Latest / The Shift Podcast / 110. Through My Daughter’s Eyes: Life with a Flight Nurse Mom

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110. Through My Daughter’s Eyes: Life with a Flight Nurse Mom · The Shift Podcast

0:00
Welcome to Frontline Static, we will get to hear interviews with
0:02
some of my clients journeys of getting into flight and how they
0:05
utilize coaching to help them create success of getting hired
0:08
with less confusion and more ease.
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Make your dream a reality of getting into flight.
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Listen in as you hear some of the stories of the people
0:14
getting there and come join the flight prep group.
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OK, welcome to episode 110 of Frontline Static.
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Today I have a really interesting podcast episode for
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you. Usually on the podcast, I'm
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either interviewing people who have helped get into flight or
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I'm talking about concepts or mindset pieces that have been
0:33
key strategies of getting into flight nursing or flight
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paramedicine. But this week I decided to go a
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little bit different to a different route.
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I have with me my daughter today and we're just going to
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interview her and ask her what her take is on having a mom who
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was a previous flight nurse and worked EMS and in healthcare.
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This is a common question that I get from a lot of you guys is
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how does this affect you as being a parent or a mom or
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having children? So let's dive into it at 1st.
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I'm going to have her introduce herself, so let's start.
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There. Hi, my name is Emily and.
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What else? Tell us about yourself, Emily.
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I do swim. I'm on the swim team at Redwood.
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I'm going to be a junior or a senior this year.
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Yeah, I have a twin brother and I live with all brothers, so I'm
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the only girl in the family and I don't know our families.
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Our family's very close. We have a very good bond with
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each other. OK, so I guess I need to back up
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a little bit because for those of you guys who don't know my
1:42
family dynamics, I have a son who is 19.
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He is currently serving a mission in Brazil and speaking
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Portuguese. I have twins that are 17.
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They're going into their senior year, but she already forgot.
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She said she's going into her junior year.
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So they're going to be seen years.
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And then I have a 12 year old who's going to be going into 7th
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grade. And then I am coming up on my, I
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always have to ask my husband about 21st anniversary of being
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married. So that's a little bit of a
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background. So let's just start out and, and
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dive in. I, I, I thought this would be
2:20
interesting for two reasons. One, I get a lot of questions on
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what it's like to be a parent and work in healthcare and work
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long shifts and be a flight nurse.
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And then two, the other thing that I get a lot is I forgot
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what number 2 was. It won't come to me, so let's
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just dive right in. The second thing that I wanted
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to do this for is I feel like sometimes you guys don't,
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especially those who haven't been with me live or have had
2:54
conversations with me. This is just a good way for you
2:56
guys to get to know me a little bit better.
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So let's just start with asking questions.
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What was it like for we had to like, do the math about what
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year it was 'cause I started out as a flight nurse in 2016.
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So what was it like for you? How old were you and what was it
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like for you for me to be gone and work long shifts and hours?
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I was 8 and you, you worked flight nursing until I was 1315.
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It was interesting because you well before you worked as an RN
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and so you didn't have, I mean, you didn't work 24 hour shifts.
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So it was definitely really weird to not have you around.
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But also like art. I mean, that was like most of my
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childhood is that like you just went around a ton And that, I
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mean, I mean, our family had always been close and like my
3:45
dad was always here to like be with us, but it was like
3:48
different, like picking up after each other.
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Like it wasn't. It was mostly my older brother
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keeping us in check because I mean, he was what, 10 years old
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and he had to do it himself. And you know, my dad also worked
3:58
a nine to five. So it was like most of the time
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we were either at school or grandparents were watching us or
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whatever it was. I just remember a lot of nights
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like babysitters when you're working 24 hours.
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I feel like it was kind of like a disconnection in a way because
4:15
like you weren't being, you weren't there to like be able to
4:18
like be around us a ton. And that was fine.
4:20
Like it wasn't anything that was like different growing up.
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Like I know there are a lot of people who have parents who work
4:27
all the time that like kids aren't around them.
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But I feel like I definitely noticed the difference.
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Like when you came back from not doing flight nursing anymore, it
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was different because you were able to be there for us, like in
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high school especially. And so I think it was fine.
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Like when we were kids, it was definitely like, Oh yeah, mom's
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gone this day, whatever we'll pick up after ourselves.
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That's fine. And then you were back the next
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day. So it wasn't like too weird.
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But like being older, like being in high school, it definitely
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would have been different to have you working 24 hours and
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not being at our sports games or our events or award ceremonies
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or anything. So I feel like their final scene
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job is super cool. And I think you you loved doing
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it. And I think you're a very
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organized person. But I think growing up in that
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way was totally fine. I just feel like being older and
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now looking back at it, it's like being older.
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I want you to be at all these things with me.
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So it's just like, yeah, it's just clearly different from like
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being a kid to like growing up and then being in middle school
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or high school and like wanting you to come through all our
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events. And then also COVID too, as
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well. Like that kind of threw
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everybody off. And so you were gone.
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I feel like a lot more during COVID time, but it was fine
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because like we weren't really doing anything.
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Like you weren't really missing out on anything.
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So yeah, I think being a kid, it was different.
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It was, it was fine that you were gone.
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And you know, our my dad was around the whole time and I had
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siblings that were taking care of me and cousins and family.
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But I feel like being older, it obviously is a lot harder with
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our cousins being older. Like, we wouldn't have the same
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privileges we had then to to be here now if you were still
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working your fine nursing job. Yeah.
6:00
As like we're older. I feel like it's so interesting
6:03
because what's funny is that most of the people who come to
6:07
talk to me are like, well, I don't want to do it because my
6:08
kids are so young right now or they're so little, and so
6:11
they're afraid to be away from them for 24.
6:13
Hours. But I'm saying that's better.
6:15
Almost. Yeah.
6:16
Why? Because it's interesting to hear
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from your point of view. I've never really asked you
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this, but from your point of view, why do you think?
