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I LOVE GETTING SWEET MESSAGES!!! · Relatables

0:00
Speaker 1: Coming up on Relatables.
0:02
Speaker 2: Does she miss him because she likes him? But does
0:04
Speaker 2: she just miss the sex? Like it's good sex? It's
0:07
Speaker 2: hard to come by these days, mate.
0:09
Speaker 1: It's a good point. Those guys on e harmony aren't
0:11
Speaker 1: always the best.
0:12
Speaker 2: Love bubble dot com mate, those guys are relatable. The
0:28
Speaker 2: Relatables podcast is hosted by myself, Oddie Clark a k A.
0:32
Speaker 2: Mummy and my partner in crime, mister Jake Craig a
0:36
Speaker 2: k A. Regretfully saying daddy saying heard in my voice
0:44
Speaker 2: every time I say it. You love saying daddy. But today,
0:47
Speaker 2: what do we want to start the podcast with?
0:48
Speaker 1: We're starting with what we're doing a double take because
0:52
Speaker 1: it was so good last time, on things men have
0:54
Speaker 1: no business doing. Yes, there's quite a few things that
0:57
Speaker 1: we have no business doing. As we have discovered.
1:00
Speaker 2: This is one of my favorite ones so far. The
1:02
Speaker 2: responses from you guys on Instagram have been unreal.
1:05
Speaker 1: Yeah oh yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Some of them are
1:07
Speaker 1: a little niche and I found yeah and some of
1:09
Speaker 1: the little niche and I think, actually that's kind of true.
1:11
Speaker 2: And some of them are I wonder if any of
1:12
Speaker 2: people writing in the Instagram are like, ah, this is funny.
1:15
Speaker 2: And then there's like a thousand other people say anyone
1:17
Speaker 2: who said things men have no business doing?
1:19
Speaker 1: Breathe like that was popular?
1:21
Speaker 3: Yeah?
1:21
Speaker 1: Get original, Yeah, get original. You know what I thought
1:24
Speaker 1: was going to be the most popular one was things
1:26
Speaker 1: men have no business doing? And I thought everyone was
1:28
Speaker 1: going to say a podcast. Yeah, but we got it
1:30
Speaker 1: twice fans like us, mate, fans, they do. One of
1:33
Speaker 1: them said a podcast and then in captions, just kidding you, guys.
1:36
Speaker 1: The best things men have no business doing growing a
1:42
Speaker 1: mustache and then suddenly becoming hot. Is that what happens?
1:46
Speaker 1: Girls love mustaches right now?
1:47
Speaker 2: Have you been seeing what I'm doing? Coming up on
1:54
Speaker 2: twenty four years of growth?
1:55
Speaker 1: Mate? Have you never shaved that shaded? That doesn't happen.
2:00
Speaker 2: It doesn't have an overnight. This beautiful thing we got.
2:04
Speaker 1: Jesus yours. You could grow a good one, no mustache
2:08
Speaker 1: for some reason, I could try, yeh, I can around.
2:12
Speaker 2: You're hairy like fuck it like this grows good. Anyone
2:16
Speaker 2: wants a beard, let us know, Jake beard.
2:19
Speaker 1: Yeah. I don't want to be dark.
2:21
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've only seen it when we traveled for ages
2:23
Speaker 2: and like Fraser dark as your hair okay.
2:27
Speaker 1: Not black. You don't want to have that jaw line.
2:32
Speaker 1: I could cut myself though.
2:33
Speaker 2: I need to chill things. Men have no business doing
2:37
Speaker 2: asking hypothetical.
2:38
Speaker 1: Questions, Oh, hypothetically speaking, pathetically speaking, would you be that?
2:45
Speaker 1: Would you still love me if you're a worm? Hypothetically
2:52
Speaker 1: if I was single? I don't say, I'll go like,
2:54
Speaker 1: let's just say a bigger let's just say like, this
2:57
Speaker 1: is the scenario. Hypothetical is a bit of a big
2:59
Speaker 1: word for us. True, I'm not Yeah, yeah, I don't
3:01
Speaker 1: think I've ever once said to my girlfriend I'm pathetically speaking.
3:04
Speaker 1: She'd be like, who are you in the scientific experiment?
3:06
Speaker 1: We've got it coming on, my dear.
3:09
Speaker 3: Things.
3:10
Speaker 1: Men have no business doing that little half smile slash
3:14
Speaker 1: smirk when they know what they're doing.
3:16
Speaker 2: That's my specialty.
3:17
Speaker 1: Can I I know exactly what?
3:23
Speaker 2: Don't give them too much things. Men have no business
3:27
Speaker 2: doing disturbing my pH balance.
3:34
Speaker 1: I actually didn't know how delicate a female's pH balance was.
3:40
Speaker 1: We learned about this on the pod. Actually, yeah, I
3:43
Speaker 1: don't think a lot of men do. Know. It doesn't
3:45
Speaker 1: take much, no, you know, like wash that dip.
3:50
Speaker 2: And everything else around. Yeah, I think it's more the
3:53
Speaker 2: other things. I assume you can't really get a dirty pennis,
3:56
Speaker 2: like your hands and what's the dirty side of things touching?
3:58
Speaker 4: Yeah?
3:59
Speaker 3: True, you definitely watched your want to wash your hands. Yeah,
4:01
Speaker 3: I don't watch them when I.
