Latest / Recovering Out Loud / Addicts Gone too Soon : The Story of Matthew Perry

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Addicts Gone too Soon : The Story of Matthew Perry · Recovering Out Loud

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So he writes in his memoir that his first drink was at 14, and
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from that moment he felt complete.
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But the big pivotal moment, and I think a lot of people with
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opiate addiction can relate to this, he had a jet ski accident
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in 1997 and he was prescribed Vicodin.
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Hi there, welcome back or welcome to Recovering Out Loud
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Podcast, the show where we get real about mental health and
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addiction. I'm so glad you're here.
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If you or someone you love is struggling with drugs or
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alcohol, please reach out for help.
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Send me a message on all social media platforms at Recovering
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Out Loud Pod or by e-mail at recoveringoutloudpod@gmail.com.
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You are no longer alone. All right, today on Recovering
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Out Loud, I'm going to do something a little bit
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different. I wanted to start a People We
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Lost to Soon series where I talk about people in the public eye
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and their struggles with addiction.
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And if you've ever watched Friends, if you've ever watched
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Matthew Perry act, he was a really funny actor, beloved as
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Chandler on Friends. And you know, when I was in
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rehab with last time in January, I got a chance to read his
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memoir, which is incredible. If you haven't read it yet, I
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highly recommend it. So a lot of this information is
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going to be from his memoir. It's called Friends, Lovers and
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the Big Terrible Thing. So I recommend checking it out.
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He goes into detail about addiction and his struggles with
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addictions he's been to, he went to multiple rehabs.
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Unfortunately, as a lot of us know, he didn't make it out of
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addiction. And that's one of the reasons
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why I wanted to start these episodes.
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So let's dive into it. So we'll start with his early
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life. His name, his full name is
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actually Matthew Langford Perry. He was born on August 19th of
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1969 in Massachusetts, and his parents divorced before his
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first birthday. So his mother, Susan or Suzanne,
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she was actually Canadian. So I'll shout out to all my
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Canadian friends and listeners. She worked in politics for Yeah,
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that's right, she worked. She was a press secretary for
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Pierre Trudeau at the time, Prime Minister of Canada at the
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time, and she worked in. So she lived in Ottawa and
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worked in as a press secretary. Like I said, his dad's name was
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John Bennett Perry and he was an actor and a model.
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He actually talked about it in quite in a lot of detail in his
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book. And his parents met on some talk
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show or she was in, she's a pageant queen in the Canadian
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side of things. So he grew up, Matthew Perry
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grew up mostly in in Ottawa. And he was raised mainly by his
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mom and his stepfather, who was a journalist, Keith Morrison,
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the guy from Dateline. So he talks about being a kid
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and having restless energy. He was mischievous.
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And he actually admitted to beating up Pierre Trudeau's son,
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who we a lot of us might know, the former Prime Minister, most
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recently former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.
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And during the schoolyard days. So that's kind of funny.
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He actually kicked his ass. Matthew Perry really liked
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tennis. He became one of the top junior
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players in Canada, but then he moved to Los Angeles at the age
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of 15 to live with his dad. As probably any kid would.
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He didn't really pursue tennis. It's funny, he actually goes
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into quite a lot of detail in his book about riding on the
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plane alone and and how that really affected him down the
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road, being alone on an airplane and being filled with fear as a
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child because he did it quite a bit.
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So he moved to LA at 15 and then he wanted to, he wanted to
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become an actor, as most people who moved to LA want to do.
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He started with small roles, a show called Charles in Charge,
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Growing Pains and Sydney. But the story, so the story of
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him actually getting into friends and becoming Chandler
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Bing is actually sort of an act of Providence.
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It's it's a funny coincidence how it happened.
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I remember when I was reading it in rehab, I was actually quite
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blown away how it was supposed to go to someone else, the role
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and then it went to him. So I'll explain that a little
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bit. So originally, Perry was
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committed to another pilot of a show called LAX 2194.
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Ever heard of it? No, neither did I.
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So it was a kind of a weird idea for a show.
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It was about baggage handlers in the future.
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And then the project eventually fell through.
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He was free to audition. So he auditioned for the role of
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Chandler Bing. And it was actually funny.
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One of his one of his good friends, I'm blanking on the
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name right now. Originally he got cast for the
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role and Chandler was the last role to be cast in the show
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Friends. So one of his good buddies who's
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also an actor, obviously got cast for the role.
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And he had two roles to choose from at the time, this guy.
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And he actually called Matthew Perry and said, which one should
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I take? And Matthew Perry really wanted
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the role of Chandler. And he talks about in his book,
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he had a real internal battle where he wanted to tell him not
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to take Chandler from friends because he wanted that role.
