talk about inflation.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, inflation will look good compared to what how much that's gonna raise prices.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_02: And they said, you know, when he says this, believe him.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_02: You know, he's not kidding.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: And and that's the rare part, right?
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, you you didn't know what Bush was gonna do when he became president, you didn't know about Iraq and all that, but yeah, he's telling you.
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: But for me, the good news is that we do have a candidate that we can feel proud of because I think that Kamala Harris is exactly the person that we need at this point.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: For that reason, I'm gonna vote for her.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: What about you, Steve?
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_02: For me, it comes down to also three issues and kind of a more uh like a personal conclusion.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, the three issues.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_02: Number one, I uh talking about the president.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_02: Do we want a president who has decades, a decades-long record of committing fraud, documented, adjudicated, fraud?
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_02: Guy's a fraudster, okay?
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_02: Number one.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_02: I I don't think we should have a president of the United States that is a career fraudster.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_02: Number two.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I can't think of anybody that has ever run this country that has been as dirty and corrupt as he has been, and can't even imagine what he'll be on the next round.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, people always talk about Nixon.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, Nixon, Nixon was a decent guy compared to this guy.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, please.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_02: You know, this is not even close.
• 26:01
  SPEAKER_02: Second reason, uh, right up there with fraud, crimes.
• 26:04
  SPEAKER_02: Do we want a president that is a convicted felon?
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_02: And no, my MAGA friends, this is not a political witch hunt.
• 26:11
  SPEAKER_02: He committed crimes.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_02: He broke state law, he broke federal law.
• 26:14
  SPEAKER_02: He's on trial for federal law now.
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_02: He's been convicted of the state laws.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_02: Felonies.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_02: 34 felony convictions, Jeff.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, come on, there's that.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_02: And number three, temperament.
• 26:25
  unknown: Yeah.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_02: What kind of president do you want?
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_02: You know, do you want a president that is gonna snort at or all on the toilet at three in the morning and mean tweet?
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, is that is that what we are as a country?
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_02: I don't I hope not.
• 26:37
  SPEAKER_02: I don't think so.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_02: And you know, I'm Jeff, you're talking about politics in years back.
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_02: Back in the 90s, I was active in Republican politics.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_02: Back in the 90s, I actually was.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_02: And Bill Clinton was president back then, and most Republicans were saying, well, that he lacked certain aspects of character, which, you know, good argument.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_02: Good some good points.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_02: They formed a group called Character Counts that talked about how the most important thing you want to look for in a president is character.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_02: Issues change, positions change, politics is give and take, a lot of horse trading, but character is really what defines it in the long run.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_02: And you know what happened to the Republicans?
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_02: My Republican friends, where'd you go?
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_02: That used to be you.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_02: That's not you anymore.
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_02: If you're following this guy, that is not you.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_02: And finally, Jeff, we're just about to get kicked out of here of eccentric Lady Land Studios.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_02: But hi, Jeff, and I'm I'm sure you probably have relatives like this as well.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_02: But I had a lot of relatives that were in Europe that were killed by totalitarians on on a couple of sides, actually.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_02: But I and I had two uncles who fought fascism in World War II.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_02: One of them was killed fighting fascism, in fact.
• 27:53
  SPEAKER_02: The other one came back, and I knew him as a kid.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_02: If I vote for somebody who wants to do exactly what they were fighting against, they're gonna come back from the dead and kick my ass.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_02: And then they're gonna say to me, Okay, you know what we did to fight fascism.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_02: What do you do?
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_02: What have you done?
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_02: And I would ask everybody, what are you doing to preserve American freedom?
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_02: It's on the line, guys.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_02: It really is.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_00: This is about freedom.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: This is not a cliche, this is not a spin, a Kamala Harris spin.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_00: This is about protecting what we have.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_00: And it's about him taking it away.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_02: If people want to preserve what we have built in this country, vote.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: All right, everybody vote.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.