4:02
Speaker 1: Pee, that's all right, oh things. Men have no business
4:07
Speaker 1: doing the magic peepee thing where you can make it
4:09
Speaker 1: move with your mind.
4:10
Speaker 2: Oh my god. I did this with my girlfriend every day.
4:13
Speaker 2: I was wearing this is great trackies, and for some reason,
4:17
Speaker 2: I know we're probably doing something, got a little bit
4:18
Speaker 2: excited and I just started doing it. She was like,
4:21
Speaker 2: it's like I was like I was doing a magic show, right, It's.
4:24
Speaker 1: Like you got to string up here?
4:25
Speaker 2: And she's like, wow, just like can everyone do that?
4:28
Speaker 2: I can't speak for everyone, but I know why I can.
4:32
Speaker 2: But I apparently I don't do it. But most guys
4:35
Speaker 2: when they move their pippy, they clenched their buttets.
4:38
Speaker 1: So it was a bit of an eck. No, I don't.
4:41
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like maybe a little bit.
4:43
Speaker 1: If I like if I needed to fart, and then
4:47
Speaker 1: I tried to do it, I don't think I would
4:49
Speaker 1: be able to do it without farting.
4:51
Speaker 3: But I don't like actually clench my cheek.
4:52
Speaker 2: That would be the least sexiest thing fight when you're
4:56
Speaker 2: trying to do it. Things men have no business doing.
5:00
Speaker 2: Blaming what I've just explained.
5:06
Speaker 1: Guilty. I think it's a good thing, isn't it. We
5:11
Speaker 1: just had a meeting, and we just had a freaking meeting,
5:16
Speaker 1: and I did it to the dude in the meeting,
5:17
Speaker 1: And in the end of my sentence, I realized what
5:18
Speaker 1: I just did, and I was like, so, as you
5:20
Speaker 1: just said.
5:22
Speaker 2: Sometimes you do go on to be fair, We've been
5:25
Speaker 2: doing a lot. But I was just like, I swear
5:27
Speaker 2: who you said that? And then you're like, oh, yeah,
5:28
Speaker 2: actually yeah.
5:29
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, as you just said, actually you
5:31
Speaker 1: needed to.
5:31
Speaker 2: Like maybe that's how it works. It makes sense of it,
5:33
Speaker 2: not justifying men like man's plaining, but we have to
5:37
Speaker 2: word it ourselves for it to make sense and comprehending
5:39
Speaker 2: our brain.
5:40
Speaker 1: That's actually a good point. Yeah, that's a very good
5:42
Speaker 1: because we're thick.
5:45
Speaker 3: Things men have no business doing.
5:47
Speaker 1: Being twenty eight plus on dating apps, not looking for
5:50
Speaker 1: anything serious but wanting kids.
5:55
Speaker 2: I was so true that contradicted himself. Yeah, oh, what
6:00
Speaker 2: are they doing on that? What's the age? It's truly,
6:03
Speaker 2: it's not embarassing to be on a dating apphen you're
6:05
Speaker 2: older and single.
6:06
Speaker 1: Nah, I'm pretty sure.
6:09
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure. Like it's over fifty percent of people
6:12
Speaker 3: now meet online.
6:14
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, well it opens up so many different
6:16
Speaker 1: avenues to meeting people.
6:17
Speaker 3: Yeah.
6:17
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like it's it's.
6:18
Speaker 2: Like we're promoting a dating a hassle free But I
6:21
Speaker 2: get it though.
6:22
Speaker 1: It's a hassle free way of you know. It's like,
6:25
Speaker 1: I feel like dating takes time. So if you even
6:27
Speaker 1: e harmony though, like a dating website or something Tinder
6:29
Speaker 1: or a bumble or something like.
6:31
Speaker 2: Is he harmony still thing?
6:32
Speaker 1: I think I think it is.
6:34
Speaker 2: Are they going their computer logging and stuff? Maybe that's
6:36
Speaker 2: what fifty year old does, Yeah, logging on talking to Lisa,
6:39
Speaker 2: your day, my sweetie pie.
6:41
Speaker 1: When I went to Bloody Canada just last timer went
6:44
Speaker 1: to Canada, Yeah, I was talking to my grandpa. I
6:47
Speaker 1: only got to see them once because they were going
6:48
Speaker 1: away the next day. And I didn't even know this,
6:51
Speaker 1: but they met him.
6:54
Speaker 3: And my grandma. She's not my real grandma, but I
6:56
Speaker 3: call her grandma.
6:56
Speaker 1: I think they met when I was like maybe two
6:59
Speaker 1: or something, and he had he was widowed and she
7:02
Speaker 1: was widowed, right, And they met on this sus dating
7:05
Speaker 1: website in like two thousand and two, really, and he
7:08
Speaker 1: said it was called like Lover's Bubble or something like that.
7:12
Speaker 1: There used to be so many have you heard of
7:13
Speaker 1: Ashley Madison.
7:14
Speaker 2: You've told me about this side, You've told me crazy
7:18
Speaker 2: and I don't believe how big it. God, it's a
7:20
Speaker 2: Netflix documentary. I highly recommend it. I was on the
7:22
Speaker 2: edge of my seat. But basically, what it is is
7:24
Speaker 2: a dating website for couples.
7:27
Speaker 1: Who want to cheat.
