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Public Speaking With Confidence & Authenticity with Leslie Fiorenzo · The One Small Change Podcast

0:00
Welcome to this week's edition of The One Small Change. You know
0:04
that I believe that life is a journey, and the best way to go through
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a journey is to explore. And this journey is 1 that's gonna
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help to help with your transformation. I'm your host, Yvonne
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McCoy, and I bring over 30 years of entrepreneurial spirit
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and experience to discovering growth through the power of
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seemingly small changes. So thank you for joining me
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and coming on this journey with me. And this week, we are
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talking with Leslie Forrenco, and
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she's gonna share a small unexpected or insignificant
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decision that sparked a remarkable transformation and growth One
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maybe had an effect on both her business and her personal life. So,
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Leslie, thank you for taking this time out of your busy
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schedule to share with me and my audience. Thank you,
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Yvonne. It's my pleasure to be here. So tell
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us, we're we're all dying to know what you do and what was the
1:00
small change that that made you go in that
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direction. Well, for me, it was how I start
1:07
my day. So I worked with a coach, and 1 of
1:11
her 1 of the components in her coaching program
1:15
was your morning routine. To win the morning, win
1:19
the day, that kind of idea. And so, really,
1:24
the first hour of the day
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is most impactful, at least in my opinion, now that I've learned this and
1:32
One learned to apply it. So 20 minutes
1:36
of reflection, meditation, prayer, whatever you wanna call
1:39
it, 20 minutes of stretching, exercise,
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and then 20 minutes of planning, thinking about my day, who I'm gonna connect
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with, how I wanna show up. Those 3 segments
1:51
in that first hour have made a tremendous
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positive impact for me. And and, you know, I
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think people underestimate. I mean, this is not an
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an idea that's new. I often say there aren't too many new ideas under the
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sun, because there was, a while ago,
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there was, you know, the the all the rage was the power hour. Yes.
2:13
You know? The there was 1 about the
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journey where you you journal the first thing in the morning. But I think,
2:20
you know, the essence of it is that it just gets
2:24
you focused, you know, so that you can
2:28
actually accomplish something. And if you're, you know, if you use
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that to I mean, you know, I often say to people,
2:35
you know, it can be as simple as saying, what am I doing today
2:39
to build my business and and and have the life I want?
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Yeah. You know? It doesn't always take a whole hour.
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So tell me tell me how that got you focused on your business.
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Well, The 20 minutes of preparation is
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what do I need to accomplish, who am I connecting with, What else
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do I need to do? I think the challenge that many entrepreneurs face, Yvonne,
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and I know this is your expertise, so you probably have some insight into The.
3:06
But there's so much we could do, so many things
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we want to do, and how do I fit that all in?
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So if I'm focused on what are the 3 things
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that I absolutely need to do today, and and if I
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get those 3 things One, I mean, that's what I wanna do first thing. That's
3:25
what I Yvonne attack. So going forward with The?
