Latest / The Rochelle Christiane Podcast / 199. Solar Return Reflections

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199. Solar Return Reflections · The Rochelle Christiane Podcast

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Emotional Mastery Podcast.
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: I am your host, rochelle.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: I'm a holistic human design health coach and this is a space for human design and spiritual journey.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: It's not about being a master of your emotions, rather mastering the tools to self-regulate, to awakening yourself and remembering who you are.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: Human design changed my life about five years ago and I've been learning and teaching the system ever since.
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: This podcast is human design meets spirituality, meets astrology.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: You don't have to have a belief system to be here, just an open mind and curiosity.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: This is a journey of meeting yourself and awakening to your infinite potential.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Now let the magic begin.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode of the Emotional Mastery Podcast.
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: I'm recording this on Tuesday, may 14th, so my birthday is tomorrow and it's that time of year where I do a yearly reflection, and the last few months have been really rough.
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: I feel like, as I'm recording this and I'm going to try not to cry this episode but I feel like as I'm recording this, I am going through some sort of dark night of the soul.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: I've had quite a few changes happening, some deeply uncomfortable, to the point where I want to run.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: But I also know deep down that that is the work and it's showing up and it's using all of these practices that we use when we're feeling great the breath work, the meditation, the EFT tapping, all these things that I sort of do on a day-to-day basis when I'm feeling good, when I'm feeling neutral.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Even that, now that I'm in a pretty low low consistently for a few weeks now, it's a little bit more challenging to implement to want to wake up and meditate and not take a nap, which I've been doing, waking up and just going back to sleep, dropping my kids off and going back to sleep.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: It's reminding myself that I can do hard things, that we can do these things right, that with practice and with repetition that we get better, we grow, we heal.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: And I'm going to throw some human design astrology out there, so if you're not familiar with it you can skip past it.
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: But in human design I have channel 2750.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: And this channel goes from the sacral to the solar plexus and essentially this is in my I believe it's in my unconscious north node and I'm pulling it up right now to.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: I think it's in my unconscious north and south node, but I could be incorrect, because it is so.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: Gate 50 is in my conscious south node, libra, and gate three is my north node and gate 27 is my unconscious north node, so really that just means my, my, my mind's south node in Libra it's this people pleasing right, and gate 50, gate 2750, gate 50 is like that fear of responsibility.
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: Everything in the spleen has an element of fear with it and so it's sort of more of that people pleasing.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: It's sort of more playing the supporting role of like keeping harmony and keeping balance and in that way, the stepping up to responsibility, which is more of an Aries thing.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: Right, we're not to say that Libra can't be responsible in any way, but when we're stepping up to take self-leadership and all those things, that's more of an Aries quality, which is gate three, which is my North Node, is in gate three.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: It's difficulty in the beginning, right, which is literally what's happening right now the challenges, the chaos internally, the overthinking, the exhaustion, the.
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: You know I have gate 24 in my unconscious moon, which gate 24, its shadow is addiction and it can be addiction and substances, but it's in the mind, it's in the ajna.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: So this is addiction in the sense of like looping things over and over and over and over right, like kind of repeating the past and going through scenarios and trying to take ideas and make them into form, right.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: And so I've noticed, like certain scenarios, I'm trying to like pinpoint everything in my mind of like what could happen, and it just doesn't work that way.
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: Right, we gain experience through doing things.
• 3:57
  Speaker 1: I can think everything through to like every possible thing that I can think of, but there's always going to be something that I'm not mentally prepared for, that I haven't thought through, and so it's through, like the action and through the doing, that we actually come to change.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Gate 27 is in my unconscious north node.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: So this is my body, right, my body wants to nurture my body.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: It's like that Mother Teresa archetype, it wants to care for those who can't care for themselves.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: And so it's this polarity, this duality, which everything is, a duality right, of my conscious body fearing responsibility a little bit when I'm in the shadow there, and then my, my sorry, my conscious mind fearing responsibility a little bit, and then my unconscious, my body, just wanting to nurture and care for people.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: And I think sometimes, when we're stepping into, like leadership roles, there's also this weird disconnect, for some reason, from a nine to five job and from what I do in like coaching practices, human design, holistic human design academy, the collective it's this weird, our mind does this thing where I can hold space for people in the same capacity.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: But yeah, it feels different when it's not in my own practice, in my own business, and so I'm reminding myself that I can do this, like I do this I, you know, deal with people who are upset and that I always come from a place of compassion.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: I always come from a place of understanding, which in the past, like it can get me in trouble to the point where I can have so much compassion and empathy for people.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: And I think that's also what makes it challenging is because I do deeply feel so when somebody is upset or somebody is angry, like I take a lot of that on, and so it's also protecting myself and coming back to myself and remembering to have these practices in and it honestly, it's one of those times where I feel exhausted, I feel mentally challenged.