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I mean, I was really young, but I think like, I, you know, I'm
6:25
still conscious. I still remember a lot of things
6:27
and, and childhood. But I think being a kid and like
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you being gone, it's less of like, Oh yeah, I remember she
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was gone for this and this. Like you don't have the same
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memory your mind does. Your mind doesn't have the same
6:38
memory as you do now as a high schooler at middle school, you
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don't remember things. You don't take things too
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emotionally. And I think that comes with
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like, you know, hitting puberty and like, or, you know, you just
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your, your brain develops differently as you get older.
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And so I think being a kid, like it wasn't like, Oh yeah, my mom
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missed all these things. It was just like, oh, she was
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gone working. Like she was, she was doing
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things, she was saving lives. Like that's what she was doing.
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And it wasn't like, oh, she missed my awards.
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So now I'm mad at her or whatever.
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So I feel like being a kid, like, yeah, maybe in that moment
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when I you came home and maybe I was mad at you, but I don't
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remember those things. I don't remember those kinds of
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conversations that we had as kids.
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So I think like being younger and then your parents doing it,
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as long as you like close with you have help, you have people
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that can help you or help your kids.
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I think it's important that you can do it while your kids are
7:27
young too, because it's not they're not going to remember
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the same things that you want them to remember as kids.
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And obviously, like, I have core memories of like my childhood,
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but like you being gone, it's not as personal as it is if you
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were still doing it in high school Because then you're like,
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you know, you just get super busy in high school and you want
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to do everything and you want your parents to be there and
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appreciate you. But when you're a kid, yeah, you
7:51
have all these events, but you also have grandma and grandpa to
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take you there. You know, you have you have
7:54
other family members who still make you feel like you are being
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honored in a way. And so I think being a kid is
8:01
just you, you don't take those things to heart.
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And then being, being an older kid, like being in high school
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or going to be a senior, you, you take more things to heart
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and you take things more personally.
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So I think like the memories are different and being a kid, it's
8:15
just it's easier if if your parents are working a job that
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they were gone while you were still having fun with like your
8:22
cousins or your babysitters or your nannies or your dogs or
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whatever, because you have less to care about.
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But as you get older, it's it's different, it's a different
8:30
perspective. And you obviously want your
8:32
parents to be around to like watch you succeed.
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So. I think you made an interesting
8:36
point, which I think is really key for me is it really does
8:41
take a village to one, raise a family and then two, like be
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able to be there for you guys or aspects, especially working in
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healthcare, like I don't know if you remember this, but I worked
8:53
almost every holiday for the almost 15 years that I've been a
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nurse. I worked almost every
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Thanksgiving, every Christmas, like those were the holidays
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that people didn't want to work and I just did it.
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And COVID, I was gone seven days a week because I worked at the
9:06
hospital for five days and then I flew on the weekend.
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And I think you just raised a good point that it doesn't
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always have to be the parent too, and it doesn't always have
9:17
to be family that helps out. It's like lots of different
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people were key people on helping you so that I could go
9:24
and do the job that I wanted to. Do or I think that's the
9:27
difference too, is that you, I, I have those connections with
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the same people today because they were able to raise me in my
9:33
childhood and be a part of that, that aspect of my life.
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And so I think it's it. We are so censored around our
9:40
family and our and our friends and stuff and our family friends
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because because of that, not just because you were working,
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but because dad was working or whatever it was.
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And you, we had to have people around us and we had each other.
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And so I mean, I do remember there, there are times where I
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thought like, oh, I want to go out of town for this holiday or
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I want to go do this for this holiday.
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And you still like made it fun and stuff.
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And you were there when you could be.
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But also I was just like, sometimes I was just let down.
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I was like, oh, she's working Thanksgiving or oh, she's
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missing Christmas Eve, like our traditions and stuff.
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And so it was just like, you know, but I understood like, I
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think it's because you and dad raised us around like being
10:17
honest. And so I think you guys were
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very honest with us about like when, you know, it wasn't like
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you wanted to be working, but you had to be working and you
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had a reason to be. And so I think it was just
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different cuz we understood that at A at a young age, yeah.
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I also think which is so interesting to ask you about cuz
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I have a certain take on it. I feel like especially working
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flight for almost the seven years I did and being gone 24
10:47
hours, like really there were two days a week where you didn't
10:51
see me at all. And then I'd come home and it
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would be almost 48 hours later because you'd go to school and
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then I wanted to see you till that next night, right?
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And then I would be getting ready to go to my next shift.
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And it was only because I worked a 24 hour on, I had 24 hour off
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and then I worked a 24 hour on and then I had five days off in
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a row. But I thought it was very
11:09
interesting for me, my perspective, and I'm curious
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what your perspective was, was that when I was at home, it was
11:15
kind of like my parenting was what was in place.
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And then when I wasn't living at home, it was like dad's
11:22
parenting was in place. And it kind of worked for us
11:26
because I felt like, OK, you got like the fun person and then you
11:30
got me who comes home a couple days a week and is like, let's
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get it all together, let's organize it.
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But like, what was your take on really almost half the week
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having one of us or the the other of us home?
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I mean, I think it was fun because I, if you guys know my
11:47
parents that they're kind of opposites in the way, but they,
11:51
but The thing is they value the same thing.
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So it's like it, it works together.
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And so like when you were gone, like obviously like when we were
11:59
younger, you were, I just remember you being a little bit
12:02
more stricter about like getting things done.
12:03
I think that also comes with raising 4 kids under the age of
12:07
whatever because me and my 2 brother and my older brother are
12:10
really close in age. But so I think that just comes
12:13
with, you know, you have to boss your kids around because they
12:15
won't do it the first time you ask them.
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Like now that I'm looking back at it, but like then I was just
12:20
like, why is she yelling at me? Like what am I doing wrong?
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And like, and it wasn't always like that.
