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The Breakfast Club BEST OF - Self Help - Dr. Cheyenne Bryant, Wallo, Jay Shetty + More · The Breakfast Club

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Good morning, Usa yo yo yo yo yo yo yo
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: yo yo yo.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: Jesse Hilarry asks that morning is Wednesday.
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: Happy in New Year's Now, today's show is all about
• 0:14
  Speaker 3: self help. Charlamane got some special guests joining us today.
• 0:17
  Speaker 4: You always say guests the special. Who are these people?
• 0:19
  Speaker 5: Wilo, He's joining us today?
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: Very special, that's my guy, Jay Shetty yo Man, very
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: very special.
• 0:24
  Speaker 4: Now you see you really talking about some special people.
• 0:26
  Speaker 5: And doctor sha Ye.
• 0:26
  Speaker 4: And Briant very special individuals.
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: All three of those people will help people in various ways.
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: What I really love about all three of those individuals
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: is their commitment to making sure that our people are
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: emotionally and mentally healthy.
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: That's right, And we're gonna be talking to those three
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: individuals next all throughout the show, so that don't go anywhere.
• 0:44
  Speaker 5: It's to breakfast club. Good morning, this is your time
• 0:48
  Speaker 5: to get it off your chest.
• 0:49
  Speaker 6: Eight hundred five eight five one O five one. We
• 0:52
  Speaker 6: want to hear from you on the Breakfast Club.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: Hello, who's this.
• 0:58
  Speaker 5: Hey to me? Cause get it off your mama?
• 1:00
  Speaker 7: Okay, good morning. He did and be Charlsmagne. I'm a
• 1:03
  Speaker 7: saying I just wanted to get off my chest to
• 1:07
  Speaker 7: the fact that I did nothing. And now I'm broken
• 1:12
  Speaker 7: up with the boyfriend that I've been once for three
• 1:14
  Speaker 7: years because his girlfriend, his side girlfriend, thinks that I'm
• 1:19
  Speaker 7: her stalker.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Wait a minute, his side girlfriend, did you lost the stalker?
• 1:24
  Speaker 5: M hm.
• 1:25
  Speaker 4: Explain this to me a little bit more now, So.
• 1:28
  Speaker 8: Okay, okay.
• 1:29
  Speaker 7: So I've been with this boy for like almost three years, okay,
• 1:33
  Speaker 7: and when I came out of my relationship, he came
• 1:38
  Speaker 7: out of his relationship for a long time, and he
• 1:41
  Speaker 7: still wanted to explore and all that, and we didn't
• 1:43
  Speaker 7: know what we was. So he told me like, oh,
• 1:47
  Speaker 7: I'm talking to this one, I'm talking to that one
• 1:49
  Speaker 7: and talking that one. So it's like, okay, whatever. So
• 1:52
  Speaker 7: Tom had passed and he has started moving his stuff
• 1:55
  Speaker 7: into my apartment and we started establishing and thinks I
• 1:59
  Speaker 7: worked for the city. I put him on my assurance.
• 2:02
  Speaker 7: He started established smouldn't make him plans. I didn't realize
• 2:06
  Speaker 7: how strong of a connection he was making with other girls.
• 2:10
  Speaker 7: But then he comes to me one day and tells
• 2:12
  Speaker 7: me that's the other girl.
• 2:14
  Speaker 4: Okay, Okay, I've heard enough. So you're not his only girl.
• 2:17
  Speaker 7: No, I'm not his only girl.
• 2:18
  Speaker 4: No, okay, So what are you calling her to ask?
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: But she's upset because she put him on insurance.
• 2:24
  Speaker 7: I wasn't asking anything.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Oh, you just you're just mad at yourself for being stupid. Hey, yes,
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: how old are you?
• 2:29
  Speaker 7: Thirty four?
• 2:30
  Speaker 4: Thirty four years old? How many girls has.
• 2:32
  Speaker 6: This man got?
• 2:33
  Speaker 3: Who knows how.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: Many East infections have you had? Since?
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: Your pH balance is always hard?
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: Stop it?
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: Come on? Oh okay, I understand though, because you put
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: him on insurance, he moved in. You thought it was
• 2:48
  Speaker 3: more serious than it was, and he was still playing
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: the field.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: Well see see, I want to tell you that that
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: you know you can do better.
• 2:54
  Speaker 7: That's not the part that I'm mad at. The part
• 2:56
  Speaker 7: that I'm mad at is that I have nothing to
• 2:58
  Speaker 7: do with other relationships and I'm being too of being
• 3:04
  Speaker 7: a random girl. So why would you do you notice that?
• 3:07
  Speaker 5: Why would you even care?
• 3:08
  Speaker 3: You shouldn't even speak care.
• 3:10
  Speaker 7: This is what I'm saying. You've ever been a chub
• 3:12
  Speaker 7: or something who absolutely did not do yes and just frustrated.
• 3:17
  Speaker 7: But then he's also super relief because it's like you
• 3:21
  Speaker 7: never trust me in the beginning. But it's just super fussing.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: Stops it.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: Understand your upset, but stop cursing. But understand that the
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: truth don't need no defense. It only needs witnesses. So
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: as long as you know the truth, that's the most
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: important thing. But the truth is you just wanted this
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: man's holes. Now you need to ask yourself, do you
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: just want to be one of this man's holes or
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: do you want to be more to somebody? Because if
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: you want to be more to somebody, then you need
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: to go find that somebody because it's not gonna be
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: with him.
• 3:49
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm sorry you went through that, mama, but take
• 3:51
  Speaker 5: him went through it.
• 3:52
  Speaker 4: He's still going to it.
• 3:53
  Speaker 5: Now, take him off.
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: She ain't gonna do nothing.
• 3:55
  Speaker 9: Still.
• 3:57
  Speaker 4: Yeah, who that talking to you in the background.
• 3:59
  Speaker 7: Nobody that's on the radio?
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, man, you just another one of his holes.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Man and I and you know, I think that you
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: deserve better than that. But you know, he did keep
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: it one honey with you from the beginning. It's not
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: like he lied in you.
• 4:09
  Speaker 3: He didn't lie, And y'all didn't have a conversation. You
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: just assumed because he moved in. But that was not
• 4:14
  Speaker 3: a great assumption, obviously.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: I know it's hard. I know it's hard. Three four
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: years of raw sex. Three you know what I'm saying,
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: him blowing in your bookie. I know it got I
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: know it got you a little open man, but you
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: know you deserve better.
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Mama.
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: Have a good day.
• 4:30
  Speaker 5: Damn man. She's take him off insurance right now.
• 4:33
  Speaker 3: You get it off your chest. Eight hundred five eight five,
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: one oh five on the breakfast club.
• 4:37
  Speaker 5: Good morning, the breakfast Club, right right, ray.
• 4:45
  Speaker 3: Yo, Charla man day, what up are we lying?
• 4:48
  Speaker 6: This is your time to get it off your chest?
• 4:50
  Speaker 8: I got an indoor pool, outdoor pool.
• 4:53
  Speaker 5: We want to hear from you on the breakfast club.
• 4:54
  Speaker 10: Get on the phone right now.
• 4:56
  Speaker 8: He'll tell you what it is.
• 4:57
  Speaker 6: We lie, Hello, who's this?
• 5:00
  Speaker 10: It's done to the Haitian therapist?
• 5:03
  Speaker 4: You forever, Sandra? Where you've been at?
• 5:06
  Speaker 10: I know, working? You know a busy seasons for depression
• 5:10
  Speaker 10: and anxiety.
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: Yes it is seasonal. Seasonal depression is the real thing
• 5:14
  Speaker 4: around this time of you.
• 5:15
  Speaker 10: So I listened to the doctor Scheyenne Bryant interview, and
• 5:19
  Speaker 10: I just wanted to make clear that she is not
• 5:22
  Speaker 10: a licensed therapist. Some of the things she was saying
• 5:25
  Speaker 10: was pretty concerning, especially with saying people can't change. That's
• 5:31
  Speaker 10: the foundation of our whole you know thing, is that
• 5:35
  Speaker 10: you can change, and that it would be completely unethical
• 5:39
  Speaker 10: to see a wife and a husband separately and then
• 5:43
  Speaker 10: together for couples counseling. That is not something that counselors
• 5:47
  Speaker 10: can do.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: I think people took out it, they took it out
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: of context when she said you can't change. So she
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: was just saying that you got to be willing to
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: shift something in you first before you make a permanent change.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: No, because even even you questioned it, like you know
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: what I mean, Like she she said that asking you question.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: They don't change. People pivot, she said.
• 6:12
  Speaker 4: She said that the basis starts.
• 6:15
  Speaker 10: To therapy that you can change. And so doctor Elliott Khannie,
• 6:19
  Speaker 10: he is like my number one. If it wasn't for him,
• 6:23
  Speaker 10: I wouldn't have gone into private practice because solution focused
• 6:26
  Speaker 10: brief therapy is my favorite.
• 6:29
  Speaker 5: It's the best modality.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: Yes, he is.
• 6:32
  Speaker 4: It is absolutely the best.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: You everybody should pick up Elliot Cohanne's book, Change Your Questions,
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: Change Your Futures out right now.
• 6:38
  Speaker 10: And thank you for calling because you can't change, no problem.
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: And I got the Family Therapist podcast on the Black
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: Effect iHeart Radio podcast network, hosted by Elliott Khan.
• 6:47
  Speaker 6: Hello, who's this?
• 6:49
  Speaker 8: Good morning? This is James called from North Carolina.
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: James from the Carolina Get it off your Chest with
• 6:53
  Speaker 3: part I'm from Lumberton, Lumberton, All right, get it off
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: your chest?
• 6:56
  Speaker 5: Brother?
• 6:57
  Speaker 8: Uh yeah, I wanted to ask y'all when y'all all
• 7:00
  Speaker 8: interviewed Julia White, did he happen to mention what it
• 7:03
  Speaker 8: was like to work with Uh, Michael Boogaloo Shrimp Chambers.
• 7:07
  Speaker 6: Who the hell is this?
• 7:09
  Speaker 5: Michael?
• 7:11
  Speaker 8: Y'all, y'all don't remember him? Man, that's Turbo from Breaking
• 7:14
  Speaker 8: and Breaking Too.
• 7:16
  Speaker 4: Breaking was my movie.
• 7:17
  Speaker 5: And then we can't ask about Wow.
• 7:19
  Speaker 11: Nah, I ain't no where he worked.
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: He was in the movie.
• 7:22
  Speaker 7: Nah.
• 7:23
  Speaker 8: He was in one of the episodes on Family Matters.
• 7:27
  Speaker 8: He played us erkle Bot.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: I don't remember that.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: We didn't ask about that one, Brom Luthor Turbo though,
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: you threw me off and you said, Michael Boogaloo, yeah boo, Yeah,
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: you ain't asking about that one.
• 7:36
  Speaker 8: Brother, Yeah, man, I just I was just wondering.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Craz I never knew Turbo's real name until you said it,
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: and I thought Boogoloo was the light skinned.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: With the head water had m h and the nose
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: are Yeah, I ain't know that was ter Get it.
• 7:49
  Speaker 3: Off your chest. Eight hundred five eight five one oh
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: five one. If you need to vent, hit us up now.
• 7:53
  Speaker 3: It's the Breakfast Club. Good Morning, the Breakfast Club.
• 7:59
  Speaker 8: Morning.
• 7:59
  Speaker 3: Everybody is DJ n V, Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne the God.
• 8:03
  Speaker 3: We are the Breakfast Club. Laura Ross here as well.
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: We got special guests in the building. We have doctor
• 8:08
  Speaker 3: Cheyenne Bryant.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Welcome buff And you are one of the people in
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: the mental health space.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: Who are who's us? Who's really using social media?
• 8:17
  Speaker 6: Right right?
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: Like you know, because you've used it to you know,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: elevate your platform and just elevate the conversation around mental health.
• 8:23
  Speaker 4: So I applaud you on.
• 8:24
  Speaker 11: Yeah, thank you.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: I appreciate that.
• 8:25
  Speaker 12: Yeah.
• 8:26
  Speaker 13: I always say I didn't get into this field to
• 8:27
  Speaker 13: become a celebrity. But God has his own plans, right,
• 8:30
  Speaker 13: So I literally am my master's and my doctorate program.
• 8:33
  Speaker 13: I remember my professor was saying, everyone who's gonna get license,
• 8:36
  Speaker 13: raise your hand. I didn't raise my hand everybody else did,
• 8:38
  Speaker 13: and he's like, Doc, you going you know with Shayan
• 8:40
  Speaker 13: at that time, you're going.
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: Through all this not your license.
• 8:42
  Speaker 13: I'm like no, because I'm gonna be on a platform
• 8:44
  Speaker 13: where I'm able to change lives. Didn't think that it
• 8:46
  Speaker 13: ended up being a platform where to this magnitude one
• 8:49
  Speaker 13: and then to the place where literally I didn't want it,
• 8:52
  Speaker 13: the whole celebrity status and lifestyle. And not that I'm
• 8:54
  Speaker 13: saying I don't want it now, I don't like it,
• 8:56
  Speaker 13: It's just this is not where I expected it to go.
• 8:58
  Speaker 13: But again, if God needs to use a celebritiness, you know,
• 9:01
  Speaker 13: whether the celebrity status brings me the naysayers or the sayers,
• 9:05
  Speaker 13: whatever it brings, as long as they can get a
• 9:06
  Speaker 13: tip R two that gives them a better quality of
• 9:09
  Speaker 13: life and helps them become better mentally, then run the
• 9:11
  Speaker 13: play with it.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: Now, you talked about your calling, so when it came
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: when it comes to your calling, what is your calling?
• 9:16
  Speaker 3: What do you specialize in? Is it relationships? Is it
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: dealing with people's problems?
• 9:20
  Speaker 6: Is it just listening?
• 9:21
  Speaker 5: What is your specialty when it comes to and what's
• 9:23
  Speaker 5: your calling?
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: I love that?
• 9:24
  Speaker 13: So I started off as a marriage and marriage iman
• 9:26
  Speaker 13: child therapist, and I tell God, I said, listen, I'm
• 9:29
  Speaker 13: a little girl from the hood.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: You know what I come from.
• 9:31
  Speaker 13: Don't put me in the hood, and don't put me
• 9:34
  Speaker 13: with court order DCF kids.
• 9:36
  Speaker 2: Not that I had a problem with them.
• 9:37
  Speaker 13: I didn't want to be triggered dealing with them and
• 9:39
  Speaker 13: I didn't want to have to deal with what I
• 9:40
  Speaker 13: came from. I wasn't in the system, but I came
• 9:43
  Speaker 13: from that type of adversity. And the first place God
• 9:46
  Speaker 13: put me was off of Hotdale and Sloughs and I
• 9:48
  Speaker 13: don't know if you're familiar with LA, but a block
• 9:50
  Speaker 13: away from Sloss and swap.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Meet in the hood and every one of my clients.
• 9:55
  Speaker 13: Were court ordered DCFS Department of Family and Child Services.
• 9:59
  Speaker 13: We had mom in there who were pregnant, still hitting
• 10:02
  Speaker 13: the pipe asking me can I sign off on the
• 10:04
  Speaker 13: documents so they can get the kids back, because I
• 10:07
  Speaker 13: was predicated on their reunification with their kids, and so
• 10:10
  Speaker 13: started off as doing that. When I got my doctor,
• 10:13
  Speaker 13: I transitioned to a psychology expert life coach. My specialty
• 10:16
  Speaker 13: then was marriage faman child therapy, So that is my foundation.
