Latest / INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living / Love and Kisses │ Msg 4144 - Pastor Chuck Swindoll Insight for Living

Transcript

Love and Kisses │ Msg 4144 - Pastor Chuck Swindoll Insight for Living · INSIGHT FOR LIVING: Biblical Wisdom For Everyday Living

• 0:02
  Speaker 1: Let me read for you several excerpts from this great
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: 16th chapter of Romans. The worship folder I mentioned earlier
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: contains an outline for the morning message that you'll want
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: to have handy. There are a couple of three points
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: along the way you'll want to take note of. It
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: will keep us on target and get us through these
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: very unusual 16 verses of Romans 16. a message we've
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: titled Love and Kisses. Some of you are nervous about
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: the application of that message, so let me put your
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: mind at ease. You have nothing to worry about. May
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: I ask you to stand in respect for the word
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: of God, which is alive and active and sharper than
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: a two-edged sword. Romans 16, 1. I commend to you
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: our sister Phoebe, who is a servant of the church,
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: which is at Cenchrea, that you receive her in the
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Lord in a manner worthy of the saints, and that
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: you help her in whatever matter she may have need
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: of you. For she herself has also been a helper
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: of many, and of myself as well. Greet Prisca and Aquila.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: my fellow workers in Christ Jesus, who for my life
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: risked their own necks, to whom not only do I
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: give thanks, but also all the churches of the Gentiles.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: Also greet the church that is in their house. Verse 7.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: Greet Andronicus and Junius, my kinsmen and my fellow prisoners.
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: Who are outstanding among the apostles. Who also were in
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: Christ before me. Verse 15. Greet Philologus and Julia. Nerus
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: and his sister. And Olympus. And all the saints who
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: are with them. Greet one another with a holy kiss.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: All the churches of Christ greet you. You may be seated.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: Bow with me as we pray. Thank you, Father, for
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: doing things in our life that no one else could
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: have done. We were running in the wrong direction and
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: you caught us and found us and brought us. You
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: brought us to yourself. Someday we'll be home with you,
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: and until then, we walk by faith and not by sight,
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: so we need help. We need to be able to
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: see by faith the invisible and see it as if tangible.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: We need to be able to sense your will, though
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: we don't hear a voice, in an audible manner, and
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: then obey that leading, though we've never heard you sound
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: forth from heaven before. you often speak to our hearts.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Like today, you're going to speak to us in these
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: 16 verses tucked away in the ancient letter to the Romans.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: And it will be like a love letter to us
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: in the 21st century. Thank you for making your words
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: so personal. Speak today to specific people. Speak today to
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: those struggling in their marriage. Speak to single parents today.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: Speak to the singles. To the teenagers. Speak a word
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: to those of us who have been in the church
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: all our lives. Break us free from the brittle veneer
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: of habit. So that today becomes one of the most
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: exciting experiences of our worship years. Get us beyond the
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: familiar world. Get us into the depths of your truth.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: We've waited in it ankle deep long enough. Thank you
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: for what you're doing in places we'll never be. In
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: towns whose names we can't even pronounce, you're doing a
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: great work. In the lives of soldiers and Marines and
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: sailors and those in the Air Force who carry on
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: the fight whose names we do not even know. in
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: prisons with inmates whose lives languish where hope is gone.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: Thank you for continuing to do your work because your
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: people are generous. Hear our hearts, our Father, as we
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: give you our gifts. For our hearts are saying to you,
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: we love you. And we ask this in the name
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: of Jesus. Everyone said. The church was never meant to
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: be impressive or slick or, for that matter, efficient. Though
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: the early church was large, it was never called mega,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: a mega church. Though it was on the cutting edge
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: of its culture, it was never referred to as an
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: emerging church. Though its arms were open wide for all
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: who would wish to fellowship, It was never called seeker-friendly.