12:25
It was just like, you just tended to be like a little bit
12:28
more stricter on that side because you wanted to get things
12:31
done, which was fine. And then my dad was just more
12:34
mellow. He was like, I just eat
12:35
leftovers that mom made the other night or whatever it was.
12:38
Yeah. It wasn't like he put it on you,
12:40
but it was like, you know, he he felt like he had other things to
12:43
do and like his, his quality was spending a lot of time with us.
12:47
And so it was just like, oh, let's chill and watch a movie.
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But with you, it was like, oh, yeah, let's let's get this done
12:52
and then we can do something. And that was fine.
12:54
I think it was. I think it was a good balance.
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I think it was definitely different because like when I
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would talk to my friends, I'd be like, yeah, well, my mom's home
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right now or my dad's home right now or like whatever.
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It was never like both of you guys were home.
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And I for me, like I kind of felt like I saw that connection
13:08
between you guys that like you, I feel like you guys didn't
13:10
really connect a time because of your job, because you guys
13:13
weren't home at the same times. But I mean, when you were home
13:16
those like 5 days off or whatever, like it was still fun.
13:19
Like we still, you know, it was just like an instant connection
13:21
that we were just able to do stuff again.
13:25
But I think like it was definitely different because you
13:28
guys have two different parenting styles.
13:30
But I think that also made it better because it allowed us to
13:33
like develop both of your guys personalities and attributes and
13:38
to us as we were growing older. So like we knew what we, you
13:41
guys, I mean, I said you guys valued the same things.
13:43
It's like, yeah, we we embodied that and we valued the same
13:46
things too. But we also take a little bit of
13:48
metal side, a little bit of organization, a little bit of
13:50
that. So it's like honestly.
13:53
So it might have been nice in the moment to grow up with you
13:57
guys being not always together because it allowed us to like
14:01
really learn who like our parents are and like, and, and
14:05
at least that's how I took it. I mean, I was only 8 years old,
14:08
but like the fact that I could realize that because I saw how
14:11
it actually was in a marriage between people who both work,
14:15
that it was like just different that like I was able to see both
14:18
attributes in both sides of the story.
14:21
One thing too that I was thinking is because dad really
14:26
worked a lot too. Like he traveled a lot.
14:29
I don't know if you remember that, but he used to travel like
14:31
2 weeks out of each month and sometimes months at a time.
14:35
And then I would also be working my 24 hour shifts and we'd bring
14:38
family and friends in. Like we had close friends that
14:40
you guys would stay at their houses.
14:42
But I feel like for me it really prioritized when we did spend
14:45
time together. Like we'd have to plan out and
14:47
be like, oh, we're going to go on this trip for these days.
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And we really made the most out of when we work together.
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And in some ways, I mean, now that I'm home seven days a week
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and I do a job that works from home, in some ways, I feel like
15:03
it was easier to prioritize back then 'cause it was like I only
15:06
had a certain amount of days off and so did dad.
15:09
So I felt like our moments together were more planned and
15:16
and we were intentional about it too sometimes.
15:19
And I think it's different now just because we're older and a
15:22
lot of my brothers don't want to do anything.
15:24
So it's like it's a lot harder to plan things.
15:26
And we call it force family fun. And I think that just because of
15:32
being a part of family, I think anybody would agree.
15:34
But yeah, I think, I mean, I remember like we'd always do
15:38
Disneyland or whatever it was. Like it just made that time
15:43
different. Like we go to the lake with our
15:44
cousins or you know, it was just we were doing something
15:47
different or the beach, we went to the beach a lot like when you
15:51
guys are both home. So it was just like our trips
15:53
were always fun, like when you guys made the most of it.
15:55
And I also remember like, I mean, I don't think you guys had
15:58
a lot of money like growing up, like raising us.
16:01
So it was just like, it was different though none of those.
16:04
A lot of those things didn't really cost that much money.
16:06
It was just like, it's just spending time, like quality time
16:09
with your family. And I think people take that for
16:12
granted when they think that they're working too much or they
16:15
need to be working as much as they can.
16:17
But obviously with a family like us, like you guys were working
16:20
all the time, but like we also didn't have a ton of money.
16:23
So like doing not doing that and spending time together was also
16:26
just different. Like, like we didn't, none of my
16:28
siblings took it for granted. Like we obviously still had fun.
16:31
We did things and maybe we did in the moment, but as far as I
16:34
remember, I don't think we did. And and those is like, are the
16:37
memories that made-up like the our childhood and like being
16:40
together. And so I think, yeah, like it
16:43
does suck when you guys aren't there, but when we do spend time
16:47
together, it's completely different.
16:48
It's like, it's like we had the whole month off together and it
16:53
was just fun. Like making it fun in the moment
16:55
instead of just being like, oh, well, I can't do anything
16:57
because I'm working. Like you always have another
16:59
option. There's always another option or
17:01
always another reason behind that.
17:03
So there's always time to spend like with your family.
17:07
And I think people, people who try to get into nursing or
17:11
whatever think that they, it takes up their whole entire
17:14
life. But there's always another
17:15
option. There's a reason.
17:17
And obviously if it's taking up your whole entire life, then
17:19
you're probably not doing it right because you should know
17:22
what you're prioritizing. And even like for us, like
17:25
religion, like we prioritize our religion as well.
17:27
And so I think like if you feel like you're spending all your
17:31
time doing work, it's probably because you are spending all
17:33
your time doing work, But it's because you're not thinking
17:35
about it differently. You're not thinking, oh, I need
17:37
to spend time with my kids or I need to get out and, and take a
17:40
trip and take these days off because you, you want to be
17:42
working because you feel like you need to provide or how
17:45
whatever makes you cope with working.
17:47
But obviously working all those hours, it doesn't always mean
17:51
you have to. It just means you want to, Yeah.