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Well, I think, you know, I I think the other thing is not only
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as entrepreneur do we have shiny
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object syndrome. Right? I think from a
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society point of view, we are you
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know, I say this almost every every podcast. So if you've heard it once,
3:48
you've probably heard it a bazillion times. Buckminster Fuller says
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we're all born geniuses One that it's educated out of us. And that's
3:55
because our our education was built
3:59
to develop people who could follow instructions and
4:03
and and be managed. It was not built for people to be
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creative and to be entrepreneurs. Yeah. And so
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everything that you learned in school about how to
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do things, is to your detriment as an
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entrepreneur. So, Leslie, tell us what you actually do in your business
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The this helps. So, Yvonne, I work with coaches
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who are reluctant or fearful of
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public speaking, creating video content, and networking. Frame
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it,
4:38
One The
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them change their inner critic to an inner
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And One And so how does that practice that you talked about,
4:57
help help your clients or can help anybody? Because I
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agree with you. First of all, I think, we wouldn't see
5:04
headlines like, are you the best kept secret? You know, that
5:08
kind of thing. If we weren't, I mean, again, from the educational
5:12
perspective, we're we're told to be part of a team. We're told
5:16
to, you know and as children, we're told to sit down and be quiet. You
5:19
know? And I often say in my story, it was
5:23
during a lot of civil rights upheaval. And so I
5:27
was always told you had to be the best, but you couldn't stand out. You
5:30
couldn't draw attention to yourself, which is kind of a hard thing to do
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That's right. To do both. You know? So how do your people use that
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to overcome some of their limiting beliefs? Well,
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first of all, it's understanding that the feelings of
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confidence come second. You have to take action first. If you
5:50
wait for confidence to show up, you're Yvonne be waiting
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The rest of your life. It's not gonna happen. You've just got it. Like, I
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always say, copy Nike's mantra, just
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do it. So get out there, put yourself out there One
6:05
small steps. So if your goal is
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to present at your industry conference let's say you're an accountant
6:13
One you wanna present at your industry conference,
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Small, what's 1 thing you can do to move
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yourself in that direction? Because because most likely, you're not
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gonna call up that meeting planner and say, hey. I wanna present at your you
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know, I wanna be the keynote. I have no experience, but I'm gonna be the
6:30
best keynote you've ever heard. You're probably gonna say, I don't
6:34
think so. I want some backup. I want some proof. So what's 1 thing I
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could do to get that proof? And who can I connect with? Who
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needs to help me? 1 of the challenges I think, Yvonne, that
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entrepreneurs face is this idea that we need to go
6:49
it alone, and we don't. We need The continue. We
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need supporters. We need to be able to reach out and say,
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hey. Who do you know that might be helpful to me? How can
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I make this work? Those kinds of questions. And so
7:04
creating a community around yourself to help you. And I
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know you're a big proponent of that. I know you've been working towards that.
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I I have you've said so many things that, you know,
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I'm I'm gonna try not to take your time.
7:19
So the first thing is the thing about going
7:23
it alone. I don't know why I mean, I wish I had learned this
7:26
lesson decades ago. I think it comes from, you know, the whole
7:30
thing I am woman, hear me roar, I can do everything nonsense.
7:33
Right? Yeah. And, you know, I kinda felt like
7:37
community you had to be good at what you did before you went to a
7:40
community so you could give to the community, which is
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absolutely asked backwards. You go to a community when you when
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you're first starting out so that you can start to understand
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if that's really even the right direction to go.
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And you will find that you if you feel comfortable there
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and things click and you're getting the help that you want, then you're in the
8:03
right place. So that's the first thing that you absolutely do not have to
8:07
go it alone. Your learning curve will be much shorter,
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whatever. The other thing that you talked about is
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is kind of that it's not perfection, it's Podcast, you know,
8:18
progress. And I think, you know, for me, that's why I think it's so
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important to have what I you know, I talk about your vision as being dead
8:25
reckoning, that sailing term. You pick something that's far out because
8:29
you know you have to take steps along the way and adjust.