• 10:20
  Speaker 13: So now that I am a psychology expert life coach.
• 10:23
  Speaker 13: I can't get rid of that because that's my foundation.
• 10:26
  Speaker 13: I do psyched on MMSCVT, but I couple it, which
• 10:28
  Speaker 13: is my hybrid approach with coaching. So it's therapy and coaching,
• 10:32
  Speaker 13: which is hybrid. And I say this without humility. That's
• 10:34
  Speaker 13: why I'm so effected because therapy is tell me more,
• 10:37
  Speaker 13: let me hear about your trauma, your daddy issues, to
• 10:39
  Speaker 13: mom issues.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: Why are you who you are? And then once you're
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: finished dealing with that and you process that? Okay, DJ ANDV,
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: what the hell you going from there?
• 10:47
  Speaker 3: I do have one other questions when it comes to
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: the therapy aspect. I'm sure the world has been watching
• 10:51
  Speaker 3: the Mendas brothers, right, And I had a question, right.
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: So the Mendas brothers, if you don't know, they confess
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: their crime to the therapists, and they believed that the
• 11:01
  Speaker 3: therapists could not tell police officers because it was I guess,
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: patient client privilege, but they did. So does that mean
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: anything that I tell a therapist or that anybody tells
• 11:12
  Speaker 3: a therapist can and can possibly be used against them
• 11:15
  Speaker 3: in the court of.
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: Law one hundred percent?
• 11:16
  Speaker 13: So a therapist is only under confidential oath unless you
• 11:20
  Speaker 13: are threatening to kill yourself and someone else, And it
• 11:23
  Speaker 13: can't just be a threat, it has to be you
• 11:25
  Speaker 13: have you actually have like an action plan to do so.
• 11:28
  Speaker 8: Right.
• 11:28
  Speaker 13: You can't just come to me and say, hey, Doc,
• 11:29
  Speaker 13: look you know I want to kill myself. I will
• 11:32
  Speaker 13: help you process through that and hopefully talk you off
• 11:34
  Speaker 13: the ledge. But if you say I got a plan.
• 11:36
  Speaker 13: At nine pm, I'm leaving the house. I'm going to
• 11:37
  Speaker 13: do X, Y and Z to my wife, then I
• 11:39
  Speaker 13: have a duty to report. If I'm subpoenaed to court,
• 11:44
  Speaker 13: I have to speak on that.
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: Can you reach out to the court and say, subpoena
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: me I.
• 11:47
  Speaker 6: Need to be.
• 11:51
  Speaker 13: Would never do that just because I believe in the
• 11:53
  Speaker 13: following the oath of and maybe I just love and
• 11:55
  Speaker 13: respect my clients too much. But if you came to
• 11:57
  Speaker 13: me and said something, I'm just not And I know
• 11:59
  Speaker 13: this is dollars in murder, but I've had married couples
• 12:02
  Speaker 13: who come separately and together and the husband is just
• 12:06
  Speaker 13: lighting it up in his individual sessions, like I'm cheating,
• 12:08
  Speaker 13: I'm intimate with this person and that person is family
• 12:11
  Speaker 13: members is this and I'm and I'm having to just
• 12:13
  Speaker 13: make sure I process my count of transfers, because I'm
• 12:15
  Speaker 13: sitting there like.
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: Damn, and I have her in one hour, in one hour.
• 12:20
  Speaker 8: God.
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Now, of course, if it was like my girlfriend, I'd be.
• 12:23
  Speaker 13: Like butlfriend, because my best friend couldn't be that's that's
• 12:31
  Speaker 13: a complication. She could never come to me as her
• 12:34
  Speaker 13: as a psychology exerting that. But I then I'd be
• 12:36
  Speaker 13: I'd be you know, ripping into in talking to me
• 12:38
  Speaker 13: from the.
• 12:39
  Speaker 4: Human perspective, because you still you're still a real stuff
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: like that. When you hear a guy come in one.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: Hour he's doing X, Y and Z and the woman
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: coming to the next what is going through your mind
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: about to do?
• 12:48
  Speaker 13: You know, in my mind, honestly, what I tried to do,
• 12:51
  Speaker 13: and and and and and some of my clients have
• 12:53
  Speaker 13: followed this guidance. I have one client now, he's he's
• 12:56
  Speaker 13: married and the wife is attempted to divorce him, and
• 12:58
  Speaker 13: she's divorcing him because he cheated, but she doesn't have any.
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: Hard facts on him.
• 13:03
  Speaker 13: So I've actually been able to process with him whether
• 13:07
  Speaker 13: you're going to be with this woman or not, if
• 13:09
  Speaker 13: you want to be with her or you want to be.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: Able to leave and do better.
• 13:11
  Speaker 13: At some point, you got to be able to be
• 13:13
  Speaker 13: real with yourself and real with her, and you got
• 13:14
  Speaker 13: to be transparent. When do you plan on doing that?
• 13:17
  Speaker 13: So he just literally this week or last week, because
• 13:19
  Speaker 13: this week you told me doc. I sat with her
• 13:21
  Speaker 13: and I told her that has been you know a
• 13:23
  Speaker 13: few times that I did cheat. And I said, how
• 13:26
  Speaker 13: does she respond? He said, she said, now we can
• 13:28
  Speaker 13: have a conversation because now you're keeping it real. And
• 13:31
  Speaker 13: when I had her in session, I said, listen, dragered right.
• 13:34
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 13:35
  Speaker 13: When some guys said, look, you have two options, said either,
• 13:38
  Speaker 13: if you're willing to learn to love a dog, we
• 13:40
  Speaker 13: can start that process because you know, or we could
• 13:43
  Speaker 13: start the process of you leaving and starting over. And
• 13:46
  Speaker 13: she goes, what do you mean by a dog? He said,
• 13:48
  Speaker 13: but he didn't. We've been together for ten years.
• 13:49
  Speaker 2: He's never cheated.
• 13:50
  Speaker 13: The first time I said no, no, baby, I said, he'd
• 13:52
  Speaker 13: been quiet for ten years. He decided to bark on
• 13:55
  Speaker 13: your number ten Jesus.
• 13:56
  Speaker 14: So you don't think that he could change in that
• 13:58
  Speaker 14: marriage and not cheat anymore.
• 14:00
  Speaker 13: First of all, nobody changes, including me. We shift, and
• 14:03
  Speaker 13: that changes our life. And when I say we shift,
• 14:05
  Speaker 13: we shift out of the things and behaviors that don't
• 14:07
  Speaker 13: serve us after we learn they're not working, gotcha, And
• 14:10
  Speaker 13: then we have to learn to manage those. So I
• 14:13
  Speaker 13: am very firecrackery. When I was younger, I was very temperamental.
• 14:17
  Speaker 13: I was very you know, who.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Are you talking to? Real quick?
• 14:20
  Speaker 13: I just because of my trauma, because of things, I
• 14:23
  Speaker 13: just had a very protective by all means necessary. I'm
• 14:26
  Speaker 13: an otus of seven, so I was you know, I've
• 14:29
  Speaker 13: like this place up? Is that still in me after
• 14:31
  Speaker 13: all of my healing?
• 14:32
  Speaker 8: Hell?
• 14:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah? Do I manage it? Absolutely?
• 14:35
  Speaker 13: Managing it just means that I'm high function I'm able
• 14:38
  Speaker 13: to regulate my emotion, identify my emotions, don't get into
• 14:41
  Speaker 13: my feelings because emotions are healthy. Feelings cause problems, and
• 14:44
  Speaker 13: I can just say, okay, identify that I'm angry, I'm frustrated.
• 14:47
  Speaker 13: So now let me choose my response. Before I was
• 14:50
  Speaker 13: low functioning. Once I felt it, I was triggered and
• 14:52
  Speaker 13: everybody here was going to know and it was gonna
• 14:54
  Speaker 13: be a problem.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: So does that still come up? Yeah? But do I
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: have self talk that says we're not doing that?
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: So you would never date a man that cheated before
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: because you feel like he will always be a cheated
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: Is that what you're saying.
• 15:05
  Speaker 13: I think that's also circumstantial. So I do believe that
• 15:08
  Speaker 13: different relationships bring out different things in us. I was
• 15:11
  Speaker 13: also in extreme alpha in my first engagement. I had
• 15:13
  Speaker 13: two engagements called off, two weddings my first relationships I
• 15:16
  Speaker 13: was engaged to.
• 15:17
  Speaker 2: I was extreme alpha.
• 15:18
  Speaker 13: So even if he tried to be alpha, I left
• 15:21
  Speaker 13: no space. It was like hell no, by all means necessary,
• 15:24
  Speaker 13: because I said, so you can walk like I'm chasing
• 15:27
  Speaker 13: my career.
• 15:27
  Speaker 2: I know my value. I'm not fatherless. I got a daddy.
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: He spoiled me good day. So even in that, do
• 15:32
  Speaker 2: you feel like that he wasn't man enough for you?
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: Or like, what was that? Do you think that's your fault?
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: Do you look back and be like, ugh, I was
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: trying to be the man, not trying to be the man.
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: But I actually I gave him because you just said
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: you gave no work for him to do it. So
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: do you regret that part of me? That's a duality.
• 15:48
  Speaker 13: I think he chose a woman who was alpha because
• 15:51
  Speaker 13: it fed something in him that was beta. I chose
• 15:54
  Speaker 13: a man who was veda because my alpha needed to
• 15:56
  Speaker 13: be inflamed. But my second engagement, he was alpha. That's
• 16:00
  Speaker 13: why I say its circumstantial. But not only was he alpha,
• 16:02
  Speaker 13: I was ready. I had these submissive fills in me already.
• 16:06
  Speaker 13: So by the time we got in a relationship, I
• 16:08
  Speaker 13: was a hybrid. By then I was alpha submissive, so
• 16:11
  Speaker 13: I was cooking. He was daddy. I was soft. I
• 16:14
  Speaker 13: was in my feminine And the blessing of that is
• 16:17
  Speaker 13: I got to experience both, and I learned that I
• 16:20
  Speaker 13: fell more in love with myself in my softness than
• 16:22
  Speaker 13: he probably did.
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that thing all right.
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: We have more with doctor Shanyenne Bryant when we come back,
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: so don't move.
• 16:28
  Speaker 4: It's the Breakfast Club.
• 16:29
  Speaker 5: Good morning, the Breakfast Club.
• 16:34
  Speaker 3: Warning everybody, It's DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, Charlamagne the God.
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: We are the Breakfast Club. We're still kicking it with
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: doctor Shanyenne Bryant. Of course, she has her show Truth
• 16:43
  Speaker 3: Talks on Fox Soul Monday through Friday, eight pm. She's
• 16:46
  Speaker 3: a psychology expert, a life coach.
• 16:49
  Speaker 5: Jess.
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: So the interview with Cam and also saw that she
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: sat down with Nick. Did they reach out to you
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: or did you reach out to them.
• 16:56
  Speaker 13: So Nick reached out to me and said, Doc, what's up, Like,
• 16:59
  Speaker 13: I want to work through some thing, but I want
• 17:01
  Speaker 13: to work through it on camera. And I said, okay,
• 17:03
  Speaker 13: no problem, but I'm going to penetrate. So we're not
• 17:07
  Speaker 13: doing penetrate.
• 17:13
  Speaker 5: The trigger is crazy, So he likes penetration.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: Nick always goes, Doc, do you have to use that word.
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, I am.
• 17:22
  Speaker 13: I'm penetrating you at the space that obviously is broken and.
• 17:26
  Speaker 11: That the man just don't change, no twelve year old
• 17:38
  Speaker 11: girl right now? Boy definitely President definitely.
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: So when he says all right, I need to work
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: through some things, You're like, okay on camera? Does that
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: then in your mind say is this for real? For real?
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: Or do you want to appeal to a certain market,
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: you know, to a certain audience. You know what I'm saying,
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: great observation.
• 18:00
  Speaker 13: I didn't look at it like that because I look
• 18:02
  Speaker 13: at it like I have a job to do. And
• 18:05
  Speaker 13: so my intent was to use next situation and shift
• 18:10
  Speaker 13: a whole culture of black men saying with cam and
• 18:14
  Speaker 13: it happened. There were a lot of naysayers, but a
• 18:16
  Speaker 13: lot of black men were actually in there creating the
• 18:19
  Speaker 13: vironus and saying listen, Doc is right, we need to
• 18:21
  Speaker 13: create more husbands and less baby daddy. Cam was resistant,
• 18:24
  Speaker 13: but Cam had answered a lot of questions in his household.
• 18:27
  Speaker 13: Cam had a lot of stuff, He had a lot
• 18:29
  Speaker 13: of different conversations he had to have with that woman.
• 18:31
  Speaker 6: Y Ca.
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: Cam said that you know, it affected his relationship with
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: his first two baby moms and his current situation that no, yeah, because.
• 18:41
  Speaker 13: I'm here to interrupt that past No, yeah, like it
• 18:44
  Speaker 13: should have been interrupted a long time, a long time.
• 18:46
  Speaker 13: You know, Cam, and you come from and not that
• 18:48
  Speaker 13: this breeds good decision making people, but Cam comes from
• 18:52
  Speaker 13: He's a pastor's child. He comes from two parents that
• 18:55
  Speaker 13: are still married and they're still very their pastors, very
• 18:57
  Speaker 13: much involved with the church that goes to show you,
• 19:00
  Speaker 13: like the Bible said, it was good for me that
• 19:03
  Speaker 13: I was afflicted because you got people who come from brokenness.
• 19:06
  Speaker 13: This is why I said, these kids are not doomed
• 19:08
  Speaker 13: who make different decisions because it's not about where.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: A lot of times it's not.
• 19:12
  Speaker 13: Where you go, and they gets you where you where
• 19:13
  Speaker 13: you're going, it's where you trying to get the hell
• 19:15
  Speaker 13: away from. And a lot of times parents, Yeah, like
• 19:18
  Speaker 13: I was telling Rayja this. Ray J is my client
• 19:21
  Speaker 13: as well, Jesus. And I was telling ray I said,
• 19:25
  Speaker 13: ray I love your parents. They showed you everything to
• 19:28
  Speaker 13: do right, they didn't show you what not to do
• 19:31
  Speaker 13: and see. For me, I had a circumstances an environment
• 19:33
  Speaker 13: that showed me everything not to do. So sometimes knowing
• 19:38
  Speaker 13: what not to do saves you from doing the wrong.
• 19:41
  Speaker 2: I was just going to ask, how do you deal
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: with your other clients if you have ray J, I do,
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I have that.
• 19:51
  Speaker 13: I have wise counsel Yeah, yeah, yeah, I have a
• 19:54
  Speaker 13: nice group, a nice, really healthy ecosystem of people who
• 19:57
  Speaker 13: are in you know, counselors and coaches, and who are not.
• 20:00
  Speaker 5: What do you say? What do you say to people
• 20:02
  Speaker 5: that say, you know?
• 20:02
  Speaker 3: How do you give advice on marriages and marriage couples
• 20:06
  Speaker 3: when you're not married?
• 20:07
  Speaker 6: That was what do you say to those people?
• 20:08
  Speaker 13: I love that, I say that I don't want to
• 20:10
  Speaker 13: hear you've been together fifteen years of miserable thirteen. I
• 20:13
  Speaker 13: rather take advice from a single woman or man who's happy, thriving, successful,
• 20:17
  Speaker 13: meaning in their joy, not just in their monetary value,
• 20:20
  Speaker 13: then someone who is miserable in the marriage with a
• 20:22
  Speaker 13: side dude in a side check, and you want to
• 20:24
  Speaker 13: give an advice that you give yourself that you're using
• 20:26
  Speaker 13: your failed marriage.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: I'll pass better, all pass, all pass.