• 5:56
  Speaker 1: I feel emotionally, mentally, physically, financially, because this transition is financially a little bit challenging.
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: The podcast hasn't been getting as many downloads, which is fine, but then there's also that part of me is like should I just stop?
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: Which I've I've thought once before I think it was last August I was going through something as well, and also Uranus is moving through Taurus in my 10th house of career and public persona on top of my son.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: My son is at 24 degrees.
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: Your honest is currently sitting at 23 degrees and has been in there for years, but the closer it gets to that part of me, the more intensely, the more it's like electric.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: I can't sleep.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: This is one of the biggest issues I've been having for like three weeks.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: I cannot sleep and I am such a good sleeper.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: I am in bed at 1030 at night and I'm sleeping and I sleep all through the night Like I don't wake up for anything.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: In the last three weeks it's just been like I get in bed and I lay there and I lay there and I lay there and I'm like don't look at the time, because you're just gonna get mad if you look at the time, and it just feels like all night I'm just laying there and I wasn't going to the gym as consistently as I had been in the past.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: Now I'm getting back into the gym and it's just really challenging and so, trying to come back to myself, trying to ground myself, I felt no motivation to like create and those are truly the things that I love.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: Like I was doing some stuff.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: I pulled my camera out on Friday for like the first time in probably a year and it felt so good.
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: And the person that I was taking pictures of was like why don't you do this professionally?
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: Like why don't you do this as a career?
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: And all those shadows around that came up about, like why I don't do that as a career.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: And I question whether a big part of this is self-sabotage.
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: And even in the current relationship dating situation I'm in, I go back and forth in my mind and there's a part of me there too that's like am I just trying to self-sabotage?
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: Or then the other part of me is like, am I bending my boundaries the way I used to do?
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: Am I bending my boundaries the way I used to do for someone else?
• 8:07
  Speaker 1: I feel a lot more articulate in this situation than I have in the past, but it's challenging.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: It's like it's simultaneously so much of what I've been looking for.
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: And there are things where I think we do have fundamental differences, which nobody's perfect and opposites do attract.
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: Things from the past have been coming up like little tests.
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: Right, that's how I see it.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: It's tests.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: And then, yeah, that element of self-sabotage, of like how easy it would be to lean into something like that and I don't know.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: It's just it's so intense.
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: And when I think back to the last year at this time I was in Austin.
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: I went down to Austin for the weekend because I usually travel on my birthday.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: This year I'm not traveling because my kids will be gone for literally the entire summer well, for a month of the summer and so I'll be here child-free.
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: So I figured I would just stay in town for my birthday and if I wanted to do any traveling I would do it over the summer.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: But last year I did a soul retrieval session in Austin and I was listening to a little bit of it, I just played it.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: I'm going to play a small portion of it and not a lot, because I want to obviously protect my privacy and the privacy of the individual.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: But there was just something that literally it was like stopped on like a certain point in our session and I just pressed play and I haven't listened to this in like a year and what he was saying was so resonant.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: So I'm just going to play a little little part for you.
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: He's coming back into your system like a puzzle piece and then over time those outlines of that puzzle piece disappears and everything gets glued into place.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: So there's a time and this is probably the best way to explain it and everything gets glued into place.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: So there's a time, and this is probably the best way to explain it You've got 90,000 energy channels throughout your aura and throughout your body.
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: If you've got one fragment of consciousness missing from an energy channel out here, your energy goes up and there's no connectivity.
