Latest / The Mental Healness Podcast / Why do narcissists have to be the center of attention?

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Why do narcissists have to be the center of attention? · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on, beautiful people?
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  Welcome to another episode of the Narcissist Code.
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  I'm your favorite selfaware narcissist, Mr. Lee Hammett
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  better known as mental illness across all social media
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  platforms. This is the first time seeing my
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  face or hearing my lovely voice. I'm a clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist and there's my platform on social media to
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  raise awareness for NPD. Get more people into the therapy
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  like myself and also validate the victims, survivors and
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  thrivers of said disorder. Said toxic people said toxic
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  traits. Today's episode is going to be
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  about why do narcissists always have to be the center of
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  attention. Before you hop into today's
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  episode y'all make sure y'all check out the new self Love
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  brand merch. This is the I love me.
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  This is the I'm vital shirt. I'm vital because I I am.
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  I'm vital to life. I'm vital for this earth.
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  I'm vital for my family. I'm vital for links in the
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  description of every single video and podcast that I do.
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  But yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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  The center of attention narcissistic people, y'all allow
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  a lot of the most nurses suffer from a deficit.
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  Let's just call it a deficit. They suffer from a deficit of
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  importance, an importance deficit.
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  Like they want to mean something.
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  You know, I don't want to be I I want to have some type of, I
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  need to have some type of value. I need to have some type of
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  meaning. I need to matter.
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  I need to matter. So in order for me to matter, I
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  have to be important. I have to have some level of
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  importance. Even though the lot of the stuff
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  I might do in my real life might not be important.
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  You know what I mean? They might not be important at
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  all. So a lot of times in people in
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  these situations tend to have to.
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  This is where the mind goes. They need to be the center.
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  They need to center themselves and damn near everything.
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  Everything. That's why I call.
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  When you're dealing with a narcissistic person and you have
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  a complaint, they have a big complaint.
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  It's the damn complaint. Olympics like you come home.
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  It's like work was so hard today.
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  Work was hard for you. What this is happening at my
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  job? They complain.
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  It's like a complaint competition.
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  Like they may have to win the gold medal.
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  They have to medal. They might not have to win gold,
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  but they have to medal. They have to.
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  They have to get them. They have to be on the podium.
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  You know what I'm saying? I have to be on the on the medal
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  podium to get a medal and just say I did that.
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  Yeah, you know what I'm saying? They have to be there in that
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  mindset with that type of dynamic, with that type of
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  space. That's where it goes.
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  So if I tell people, like I tell narcissistic people this all the
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  time, I mean not not narcissist people.
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  I tell these people who are dealing with narcissists all the
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  time that they have to send to themselves.
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  It's it's complaint competition. It's the struggle Olympics as
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  well. Like if you're struggling, they
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  struggle more or they have an equal or greater than struggle.
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  You know what I mean? Being narcissistic, people
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  literally should walk around with a see.
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  You see my shirt that says I'm vital.
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  They should have a greater than or equal to sign on their shirt
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  that points both ways just in case they're standing to the
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  left or right. Somebody I'm greater, greater
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  than or equal to you. Everything I do is greater than
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  or equal to yours. You know your struggles, your
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  success, your complaints, your pain, your hurt, your sickness,
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  your sorrow. You're a greater than or equal
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  to because they have to be the center, because they want to
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  matter at the core. At the core, a lot of Narciss
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  feel worthless. They feel like we feel like our
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  existences don't really matter in the grand scheme of things.
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  When I pass away in my little time that I have on the earth,
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  when I leave this earth, what will my legacy be?
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  Who am I going to matter to? Am I?
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  Have you ever seen the movie in Conto?
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  Not in Conto. Coco.
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  You seen Coco? Am I going to be on the
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  Offrenda? Like, am I going to be a friend
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  of like my Mama Coco and Mama Imelda?
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  Or am I going to be like Hector Hector Rivera and had my face
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  cut off on it, but people don't Remember Me.