• 20:29
  Speaker 13: And what happens is married people like to shun on
• 20:31
  Speaker 13: single folks. The Bible also says single people are happy
• 20:34
  Speaker 13: people that look that up. It says marriage la discipline. No,
• 20:41
  Speaker 13: it says marriage take discipline.
• 20:43
  Speaker 3: And a lot of times they say that you reach
• 20:45
  Speaker 3: out to older couples that's been married longer because they'll
• 20:48
  Speaker 3: tell you how to deal with the marriage than people.
• 20:51
  Speaker 3: You know, like some people say, don't you said, don't
• 20:53
  Speaker 3: you know with your single friends, you talk to married
• 20:54
  Speaker 3: couples that's been in that situation.
• 20:56
  Speaker 13: And you know why that's true because folks who have
• 20:59
  Speaker 13: been marriaging fifty twin years, they've been through the trenches.
• 21:01
  Speaker 13: So they're not gonna teach you how to be happy.
• 21:04
  Speaker 13: We got that single sist, We got that. I've had
• 21:06
  Speaker 13: that all my life. They're gonna teach you how to
• 21:08
  Speaker 13: get through the times when you ain't happy. Y'all, married,
• 21:11
  Speaker 13: you know that, let's not play this game.
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: You married, you know that.
• 21:14
  Speaker 5: You think people get married too early.
• 21:15
  Speaker 13: I think people choose the wrong people. I think people
• 21:18
  Speaker 13: choose their fairyitar ideology, they're not choosing the person. See,
• 21:22
  Speaker 13: people are choosing marriage and not a husband. They're choosing
• 21:25
  Speaker 13: marriage and not a wife. And so when you're choosing marriage,
• 21:28
  Speaker 13: you get the title, you get the looks of it,
• 21:30
  Speaker 13: but you're not getting a person.
• 21:31
  Speaker 2: So you're a beautiful house who's homeless.
• 21:33
  Speaker 4: You're like the idea of.
• 21:34
  Speaker 2: The idea, the idea.
• 21:36
  Speaker 13: And those are people who are fatherless sometimes motherless, who
• 21:40
  Speaker 13: just need something to be a part of. I just
• 21:43
  Speaker 13: need this companionship. I want the title. I don't feel value,
• 21:45
  Speaker 13: I don't for validated. So because we're married, I got
• 21:48
  Speaker 13: somebody who's checking from me. I got somebody who can
• 21:49
  Speaker 13: get me through the day. But you got to be
• 21:51
  Speaker 13: able to check even in marriage.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: I was engaged for ten years, you know, because I
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: kept calling it off, calling it off.
• 21:56
  Speaker 13: And he was like, you keep getting these degrees. You
• 21:58
  Speaker 13: keep saying, wait for the next degree, where get married?
• 22:00
  Speaker 13: And my time I want to get my doctor. He's like, baby,
• 22:02
  Speaker 13: you done.
• 22:02
  Speaker 2: Got four degrees. Yeah, engage, you know, And I.
• 22:05
  Speaker 13: Can't putting it off because I knew that that wasn't
• 22:07
  Speaker 13: my person. And I ended up leaving. I ended up
• 22:13
  Speaker 13: leaving him, you know, unfortunate for him for gun ten years.
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: And she said he was a great guy, great guy.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: He was a great guy. He just wasn't my guy, right,
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: And so.
• 22:23
  Speaker 3: For ten years he thought he was the guy you
• 22:24
  Speaker 3: scro along for ten years.
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: Why you let him go be great with somebody else
• 22:26
  Speaker 4: that would appreciate him and love him.
• 22:28
  Speaker 13: So I'm not saying for ten years, I knew he
• 22:30
  Speaker 13: wasn't the one. When we got about your number five
• 22:32
  Speaker 13: or six, and I've seen that his work ethic and
• 22:34
  Speaker 13: his ability to provide at the level that I wanted
• 22:38
  Speaker 13: our family to be at, I knew that he wasn't mine,
• 22:42
  Speaker 13: my guy. And when I say provide, I'm not talking
• 22:44
  Speaker 13: about like he was making six figures and I was like,
• 22:46
  Speaker 13: now make millions.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: I'm saying. His thing was, baby, I'm cool with me.
• 22:49
  Speaker 13: You a dog in a one baite in my apartment
• 22:51
  Speaker 13: and just no work at all. So for the first
• 22:54
  Speaker 13: six years, I thought, while I'm out here getting it,
• 22:56
  Speaker 13: I have a legal company, you know, I own property.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: I'm only twenty two and all.
• 23:00
  Speaker 13: These college degrees. How can he not be inspired by me? See,
• 23:02
  Speaker 13: that's that age appropriate young woman.
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: He got potential. Let me stay. That's why people should
• 23:07
  Speaker 2: take their time.
• 23:08
  Speaker 13: When I seen you number seven and eight, this guy
• 23:09
  Speaker 13: was the same guy who was I hate talking because
• 23:12
  Speaker 13: he's such a good guy. I was protecting when I
• 23:13
  Speaker 13: talk about him. But where he was lazy and had
• 23:15
  Speaker 13: no work ethic, I had a pivot.
• 23:17
  Speaker 6: Did he acquire more in the future.
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: No, he's still in the same place, So I made
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: the right decision.
• 23:22
  Speaker 3: We have more with doctor Shyenne Briant when we come back.
• 23:25
  Speaker 5: Don't move.
• 23:25
  Speaker 4: It's the Breakfast Club.
• 23:26
  Speaker 5: Good morning, what.
• 23:27
  Speaker 3: Everybody your dj MV Jess hilarious, Charlamagne the guy.
• 23:31
  Speaker 5: We are the Breakfast Club.
• 23:32
  Speaker 3: We're still kicking it with doctor Chanyenne Bryant, psychology expert,
• 23:35
  Speaker 3: life coach. You know she has her show Truth Talks
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: on Fox Soul. Now I want to ask you about
• 23:40
  Speaker 3: some internet rumors that I see. You know, Corey hol
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: Comes said some things about you about not having your
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: degree and where you started off as a I guess
• 23:48
  Speaker 3: working in the strip club.
• 23:49
  Speaker 5: Is any of that stuff?
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: You said, you're not a real doctor.
• 23:50
  Speaker 5: He said, yeah, you're not a real doctor.
• 23:52
  Speaker 13: No, So I have four degrees. Three are in psychology,
• 23:55
  Speaker 13: ones and Pan African studies. My doctor degree is in
• 23:57
  Speaker 13: counseling psychology. My master's the marriage I mean YID therapy.
• 24:00
  Speaker 13: All degrees are in psychology.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: Where this Corey Holcom thing comes from, is we did.
• 24:04
  Speaker 13: I was on a show ten years ago when I
• 24:07
  Speaker 13: actually I think it was before even had my doctor degree.
• 24:10
  Speaker 13: And Corey is used to being able to be very
• 24:12
  Speaker 13: disrespectful to woman and doing things.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: He was a guest on the show. I was co hosted.
• 24:18
  Speaker 13: He was a guest, and I drill dis asked to
• 24:21
  Speaker 13: be honest, it's on YouTube, people, could you know look
• 24:24
  Speaker 13: at it? And I cut into him and I said,
• 24:26
  Speaker 13: you seem like you are inferior to white man, and
• 24:28
  Speaker 13: you seem like you got daddy issues, and you seem
• 24:30
  Speaker 13: like you got mommy issues. You got kids that don't
• 24:33
  Speaker 13: even talk to you or respect you, they don't like you.
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: It tell us a lot about your character.
• 24:36
  Speaker 13: This was ten years ago, okay, And obviously he's still
• 24:39
  Speaker 13: in his feminine because he's still holding a grudge over it.
• 24:41
  Speaker 13: You know, this is like interviews or interviews, so you're
• 24:43
  Speaker 13: saying you do them and you move on to the next.
• 24:45
  Speaker 13: And so was very upset and I feel like that
• 24:48
  Speaker 13: in that space he was, y'all could watch it. He
• 24:51
  Speaker 13: was done, found it Like usually he comes back with
• 24:53
  Speaker 13: the you know, f you b or he has something
• 24:55
  Speaker 13: to say.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: That Corey is just a broken person, period, and I
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: do feel like you'll need help. He needs help.
• 25:01
  Speaker 13: Corys off camera if Corey came again and said, doc,
• 25:03
  Speaker 13: let's do off camera sessions if he wants to do
• 25:07
  Speaker 13: it on camera, because it's just gonna be a rhetoric.
• 25:10
  Speaker 13: I'm not doing that to help his career. I will
• 25:12
  Speaker 13: help him as a man, but I'm not here to
• 25:15
  Speaker 13: help him in his career. That's his job. I'm not
• 25:18
  Speaker 13: here to carry a man that ain't minds or float
• 25:20
  Speaker 13: a man that ain't mind, but to help you with
• 25:21
  Speaker 13: your mental health or help you as a person. He's
• 25:24
  Speaker 13: an alcoholic, he drinks a lot. You know, he's he's
• 25:27
  Speaker 13: over compensating. Those areas, those are places he needs help with.
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: Did you guys see.
• 25:31
  Speaker 13: What he looks like on Cam Newton interview. I'm not
• 25:33
  Speaker 13: talking about looks many attractiveness. Do you see how unwell hygienically.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Clean he looks?
• 25:42
  Speaker 3: Say why no?
• 25:42
  Speaker 13: This ties into mental health? That man's hygiene was on
• 25:45
  Speaker 13: negative two hundred. What I'm saying is he needs deeper
• 25:48
  Speaker 13: help than me coming on fifty one fifty to bring
• 25:52
  Speaker 13: him a bigger audience. He can seal do fifty one fifty,
• 25:54
  Speaker 13: but he needs to be able to fifty one fifty
• 25:56
  Speaker 13: himself and get the help that he needs.
• 25:58
  Speaker 14: Lord, I saw you said too that you comment on
• 26:02
  Speaker 14: the fact that Kamala didn't come out the first night
• 26:04
  Speaker 14: when she didn't win. Speak to that and speak to
• 26:07
  Speaker 14: the comment because we were upset.
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: About Oh yeah, another unpopular opinion. I don't care.
• 26:13
  Speaker 11: She proved why the people.
• 26:15
  Speaker 13: Men and women who are not ready for a woman
• 26:18
  Speaker 13: president are not ready for a woman president because society
• 26:22
  Speaker 13: and some men not all, deem women as emotionally unstable
• 26:26
  Speaker 13: and unable to regulate our emotions when you knew you.
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: Weren't winning or weren't in the lead.
• 26:31
  Speaker 13: And these kids, these babies, these adults were at a
• 26:33
  Speaker 13: historical black university that you went to, Howard waiting hours
• 26:37
  Speaker 13: for you. They had volunteered, I'm sure they had to contributed,
• 26:40
  Speaker 13: and they probably voted for you and supported you this
• 26:42
  Speaker 13: entire time. You couldn't come out and address the people
• 26:46
  Speaker 13: who supported you. That's proven to the people who don't
• 26:49
  Speaker 13: believe women could lead at that level, that a woman
• 26:52
  Speaker 13: can't regulate her emotions enough to come out and take
• 26:54
  Speaker 13: an ail.
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: I don't care if she would have came out in tears. Listen,
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: I'm sorry we lost. Whatever that looks like.
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: I'll give a little pushback on that, because Donald Trump
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: never gave a concession speech, nor would he even admit
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: that he lost.
• 27:06
  Speaker 13: But we're talking about Trump who runs on being that
• 27:09
  Speaker 13: type of person, so his people never expected that. Just
• 27:13
  Speaker 13: like when someone says, well, Trump's a racist, he's running
• 27:17
  Speaker 13: on that.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: Trump is talking about getting rid of the U d I.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: He has said that.
• 27:24
  Speaker 13: Kamala came out and showed us all this love and support.
• 27:28
  Speaker 13: But when you took the l not only did you
• 27:30
  Speaker 13: not come out, you sent a man to come out
• 27:33
  Speaker 13: and address these people.
• 27:35
  Speaker 2: He was fine too. You didn't even send another woman
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: or black woman. This was a woman's moment.
• 27:40
  Speaker 13: And in my opinion, that all that did was tell
• 27:44
  Speaker 13: the folks who said women can't lead, see she sent
• 27:47
  Speaker 13: a man out to do it and then came out
• 27:49
  Speaker 13: the next day. That's not leadership.
• 27:51
  Speaker 15: To me.
• 27:52
  Speaker 13: Leadership is commitment, and commitment is doing what you said
• 27:55
  Speaker 13: you would doue regards of how you feel. I don't
• 27:57
  Speaker 13: care how you felt, Kamala, come out and address us.
• 27:59
  Speaker 13: Those kids left what they had down. They weren't sad
• 28:02
  Speaker 13: just because she lost. They were sad because they were
• 28:04
  Speaker 13: looking for who was still their leader, whether she lost
• 28:06
  Speaker 13: or not. To come out and address those kids.
• 28:09
  Speaker 3: I was going to ask, what was the last time
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: you apologize or last time you were wrong about something
• 28:12
  Speaker 3: you remember?
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: Good question?
• 28:15
  Speaker 3: It probably probably.
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: It probably was to my best friend Lola and my assistant.
• 28:21
  Speaker 13: We work so closely together. We're always together because I'm
• 28:25
  Speaker 13: so comfortable with her. She gets all of my moving
• 28:28
  Speaker 13: part to be honest with What about to a man
• 28:30
  Speaker 13: that you're dating.
• 28:32
  Speaker 5: Didn't get an apology?
• 28:34
  Speaker 14: I actually got to know because you you are very
• 28:36
  Speaker 14: strong in opinion and stuff like that. And I think
• 28:38
  Speaker 14: men think that women that are structured like you don't
• 28:41
  Speaker 14: know how to be accountable and don't know how to apologize.
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: I'm very accountable.
• 28:44
  Speaker 13: I do apologize, And that's why I said, I want
• 28:47
  Speaker 13: a man who will say with respect and me, he
• 28:50
  Speaker 13: ain't about to just dominate, like shut your ass up
• 28:53
  Speaker 13: to you know, he could be disrespectful, but I want
• 28:54
  Speaker 13: a man who's like, hold on, you're out of pocket
• 28:56
  Speaker 13: right now. You know, like, we don't do that. This
• 28:59
  Speaker 13: is not what we do. And I like you strong,
• 29:02
  Speaker 13: but this is not strong. This is disrespectful, baby. But
• 29:05
  Speaker 13: I want him to be able to know how to
• 29:07
  Speaker 13: say it, and then I will be like, you know,
• 29:08
  Speaker 13: even if it's not in that moment, I can process
• 29:11
  Speaker 13: and be like, you know what, you're right, and I do.
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: I will apologize.
• 29:14
  Speaker 13: I will come to myself because I have the discipline
• 29:17
  Speaker 13: of that self talk of saying stock you know, or
• 29:19
  Speaker 13: I will say, listen, you've already apologized. You've done everything
• 29:22
  Speaker 13: you could right now. It's not a youth problem. I'm
• 29:24
  Speaker 13: still trying to get out of my ego. So just
• 29:27
  Speaker 13: give me thirty minutes, because baby, you've apologized, like you've.
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: Done your job. And then I come around in twenty
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: thirty minutes and I'm like, okay, I'm back and I'm
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: sorry too.
• 29:35
  Speaker 4: That's awareness, that's kind of ability.