7:29
Speaker 2: So if you're in a relationship, because their theory is
7:31
Speaker 2: two people who are in relationships and want to cheat
7:34
Speaker 2: aren't going to snitch, so they pare them together and
7:37
Speaker 2: start snitching.
7:38
Speaker 1: I go say, good business model.
7:39
Speaker 2: But the algorithm got hacked and they and everybody started
7:42
Speaker 2: getting hacked and all these famous people coming out who's
7:45
Speaker 2: on the website, and all these relationships.
7:46
Speaker 1: Got like broken up, and el was crazy.
7:49
Speaker 2: It was like bigg and tinto one point the amount
7:50
Speaker 2: of money and they were making that much money.
7:52
Speaker 1: It was crazy.
7:53
Speaker 2: Is that it's not illegal what they were doing. No, No,
7:55
Speaker 2: that's fine. So everything was legal, but ethically terribly ethically bad.
7:59
Speaker 1: Yeah, beer honest. Yeah, but they're fully honest.
8:01
Speaker 3: Flut what they're doing.
8:02
Speaker 1: Yeah and yeah.
8:03
Speaker 2: And they were like banking on the It was just
8:04
Speaker 2: like a startup and they were like banking like we're
8:06
Speaker 2: so secure, this is the best thing ever. And it
8:08
Speaker 2: blew up and they never like fixed their service and
8:10
Speaker 2: then it was an.
8:11
Speaker 3: Easy server to hack.
8:12
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, the guy hacking it was like no firewall, rookies,
8:19
Speaker 1: no firewar. The is a firewall anyway.
8:24
Speaker 2: Things better have no business doing just checking wearing ankle socks.
8:29
Speaker 1: I do wear them sometimes, really, I wear them with joggers.
8:33
Speaker 1: I like wearing ankle socks with joggers. What about those
8:35
Speaker 1: ballet socks? What do they call it? Socketts? No, not
8:37
Speaker 1: a socket? Guy. I used to wear I used to
8:39
Speaker 1: wear so used to wear sockets. Let those ankles. I
8:41
Speaker 1: like the Lulu Lemon ankle socks.
8:43
Speaker 2: Yeah, let those ankles breathe, mate, I said, yeah, if
8:45
Speaker 2: I at the gym, and leave me the funk alone.
8:48
Speaker 1: I posted a story.
8:49
Speaker 2: Once, all right, yeah, And it was me walking down
8:52
Speaker 2: some stairs after leg day, right, And I was wearing
8:55
Speaker 2: ankle socks after leg day, right, And I had to
8:57
Speaker 2: choose on and I was walking down a bad day
9:00
Speaker 2: someone to swipe off and after a heavy leg day,
9:03
Speaker 2: and so I honestly like, it's pretty rare that I
9:05
Speaker 2: do go check my message requests and stuff.
9:08
Speaker 1: But I think I had obviously accepted a request from
9:10
Speaker 1: this person before about something, because in my general and
9:13
Speaker 1: I go in my general and there's a message in
9:14
Speaker 1: there and someone just wrote just refly to my story
9:17
Speaker 1: ankle socks. I was like, the fuck, I don't even
9:21
Speaker 1: know you. It's just someone that like is from the podcast.
9:26
Speaker 1: I like that persone put you in your place. That's
9:28
Speaker 1: where you deserve. A fucking hell things. Men have no
9:33
Speaker 1: business doing bottomless brunches. Oh why not, dude, I've never
9:38
Speaker 1: seen a group of guys at a bottomless brunch. Don't
9:40
Speaker 1: start trying to act like you go do that, you
9:42
Speaker 1: fucking lie, I would do. You fucking would not go
9:45
Speaker 1: to a.
9:45
Speaker 2: Bottomless Brunhters, is that what the bottomless brunch is?
9:49
Speaker 1: Like? Mimosass, that's what I would have one of them.
9:53
Speaker 1: A bit of orange juice. Orange juice, that's actually the
9:56
Speaker 1: actually they make champagne taste good. Yeah, half orange juice,
9:59
Speaker 1: half my share pain.
10:00
Speaker 2: I don't been to one, mate, what I was wrong?
10:02
Speaker 1: Yeah?
10:03
Speaker 2: Yeah, when did I ask things men have no business doing?
10:08
Speaker 2: Actually a good one, letting their girl open their own door.
10:12
Speaker 1: That's a really good one. As Jake would say, facts, facts,
10:16
Speaker 1: bro love that things men have no business doing.
10:21
Speaker 3: Drinking out of straws.
10:22
Speaker 2: Ah, mate, I love a little straw of a coke can.
10:28
Speaker 1: Yeah it's good.
10:29
Speaker 2: Maybe this is just like giving girls the egg. Okay,
10:33
Speaker 2: I want to test you of this one. Okay, can
10:35
Speaker 2: you pretend like you're driving a car right now?
10:37
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, give me a second.
10:38
Speaker 2: Okay, things men have no business doing? Driving with two hands.
10:53
Speaker 1: I don't know why I didn't do my natural driving
10:55
Speaker 1: position of one hands, because.
10:56
Speaker 4: You don't act like you do. I read you like
11:01
Speaker 4: a book there. I hate sitting far away from steering
11:07
Speaker 4: weel as well. Yeah, like I got it, you went on.
11:10
Speaker 1: He had my car for a couple of weeks because
11:11
Speaker 1: his cars are the Mechanic, and he dropped it back.