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  You know what I mean? I want to be a friend.
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  You want to be Most narcissists want to be a friend of like
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  Ernesto de la Cruz. They want to be like him and
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  he's a sociopath that he was. But this is how it goes.
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  Y'all. That's what I tell people all
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  the time. Like if you don't think
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  narcissist or a toxic person, this is the life.
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  I'm not telling you. I'm not saying that you chose
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  this life. I'm just saying this is the life
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  that the dynamic and the space that you will be in.
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  You know that they have to be the center of attention.
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  They have to, they have to center themselves in drama.
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  They have to center themselves and damn near every single thing
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  because they want to matter, you know what I mean?
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  They'll try to like that. They have to center themselves
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  and pick. Not only are they centering
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  themselves, they are making themselves feel more valuable
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  than they are. You see what I'm saying?
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  It's just like narcissists. I and I say this before
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  narcissists, a lot of them or a lot of us or gold plated people,
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  you know, gold plated like this necklace I have on right now is
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  silver, right? So this silver is like Italy
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  925. Not very expensive but I can
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  take this and dip. It is in 24 karat gold plated.
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  And it look like it looks like real gold.
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  Or would it be shining, shimmering.
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  You mean it'd be like, where do you get the gold training from?
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  Oh, you know, just I got to. I got to connect.
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  No one. Damn.
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  Well, it's silver, you know what I mean?
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  It's gold plated, though. It looks like gold, feels like
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  gold. But real people can tell once it
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  goes under the test of scrutiny. And some testing kits have been
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  done to it. You can tell that it's not real
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  gold. Once a narcissist is under
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  stress. Once a narcissist is under
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  scrutiny, you could tell that they're not real gold, they're
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  gold plated peoples, but they want to.
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  They want people to think that they're gold.
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  They want people to think that I matter more than just that
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  original silver piece that I was.
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  You may not only nurses, a lot of them are not just silver,
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  they're copper. You may they're like copper,
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  copper rusted rusted copper and dipped in 24 carat carat carat
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  gold plating. You see what I'm saying?
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  They want to matter. They want to lift themselves up
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  because they want to matter more, even to themselves, not
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  only to themselves, but to you as well.
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  They want to convince you that, hey, look, I'm important too.
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  Hey, I'm important too. This is one of the nurses
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  running around online or another selfaware.
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  He's just so damn delusional that he's trying to clown people
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  for going to school because he didn't have, he didn't go to
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  school and get a degree or anything like that.
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  He's trying to devalue other people's degrees to make make it
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  seem like he's more important. Like I didn't go to school.
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  I made a better choice that I didn't go to school.
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  So I'm smarter than everybody who gets a degree projection to
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  the to the umpteenth power weirdo.
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  You see what I'm saying? But we don't name people.
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  These people will remain nameless out here, you know?
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  But this making people, trying to make, trying to bring people
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  down to lift themselves up because they are literally
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  worthless people, you know, they don't feel like they're worth
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  anything. They try to convince you that
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  they are, hey, I have this going on.
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  But internally they struggle. Internally, they battle.
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  Internally they don't feel like they're worth anything, but they
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  need to convince you of it. That's why they need to be, to
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  send their attention. I need the lights.
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  I need the lights to shine on me, right?
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  I need the lights to shine on me.
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  Because once the lights go out and the darkness creeps in, here
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  comes the shame. Once the lights go out, once the
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  gold plating wears off, once I go under the scrutiny, once
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  people start to realize who I am, the lights go off and people
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  realize who I am and myself worth and my value go away
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  almost instantaneously, go away almost instantaneously.
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  A question almost instantaneously or destroyed.
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  That's the process of it though. Y'all.
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  And I tell that to a lot of people like this is the this,
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  this is the the dynamic that a lot of people have to deal with.
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  This is the space that a lot of people have to deal with.
