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4 Sand Tray Activities for Family Play Therapy Sessions · Next Level Play Therapy: A Podcast for Play Therapy Excellence

• 0:02
  Cathi Spooner: Welcome to Next Level Play Therapy.
• 0:04
  Cathi Spooner: A weekly podcast dedicated to supporting the next generation of child and adolescent therapists to provide exceptional play therapy services.
• 0:14
  Cathi Spooner: We'll explore all things play therapy.
• 0:17
  Cathi Spooner: To elevate your work with children and adolescents using the therapeutic powers of play.
• 0:23
  Cathi Spooner: I'll discuss practical tips and ideas so you can provide a transformative experience for your young clients and make a real difference in their lives.
• 0:33
  Cathi Spooner: So get ready to take your play therapy skills to the next level and make a lasting impact in the lives of children, adolescents, and families.
• 0:46
  Cathi Spooner: There.
• 0:47
  Cathi Spooner: Hello, play therapist.
• 0:49
  Cathi Spooner: Welcome to this week's episode of Next Level Play Therapy, where we talk about all things play therapy.
• 0:58
  Cathi Spooner: And today we are gonna talk about one of my favorite, favorite, favorite, favorite things to do in family play therapy sessions.
• 1:12
  Cathi Spooner: And that is using the sand tray.
• 1:16
  Cathi Spooner: In your family play therapy sessions?
• 1:19
  Cathi Spooner: Usually when I'm doing San Tray trainings or I am, um, doing my attachment focused family play therapy trainings, this usually comes up about using the San Tray.
• 1:32
  Cathi Spooner: So I thought, and it also comes up in Play Therapy Academy all the time.
• 1:38
  Cathi Spooner: Over the years we've talked about this.
• 1:41
  Cathi Spooner: So I thought this would be a perfect episode for my weekly live stream, which then gets repurposed into my weekly podcast.
• 1:53
  Cathi Spooner: So those of you watching live, you're probably watching on LinkedIn or my YouTube channel.
• 2:02
  Cathi Spooner: Which is Kathy Spooner renewing hearts or maybe you're watching on Instagram.
• 2:08
  Cathi Spooner: 'cause I, I use my streaming platform to stream live on LinkedIn and YouTube.
• 2:14
  Cathi Spooner: And then I also will simultaneously stream on Instagram, which is why you'll see me go back and forth between cameras.
• 2:24
  Cathi Spooner: 'cause I, I like to stream on Instagram as well.
• 2:29
  Cathi Spooner: And I would love to know who is here watching live today, or also those of you who are watching the replays, a lot of people like to watch the replays.
• 2:43
  Cathi Spooner: I would love to know who's here, who's listening, who's watching, so please post your name in the comments.
• 2:53
  Cathi Spooner: Where are you from?
• 2:54
  Cathi Spooner: What population do you work with?
• 2:56
  Cathi Spooner: Are you using santra in play therapy sessions?
• 3:01
  Cathi Spooner: Are you using family play therapy sessions?
• 3:05
  Cathi Spooner: Go ahead and post that in the comments.
• 3:09
  Cathi Spooner: For those of you listening on the podcast.
• 3:13
  Cathi Spooner: Please feel free to pop over to my Instagram channel at Renewing Hearts Training and leave me a comment, send me a private message.
• 3:22
  Cathi Spooner: I would love to hear from you guys.
• 3:24
  Cathi Spooner: Also, feel free to let me know if there are topics.
• 3:27
  Cathi Spooner: Sometimes I, I kind of run outta topics over the last several years.
• 3:33
  Cathi Spooner: Um, normally I can figure something out.
• 3:35
  Cathi Spooner: I'll usually go back to my vault, so to speak, in YouTube.
• 3:41
  Cathi Spooner: All the livestream replay episodes are on my YouTube channel on the live tab, and so I can usually go back there.
• 3:49
  Cathi Spooner: But I would love to, to know your thoughts.
• 3:52
  Cathi Spooner: Um, so feel free to post those in the comments.
• 3:57
  Cathi Spooner: Send me a private message.
• 3:59
  Cathi Spooner: And today we are going to talk about using santra in play therapy with your clients.
• 4:08
  Cathi Spooner: So let's get started for today.
• 4:12
  Cathi Spooner: Uh, before I do that though, I forgot.
• 4:14
  Cathi Spooner: If you find this information helpful, please feel free to share it with a colleague who might be interested.
• 4:22
  Cathi Spooner: So let's get started for today.
• 4:25
  Cathi Spooner: Alrighty.
• 4:26
  Cathi Spooner: So one of the things that I think is beneficial about using family play therapy with my clients is that I get to see in real time what are the interaction patterns and s. I don't know how many of you raise your, kind of, raise your virtual hand or post in the comments.
• 4:51
  Cathi Spooner: How many of you have had experiences where you're working with your client using the traditional approach of individual play therapy sessions, and you meet here and there with parents maybe after the session or maybe you meet with them separately or both?
• 5:12
  Cathi Spooner: And you've had experiences where you've, you've shared parenting tips and strategies, made suggestions explained, done some psychoeducation around some parenting strategies, recommended books, recommended workbooks, and yet you continue to get those phone calls or texts or emails in between play therapy sessions.
• 5:40
  Cathi Spooner: From kind of, um, worried parents that nothing's working and you're baffled like what is going on?