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: Because it was full of good and open and free communication,
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: there was a sense of belonging, but it was never
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: called high-tech. All of those terms, all of those labels
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: are corporate words that unfortunately have found their way into
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: the 21st century church. And have caused us to think
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: about church as if it were a business with a
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: cross on top. But the church was never originated to
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: be any of that. The church was called originally and
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: is expected to be even in this 21st century a family.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: A family of both weak and strong individuals. Of younger
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: and middle-aged and older. Of infants and children as well
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: as those who are near death. Not an impersonal institution.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: A place where prejudice and politics hold sway. How easy
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: for us in a high-tech age to think of the
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: church as needing to be high-tech. Several years ago, I
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: was traveling with a number of pastoral interns, and we
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: chose one of the better-known churches to visit. The pastor
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: knew we were coming, was looking forward to our visit,
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: along with several in his staff, and we got there
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: a little bit early, so we walked in and sort
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: of stood around the back and were rather obvious as
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: we were standing there at The head custodian walked up
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: and began to talk with us. It's great to visit,
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: by the way, with a custodian. You'll find out more
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: about the church from a custodian than you ever will
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: from the pastor. So we thought we'd talk to him
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: for a while. We asked him about a number of things.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: And for long, he was beginning to get around the
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: subject of size. So we said, how big is the church?
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: He said, oh, let's see. We process about 2,500 people
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: a Sunday. Use the P word. Church doesn't process people
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: unless it's become a high-tech institution that's slick and impressive.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: You process those names you don't know. This isn't the
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: waiting room for some physician. This isn't a hospital where
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: people go that only have an insurance card to show.
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: This is a family This is a place where people
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: speak words that are reliable and they demonstrate a faith
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: that is invincible and they model grace. Grace that is
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: tangible and, if you will, affection that is demonstrable. Or
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: it should be. Now, I'm going to pause and warn
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: you of something because I've I know church people been
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: hanging around him over 70 years. So not you, but
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: I've been hanging around church people. I know what you're
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: going to think all the way through this message. I'm
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: so glad so-and-so is here to hear this today. Or preacher,
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: pay attention to your own words. You're the one who
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: needs them. You're right. I need them more than anyone.
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: And so do you. So don't think about anybody but yourself.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: I'll give you permission to do that. You're the one
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: in great need of hearing the message. Because if you
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: don't see it that way, you will live your life
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: full of resentment against somebody else who isn't doing what
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: I'm going to preach on today. And some of you
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: today are terribly resentful. So this will help you if
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: you take it personally. We're a lonely bunch, you know.
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: I read this past week about a man feeling very
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: lonely and down on his luck in a sort of
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: a low-rent district of a town and He was walking
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: along a broken sidewalk and he came to an old
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: used bookstore and he looked through the big plate glass
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: window and he saw books on display. One read, How
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: to Hug. He thought, if there's a book I need
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: to read, I'm going to get that book. He walked
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: inside and picked up this big book and he found
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: that it was the 10th volume of an encyclopedia set
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: covering the subjects of how to hug. He felt probably
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: like a lot of people feel when they come to
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: a church. They get an encyclopedic explanation, intellectual discussion, an
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: exposition of the subject of love, but they don't touch
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: anyone else. When we were designing our new building, we
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: were told that pews are not as popular today as
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: chairs with arms because people don't like to touch each other. Man,
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: I remember when I used to lay down on the
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: pew and stick my feet in the neighbor's lap. Maybe
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: that's why they stopped building pews. Far too long have
• 11:32
  Speaker 1: Christians been like a little room full of primary age
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: girls with flowers in their hands, plucking the petals. He
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He
• 11:45
  Speaker 1: loves me not. The church was never meant to be
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: like that. Size, of course, works against us. That's why
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: I've never been enamored of size. Size tends to break
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: down that sense of belonging. And I thank you for
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: tolerating the size of Stonebriar Church. We never designed it
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: to get big. It got big because you wouldn't stay away.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: And we're grateful, but it It means we got to
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: work hard at the stuff I'm going to talk about. Otherwise,
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: you're a nameless face. That if we're not careful, we'll
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: begin to process. Let me remind you of the value
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: of affection. Just a quick breeze through Romans 12 up
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: to chapter 16. Look at 12 verse 9. Just. Just listen,
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: if you don't have a Bible, just listen to these words.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: Let love be without hypocrisy. On hypocritos is the Greek word. Non-hypocritical.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: If you're going to love, love to the face and
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: love to the back the same. If you're going to love,
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: tell a person to their face you love them, and
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: then when they're not around, demonstrate that you love them.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Don't be hypocritical. There's too much of that in the church.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: Love without hypocrisy. Verse 10, be devoted to one another
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: in affectionate love. This is a word for demonstrable love.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: Demonstrable love. It's amazing how many people hold back from
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: even shaking hands with one another in this day and age. Oh,
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: they're germs. Well, wear gloves. How strange that we would
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: worship along people that we've never met. even shaking their hand,
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: pass the warmth of our life into another. Let it
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: be unhypocritical. Look at chapter 13, verse 8. Owe nothing
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: to anyone except to love one another. For he who
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. You know what
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: the church has turned verse 8 into? A verse on
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: not getting into debt. We'll do anything to keep from
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: getting the point. Of course, debt needs to be managed
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: well and carefully, but the verse is about love. Don't
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: go into debt in any way except in a lifetime
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: of love. Love one another. Love one another. Love a neighbor.