• 29:37
  Speaker 8: Sorry.
• 29:37
  Speaker 13: And the thing is when you really want peace, and
• 29:40
  Speaker 13: that's the thing about being single for so long, though.
• 29:42
  Speaker 11: You can, yes, you find it, you figure it out.
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: You find a piece and enjoy that.
• 29:47
  Speaker 11: You do get in a relationship, you gotta make sense.
• 29:49
  Speaker 13: And when you do get a relationship though, you're really
• 29:51
  Speaker 13: saying let's dead this let's deadness argument.
• 29:53
  Speaker 14: Yes, have you ever got afraid that you're going to
• 29:55
  Speaker 14: get so used to that piece that you're not gonna
• 29:56
  Speaker 14: want to do nothing? Because I tell myself the all
• 29:58
  Speaker 14: the time, like I'm in such a good state, I
• 30:00
  Speaker 14: don't want nothing to bother me.
• 30:05
  Speaker 13: No, because I have been I have been serial dating
• 30:09
  Speaker 13: for the six years I've been single. So when I
• 30:10
  Speaker 13: say single, it means I haven't.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: Been committed but committed.
• 30:13
  Speaker 13: But have I had like three months six months relationships
• 30:15
  Speaker 13: that went that long season A word exclusive and we're
• 30:17
  Speaker 13: committed in that season Because I am very into exclusivity.
• 30:21
  Speaker 13: I don't like casual sex, and so I will accidentally
• 30:23
  Speaker 13: go a year, year and a half Cellivan because I
• 30:26
  Speaker 13: don't like the casualty of sex. And when I decide to,
• 30:29
  Speaker 13: I would choose that one person to be around for
• 30:32
  Speaker 13: the long term. Well when does that decision happen for you? Now,
• 30:35
  Speaker 13: I'm in my choosing stage, so it's gonna happen now
• 30:37
  Speaker 13: like soon. I'm in my choosing stage.
• 30:39
  Speaker 2: But but I'm not.
• 30:40
  Speaker 13: I'm not desperate, so it's not like again, I'm not
• 30:43
  Speaker 13: choosing just a high valued man. I would even take
• 30:46
  Speaker 13: a man who's a little less value, meaning a little
• 30:48
  Speaker 13: less income money. But I just love this man. He's
• 30:53
  Speaker 13: my person, right, so yeah, yeah, I mean he could. Yeah,
• 30:56
  Speaker 13: so I would, And I would regular rather have a
• 30:58
  Speaker 13: regular man who isn't in the limelight, who we both
• 31:02
  Speaker 13: don't have to straddle this this whole industry thing, and
• 31:05
  Speaker 13: he can go run a business or go be a
• 31:07
  Speaker 13: corporate guy. He can come to my shows and we
• 31:09
  Speaker 13: can go home and have intellectual pillow talk. I can
• 31:13
  Speaker 13: go home and put my hair in a in a
• 31:14
  Speaker 13: bird's nest and walk around with sweats and a tank
• 31:17
  Speaker 13: top and no brawl.
• 31:20
  Speaker 3: He is always.
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: You know what, So you got the show truth Talks.
• 31:29
  Speaker 13: I do Truth Talks before we get out of here.
• 31:34
  Speaker 13: Truth Talks is my new talk show. It's on Fox.
• 31:36
  Speaker 13: It's Monday through Friday, eight weeks.
• 31:42
  Speaker 5: Not at all.
• 31:44
  Speaker 13: Sometimes the producers are like, Doc, you know, give the
• 31:47
  Speaker 13: other co hole time to talk. I'm like, I'm like,
• 31:50
  Speaker 13: I gotta do that. But it's coolcause we're pretty much.
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: We're a global news.
• 31:54
  Speaker 13: We're a CNN that gives you the black voice, the
• 31:57
  Speaker 13: black perspective and we're.
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: Bringing truth to everything news with culture twist to it.
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: So we're every night a PM frime time.
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: Love that.
• 32:06
  Speaker 13: Yeah, follow follow me on Underscore, Doctor Brian on Instagram,
• 32:12
  Speaker 13: social media, or you can go to doctor Brian dot
• 32:14
  Speaker 13: com and that's doctor Brian dot coeo not dot com
• 32:17
  Speaker 13: and then I'm on my speaking to our Yeah, that's.
• 32:19
  Speaker 5: Doctor and Brian.
• 32:20
  Speaker 3: We appreciate you, you have thank you'll having me.
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, thank you, The Breakfast Club.
• 32:30
  Speaker 3: Good morning everybody. It's DJ n V Jess Hilarious, Charlamage
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: the guy. We are the Breakfast Club. Jess is on
• 32:36
  Speaker 3: maternity leaves a lawns filling in and we got a
• 32:38
  Speaker 3: special guest in the ability.
• 32:40
  Speaker 6: It's going down Wallow. Listen, man, welcome to the Breakfast
• 32:44
  Speaker 6: Club this morning, presented to you by million dollars worth
• 32:46
  Speaker 6: a game. Listen, man, we didn't board to the company. Man,
• 32:48
  Speaker 6: it's as good. It's going down man, We're doing it
• 32:51
  Speaker 6: big now. Man, I'm my brother right here. I'm so
• 32:53
  Speaker 6: proud of you. Listen, man, listen, I want to give
• 32:55
  Speaker 6: you before I start. I gotta give you your flowers
• 32:57
  Speaker 6: because you've been man, you me and you had something.
• 33:00
  Speaker 6: Phone calls. We had a thousand phone calls. A couple
• 33:03
  Speaker 6: of years ago. You hit me up. He was like, Wowow,
• 33:05
  Speaker 6: you need a book. This is years ago and you
• 33:06
  Speaker 6: was talking about how you and keV was talking about
• 33:08
  Speaker 6: you and Kevin Hart was talking about the man Wallow
• 33:10
  Speaker 6: would be crazy on the audio book, which I did
• 33:13
  Speaker 6: my own audio book. Shout out to you know, shout
• 33:16
  Speaker 6: out the Yana Van's aunt also who did the audio.
• 33:18
  Speaker 6: She did the forward for me. Shout out to thirteen A,
• 33:21
  Speaker 6: my publisher, man for you know, yes, for making it
• 33:24
  Speaker 6: happen Simon and Schuster. But we're here now. You told me.
• 33:27
  Speaker 6: You keep telling me about the book of your book,
• 33:29
  Speaker 6: the book change your life. That's right. And the book,
• 33:32
  Speaker 6: the book, that's all you kept saying. And now we
• 33:33
  Speaker 6: hear it. Man, all will good attentions is game changed.
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: The book title is perfect for you because there's not
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: too many people on this planet who come with good
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: intentions like.
• 33:42
  Speaker 6: Wallow does appreciate that.
• 33:43
  Speaker 4: When did you develop that mentality?
• 33:45
  Speaker 6: I don't know, Man. I was on the street corners,
• 33:46
  Speaker 6: I was, I was, I had good intentions on the
• 33:48
  Speaker 6: street corners. I just wanted to still American dream, and
• 33:50
  Speaker 6: I said, man, it's too slow. The only people that
• 33:53
  Speaker 6: got respected my neighborhood was successful criminals. So even though
• 33:55
  Speaker 6: I was a good person growing up, my grandma raised me,
• 33:58
  Speaker 6: well my mom, you know, you know, I was like,
• 33:59
  Speaker 6: I got to figure this out. So I said, I
• 34:01
  Speaker 6: got to I got man. The only people they respect
• 34:03
  Speaker 6: out is the people that's winning by any means. And
• 34:06
  Speaker 6: then even in America, I was like, damn, hold up, America.
• 34:08
  Speaker 6: They only respected Scarface, they only respect the Godfather. They
• 34:11
  Speaker 6: don't respect nobody else. I gotta go get some money.
• 34:14
  Speaker 6: So even though my heart was good, I had to
• 34:16
  Speaker 6: go figure it out. And that led me to prison
• 34:17
  Speaker 6: most of my life. And and but you know, even
• 34:20
  Speaker 6: in their prison thirteen years right twenty twenty, I did
• 34:23
  Speaker 6: twenty penitentiary five years, and then out the juvenile system.
• 34:27
  Speaker 6: And even in that, I remember, you know, oh here said,
• 34:30
  Speaker 6: all I did was laughing jail and just do what
• 34:32
  Speaker 6: I needed to do, educate myself because I realized that,
• 34:34
  Speaker 6: and to the point where somebody said I was one
• 34:36
  Speaker 6: of the nicest dude in prison because I knew why
• 34:39
  Speaker 6: I was there. I did mine so I was accountable
• 34:41
  Speaker 6: for my books. So, you know, and that helped me
• 34:43
  Speaker 6: change and develop into what I become today. You know,
• 34:45
  Speaker 6: I'm just happy to be here and I and I
• 34:48
  Speaker 6: try my best this year all the knowledge that I got,
• 34:50
  Speaker 6: as you know, with our people to show let's listen,
• 34:53
  Speaker 6: we're bigger than what y'all think we are. Because I
• 34:55
  Speaker 6: always say this, and it's crazy to me. It's like,
• 34:57
  Speaker 6: you know, back in the day, we didn't have nothing,
• 34:58
  Speaker 6: but we had everything because we had at each other
• 35:01
  Speaker 6: and that was important. And it's like it seemed like
• 35:03
  Speaker 6: now we find so many reasons not to deal with
• 35:05
  Speaker 6: each other, and it's like, God, damn, who you working for?
• 35:11
  Speaker 6: Like you go on social media, it's like who you're
• 35:13
  Speaker 6: working for? But I had to realize something a lot
• 35:15
  Speaker 6: of us don't want to look in that mirror and
• 35:16
  Speaker 6: deal with it. I don't hate envy because of his money,
• 35:19
  Speaker 6: his cars, his family's marriage. I hate envy because m
• 35:22
  Speaker 6: be getting love for doing something that I always wanted
• 35:25
  Speaker 6: to do, but I ain't have enough heart to go
• 35:26
  Speaker 6: out here and do it. Well. No, I'm not talking
• 35:29
  Speaker 6: about that. I'm just talking about the gentlemen. Yeah, he
• 35:31
  Speaker 6: do got that, Beijing, But I'm just saying, like shut
• 35:33
  Speaker 6: up to Beijing, give me deals, but but like this
• 35:35
  Speaker 6: and therapists, damn, okay, you better be paying you the
• 35:38
  Speaker 6: way you need. But what I'm saying is like that's
• 35:43
  Speaker 6: how culture became. It became like this in social media media.
• 35:46
  Speaker 6: Like a lot of people got to look in the
• 35:47
  Speaker 6: mirror and say, damn, I didn't materialize my dreams. And
• 35:50
  Speaker 6: that's the hardest thing to do, is you know. So
• 35:53
  Speaker 6: it's more easy to say Charlemagne the sucker, envy this, lord, this,
• 35:56
  Speaker 6: just this. It's much more easy to say it than
• 35:58
  Speaker 6: to say, let me get off my ass, and we're
• 36:00
  Speaker 6: here to do something with my life. So but it's
• 36:02
  Speaker 6: just it's just sad out here. When you see it now,
• 36:04
  Speaker 6: it's like we just I don't know, man, and all
• 36:06
  Speaker 6: we ever had was each other. That's the only way
• 36:08
  Speaker 6: we ever made it in life.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: You said in the book, you said it's actually in
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: the chapter Arm of Good Intentions, you said you screamed
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: out one day and you made it a daily reminder
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: that nobody will save you.
• 36:17
  Speaker 6: Nobody. Especially when I was in prison, I'm like, we
• 36:20
  Speaker 6: complain in the we doing I'm like, yo, bro, we
• 36:21
  Speaker 6: inside these white folks spot ain't nobody coming. Like if
• 36:25
  Speaker 6: they go off anything else, we're gonna be locked in
• 36:27
  Speaker 6: these selves. Ain't nobody coming, But that's the same thing
• 36:29
  Speaker 6: in the ghetto. Ain't nobody never come and save nobody?
• 36:32
  Speaker 6: Who saves her?
• 36:33
  Speaker 5: What was the change for you? What was because you
• 36:34
  Speaker 5: said you were in and out? What was the change?
• 36:35
  Speaker 6: You said?
• 36:36
  Speaker 5: I gotta get this right and I gotta change myself.
• 36:39
  Speaker 6: Like to be realistic, man, I got tired of being
• 36:41
  Speaker 6: in jail with a bunchet. You see what I'm saying.
• 36:42
  Speaker 6: I wanted to take a butt nugga shower, you know
• 36:43
  Speaker 6: what I mean. I couldn't do that. I wanted to
• 36:45
  Speaker 6: slip neked in the bed. I couldn't do that because
• 36:46
  Speaker 6: I'm in the SEC. Gotta sell you. I don't know
• 36:48
  Speaker 6: if he might wake up in the middle of night
• 36:49
  Speaker 6: and be like, yo, man, let me I need parts
• 36:51
  Speaker 6: of that, like what we're doing. Yeah, straight up. He
• 36:55
  Speaker 6: might wake up in the middle of night and be like, hey,
• 36:57
  Speaker 6: my man, let's let's figure something out, you know what
• 37:00
  Speaker 6: I mean. So I don't know. I'm just being real
• 37:02
  Speaker 6: because listen, you know what's crazy. I think one of
• 37:04
  Speaker 6: the reasons I maade it through jail, so smoothly because
• 37:06
  Speaker 6: I was always a comedian doing a low you know
• 37:09
  Speaker 6: what I'm saying. I was always funny. They was like, hey,
• 37:10
  Speaker 6: because I was in there scared to death. You know
• 37:12
  Speaker 6: how dudes come on from jail. I'll be trying to
• 37:14
  Speaker 6: wonder that I did all this time in jail. I'll
• 37:15
  Speaker 6: be like, what program was you on that you wasn't
• 37:17
  Speaker 6: scared in jail? That you was just so tough because
• 37:19
  Speaker 6: I was scared to death? Soon would they listen? As
• 37:21
  Speaker 6: soon as that judge gave me them numbers and they
• 37:23
  Speaker 6: you know you SHO had your thing together? Nothing mean,
• 37:26
  Speaker 6: say my little words back before you see them. It's
• 37:28
  Speaker 6: back and forth. Word player I had with the judge
• 37:30
  Speaker 6: is that he'a be back on walked in the joint,
• 37:32
  Speaker 6: you know what I mean? Now you got to do
• 37:33
  Speaker 6: the walk back in because now you're going back into
• 37:35
  Speaker 6: the cages where everybody looking at you when you come down.
• 37:37
  Speaker 6: What they give you with it about nothing. Man, It
• 37:39
  Speaker 6: gain't me a little twenty minutes by the time I
• 37:41
  Speaker 6: get to my cell later on that I threw that
• 37:43
  Speaker 6: tie up, crying like a baby man for a new boy. Damn.
• 37:46
  Speaker 6: Then and then once you the shackles hit you box
• 37:49
  Speaker 6: like an animal, the shackles going from your arm to
• 37:51
  Speaker 6: your feet. You get upstate, you hit that penitentiary yard
• 37:54
  Speaker 6: and you like, my mom, man, I know it was
• 37:57
  Speaker 6: like this. I'm seeing people with knights longer than the
• 37:59
  Speaker 6: giraft trump you. I was. I was. I went to
• 38:02
  Speaker 6: the penitential when I was seventeen, but I hit the
• 38:03
  Speaker 6: big prison yard when I turned eighteen. I was in
• 38:05
  Speaker 6: Dallas Penitentiary in Pennsylvania, and uh, that was that was
• 38:09
  Speaker 6: a different type of Joe. Man. I'm seeing people get
• 38:10
  Speaker 6: married in the yard and all that. I'm like, I
• 38:12
  Speaker 6: ain't trying to be nobody wife. I ain't signed up
• 38:14
  Speaker 6: for this, so I'm I'm looking.