• 5:50
  Cathi Spooner: They seem to be doing fine in play therapy sessions.
• 5:53
  Cathi Spooner: What's going on outside of play therapy sessions?
• 5:57
  Cathi Spooner: Where's the breakdown?
• 5:58
  Cathi Spooner: Well, here's how I look at.
• 6:04
  Cathi Spooner: Using family play therapy when you are just relying on traditional play therapy models of individual play therapy sessions.
• 6:15
  Cathi Spooner: And you're getting feedback from parents, which can be very insightful.
• 6:19
  Cathi Spooner: Like, I like partnering with parents.
• 6:22
  Cathi Spooner: I like, um, having collaboration where they gimme their insights and I share my insights.
• 6:29
  Cathi Spooner: Here's the reality though, it's kind of like those, um, what do we call those questionnaires?
• 6:35
  Cathi Spooner: Like the self-report questionnaires, right?
• 6:39
  Cathi Spooner: You're just getting their perspective.
• 6:44
  Cathi Spooner: Um.
• 6:44
  Cathi Spooner: You're not really seeing it for yourself.
• 6:47
  Cathi Spooner: And self-report measures, questionnaires are helpful and they are important.
• 6:54
  Cathi Spooner: That being said, if you really wanna know what's going on, then you gotta get under the hood, so to speak, and see for yourself what's going on.
• 7:05
  Cathi Spooner: So my car metaphor there, if you're, it's kind of like.
• 7:10
  Cathi Spooner: Um, this is, this would be, every time I think about this metaphor, I start laughing in my head.
• 7:16
  Cathi Spooner: 'cause I think to myself, this would be me.
• 7:20
  Cathi Spooner: So it's kind of like me or maybe you having a problem with your car.
• 7:25
  Cathi Spooner: It's making weird noises.
• 7:27
  Cathi Spooner: It's doing weird things.
• 7:28
  Cathi Spooner: It's so, you take it to the car repair place and you explain it to the car repair person behind the, behind the register, behind the counter.
• 7:39
  Cathi Spooner: Who's aware of car things, who's experienced with car things, and for me, I would not be experienced with car things.
• 7:48
  Cathi Spooner: I don't understand car things.
• 7:51
  Cathi Spooner: I know I turn the key on, I push the gas pedal and it's supposed to go and it's supposed to shift.
• 7:56
  Cathi Spooner: I put it in different gears.
• 7:58
  Cathi Spooner: These are the things I know, right?
• 8:00
  Cathi Spooner: These are my perspective of what's happening.
• 8:04
  Cathi Spooner: And so there's a problem.
• 8:06
  Cathi Spooner: I go to the car repair place, I talk to the car repair person behind the counter, and I use my limited knowledge and understanding to describe the weird noises and the weird sounds and the weird things.
• 8:23
  Cathi Spooner: Going on with my car.
• 8:24
  Cathi Spooner: Some of you here in the US might've seen those commercials where, where you, they kind of show a commercial with the customer doing that, and the person behind the counter is looking at, I'm like, huh, I have no idea.
• 8:40
  Cathi Spooner: Well, that's kind of like relying on secondhand information from parents.
• 8:46
  Cathi Spooner: They valid points, good information.
• 8:50
  Cathi Spooner: Just like me going to the car repair place, I'm providing valid information.
• 8:55
  Cathi Spooner: I'm just hoping the person behind the counter can translate what I'm saying to make sense of it so they know what to do because I don't know what to do.
• 9:05
  Cathi Spooner: That's why I'm going to the car repair place because the person there is supposed to know what to do, or they have people who are trained and knowledgeable to know how to fix my car.
• 9:17
  Cathi Spooner: I'm giving my secondhand informa.
• 9:21
  Cathi Spooner: Well, the person behind the counter is taking my secondhand information.
• 9:25
  Cathi Spooner: If they really wanna know what's going on, then that might give them some ideas.
• 9:31
  Cathi Spooner: Me explaining in my.
• 9:33
  Cathi Spooner: Non-technical terms that might give them an idea, but they're not really gonna know until they run their own diagnostics and probably take it out for a test drive even to see if they can figure out what's happening so they can get firsthand knowledge.
• 9:54
  Cathi Spooner: So in my mind, when we're working with children and we're working on helping them to heal.
• 10:02
  Cathi Spooner: Getting firsthand knowledge is really important to help children heal and not only help them heal, also, um, support parents to learn new skills and use them in the play therapy process to long-term help their children heal.
• 10:25
  Cathi Spooner: And in my mind, that's the benefit of family play therapy sessions.
• 10:32
  Cathi Spooner: And so if I want firsthand information, if I wanna see for myself what are those interactions going on, then I'm usually at some point I'll, I usually start out with individual play therapy sessions while I'm simultaneously beginning to use my play therapy attachment focused family play therapy model to do some of my psychoeducation with parents.
• 10:59
  Cathi Spooner: Help them understand their role, uh, understand what co-regulation is, help to un understand the, uh, behavior and what's going on, and begin to move them in the direction of, at some point, we're probably going to be doing some family play therapy sessions.
• 11:19
  Cathi Spooner: That is typically the case to do that, though I want to, and so.
• 11:26
  Cathi Spooner: To do that.
• 11:27
  Cathi Spooner: Let me finish my sentence then.
• 11:29
  Cathi Spooner: I, I want, I wanna use a model for those family play therapy sessions.