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: So what does it do?
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: It has to go around and it has to go around.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: And it has to go around, has to go around.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: That's kind of a visual explanation of anxiety.
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: Once that piece comes back, your energy comes up, goes hey, there's connectivity, I can do that, I'm used to going this way.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: I go this way all the time.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: I go this way.
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: Oh wait, that's smooth, I kind of like that.
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: No, no, I go this way.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: Oh wait, that's smooth.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: I kind of like that.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: No, no, I go this way.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: So over a period of time, the energy gets back in its channels and runs smooth.
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: But it's basically a recalibration of your system.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: It has to find its way back to normal balance because it's been, you know, it's adapted to a different way of being.
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: It's been, you know it's adapted to a different way of being and when I did the session last year he had said that it would take after the soul retrieval.
• 11:02
  Speaker 1: He said sometimes it takes a couple weeks to integrate, sometimes it takes six months to integrate, sometimes it takes a couple years to integrate.
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: Everybody's very different in the way that they process and integrate a soul retrieval session and I feel like nothing really massive happened last year.
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: Well, that's not true.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: So I had that session in May and I feel like around August things started shifting a little bit, specifically around relationships.
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: I dated someone that I sort of was able to see more of what I wanted out of the relationship and then I went through a period, like I don't know, maybe a month, where I felt very desired by multiple people and and then, yeah, and then I met the person I'm currently dating.
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: But this year has been like I feel like of course there's been a lot astrologically going on with the eclipses, with the nodes.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: I'm having a notable return.
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: So it's just been a big year.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: Big year personally for me, but like all those shadows coming up and really asking for change, right, and so when change does happen, it would be easy to run from it because it's uncomfortable, and also, I've been asking for change.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: So it's a lot of remembering to come back to the practices that we know.
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: And, again, when you're moving through something difficult, when you're moving through something challenging, it is so easy to go back to.
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: You know, our system is always trying to keep us safe, and so we tend to go back to the things that we felt were keeping us safe, even if they really aren't right.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: And my therapist had told me years ago that the only way to change is where the discomfort of being where you're at is greater than the discomfort of change.
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: Now we know, if you're not, like, deeply uncomfortable where you are, chances are the discomfort of change is greater than the discomfort of where you're at.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: And so it really takes intention, it really takes showing up for yourself and not being asleep, to really move through those changes.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: Because, yeah, again, it would be so easy for me, like no, I'm just going to go back to the role that I was doing.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: This is a little bit too much for me and, like I said, it is deeply uncomfortable.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: It's activating a lot in my system that just like makes me want to run, but I'm not because, again, I know that this change is good.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: Sometimes we get stagnant and we need something to shift and we need something to change.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: And so when we start changing one thing in one area of life, everything else sort of loosens up a little bit right.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: And like in that soul retrieval session where he said, it's like that anxiety and like kind of coming back to this coherent space where we begin to have conversations with ourselves right In a way that is more supportive, right in a in a way that is more supportive, where there was one point too where he described a bucket and he was like imagine a bucket holding water and imagine you have I can't remember how many holes I had in that bucket, it was quite a few.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: But he's like, imagine all these holes and it's just like leaking water and you're filling it, you're filling it, you're filling it, the water just like leaking out, but you need to like plug all of those holes, right.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: And so again, through all of this, like caring for yourself, like this weekend I sat in bed and I watched a horror movie or a horror TV show, like all weekend, and it was really dark and I felt myself emotionally being sucked into it.
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: And yesterday I was so low I like cried most of the day and I just felt like heavy.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: And I still feel that low.
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: I like cried most of the day and I just felt like heavy and I still feel that way.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: I feel a little bit better than I did yesterday because, again, I woke up this morning and I went back to bed.
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: I took a nap because I couldn't sleep last night, but I got out of bed and I cleaned my house.
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: I cleaned my house and now I'm recording the podcast and then I'm going to get ready for work.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: But this year has felt very uncomfortable in a lot of ways very uncomfortable.
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: I had a conversation on Friday night that was pretty challenging for me internally because I thought of every single possible reaction in scenario right, that mind, that anxiety, that looping thought thing.