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And he went with his, you know, better judgement and went with
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his heart and was a good friend and said, no, you should take
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the role of of Chandler from friends.
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And then his friend actually decided to take the other role
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of a different show. And then so the role was open
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for for Matthew Perry. It's sort of funny how that
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worked out and would end up essentially changing his entire
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life. He became extremely rich and
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famous from that role, as we all know.
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So Friends. The show Friends premiered in
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1994 and in Chandler's one liner that a lot of you might know
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made him a fan favorite overnight.
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I don't watch the show that much, but I believe it's
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something like, can I be anymore uninterested or something like
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that? I'm probably butchering that.
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But so this is when he started to really battle the drug
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addiction and started to come into his life.
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So he writes in his memoir that his first drink was at 14.
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And from that moment, he felt complete.
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But the big pivotal moment, and I think a lot of people with
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opiate addiction can relate to this.
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He had a jet ski accident in 1997, and he was prescribed
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Vicodin, right? So he would start with the
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Vicodin for the pain, and then it escalated pretty quickly.
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He started taking 55 pills a day, as he talks about.
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So by his own count, he went to rehab 15 times.
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So if you're out there listening to this and you've been to rehab
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a lot, like there's people like you, you know, and you don't
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have to go out the way he went out.
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He spent over $9 million trying to get sober, right?
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Not just from rehabs, but from therapists and other types of
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addiction treatments. So he was hospitalized so many
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times that at one point his colon actually burst and he was
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put into a coma for two weeks. He talked about it in his book
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the the story of, oh, he was in extreme pain and he was trying
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to leave the current rehab that he was at.
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But they wouldn't let him leave because they deemed it as drug
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seeking behavior and, and they thought that he just wanted to
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go to the hospital to get opiates.
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So the guy at the treatment center actually stood in front
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of his car and wouldn't let his assistant who was driving at the
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time, he wouldn't let Matthew Perry and his assistant leave.
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Matthew Perry was in so much pain from his colon.
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He didn't know what at the time that his colon burst.
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But he would later find that out that he actually told his
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assistant just drive, run the guy over.
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And they got the guy jumped out of the way and they went to the
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hospital. So he was put into a coma for
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two weeks. He had 14 stomach surgeries and
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he lived with a colostomy bag for nine months.
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He makes a joke in his book about being full of shit.
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He was literally full of shit. Like his colon burst and
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exploded. Everybody almost died in that
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moment. Also all through this he was
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filming Friends and he he actually admits to not remember
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him filming 3 entire seasons of the show.
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He doesn't remember 3 full seasons.
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He actually talks about in his book as well where he says in
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the show when you go back and watch when he has a goatee, the
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facial hair, he has a goatee. That's when he was on opiates
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and heavily addicted to painkillers.
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And then when he doesn't you can tell the difference he looks
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completely different. He's sober when he doesn't have
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the goatee. So is the cast mate start to
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notice specifically Jennifer Aniston.
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She pulled him aside once and said, we know you're drinking.
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And he talks about how that moment stuck with him.
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It was the first time he realized that he couldn't hide
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it anymore. And other people started to
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notice. I think a lot of us can relate
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to that where it's like you're you're doing a good job, You're
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not hurting anyone else. You're hiding it.
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And then someone in your life comes up to you and says, hey,
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man, like you need some help, You have a problem.
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And this kind of you have the kind of experience where you're
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like, oh, man, I got to change because I got to do something
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about this. Because now it's not just
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affecting me, it's affecting people around me and people I
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love. So I find this extremely
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powerful and and I resonate a lot with with this, even though
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I didn't I wasn't addicted per SE to opiates.
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I did have my experience with them, but he talks about quote
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the first time I took Vicodin, it felt better than anything I'd
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ever experienced. And the problem was that feeling
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stayed with me. He actually talked about his
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book. He he likens it to your, when
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you take opiates, your blood, it feels like your blood is
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replaced with warm honey. That's how he described the
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feeling of opiates. I think a lot of us can relate
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to that, the sort of warm hug feeling.
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So Matthew dated Perry, dated quite a bit of incredible women.
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He dated Julia Roberts, Lizzy Kaplan.
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But he also he talks a lot about his fear of abandonment from his
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childhood and how it often sabotaged his relationships.
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He talks about how he uses humor as a shield to keep people out
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and keep people at a distance. So in 20, in 2022, Perry
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released his memoir that I talked about earlier heavily,
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highly. I recommend it quite heavily.
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That doesn't make any fucking sense.
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Just go and read it. It's called Friends, Lovers and
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the big terrible thing. So he wrote it entirely himself
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and it was his way of telling the truth before it was too
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late. Kind of ironic.
