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THE DISCLAIMER: This Week In '25 · The Hauraki Big Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Keep talking, little sound check. Sound check, sound check, sound check.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: This is how we check our sound. This is how
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: we know that we've got sound going on. Just checking
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: the sound. Sound check. Two, two. Sound check. Two. For
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: all you mad bastards loving the Big Show podcast, get
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: up even closer on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok. Or raw
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: dog it. Four to seven every weekday. On Radio Hauraki.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Correct.
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: Hey, guys. That's right. How are we going, fellas? Fizzed up, man.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Busy weekend ahead. Busy weekend, man. What are you doing, man?
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Put me down a little bit, Jase. Little bit, little bit,
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: little bit, little bit. Yeah, that'll do. Yeah, nice, guys.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: That's good from you, man. What are you doing, Jase?
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: I couldn't really hear myself. Just knocking shit over. And
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: I love the sound of my own voice, as you know.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: I do know that. What's happening this weekend, Keezy, you
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: fucking sicko?
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: You know how I said that I've got those, like,
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: Not well-to-do people coming over, but the people that are
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: better off than us.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah.
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: You call them snobs. They're not snobs.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: They're lovely.
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: Your wife's snobby friends.
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: Well, no, they're just very much 15 years older than us.
• 1:10
  Speaker 3: And so they're 15 years further along.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: So about my age. Mate, aren't you like 25 years? No. Oh.
• 1:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so their houses and stuff are really nice, and
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: they've got really nice stuff.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: Have they? I'm still renting. They hosted... Why don't they
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: spend all their money on piss?
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I was going to say, don't, you know, look, Keezy,
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: it's all very well having nice stuff, but at the
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: end of the day, mate, that's not what makes you happy, man.
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: What makes you happy, man, is having a dick that's
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: gone to ruins over the course of three decades.
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Got home last night actually just on that fella's dick.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: The old deck's ripped up.
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: She's gone. Well, the little deck out the front of
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: the house. Did you pour her a drink, man? Times
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: are a-changing. I wish I had seen your house, Jase.
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: It is a shame because I'd like to see the change.
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: Did you take lots of befores? No, we didn't do
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: that with the garden either. We were really annoyed with ourselves.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: But I was amazed because they ripped it all up,
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: of course, how big the hole was.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, man. You're often surprised how big the hole is
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: when you take it out.
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: That was quite a big fucking deck. And now he's
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: putting in a floating deck.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Float? Yeah, floating. Have you heard of that before?
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: My wife said he's going to put in a floating deck,
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: and I went, what the fuck's a floating deck?
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Just means it's not connected to the house, is that right? Correct, yes.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: And it'll just be on its own little plastic feet,
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: or is he anchoring it into the ground?
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Well, all the foundations are really good.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: Oh, good foundations.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: Yes, so he said your foundations are fine. That was
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: the worry, that he's going to rip it all up
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: and go, oh, your foundations are fucked.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: We're going to have to get rid of all those
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: as well, so. There you go. It's exciting. What's your
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: timeline on all this bullshit?
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: Well, that's going to be done probably. That'll be finished
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: because he's doing Tuesday, Thursdays.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: Sure.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: So that'll be finished next week. Then we're going to
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: get some concrete steps for our driveway.
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: Then on to the big deck.
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: And then about the whole thing, everything that you're doing, though. Oh.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: What do you reckon? When do you reckon you're going
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: to have someone in? When are you going to be out?
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: Are you out this year? Yes, yes. Wow, how good.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: That is the plan, absolutely. And I said to my
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: wife actually the other day, if we're not out by
• 3:26
  Speaker 2: the end of the year, I'm going to be fucked off.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Oh, you don't want Hootie Joe in a bad mood
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: around Christmas time, I'll tell you what. I'm often in
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: a really good mood, Keezy. I'd say so. It's just
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: we only see him a year. It's just never when
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: I'm at work. Yeah, never at work. It's no good.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: I'm never in a good mood at work, man. Yeah, right.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: Or at golf. But... What?