• 38:17
  Speaker 5: Like married in the yard.
• 38:18
  Speaker 6: You know, people was getting married in the yard. I said,
• 38:20
  Speaker 6: damn man, though it was real weddings like it wasn't though,
• 38:25
  Speaker 6: like if you got the Bible when you got somebody
• 38:27
  Speaker 6: that's officially like you were just.
• 38:29
  Speaker 5: In the yard.
• 38:30
  Speaker 6: I was walking the yard.
• 38:30
  Speaker 11: I was, you know, I wasn't a guest.
• 38:34
  Speaker 6: I was in the backdround because I was walking in
• 38:35
  Speaker 6: the yard. So I'm like, I'm sitting there and I'm like,
• 38:37
  Speaker 6: I ain't trying to get married in the yard man, damn.
• 38:40
  Speaker 6: And then I'm seeing people getting stabbed in on. I'm like, yo,
• 38:42
  Speaker 6: I'm not trying to So I would go to my
• 38:44
  Speaker 6: seald and be like, Yo, what the going on? I
• 38:46
  Speaker 6: ain't signed up for this because nobody tell you this,
• 38:48
  Speaker 6: because only stories that we hear back in the hood
• 38:50
  Speaker 6: about jail is that you come home and you get
• 38:52
  Speaker 6: rewarded and you get acknowledged and you tough and all
• 38:54
  Speaker 6: this other you get muscles. But I'm like, I'm like, damn,
• 38:57
  Speaker 6: ain't nobody talking about the scary part. So I had
• 38:59
  Speaker 6: to be the one that a scary part to tell
• 39:01
  Speaker 6: a real part because I was scared, especially listen. So
• 39:03
  Speaker 6: I get up to the penitentiary this shower time I
• 39:06
  Speaker 6: go down there, I got my boxes on and all that.
• 39:08
  Speaker 6: So I'm like, damn, we go down there, and this
• 39:09
  Speaker 6: is my first time in a real because I went
• 39:11
  Speaker 6: to the penitentiary when a lot of younger dudes started
• 39:13
  Speaker 6: to go like you was getting certified as adulty created
• 39:16
  Speaker 6: new law, so a long time it was no young
• 39:18
  Speaker 6: boys in the one penitentiary. I went to dollars penitentiaries,
• 39:20
  Speaker 6: mostly old heads, and they had the most lifers in
• 39:23
  Speaker 6: the state of Pennsylvania at this time. So you could
• 39:25
  Speaker 6: be in a cell with anybody. You could do one
• 39:27
  Speaker 6: year of being a cell with a life. It don't matter.
• 39:29
  Speaker 6: So I go, I go to go to the shower.
• 39:31
  Speaker 6: So I got my towel on, my boxes on, and
• 39:33
  Speaker 6: when I went to the shower, right, I go down there,
• 39:35
  Speaker 6: steamed up in everything. This shower is probably maybe fifteen
• 39:39
  Speaker 6: shower heads and the block got one hundred and something
• 39:41
  Speaker 6: dudes on there. So when I go in the shower room,
• 39:45
  Speaker 6: it was like a movie. Like everybody looked at me,
• 39:47
  Speaker 6: like while you got the boxes on? Anybody, I'm telling
• 39:50
  Speaker 6: me it was I'm talking about it was a sword
• 39:51
  Speaker 6: showing that joint man work with. No. No, I'm just
• 39:54
  Speaker 6: like no, it's like that's not normal, like you, and
• 39:57
  Speaker 6: I'm like, you know what, that day I really realized
• 40:00
  Speaker 6: that a shower wasn't important than the bird bath. I said,
• 40:03
  Speaker 6: I could go back to myself and just wash up there.
• 40:05
  Speaker 6: Why would I need what? Why do a shower really
• 40:08
  Speaker 6: mean that.
• 40:08
  Speaker 3: You ain't taking shower your whole time, the whole way.
• 40:11
  Speaker 6: No, I took it for a while till I just
• 40:12
  Speaker 6: you know, went down there and short comfortable because because
• 40:15
  Speaker 6: I had that, I was like, damn, man, like why
• 40:17
  Speaker 6: everybody gotta be naked in this joint?
• 40:19
  Speaker 15: Man?
• 40:20
  Speaker 6: And then they looking at you and then they talking
• 40:22
  Speaker 6: like like they be asked. They talking you see the game?
• 40:25
  Speaker 6: Oh man, what's the name?
• 40:26
  Speaker 5: Went off?
• 40:26
  Speaker 6: Immi Smith. I'm like, man, like we ain't suposed like
• 40:29
  Speaker 6: y'all supposed to be doing it.
• 40:31
  Speaker 14: When did you get like like like comfortable with it?
• 40:34
  Speaker 14: Like your first decade shower were you never got a show?
• 40:42
  Speaker 6: But no, no, I got one when I got to
• 40:44
  Speaker 6: the jail where you get your own booth.
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: Okay, I wasn't trying to be a.
• 40:47
  Speaker 6: Party because it's like it's like a volunteer, like you
• 40:49
  Speaker 6: volunteering something.
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: How long it took to do that?
• 40:51
  Speaker 6: Oh years? It took years. But different jail, different part
• 40:53
  Speaker 6: of the jail got different sections where you get a
• 40:55
  Speaker 6: single shower. So in that jail was jings, we got
• 40:57
  Speaker 6: the single shower locked in. But it was like, man,
• 40:59
  Speaker 6: I always feel like that was the volunteer services, like
• 41:02
  Speaker 6: you was giving imitations to something.
• 41:04
  Speaker 3: So I didn't know, all right, we got more with
• 41:06
  Speaker 3: Wallow when we come back, it's the breakfast club.
• 41:08
  Speaker 5: Good morning.
• 41:08
  Speaker 3: Why Everybody's dj NV, Jess, Hilaris Charlamage, the God we
• 41:12
  Speaker 3: Are the Breakfast Club. Lauryn la Ross was filling in
• 41:15
  Speaker 3: for Jess and we're still kicking it with Wallow. Now,
• 41:17
  Speaker 3: I got a question, what did you realize this is
• 41:19
  Speaker 3: what you wanted to do when you came home and
• 41:21
  Speaker 3: you said you took that drive and you went back
• 41:22
  Speaker 3: to you had the McDonald's with the grandma's house. When
• 41:24
  Speaker 3: did you realize this is what you wanted to do
• 41:26
  Speaker 3: and how you wanted to change for the next generation.
• 41:30
  Speaker 6: I was in a shout out to the life of
• 41:31
  Speaker 6: these Life for Brothers, this organization NWACP, and all the
• 41:35
  Speaker 6: brothers that was in the penitentiary with me, the elders.
• 41:37
  Speaker 6: There's an organization called Real Street Talk. So I'm in
• 41:39
  Speaker 6: there in one of the old OG's brother, Minister Rob,
• 41:42
  Speaker 6: shout out to him. He come to me, said, Wallow,
• 41:43
  Speaker 6: we need you to come down here and talk. It
• 41:45
  Speaker 6: was a bunch of brothers shere, Sharif it was ike
• 41:48
  Speaker 6: a Big Shannon. It was a bunch of brothers that
• 41:50
  Speaker 6: was getting together the talk to the two three hundred
• 41:52
  Speaker 6: inmates a week that was coming in to talk to
• 41:54
  Speaker 6: them about listen while you in jail used as your
• 41:56
  Speaker 6: time to educate yourself. So you go back out there
• 41:58
  Speaker 6: and make something happened with yourself. And it was called
• 41:59
  Speaker 6: real street. So I was one of the dudes that
• 42:01
  Speaker 6: spoke in a way to whereas though they really understood
• 42:04
  Speaker 6: what I was saying because I was like one of
• 42:06
  Speaker 6: the youngest dude. Even though the og spoke too, and
• 42:08
  Speaker 6: I seen it they was listening. They was tapped into it.
• 42:10
  Speaker 6: And it was a brother, brother, Rob Griffin. It was
• 42:12
  Speaker 6: from the used to do security for Malcolm Xican the
• 42:14
  Speaker 6: Nation Islam back in the day. And he came to
• 42:16
  Speaker 6: myself one day and he was like, brother, not too
• 42:18
  Speaker 6: many brothers out here speak, whereas though multiple generations could
• 42:21
  Speaker 6: listen to understand it. And then that like you speak clear,
• 42:24
  Speaker 6: keep doing that. So when I got out, just started
• 42:26
  Speaker 6: grabbed it, grabbed that phone and just start popping it
• 42:28
  Speaker 6: because nobody was doing it, and I knew that I
• 42:30
  Speaker 6: had to do it in a unique way because I
• 42:32
  Speaker 6: was battling on the timeline. I was battling for attention,
• 42:35
  Speaker 6: you know when you go down the time I'm looking
• 42:37
  Speaker 6: at it. I said, okay, I got to battle the girl.
• 42:38
  Speaker 6: This ass naked. I got to battle my man with
• 42:40
  Speaker 6: a pound of jerry On. I got to battle the rapper,
• 42:42
  Speaker 6: the athlete, I said, I got him. That's why you've
• 42:44
  Speaker 6: seen a lot of my videos. In the beginning. I'll
• 42:45
  Speaker 6: be running across the highway eighteen Willer come laying on
• 42:47
  Speaker 6: the ground, catch him on my head. They laughing. But
• 42:49
  Speaker 6: I'm giving you the message as long as you listening.
• 42:51
  Speaker 6: Because what everybody was afraid to tell us, like, yo,
• 42:54
  Speaker 6: you can be great, you amazing, like we build pyramids
• 42:57
  Speaker 6: with no cranes. I don't know what I read it
• 42:59
  Speaker 6: in the gem, I holding, we did you mean to
• 43:00
  Speaker 6: tell me? We came about a slavery. This little lady
• 43:03
  Speaker 6: got us about a slavery. Sister got us about a slavery,
• 43:05
  Speaker 6: and that ingenuity? Hold, what is going on? Frederick Douglass
• 43:08
  Speaker 6: was who he did. What I realized this, if you
• 43:10
  Speaker 6: can make them laugh, you can make them listen. I
• 43:11
  Speaker 6: always love comedy because I used to listen to Paul
• 43:14
  Speaker 6: Moody Richard probably all of my uncle played the records
• 43:17
  Speaker 6: Red Fox, and I'll be laughing, but they'd be saying
• 43:19
  Speaker 6: some deep and they lace it up. So I'm like, okay,
• 43:22
  Speaker 6: I just gotta give it to our people in a
• 43:23
  Speaker 6: different way, because I just couldn't get the whole Harriet
• 43:26
  Speaker 6: Tubman thing to just have me just like yo, there's
• 43:28
  Speaker 6: nothing you can't do. So I just be looking like no,
• 43:31
  Speaker 6: it's just a different way, in a different language you're
• 43:33
  Speaker 6: doing it. And one thing that I'm always doing. You'll
• 43:35
  Speaker 6: never hear me talk down to hate any of our people.
• 43:37
  Speaker 6: You know why never all of our people. They might
• 43:39
  Speaker 6: have a different message. And no matter what you're doing
• 43:41
  Speaker 6: business this that I don't care what you're doing. We
• 43:43
  Speaker 6: don't have to be doing the same thing. And just
• 43:45
  Speaker 6: because we ain't doing the same don't even if we
• 43:47
  Speaker 6: might be doing something a similar wing gotta be mad
• 43:49
  Speaker 6: at each other. I ain't got to hate you, ain't
• 43:50
  Speaker 6: gotta hate me, because at the end of the day,
• 43:52
  Speaker 6: is this really about the uplookment of our people? If
• 43:54
  Speaker 6: it is, how can I go online and say anything
• 43:57
  Speaker 6: bad about our people? If I really care about our people,
• 43:59
  Speaker 6: I can't hear you down to lift them up. Mathematically,
• 44:02
  Speaker 6: it don't work. So what I do is no matter
• 44:04
  Speaker 6: if you say something about me, say somebody, I'm never
• 44:06
  Speaker 6: going to say nothing about nobody because that's not going
• 44:08
  Speaker 6: to add value to the whole plan of us.
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: That's Wallow really like this. I'm not gonna do that
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: even off camera. He's like you the generational curve break
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: or Wallow.
• 44:17
  Speaker 6: That's why I'm that.
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: I'm so glad you put out a book, man, because
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: I need to see you on every platform having these conversations.
• 44:24
  Speaker 6: I want to see you on the view. I want
• 44:25
  Speaker 6: to see you. I'm getting But you know what. You
• 44:27
  Speaker 6: know what's crazy though, and this is why our Brothers
• 44:30
  Speaker 6: Club is a major platform for our culture and will
• 44:32
  Speaker 6: always be. You get it when it's not cool. You
• 44:35
  Speaker 6: get it before it go popular, you get it before
• 44:37
  Speaker 6: it goes shiny. You get it and understand that a
• 44:40
  Speaker 6: lot of these people don't get about it. Even though
• 44:41
  Speaker 6: you name platforms. They don't care about that. They just
• 44:44
  Speaker 6: want some shiny. Now, Willow come out of prison. I'm
• 44:47
  Speaker 6: probably one of the greatest comebacks ever to come out
• 44:49
  Speaker 6: of prison in life. But they not gonna get that
• 44:51
  Speaker 6: to a New York Time bestseller. Here at all that stuff.
• 44:54
  Speaker 6: They don't understand us. And we control cool, but a
• 44:56
  Speaker 6: lot of times we don't own it. So they try
• 44:58
  Speaker 6: to get a close proximity our coolness. And we so
• 45:01
  Speaker 6: much suck as we don't be understanding that we don't
• 45:03
  Speaker 6: even know why when we're being used out here. That's
• 45:06
  Speaker 6: why it's a lot of that I see online. I'll
• 45:08
  Speaker 6: be like, damn, we googies. Can't nobody outside of us
• 45:11
  Speaker 6: validate us but us. I'm never gonna let nobody tell
• 45:16
  Speaker 6: me that you're not cool, that you not cool that
• 45:18
  Speaker 6: outside our culture. And I'm never gonna let nobody give
• 45:21
  Speaker 6: an approval of what's cool and what's not outside of
• 45:23
  Speaker 6: our culture of this blackness. I love being black. I'm
• 45:26
  Speaker 6: a die blackst right. My family is black. I look
• 45:29
  Speaker 6: at us and I say, we some extraordinary people. And
• 45:31
  Speaker 6: it's not taking that enough from any other group of people,
• 45:33
  Speaker 6: but everybody else love themselves. So I'm gonna love me
• 45:35
  Speaker 6: and you know, and I got some extraordinary people that's
• 45:37
  Speaker 6: not black, this family, that's bus. But at the end
• 45:39
  Speaker 6: of the day, until we start loving us on all levels,
• 45:42
  Speaker 6: we're gonna be left behind.
• 45:44
  Speaker 3: What do you think about when when Michael Rubin was
• 45:45
  Speaker 3: up here and said pretty much the same thing that
• 45:47
  Speaker 3: you just said right now, but he just said we
• 45:51
  Speaker 3: heard our.
• 45:54
  Speaker 5: He basically said, our community hurts ourselves.
• 45:56
  Speaker 6: That's what even saying. Let me say this though. Let
• 45:58
  Speaker 6: me say this though, everything is the messaging because I
• 46:00
  Speaker 6: can't speak on behalf of you know, different races. I
• 46:04
  Speaker 6: can't do that because they gonna like so that's normal.