• 11:35
  Cathi Spooner: So they have strategic outcomes, they have a higher rate of success because I'm using a play therapy model.
• 11:45
  Cathi Spooner: And one of the things that I love doing to get that firsthand knowledge and see those interaction patterns myself, especially in the beginning of the play therapy process when I'm using my attachment focused family play therapy model.
• 12:05
  Cathi Spooner: I love using sand tray activities 'cause I think it's a great way to lift up the hood and see for myself what is going on with my client and their parents or maybe parents and siblings and then that way I have a better idea.
• 12:28
  Cathi Spooner: Of how to help them because in order to, this is your case conceptualization, which is a fancy term for what's actually going on underneath the behavior and what are the patterns sustaining it that are going on.
• 12:42
  Cathi Spooner: So if I want to get, I have my case conceptualization, but then I wanna kind of lift the hood up, so to speak.
• 12:53
  Cathi Spooner: Have these family play therapy sessions, see for myself.
• 12:58
  Cathi Spooner: What's going on?
• 12:59
  Cathi Spooner: Because that's then, and only then am I gonna know how to help my clients.
• 13:06
  Cathi Spooner: That's how I'm gonna figure out what we need to do in the play therapy sessions.
• 13:11
  Cathi Spooner: So one of the things that comes up all the time, play Therapy Academy, which is my online consultation program.
• 13:21
  Cathi Spooner: And we, we, um, have meet twice a month and staff cases.
• 13:26
  Cathi Spooner: One of the things that comes up all the time is, how do I help my client?
• 13:30
  Cathi Spooner: Well, in order to do that, we first have to figure out what's going on, right?
• 13:36
  Cathi Spooner: So family play therapy sessions, when you're using a family play therapy model can help you figure that out.
• 13:44
  Cathi Spooner: And then you can use, excuse me, you can use.
• 13:49
  Cathi Spooner: That family plea therapy model to help facilitate the change how, and long term, long after you're gone because you have created shifts within that child's family system.
• 14:05
  Cathi Spooner: And one of the things I am a firm believer, uh, about, and I have believed this for decades because my, my, I would say my foundation.
• 14:17
  Cathi Spooner: Foundational theoretical model that I was trained in back in 1990 when I got started in grad school was a family systems, family therapy, family systems approach.
• 14:30
  Cathi Spooner: And when you're working with children, we need to see them within context.
• 14:35
  Cathi Spooner: Within context of their most important relationships.
• 14:39
  Cathi Spooner: So even if you know along the way I learned about this interpersonal neurobiology thing and attachment theory and different attachment therapy models, and I was even more convinced about the importance of those attachment relationships.
• 14:56
  Cathi Spooner: And so as play therapist, I'm a firm believer.
• 15:02
  Cathi Spooner: That if we really wanna facilitate long-term shifts for healing for our clients, then we are really going to use a family play therapy or an attachment model to create those shifts within those attachment relationships within those family relationships.
• 15:28
  Cathi Spooner: So with that being said, um, I wanna share three, four, I got four.
• 15:38
  Cathi Spooner: 1, 2, 3, 4. I'm looking at my notes.
• 15:40
  Cathi Spooner: I got four sand tray activities that you can use in family play therapy sessions and that's gonna really help you get a sense of what.
• 15:52
  Cathi Spooner: Is going on with your clients as well as help to facilitate the change process and the healing process.
• 16:02
  Cathi Spooner: So first I want to say hello, heart leave Center.
• 16:07
  Cathi Spooner: I see that you joined the Instagram live stream, so.
• 16:12
  Cathi Spooner: I've, I've, uh, a fond affection for the Harle Center in Fairfax, Virginia.
• 16:19
  Cathi Spooner: 'cause that's, that's my old stompy grounds.
• 16:22
  Cathi Spooner: And Sherry Michelin and I go way back, um, way, way back.
• 16:28
  Cathi Spooner: So Hello Harle Harle Center.
• 16:31
  Cathi Spooner: Um, all right, that's enough for my distractions.
• 16:35
  Cathi Spooner: Let me get going.
• 16:37
  Cathi Spooner: My first Heartley center says hello.
• 16:41
  Cathi Spooner: Um, so my first activity that I wanna share, the first two actually, to take me back 20 years ago.
• 16:51
  Cathi Spooner: So if any of you have ever taken any play therapy trainings from Eliana Gill, you know, these are phenomenally awesome.
• 17:00
  Cathi Spooner: I, uh, I first got introduced to Eliana Gale back in my Virginia days 'cause that's where she was.
• 17:10
  Cathi Spooner: And she was doing a lot of trainings back there, especially on the east coast.
• 17:15
  Cathi Spooner: I'm on the west coast now, but I still, these are two, two San Tray activities that I still use.
• 17:23
  Cathi Spooner: Even more than 20 years later.
• 17:26
  Cathi Spooner: I love these activities.
• 17:29
  Cathi Spooner: I use them all the time.
• 17:32
  Cathi Spooner: Typically in the first two to three se, even the first maybe family play therapy session, I'm using these two activities in the first couple of family play therapy sessions because they, to me, they help me.
• 17:50
  Cathi Spooner: Really get a sense of those family interaction patterns.
• 17:55
  Cathi Spooner: So the first, the first prompt that I, or first activity that I learned, um, was from Eliana Gill, and it's called Make A World.
• 18:08
  Cathi Spooner: I took her San Tray training.