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Then in October of 2023, he passed away at 54 years old.
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So the autopsy later revealed acute ketamine effects as a
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factor. He turned his old Malibu mansion
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into Perry House, which was the sober living facility for men.
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And now he continues his mission through the Matthew Perry
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Foundation, which is amazing. He talks about in his book, the
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story about how he started that facility.
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He went in with a sponsor of his and then so the guy ended up
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taking his investment, Matthew Perry's investment, and
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disappearing. He talks about how that
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negatively affected him. So when he died, he drowned in
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his hot tub. He was in his hot tub on
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ketamine and he talks about how he was using ketamine from
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doctors but then he was this, I can relate to this a lot.
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He was getting prescribed ketamine and then he was doctor
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shopping and getting more pills and ketamine on the side.
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So the investigations revealed that his assistant, 2 doctors
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and producers were involved in supplying him ketamine for
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depression treatment. Some pleaded guilty, including
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they called this woman the Ketamine queen Jasmine Sanga and
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his dart. His death sparked legal and
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media scrutiny. So he began drinking at 14 and
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by 18, he was daily drinking. Like I said, the jet ski
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accident spent spun him into the world of opiates.
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It's funny that he says here he attended 6000A A meetings, 14
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stomach surgeries and had a colostomy bag and spent around
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$9 million trying to get sober. He had a lot of near death
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experiences throughout the time. So he talks about an episode in
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rehab in Switzerland where Pro for All administered before
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surgery stops his heart for 5 minutes, resulting in eight
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broken ribs due to CPR. So I think there's a lot to
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learn from the story and we definitely lost him to Sue.
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But I was really inspired by his story and his memoir, as you
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know, he wrote it with the intention of helping the still
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suffering addict and alcoholic, right?
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There's a lot of good stuff in there and a lot of hope, you
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know? But ultimately he got to a point
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where, in my opinion, he wasn't working some sort of recovery
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program and he was looking for that connection, right?
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He wasn't, you know, there. He talks a lot about isolation
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in his book being a factor. And I can relate to that.
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Being isolated is literally the key to addiction, like the the
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biggest fuel, the biggest catalyst to relapse an addiction
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is being separate from people, from a higher power and trying
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to do things on your own. This sort of isolation place
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that we get ourselves into. He talks about how he broke off
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engagements when he was sober because he worried he'd hurt his
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partners if he relapsed. Right, like this constant
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liability. And there's a quote in his book
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where he says when I die I don't want to be friends to be the
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first thing mentioned. I want helping others to be the
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first thing. Love that Matthew Perry made the
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world laugh. But the most powerful thing he
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left us isn't Chandler being sarcasm but his brutal honesty
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and authenticity. I highly recommend checking out
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this book. It's a great book for people in
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addiction. People struggling with an addict
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in their life give some real perspective and the fame side of
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things. He also talked about Bruce
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Willis being a huge party animal, which is hilarious.
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They did a movie together, which is also, you know, a big part of
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his success. And yeah, I mean, I really
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wanted to do this because I think it's a really interesting
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story and a different perspective on being famous and
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struggling with addiction. But it's all the same shit.
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You know, I could relate a lot to it, even though he's very
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different than I was. I am, I can relate a lot to the
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addiction and the feelings that he talks about in his book and,
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and what drugs did for him, right?
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This sense of ease and comfort that we, we start to do drugs
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and then we get this sense of ease and comfort that we need to
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find in sobriety, right? And to me today, the ease and
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comfort comes from my recovery program.
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It comes from doing this podcast, It comes from making
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content, doing the coaching, helping others.
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And ultimately, I don't want to go back out there, right?
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Like I want to stay on this side of the fence because it's a lot
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better. It's hard at times, but it's
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worth it. Thanks for listening today.
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I'm going to be doing a lot more of these episodes coming up.
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If you have any recommendations, shoot me a message of people you
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aren't lost too soon or people struggling with addiction.
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I'm thinking maybe Charlie Sheen, even though he's not,
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he's still alive. He has a Netflix documentary
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coming out, but let me know what you think.
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Like, follow, subscribe. It really helps the channel.
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I appreciate every single one of you and let's do this thing one
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day at a time. Thanks for listening.
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Please help us grow the channel and like, share, and subscribe
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for more content. The discussions and stories
16:04
shared on this podcast are for informational and motivational
16:07
purposes only. This content is not a substitute
16:10
for professional medical advice, addiction treatment, or therapy.
16:14
If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction,
16:17
please consult A licensed physician, addiction specialist,
16:20
or mental health professional. You are no longer alone.