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  Like if you're dealing with a narcissistic person, this is who
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  you're going to be dealing with. At the end of the day, they're
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  going to bring you, they're going to bring this into your
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  life. They have to make they they want
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  to matter so much. You mean in the in the process
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  of them wanting to matter. They make you matter less.
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  They they want to make you feel like you matter less.
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  Hey, I matter so much that people care so much about me
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  that you matter less. Your struggles matter less than
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  mine. Your Your success matters less
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  than mine. Your profitability matters less
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  than mine. Your achievements matter less
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  than mine. Because I I'm so down on myself
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  that I need to put you down to step on your back.
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  You see what I'm saying? It's like they it's like they
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  punch you in. It's like they put you in the
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  stomach, you fall to your hands and knees, and then they step on
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  your back to lift themselves up. They want to feel vital.
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  They want to feel vital. They do.
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  But that's the space a lot of them get into.
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  A lot of them fall into, they want to matter, they want to
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  feel vital, they want to feel important.
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  They want to feel all of this stuff.
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  At the end of the day, they just don't.
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  They can't. They don't have it.
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  They're not important. They're not smart.
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  They they will never live up to the standards that they they
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  will never live up to the image that they set for themselves
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  unless they go to therapy, put it in a lot of work, you know,
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  they will never ever live, live to the image that they convey to
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  you that they have. Hey, I have this great image.
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  I'm this great person. So, hey, I need to live up to
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  this. Hey, I need to live up to that.
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  You may. I need this.
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  I need that. I need this.
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  I need that. I need it all.
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  They want it all. They want it all from you.
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  And they'll take it all from you if you allow them to.
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  Yeah, they'll take it all from you.
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  They'll take all your worth and all your value, All your
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  accomplishments. They'll milk you.
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  They'll milk you of that. They'll drain.
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  They'll drain you of your resources.
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  Use you for your resources, Use you for your connections.
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  Use you for your success. And then they'll leave you.
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  They'll take this. They'll take the stuff off of
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  you and build up. Build themselves up to go next
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  and build somebody else up to go next and be with somebody else
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  to go next and do all this other stuff.
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  It's a process. Drop the mic.
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  Bear with me. Y'all, bear with me.
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  I dropped my mic. Got too hype.
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  There you go. Welcome back, welcome back.
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  But it's a process. Y'all you have to process it.
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  And if you're in a relationship with the nurses, y'all, it's
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  hard to not. It's hard to not compete with
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  them. It's hard to not let them.
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  It's hard to, when they try to make themselves the sense of
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  attention, it's hard to fight back and push back on that
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  because those are just cause arguments and they want to
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  trigger, they want to trigger a reaction.
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  Or if you, they want to trigger, you know, it's like a, you know
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  what they call it a pissing contest.
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  They want to be like I didn't. Well, you want to, You want to
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  compete. You want to compare, Let's
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  compare, Let's compare success. Let's compare, Let's compare
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  contributions. Let's compare achievements.
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  Let's compare accolade, let's do this, let's do that.
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  I'm better than you. You don't want to compete with
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  your partner. This is so deep.
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  I did it for a long time. I've competed with my partner
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  for a long time. I understand that.
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  I completely understand the ignorance behind it.
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  So I'm just I'm so against it right now.
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  I know it sounds hypocritical, but I've done it before so I'm
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  trying to trying to lead people away from that living their life
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  right there. Y'all competing with your
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  partners is healthy competition. Like we all pushing each other,
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  pushing each other is different than them pulling you down to
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  pick themselves up. Y'all understand that mean what
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  y'all have a one on 1 1/2 to do y'all.
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  I have some look, I have some courses coming up.
• 10:53
  I have some classes coming up. I have some I'm going to be
• 10:55
  traveling around doing more in person meetups.
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  The next in person meetup I'm trying to schedule for the end
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  of September, probably early October in probably be in Durham
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  NC Y'all self love healing growth meetup in Durham NC North
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  Carolina area. What not so more information to
• 11:10
  come. Y'all make sure y'all like and
• 11:11
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• 11:13
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• 11:16
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