• 18:10
  Cathi Spooner: Poof.
• 18:11
  Cathi Spooner: Back in 2003, I think such a game changer set me on a different direct, uh, trajectory.
• 18:21
  Cathi Spooner: And I use it, it's one of my, one of my tools, a staple, so to speak, in my toolbox when I'm using play therapy and when I'm using family play therapy sessions.
• 18:33
  Cathi Spooner: So it's make a world.
• 18:35
  Cathi Spooner: So the, the purpose of this.
• 18:39
  Cathi Spooner: San tray activity Make a world.
• 18:41
  Cathi Spooner: And when I have all the family members in there, or just the parent and the child, the purpose is really to see how family members are gonna make decisions.
• 18:51
  Cathi Spooner: How are they problem solving?
• 18:53
  Cathi Spooner: Are parents able to lead and follow?
• 18:57
  Cathi Spooner: And how do they, how do they work through those decision making?
• 19:03
  Cathi Spooner: Processes and how do they manage some, maybe some differences, opinion.
• 19:08
  Cathi Spooner: How do they manage that, that space in the sand tray?
• 19:14
  Cathi Spooner: And so I get to see in real time what are those interaction patterns when I use this activity.
• 19:22
  Cathi Spooner: So here's the prompt that I use and, and I say this to, I have family members in there, so I have either.
• 19:31
  Cathi Spooner: Both parents and all, all the siblings plus the client, or maybe it's a single parent household.
• 19:38
  Cathi Spooner: I have parent, child and siblings.
• 19:40
  Cathi Spooner: Or maybe I just have one parent and one child, uh, and the client.
• 19:45
  Cathi Spooner: But so the prompt is.
• 19:48
  Cathi Spooner: Use as many or as, uh, sorry, lemme rephrase that.
• 19:52
  Cathi Spooner: Use the San Tray miniatures to create a world in the sand.
• 19:56
  Cathi Spooner: It can be any kind of world you want.
• 19:58
  Cathi Spooner: You guys get to decide, so you're going to, and I introduce them.
• 20:02
  Cathi Spooner: Here are the San Tray miniatures.
• 20:05
  Cathi Spooner: I introduce them to the San Tray.
• 20:08
  Cathi Spooner: My client probably has already spent time in the sand tray, so they are an expert already in the sand tray, and then I stand back and I allow them to make the sand tray.
• 20:23
  Cathi Spooner: I typically use this in the observational assessment stage of my attachment focus, family play therapy model, because I really wanna see.
• 20:34
  Cathi Spooner: I really wanna see their interaction patterns.
• 20:39
  Cathi Spooner: I do have a little bit of structure, so I, I'll share my kind of structure, AKA rules that I share.
• 20:48
  Cathi Spooner: But if you don't like these rules, you, you feel free to create rules that align with you, um, and the model that you're using because maybe, maybe you are already using a play therapy model that.
• 21:04
  Cathi Spooner: Um, uses family play therapy like Alerian Family Play therapy or maybe, um, gestalt Family Play therapy or maybe you use a different fam play, family play therapy model.
• 21:19
  Cathi Spooner: I use my attachment focused family play therapy model.
• 21:23
  Cathi Spooner: Also, if you're interested, I do have a training coming up on Saturday.
• 21:28
  Cathi Spooner: Called attachment focused family play therapy.
• 21:31
  Cathi Spooner: You can attend in person or virtually.
• 21:34
  Cathi Spooner: Registration closes tomorrow though, so I'll share some information about that at the end.
• 21:39
  Cathi Spooner: I also have a TRE training coming up in December.
• 21:43
  Cathi Spooner: I'll share some information about that as well, and I'll share some information about Play Therapy Academy.
• 21:49
  Cathi Spooner: So stay tuned till the end.
• 21:52
  Cathi Spooner: So here, here are the rules that I give when I'm using.
• 21:57
  Cathi Spooner: The, um, make a world activity in a family play therapy session.
• 22:05
  Cathi Spooner: So I try to structure it a little bit and the rules I give are, um, the sand stays in the sandbox.
• 22:13
  Cathi Spooner: That's one of the rules.
• 22:15
  Cathi Spooner: Also, if you didn't choose the miniature to put in the sand tray, you can't take it out.
• 22:22
  Cathi Spooner: Everybody gets to have, uh, a say.
• 22:27
  Cathi Spooner: What goes into the sand tray, and so we wanna make sure that we're respecting everybody's wants and needs in here.
• 22:36
  Cathi Spooner: And if you don't like what somebody else put in there, then that's fine.
• 22:43
  Cathi Spooner: They still get to put it in there because we need to be respectful that everybody has a say.
• 22:50
  Cathi Spooner: Making this world as a family.
• 22:53
  Cathi Spooner: And then the other, the other rule that I have just because I've learned, um, if I don't set the limit, this is my personal, you don't have to use this one.
• 23:06
  Cathi Spooner: Uh, I've learned if I don't set a limit on how many.
• 23:10
  Cathi Spooner: San Tray miniatures they're putting in there, they're, it's a good possibility that they're gonna use all my San Tray miniatures and it's, it's going to be like gigantically full.
• 23:22
  Cathi Spooner: But honestly, the main thing is I have to put them all away way.
• 23:30
  Cathi Spooner: So I'm trying to manage what I can accommodate.
• 23:37
  Cathi Spooner: Because I gotta put these all away before the next session.