• 14:31
  Speaker 1: Don't answer out loud. I wonder the last time any
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: one of our neighbors heard the word love. Come out
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: of our mouths. Or any one of our neighbors had
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: any demonstration that we love them. So this is a
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: neighbor that crosses beyond. It transcends the church. It's neighbors.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: It's folks who don't know Jesus. Wonder how many at
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: work know that you love them. Wonder how many at work.
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: You love. It's convicting, isn't it? Hey, I've lived with
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: it all week. I'm not going to take all this
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: guilt by myself. I'm going to share it with you.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: Look at verse 13 of chapter 14. Let us not
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: judge one another anymore, but rather determine this, not to
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: or a sister's way. Isn't that a good word? Look
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: at 15. For if because of food or whatever. Whatever.
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: It just happened to be food in the first century.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: Your brother or your sister is hurt. You're no longer
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: walking according to love. It's not that you're free to
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: do it. You are free to do it, but love
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: restricts your freedom. There's a law that's higher than your freedom.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: Just as in this free country, there's a law that's
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: higher than your wanting to or being able to drive
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: as fast as you wish. There are lights at the corners.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: There are signs to be observed and obeyed. They build
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: boundaries around it so that freedom can exist without anarchy.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: Get rid of the obstacles so your love will flow.
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: Get rid of your resentment. Get it out of your system.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: It's very unattractive. Look at chapter 15, verse 5. Now
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: may the God who gives perseverance and encouragement grant you
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: to be of the same mind with one another according
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: to Christ Jesus. Verse 7, accept one another. First step
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: of love is acceptance. Stop looking to see if they've
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: got a tattoo or if the guy wears an earring
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: or if he's got spiked hair or she doesn't have
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: the style of clothing that you think she ought to
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: be wearing today. When you start caring that much, start
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: buying her clothes. And then she will probably be willing
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: to listen to you. Stop worrying about the response of
• 17:17
  Speaker 1: other people. You've got a huge log in your own eye.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: Deal with that. Please. All of this is about authentic affections. Now,
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: why do I say this? Because chapter 16 is loaded
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: with names, most of them meaning nothing to us. You'll
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: not read the names anywhere else. Most of them you'll
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: not see. You have a hard time pronouncing a lot
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: of them. Some are Roman names, some are Greek names,
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: some Latin names, and they're hard to read. But you
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: know what? They're there for a reason. So let's make
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: this list of observations. Let's get our outline out and
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: get it ready. Let me give you three things that
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: these verses say and then a couple or three things
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: they mean. And I think you'll see the value of
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: even a chapter like this. What do the verses say? First,
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: there are 27 people mentioned by name. Please don't stop
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: and start counting them. I've done that five, six times.
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: I did it again this morning. There are 27 names.
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: Just trust me on this. In fact, there are eight
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: more mentioned in 21 to 23. So do the math.