11:14
Speaker 1: I actually just like drove it to take it to
11:16
Speaker 1: the mechanic the other day and I got in and.
11:18
Speaker 3: I sat back, and I was.
11:19
Speaker 1: Like and like I could drive, and I was like,
11:22
Speaker 1: I just hate it, Like I like sitting up straight
11:24
Speaker 1: as fuck. Like I'm not. I'm not a lean back.
11:27
Speaker 1: I like sitting up straight as fuck, and like like
11:30
Speaker 1: my legs don't fully extend when I press on the
11:32
Speaker 1: clutch and ship.
11:33
Speaker 2: Really interesting, man, interesting things men have no business doing.
11:37
Speaker 1: Having a bubble bath guilty. I love that.
11:41
Speaker 2: I actually love bubbles of mine. Once I moved back
11:44
Speaker 2: to my parents, that was one thing I was looking
11:45
Speaker 2: forward to.
11:45
Speaker 1: We didn't have one.
11:46
Speaker 2: When we lived together.
11:47
Speaker 3: I don't have a bath.
11:47
Speaker 1: We don't have a we didn't have a bath. I
11:48
Speaker 1: have a bath. Love it.
11:49
Speaker 2: Bit of epsen cell It's a candle. If you're feeling
11:52
Speaker 2: yeahs do just like I don't know never to help
11:56
Speaker 2: the muscle really yeah? Yeah, no, no, I know, I
11:59
Speaker 2: think it's provenally.
12:00
Speaker 1: What is that? Like? Where do you get up someselves
12:01
Speaker 1: from just cols? How do you do to sale?
12:04
Speaker 2: Recently?
12:04
Speaker 1: Actually you get some yeahn no candles? Dad stocks up
12:08
Speaker 1: from him.
12:08
Speaker 2: It's actually good for his cancer because he gets twitches
12:12
Speaker 2: and I like relaxes his muscles. So yeah, we've got themselves.
12:14
Speaker 2: Today's mate, jemany candles. Yeah, I got a couple of canes.
12:21
Speaker 2: If I'm feeling like real adventures, I'll set the laptop up,
12:23
Speaker 2: watch a nice movie like put on a little Yeah,
12:25
Speaker 2: just zend out.
12:26
Speaker 1: Mate to me time. Fuck, I want a bar? Yeah,
12:29
Speaker 1: come over next place I get it's having a bar. Yeah.
12:32
Speaker 2: Okay, this is my last one. I think this is
12:35
Speaker 2: pretty funny coming from girls things men have no business doing.
12:39
Speaker 2: Being a gynecologist, I.
12:41
Speaker 1: Have always always thought that, Like, Okay, I've always thought
12:47
Speaker 1: a couple of things about different doctors. A guy choosing
12:52
Speaker 1: to be a gynocologist has always kind of rubbed me
12:54
Speaker 1: the wrong way. Okay, but I guess each a fair like. Yeah,
13:01
Speaker 1: the second thing, who decides to be like a butthole doctor?
13:06
Speaker 3: Because there is a thing a buttold's a literal such
13:09
Speaker 3: thing as a poop.
13:09
Speaker 2: What's the scientific term. I don't know, but there's like
13:14
Speaker 2: feces doctors number two, doctor number two. What about like
13:19
Speaker 2: a gastrologist that's a stomach doctor. That one kind of
13:23
Speaker 2: makes sense.
13:23
Speaker 1: But these things are just so niche. I suppose I
13:26
Speaker 1: just look at it as like it's another part of
13:27
Speaker 1: the body.
13:28
Speaker 2: Like what's the difference between stomach and a ma donna
13:30
Speaker 2: or stomach and a bumble?
13:31
Speaker 1: Well, I mean it's another part of the body, Yes,
13:34
Speaker 1: but like a poop doctor care just not for us.
13:38
Speaker 1: Let's be real here, Yeah, did you hear about Did
13:41
Speaker 1: I ever tell you about the documentary I watched? It
13:43
Speaker 1: was in like twenty twenty one. Before even start of
13:45
Speaker 1: the podcast, I've probably spoken about it.
13:48
Speaker 3: The guy that was a gynocologist.
13:52
Speaker 1: One of the things that acologist does is actually is
13:54
Speaker 1: like that does the impregnation.
13:55
Speaker 3: Of a woman via IVF. Maybe God, I don't.
13:59
Speaker 1: Want to be butchering any thing, but basically I don't
14:01
Speaker 1: remember what this thing was called. There was a Netflix
14:02
Speaker 1: documentary and this guy he was like a really good gunecologist, right,
14:06
Speaker 1: is this one where he came himself and he so
14:09
Speaker 1: he he had a gynecologist thing, and he said that
14:11
Speaker 1: there was a sperm sperm bank across the road. And
14:14
Speaker 1: then girls would go in. They'd be in his office
14:16
Speaker 1: or wherever, the little examination room, and he's like, they're like,
14:18
Speaker 1: all right, we're gonna inseeminate you. Yeah. Oh it was
14:20
Speaker 1: still like insemination via natural way. It wasn't IVF. Sorry,
14:22
Speaker 1: still in semination via a natural way. Were just like
14:24
Speaker 1: injecting it through like a tube into their vagina. Yeah,
14:26
Speaker 1: And he would say he's going to a sperm bank. No, no,
14:29
Speaker 1: exactly go into his office. Whoa wa wa waw ac. Yeah.
