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47. Feeling Stuck? Break Free From the Lies Holding You Back · Believe & Become | Ministry, Biblical Encouragement, God's Will, How to Change, Holy Spirit

• 0:00
  Speaker A: Is there an area of your life where you lack hope or peace or joy? Maybe you just wish you had more freedom. Often these feelings are caused by lies that we're believing. We call them limiting beliefs because they hold you back. Today we're going to talk about what they are, how to identify them and how to overcome them. Stick around. It's going to be a good one. If you're tired of leading others while secretly battling doubt, discouragement and mental warfare
• 0:28
  Speaker B: and you want practical tools to renew your mind and walk boldly in your
• 0:32
  Speaker A: calling as a leader, you're in the right place. Welcome to Believe and become.
• 0:36
  Speaker B: We're Josh and Corina your spirit filled coaches here to help you overcome those limiting beliefs and lead others confidently.
• 0:43
  Speaker A: If you're ready to hear God's voice more clearly, to step into your purpose and find joy and strength in the
• 0:49
  Speaker B: everyday silence those Bible app reminders judging you from your lock screen and let's jump in.
• 1:01
  Speaker A: So you want to hear God's voice again and you want clarity in your purpose. But you feel stuck and might be thinking is that God's voice or just me?
• 1:09
  Speaker B: Listen, it doesn't have to be this way. Our Clarity coaching program is designed to reconnect you to God's voice and demolish those lies trying to hold you back.
• 1:18
  Speaker A: As you work with us, you'll learn our simple, proven five step process for overcoming lies and limiting beliefs and reconnecting with God's truth.
• 1:27
  Speaker B: We'll give you the tools you need to succeed to move forward with confidence and stay plugged in to God's voice.
• 1:34
  Speaker A: Book your Clarity coaching session today to build confidence in your identity in Christ and move forward in your purpose.
• 1:40
  Speaker B: Just go to joshandkarina.com coaching that's J-O-S-H-A-N-C-O-R-I-N A.com coaching and book your first session now. So for many years I struggled with this lie that I wasn't enough, I'm not good enough, I'm not smart enough, I'm not pretty enough, I'm not literally fill in the blank enough. It was very much an identity lie, you know, based in things that I thought about myself, experiences that I had had. But then I also struggled with this lie that I'm too much and it's just like the enemy to just be super confusing, right? Because you would think that you can't be both of those at the same time. And it's true. But I felt like my emotions are too much, my feelings are too much. I'm loud and I have too many opin, and I scare people. Sometimes I'm too much. And so because I really, over time, allowed these to be my main narrative about myself, it caused me to start shrinking back, to not fully show up. When I did the things that I do best that I'm called and created to do. When I lead worship or when I speak, I would often just hold back. I didn't want to be too much. And I. At the same time, I struggled to believe that I had what it takes to really do the thing. And. And it would show up in conversations where somebody would say something, and I'm like, that's not what the Bible says. Or, no, that's. That's like, God doesn't think that about you. But instead of learning how to say it in love or just even saying, God doesn't think that, I. I would just not say anything because I was afraid that I would come on too strong or they would be mad at me. And so there was just this feeling of I can't be myself. And I even remember, I think it was a Sunday afternoon. I was just feeling so overwhelmed with all of these things. And we came home, and I just was, like, bawling my eyes out to Josh because it was like, I'm not enough. I can't be enough. I can't be all the things. I can't do. This. And it. It really felt like this heavy burden. And you praise God that we don't have to live under those lies. But I know that feeling of I. I want to be who God made me to be. I don't know how to be that. And not recognizing that it was really rooted in these lies that I was believing that were holding me back. I went through this process of, you know, doing some inner healing. And really, like, it was funny because I actually found notes that I had gotten at my first inner healing session that I ever did. And literally, God was like, you are enough. You know, and it was. I don't. Ten years later, I found it. I had just done another one, and I think the notes were almost verbatim. He just kept telling me, you are enough. Like, I made you the way that I made you on purpose. And recognizing that I have matured and I have, you know, learned to be myself without hurting other people's feelings, without coming on too strong, which I probably still will sometimes. But just being okay with that. This is who God made me. And sometimes I'm loud and sometimes I'm too much, and it just has to be okay. But I'm never too much for God. And I think when we root our identity in him, when I get grounded in, he loves me because he loves me, because he made me. And he made all of the weirdness and quirks about me and all of the beauty and all of the things, all the things, the good and the bad. Just because other people don't like them or don't know how to receive them, doesn't mean that I have to hold them back. But it was this process. Obviously, over, you know, 10 years, God is telling me the same thing over and over. It was a process of, of really leaning into what does God say? And renewing my mind with that truth. But then also in situations, learning I don't have to have all the answers every time. I don't have to be the one that does the whole thing. Like, I don't have to show up and be everything for everyone. I just get to show up and be me and wherever that fits. It's enough. And I don't have to be enough for everybody. I just have to be who God made me and that's enough. But it was this process of leaning into that identity as a daughter of God. What does that mean? And what does it mean to let him love me and to speak who I am into me and then renewing my mind with that over and over and over. And often that comes from sitting in his presence and listening to what he has to say. There are so many moments that I could kind of trace back and say, oh, when God spoke this, that really made me feel this way. Or then it, like removed that burden. You know, for me, it wasn't a one time thing where it was like, you know, poof, God zapped me and he said the right words and then I was just completely free. It was this process of, I think, maturing and growing into who I am in him. And I think it's still a process I'm in, of learning to be okay with just being a mess sometimes. And it's okay. God's okay with it. I'm not too much for him. And so I know, I think that's something that a lot of us struggle with, especially as women. We want to be everything. Like, we want to be super mom and we want to work and stay at home and, you know, pay the bills and like, we want to do all the things. And God's like, how about you just be who I called you to be and then let me fill in and take care of the rest and he just is so gracious in that way. So I just love that I didn't have to figure it out. I wasn't gonna figure it out by sitting in counseling or, you know, talking to even just, you know, I thank you that I've never been too much for Josh. But if it were you, like. But I. You know, even just sitting with you and, like, processing all those emotions and all the things like, that's not gonna fix it. Even though you say that I'm not too much or that I am enough or whatever it might be, I have to get that from Him. So it's just really sweet. That is always ready to speak into our identity, to tell us that we are loved and who he created us to be and to affirm us in that, even if other people don't get it.