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And so, you know, if you decide you wanna talk, you
8:37
can start by doing a 5 minute live on Facebook, and
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then you can do something else, and then you can do a half an hour
8:44
or whatever, and then you can do a, you know, a webinar. And if you
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make your own stage, you can do it any way
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you want to, which is your uniqueness will shine because it's the
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way you want it to do. And I think,
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you know, I I think 1 of the things that
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was hard for me to to get my head around, so I'd like
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you to speak to The, is how important is
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building trust and authenticity over
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content? I think, especially in
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this day and age with all of the buzz about
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AI, people want to connect with real
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people. The challenge that I think social media
9:30
has presented to us is people put their best
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face forward, if you will, but they also put things that are
9:38
artificial. We wanna look good. We wanna have this I I read
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this on a I believe it was on a post
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that someone watched a mom, a young mom with her
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little, I don't know, maybe 18 One under
9:52
3, posing her on the beach,
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and the poor could couldn't play in the sand. She kept I mean, it was
10:00
like The all the little girls wanted to do was play, and the mom was
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trying to take these curated photos. We have
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people want reality. Maybe that's why reality
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TV is so popular. I'm not sure. Most of those I don't
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watch a lot of them. Me either. But I think it that's
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I think that's what people are after. Well, I think the other
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thing is The is so much information
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that's already out there. They don't actually need you so much for information
10:29
as they need you for implementation. They need to know
10:33
how to use the information. And I
10:37
think, you know, again, from that model of, you know, be part of a
10:40
team, do it the way we all do it, there
10:44
is you know, people don't
10:48
realize that they can adjust stuff so that it works for them. I you know,
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I say you do the right thing in the right reason, the right way, it's
10:54
right time, and it's right for you. Mhmm. And so, you know,
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I I'll share my story that I did a workshop once. I,
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you know, I did my monthly workshop, and 1 of my clients
11:06
was my wing person who was letting people in and that kind of stuff. And
11:09
afterwards, she said, I don't know how to say this
11:12
except to be really blunt. The person that showed up and
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presented that workshop is not the person I love working with.
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Interesting. He said, I I don't you know, I what I see you know,
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you're not even paying attention to the chat or talking to the peep. You're
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just, like, going, like, at full speed just, you know, putting
11:32
facts and information and stuff. And and so somebody,
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you know, graciously redid my workshop for me, and it had,
11:40
like, 78 slides. And I'm like, I'm not doing this. You
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know, IIII went to 50 some slides and down
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to 20, and now I think I'm down to 9. Because I
11:51
pay more attention to the audience when I do that, and I have exercises
11:55
that I want them to do. And so it you don't have to
11:58
sound like everybody else. You don't have to look like everybody
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else. And, you know, the authenticity I mean,
12:06
the last 3 clients that I got said to me,
12:10
you know, I got such good feelings from you. I
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really trust you, which is what I'm trying to, you know, get across.
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And it's like, it's working. It's working. So I
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think even when you are,
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talk about the things people can do to bring that authenticity out The
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whether it's in social media, in speaking,
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whatever. Well, I I think having someone who's going
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to be honest with you just like your colleague was was
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brutally One, and I know that happened for me. It happened to
12:45
be my stepdaughter, and we were at a family function. And
12:48
I was think I was calling bingo or leading some game at a
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shower. She afterwards, she's, why did you do that? I said, do
12:55
what? She was, you were so fake up there. What's with
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that? Like, what? I mean, I it was a big
13:03
moment for me. And looking back, I was like, yeah. I was trying to
13:07
anyway. So being real, having someone
13:11
who will be honest with you. But then you've talked about the
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the process, and I think it's doing it over and
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over and refining. So are we gonna be
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well, we're never gonna be perfect. Are we gonna be excellent out of the gate?
13:27
Maybe not. But striving for excellence, and
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what's 1 thing I could do to level up? What's
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1 small change I could make, 1 tweak, whatever you wanna
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call The, next time I do this so that it
13:41
just gets a little bit better? I don't know if I'm a
13:45
big fan of James Clear and his work atomic habits,
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and he talks about just 1% better every day gets you
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this exponential increase,
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and I think that's really true. We sometimes
14:00
look to say, well, I I want this goal, and it's out here. I wanna
14:03
just jump out there. It's not gonna happen. It's what if you
14:07
look at any athlete, right, they their preparation,
14:12
their, I'm
14:15
the word I want is not coming to me, but that taking small
14:19
steps and practicing and doing that over and over,
14:23
a lot of times it gets boring. And I have to do this
14:26
again? Yeah. You do. Well, you know, it's funny
14:30
because when I decided to do my monthly workshop, when I heard the idea of
14:34
doing the same workshop every month, I was like, oh my god. This
14:38
is gonna be so boring. Who's gonna wanna come to this? Right? Uh-huh.