• 3:43
  Speaker 3: Hey.
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: I'm joking.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: He's got it. He's got it.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: No, no, no.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: Okay, we've changed topics about 100 times.
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: I haven't even finished telling you about why it's a
• 3:52
  Speaker 3: busy weekend this weekend.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah, carry on. Yeah, let's go back to that. What
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: were you going to say? What were you going to say?
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: We may have someone moving in.
• 4:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: That is a friend of my wife's.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: Oh, menagerie. Like moving in while you're still there? No. Oh. Oh.
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: Which saves us a particularly annoying job.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: I know the one. Yes. So that's good. Back to
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: your big weekend. No, man, I want to hear about
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: your extractor fan. No. It's very boring chat. Yeah, right, right, right.
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: But basically I've got to go to somewhere and buy
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: a carafe and some nice glasses to drink out of.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: Oh, you're joking. Because our glasses are shit apparently. Because
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: we've gone to get out like our glasses. You mean
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: like wine glasses? Yeah. And we've got like four. This
• 4:39
  Speaker 1: is going to be six. We've got like four nice
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: ones and the rest of them are all mismatched shutters. Yeah.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: So we just need to be like, okay, we just
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: need some nice stuff. It's fair enough. You kind of do,
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: but it's one of those things where the men don't care,
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: generally speaking. Yeah. But for women, it's really important.
• 4:55
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: You've just got to accept that it is. Whereas for me,
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: I'll drink out of a jar. For example, I got
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: home last week and we were out of glasses. Yeah.
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: because we've got like three glasses for gin and tonics. Yeah.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: And there was already three people at home.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: So I just used this coffee cup. As a gin
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: and tonic cup. For gin and tonic. And the missus
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: was like, what are you using that one for? Because
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: it holds piss. It's fine. Yeah, it holds piss. It
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: does the job. It's glass. I could take that blue.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: The rubber grip off it. That says Cofix on it.
• 5:26
  Speaker 3: Well, so tomorrow, literally the whole day is put aside
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: for us to pretty much remodel our entire house.
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: Now that's good listening.
• 5:39
  Speaker 2: And it's live.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: What are you listening to there?
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: Oh, me? Oh, sorry.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: I was listening to the Radio Hauraki Big Show. Right.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: Four to seven weekdays. Yeah, that's quite specific. And iHeartRadio. What? Cheers.
• 5:58
  Speaker 3: The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, well, it's going to be spotless, I tell you what.
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: No, it's always going to be clean, but we have to, like,
• 6:06
  Speaker 3: I've noticed, like, I opened the utensil drawer, not the
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: knives and forks, the one underneath, the big utensils, all immaculate.
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, whoa, someone's organised that. I'm like, oh,
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: you're worried about them looking at our utensil drawer, are you?
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: And she's like, no, I just thought it was time
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: for a spruce up. Yeah, just, yeah. But it's true, though,
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: you do need those things to come along to give
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: you the reason to do the things.
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but this is a higher level than I've ever
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: experienced before.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, right. I'm going to buy new glasses.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: I couldn't give a fuck about my drawers, but anyway.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but you also never invite anyone over.
• 6:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's true.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: You've just reminded me, though, actually.
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: We used to have six really high-quality wine glasses.
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: I'd be fucked if I know where they are now. Crystal?
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: No, no, but they were.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: They don't really do a crystal wine glass. No, not
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: a wine glass. I've no idea.
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: But they were really nice fucking wine glasses.
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: Best in the world? Goblet?
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: But I don't know where they are.
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: Now.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: Maybe my wife removed them from the house.
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: Can I borrow them? Especially if you don't drink wine,
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: there's not much use for it. Yeah, well, exactly. You
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: could if I knew where they were. Imagine that.
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: He gives them to me. I'm borrowing Horty J's for
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: the big party. And they're from, like, the 30s.
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: I used to like, back in the day, I had
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: this really nice little sort of half-pint beer glass.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Not like a mug. Yeah.