14:32
Speaker 2: Apparently in there's just like the eighties, apparently this is
14:35
Speaker 2: a huge thing the doctors would do because they'd make
14:37
Speaker 2: their interns do it because they didn't have access to
14:40
Speaker 2: a sperm bank. Dude, they fucking Finally a couple of
14:44
Speaker 2: these kids, right, someone's like wanting to find their real
14:46
Speaker 2: dad because they get told they, oh, we we did
14:49
Speaker 2: it this way.
14:49
Speaker 3: This isn't your real dad. He couldn't have kids, but
14:51
Speaker 3: we did it this way.
14:51
Speaker 1: Yeah, And so some kids want to go find their
14:53
Speaker 1: real dad and then they do twenty three and me,
14:54
Speaker 1: and then they find a brother or a.
14:55
Speaker 3: Sister blah blah blah blah.
14:57
Speaker 1: Right, yeah, and so then they get together and they're like,
14:58
Speaker 1: what the fucking They end up figuring that there's five
15:00
Speaker 1: of them with the same dad, and then they figure
15:03
Speaker 1: out that it's the gynecologist, and then they start doing
15:05
Speaker 1: more research. This guy has over one hundred kids, imagine that,
15:08
Speaker 1: and he makes bank from that. Hey, but it's the
15:11
Speaker 1: most illegal thing ever. Oh, Like, here's the thing, so
15:17
Speaker 1: like in your head, obviously like obviously saying to a girl,
15:20
Speaker 1: I'm going to a sperm maank to get the donor
15:22
Speaker 1: you chose because you choose a donut, yeah, photos and
15:24
Speaker 1: all that shit. You choose a donor, right, And then
15:26
Speaker 1: he's like, yeah, I'm going to get that donor's sperm. Yeah,
15:29
Speaker 1: warman up put it in. He whacks off, but his
15:32
Speaker 1: inside of you without consent. And then there was this
15:35
Speaker 1: whole thing of like a court case of them being
15:37
Speaker 1: like he fucking basically raped me, which is like fair, yeah,
15:42
Speaker 1: and there's no laws about it. There's laws about it
15:45
Speaker 1: now that it was discovered, but he was like the
15:47
Speaker 1: first person to get caught and so there was no
15:49
Speaker 1: laws about it. So he got.
15:52
Speaker 3: All he got was a five hundred dollar fine, no jail.
15:54
Speaker 1: Time, five hundred dollars, five hundred dollars fine.
15:57
Speaker 2: It's this Yeah, I suppose this is so that's wild
16:00
Speaker 2: and incomprehensible. The magnitude of that whole scenario.
16:04
Speaker 1: I had, like a business partner that had no idea
16:06
Speaker 1: what he was doing. Yeah, yeah, why no idea? What
16:12
Speaker 1: fucking crazier? Mentor mental mental? Mental? Alrighty guys, we do
16:20
Speaker 1: want a dilemma, you know what to do.
16:23
Speaker 3: In the description of this episode, there's a link to dilemmas.
16:26
Speaker 1: You can submit there. They're all anonymous, or through the
16:29
Speaker 1: Instagram biography. Big word for you, man, i'ming pulling out
16:33
Speaker 1: the big ones hypothetically speaking that you actually want to Okay, Hey,
16:38
Speaker 1: I recently discovered the pod and love it.
16:41
Speaker 3: Here's my problem.
16:42
Speaker 1: I'm twenty seven and got out of a five year
16:44
Speaker 1: long relationship about a year ago. I decided I wanted
16:47
Speaker 1: to say, stay single for a while and enjoy my
16:50
Speaker 1: own company. With that being said, I feel like I'm
16:53
Speaker 1: a very sexual person and have needs. I don't like
16:57
Speaker 1: the one night's stand concept because I don't want to
17:00
Speaker 1: be physically intimate with what is essentially a stranger. So
17:04
Speaker 1: after about two months of my breakup, I started recommunicating
17:09
Speaker 1: with an old situationship and we started hooking up again.
17:13
Speaker 1: He is actually the best I've ever had and the
17:15
Speaker 1: physical harmony is great, so we kept it for a
17:19
Speaker 1: few months, but he recently started to pull away and
17:23
Speaker 1: I feel like he's not interested in the concept anymore.
17:26
Speaker 1: He has never been the committed relationship person and I
17:30
Speaker 1: know that, and honestly, that was one of the main
17:32
Speaker 1: reasons why I wanted to reconnect with him.
17:35
Speaker 3: So My question is do you think he somehow got the.
17:38
Speaker 1: Idea that I want things to move towards a more
17:41
Speaker 1: emotional level and got scared, which I really am not,
17:45
Speaker 1: or he's just not attracted to me anymore. I really
17:48
Speaker 1: truly just want the mind blowing action he offers and
17:52
Speaker 1: looks like your girl just isn't getting any So how
17:55
Speaker 1: do I approach this? Interesting?
17:58
Speaker 2: I love how she said physical harmony?
18:00
Speaker 3: Yeah that's my think.
18:02
Speaker 2: Yeah harmony? What was that like?
18:06
Speaker 1: Actually that's a I would love to know physical Harmony's kidding?
