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How do i stop the cycle of reassurance seeking? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Reassurance seeking is a safety behavior.
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  SPEAKER_00: It can reduce anxiety in the short term, but over time it can keep health anxiety going.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_00: You may feel that one more Google search, or one more check, or one more question will finally make you feel certain, but each time you seek reassurance, you can unintentionally teach your brain that that feeling or symptom is dangerous and that you need to do something to feel safe.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: The way to break the cycle is to gradually reduce checking and reassurance seeking, allowing your brain to learn that uncertainty is uncomfortable but not dangerous.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: The first step is to identify your triggers.
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  SPEAKER_00: Notice what tends to increase your urge to seek reassurance.
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  SPEAKER_00: Maybe that's a physical symptom, feeling tired, seeing a health-related content post on social media, or having a worrying thought or memory.
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  SPEAKER_00: Triggers can be external, such as something you see or hear, or internal, such as a thought, a memory, an emotion, or a physical sensation.
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  SPEAKER_00: It's then important to recognise your reassurance behaviours.
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  SPEAKER_00: Reassurance seeking can include asking the same question repeatedly, asking several people for reassurance, googling symptoms, or repeatedly checking your body or heart rate.
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  SPEAKER_00: Once you recognise your patterns, you can begin to change them.
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  SPEAKER_00: The next time you notice a trigger and you need to seek reassurance, don't act on it immediately.
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  SPEAKER_00: Pause and label what is happening.
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  SPEAKER_00: Say to yourself, This is my health anxiety asking me to check.
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  SPEAKER_00: You could even give it a name.
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  SPEAKER_00: Then notice your anxiety level, perhaps from a 0 to a 10, and take a note of where you feel that in your body.
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  SPEAKER_00: Start small.
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  SPEAKER_00: Try delaying the behaviour for 3 minutes.
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  SPEAKER_00: During this time you can continue with what you were doing, practice some grounding, or simply allow yourself to experience the uncertainty.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_00: The most important part isn't what you do during the three minutes, is that you don't perform the reassurance behaviour.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: You are giving your brain the opportunity to learn that an anxious feeling can be there without requiring an immediate response.
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  SPEAKER_00: And if the three minutes feels too difficult, that's okay.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: Start smaller.
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  SPEAKER_00: Once three minutes feels manageable, gradually increase the time.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: Once the time has passed, notice what happened to your anxiety.
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  SPEAKER_00: Ask yourself, what is my anxiety level now?
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  SPEAKER_00: Did the urge become weaker?
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  SPEAKER_00: Was I able to continue with what I was doing despite feeling anxious?
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  SPEAKER_00: Sometimes your anxiety will decrease, sometimes it won't.
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  SPEAKER_00: Both are okay.
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  SPEAKER_00: The important learning isn't, I delayed reassurance and my anxiety went away.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's I delayed reassurance and I was able to cope with the uncertainty.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: You could also reduce the number of times you ask or check for reassurance.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: When you feel the urge to ask, practice sitting with discomfort rather than seeking another answer.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's also important to keep track of your progress.
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  SPEAKER_00: Keep a simple log to help you notice your triggers, urges, and what you chose to do instead, and over time you may see that many worries and sensations passed without the need to check or seek reassurance.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: And remember you don't have to do this perfectly.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Slipping back into checking or reassurance seeking doesn't mean that you've failed.
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  SPEAKER_00: The goal isn't to eliminate anxiety or achieve complete certainty.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: The goal is to learn that you can feel anxious, tolerate uncertainty, and still be okay without needing to check, Google, or seek reassurance.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: If you were thinking about harming yourself or feel unsafe, please seek urgent help through your local emergency number or an appropriate crisis service.