17:53
So. Well, and I think, like, really
17:56
prioritizing doing what you want to do means that you're working
18:00
a job that you want to be doing. Yeah.
18:03
Which I think this is an interesting question to ask you.
18:07
And I know like you're on the cusp of like graduating and like
18:10
figuring out what you want to do for the rest of your life and
18:13
like getting into your career. But I think that your dad and I
18:16
have always chose jobs that we haven't felt like we had to do,
18:20
but that we wanted to do. Like nursing was my second
18:22
career and then flight nursing is something I've always wanted
18:25
to do. And so I think that you guys
18:27
have had a really, I mean, not to to are on horns or anything,
18:30
but had good examples of having two parents who enjoy the jobs
18:34
that they do. So what do you think?
18:39
I mean, has that affected you at all?
18:41
Have you thought about that at all?
18:42
Do you, do you have friends who have parents who hate their
18:45
jobs? Like what?
18:46
What has been the result for you?
18:49
And maybe you haven't thought about this question, but what's
18:52
been the result for you having two parents who really love
18:55
their jobs that they're doing? Well, so I, I brought that up
18:58
because I have a lot of friends who have parents who both work
19:02
or, or one of them works like a hardcore job and they're always
19:05
con or whatever it is. And, and they don't spend a lot
19:07
of time with their, their family or their, their daughter or
19:10
their son or whatever it is. Or, and, and that I'm not going
19:15
to say it in a bad light, but it just kind of neglects the kids a
19:18
lot. And it makes them put on all
19:20
this responsibility for all their siblings or their pets or,
19:23
or cleaning the house or whatever.
19:25
It's things that they weren't really taught that they were
19:26
just thrown into. And so I think like you guys
19:31
working jobs that you guys want to do showed us that you can
19:34
also like have a good balance between between working and then
19:38
being also a part of a family. And I think a lot of people or
19:42
people my age too, and adults who are working forget that.
19:46
And I think it's very, it's it's pretty noticeable for me.
19:50
Like I'm, I'm pretty observant person.
19:52
And so I see a room of adults. I'm just like, I can pick out
19:56
who, who really likes what they're doing and you know,
19:58
who's happy and where they are. And it's just like sometimes
20:01
people wear it on their faces and they're just like, yeah,
20:03
this is, this is a job I want to do or it's, yeah, this is a job
20:06
I don't really like, but I have to do it because it pays the
20:08
bills. And like, obviously you've
20:10
changed your career a couple times and and that's totally
20:13
fine. I just think a lot of adults
20:14
don't see it that way. And they see it as I can't do
20:17
this because, because I, I have to be working like non-stop.
20:21
I have to be working 24/7 because because that is what's
20:24
making the money and that's what's providing for my family.
20:26
But I also think that they don't think about how it neglects
20:31
religion and your values or your kids going to school and their
20:34
friends and Hangouts and stuff. Like, I mean, you said you
20:37
don't, you didn't really have a lot of friends over at your
20:40
house. And it was just like, I wouldn't
20:42
say it's like on your parents that it was like neglecting like
20:45
you guys. But I'm just saying like in
20:47
general, like I think us being able to have a lot of friends
20:50
over all the time, it's like different because maybe they
20:53
don't get that kind of support at their home or from other
20:56
people and like us being like the outlet, I guess so that they
21:00
can come over and they can talk to us and they can feel like
21:02
they can trust you guys as well. It's just different because they
21:06
may not get that support at home and maybe they do, but I'm just
21:09
saying like in, in all relative reasons.
21:11
And, and what I've observed is that a lot of people think that
21:15
there really isn't a balance and that you have to choose one over
21:18
the other. And like I said before, it's
21:21
always a choice. And I think that being able to
21:24
be that outlet for somebody is just different.
21:26
And, and I think working, obviously working hard jobs is
21:30
going to be hard and it's going to be hard to have a family and
21:33
do all this stuff that they have to remember the values of what
21:36
they wanted to raise their family around.
21:38
Because then that leaves their kids picking up pieces for their
21:41
siblings or picking up pieces for their, their home.
21:44
And they have to take care of all that stuff.
21:46
And they, they don't have time to like explore what they want
21:49
to do or, or go on trips with their friends or whatever it is.
21:53
And that's just kind of what I've seen as like a teenager in
21:55
high school. It's just like, I see these
21:57
people and they're just like, no, I can't like I, I have to be
21:59
home. I have to watch my, my sibling
22:00
or whatever, or I'm working or I have to find a job.
22:04
My parents are making me find a job.
22:05
Like I'm not saying it's all on the parents, but I, I just think
22:08
like that also comes with you don't know what they like come
22:11
home to or like the people that they have in their lives.
22:17
And I mean, I think just sometimes people get neglected
22:20
and they don't see that balance. So I think that balance is
22:22
really important to have that those connections with people,
22:25
but also being able to like raise your kids or or your
22:28
siblings around things that that you want them to value growing
22:32
up. So that's what I was thinking.
22:35
About yeah, I think there's like two things that I really take
22:38
from this conversation so far. And one is, I think working
22:45
shift work my whole career and being gone the hours that I was
22:51
really taught me that you have to like take care of yourself
22:54
first. Like you have to make time for
22:56
the things that you enjoy and take care of your mental health
23:00
and do fun things. And I always try to prioritize
23:05
that. And I try to teach you guys to
23:06
prioritize that too. I think like that can be easy as
23:10
a teenager and both as a parent who works to not prioritize
23:15
that. And I think that's where people
23:16
get stuck in that. And then I forgot the other
23:21
thing that I was going to say. Yeah, I mean, a lot of people
23:24
don't prioritize themself enough.
23:26
And I mean, me included, you know, just being a teenager.
23:29
That's like part of it. Not even just like being a teen,
23:32
but like that could also come with being a kid and the people
23:36
you were raised by or your, your friends or whatever it is.
23:40
And, and you can get carried away sometimes with the things
23:44
that you want, but you aren't actually focused on yourself.