• 46:07
  Speaker 6: But one thing that I can say is that everybody
• 46:09
  Speaker 6: is speculating everybody's around. On that day that Meek was
• 46:12
  Speaker 6: in that courtroom, I was in that courtroom to come
• 46:14
  Speaker 6: to speak for me. Michael Rubin was in that courtroom.
• 46:16
  Speaker 6: And when we took that break after the the you know,
• 46:18
  Speaker 6: the judge was roughing me up I'm talking about. She
• 46:20
  Speaker 6: was like, she was roughing me up. We went outside
• 46:23
  Speaker 6: to the hallway and Mike looked at us and said,
• 46:24
  Speaker 6: what's going on in here? Like this guy was really shocked.
• 46:27
  Speaker 6: I'm like, this is being black in America. He was like,
• 46:29
  Speaker 6: what the I'm talking about? He was personally pissed because
• 46:32
  Speaker 6: he didn't understand them to be going because a lot
• 46:33
  Speaker 6: of people just don't know.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: He said, he didn't realize there was two Americas until
• 46:36
  Speaker 1: that he.
• 46:37
  Speaker 6: Listen that day. He looked at and then he attempted
• 46:39
  Speaker 6: to walk back in the courtroom after we had the conversation,
• 46:42
  Speaker 6: and she slapped him around and he like what the
• 46:44
  Speaker 6: like cause he stood up and spoke and stood up,
• 46:46
  Speaker 6: and she was like all right, writing in the paper
• 46:47
  Speaker 6: like he went and done something. I respect Mike for that.
• 46:50
  Speaker 6: You know, people when have their opinions on people. But
• 46:52
  Speaker 6: I'm talking about when I see a good person, I
• 46:54
  Speaker 6: see a good person, I salute a good person. That's it.
• 46:56
  Speaker 6: I ain't with all that other because I'm gonna tell
• 46:58
  Speaker 6: you something. Man, to be real with you, I got
• 46:59
  Speaker 6: a lot of people that's not black. They help out
• 47:01
  Speaker 6: of me because they really people that really believe that.
• 47:04
  Speaker 6: And I ain't talking about business. I'm talking about in life,
• 47:06
  Speaker 6: people that people that love you love you. It's not
• 47:08
  Speaker 6: it's not always gonna be a colored thing. And I
• 47:10
  Speaker 6: know we fight so much to get us together, but
• 47:13
  Speaker 6: at the end of the day, while you spend your
• 47:15
  Speaker 6: time on this planet, you better love who loved you,
• 47:18
  Speaker 6: and you better figure out who loved you and who
• 47:19
  Speaker 6: got your back. Because I'm gonna tell you something. I
• 47:22
  Speaker 6: don't know what anybody else doing out here, but I'm
• 47:24
  Speaker 6: forty five and I'm saying to myself, hopefully I get
• 47:26
  Speaker 6: another forty five out here because my grandma ninety. So
• 47:29
  Speaker 6: I'm measuring it by my uncle James, rusting piece of him.
• 47:31
  Speaker 6: He died, he was ninety three or ninety four. But
• 47:34
  Speaker 6: we gotta we got a nice limp in our joint.
• 47:37
  Speaker 6: Oh was that a pause camp? I gotta run that podcas,
• 47:39
  Speaker 6: because I'm talking about the lift of years. I'm not
• 47:41
  Speaker 6: saying but oh yeah, pass definitely, I got to call it.
• 47:46
  Speaker 6: But what I'm saying is, well, you was a pause champion.
• 47:49
  Speaker 6: He got the more of you and the guinnis. But
• 47:52
  Speaker 6: I'm gonna say this. I'm gonna say this though I'm
• 47:54
  Speaker 6: looking at it like I'm forty five. Now, there's a
• 47:56
  Speaker 6: big chance I'm getting out of this joint one day.
• 47:59
  Speaker 6: I can't worry. I'm gonna be going. I gotta go.
• 48:02
  Speaker 6: I gotta go, and when I go, my whole thing.
• 48:04
  Speaker 6: I want to be able to say I left that planet.
• 48:06
  Speaker 6: That's why, that's why I live the life that I live.
• 48:08
  Speaker 6: I do me. If I want to buy someone buy it.
• 48:09
  Speaker 6: If I wanna go somewhere, I gonna somewhere. I'm not
• 48:11
  Speaker 6: living my life based off of some fears because guess what,
• 48:14
  Speaker 6: you know, how many mothers in the graveyard sitting there, Madge,
• 48:17
  Speaker 6: Like damn, I should have got busy. Damn I should
• 48:19
  Speaker 6: have went here. Damn I should have done this. We
• 48:20
  Speaker 6: don't do it enough. We don't live enough. We don't
• 48:22
  Speaker 6: we don't put more positive energy out enough. Because I'm
• 48:24
  Speaker 6: saying to myself, Damn, I gotta I got a lot
• 48:26
  Speaker 6: of shit to make up on because I know, you know,
• 48:28
  Speaker 6: when I see God, I don't want it to be
• 48:30
  Speaker 6: like that. And I'll tell you because God get funky
• 48:32
  Speaker 6: with people. You know what I mean. I don't want
• 48:33
  Speaker 6: to be the one who, like you, had plenty of time.
• 48:35
  Speaker 6: You know where you gotta go at the end of
• 48:37
  Speaker 6: the day. I just try to put the best energy
• 48:39
  Speaker 6: possible out there to our people to let them know, Listen, man,
• 48:41
  Speaker 6: we ain't got time. We ain't gonna be he if ever,
• 48:42
  Speaker 6: love each other, do what you gotta do and keep
• 48:44
  Speaker 6: it moving. But one day you gotta get up out
• 48:46
  Speaker 6: of here.
• 48:46
  Speaker 5: We got more with Wallow.
• 48:47
  Speaker 3: When we come back as the Breakfast Club, Good Morning,
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: everybody is dj n V Jesselari Charlamage the God. We
• 48:53
  Speaker 3: are the Breakfast Club. Law on the Roaster is feeling
• 48:55
  Speaker 3: in for Jess. We're still kick it with Wallow. His
• 48:57
  Speaker 3: book On With Good Intentions is out right now. One
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: thing I want you to talk about before we leave,
• 49:02
  Speaker 3: you said.
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: You said the feeling of not being punished for doing
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: something you knew was wrong was equivalent to your first orgasm.
• 49:09
  Speaker 1: How long did it take for you to actually feel
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: guilt when when you did something wrong?
• 49:12
  Speaker 6: Man, it took me a while because you're young and
• 49:14
  Speaker 6: you just don't know, so it takes you a while,
• 49:16
  Speaker 6: and then when it hit you just be like, damn,
• 49:18
  Speaker 6: there's some crazy. But it was a while. It was
• 49:21
  Speaker 6: just a thirsty It was just I don't know. I
• 49:22
  Speaker 6: think I was just part of stealing an American dream.
• 49:25
  Speaker 6: I was doing my thing because I wanted to be
• 49:26
  Speaker 6: You understand, I'm looking at these movies, man, I'm looking
• 49:29
  Speaker 6: at rayleiol In Modude Feelers, and you know the part
• 49:32
  Speaker 6: where he burning the cars up, He's throwing the joint.
• 49:34
  Speaker 6: He said. By the time I was fourteen, I was
• 49:36
  Speaker 6: making more money than the grown ups around my neighborhood.
• 49:39
  Speaker 6: I'm like, damn, I wanted to be there. I wanted
• 49:40
  Speaker 6: some money. Because we're gonna be obvious, I always tell
• 49:43
  Speaker 6: people that when that guy in the eighties pull up
• 49:46
  Speaker 6: with that Benz and if you know what I'm telling me,
• 49:47
  Speaker 6: he got the Bens in the eighties. He got that
• 49:49
  Speaker 6: gold chain on, he got that Felix sweatshoot on with
• 49:51
  Speaker 6: them felas, he got them rings on them, nugget rains
• 49:53
  Speaker 6: and all that. And he pulled up to the neighborhood.
• 49:55
  Speaker 6: He's pulling up to our black communities to deal with
• 49:57
  Speaker 6: the most beautifulest girl in our neighborhood. And when he
• 50:00
  Speaker 6: up to get her, as he opened in the car door,
• 50:02
  Speaker 6: and she get in the car door, you know, speaking
• 50:03
  Speaker 6: to him, Mims Johnson, Ms Brown, Miss Green, They hey, baby.
• 50:07
  Speaker 6: But at the same time, you seeing mister john come
• 50:09
  Speaker 6: back from work. He's a plumber or dirty and anybody
• 50:12
  Speaker 6: speaking to him. I'm sitting on the step watching all
• 50:14
  Speaker 6: they take place. So I said, Damn, I gotta be
• 50:16
  Speaker 6: a part of the in the black community. The women
• 50:18
  Speaker 6: dictate who the men want to grow up to be
• 50:20
  Speaker 6: based off of who they date. Real So I'm looking
• 50:23
  Speaker 6: at it like I'm only seeing these girls. They the
• 50:25
  Speaker 6: dealers and dudes. They got nice cars. I gotta get
• 50:27
  Speaker 6: me some nice cars to get me some asks. I
• 50:29
  Speaker 6: gotta get some I gotta get some jury, I gotta
• 50:31
  Speaker 6: get some fly. I gotta get fly. That's what it
• 50:33
  Speaker 6: was about.
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: And the way you saw to get fly people set
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: they only respected the criminals in the game.
• 50:39
  Speaker 6: Listen, do you go ask any judges, lawyers, prosecutors and
• 50:42
  Speaker 6: all that. What's your favorite movies? Gott Fovers, what's your
• 50:44
  Speaker 6: favorite series? The Sopranos, Everything Gonna Be. They love the
• 50:47
  Speaker 6: successful criminals. So I grew up to try to be that.
• 50:49
  Speaker 6: But as I grew older, I took responsibility say oh, yeah,
• 50:51
  Speaker 6: I want I did wrong. You never heard me say
• 50:54
  Speaker 6: it was no. I wasn't in jail for some magically
• 50:56
  Speaker 6: did or because of the white man. I was in
• 50:58
  Speaker 6: jail because I wanted to get busy, and I did
• 51:00
  Speaker 6: what I did.
• 51:00
  Speaker 14: To your point about women shaping everything, you talk a
• 51:03
  Speaker 14: lot about black women and see no women and how
• 51:05
  Speaker 14: you staff your team with women, can you talk like
• 51:08
  Speaker 14: why that's important and how that's helped you along your
• 51:10
  Speaker 14: journey as you like, Bill.
• 51:11
  Speaker 6: Shout out to my manager, business part of the desiree Ivy,
• 51:14
  Speaker 6: shout out the Amrin, shout out the sham lost in
• 51:17
  Speaker 6: my attorney. These women. Let me say a something to
• 51:19
  Speaker 6: you about these women. They get done, that's right. They
• 51:21
  Speaker 6: not playing games at all. I don't know what it
• 51:24
  Speaker 6: is about. Know that getting them going crazy? They lose
• 51:26
  Speaker 6: their mind about No, I'll be like, damn, what happened?
• 51:28
  Speaker 6: Somebody told me, No, todath what what's going on? Don't
• 51:30
  Speaker 6: worry about mind your business. I'll get to the bottom.
• 51:32
  Speaker 6: I'll tell you when I get it done. They move different,
• 51:34
  Speaker 6: and you know what, you know what's going on. I
• 51:35
  Speaker 6: just want to say this, and a lot of these
• 51:37
  Speaker 6: companies in America, they be playing games, and a lot
• 51:39
  Speaker 6: of times people don't see them because they be in
• 51:42
  Speaker 6: the shadows. But when it comes to our culture, black
• 51:44
  Speaker 6: women running absolutely. I'm talking about from not just from
• 51:47
  Speaker 6: the consumer side, not just from the marketing side, but
• 51:50
  Speaker 6: from the boardrooms. The sisters. I went to the ballroom
• 51:53
  Speaker 6: of Rich Claiming Company was sisters running there. Sisters running everywhere, like,
• 51:58
  Speaker 6: I don't think you're gonna get something off. You ain't
• 51:59
  Speaker 6: got no sts in that folk.
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: Every single inpathy I got a black woman running.
• 52:03
  Speaker 6: Shout out to all the dollars, Dolley's a monster, She's
• 52:06
  Speaker 6: no joking, Nicole. Shout out to all the sisters out
• 52:09
  Speaker 6: there that's doing it, going up against all the books,
• 52:11
  Speaker 6: all the racism, in these companies, y'all, y'all going to HR.
• 52:14
  Speaker 6: HR is playing games with y'all. They they trying to
• 52:17
  Speaker 6: weed y'all out. Because as soon as the sister get
• 52:20
  Speaker 6: up and she stand up for usself, oh she's being
• 52:22
  Speaker 6: everybody played victims. Soon as the sisters speak up for herself,
• 52:25
  Speaker 6: these people being, these corporations throwing all these rocks. As
• 52:28
  Speaker 6: soon as the sisters say, I'm not going for that,
• 52:29
  Speaker 6: oh my god, she's being aggressive. Oh my god, I'm scared.
• 52:32
  Speaker 6: Locked the door. Get that. That's cat because the sisters
• 52:34
  Speaker 6: stepped up for us. One thing about a black woman.
• 52:36
  Speaker 6: I don't care who. She's not dealing with, no book.
• 52:38
  Speaker 6: Why do you think we scared of?
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: That's right?
• 52:40
  Speaker 6: But I just want to shout out to everybody out
• 52:42
  Speaker 6: there that's doing anything, and I need to say this
• 52:43
  Speaker 6: to you. I don't care if you gotta what I stand.
• 52:45
  Speaker 6: You got a T shirt company, you gotta put the
• 52:47
  Speaker 6: tape out music, you're doing art, you won yes away
• 52:50
  Speaker 6: from your world changing. Stop looking on Instagram and thinking
• 52:52
  Speaker 6: everybody's beating you and you running late and you ain't enough.
• 52:55
  Speaker 6: And I want to say something to the sisters out there.
• 52:57
  Speaker 6: You are enough they'll never let nobody finish you on.
• 53:00
  Speaker 6: Tell you that you got to be this, and you
• 53:01
  Speaker 6: gotta have this, you gotta wear this, you gotta go head,
• 53:03
  Speaker 6: you gotta take Libya like do you in every way possible.
• 53:06
  Speaker 6: And tell them young brothers out there, y'all kings, y'all
• 53:08
  Speaker 6: ain't slaves. What y'all gotta do is y'all got to understand,
• 53:11
  Speaker 6: y'all the most fearless group of young men ever on
• 53:13
  Speaker 6: the history of life. This generation right now, it's the
• 53:16
  Speaker 6: most fearless Black men ever. Y'all do not give off.
• 53:20
  Speaker 6: Just imagine if y'all switch that up. Imagine what you
• 53:22
  Speaker 6: could do when you go when you say, you know what,
• 53:25
  Speaker 6: I don't want to be a drug deal I want
• 53:26
  Speaker 6: to be a business man. I don't want to be
• 53:27
  Speaker 6: a killer. I want to be a healer. I want
• 53:29
  Speaker 6: to be a giver. I'm saying they could change, and
• 53:31
  Speaker 6: to my young brothers in the rap community, stay away
• 53:34
  Speaker 6: from them drugs man. And it's coming from a man
• 53:36
  Speaker 6: that never did a drug a day in his life.
• 53:38
  Speaker 6: I never did it because I had to watch my homies.