• 23:40
  Cathi Spooner: So this is just a practical one.
• 23:42
  Cathi Spooner: If you don't like this one, there's pros and cons for using that one, and I, I think they're all valid.
• 23:48
  Cathi Spooner: I just decided for me, the pros outweigh the cons of this.
• 23:53
  Cathi Spooner: So I set a limit.
• 23:55
  Cathi Spooner: Each person can use a maximum of 10 miniatures in the sand tray.
• 24:02
  Cathi Spooner: If you find that you are going over your 10, then you just have to figure out which one that you put in you wanna take out.
• 24:11
  Cathi Spooner: And then I have like a little tray where I have people, any of the miniatures that they decide and change your mind about, they can put 'em in the kind of the little tray.
• 24:21
  Cathi Spooner: And then I use that to put things away later.
• 24:25
  Cathi Spooner: So, um, so that's one of 'em, that's one of my favorites.
• 24:28
  Cathi Spooner: Make a World.
• 24:30
  Cathi Spooner: The second activity that I love using in the San W with San Tray miniatures is another activity that I learned from Eliana Gill, and it is called Family Play Genogram.
• 24:45
  Cathi Spooner: So I've shared this one in a gazillion, um, consultation meetings that I've had over the last.
• 24:54
  Cathi Spooner: Oh, I think it's probably more than 15 years now doing consultation with different people.
• 24:59
  Cathi Spooner: And it's always interesting to me the way different people add their own spin to it, all of which are, I find interesting.
• 25:07
  Cathi Spooner: And, um, so I say that to say, I'm gonna share, this is what I learned from Eliana Gale about the family played therapy.
• 25:15
  Cathi Spooner: Uh, the family played genogram.
• 25:18
  Cathi Spooner: And then, you know, add your twist to it.
• 25:22
  Cathi Spooner: So this one, the purpose of this one is really to get a sense of family members experiences of each other and how family members view their relationships.
• 25:37
  Cathi Spooner: So the prompt is, there's two, there's two prompts, and I give one prompt at a time.
• 25:44
  Cathi Spooner: Otherwise they get really confused.
• 25:47
  Cathi Spooner: Honestly, when I have a whiteboard.
• 25:50
  Cathi Spooner: In the, in the play therapy room where I have the San Tray miniatures, then I'll write these on the whiteboard just because otherwise it just helps family members not be confused.
• 26:04
  Cathi Spooner: And I only give them one at a time, one step at a time.
• 26:07
  Cathi Spooner: Otherwise, if I give them both steps, they get confused and overwhelmed.
• 26:11
  Cathi Spooner: So just to structure it a little bit, I give one prompt at a time.
• 26:16
  Cathi Spooner: So the first prompt is.
• 26:19
  Cathi Spooner: Choose a miniature or miniature, plural that best represent each one of your family members, including yourself.
• 26:30
  Cathi Spooner: So, um, the, the way that I learned it was I take like a big 11 by 17 piece of paper, have one for each family member.
• 26:40
  Cathi Spooner: Prior to the session, I would've drawn out big circles and squares.
• 26:46
  Cathi Spooner: On the paper for the genogram.
• 26:48
  Cathi Spooner: So the two, two parent family, it would be the mom and the dad.
• 26:52
  Cathi Spooner: And let's say there's three siblings, two boys and a girl.
• 26:57
  Cathi Spooner: Then I would've drawn out the genogram representing that family system.
• 27:02
  Cathi Spooner: If it's a single mom and parents are divorced.
• 27:08
  Cathi Spooner: Um, and kids are going back and forth.
• 27:11
  Cathi Spooner: I'll still put both parents on there 'cause I wanna see what family members pick and I wanna see what happens.
• 27:19
  Cathi Spooner: I don't have both divorced parents In the session, I'll just have the, the one one parent.
• 27:30
  Cathi Spooner: Um, and so I give that prompt and then I have them place the miniatures that represents each family member, including themselves on the corresponding circle or square on their genogram.
• 27:46
  Cathi Spooner: Other versions of that that people have used is they just have them place those directly into the sand tray.
• 27:53
  Cathi Spooner: They don't draw out the genogram, and there's.
• 27:57
  Cathi Spooner: Lots of information to gain from that as well.
• 28:00
  Cathi Spooner: So just a couple different options there.
• 28:03
  Cathi Spooner: And then once they've done that, then we go through and each person shares the reason that they picked the um, each miniature, and then I give them the second prompt, which is pick the miniature or miniatures that best represents.
• 28:21
  Cathi Spooner: Your relationship with each of these people.
• 28:25
  Cathi Spooner: So your relationship with parent, your relationship with other parent, your relationship with sibling, I would've, you know, said mom or dad or brother or sister.
• 28:38
  Cathi Spooner: I would've said those things.
• 28:40
  Cathi Spooner: Uh, so then, then they go and they pick the miniatures and they put them in the spot where they go.
• 28:46
  Cathi Spooner: And then when they're done, then we.
• 28:48
  Cathi Spooner: We, we go one by one and each person gets to share the reason they picked what they picked for a little bit of structure.
• 28:57
  Cathi Spooner: For that, I, I'll go ahead and if I'm using the genogram paper, I'll do that ahead of time.
• 29:04
  Cathi Spooner: I'll draw out the genogram on the paper.
• 29:07
  Cathi Spooner: Um, then I'll also give a couple of rules, which is.