23:46
And I said, you know, it takes 2 to have a relationship.
23:49
And part of it is just being able to like be yourself in, in
23:54
any room that you walk into. And it's, it's hard, but it's
23:59
most important is to like be yourself and like kind of like
24:03
what you were saying is like connecting with yourself before
24:05
you have that relationship with somebody or you have that
24:07
relationship with work or religion or whatever it is.
24:10
It's like you have to be grounded and like who you are
24:12
because things are constantly going to be changing and you
24:15
have to be able to work around that.
24:17
Yeah. And that can, that can apply in
24:19
any situation. But like specifically what we're
24:21
talking about flight nursing and, and you working when I was
24:24
a kid in my childhood, it's just different because I saw that you
24:28
guys prioritize what you guys wanted to do and but you were
24:32
also able to have a family and, and do all this stuff with us.
24:36
And I think that that just came with time and, and you guys
24:41
loving each other and loving our family.
24:42
And so I think it's just different because you guys had
24:45
that balance. But I think, yeah, loving,
24:48
loving yourself is probably the most important thing because if
24:51
you don't love yourself, you could do a job that you like and
24:53
don't don't love yourself. And that can cause you to not
24:56
like the job that you're doing or not like the way that you're
24:59
doing it. And you want to change for you
25:01
think for the better. But it's also just different
25:04
perspective. Different people are going to be
25:05
able to do different things and different people are also going
25:08
to be able to be better than you.
25:10
So it's like there, there is no like point where where you're
25:13
like, I'm I've perfected it. But I just think like, yeah,
25:18
loving yourself is probably the most important thing.
25:20
And that comes in in any situation.
25:24
But like foreshadowing, like the work aspect, it's just you have
25:28
to be able to love the way that you do everything.
25:32
Obviously you want to make sure that you're doing it right, but
25:34
I think like if you prioritize the way that you're doing it,
25:37
you're never going to look at somebody else and be like,
25:38
they're doing it such a different way.
25:39
I'm like, am I doing it wrong? If you want to be able to know
25:42
that, yo, no, I'm doing it right.
25:44
This is the right way I'm doing it.
25:45
And, and this is just the way I, I do it.
25:48
And that that's just like an affirmation.
25:51
It's just something that you also grow up in and in a world
25:55
full of people who just, you know, they think that you can't
25:59
do it or they, they want to feel better about themselves.
26:01
And it's, it's hard, but it comes with like, no, I just do
26:06
it a different way. I'm just taking a different
26:08
path. And that's totally OK because
26:10
people for teenagers, I know we're kind of getting off top of
26:13
it for teenagers. It's like there's so many paths
26:16
and people tell you that and there's like, oh, there's so
26:18
many paths. There's so many colleges you can
26:19
go to. There's whatever.
26:20
But there's also people who aren't going to college.
26:23
There's people who have to stay home, or we watch their siblings
26:27
because their parents aren't around, or there's people who
26:29
they can't afford to go to college, or there's people who
26:32
don't know what they want to do. So they're taking a gap year or
26:34
whatever it is. And it's like nobody has it
26:36
figured out and everybody expects you to.
26:38
And so, you know, people see it as, oh, you have to have like a
26:42
4.5 GPA to get in this college to do the career that you want
26:46
to do. But that's not realistic.
26:48
You have your whole lifetime to do that.
26:50
But they just put so much pressure on you.
26:52
I say they as like teenagers, as adults, as families, as friends,
26:57
cousins, counsellors, you know, people just come up to you and
27:01
they're like, what are your plans?
27:03
And you're just like, I don't know, like, how do I know?
27:05
This is like, I haven't even gone on that path yet.
27:08
Like I don't even know if this is the right path.
27:10
I'm just doing it. So I think having that
27:12
self-confidence is like, yeah, this is the path I want to take.
27:14
And I've kind of always known what I've wanted to do.
27:16
So it's just different. But I think like being like,
27:19
yeah, I know where I kind of want to go to college and you
27:21
talk and you get people's different perspectives, but
27:24
it's, it's taking that path and then committing to it and being
27:27
like, yeah, this is what I want to do.
27:29
I'm confident that I can do it, that it's achievable.
27:32
And and if I have to take a different path to get there,
27:35
then I have to take a different path.
27:37
That's that's completely OK too. So, yeah, I think a lot of
27:39
people are scared because there's a lot of pressure on
27:43
that. And you've never been in that
27:45
position before. You've never had to choose,
27:47
you've never been a part of that career that how do you supposed
27:50
to know that's what you want to do?
27:51
And so people are scared to change it because they don't
27:54
like change. They don't like adjusting to
27:55
change. But obviously, like, if you're
27:57
confident in yourself and you're confident that you can do that,
28:00
then why don't you do it? You know, you can pull the plug
28:02
if you're even thinking about it.
28:03
That's probably the reason why you're supposed to be doing it,
28:07
if it's even coming up in your head that you're like, oh, I
28:08
kind of want to do this instead of this, or I just want to move
28:11
away instead of stay at home for college or whatever it is.
28:13
Then do it like there's a reason you had that thought.
28:16
And it's just taking those actions and those steps to do
28:18
it. And it's having the confidence
28:20
in yourself that you're like, yeah, I'm going to be the same
28:22
person I was here. Then I am going to be somewhere
28:24
else. Yeah.