18:10
Speaker 2: Yeah, we get a physical harm to each other, mate,
18:13
Speaker 2: don't you So she wants to win him back essentially
18:18
Speaker 2: or get equipment of the equivalent sex back.
18:22
Speaker 3: Does she miss him because she likes him?
18:25
Speaker 1: Maybe? I think?
18:27
Speaker 2: But does she just miss the sex? Like it's good?
18:29
Speaker 2: Sex is hard to come by these days.
18:31
Speaker 3: Mate, It's a good point.
18:32
Speaker 2: Those guys on e harmony aren't always the best love
18:35
Speaker 2: bubble dot com mate, those guys aren't. How do we
18:41
Speaker 2: help her, like, are we trying to give her advice
18:42
Speaker 2: to saying like move on, or we're actually trying to
18:44
Speaker 2: help her like get him back?
18:47
Speaker 1: Yeah?
18:47
Speaker 2: Look, you cannot like if you genuinely don't think you
18:49
Speaker 2: want anything. I think this ship sailed if you're being honest, Look,
18:53
Speaker 2: let's be really you could just message him and say, yo,
18:56
Speaker 2: what happened? Like I still want to have sex? Or
18:59
Speaker 2: does maybe I've deeped a little bit? Does she want closure?
19:02
Speaker 2: Because she does, like she needs a reason why she
19:05
Speaker 2: distanced himself because she can't.
19:08
Speaker 1: Yeah, actually, wait, you kind of got what you wanted. Yeah,
19:10
Speaker 1: a couple of months, Like how long did you expect
19:12
Speaker 1: this to last?
19:13
Speaker 2: But he's just gone all ghost cast with the ghost
19:15
Speaker 2: and now she didn't get closure because she liked him
19:18
Speaker 2: or so from even messaging her. She thinks she's getting
19:22
Speaker 2: sex back, but realistically she's getting closure or sex and
19:26
Speaker 2: the relationship is back on the carts.
19:29
Speaker 3: Yeah, like she upset that she isn't like she wanted
19:32
Speaker 3: to be doing the ghosting.
19:33
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe maybe maybe we'll throw her there maybe who knows.
19:39
Speaker 2: I think it's quite a simple answer if you asked me,
19:41
Speaker 2: like you.
19:41
Speaker 1: Probably just should like leave it to be fair, because
19:44
Speaker 1: how like how far can something like how long can
19:47
Speaker 1: you go without getting attached? Like really be honest with yourself?
19:50
Speaker 2: We said it like unless you're having sex, Like once
19:53
Speaker 2: every couple of months. You can't really do it, no, Yeah,
19:57
Speaker 2: you can't wait a.
19:58
Speaker 1: Couple months and hit him up again. Yeah, exactly.
20:01
Speaker 3: That's the thing.
20:01
Speaker 1: Really, if you guys are having some like somewhat consistent sex,
20:04
Speaker 1: you know, two, three, four times a month, which is
20:08
Speaker 1: she said physical harmony, you know what it really was?
20:11
Speaker 1: Emotional connection. Emotional harmony mate.
20:13
Speaker 2: Yeah.
20:16
Speaker 1: Fuck, and you were making love.
20:17
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's why you loved it so much, because you
20:19
Speaker 4: were just like, I need him back, so I reckon,
20:23
Speaker 4: here we go.
20:24
Speaker 2: She was in a relationship for five years. Now, this
20:27
Speaker 2: guy's given her the best sex. To be fair, maybe
20:31
Speaker 2: the guy you were with with so long wasn't great
20:34
Speaker 2: at it, so you think this was the best. Here's
20:36
Speaker 2: a great time to go experience the more dudes.
20:39
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you don't have to have one night stands. No,
20:42
Speaker 1: but you can go and make a profile on any
20:45
Speaker 1: dating up and say you're looking.
20:46
Speaker 3: For something casual.
20:47
Speaker 1: You can just you can still date like date and
20:49
Speaker 1: say like, I'm just not looking for anything serious. Yeah, Like,
20:51
Speaker 1: he's the thing. You don't like the thought of having
20:53
Speaker 1: sex with someone who isn't essentially a stranger. Yeah, but
20:57
Speaker 1: you got dating app or you could hit someone up
20:59
Speaker 1: and you can go a date or two. You can
21:01
Speaker 1: be honest about what you want from this situation, and
21:04
Speaker 1: then after a couple of dates, you.
21:05
Speaker 2: Can whether you can you're no longer a stranger. Yeah,
21:08
Speaker 2: except giving you insight. Be very careful because men of
21:11
Speaker 2: trash and they'll be like, yeah, sex, I'm going to
21:13
Speaker 2: use it our but be responsible with your emotions and
21:18
Speaker 2: who you open up to, and make sure they're in
21:20
Speaker 2: this actually in the same way length as you're not
21:21
Speaker 2: telling you just what you want to hear.
21:23
Speaker 1: Yep, but I think this is a good time.
21:25
Speaker 2: I think our unprofessional opinion would be move on, go
21:29
Speaker 2: find some more sex and see if it was that good,
21:31
Speaker 2: because I I well bet on the fact that you'd
21:34
Speaker 2: probably find some better message.