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: I thought of every single possible reaction the other person could have had to what I had to tell them.
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: And the reaction was, of course, not at all what I thought it would be, and so I got really upset.
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: I didn't expect nothing like nothing.
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: So yeah, it's just, I don't know nothing.
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: So, yeah, it's just, I don't know.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: It's just been really, really difficult.
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: And I know, collectively, I feel like we're a lot of us are experiencing this, a lot of what's been going on.
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: I've had people on Instagram that are telling me how tired they've been, how much they've been crying.
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: You know, pluto now is in gate 41.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: So if you have gate 30 activated and you have an unconscious solar plexus, it's activating your solar plexus and it will be for a while.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: I have gate 30 in my unconscious sun and gate 30 is the gate of clinging fire.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: This is like the most intense emotional gate and Pluto is activating it for, I think, until like 2020.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: I don't even I think it's like it's like two or three years that it's.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: It's, uh, activating like 2027 or something like that.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: So it's making it feel really intense.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: Um, I have a defined solar plexus, but it's still the fact that it's on my unconscious sun is really intense.
• 16:45
  Speaker 1: Pluto will be going back into um gate 60, I believe, for a short time when it time, when it dips back into Capricorn, but it's intense.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: I've been reading a lot on Pluto.
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: We have to have the darkness with the light and Pluto in our own chart, so I was trying to see, too, if I'm having any Pluto transits or progressions.
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: And my actual, my progressed, venus is conjunct my natal moon and Pluto, my natal Pluto, is square both of them, which is pretty intense, because that's not just my emotions Now, it's relationships that are coming into play, which makes complete sense of what I've been experiencing.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: And it's all in my 12th house of the unseen, the unconscious, the spiritual, the deep, and Pluto is deeply unconscious.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: Pluto is darkness, it's challenge, and of course, it's always there for transmutation.
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: It's part of Pluto, right, it's not just.
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: And so there's an analogy in the book that I'm reading I think it's just called the book of Pluto, but it talks about a child that was beaten by his father and he became a people pleaser.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: He became the victim, he became the one who, just like, did what everybody else wanted him to do, because that was the way that he felt safe as a child.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: And so this kid grew up, had a family of his own, his child did something and his reaction was to hit him, because that's what happened to his in his childhood.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: His dad hit him when he behaved certain ways.
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: And so the book talks about how he went to hit his child and his fist was just right close to his kid and he stopped himself and he went into his room and he faced that darkness, that inner child wounding in a way he hadn't before, and he was crying and he was depressed and he was going through all those things.
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: And you think about that story and there's nothing in there that seems optimistic, right, the pain that that grown man had to go through.
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: Yes, he didn't hit his child.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: He changing patterns, he was healing his.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: You know his lineage because likely his father was probably hit and his grandfather was probably hit and his great grandfather was probably hit, like that's what happens, right with family dynamics.
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: And so it talks about the absolute pain this man was feeling in the act of almost hitting his child.
• 19:13
  Speaker 1: He didn't, but he almost did.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: And like that's Pluto, right, it's suffering, it's darkness, it's pain, but when we can go through that, when we can choose that different path.
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: So instead of hitting the child, we choose to suffer, we choose to face those things we choose to.
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: Sometimes we're launched into weeks or months of suffering over something, trying to break a pattern and feeling like we're losing.
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: It's so hard and also that's Pluto.
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: And so Pluto, obviously in the first degrees of Aquarius, where we're all feeling it, depending on where Aquarius is for you, what it's doing in your chart, for me personally.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: Again, I just described my progressed what's going on with Pluto there.
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: But Pluto in Aquarius is squaring my nodes.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: So I'm in my node of return and Pluto is squaring it and I already have a Hades plutonic chart, with Pluto squaring my moon in my 12th house, and then I have Jupiter in my 8th house, which brings a huge plutonic chart with Pluto squaring my moon in my 12th house, and then I have Jupiter in my eighth house, which brings a huge plutonic energy in there.
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: So I already have these like challenges right.