28:26
And this really leads me into like this, I forgot the second
28:28
thing I was going to say, but now I remember as you're saying,
28:30
that is making these decisions like stepping into your
28:33
potential, whether it's flight nursing or what you're doing
28:36
after school for you graduating. It's like really thinking into
28:39
the future, making the decision. Because I think what I always
28:43
try to get you guys to do and the clients that I'm working
28:45
with who are trying to go to flight is think about where do
28:48
you want to be in three years? Where do you want to be in five
28:50
years? And that's the reason why I
28:52
switched from doing banking and working at a bank to being a
28:56
nurse, because I knew I wanted to have kids and I knew I wanted
29:00
to be able to be home four days a week and work three days a
29:03
week with shift work. And then I knew I wanted to get
29:06
flight because I knew I wanted to have five days off in a row
29:08
and be with you guys more. And then when I transitioned out
29:12
of flight and then I went into life coaching, it's because I
29:15
knew the high school years was when I wanted to be at home with
29:18
you. And now I'm now thinking about
29:21
five years ahead and having grandchildren and where I want
29:24
my business to be and my programs to be and I'm making
29:26
shifts and changes and that way. So I think like I've, I've
29:31
really tried to encourage you guys to, to think about when
29:35
you're stuck right now, like where do you want to be in three
29:37
years? Where do you want to be in five
29:38
years? And I think that's been helpful
29:39
for you. Yeah.
29:40
And I think that also comes with like, of course, being like a
29:44
little freshman I was and people, counselors already start
29:48
talking to you about colleges and, like, thinking about your
29:51
careers. And I feel like in high school,
29:54
I mean, at least for me, I definitely took it less
29:55
seriously because I was like, oh, like, they're getting paid
29:59
to do this. Like, they just have to come in
30:01
and tell us that we're supposed to be thinking about that.
30:03
Yeah. But I think even for like your
30:06
clients, it's, it is hard to think about the future and think
30:09
about where you want to be in three years.
30:11
And I think when I think about that, it's like I'm thinking of
30:14
all the, the blockage that I receive, all the, you know, I, I
30:18
don't, I don't live in this certain city.
30:20
So I can't do that. Or I have this relationship with
30:22
this person that I don't want to lose.
30:24
So it's like you see all those blockages when you, when you
30:27
think of where do I want to be in three years and where do I
30:29
want to be in five years? But I've definitely learned like
30:33
this year, it's just kind of like you have to go with the
30:35
flow of things and you have to be able to trust that like
30:37
everything is going to work out the way you want it to.
30:39
And you also have to be able to be willing to put in that effort
30:43
if it doesn't work out the way that you want it to.
30:45
And like you always say, like, don't take no for an answer.
30:47
Like you're just supposed to do it and you're supposed to learn
30:51
and make mistakes. And that's kind of just part of
30:54
it. And so I think going with the
30:55
flow also is just like good to if you have general like bullet
30:59
points, like this is what I want to do.
31:00
I want to go to like for me, it's like I want to go to, I
31:02
want to graduate, I want to go to college and I want to get my
31:05
degree or I want to go on a mission.
31:06
And those are just big bullet points leading up to the rest of
31:11
my life. And these are the things that
31:13
are going to change me in the future.
31:15
So it's like in the next three years, I'm going to be graduated
31:18
in a year from now, I'll have my first year of college under my
31:21
belt, and then I'll probably go on my mission for another year
31:23
and a half. That's in the next 3 1/2, four
31:26
years of my life. And those are huge commitments
31:29
and huge steps. But I obviously have to be
31:30
comfortable in in being like, yeah, this is who I am and this
31:34
is what I want to do. And yeah, this is going to
31:36
define me. That's completely OK.
31:38
So it is hard because these are things that I want to do that
31:42
I've known I've wanted to do, but it's hard when you sit next
31:46
to somebody who's like, I have no idea what I want to do.
31:48
And I don't know if my parents are going to support me in this
31:50
and, and all this stuff. And so I think like my
31:54
perspective of three years from now is different than than
31:58
people who who don't know what they want to do now or haven't
32:01
known the in the past. Because you're like able to look
32:04
further ahead. Yeah, because I'm able to look,
32:06
Oh yeah, in the next 5 years from now, I want to be graduated
32:08
with this degree and I want to have an own family.
32:10
I want to get married. And it's different because I,
32:13
I've known, but for people, if I was sitting next to somebody who
32:17
didn't know what they wanted to do, I'd honestly just tell them
32:19
that you have so much time to figure it out.
32:22
Because being a part of life, everybody thinks that you have
32:26
to be married and have kids before you're 30 or 40 or
32:29
whatever it is, because that's, that's how life works.
32:32
But it isn't. Life is what you make it and
32:36
what you believe in, what you value and your reasons behind
32:39
everything. And you said you adjusted your
32:41
careers based off of where and who you wanted to be for us in
32:44
the future or, or for yourself. And I think that that came with
32:49
a lot of time and that came with a lot of commitment as well.
32:51
But I think you did your role in the things that you wanted to do
32:54
and you were kind of ready for the next thing.
32:56
And so I think that comes with you also have to adjust with the
33:00
courses that happened in your life and the people that come
33:02
into your life. And that comes with what do you
33:04
value. So I mean, if you ask somebody
33:07
who didn't know what they wanted to do in three years from now,
33:10
they don't know yet, but they can have bullet points, they can
33:13
have ideas, they can write down the pros and cons.
33:16
They can, you know, their, their steps through their baby steps.
33:19
It's not like, oh, I want to do this, this and this.
33:21
And some people do so that's totally fine.
33:23
But there's a lot of people out there that are probably like,
33:26
how am I supposed to know what I want to do in three years if I
33:28
don't even know what I'm interested in?
33:30
And that's just putting your foot in many different rooms and
33:33
meeting different people. And, you know, maybe life will
33:36
throw something at you and you're like a man that seems
33:37
super cool. I want to do that.
33:39
And so you don't know, but you can make ideas and you can list
33:43
things and you can you can take baby steps to figure it out.
33:46
And this this can all develop within the next three years.
33:49
And maybe you're not where you're at.
33:51
You want to be at in three years, but you're already taking
33:53
steps to be there in six years or 10 years from now.
33:56
So it's just, yeah, it's just baby steps.
33:59
Well, and I think it's also anchoring the desire of you
34:01
wanting to do it because obstacles will come up.