21:36
Speaker 1: But you've got any friends, you might know his friends
21:38
Speaker 1: or hit one of your friends up. Yeah you know them,
21:40
Speaker 1: they're not strangers. Yeah yeah, true, true too, But we
21:43
Speaker 1: don't advocate friends with benefits. Yeah I know. But like,
21:46
Speaker 1: just hit someone up that you know, not that you
21:48
Speaker 1: actually are like properly friends with him, like you hang
21:50
Speaker 1: out with Oh yeah true yeah yeah yeah, yeah, yeah,
21:52
Speaker 1: you're friends of a friend. Yeah, just hit a dude
21:54
Speaker 1: up that you've known for a while, but you're like, yeah,
21:56
Speaker 1: a friend of a friend. I'll tell you what. There's
21:58
Speaker 1: no nicer feeling. Then.
21:59
Speaker 2: Dudes don't get m no, not at all, and like
22:02
Speaker 2: you might think it's ballsy or you're doing too much,
22:04
Speaker 2: you're coming on too strong. No wrong makes a guy feel.
22:07
Speaker 2: Guys like to feel a bit cute and special, sometimes too,
22:09
Speaker 2: like if they go if some guys like I don't
22:11
Speaker 2: at work all day, has an a girl message him
22:14
Speaker 2: in months and he saw a message saying like, hey,
22:16
Speaker 2: what have you been up to?
22:17
Speaker 1: I'd be like, hi, fuck, it is a good day.
22:19
Speaker 1: I'm going to remember this day.
22:20
Speaker 3: Good point. Here's another question for you.
22:23
Speaker 1: So she was in a relationship for five years, right,
22:27
Speaker 1: Only a couple of months after the relationship she realized
22:30
Speaker 1: I've got needs. I'm a sexual lady. Yeah, fair enough, Yes, yeah,
22:34
Speaker 1: we all laugh. So she reaches out to a next situationship. Okay,
22:38
Speaker 1: first off, I want to know how you got involved
22:39
Speaker 1: with that situationship if he's not stranger, okay, but none
22:42
Speaker 1: of that okay. Secondly, secondly, it's a bit soon to
22:47
Speaker 1: start like kind of sleeping with someone like consistently because
22:50
Speaker 1: your body is still getting over the breakup. So maybe
22:58
Speaker 1: good point you bring up how long do you wait though,
23:02
Speaker 1: because I don't know. I just think so going into
23:04
Speaker 1: something consistent it is kind of just like moving on
23:07
Speaker 1: and trying to not really get over, not dealing with
23:11
Speaker 1: the emotions that you broke up with this guy you
23:13
Speaker 1: just like sort of especially because you now want to
23:15
Speaker 1: get him back to the situationship. It's now it's sort
23:17
Speaker 1: of like a band aid situation to break up.
23:19
Speaker 2: This is a great point, like maybe he was just
23:21
Speaker 2: like a little cover up for all the emotions you
23:25
Speaker 2: had for your past relationship.
23:26
Speaker 1: Fucker's gone deep there. Yeah, now they're all coming back out,
23:29
Speaker 1: and your solution is I want him back. Fuck, we
23:33
Speaker 1: figured it out. We figured out. Wow, we got there
23:37
Speaker 1: and there.
23:37
Speaker 2: We just got to talk to each other.
23:38
Speaker 1: A PhD. I swear, give us a PhD in ecology.
23:44
Speaker 1: Now I've got to be a poop. I think you'd
23:46
Speaker 1: rather be a I think we've done something. At least
23:51
Speaker 1: we did something there. If we didn't help you, I
23:53
Speaker 1: don't know what. Well.
23:59
Speaker 2: Okay, hey guys, we're about to play on Jake's humor
24:03
Speaker 2: right now. A couple of weeks ago, he came to.
24:06
Speaker 2: It was Patreon, I think I don't remember, and it
24:08
Speaker 2: did so good. This is one of Jake's threads that
24:10
Speaker 2: he loves, and I went behind the scenes and went
24:12
Speaker 2: and found some that I thought he might laugh too.
24:15
Speaker 2: So this is I love getting sweet messages. I just
24:18
Speaker 2: keep rereading them. Yeah, and then mate, when I was
24:22
Speaker 2: finding these, I was like, some of these are too
24:23
Speaker 2: bad to bring on the pot.
24:24
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I've done that. When I was looking for him,
24:26
Speaker 3: I'm some of that you can't bring on it.
24:28
Speaker 2: But what I've done, I think I've got four or
24:30
Speaker 2: five bad ones. My mon come back with some nice
24:31
Speaker 2: ones actually after Oh okay, yeah, I like that. Okay,
24:35
Speaker 2: So I love getting sweet messages. I just keep rereading them.
24:38
Speaker 1: Him.
24:39
Speaker 2: I'm going home right now. Her nice nice Him, you're
24:44
Speaker 2: talking like a man who says that you're supposed to
24:47
Speaker 2: say sligh or something. And the comments on this one,
24:54
Speaker 2: we're like, this is what all her responses should have been.
24:57
Speaker 1: What do you want? Okay, girlie? Pop you ate that
25:02
Speaker 1: pop off? Quinn?
25:03
Speaker 2: Yeah, this girl, tell them, tell them all. Okay, next one.
25:09
Speaker 2: This is girl to a girl. I love getting sweet messages.
25:12
Speaker 2: I just keep rereading them.
25:13
Speaker 1: Her.
25:14
Speaker 2: Hey, girl, so I've heard you've been texting my ex
25:17
Speaker 2: her back. Hi, girl, I heard you cheated on him.