14:41
And what I realized was Yvonne though the
14:45
framework was the same, the
14:49
for me, the stories and stuff are different. I mean, some of them are always
14:52
the same, but depending on what kind of mood I'm in, depending on what who
14:56
shows up. I mean, because 1 of the lessons that I learned
14:59
very early on because I did workforce development, and I had to go in and
15:03
do training, you know, in companies. Right? And I'd say, you know, what
15:06
do you think you're gonna get? And they were like, I don't know. And I'd
15:10
say, well, what would you well, you know, why are you here? Because they told
15:13
me I had to be. I'm like, okay. This is gonna be a winner. Right?
15:18
So I would say, alright. This is what I'm gonna be training
15:22
on. What would you like how would you like to use this in
15:26
your life so it'll improve your life?
15:29
Right? And then they got a buy in. So I you know,
15:33
for me, it's always like I kinda, you know, try to make the examples
15:36
match the audience that I've got as much as I can. You know,
15:40
acknowledging sometimes I don't know anything about that, you
15:44
know, And and and and being honest. I mean, I you know,
15:48
1 of 1 of my goals is that after I talk to you,
15:51
once we've talked together, that you leave better
15:55
than when we, you know, The we've than when we met. And,
15:59
so I had a guy that did a did a follow-up phone call One I
16:02
said, well, what, you know, what kind of business are you trying to put together?
16:04
And he said, farming. And I was like, oh my god. This is
16:08
gonna break my streak. I know nothing about farming.
16:13
But it turned out that once we got into it and once we dug into
16:16
it, it turned out that he was interested in aquaponics. And I actually
16:20
do know something about The. But more importantly,
16:24
he had come out of the service and had a background
16:29
in global and The, logistics, shipping
16:32
things. And, you know, we kinda started talking about, you know, all kinds of
16:36
stuff. And by the time he, you know, was gone, he was, like, really excited
16:39
about it. I was like, yes. You know? And so I think that
16:43
it's important, One, to acknowledge that you don't know everything.
16:47
Exactly. You know, if I used to say to my teachers, if you put yourself
16:50
on a pedestal, you're gonna get knocked off. I mean, you
16:54
know, so don't go there. I my thing is I don't know everything.
16:59
If you but you can ask anything, and we'll find the answer
17:02
together. Exactly. You know? So,
17:06
again, what other things can make you seem
17:10
more authentic? I mean, I have people say 1 of the things
17:14
models that I like is that I say, what other things
17:18
are do you like to do in your life besides business? So
17:22
mine is humor, weight loss, my family, and my
17:25
dog. Right? And so some of the
17:29
analogies that I give when I'm telling stories or doing
17:32
lessons have to do with those things. Like, so I have a post that's like
17:36
The dog that caught the car. You know? And
17:40
it's about, you know, you want more clients. Suddenly, you have more clients, but you
17:43
don't have the infrastructure to handle it. Yeah.
17:47
You know? So what kinda ideas do you have about things like that?
17:51
So, it is about thinking thinking
17:55
through. The the question I think that, we often
17:59
think in worst case scenarios. Yes. So when that
18:03
happens or or the question to ask is,
18:07
how would you handle it? If if that worst case so
18:11
you're on stage, and you totally lose your
18:14
place. What's the worst thing that's can happen?
18:19
Are they gonna boo you? Well, maybe. Most audiences are pretty
18:22
kind these days. They're not gonna throw rotten tomatoes at you. But, again, if
18:26
that happened, what's the worst thing that could happen, and how are you gonna
18:30
deal with it? So The other example that goes along
18:34
with that is if you were planning an outdoor wedding
18:37
in September, depending on where you live, I suppose if you're in
18:41
the south of the equator is different. But what's the
18:45
worst if it rains? What what would happen? Well, I can get a tent. Like,
18:48
what's my plan b if the worst case scenario happens? So thinking about
18:52
The, if I put a post out, if I make a video One
18:57
no 1 comments on it, What's the worst?