34:05
You're going to have mental like how am I going to do it?
34:07
And that's why looking to the future is so important.
34:09
And then also anchoring your desire of where you want to be
34:12
in three years is really important.
34:14
And it's almost like you're working backwards.
34:16
Yeah. Because.
34:17
Because for me, like, oh, I want to have this degree or I want to
34:20
be on my mission in three years from now.
34:22
What am I going to? What steps am I going to take
34:24
now that's going to help me? I mean, it's my last year in
34:26
high school. What do I to do in high school
34:29
that high school can offer me that colleges can't or the rest
34:32
of, you know, other people I know can't offer me.
34:35
And so it's really just hyper focusing on like the things that
34:39
I have now and like all the opportunities I have in high
34:43
school because it's like, Oh yeah, I'm reaching my last year
34:45
high school. It's like, well, what, what did
34:47
they offer me that I can't get anywhere else?
34:49
Yeah. Because you bring up a good
34:50
point, which is like something, and I, and I know we're kind of
34:53
going off topic here, but you bring up a good point, which is
34:55
something that I always teach too, is you have to look to the
34:59
future to be able to make decisions.
35:01
So for example, and I'm going to put flight nursing in here too,
35:04
for example, you know that you want to be a vet.
35:06
So instead of saying you want to go to college, a college, and
35:10
there's thousands of colleges available to you, you know that
35:13
you want to be a vet. So you are going to go and only
35:15
go to a school that offers your major.
35:17
That's going to get you there, which narrows it down because
35:20
you're forward thinking about where you want to be in four
35:22
years. And same with flight.
35:24
If you just want to say you're going to be a nurse, there's
35:27
thousands of departments you can work.
35:28
But if you want to go flight nursing, then you know there's
35:31
an exact path that you want to start taking now that's going to
35:33
make your choices narrower. So thinking from the future
35:37
helps you narrow down your choices and actually helps your
35:40
how become a lot simpler. And I think that also changes
35:43
your mindset on things as well. I think it helps you be
35:47
confident in, in talking to other people about the career
35:50
and make that, make that big decision of being like, this is
35:52
the career I want to go into. Because you were able to narrow
35:57
that down and you, you kind of have a rough draft of like where
36:00
you want to go to college or whatever it is.
36:02
Yeah, where, where you want to be.
36:04
And so having that rough draft, it's like, OK, how can I
36:07
mentally prepare myself? And like, what can I, what books
36:10
can I can I get that I can read and study this topic on or
36:13
whatever it is. And it's just the fact of like,
36:15
Oh, yeah, ready to jump all in and do it all in because, you
36:19
know, oh, this is such a narrow area here that that that's the
36:24
where where I'm going. That's where I'm headed.
36:26
But now it's like, OK, well, what do I do from here?
36:29
What do I do to fill that time before I reach that point?
36:32
So I think a lot of it is should be on focusing on like your
36:36
career. But for me, it's like, Oh yeah,
36:38
I want to be a vet. So what am I going to do now
36:39
while I quit water polo too? I quit my sports team to raise
36:44
an animal because I wanted that hands on experience.
36:46
And it may not be in the same area because I don't want to
36:49
work with AG animals. It's different, but I'm still
36:52
jumping in to do it. And I'm doing it because I want
36:54
that experience because it's it is similar in that way.
36:57
And I do know like where I want to be in the three years from
37:01
now. Yeah.
37:01
So I think like, obviously it comes with sacrifices, but like,
37:06
because I knew what I wanted to do, I took that baby step.
37:08
High school was offered me this. This is the opportunity I was
37:11
offered. And also like it, I was just
37:14
offered other things that I was just like, yeah, these are just
37:16
signs that I'm just like, this is what I'm supposed to be
37:18
doing. And so this is what high
37:20
school's offering me. I'm doing this for me.
37:23
I'm doing this because I know where I want to be in three
37:25
years or five years from now and the career I want to do in the
37:28
future. So that's the thing that high
37:30
school's offering me, and that's not really anything I can get a
37:33
lot like anywhere else. Yeah.
37:35
So that's just. I do believe it makes it clear
37:38
for you, your path, when you know where you want to be in
37:41
three years, five years or whatever.
37:42
But it's also like when you jump head in and do it because I
37:45
could do it and then realize I don't like it anymore and that's
37:49
fine, but you have to do it. Yeah, but I still have to do it
37:51
because I committed to it, right?
37:52
So, yeah, but if, if I do it and I decide, hey, like I graduate
37:57
high school, I'm like, hey, this is just not for me.
37:59
Like I, I tried it hands on. Maybe it's not the same way, but
38:02
I'm still going to be working with animals in that way.
38:04
So I just don't like it. I think I'm such my major,
38:07
whatever it is. So then I'm now I'm going into
38:10
college thinking, Oh, I'm going to major in this thing instead
38:12
because I don't want to major in animal science anymore or
38:14
whatever it is because I don't want to do it because I had that
38:17
opportunity in high school to to take that respond.
38:21
So to take that opportunity. And so then it wasn't like, Oh,
38:24
I never did that. I continued playing water polo.
38:26
Then I went to college, majored in animal science.
38:29
And then I'm just like, yeah, this is not what I want to do.
38:31
So it's, it's figuring it out earlier.
38:33
And obviously, obviously things happen for a reason.
38:35
So the fact that I, you know, if I were to figure that out
38:38
earlier that I didn't like it, going into college would be a
38:40
lot easier. Maybe I'd be roomed with
38:42
different people who had the same major as me or whatever it
38:45
was. And so I'd already know I came
38:47
into college knowing that that's not what I want to do and that I
38:50
can change it. And I think a lot of people talk
38:53
about changing majors in college is hard because because they're
38:57
scared of what it's going to do to them and their housing and
39:01
the situation and financial situations and whatever it is.
39:03
And they feel like they're not going to be supported in that
39:06
way. But I think you should take the
39:09
opportunities that you're given now for what you want to do and
39:13
then you your future can be planned out that way.