25:20
Speaker 2: I guess we're both hearing things. Girls are smart, like
25:36
Speaker 2: squick with it.
25:37
Speaker 1: Hey yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah.
25:41
Speaker 2: I love getting sweet messages. I just keep rereading them.
25:45
Speaker 1: Her, I woke up sick.
25:47
Speaker 3: Him?
25:48
Speaker 2: How her sick from all the bitches you follow.
25:53
Speaker 3: Him?
25:54
Speaker 1: Bro, dude, stop for real.
25:59
Speaker 2: Those are my failure, my favorite one. This one might
26:04
Speaker 2: be the most wild. It might take you a second
26:08
Speaker 2: to get okay, but this one's wild. Okay, Okay, I
26:12
Speaker 2: can't believe men sometimes, Okay, okay. I love getting sweet messages.
26:16
Speaker 2: I just keep rereading them. Her, I got my period.
26:21
Speaker 2: Him vampire emoji. Call me Edwards like this might be
26:34
Speaker 2: the worst. I call you Edwards, this might be the
26:38
Speaker 2: worst one.
26:40
Speaker 1: Him.
26:40
Speaker 2: She kind of looks like you her. Yeah, she does him.
26:45
Speaker 2: That's why I asked her to.
26:46
Speaker 1: Suck my context. What Okay? Okay?
27:00
Speaker 2: This this one's this one's and so it's pretty good,
27:03
Speaker 2: I think him. Why are you looking for a slutty
27:06
Speaker 2: costume for Halloween when you're a whole year round?
27:10
Speaker 1: Her?
27:11
Speaker 2: It must be refreshing to know you don't have to
27:13
Speaker 2: buy her costume, since you're always a clown, her continued,
27:18
Speaker 2: Or you could go as commitment, since that always seems
27:22
Speaker 2: to scare you. My him, I literally hate you her,
27:28
Speaker 2: and I literally hate that I dated someone who has
27:30
Speaker 2: built like a string bean.
27:41
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, and they were all really mean.
27:45
Speaker 2: So I'm going to bring I'm going to bring it
27:47
Speaker 2: back with a little bit of wholesome, this wholesomebody love.
27:50
Speaker 1: So him, I love you her. You probably say that
27:54
Speaker 1: to everyone him, Yes, her? What do you mean? Yes, him?
28:00
Speaker 1: I do tell everyone that I love you. Oh that's cute.
28:05
Speaker 2: This one might be your favorite. No, but another nice one.
28:08
Speaker 1: Her.
28:09
Speaker 2: We broke up literally a year ago. Can you please
28:11
Speaker 2: stop playing chess with my dad or a messenger? It's
28:14
Speaker 2: disgusting him. Just because I lost the queen doesn't mean
28:18
Speaker 2: I have to give up on the king that was good,
28:23
Speaker 2: Like that ship, Dad was a king. I love getting
28:27
Speaker 2: sweet messageres. I just keep rereading them.
28:28
Speaker 3: Oh they're just so good.
28:30
Speaker 1: They were good. Oh when I was based.
28:31
Speaker 2: Actually them kind of hard to find. I think we're out. Yeah, yeah,
28:35
Speaker 2: I'm milk today.
28:36
Speaker 1: I fucking I got the nipple and I fucking milk
28:38
Speaker 1: That shit hard when I was looking for him. They
28:41
Speaker 1: make me laugh so much.
28:42
Speaker 2: But we said it last time, we said it on patrons,
28:44
Speaker 2: so it's better to stay on this episode. Any GIRLI
28:46
Speaker 2: pops find their self at trash dude and want to
28:49
Speaker 2: play with him a.
28:49
Speaker 1: Little bit, probably don't advocate it.
28:51
Speaker 2: But if you want to have a little bit of
28:52
Speaker 2: fun and send it to us, I fully advocate if
28:55
Speaker 2: he If a guy is I was saying any of
28:59
Speaker 2: those terrible.
28:59
Speaker 1: Things, how many actually, like? Seriously, how often do girls
29:05
Speaker 1: get just.
29:05
Speaker 3: Like a pickup line?
29:06
Speaker 1: DM? Surely often, I reckon, Yeah, it's got to be often.
29:09
Speaker 1: Once a week. Go look at the requests, lady, Yeah,
29:12
Speaker 1: go look for this shit and just I don't know,
29:15
Speaker 1: just say something mean as fuck back. It's any of the.
29:18
Speaker 2: Ones that like sexualize you in any way or any
29:21
Speaker 2: let's put him in his place. Fuck yeah, teach you
29:23
Speaker 2: a lesson latable school. All right, everybody, thank you very
29:31
Speaker 2: much for listening. If you have enjoyed the episode and
29:34
Speaker 2: got this far, I think would be the perfect time
29:37
Speaker 2: to share the episode on your Instagram story right now
29:40
Speaker 2: whilst you're doing that hot girl walk.
29:41
Speaker 3: Yeah, if you're on a hot girl walk, don't forget.
29:43
Speaker 2: Share on the Instagram tag Jake and I Personal. We'll
29:45
Speaker 2: really share it if you get lucky. Otherwise, we love
29:48
Speaker 2: you and thanks for tuning in once again, Thank you
29:50
Speaker 2: so much.
29:50
Speaker 1: See your eight