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Jealous People · Let's Ask the Mamas!

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: We got a question for American mama's. Dear mama's, how
• 0:02
  Speaker 1: do you spot jealous people?
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Well, let's ask our American mama's Mama Mama.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: And Jordie's now our American mamas train Edville and Kimberlee Burlison.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: I don't think you're allowed to put spots on them.
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: They'll be like, hey, that other guy's got better looking
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: spots than me. No, hilarious, people are jealous of my
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: sense of humor.
• 0:36
  Speaker 3: How do you spot jealous people?
• 0:38
  Speaker 2: Well?
• 0:38
  Speaker 4: I saw Patrick Bette David. He was actually doing like
• 0:41
  Speaker 4: he was actually talking to children, grade school children, and
• 0:44
  Speaker 4: he was telling them that how you spot a jealous person?
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Patrick Bette David's is the podcaster podcast.
• 0:51
  Speaker 4: Podcaster, Yeah, well known a lot of books, that kind
• 0:53
  Speaker 4: of thing, and he was telling these children using it
• 0:57
  Speaker 4: in their terms of course, but he was saying that
• 0:59
  Speaker 4: when you share a little bit of something bad that
• 1:02
  Speaker 4: happens to you and the person you're telling almost seems happy,
• 1:06
  Speaker 4: almost a slight smile, like a little step in their
• 1:09
  Speaker 4: step or skipping their step, that's a person that's jealous
• 1:13
  Speaker 4: of you. When you tell somebody good news and they
• 1:16
  Speaker 4: are just as happy, and they celebrate with you. That's
• 1:19
  Speaker 4: a good person. That's a person not jealous of you.
• 1:21
  Speaker 4: And so you know, these kids are listening.
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: But I thought, it's it's.
• 1:24
  Speaker 4: Your whole life. This is your whole life. You don't
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: get away from that.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: And we were very lucky because we grew up with
• 1:31
  Speaker 3: a dad that talked to us about everything. We were
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: not allowed to be jealous of other people. I remember
• 1:36
  Speaker 3: distinctly being jealous of some friends that had better clothes,
• 1:40
  Speaker 3: always had new clothes, whatever. And he just was like,
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: he's like, God, I'm really disappointed. I'm really disappointed in
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: you right now, Terry In because I always thought you'd
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: be that friend that would just be so happy for
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: other people. And I was just crushed. I thought, I am,
• 1:54
  Speaker 3: I am very happy. But his point was he taught
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: us when you're genuinely happy for other people for their
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: successes or the accolades that they receive, or the clothes
• 2:05
  Speaker 3: they get to wear, whatever, when you're genuinely happy. A
• 2:07
  Speaker 3: lot of people are surprised by that number one because
• 2:09
  Speaker 3: they're so used to people being like I don't care,
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: I've got this and it's better than yours. But if
• 2:12
  Speaker 3: you're that friend that they can count on to always
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: be happy for you and your success. He said, you
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: will feel so happy inside yourself. Not only that, but
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: when it's your turn to receive an accolade or to
• 2:23
  Speaker 3: get to have some sort of success, they will be
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: the first ones to come back and celebrate with you. Right,
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: you want to be that friend. You don't want to
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: be jealous. And that that was it. That's all I
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: needed to hear.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: We've talked about this a lot on the show, just
• 2:38
  Speaker 4: your reactions and your responses to people telling you good news,
• 2:41
  Speaker 4: and what a gift It is a blessing for you
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: to just respond positively and excited for people is a
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: gift for them.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: And one of the things that I've learned as I've
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: gotten older is that if well, first of all, just
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: because somebody else gets something, that doesn't mean that I
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: can't get the same thing. Right, That their successes doesn't
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: take anything away from me. But there is a time
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: and a place for what I'm supposed to receive and
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: when I'm supposed to receive it, and all of those things.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: And I don't want to be getting it at the
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: wrong time, and I don't want to be getting the
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: wrong thing, And so if that's not something that I'm
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: supposed to have, I won't have it. If it is
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: something I'm supposed to have, then I will have it.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: And having that mindset has just made a lot of
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: that desire for jealousy go away, please, because I'm like, oh, well,
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: that's theirs, absolutely, that's not mine.
• 3:32
  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: And when you impart that on your own children, which
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: all of us have done, it helps them to be
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: the kind of friend that others can count on. And
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: I love when I see my children happy for other
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: people that receive an accolade, even if it's something that
• 3:45
  Speaker 3: they were up for. If they are they can vent
• 3:48
  Speaker 3: to me later and go, man, I thought I had
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: that or whatever. But when they are so gracious and
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: so happy for other people, I'm as proud as I
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: could be for that alone.
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: Right right.
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: And I think about this.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: You know, in theater there's a there's a joking around
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: like how many actors does it take to change the
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: light bulb? Just one? But all the other sit around
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: going I could have done it better. So in acting
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: in theater there you can get a lot of jealousy
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: pretty quick because there's only so many roles and everybody
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: wants that role in the But again I applied that
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: idea of if I'm supposed to have that role, then
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: I'll have that role, and if I'm not supposed to
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: have that role, then I don't want that role. And
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: so even if I've been on an audition, I thought,
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: so I did a better job than the person who
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: got the role. I go, well, I'm glad I didn't
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: get that role because there's a reason why I wasn't
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: supposed to have it. There's a reason why somebody else
• 4:37
  Speaker 1: was supposed.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: To have it.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: And sure enough, you know, a couple months later, as
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: I see their in production or whatever and something else
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: is going on with me, I'm like, oh, that's why
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: I wasn't supposed to have that role.
• 4:46
  Speaker 4: Absolutely, it's such a great mindset that is such a
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: such a great mindset for all of us to to
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: learn from and teach our children.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: Well, here's another thing with regard to athletes, like we
• 4:58
  Speaker 3: were talking about this, Athletes, especially in the game of baseball,
• 5:01
  Speaker 3: you know, you want to be out on that field
• 5:03
  Speaker 3: and sometimes it doesn't.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: Go your way.
• 5:05
  Speaker 3: You have to be that teammate that they can count
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: on in the dugout. You have to be the one
• 5:10
  Speaker 3: that can rely on that's going to cheer for cheer
• 5:12
  Speaker 3: for you, even if it's your spot. And one of
• 5:15
  Speaker 3: the things that I've noticed that I'm so turned off
• 5:17
  Speaker 3: by when parents of these athletes do not go to
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: games because they find out their kids not going to start.
• 5:25
  Speaker 3: I it turns me off so badly that it really
• 5:29
  Speaker 3: does I look at them differently. Show your child you're
• 5:33
  Speaker 3: there for the team, Be there for your child who's
• 5:36
  Speaker 3: not playing, saying look, your worth does it isn't based
• 5:39
  Speaker 3: on whether you're out there playing or not. I'm going
• 5:41
  Speaker 3: to come be with you because I'm your parents.
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: Right and I'm not going to be out. Yeah, if
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: you like that, askar American Mama's a question. Go to
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: our website America reader dot com slash mamas a click
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: on the ass the mama's fucking turned out of Kimberly
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: Brothers and thank you so much.
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: Thank you,