• 29:12
  Cathi Spooner: If you didn't put this sand tray miniature on there, you don't get to change what other people picked.
• 29:20
  Cathi Spooner: So you can choose what goes on your, um, genogram, but you don't get to choose what goes on other family members genogram, and you may not like what the other person picked for you.
• 29:34
  Cathi Spooner: Um, and they still, that other person gets to have their opinion.
• 29:40
  Cathi Spooner: Just like you get to have your opinion, each person gets to have their opinion.
• 29:45
  Cathi Spooner: So I, I wanna make sure to set the expectation for these first two activities.
• 29:53
  Cathi Spooner: I wanna make sure to set the expectation that people are allowed to have differing opinions, and we want to allow each person in the.
• 30:02
  Cathi Spooner: Family play therapy session to have that voice.
• 30:06
  Cathi Spooner: Now I'm gonna observe how that gets handled and kind of make note of that.
• 30:13
  Cathi Spooner: It'll give me a good sense of those interaction patterns and also a sense of parents' ability to lead and follow and how they manage those things.
• 30:25
  Cathi Spooner: So those are the first two.
• 30:26
  Cathi Spooner: Those are the two that I learned from Ellie and I, Gail.
• 30:29
  Cathi Spooner: The next one is, uh, an activity I actually learned from my other very favorite sand play trainer, which is Dr. D Preston.
• 30:42
  Cathi Spooner: Dylan, I used to go to her San Tray training.
• 30:45
  Cathi Spooner: Well, San Play.
• 30:46
  Cathi Spooner: Trainings all the time.
• 30:48
  Cathi Spooner: She's amazingly awesome.
• 30:49
  Cathi Spooner: Again, on the East coast.
• 30:51
  Cathi Spooner: She has, um, the Center for Sand and what is it?
• 30:56
  Cathi Spooner: The, the Center for Sand Play and Culture.
• 30:59
  Cathi Spooner: I think that's what it is.
• 31:00
  Cathi Spooner: Dr. D Preston.
• 31:01
  Cathi Spooner: Dylan.
• 31:02
  Cathi Spooner: Um, anyway, she, she gave us this prompt and then I've just integrated into, I integrated into individual.
• 31:10
  Cathi Spooner: Sessions.
• 31:11
  Cathi Spooner: I do this one a lot with grownups too.
• 31:13
  Cathi Spooner: For the record, I also like to use it in family play therapy sessions.
• 31:18
  Cathi Spooner: So there's four prompts to this one.
• 31:23
  Cathi Spooner: Again, I only give one prompt at a time, and if I have a whiteboard in the, in the playroom where I am, then I'll write one.
• 31:33
  Cathi Spooner: I'll write each prompt out one at a time just to add a little structure 'cause.
• 31:39
  Cathi Spooner: Family members get a little confused sometimes.
• 31:42
  Cathi Spooner: It just kind of helps them settle in a little bit more by providing some structure.
• 31:47
  Cathi Spooner: The purpose of this activity, which I call my family and me, I gave it a title.
• 31:54
  Cathi Spooner: Um, so this My Family and Me Activity in the San Tray.
• 32:01
  Cathi Spooner: Helps give me a sense of how family members experience one another and how they view themselves in their family members, and how do they communicate that and what would they like family members to know, and then how do family members respond to that?
• 32:18
  Cathi Spooner: Right?
• 32:19
  Cathi Spooner: So here are the four prompts.
• 32:23
  Cathi Spooner: Prompt number.
• 32:24
  Cathi Spooner: And then so I give a prompt and then I invite them to go choose the miniature and miniatures that best represents the prompt I'm giving, and to place them into the sand tray.
• 32:36
  Cathi Spooner: They can place them wherever they want.
• 32:39
  Cathi Spooner: 'cause I like to see where they place them as well.
• 32:43
  Cathi Spooner: So the first prompt I give them is, how do I see myself in my family?
• 32:50
  Cathi Spooner: So each person chooses a miniature, a miniature that best represents how do I see myself in my family?
• 32:59
  Cathi Spooner: Then I let everybody choose that, and then we go through and see what everybody, everybody gets to say, you know, the reason they picked that one.
• 33:08
  Cathi Spooner: And then I give them the second prompt, which is, how does my family see me?
• 33:17
  Cathi Spooner: So the second prompt is how does my family see me?
• 33:21
  Cathi Spooner: And then I'm gonna pick the miniature and miniatures that best represents how I think my family views me in my in the family.
• 33:32
  Cathi Spooner: And then they go choose them.
• 33:34
  Cathi Spooner: Then one by one we go through, everybody gets to share the reason they picked the one that they picked.
• 33:41
  Cathi Spooner: The third prompt is.
• 33:45
  Cathi Spooner: How would I like my family?
• 33:48
  Cathi Spooner: Oh, how would I like to see myself in my family?
• 33:54
  Cathi Spooner: So this is we, how do I see myself in my family?
• 33:58
  Cathi Spooner: How do, how would I like to see myself in the family?
• 34:01
  Cathi Spooner: So, very subtle differences there.
• 34:04
  Cathi Spooner: So the third prompt I give is how would I, like, how would I like to see myself?
• 34:12
  Cathi Spooner: In my family.
• 34:13
  Cathi Spooner: And then I invite everybody to choose the miniature or miniatures that best represents that.