• 53:40
  Speaker 6: I had to make sure they get home at night.
• 53:42
  Speaker 6: And my homies smoked you know they didn't smoke. PCP
• 53:45
  Speaker 6: did all that type of you know, to snort. The
• 53:47
  Speaker 6: little coach you know, did a little bit of little
• 53:49
  Speaker 6: but I always watched it and I said, that ain't
• 53:50
  Speaker 6: for me. And I don't know who told you this.
• 53:52
  Speaker 6: If you feel as though you're going through somebody, find
• 53:54
  Speaker 6: somebody to talk to, get a therapist, get a therapist.
• 53:57
  Speaker 6: Stop trying to self medicate yourself because you don't know
• 53:59
  Speaker 6: what you doing it. And I'm gonna tell you something, brothers,
• 54:01
  Speaker 6: when you hit the town, you young brothers, and I'm
• 54:03
  Speaker 6: gonna be real with you, everybody is trying their way
• 54:05
  Speaker 6: to get some drugs to you. And you don't know
• 54:07
  Speaker 6: if anybody drugs is drugs. I'm just being straight up.
• 54:10
  Speaker 6: I don't know you know what I mean. I'm just saying,
• 54:11
  Speaker 6: you got all these people making fake this, fake this.
• 54:13
  Speaker 6: You don't know what you're taking. And when you get
• 54:15
  Speaker 6: that money, young brothers, stay out of it. Don't stay
• 54:18
  Speaker 6: off them handcuffs. Man, Please please, man, don't disrespect your
• 54:20
  Speaker 6: blessing because God ain't gonna keep blessing you. Man. You
• 54:22
  Speaker 6: think God, listen, God gotta work with billions of people.
• 54:24
  Speaker 6: You think God would just keep coming around blessing you.
• 54:26
  Speaker 6: God ain't gonna keep blessing you. Take advantage of these blessings,
• 54:28
  Speaker 6: keep doing your thing, and just know, anytime you see
• 54:30
  Speaker 6: donks stop me, I'm gonna say something to you. I'm
• 54:32
  Speaker 6: gonna tell you what's going on. And a lot of
• 54:33
  Speaker 6: y'all know I'll reach out. I DM y'all, I talk
• 54:35
  Speaker 6: to y'all regular man. Just know that you kings, know
• 54:38
  Speaker 6: that you queens, and know that the world is waiting
• 54:40
  Speaker 6: for all of us. Listen, Am with Good Intentions is
• 54:42
  Speaker 6: out now. Man, everybody go pick this book up from Wallow.
• 54:45
  Speaker 6: We gotta make this in New York Times Best sell up.
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: You see it when Today tonight we're gonna be at
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: Uncle Bobby's in Philadelphia, me and my man Wallow having
• 54:55
  Speaker 1: more conversation.
• 54:56
  Speaker 4: Bobby's yes about this book. Armed with Good Intentions.
• 54:59
  Speaker 6: Make sure we get you, my man spyed. Make sure
• 55:01
  Speaker 6: to give you them cheese steaks. You like them, taste
• 55:02
  Speaker 6: cheese steaks.
• 55:03
  Speaker 4: I had some joints something when I was like she
• 55:05
  Speaker 4: was he was home, he too.
• 55:06
  Speaker 6: The way you made them.
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: Damn yeah, yeah, yeste sleut. The taste sell cheese tak.
• 55:17
  Speaker 1: It's a little crazy. Now I like that type of stuff. Yeah,
• 55:19
  Speaker 1: but you know, and uh find find your way to
• 55:21
  Speaker 1: support local businesses. Make wallow a New York Times best Fellers,
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: what happened? I can't wallow on tammering and.
• 55:28
  Speaker 6: All that stuff all up. We gotta Also, if you're
• 55:31
  Speaker 6: out there, if you have any hair killing companies, d
• 55:34
  Speaker 6: J mvious looking for sponsors like the sponsors gentleman.
• 55:44
  Speaker 3: Intentions.
• 55:45
  Speaker 6: Now pick it up. It's the breakfast club.
• 55:47
  Speaker 5: Good morning.
• 55:48
  Speaker 6: I heard them.
• 55:49
  Speaker 3: Donkey again, man donkey Uh.
• 55:58
  Speaker 6: Eyas true?
• 56:02
  Speaker 1: Yes, donkey today goes to Reginald renods in Mia bagging Stuce.
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: I'm sure I pronounce that name wrong, but we can
• 56:10
  Speaker 1: call her me a bag of dope. They are thirty
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: five and thirty seven years old, respectfully. They are from Portland, Oregon.
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: And I don't know why. When I saw this story
• 56:16
  Speaker 1: any day, I thought to myself, either I'm experiencing dejapu
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: or I've done this story before. But I figured out
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: the issue. The issue is there's this bag that people buy.
• 56:25
  Speaker 1: In the bag says things about drugs on it. This particular,
• 56:28
  Speaker 1: in this particular case, Reginald and Mia had a bag
• 56:31
  Speaker 1: that said definitely not a bag full of drugs. That's
• 56:34
  Speaker 1: what it's said on the bag. Definitely not a bag
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: full of drugs. Now, if I was a police officer
• 56:39
  Speaker 1: or any type of law enforcement and there was a
• 56:41
  Speaker 1: bag in your car that said definitely not a bag
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: full of drugs, guess what bag, I'm gonna probably search first. Now,
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: granted I wouldn't actually believe someone is stupid enough to
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: have a bag full of drugs in a bag labeled
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: bag full of drugs, but this is this is her, Okay,
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty four. Whatever level of stupidity your brain can conceive,
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: there is a donkey on this planet who can.
• 57:00
  Speaker 4: Let's go to ABC ten for the report.
• 57:01
  Speaker 12: Police Tony, We're looking into a story that seems hard
• 57:04
  Speaker 12: to believe. It claims a couple was arrested after officers
• 57:07
  Speaker 12: found drugs in a bag that had definitely not a
• 57:10
  Speaker 12: bag full of drugs printed on it, and focus on
• 57:13
  Speaker 12: a true The Portland Police Bureau in Oregon look at
• 57:17
  Speaker 12: this posted this picture on social media. They say they
• 57:20
  Speaker 12: discover the bag, along with cash, a gun, and scales
• 57:23
  Speaker 12: during a traffic stop tuesday. Inside the bag, you guessed
• 57:28
  Speaker 12: that they found more than ten grams of fentanyl and meth. Yeah,
• 57:31
  Speaker 12: the couple was booked on drug charges along with unauthorized
• 57:34
  Speaker 12: use of a vehicle and possession of a stolen vehicle.
• 57:39
  Speaker 1: See some of these donkeys be layered. Why would you
• 57:42
  Speaker 1: be riding dirty in a stolen car? Can you please
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: commit to one crime at a time? Do you simultaneously
• 57:47
  Speaker 1: have to be committing multiple fellow the offenses? And if
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: you're going to be in a stolen car where the
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: four Taurus's ignition has been visibly tampered with, why would
• 57:55
  Speaker 1: you have baggies of drugs just visible in a stolen car?
• 57:59
  Speaker 4: Not to mention, you got this.
• 58:00
  Speaker 1: Big brown canvas bag labeled definitely not a bag full
• 58:04
  Speaker 1: of drugs, And in that bag, and in that bag
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: with seventy nine blue fens and all pills three fake.
• 58:12
  Speaker 4: What like your mouth waters?
• 58:13
  Speaker 11: Just that's crazy?
• 58:16
  Speaker 4: Are you doing in Delaware?
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: Three fake oxycodone tablets and two hundred and thirty grams
• 58:21
  Speaker 1: of meth?
• 58:21
  Speaker 4: Not to mention a loaded thirty eight.
• 58:24
  Speaker 1: I know I wrote a book called Getting on Us
• 58:25
  Speaker 1: to Die line, But damn okay, rech no lema. You
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: know they probably was telling the officers like, look, officer,
• 58:32
  Speaker 1: we'll just practicing radical honesty.
• 58:34
  Speaker 4: You know, transparency in crime is.
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: A new movement, and that officer was like, thank you
• 58:38
  Speaker 1: for making my job easier.
• 58:40
  Speaker 6: By the way, this.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: Transparency and crime movement still comes with fifteen years to life. Now.
• 58:44
  Speaker 4: I know what some of you might be thinking, it's
• 58:46
  Speaker 4: organ aren't drugs legal? And Oregon?
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: Well, in twenty twenty, organ decriminalized the possession of small
• 58:52
  Speaker 1: amounts of hard drugs in an effort to readirect city
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: funding from criminalization and toward treatment of substance use disorders.
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: To measure pass with high levels of public support, that
• 59:01
  Speaker 1: faltered as overdose and homelessness rates roles in the state
• 59:04
  Speaker 1: during the COVID nineteen pandemic when Rihanna makeup became widely available.
• 59:09
  Speaker 1: But in September, the state recriminalized drug possession.
• 59:12
  Speaker 4: So the moral of the story is all of this
• 59:14
  Speaker 4: was illegal. Okay. There's absolutely no right way.
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: To do the wrong thing, even in Oregon, and everything
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: Reginald and Mia did.
• 59:23
  Speaker 4: Was completely wrong. Okay.
• 59:24
  Speaker 1: Reginald and Mia might be the first criminals in the
• 59:26
  Speaker 1: history of crime who actually labeled the evidence for the police.
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: And I know they thought labeling it not a bag
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: full of drugs would throw people off, like, there's no
• 59:36
  Speaker 1: way folks would think they were that dumb.
• 59:40
  Speaker 4: But it's not about what we think.
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: It's about what you know about yourself, Reginald and Mia Okay,
• 59:46
  Speaker 1: you had to know that you are.
• 59:49
  Speaker 4: Indeed that dumb.
• 59:51
  Speaker 1: Okay, please get Reginald Reynolds and Mia Baggings, the Sweet Sounds.
• 59:55
  Speaker 4: And the Hamiltones.
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 15: Oh oh they.
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 4: That is ridiculous. A question that's like Lauren wearing a
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 4: T shirt that says definitely not single.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 11: Like you wearing a T shirt saying definitely healed because.
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 4: It's a journey is yes, okay, okay, what is your question?
• 1:00:30
  Speaker 11: Like weed and portchit and guess who's.
• 1:00:32
  Speaker 4: Need I love to be thank you very much, my girl.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 14: But everybody knows that the real cat like the comebacks.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 14: It's mean, it's the house that you need Leaks built.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 14: But anyway, my question before I was rudely interrupted, yes'm
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 14: is this.
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 11: Not entrapment though? Because why would you be allowed.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 14: To sell a back that says definitely not drugs knowing
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 14: that someone might put drugs in it because they think
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 14: it's like funny or something.
• 1:00:59
  Speaker 1: There's this thing called attire, and so whoever made that
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: bag was just making it, probably just to be funny,
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 1: and they knew that, you know, people would walk around
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 1: with the buggers just like up. The bag is like
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: a fashion statement, but they didn't think they actually put
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 1: drugs inside of it.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 6: You got a burket?
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 5: What is this on your berkey?
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 4: Not fake?
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 11: Yes, like this shout out the Sunday Saturdays.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 1: You take like this.
• 1:01:17
  Speaker 11: Burken but that that has nothing.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 6: I hate this.
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 11: I just was that was a whole tree. You playing today,
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 11: baby in the soil. Alright, don't worry. I got a
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 11: new bob and I got.
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 5: Some I'm ready to breakfast club.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 3: Warning everybody, as Steen j n V. Charlamage the goud
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 3: we are the breakfast Club. We got a special guest.
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 4: In the building, my guy.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 3: He's an author New York Time best selling author. He's
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 3: an entrepreneur, he is a podcast host and now he
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 3: is a model as well. Ladies and gentlemen, j she
• 1:01:56
  Speaker 3: a mother.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 1: By the way, Jay Sheddy is more than a podcast hole.
• 1:02:00
  Speaker 1: She has one of the top ten biggest podcasts in
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: the world. Right, Okay, I think that's a very important
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: to note because everybody got a podcast.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 1:02:07
  Speaker 1: Jay said he had one of the top ten biggest
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 1: podcast in the world was the number five.
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 6: I think.
• 1:02:11
  Speaker 9: I think so that's on Spotify. I think that's what
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 9: it came out us. But no, thank you for having me, guys.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 9: I love being here with you, guys. I'm so grateful
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 9: to be back with you. Congrats on the new studio
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 9: and that's not new you for your viewers, but it's
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 9: new for me being in with you. But thank you,
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 9: Thank you guys.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: You just sat down with First Lady Michelle Obama. Conversation
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 1: was everywhere right, and she expressed how terrified she was
• 1:02:32
  Speaker 1: about this election year. What was it like hearing that
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 1: from her? And how do you process that? Did that
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 1: give you anxiety when you hit it?
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 9: Yeah, it's an interesting thought process because I can't vote
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 9: in this country. I moved here eight years ago. I
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 9: have a green card, but I don't you know, I
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 9: don't have voting rights, and I moved here the Trump
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 9: became president in twenty sixteen, and so I've had an
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 9: interesting education in the United States. I haven't you know,
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 9: I didn't grow up learning American history or American politics,
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 9: so I'm also very uneducated in that space. Specifically, I
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 9: think for me, I look at most things as things
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 9: I can and can't control. And when I think about
• 1:03:18
  Speaker 9: things that make me anxious on a global scale, I
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 9: often ask myself what is the root of that anxiety
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 9: in my community? So if I'm seeing whether it's ignorance,
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 9: whether it's a lack of understanding, whether it's a lack
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 9: of curiosity, openness, compassion on a global scale, I'm asking myself,
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 9: where does that exist within me and my friends and
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 9: my society, And how do I start impacting that because
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 9: that I can control. And so I've been practicing that
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 9: for a long time because I feel that there's a
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 9: lot of things that give me anxiety, Like there's a
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 9: lot of things that can stress me out. There's something
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 9: new in the news every day that can do that.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 9: So to me, I try and bring down global events
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 9: into the personal and intimate because otherwise it's so chaotic
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 9: and so hard to deal with.
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 4: How many times do you how often have you broken
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 4: your own eight rules of love?
• 1:04:05
  Speaker 5: Oh?
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 3: Every day?
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 4: Every day? Man, every day.
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 9: I don't think it's you know, it goes back to
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 9: that how can I heal someone? I'm still healing myself,
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 9: And it goes to the reality of and I think
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 9: we all know this at this table. Everything in life
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 9: is a process, right, Like even if you took something
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 9: really tangible, Like we say this person is rich, we
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 9: talk about them as if they can never lose it
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 9: and that will always be theirs. That's actually not true.
• 1:04:33
  Speaker 9: People could lose all their money. We talk about someone
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 9: being famous, you could lose that. So in the same
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 9: way healing progress, development, you can lose it. And I
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 9: think we've got so lost in that destination addiction, the
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 9: belief that you get to a point from which there
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 9: is no return. And I think that destination addiction is
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 9: really misleading in the wellness space because we feel like,
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 9: oh now I'm healed. And I think it comes from
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 9: this idea of if you think about it right, social
• 1:05:01
  Speaker 9: media is full before and off the pictures, this where
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 9: I used to be, look at where I am now, right,
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 9: And it's always like saying I used to be in
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 9: a bad place, now I'm in a great place. No process,
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 9: no process, and linear when the real life life is
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 9: this every day it's just cyclical. And I think we've
• 1:05:17
  Speaker 9: made our minds feel that journey's are linear. It's like
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 9: A to B, like going from LA to New York
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 9: or New York to LA it's linear, but we know
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 9: that life is so much more cyclical. And so yes,
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 9: I've broken the eight Rules of Love every day, every
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 9: week of my life.