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: It was like a fluted glass.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: And I used to love drinking my beersies out of there. Yeah,
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: I know the ones that you mean. Yeah. You get
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: in the pub. You do. Like a 12 or a 7.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: They're called... A high boy? No.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: No.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Now I think of it.
• 7:40
  Speaker 3: Because they get the seven ounces, the really small ones
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: that you get in the Raza with your little plastic jug.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: And then you've got a 12 ounce.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: They're probably about that tall.
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: That's a Catalina?
• 7:48
  Speaker 2: And it just sort of tapered down.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: Oh, like a goblety kind of one. No, not goblet,
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: but like. It's like a schooner, isn't it? Yeah, it's
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: like a schooner. Yeah, right, okay. And I used to
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: love that glass. I'd drink all the beers. And you
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: could just do one mouthful and she's gone.
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: Yeah, pretty much. And you pour it in that glass.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: It's like me with chips.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: Right.
• 8:06
  Speaker 2: You know, you'd go, oh, so I can just sip
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: it and enjoy my beer.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you're right.
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: She went down real easy in that glass.
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: Did she? A schooner. Smaller than a schooner. What do
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: they call it? A midi, I think they call it
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: over in Australia. A midi, they do. A midi, a
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: handle or a pot, 285 mils in Australia. Yep, that's
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: the bastard. Yes. It's slightly smaller than a schooner, which is...
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: I loved it.
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: My favorite is the, you know, the seven ounce glasses
• 8:32
  Speaker 3: they give you to raise a, like the really old
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: little glasses they give you. I love sitting down with
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: a giant jug of beer and a tiny little cup.
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: Yes. Cause he's making me want to drink piss. The
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: smaller the cup, I reckon the better. I agree.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: And it's weird.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: As long as you know, you've got that giant vessel
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: to keep adding. It's so good. Imagine sitting down. Put
• 8:52
  Speaker 1: it in here so I can put it in here.
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: Put it, pop it in here and then I'll put
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: it in there.
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: But imagine if you sat down with a beer tower
• 9:00
  Speaker 3: and a seven-ounce little glass from the Raza, but had
• 9:03
  Speaker 3: a bit of tower with its own little tap on it.
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: Imagine how fun that would be. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Just
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: you and the beer tower. Yeah. They have those at
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: Eden Noodles.
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: Really?
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: The beer towers. Good Eden. We've got to go there.
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: We do. Eden Noodle Bar. Walked past there the other day.
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: A couple of weeks away, isn't it? Yeah. A couple
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: of three. We passed it the other day. I was like, wow,
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: it's way fancier than I thought. Really good. Yeah, because
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: the other ones are all shit. Right. Not shit, but
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: they're all just like, here's your noodles, fuck off. No,
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: it's good fun in there. Yeah, right. It's a good
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: fun joint. You mean like West Auckland style? Yeah, 100%.
• 9:32
  Speaker 2: Here's your noodles, fuck.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: Off. 100%, that's what it's like. Yeah, yeah, I've been
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: there a couple of times. It's not the flashiest place.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: And the one in Dominion Road, you can never get
• 9:41
  Speaker 2: a seat, so don't even bother.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: There's like four seats though, isn't there? So that's your
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: busy weekend, Keezy, is it? You got that? No, prepping
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: the entire house for that. Remodeling it.
• 9:50
  Speaker 3: Like we're getting some painting work done right now on
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: the outside of my house. My wife is like, that's
• 9:54
  Speaker 3: going to be like finished before they come tomorrow, right?
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Blah, blah. I think so. So I asked the trader,
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: I was like, because I was supposed to, finish yesterday.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: What is he painting? The base of my house. Right.
• 10:04
  Speaker 3: So we've got a brick and tile house. And the base,
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: the white part with plaster on it is just really
• 10:10
  Speaker 3: old and faded and blah, blah, blah. So we just
• 10:11
  Speaker 3: got that all painted.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I went around to a mate's place a couple
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: of weeks ago. And I'd never been to his house before.