• 34:19
  Cathi Spooner: Everybody puts them in there.
• 34:21
  Cathi Spooner: We go through, everybody gets to share the reason they picked what they picked, and then I give them the fourth and final prompt, which is how would I like my family to see me?
• 34:35
  Cathi Spooner: So the first one was how would I like, uh, sorry, the third one was.
• 34:40
  Cathi Spooner: How would I like to see myself in my family?
• 34:43
  Cathi Spooner: The fourth prompt is how would I like my family to see me?
• 34:49
  Cathi Spooner: So then they each go pick the miniature or miniatures that best represents how I would like my family to see me.
• 34:57
  Cathi Spooner: And they put them in the sandre, and then one by one we go through and share.
• 35:02
  Cathi Spooner: Everybody shares the reason that they picked what they picked.
• 35:07
  Cathi Spooner: So the structure that I have for that is I give one at a time.
• 35:10
  Cathi Spooner: We process one at a time, helps to cut down on the confusion.
• 35:15
  Cathi Spooner: And again, I have the same.
• 35:17
  Cathi Spooner: Rules that I have for the other ones, which is if you didn't put it in there, you didn't get to, you don't get to take it away.
• 35:23
  Cathi Spooner: Everybody gets to have their voice and everybody gets to have their opinion.
• 35:29
  Cathi Spooner: Uh, 'cause we want to make it a safe place for everybody.
• 35:32
  Cathi Spooner: And then I'm going to observe how all of that gets managed.
• 35:37
  Cathi Spooner: I'm gonna observe what pe, what each family member picks.
• 35:41
  Cathi Spooner: I'm gonna observe how parents.
• 35:44
  Cathi Spooner: Follow and lead, so to speak, to use an attachment term.
• 35:49
  Cathi Spooner: Um, and, and as I'm using my attachment focused family play therapy model, I'm also, um, seeing how parents are using these attachment based parenting skills that I'm teaching them.
• 36:07
  Cathi Spooner: They get to practice those in the family play therapy sessions.
• 36:13
  Cathi Spooner: With my support and we would've had conversations about how that works.
• 36:17
  Cathi Spooner: Um, but I'm also observing the, how parents are using attachment based parenting skills to facilitate this process.
• 36:30
  Cathi Spooner: So then the fourth.
• 36:32
  Cathi Spooner: Activity that I will use with the sand tray is what I, I call it like a deep dive.
• 36:38
  Cathi Spooner: So let's say, um, something comes up in the family play therapy sessions, and maybe you're noticing a trend and maybe in the, maybe you're doing an activity.
• 36:52
  Cathi Spooner: Um, and you're, you're gathering information and you're getting a good sense of what's going on, and maybe you're seeing a trend over and over and over when and, and one of your family play therapy sessions.
• 37:06
  Cathi Spooner: You, your prompt can be to raise this, Hey, I noticed this going on.
• 37:14
  Cathi Spooner: Or you don't even have to say that.
• 37:16
  Cathi Spooner: Sometimes I just give the prompt like, we're gonna do a, an activity in the sand tray today.
• 37:25
  Cathi Spooner: And let's say, um, let's say I noticed family members dealing with some grief and loss about the changes in the family system.
• 37:38
  Cathi Spooner: Maybe there was.
• 37:40
  Cathi Spooner: Maybe a, a family pet died and they a beloved, you know, our, our dogs, our cats, our furry animals, they are our furry children.
• 37:51
  Cathi Spooner: We love them.
• 37:52
  Cathi Spooner: Um, so maybe they're grieving with the loss.
• 37:55
  Cathi Spooner: So maybe the prompt would be choose the figure the gears that best represents how you're feeling about the, you know.
• 38:05
  Cathi Spooner: Losing family pet, or maybe I notice family members are struggling with, um, maybe there was a traumatic event and maybe there was some domestic violence.
• 38:23
  Cathi Spooner: This, this one would be further along in the change process.
• 38:28
  Cathi Spooner: So this, this one will be probably, if I'm using my family play therapy model, this one's gonna be.
• 38:35
  Cathi Spooner: Way into the family alignment stage.
• 38:38
  Cathi Spooner: This is where we're doing the bulk of the change and we've got safety established.
• 38:44
  Cathi Spooner: We've got, um, we, we've explored some things, so this one's further in where I may say, you know, pick.
• 38:53
  Cathi Spooner: The figure of figures that best represents by now, I would've explained trauma done like some psychoeducation around that.
• 39:02
  Cathi Spooner: Or maybe I give it a, the bad thing if I have really young kids in there and we're talking about the language we're using is the bad thing.
• 39:12
  Cathi Spooner: You know, if I'm using that, uh, brave Bart language or, um, a terrible thing happened.
• 39:18
  Cathi Spooner: Language, those are two really awesome books about trauma that you can use with kids.
• 39:24
  Cathi Spooner: So maybe I'm using that language.
• 39:26
  Cathi Spooner: So pick the, um, miniature or miniatures that best represent the bad thing or trauma, whatever language that we're using.
• 39:37
  Cathi Spooner: And use that as a way to get a sense of how family members are working through that, and give us an opportunity to talk about that a little bit.
• 39:50
  Cathi Spooner: And we use it in a non-confrontational way.
• 39:54
  Cathi Spooner: By now, family members would feel safe to talk about hard things, but also.
• 40:01
  Cathi Spooner: They don't have to use language to communicate.