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: We've got a bunch of names listed here. All of
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: whom mean something to the writer, Paul. It's a remarkable memory,
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: isn't it? He's sitting in Corinth. He's giving this information
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: to Tertius, the scribe. By the way, he's mentioned also
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: in verse 22, Tertius, who writes this letter. So he's
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: writing down names. Probably Tertius doesn't know a lot of
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: these people. These are people that meant something to Paul.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: You know what I think? I think they're Paul's prayer list.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: By the way, you keep people on your prayer list,
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: don't you? You've got names there, don't you? Surely you do.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: And not just your circle, but outside. You are praying
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: for those that you used to gossip about, aren't you?
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: You are turning that into prayer, aren't you? Not an
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: ugly thing is said about any of these people, though
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: all of them are depraved, all of them are sinful.
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: What a great list. They're all entries in Paul's journal.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: Second thing I noticed, that there are 21 titles. 21
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: titles given in these 16 verses, added to the names.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: Let me show you. I commend to you our sister Phoebe,
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: who was a servant of the church. The word is deacon.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: Believe that Phoebe was one of the early deaconesses. She
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: was a servant at the church. Look at verse 3.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Greet Prisca and Aquila. She's otherwise called Priscilla. Maybe Paul
• 20:30
  Speaker 1: knew her well enough to now have a nickname, Prisca.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: Cynthia is often Cindy. Susan is often Susie or Sue.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: Maybe Priscilla's Prisca. What a great couple, by the way.
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: Did you notice their fellow workers in Christ Jesus? Verse
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: 5 is intriguing. Look at this. Greet the church that's
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: in their house. Greet Eponetus, my beloved, who is the
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: first convert in Christ from Asia. Isn't that great? You
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: know why? It's been a number of years since he's
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: come over into Asia. He still remembers the first one
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: he led to Jesus. Do you remember the first one
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: you led to Christ? Is her name or his name
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: on your prayer list? You didn't just leave them on
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: the doorstep, did you? You still stay in touch with them?
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: I bet Eponatus had received some postcards from Paul on
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: occasion I want to think they kept up a friendship.
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: There are several kinsmen. Look at verse 7. Greet Andronicus
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: and Junius, my kinsmen, my fellow prisoners. Man, you ever
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: been in prison? Don't answer out loud. You never forget
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: fellow prisoners. You never forget those that are incarcerated with
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: you in a dungeon. With Paul. Andronicus. Junius. Kinsmen. I'm
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: intrigued by that. Were they family members? They were certainly
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: fellow Jews. He would use the word for that. In fact. Verse.
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: Seven says. They were in Christ before me. So they
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: were believers before Paul's conversion. Isn't that great? This isn't
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: just a list. These are people who are respected and, well,
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: they're loved. They mean something to the writer. Now, the
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: third observation I want to make is that there are
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: 19 references to greetings of some kind. Greet her or
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: greet him. I commend to you, Phoebe. These are all
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: affectionate terms. There's a lot of emotions. There are a
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: lot of memories flood the mind of the apostle as
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: he tells Tertius. Add the name Andronicus. Oh, Andronicus. Oh, Junius. Junius.
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: Remember them well. And not just greet them, but verse
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: 16 tells the readers to go a step further. Greet
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: one another with a holy kiss. Some of you are
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: looking at me like, don't go there. Don't make me
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: do that. Oh, no. The holy kiss has an interesting
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: history and you'll find this intriguing as I have. In
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: the early church, it wasn't uncommon and still is common
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: in the Middle East for there to be a kiss
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: on the cheek. However, if you look closely now, they
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: don't kiss. They just kind of. But in those days, they.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: They kissed one another on the cheek. He says, keep
• 24:23
  Speaker 1: it up. In the passing of time, it turned into
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: an embrace and a little kiss on the head. Not
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: on the cheek. Hang on. As time passed, they chose
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: to put their lips on the same object. And today,
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: when you travel, you'll see, quote, sacred sites that people kiss.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: Take it from a traveler. Don't ever kiss a sacred site.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: Really nasty as you get there. And then they chose
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: to kiss a scroll of scripture and then in passing
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: of time there was a sheath or a slab of
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: leather that they kissed as one would go to war.