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: And he's got four kids. And I said, oh, I'll
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: come over and this will be the time. I said,
• 10:23
  Speaker 1: just make sure it's spotless by the time I get there,
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: you know, because that's what our experience is, right? Yes.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: You know, you tidy it from fucking top to bottom. Yeah.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: Went around there, shit everywhere. Yeah. Food on the floor. Amazing, eh?
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: And it was great because I felt like I'd been
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: welcomed into their home. This is how it is, their house.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: I agree. They've done nothing special for me. Because I'm
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: nothing special to them in the sense that I'm not royalty. No, no,
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: you're just part of a family. Like you can come
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: into a house. Exactly.
• 10:57
  Speaker 3: It was fucking great. It depends how anal you are.
• 11:00
  Speaker 3: Like I personally don't care. Like I care a wee bit,
• 11:03
  Speaker 3: enough to be like, oh, I'll tidy things up a bit.
• 11:05
  Speaker 3: But like Lucy and her, like a few of her
• 11:07
  Speaker 3: friends and stuff, one of them found out that I'd
• 11:09
  Speaker 3: gone round to their house without her knowing because I
• 11:12
  Speaker 3: was grabbing something off the husband. And then she's just like,
• 11:14
  Speaker 3: and did you completely revamp the entire house? And I
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: walked in and there was like kids toys everywhere and
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: it was real normal.
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: It was sweet as.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: And then she was like, afterwards found out that I'd
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: been there and was like freaking out.
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: At no point would you ever leave a house and
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: just be like, I mean, I have been to some
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: people's houses, but there's something wrong with them. Their house
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: is so fucking messy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But would you
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: ever be in a lived in house and be like,
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: oh my fucking God. Exactly. It's a waste of time.
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: It is a weird, I find it weird.
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: Would you rather be in a house that feels like
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: a home? I fucking hate going into houses and I
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: feel like I'm.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: In a museum. Because you're the oldest thing in it.
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: There's fucking picture books and, you know, a little flower
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: display and 50 cushions on the fucking thing and everything's immaculate.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: Fuck that shit, man.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: Come on, the Hoity Jays. Get a taste of the
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: real world. You don't mean that, though. Yeah, I do.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: That's the closest thing we've had to an invite. That's right.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: A hypothetical.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: But you know what I mean, though?
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: I'm not trying to put my house in fucking house
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: and garden.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: Well, my wife is. Well, you could try, but they
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: wouldn't have it. Yeah, well, they wouldn't. Yeah, they wouldn't
• 12:17
  Speaker 1: have it. God, I watched an episode last night of
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Grand Design Cellars. Can't have a yard about that. Okay. NZ.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: NZ version.
• 12:27
  Speaker 3: The thing that cracks me up on this is that
• 12:29
  Speaker 3: our friends always go, man, your guys' house is always
• 12:31
  Speaker 3: so tidy.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: And you're like... Yeah, yeah, it is. Yeah, it's always
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: like that. When you can't come around. Yeah, I always
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: tell people. I always tell people, it's like, this isn't
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: what it's like.
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: Mind you, there's no excuse for not having a tidy
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: house if it's just two of you living there.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: 100%, and it is tidy, in my opinion. Yes. But
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: it's like show-home tidy when anyone comes around. That's what
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: I mean. I hate going into show-home houses. Sweet, well...
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: But it literally is that. And I don't hate it
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: because at least it gets done. And it looks nice.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: It gives you a timeline because we clean the house
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: every week.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: But the shower, the bath gets done, the shower gets done,
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: the sink, the toilet. It doesn't bother me because at
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: least it's done and it's done really quick and I'm
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: not the only one doing it because my wife's a shopper.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: Can you invite me around to your house, Keezy, when
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: it's really filthy?
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: No. About quarter past midnight. Right now.
• 13:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Hey, listen to the big show, 407 Weekdays on
• 13:22
  Speaker 3: the old Hodaki there.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: Itchy eyeballs. Oh, no. Probably cancer.