19:00
No no 1 commented on it. Okay. Does that mean no 1
19:04
liked it? No 1 maybe they didn't see it. It's The algorithms
19:08
of Facebook and LinkedIn and all The, like, kinds of things
19:11
always change. Who knows? Don't
19:15
let that stop you. Avoid letting that stop you.
19:19
So I just said the word don't. I changed it to avoid.
19:23
I'm really aware of language because language
19:27
can be so powerful. And years ago, probably in the
19:32
I'm not sure when the book was published. I'm gonna say late nineties, early 2000
19:35
maybe. There's a gentleman that wrote a book who is now
19:39
deceased, but don't no.
19:43
Remember the ice. The story is he went into a convenience
19:47
store in Phoenix, Arizona, the 4th July, and asked the young
19:51
man behind the counter, how's how are ice sales? And the kid's like, you know,
19:54
they're not really great, which is surprising because it's so hot to you know? And
19:58
the gentleman behind him on the counter,
20:01
don't forget the ice. He said, let me just change
20:05
that sign for you. And he crossed out the word don't and put the
20:09
word remember because our brain does
20:12
not hear that. So it was subconscious message,
20:16
forget the ice. So when it said remember oh,
20:20
we hear remember the ice? Oh, yeah. So avoid
20:24
those kinds of just the power in language. I
20:28
get to, I choose to, I want to
20:32
instead of have to, must, and should. Also also, I
20:35
think One that same thing is, you know, when I
20:39
taught money management, people would say, well, I I, you know, I can
20:43
only save a dollar. And I'd say, don't say only.
20:47
Say, I'm a saver. I saved The dollar. Yeah. Right?
20:51
It's not the quantity necessary the quantity as it is the
20:54
characteristic and the action that you want to
20:58
embed in what you're doing. And so, you know, I always say The
21:02
there are couple things that I say when I'm speaking. One is,
21:05
even though I know my material, I'm always I I
21:09
won't say nervous, but, you know, you know, how how can I make it
21:13
better? And I always say that's a good thing because if I don't feel
21:17
that way, then I don't really care. Mhmm. I'm not I'm not trying
21:20
to do my best. I'm like, I'm just I'm just wing it Small,
21:24
whatever. Right? So that to me is a good thing.
21:28
The other thing is that
21:32
I always do my presentation in a way that I feel like
21:37
like I said to you before, I try to connect with the audience so it's
21:40
relevant and give them a chance to, you know,
21:44
to do some feedback. But I have to tell you, I did I in 9th
21:47
grade, I did get up to give a talk One for the National Honor
21:51
Society, and the drama teacher pounded it and made
21:55
us rehearse. And I did a get up there and go blank.
22:00
And I did the first, like,
22:03
phrase One I ran out of breath or whatever, and
22:07
I don't remember seeing the audience. I don't remember being on the
22:11
stage. I just remember leaving and crying.
22:15
And she said to me, she said,
22:19
that was great. I mean, I was like, what do you mean that was great?
22:23
She said, nobody knew that you didn't give your prepared speech.
22:26
Exactly. And after that, I never memorized my speech.
22:31
Nobody knows what you're gonna say. Right. And so if you make a mistake, if
22:35
you change some words, if you don't say exactly what you had
22:38
intended, oh, well. As I mean, as long as you don't use
22:42
profanity, although I know in some groups that's accepted, but I don't
22:46
think Well, I think and I think the other thing
22:49
is, you know, when you're talking to people,
22:54
you know, you just say, oops. Maybe I shouldn't have said that.