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: One of the things you said, man, that I think
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: is so important that I want people to really get
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 1: from this if they don't get nothing else from this conversation,
• 1:05:38
  Speaker 1: is like, there's no manual for any of this. You're
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: not going to be the perfect husband, You're not going
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: to be the perfect father. I spend so much time
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: simply apologizing to my wife and apologizing to my kids
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: because I don't ever want them to think that I'm
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: trying to come off with some perfect human who never
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: gets anything wrong right.
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 4: And I think that is that's very important to do.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 1: And just being present, like when you're when.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 4: You're when your wife calls, your child calls.
• 1:06:05
  Speaker 1: You, even if you in that moment you weren't present.
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: As soon as I'm done whatever I'm doing, I'm so
• 1:06:10
  Speaker 1: sorry that you know I had to do that, but
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 1: I had to go do X, Y and Z in
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: that moment.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 9: Absolutely, And I think I think the thing about the
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 9: point you just made, and I hope this is what
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 9: someone takes away from this as well is I think
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 9: a lot of us in our minds when we do introspect,
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 9: we're quite heavy and harsh on ourselves. I think a
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 9: lot of people are walking around with a internal in
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 9: a critical voice that is completely making them feel terrible,
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 9: and so when anyone says something externally, it's worse. And
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 9: I just want to remind people that you can't hate
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 9: yourself into change, Like you can't guilt yourself into growth.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 9: You can't blame yourself into a breakthrough. When was the
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 9: last time you changed who you were because someone hated you?
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 4: Never when was.
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 9: The last time you supported someone you hate deeply? So
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 9: if you're hating, blaming, guilty yourself, it may get you started,
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 9: but it won't get you there. And so anyone who's
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 9: giving themselves a hard time, I'm not saying to give
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 9: yourself an easy time, but that inner grace, that inner
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 9: forgiveness is such an important part of you actually becoming better.
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 9: So you're not doing it because you're trying to take
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 9: it easy on yourself. You're doing it because it's going
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 9: to let you get through the hard times.
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 3: The most important thing, I think for a lot of
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 3: people is back to what you said with forgiveness and grace.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 5: A lot of things that we do is learn behavior.
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 8: Right.
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 3: Why do people pop their children usually because they got
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 3: popped as a child. You know a lot of the
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 3: things that we learned and we were taught with.
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 9: Yeah, there's that famous quote you just reminded me of
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 9: that says, by the time you realize that your parents
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 9: are right, your kids are telling you that you're wrong.
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 9: And it's that awkward position that we end up in.
• 1:07:48
  Speaker 9: But you know what's really interesting about that. I was
• 1:07:50
  Speaker 9: talking to someone about this at dinner last night, and
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 9: there's this old story that I heard a while ago,
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 9: and it's always resonated with me, even with my own childhood,
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 9: not in particular, but in essence. So the story goes
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 9: that these two men were interviewed and one was an
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 9: alcoholic and the other one had never drunk alcohol, and
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 9: they were brothers, and they interviewed them and then they
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 9: asked the one who drank alcohol and was an alcoholic,
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 9: he said, why are you an alcoholic? He said, my
• 1:08:17
  Speaker 9: dad was an alcoholic. And then they asked the other brother,
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 9: why don't you drink? And he said, my dad was
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 9: an alcoholic. And so I think a lot of us
• 1:08:23
  Speaker 9: got an education and what not to do, but we
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 9: ended up repeating it instead of breaking the cycle. And
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 9: I feel like in my life I had to. I
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 9: got a great education in a lot of my areas
• 1:08:34
  Speaker 9: of life in what not to do and who not
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 9: to be, and I took all those little notes down
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 9: and I think that's what's improved my life. So I
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 9: think if we're constantly waiting for the perfect example and
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 9: the perfect space and the perfect surroundings and the perfect
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 9: aren't an uncle and the perfect parent, it's like we
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 9: may be waiting forever because no one's perfect. So we
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 9: almost have to make a list of what not to do,
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 9: but what not to do also how.
• 1:08:58
  Speaker 1: To That's why that's why podcast on Purpose is so important.
• 1:09:01
  Speaker 1: That's my podcast, like you know, Debbie Brown deeply Well,
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: is so important because we learn how to, you know,
• 1:09:07
  Speaker 1: break break a lot of these cycles.
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 3: Absolutely, we got more with Jay Shetty when we come
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 3: back keeping lock this the breakfast club, Good morning morning.
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 3: Everybody is the DJ en Vy Charlamagne the guy. We
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 3: are the breakfast Club. We're still kicking it with Jay Shetty, Charlamagne.
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 4: Are you wearing gap right now?
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 9: No, no, right now, Okay, I'm just because you saw
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 9: that the gap caps, that's.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 4: Just thought he was handsome. I was like, all right,
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 4: j you know, you know I wasn't expecting that from you.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 4: Thank you, man.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 1: I appreciate you know you and your wife do the
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 1: holiday holiday gap campaign.
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 9: Yeah, yeah, we we were just you know, when we
• 1:09:45
  Speaker 9: got asked to do that, it was like we couldn't
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 9: believe it.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 4: We're like, what is this?
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 9: You know, like we grew up watching the gap campaigns,
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 9: like the holiday campaigns especially, and any I've said to
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 9: my wife, any time I get to do any work
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 9: with her is my favorite thing because I have to
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 9: hang with all day. And so that shoot was fun.
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 9: They made it fun. The creative team was fantastic, Like
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 9: it was a good time. We walked out of there
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 9: having had a great day. So yeah, it was a
• 1:10:08
  Speaker 9: lot of fun. And then was it was surreal because
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 9: you know, yeah, definitely never been a model, So I.
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 4: Wanted to ask you to do you get pushed back from.
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: People who watch you sit down with a Michelle Obama
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 1: or a Jada Pinkey Smith.
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 4: Why didn't you challenge them on this? Why didn't you
• 1:10:24
  Speaker 4: challenge them on that?
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 9: Yeah, I don't get pushed back for not challenging people
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 9: because I think the questions I ask are challenging in
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 9: a different way. But I think I'll get pushed back
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 9: because someone doesn't like that person. Yeah, but what I've
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 9: found every single time is that when someone actually listens
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 9: to the episode or watches it on YouTube, if you
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 9: look at that comment section, it is spectacular, like when
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 9: someone's actually taking out time out of the day to
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 9: listen for an hour or watch for an hour, and
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 9: then you see the comment section, you'll see people having
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 9: complete I had people reaching out about both those episodes,
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 9: the President Biden interview as well that we did earlier
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 9: last year, and the comments of people who actually listened
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 9: to it. And by the way, a lot of people
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 9: were like, hey, I don't agree with this person's politics.
• 1:11:11
  Speaker 9: I'm actually on completely on the other side. But I
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 9: just want you to know that listening to this interview
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 9: was so enlightening from a human perspective. Thank you for
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 9: putting it out there. And I respect that approach because
• 1:11:21
  Speaker 9: I think that's why I do the interview. I don't
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 9: do the interview for any other reason apart from us
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 9: looking at the broken mirror and looking back and saying, Okay,
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 9: where can I resonate with the humanity of this individual
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 9: or where can I relate to this person? So yeah,
• 1:11:36
  Speaker 9: I think that's generally the pushback. But the comments section.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 9: I encourage you on those episodes to go look at
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 9: the YouTube comment section. It's phenomenal to read what people
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 9: are getting.
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because I think your conversation with Jada Pinkett Smith
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 1: the clips is what's set off the Jada pinker hatred,
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: not because of you.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you know what I mean.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: But if you didn't watch the whole conversation in context
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 1: and you just saw clips.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 9: Yeah, she got a tech yeah, yeah, and Jada's a
• 1:12:04
  Speaker 9: dear friend for me. So it's yeah, it's it's a
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 9: tough one because I think any clip about anyone I said.
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 4: I had someone say this to me today.
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 9: Yesterday they said to me Jay, they met me for
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 9: the first time and they were like, Jay, you're so
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 9: much nicer in person. I didn't like you off of
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 9: your Instagram and I was like, fair enough, Like that's cool,
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 9: but it's so hard for me to be all of
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 9: myself in thirty seconds and I'm trying my best. You're
• 1:12:28
  Speaker 9: trying your best you'll try your best, but it's hard
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 9: for any of.
• 1:12:31
  Speaker 4: Us like not to like about you on Instagram. You're
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 4: with your wife.
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 1: No, yeah, puppy's looking your fate.
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 9: No, in the sense of I think he was just
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 9: like you know, I feel like you feel a bit
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 9: like whatever it was, like whatever he's I don't even
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 9: know what it was. But I think all of us,
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 9: if you judged any of ourselves at thirty second real, oh,
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 9: I'm sure all of us would agree it's not who
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 9: we are, you know.
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 4: So, and that's why I have stuck.
• 1:12:54
  Speaker 9: I do stuff with my wife because I feel I'm
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 9: most myself when I'm with my wife because naturally it's
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 9: the person I spend the most time with.
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 4: And so, but even.
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 9: Even with all of us, like, I've got to meet
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 9: you guys in person a few times now. We win
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 9: canned with iHeart on, you know, for the festival last
• 1:13:09
  Speaker 9: year together, And I think when you've met people in person,
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 9: that's the only time you're going to feel like you've
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 9: got to know them. I don't think anyone under I
• 1:13:17
  Speaker 9: feel like if someone if someone okay, if someone follows
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 9: me on Instagram, they understand maybe ten percent of who
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 9: I am. If they listen to my podcast, they probably
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 9: understand seventy five percent of who I am, because they're
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 9: really dialing into who I am. If they've read my
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 9: books and my podcast, they're probably like at that eighty
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 9: nine percent. If they've seen me live, there at the
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 9: ninety five percent, and then when someone's met me in person,
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 9: it's one hundred percent. And so I think it's all percentages.
• 1:13:37
  Speaker 9: And I, you know, I hope that we all again
• 1:13:41
  Speaker 9: going back to forgiveness and grace. I hope that we
• 1:13:43
  Speaker 9: can all give each other a bit more benefit of
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 9: the doubt because I think it will go a long
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 9: way for people.
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 1: You say, language has created the word loneliness they express
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: the pain of being alone, and it has created the
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: word solitude, express the glory of being alone. Could you
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: could expound on that?
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 9: Yeah, it's a Paul Tillich quote. The writer Paul Tillich
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 9: said that, and to me, I extrapolated from his work
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 9: for my book because I was realizing that language and
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 9: the way we use words completely defines how we think
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 9: about things. So when you hear the word loneliness, you
• 1:14:17
  Speaker 9: think sadness, you think potentially depression, you think negativity. Of course,
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 9: solitude is spending time alone with yourself, but with strength,
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 9: with courage, as Paul Tillet says, glory. So what I've
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 9: realized is we've got to be so careful with the
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 9: language we use in our minds. Every single word is
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 9: a seed for either a weed or a flower, and
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 9: so every single word that you say is defining. So
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 9: if I keep saying I'm lonely, I'm lonely, I'm lonely,
• 1:14:44
  Speaker 9: that's going to impact how I feel. But if I
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 9: say I'm in solitude, all of a sudden, there's a
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 9: strength that comes with that. And so I just want
• 1:14:50
  Speaker 9: to encourage people to recognize that being alone doesn't have
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 9: to be a weakness. It can be a time of
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 9: strength and self awareness and personal growth. But it is
• 1:15:00
  Speaker 9: about the language that we use with ourselves. And so
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 9: I would ask everyone to this one activity. Think about
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 9: the one word that comes to your mind the moment
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 9: you wake up or the moment you go to sleep.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 9: Make that word a word that you want it to be.
• 1:15:13
  Speaker 9: Don't let the word you go to sleep with, and
• 1:15:15
  Speaker 9: don't let the word you wake up with be a
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 9: word that makes you feel negative, unhealthy, or weak, Because
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 9: those studies show we have sixty to eighty thousand thoughts
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 9: per day, and eighty percent of them are negative and
• 1:15:28
  Speaker 9: eighty percent of them are repetitive, which means you're having
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 9: the same negative word or thought repeating. It's not like
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 9: we're having lots of different thoughts. It's the same thought. Now,
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 9: you can't control sixty to eighty thousand thoughts, but you
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 9: can control two thoughts of the day. So just master
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 9: the first thought of the day and the last thought
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 9: of the day and make it a thought and a
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 9: word that you want it to be.
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 4: I wonder what when that study was done.
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: I wonder was it before social media after because I
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 1: feel like when social media is probably tripled it.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I probably read it that. That's that probably I read.
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 9: In the last three to four years, So I guess
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 9: while social media is around. But yeah, I mean now
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 9: it could have totally tripled. But it's interesting because it's
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 9: the same thought often. Yeah, right, A lot of time
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 9: we keep saying the same thing. I'm so tired, I'm
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 9: so tired that talk could life last a year? Or like,
• 1:16:07
  Speaker 9: oh god, i'm so scared at work, I'm so anxious,
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 9: that could last a year.
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 4: So, oh, one more thing, yeah, Man, is there anything
• 1:16:13
  Speaker 4: Jay Shady hates?
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 9: Ooh, The answer is I don't because I think hate
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 9: personally collectively individually doesn't lead to greatness.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 4: What about the notebook? You hate the notebook?
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 9: I don't hate the notebook, but I have heard I
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 9: have thoughts about the notebook, Charlie Man, I don't hate
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 9: the number. I find it hilarious as to how many.
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 9: And I was, like I said, I'm a hopeless romantic.
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 9: I've been like that my whole life because I grew
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 9: up watching Hollywood movies thinking that that's how I was
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 9: meant to fall in love. I was that dumb person
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 9: who felt for that. And now I've read about something
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 9: that they call Disney Princess syndrome, where people walk around
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 9: like feeling like they're going to be saved by their partner,
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 9: Like you're going to have a night in shining armor,
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 9: Who's going to come in and rescue you? And I
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 9: think there's Disney Prince syndrome as well, what we want
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 9: to go in and save someone and we want to
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 9: be the be all and end all of everything. So
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 9: the Notebook just has some really questionable lines. So yeah,
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 9: I don't hate the Notebook.
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 5: Well, Ja Shetty, Ladies and gentlemen.
• 1:17:10
  Speaker 4: Where can they follow you?
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 6: Jay?
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 9: To come and check out on the podcast On Purpose.
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 9: It's where I'm pouring my heart and soul and you know,
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 9: excited to share so many more amazing, maybe thought provoking,
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 9: maybe even pushing you slightly conversations to come and join
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 9: us on Purpose.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 1: And his latest book was Eight Rules of Love that
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 1: came out last year, how to Find It, Keep It
• 1:17:28
  Speaker 1: and let it Go.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 4: You got a new book coming, are you?
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 8: No?
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 9: No, no, This was just I was just excited to
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 9: be back with you and hanging and actually, do you
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 9: know what, sometimes I love these conversations because I came
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 9: here not knowing where it was going to go, and
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 9: then you guys just guide it beautifully. So this was
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 9: wonderful man. Yeah, thank you guys.
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 6: Jay Shetty.
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 5: It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, the Breakfast Club.
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 4: Morning.
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 3: Everybody's DJ Envy just Hilary Charlamine the guy. We are
• 1:17:53
  Speaker 3: the breakfast Club or leave us. On a positive.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: Note, the positive notice of this maturity is when you
• 1:17:59
  Speaker 1: know the other person is lying, but you just smile
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 1: and let it go.
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 6: Breakfast club bitches, y'alla finish. So y'all done,