39:15
And so obviously like I wouldn't have that opportunity if if I
39:19
didn't take that chance and then take that leap.
39:21
So. Well, the key is to take action,
39:23
because if you don't take action, then how do you know if
39:25
it's not for you exactly? You have to, you have to do
39:27
that. OK, so we've talked about a lot
39:31
of things. We've covered a lot and you
39:34
weren't even sure that we were going to have enough to talk
39:36
about. So we talked about a lot.
39:39
Let's let's I want to ask you some lighter questions.
39:44
What are some annoying things that I do?
39:48
Is there anything annoying so people can learn the whole
39:53
robust and of me? Maybe when?
40:00
I don't even know. Sometimes I'm sleeping in my
40:02
room and I don't really like actually have a door.
40:04
I had like a sliding door, barn door, so I can hear everything
40:08
from my room and it's right next to the kitchen.
40:11
And sometimes in the morning, she's like blending her little
40:14
whatever you drink in the morning, protein shake.
40:16
And it's so annoying because I can't, I can't sleep.
40:19
I already wake and I'm kind of like a light sleeper, kind of
40:21
like I don't really take a lot of naps or anything unless I'm
40:23
like sick. So I like immediately wake up
40:26
and I'm just like, OK, now I can't go back to sleep because
40:29
she's being really loud. I don't know.
40:30
Sometimes you're putting dishes away On Saturdays, it's like,
40:33
oh, cleaning house day, it's like 10:00 AM in the morning.
40:37
So sometimes that's it's that and you're just like being
40:40
really loud. But same with Dad, he's really
40:42
loud sometimes and likes to be. Anything else we didn't talk
40:45
about on this episode that you want to share with people that
40:51
might be listening or share about me or you?
40:54
Anything else that we missed that you want to leave us with?
40:58
They should share this with their kids because especially if
41:01
you're a teenager, because I feel like it, it will be
41:03
helpful. And people, everybody, all
41:05
teenagers think about these things, but they don't talk
41:08
about it. They, they really don't.
41:10
And they, and they, you know, they like these videos or
41:13
whatever that people are talking about things that happen in high
41:15
school because they, they can't see the overview or they don't
41:18
want to talk about it with, with their parents or they don't have
41:20
that relationship. And like, I feel like for me,
41:23
like the, the whole point of being a kid and a teenager and
41:29
an adult is you're just figuring it out.
41:32
You're going to always be kind of unsatisfied with your life.
41:36
I feel like in certain aspects, because you're always going to
41:38
be jumping to the next thing. And that's just part of being
41:40
human and having those emotions. So being like, Oh yeah, I want
41:43
to, I want to have this job and I want to be married and have
41:45
the, and have kids. But you're going to be like, oh,
41:48
but I don't like this piece of furniture, so I want to get a
41:51
new one or, or I don't like our house, so I want to move into a
41:53
different house. Or I want, you know, the horses
41:56
instead of dogs or whatever it is.
41:58
Like it's just nobody has it figured out.
42:01
And even I feel like as adults, like you guys try to be the best
42:04
mentors for your kids and you guys pretend like you have it
42:06
all figured out. But I think the best thing is to
42:08
be transparent with your kids. And that also comes with you
42:12
guys working jobs that you are are busy doing all the time.
42:17
But it's having that connection with those kids and then being
42:20
honest and transparent, especially as a teenager, I
42:22
think that's very important. You should be very transparent
42:24
with your teens and your teens should be transparent with you.
42:27
And maybe you guys don't always have that relationship, but it's
42:30
it's the fact that in both of you don't have it figured out.
42:32
So what are you guys going to do together that's going to help
42:34
build that in the future, whether careerize or or other
42:39
things in your life. I just would leave with nobody
42:43
has figured out. And I think when you take those
42:47
baby steps, you can't be ashamed of taking baby steps because
42:51
some other people are probably going to take these gigantic
42:53
steps and do what they want to do.
42:55
And maybe that's just not how you roll.
42:57
And maybe you can't do that or you don't have the same
42:59
opportunities as them. So there's no shame in taking
43:02
those baby steps into what you want to do in your careers.
43:05
And and maybe it's being friends with people.
43:08
It's like you, you can't be ashamed for just living your
43:11
life because if you don't have it figured out or you value
43:15
different things as somebody else, like, you can't just let
43:17
that stop you. Like, taking those baby steps is
43:19
still just as important as you achieving that career in the
43:23
future. So.
43:24
Yeah. And I think like the overall
43:25
thing I want to leave with the listeners too that we had in
43:28
this conversation is we have potential to do whatever we
43:33
want. And you don't have to be a
43:34
teenager just getting ready to graduate high school.
43:37
You can be in your 40s like me and potentially do something
43:41
different. You just have to have the desire
43:43
that you know, you're supposed to fulfill something else.
43:46
And you just have the desire of wanting to create that for
43:49
yourself. And so I hope you guys felt this
43:51
in today's episode. I hope you got to know a little
43:53
bit more about me and my conversation with my daughter
43:57
and I hope you join us on next weeks episode of Frontline
44:01
Static. And if you know that flight is
44:04
something that you have always wanted and you have felt that
44:06
potential and that tug and that desire of wanting to do it, come
44:10
join us inside the Flight Perp Academy.
44:12
We'll help you see it all the way through.
44:13
That's it this week. We'll see you guys later.
44:15
Bye. Anything in this episode sparked
44:17
your interest into getting into flight?
44:18
Come join my flight pet group. We are an entire community that
44:22
meets together on a weekly basis with an ongoing group chat.
44:25
And if you are already flying and you are currently a flight
44:27
nurse or flight medic, you can join my all flight clinician
44:30
group as well. You can click on the link to
44:32
join in the show notes or you can DM me on Instagram.
44:34
I hope to see all of you guys inside.