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: And then it turned into a piece of wood that
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: was passed up and down the congregation. How about that?
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: We're passing the kiss wood today. And finally it was
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: a piece of paper they kissed, and ultimately, they no
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: longer touched. Outside your family, it's doubtful any one of
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: you have ever kissed anyone else in this gathering. I understand. T.S.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: Eliot wrote in his book, The Cocktail Party, the reason
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: the cocktail glass has become so important is Is that
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: the communion cup has lost its meaning. Let me tell
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: you where people find real close fellowship. That's the local bar.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: They don't go there because they're drunk. They go there
• 26:04
  Speaker 1: because they're lonely. Oh there are drunks that show up there.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: But most of them are there to have somebody to
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: talk to. That won't rat on them later. It's taken
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: the place of what the church used to be. Vance Packard,
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: a sociologist of yesteryear, described America a nation of strangers.
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: In a rather recent Gallup poll, four out of ten
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: Americans admitted to frequent feelings of loneliness. Some of you
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: in this gathering today, truth be told, spend your evenings
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: very lonely. Author Dave Stone writes, times have changed and
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: so have people. These days, as he quotes from Time magazine,
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: these days, thanks to the electric garage door openers, you
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: can drive straight into your home, never risking contact with
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: your neighbor. Risking contact. He's right. We used to build
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: a front porch with a swing. Now we build a
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: back deck with a privacy fence, preferably eight feet high.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: with a lock on the inside. No one else has
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: a key. Children get this. Children see this. They see
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: the incongruity in all of this. Clara Null, a young
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: single mother from Oklahoma City, once described what she called
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: one of the worst days of her life. Her washing
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: machine broke down. Her head ached terribly. The mail carrier
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: brought a bill and she had no money to pay.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: Almost to the breaking point, she said, I wearily lifted
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: my one-year-old into his high chair, leaned my head down
• 27:59
  Speaker 1: against the tray and began to cry. Without a word,
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: my son took his pacifier out of his mouth and
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: stuck it in mine. Children get it. We're a lonely, broken,
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: struggling body of people and it's the best kept secret
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: in the midst. Let down your guard. Reach out to
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: one another. If you don't, we'll get slick and big
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: and impressive and high tech. And we'll start processing people.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: Long as I'm a pastor of this church, we're not
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: going to process people. We're going to keep shaking hands,
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: greeting you, doing our best to remember names and admitting
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: it when we can't remember and caring about each other. Well,
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: We'll leave the kiss for later. I'll come back to it.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: Right now, let's find out what these verses mean. This first.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: The body of Christ has variety in unity. The body
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: of Christ has variety in unity. There are so many
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: different types. So many different types of people. I've looked
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: at every one of them at length. There are singles,
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: of course, as well as couples. There are households as
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: well as widows named here. Nine of these people are widows,
• 29:51
  Speaker 1: I should say, or women. Nine of them are women.
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: In fact, you'll find this interesting. Look at verse 12.
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: Twelve it is. Look at these names. Greet, Trafina, and Trifosa.
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: I think they were twins. But if you're having twins,
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: don't name them Trafina and Trifosa. Please. There are slaves
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: as well as royalty. As best I'm able to determine,
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: about 13 in that category. So much behind the stories.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: See the name Nerus? Nerus. Verse 15. You'd pass over
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: the name and go right on to the other one
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: that you can't pronounce. But let's pause for a moment.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: In ancient days, an event occurred which shocked Rome. Two
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: of the most distinguished people in the city were condemned
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: for being Christians. They were Flavius Clemens, who had been
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: consul of Rome. The word means a governor, a chief magistrate.
• 31:01
  Speaker 1: And his wife, Domitilla. Flavius and Domitilla. She was of
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: royal blood. In fact, one of her children. She was
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: a granddaughter of Vespasian, a former emperor. And the niece
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: of Domitian, the reigning emperor at the time. And one
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: of her sons was up, designated as a successor in
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: the imperial power. Flavius Vespasian. was executed and Domitia was
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: banished to an island, died a martyr because of their
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: faith in Jesus. Here's my point. The name of their chamberlain,
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: Flavius and Domitia, the name of the chamberlain was Nerus.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: Is it possible that Nerus, the slave, knew Christ and
• 31:54
  Speaker 1: and had something to do with the making into Christians
• 31:56
  Speaker 1: of Flavius, the ex-consul and Domitia, the princess with royal blood.