• 8:05
  Speaker A: And I think that's a word for you, our viewers and our listeners. You're more than enough with Jesus. You're more than enough, and you're never too much. And you can be free to be who he created you to be. Cause he did it on purpose, and he didn't make a mistake. Some of us feel like, boy, God, you really messed up when you made me. Why did you make me this way? He didn't mess up. So we just want to encourage you and release God's grace over you, to be you and to know you're enough and you're not too much either way. I think we fall on either side of the spectrum or sometimes both, right? Apparently, because the enemy likes to lie to us and say, well, you're not good enough. But by the way, you're way too much. So could you just dial it back, be both? So one of those is a lie. Actually, they're both a lie. So we just want to encourage you with that. You can be you and you're good enough. So what are limiting beliefs? It's really anything negative that you've internalized and built a belief system around that's holding you back. That's why we call them limiting beliefs. But the key is that belief system, that's really what the Bible calls a stronghold, because it has a stronghold on your identity, who you believe you are. And so really, you have to be intentional about identifying those belief systems and partnering with God to tear them down. That's how we get transformed, by the renewing of our mind. Romans 12:2. It's all about partnering with God, identifying those lies and getting rid of them, replacing them with the truth. Otherwise those lies will continue to hold us back. And so these can show up as familiar thoughts that we have all the time. I'm not good enough. Like Corina was talking about, oh, maybe you're too much. You need to dial it back a little bit. Or may. Have you ever thought I could never do that? Maybe you see somebody else doing something that's a dream of yours, you go, I'm just. I could never do that. I'm not good enough. I'm not. Fill in the blank enough. Maybe it's just thoughts that you've thought about yourself for a really long time. And often we get these lies ingrained in us when we're children because the enemy knows we're vulnerable at that point. And so he targets children to try to get us to think wrong things about ourselves, other people, about God, our circumstances. Circumstances. And if he can just plant that one little lie and get you to believe it for the rest of your life. Oh, boy. Yeah. That he's kind of like gets to move on to somebody else and bug them. So a lot of times it will come from somebody with a lot of influence in our lives, like a parent. Maybe you had a negative experience when you were a child. Those can plant these lies that we just think, that's how it is. That's how life is. That's what I believe about life. Sometimes we're taught these lies, like our parents, our families. It's just, this is what we believe. And oftentimes that's built on experience. What your parents have experienced through their lives, through maybe their parents, or it's been passed down through your family. This is just kind of how we do life. This is how we view life. And so that is your normal, because that's what you grew up under. And you don't really realize until you start studying the Word. You start actually talking to God about those beliefs that you're having. Why do I have these negative emotions? And then he brings it up and says, actually, you believe this your whole life, but it's a lie. And I have something way, way better for you.
• 11:32
  Speaker B: Yeah. And that could even be things that your parents said a lot as you were growing up. Things that we've heard in our culture, even, you know, God helps those who help themselves, almost like in scripture, but that's not in Scripture. Just so you know. You know, things like that, where it's like, there's just this way of life, the way that we do things. Well, if I don't worry about it, who's going to worry about. About it? Or, you know, things like that. Where you have heard it over and over and over and you don't even realize that it's something that now you are perpetuating. Or you're saying. You catch yourself saying the same thing. Maybe something like, God, I'm so stupid. Right. Like as a child, maybe your parents wouldn't say that to you, or somebody in your class would say, oh, you're so stupid. And now it's like every time you can't do something or you get something wrong, oh, I'm so stupid. And we don't even realize we're partnering with those lies. And I think too, even not just as a child, but as an adult, we have experiences. We lose loved ones, we lose a relationship that was really valuable. Things happen. And even though we know the truth based on the word, our hearts start to believe something different. And so we begin to respond in a way that is contrary to the truth that we think we believe. But actually your feelings tell you what you really believe. So if you feel hopeless about a situation, if you feel like it's just not, nothing's ever going to work out. All of those negative things that we've mentioned, that's often rooted in a lie, and it's going to hold you back. When we believe lies, we can't help but be held back from the fruitfulness and the beautiful life that God has for us because we have to believe the truth in order to move forward with him.