• 40:06
  Cathi Spooner: You can see a picture is worth a thousand words, right?
• 40:10
  Cathi Spooner: That picture that you see in the San Tray based on the miniature that's chosen, that gives you tons of information, even if it's really concrete.
• 40:26
  Cathi Spooner: It still gives you lots of good information about how your client is experiencing it without actually having to figure out in their frontal lobes exactly in a precise way how to communicate to you.
• 40:44
  Cathi Spooner: They can use that symbol to show you.
• 40:50
  Cathi Spooner: Rather than have to explain it to you.
• 40:54
  Cathi Spooner: That's one of the things that I love about play therapy and in particular, sand tray activities because they can use the miniatures.
• 41:06
  Cathi Spooner: There are symbols that they can access to process what's been going on, and we can, we can take an issue that they're struggling with.
• 41:18
  Cathi Spooner: Give a prompt about if you choose a miniature or miniatures that best represents what that looks like, we can, we can have them use those symbols and then we can give it language, or now we don't even, we can, we can stay in the metaphor and give voice to what's going on so many different ways you can use that in individualize.
• 41:46
  Cathi Spooner: The issue that you're working on through the use of the symbols and the sand tray, to find a way to talk about that and maybe think about it differently or get support about the thing that happened or get validation or maybe have an opportunity to think about things a different way.
• 42:11
  Cathi Spooner: So.
• 42:12
  Cathi Spooner: The, the, um, the structure is here that I would say here is you really wanna think about what play therapy model that you're using because how you structure and facilitate that, the language even that you use right, is, is going to be.
• 42:31
  Cathi Spooner: Um, heavily influenced by your play therapy model.
• 42:35
  Cathi Spooner: So for, for example, an attachment focused family play therapy, I'm really looking at the interactions from a family systems and an attachment lens.
• 42:49
  Cathi Spooner: That interpersonal neurobiology lens from an attachment theory lens of how are they creating what.
• 42:57
  Cathi Spooner: Internal working models, are they, are they creating, or maybe I'm thinking about that concept of mentalization and how is that showing up in the sand tray?
• 43:09
  Cathi Spooner: So, or maybe I'm using an Adlerian play therapy, family play therapy model, and I'm looking at how each family member feels like they count or they're accessing courage.
• 43:25
  Cathi Spooner: So the language of my, my play therapy model and the way that I conceptualize what's going on is gonna be influenced by my my family play therapy model.
• 43:41
  Cathi Spooner: So that is it for today.
• 43:45
  Cathi Spooner: Let me just kind of do a quick recap and I just realized I'm running low on time, so I'm gonna speed through this last part.
• 43:52
  Cathi Spooner: So just to recap.
• 43:54
  Cathi Spooner: For today, so you can use the sand tray activities in family play therapy sessions to give you a really good idea of what's going on with those interaction patterns.
• 44:07
  Cathi Spooner: Also, to work with parents to help them use new attachment based parenting skills.
• 44:17
  Cathi Spooner: They're using those in the session with your support.
• 44:21
  Cathi Spooner: And then that.
• 44:22
  Cathi Spooner: And then that also gives them practice so that they can use them outside of the session.
• 44:29
  Cathi Spooner: And these play therapy activities will allow you, as the play therapist, get a good sense of what is going on in those interaction patterns and.
• 44:42
  Cathi Spooner: How parents are navigating that, or if I'm gonna use a circle of security term, I would say, how are parents being bigger, wiser, stronger, and kind?
• 44:54
  Cathi Spooner: Right?
• 44:54
  Cathi Spooner: And so you wanna make sure that you are using a family play therapy model.
• 45:01
  Cathi Spooner: Because you don't wanna just add parents in there as observers or not sure what their role is, and that makes things confusing for them and for you, you wanna make sure you have, um, you have a family play therapy model that you're using.
• 45:19
  Cathi Spooner: Because that's gonna increase the likelihood of success, but also help you navigate through maybe those challenging bits of the healing process.
• 45:32
  Cathi Spooner: So that's it for today.
• 45:33
  Cathi Spooner: I'll see you next week.
• 45:35
  Cathi Spooner: Bye for now.
• 45:40
  Cathi Spooner: Thank you for joining me on this episode of Next Level Play Therapy.
• 45:45
  Cathi Spooner: I hope you found the discussion valuable and gained new insights and ideas to support your work helping children, adolescents, and families heal.
• 45:54
  Cathi Spooner: If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to the podcast and leave a review.
• 45:59
  Cathi Spooner: Your feedback helps to improve and reach more people who can benefit from this information.
• 46:05
  Cathi Spooner: Remember.
• 46:06
  Cathi Spooner: Play therapy is a powerful tool for healing and growth.
• 46:10
  Cathi Spooner: Whether you're a new play therapist or experienced, I encourage you to continue your learning journey to unlock the potential of play in your own work in relationships.
• 46:21
  Cathi Spooner: If you have any questions or topics, suggestions for future.
• 46:26
  Cathi Spooner: I'd love to hear from you.
• 46:28
  Cathi Spooner: Connect with me on social media and visit my website at Renewing Hearts Play Therapy Training to stay updated on upcoming episodes, trainings, and resources.
• 46:41
  Cathi Spooner: Thank you once again for listening to Next Level Play Therapy.
• 46:44
  Cathi Spooner: Until next time, keep playing, learning and growing.