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: Maybe idle speculation, but on the other hand, that may
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: be who he was. Never discount the importance of your witness. Nerus, perhaps,
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: was the reason those two had come to Christ. And
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: Paul knew him in whatever way we're not told. So
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: the body of Christ has variety and unity. Second, the
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: body of Christ has servants in obscurity. I love this point.
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: The body of Christ has servants in obscurity. We mentioned Phoebe,
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: who is a servant of the church. And please observe,
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: verse 2, receive her in the Lord in a manner
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: worthy of the saints and help her in whatever matter
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: she may need, she may have need of you, for
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: she herself has been a helper of many and of
• 33:01
  Speaker 1: myself as well. Don't you wonder how? Don't you wonder
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: what Phoebe did? Did she make his clothing? Did she
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: prepare some of his meals?
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Did she help him with his appointments? Did she hide
• 33:20
  Speaker 1: him when some were searching to kill him or hurt him?
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: Servanthood represents one thing, hard work. Slaves of ancient days
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: and servants of today are known for one thing mainly,
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: not notoriety. not a role of significance in the eyes
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: of the general public, but work, work. Again and again,
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: you will read of work, hard work. A lady named Mary,
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: verse 6, worked hard for you. Verse 12, the twins
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: are called workers in the Lord, and following them, Persis
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: is named only here. And Persis worked to the point
• 34:11
  Speaker 1: of exhaustion. the Greek says, end of verse 12. Even
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: a couple, Priscilla and Aquila, are called fellow workers in Christ.
• 34:27
  Speaker 1: If you are a serving individual in the church, don't
• 34:31
  Speaker 1: complain about the work. That's what serving means. The work
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: of ministry is carried on by hard-working individuals. Hardworking servants
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: of Christ. Counseling is hard work. People needs represent hard work.
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: The choir and all of its ministry, hard work. Practicing
• 34:59
  Speaker 1: for that kind of piano solo, hard work. Preparing sermons,
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: hard work. But you're not here to be impressed with
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: hard work. You're here to thank God for the servants,
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: as I am. And by the way, this is a
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: good time for me to say this. Since nine of
• 35:18
  Speaker 1: the people listed are women, nine in the list of
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: 27 Paul names are women. John Stott in his book
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: on Romans, listen to this. The prominent place occupied by
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: women in Paul's entourage shows that he was not at
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: all the male chauvinist of popular fantasy. Does it also
• 35:42
  Speaker 1: throw light on the vexed question of the ministry of women?
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: As we have seen among the women Paul greets, four
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: were hard workers in the Lord's service. Priscilla, one of
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: Paul's fellow workers. Junia, a well-known missionary. Phoebe, a deaconess.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: Now let me give a word to fellow Texan men.
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: May I? Since I am one with you. I love Texas.
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: I was born here, plan to die here. Not soon,
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: but I plan to die here. I have Texas friends
• 36:25
  Speaker 1: all over and I came from another state back to
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: Texas and was shocked to hear and to see evidence
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: of male chauvinism even in the church. To hear the
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: ugly comments and jokes and put downs of women. How unattractive, men,
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: for us to do that. Let's stop that habit. It
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: doesn't come from the spirit of God. It comes from
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: learned prejudice. The work of ministry would grind to a
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: quick halt if it weren't for women serving the body
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: of Christ. Funny, when you get overseas and you look
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: into a tribe in some bush and there's a woman preaching,
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: nobody in the tribe worries that it's a woman preacher.