22:58
Yep. Or One you're gonna get a and if they're listening, you'll get a reaction,
23:01
and you'll know that they're they're engaged. But, anyway, Leslie, we we
23:05
are having too much fun. I know we are having fun. I wanna make sure
23:08
that you tell people what the you know, what we're putting in the notes, the
23:12
gift, and how they can connect with you. Sure. So they can,
23:16
visit me on my website, and I have a free download. It's a
23:19
ebook that's 5 tips to better public
23:23
speaking. That is not the exact name of it, but, we'll put that in
23:27
the show notes because I can't remember it off the top of
23:31
my head. And I have a book coming out soon. It'll
23:34
probably be another 6 weeks, but it's find your voice,
23:39
conquer your fears, and share your story with confidence. Because I believe
23:43
that every especially if you are an entrepreneur, you have
23:47
a story about why you started your business and why you're
23:50
an entrepreneur. That's an important story to share. You
23:54
shared a little bit about yours, the the idea that it was,
23:59
always to be better and to be the best, and you had to
24:02
overcome the but don't show off. Right? Don't don't don't put
24:06
yourself too much out there because so that
24:10
how do you work that? Right? Anyway, I think it's important
24:13
that people are able to share their story.
24:18
And that will definitely give them some steps of what they
24:22
Yeah. You know, some easy steps that they could take and get better almost
24:25
immediately. That's fantastic. That is so generous. Thank you so much.
24:29
Oh, my pleasure. And the question I always like to ask my
24:33
guests is, when was the last time you did something
24:36
for the first time? But the
24:40
the last time was very recently because my husband and I just completed
24:44
a 6, 000 900 mile road trip to the
24:48
Western United States to celebrate our 40th wedding anniversary. So
24:51
Congratulations. Thank you. I'm not sure we've spent that
24:55
much time alone together in a car
25:00
since maybe since our honeymoon. Anyway, it was a
25:04
we saw so many wonderful things. I know I know the world
25:07
has beautiful, beautiful places all over the world, but the
25:11
western US is particularly amazing.
25:15
I have not done a tour of the west. I something that my husband definitely
25:19
wants to do, and we will do it. So to
25:22
bring this to a close, I just wanna say, make sure that you
25:26
subscribe and share this on
25:30
social media with your friends. And for me, this is a way to
25:33
give back and to help the community, and I wanna make
25:37
sure that, you know, I bring exciting
25:42
and, impactful guests that are gonna fuel your quest for growth and
25:45
impact. So, Leslie,
25:50
give me your last words before we end.
25:53
If there's 1 thing, you know, a quote that can help people.
25:57
Well, 1 thing I always advise people to do
26:01
no matter where they're speaking, whether it's on a podcast or
26:05
in person, seated or standing, keep your
26:09
feet flat on the floor.
26:13
Anchor yourself. Now move move with purpose. You can
26:17
move the upper half of your body. You can step in. You can step
26:20
forward, but avoid pacing. And when you're seated,
26:23
avoid twisting in your seat or crossing your legs.
26:27
I just think you're much more powerful when you stand with your
26:31
feet flat on the floor. That makes your shoulders go back,
26:35
makes you look you know, that whole idea of posture.
26:39
And Mhmm.
26:46
Oh, you you stopped. It was like Yep. Oh, yep. That sorry. That was that's
26:50
it. I didn't I didn't Yep.
26:53
Just be powerful in your in your presentation One And
26:57
in your body. In your body. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
27:02
So you can you know that this was done live. Exactly.
27:07
The only thing that's missing, and I got my fingers crossed. The only thing that's
27:11
missing is the barking dog. So, Oh, well, I had that
27:14
earlier. Okay. So I want make sure you join us for next time
27:18
and listen to, the earlier episodes so that
27:22
you can dive into a world of, you know, bold visions and and
27:25
and innovative possibilities. But I I wanna remind you like I always do.
27:29
The change is simple, but it's not always easy. It requires
27:33
courage, resilience, and a willingness a willingness to step out of your
27:37
comfort zone. I can't say it. I'm so excited.
27:41
So I want you to join me for One small change.
27:44
And until I see you next time with our next guest, which you're gonna be
27:48
very excited about, thank you for joining us, Leslie. Thank
27:52
you for being generous with your time and sharing with my audience, and
27:56
I think that all of us know that we do
27:59
better when we are ourselves, when we're our better selves. So thank
28:03
you. My pleasure. Thank you.