• 20:20
  Speaker 1: And because some of these are being activated currently in the transits, it just feels, and again, like this isn't an excuse, it's not a.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: I read a meme once and it was like whatever you're going through, blame the stars, right, something along those lines.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: And so this isn't like blaming the stars for what's happening, but I do think that looking to the stars and understanding sort of gives us more of an ability to zoom out.
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: It doesn't change the way I feel about something, but it more so empowers me to change the way I feel about something, but it more so empowers me to understand the steps, understand psychically what this is doing for me, to reflect and, I guess, more so to put languaging because I have a moon in the 12th house, square, pluto.
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: Sometimes it's really difficult for me to pinpoint what exactly I'm feeling right.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: I feel intensely and then, of course, my mind latches onto stories and I've gotten really good at calling bullshit on all those stories of my mind, but I feel like it still gives me an ability and a language and an understanding that I wouldn't necessarily have otherwise.
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: So I don't know.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: That's what astrology does for me.
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: That's where it's really helpful and, again, it doesn't invalidate my experience.
• 21:44
  Speaker 1: I know this too shall pass.
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: I know that Every hard thing I've gone through has passed right, and also life is cyclical.
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: We're always going to be cycling through, and some more intensely than others.
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: Whatever it is that your journey is, whatever it is that you're learning, whatever it is that you're not learning, whatever it is right and moving through it with as much grace and compassion for yourself and others as you can, prioritizing others as well.
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: I think being in service and helping others is huge in our own personal healing.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: That's what Chiron is right.
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: Chiron is our wounded healer and also it's where we can heal others or help others heal.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: In that arena we're then healing ourselves, right, because Chiron gave up himself for someone else and that was sort of his story.
• 22:45
  Speaker 1: But yeah, I don't know and, of course, with emotional authority, I could wake up tomorrow and feel okay.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: I could wake up tomorrow and feel okay, and I'm used to dipping in a little bit and out of emotions a little bit, but this has been consistently for a few weeks, and so I just wanted to come, I guess, and share about that that.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: I don't know whether this is partly in due to the soul retrieval, which is partly in due to the trans, is probably due to just like life, right, Like somebody last night told me that you know, when we make changes like I've made, it's like drinking water out of a fire hose, right, like it's going to suck for a while, and you just continue to show up and you just continue to learn, put yourself in different scenarios and learn different situations and learn different things, and then you become an expert at it, right, like that's what it is.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: It's like when I first learned German design, I had my very first session.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: I was terrified.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, I don't know, and now I'm so much more familiar and I feel like so much more of an expert in that area, but yet there are still parts of a design or some sessions that I have that I'm like, oh my gosh, right.
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: Like the deeper I go into the knowledge, it's literally the same the more you know, the more you don't know.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: And especially with a new situation, a new scenario, a new position, a new role, you have to come at it with the eyes of like that literally that the more I know, the more I don't know.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: Like I'm not walking in, thinking like I know everything.
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: Keep an open mind, curiosity, curiosity, and keep with your practices that you know work, whether it's EFT, tapping, journaling, meditation, breath work.
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: I've really been practicing just breath work in the sense of like breathing in for four, holding for two, exhaling for eight.
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: That's sort of what I'm trying to do in moments like coming back to myself.
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: But and talking about it, you know, I think having safe people that you can express and connect with is really, really important.
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: I was just listening to the Almost 30 podcast and they were talking about the notes app on their phones and how it's just full of them talking things out and I know that that really helps me.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: You know obviously the podcast, but there are, you know, obviously more personal things that that's helpful, just like getting it out.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: So that's my yearly reflection.
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: Deeply uncomfortable year so far, a very different experience than last year, but reminding myself that this too shall pass, it is for the highest good, it's all happening for me, not to me, right?
• 25:22
  Speaker 1: And uh, holding as much grace and compassion as I can for myself in this process.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: And yeah, 38, that's uh, for some reason, this, this birthday this year, this number, although it's just a number, for some reason this one feels more significant than some of the other ones that I've gone through.
• 25:47
  Speaker 1: But I hope you all have a wonderful, wonderful week.
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: I hope you all have a wonderful, wonderful week.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: Next week I have.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: I am speaking to a tantric practitioner.
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: We'll be talking about sex, so it's going to be a good one.
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: Until then, I love you and I will talk to you soon.