• 37:21
  Speaker 1: They're just grateful there's somebody preaching the gospel. Do I
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: believe in women preachers? Well, not normally, but I would
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: have to tell you the scripture does say, let things
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: be done decently and in order. but before you get
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: to decent and order, you've got to let it be done.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: Many a mission organization would stop if it weren't for
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: courageous women holding forth the truth. Women, stay at it. Husbands,
• 37:58
  Speaker 1: you finish the sentence, okay? Every once in a while,
• 38:02
  Speaker 1: a word of appreciation is really in order. Third and finally,
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: the body of Christ, not finally, but third, the body
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: of Christ has esteem in humility. That's next. Esteem in humility.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: Let me show you something. Go back to Prisca and Aquila,
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: one of my favorite couples. I'm going to give you
• 38:27
  Speaker 1: a quick travelogue. I won't make you turn. Back in
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: Acts 18, Paul meets Aquila, the fellow tent makers, and
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: Paul begins to live with him. Stay with me. They're
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: in Corinth. They live together. Paul mentors Priscilla and his
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: fellow tent maker Aquila. They minister together as the church
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: at Corinth gets underway. When Paul leaves Corinth after a
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: number of years, brief years, but And quickly passing, really
• 38:53
  Speaker 1: a little over 18 months, he's on his way to Ephesus.
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: Scripture says at the end of Acts 18, he took
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: with him Aquila and Priscilla. So Aquila and Priscilla traveled
• 39:03
  Speaker 1: with him and came to Ephesus. Paul was at Ephesus
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: only briefly, according to Acts 18. And then he's on
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: his way down to Jerusalem and leaves Aquila and Priscilla.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: And so they're there to help found the church. They've
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: been mentored by Paul. They have some way along, some...
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: Manor along the way risked their neck for him. According
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: to this passage. Said only here. And then he leaves
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: them in Ephesus. They help Pharaoh. the church at Ephesus
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: and then Apollos travels through and they hear an incomplete
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: theology and Apollos's ministry in 24 to 28 describes Apollos
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: and they pulled him aside and mentored him and sent
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: him back to Corinth where he ministers and goes on
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: as an A magnificent spokesman for Christ. It's Aquila and Priscilla.
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: But all you read about them here is that they
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: are fellow workers. It's no big name. They didn't carry
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: around a little business card that said, Aquila and Priscilla,
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: because of us, Paul lives. They didn't do that. Or
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: Aquila and Priscilla, we mentored Apollos. Let me pass along
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: something to you who tend to be impressed with yourselves.
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: When you get to be my age, you can say
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: things like that, and it's just people accept it. Proverbs 27.2 says,
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: Let another praise you and not your own mouth, a
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: stranger and not your own lips. Guard against any self-praise.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: Servants don't brag on themselves or their work. Stop doing
• 40:43
  Speaker 1: that in case that happens to be one of your
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: more prominent activities. In the message we read, don't call
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: attention to yourself. Let others do that for you. The
• 40:56
  Speaker 1: Net Bible has the footnote, self-praise can easily become a
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: form of pride, even if it begins with trivial things.
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: It does not establish a reputation. Reputation comes from what
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: others think about you. Be like Priscilla and Aquila. They
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: didn't even have business cards. They just risked their neck
• 41:17
  Speaker 1: for Paul. The great exploits for Christ are never known
• 41:24
  Speaker 1: and never make the headlines. They never appear on brass
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: plaques or on statues. They are done in obscurity. So
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: let me pass along an ABCD memory chart, okay? This
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: is the way to help make this happen in case
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: you still are struggling with what I'm saying. A, accept
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: the variety. Accept the variety. I've made my greatest mistakes
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: in ministry by first impressions. Usually they are skewed, especially
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: if the person I'm looking at is very, very different
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: It's easy to think that because they, and then you
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: finish the sentence, that they don't really love Christ like
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: they should. Accept people and the variety of people as
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: they are. Second, become a servant. Work on servanthood. If
• 42:26
  Speaker 1: you wonder what a good project would be for this year,
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: take servanthood. Serve behind the scenes. Serve without calling attention
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: to it. Serve without keeping a record. Just serve. Just give.
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: Just serve. Become a servant. Third, cultivate esteem for others
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: in the body. Even if you don't agree with them,
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: that can happen. Even if you're not necessarily in their group,
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: esteem them. They're a part of the family. Fourth, demonstrate
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: your love. A, B, C, D. I was teaching a
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: Bible class a number of years ago, and I had
• 43:09
  Speaker 1: a group about this size in a midweek service at
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: a church. And I noticed as I was going on
• 43:15
  Speaker 1: in my teaching that the back door kind of blew
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: open and in walked a couple of real studs. The
• 43:22
  Speaker 1: guy had a sleeveless shirt on and tattoos running down
• 43:26
  Speaker 1: one arm, and the other one had a Harley jacket
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: on and a Nazi helmet. The guy with the sleeveless
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: shirt had on sunglasses that he never took off. And
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: they sat right in the back. And when they sat down,
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: you could hear this. And people turned around. They folded
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: their arms and they stared just like this. Looked right
• 43:46
  Speaker 1: at me. Well, I didn't know them. And meeting was
• 43:53
  Speaker 1: over and the crowd kind of mingling together. And they
• 43:57
  Speaker 1: made a beeline right down there. The guy with the
• 43:59
  Speaker 1: helmet walked up to me. He said, your name's Swindle?
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: I said, me? I'm Max Lucado. I have a church
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: down in San Antonio down there. I said, yeah, I'm Swinnell.
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: He said, you the guy on the radio? You the
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: guy that talks on the radio? I said, yes, sir.
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: That's me. He says, something I've been wanting to do
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: for a long time to you. And he dropped his helmet.
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: I'm thinking, where are the ushers? And he gave me
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: a bone crushing hug, lifted me off the floor as
• 44:54
  Speaker 1: he talked to me and said, Chuck, don't ever quit.
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: You told me about Jesus. And I told him about Jesus.
• 45:12
  Speaker 1: And I want you to know, I love you. And
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: I thought, thank God that's what he wanted to do.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Thank God.
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: Then he let me back down. Other buddy came up,
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: another one of those. My back has not been the
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: same since then. What a great moment. I had them
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: all misfigured in my mind. I didn't even think they cared.
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: They'd driven about 60 miles. They'd heard of this little
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: class we had and wanted to be there. He had led,
• 45:55
  Speaker 1: by the way, had led his buddy to Christ, brought
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: him with him. My kind of guys. You bow your heads, please.
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: I really hope you won't leave thinking about anybody but yourself.
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: Where you are on this spectrum of authentic, forgiving, accepting love.
• 46:29
  Speaker 1: And about time you lay down the hatchet. About time
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: you let it go. We'll never be what we could
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: be without true love. Most powerful force on the planet.
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: If you've never known Jesus personally, you need to know
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: that his love for you is just like that. He
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: takes you as you are. And he'll little by little
• 47:10
  Speaker 1: start on the inside and change you into who he is.
• 47:14
  Speaker 1: And you'll love the change. But it gets started by
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: an act of faith. Believing in Jesus. We got a
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: prayer room here for you that has folks in there
• 47:31
  Speaker 1: that know what they're talking about. And they'll love you
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: and accept you as you are, regardless of your story.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: They're shockproof. Lord, teach us again and again and again
• 47:47
  Speaker 1: and again. Since we're people of habit, teach us over
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: and over and over and over what a waste of
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: time it is to put people's faces on our dartboard
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: and to mentally see them as enemies when in fact
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: we're going to spend eternity with them. And Lord, while
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: we're thinking about this, teach us how to love those
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: that are awfully unlovely. Then we'll really understand what it
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: means when you tell us you love us. Deliver us
• 48:28
  Speaker 1: from processing people. Keep us from being slick, big, and impressive.
• 48:37
  Speaker 1: Keep us a family. In Jesus' name. Everybody set? Amen.
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: The preceding message, Love and Kisses, was copyrighted in 2008, 2010,
• 48:54
  Speaker 2: and 2025, and the sound recording was copyrighted in 2025
• 48:59
  Speaker 2: by Charles R.
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: Swindoll, Inc.
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: All rights are reserved worldwide. Duplication of copyrighted material for
• 49:06
  Speaker 2: commercial use is strictly prohibited.