• 13:13
  Speaker A: Yeah. And that's how we identify these lies that we're believing, the limiting beliefs. Corina said it great. It's how where we're lacking hope or joy or peace, where we're lacking freedom, especially if you're. If you're feeling afraid or anxious or discouraged about a situation, those are all huge red lights. It's an indicator that you're believing a lie. It's important to dig into those. Anything that you're meditating on that's not from God. Those are all potential sources of lies that you're believing, potential indicators that you have a limiting belief. God wants you to be free. He doesn't want you to stay stuck. He wants you to keep moving forward and release you from those. Jesus came to break all those chains and to set the captives free. If you're believing a lie, you're captive, you're bound, and you don't even realize it. Jesus already set you free from those. And so it's just this process of allowing God to identify those lies and replace them with the truth.
• 14:09
  Speaker B: I think that we don't think that we Meditate on things. Because when we think about. When Christians think about meditation, we often associate it with yoga or, like, Buddhism, you know, and, like, we think about somebody up on a hill somewhere, you know, doing their little yoga pose. And we don't have this. The same idea of meditation that the Bible does, which is really just ruminating on something, repeating it over and over. And so I like to kind of remind people that, you know, often if we have a conversation that doesn't really go well, you'll replay that in your mind over and over. And then she said this, and then he said that, and then I said this, and then what I should have said, and then they would have said, right. And we go back and forth and we have this whole new conversation in our head that never happened, but we get worked up about it anyways. It creates feelings, it creates a new reality, because next time you see that person, you have something to say, right? And so we, we meditate on things all the time. Or if your spouse is late for dinner, you can create a whole new life basically, where, you know, all of the bad things, they, they got in a car accident, they're cheating on me. Like, there's so many, like, alternate realities that we could, you know, 10 minutes or 15 minutes of your spouse being late from work or wherever they're coming from. That's meditation. Yeah, that's all it is when we play things over and over in our mind. And so when you're meditating on the lack in your life, I don't have money for that. I can't afford this. I don't. Whatever. Fill. You know, we always say fill in the blank because it literally can be any lie that the enemy is telling you. I. I'm not good enough. I can't do that. I'm not smart enough. And you're. You're meditating on the. Those things when you're thinking about them, when they're coming out of your mouth. You know, the Bible says that out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. And so what you've been meditating on is the stuff that's going to come out of your mouth. So is it fearful? Is it hopeless? Is it joyless? Is it angry? That is such a huge indication that we're not believing the truth. And so today we want to talk about how do we identify those lies? I mean, that's the big. The biggest thing. Where we lack hope, where we lack peace, joy, freedom. But then how do we overcome those? What do we do to break off those limiting beliefs? Because that's what we're all about. That's what we want is we want to walk in the fullness of what God has for us and to live transformed lives.
• 16:39
  Speaker A: So let's get practical. How do we. What are the steps that we take to identify those lies and to replace them with the truth? And the first thing to do is really to let God lead you. So sometimes it can be hard to hear what God's saying to you, or especially if you're wrapped up and fear, anxiety, or these negative emotions can be very strong that can make it hard to hear what God is actually trying to say into your life. Letting God lead the conversation. Remember, when we're praying, a lot of times we do all the talking. Well, that's not really a conversation. God wants to actually speak back to you. In fact, he really wants to enter it into the conversation. It's good to just let God lead the conversation. I like to say, God, what do you want to talk about? You know, sometimes we're all wound up about this situation of over here. Of what? That negative conversation that we. That didn't go well, or some situation at work or whatever's going on with your finances or with your children. Anything that's got you stressed out. You're like, God, I need an answer for this. Sometimes God wants to get a little bit deeper and say, actually, let's. We'll just put that on the back burner for now. There's something more important that I want to talk to you. So let God lead you into what are the lies that I need to deal with? What are the situations that you want to talk about? Often we're focused on the symptoms of, you know, this is what's happening in my life. But God always wants to get down to that root issue so he can tear it out and replace it with something really good.
• 18:11
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 18:11
  Speaker A: So let God lead you through this process. That's the most important thing.
• 18:16
  Speaker B: And then ask the right questions. God, what do you want to talk about? Like Josh said, we're giving him place to come in and speak. Instead of God, what do you. About this situation? Or God, what am I supposed to do in this situation? Right, God, what do you want to talk about? Because I might want to talk about my finances, but he might want to talk about being a good steward. Right. I might want to talk about that thing that I really need the money for, but he might want to talk about something else. When I come to him in that place of humility, of God, lead me, then we can probably get further than. If we're. If I'm just bringing all my anxiety to him. And, God, is there something that's keeping me from hearing your voice? Because often we're. You know, there's so many things like anxiety. We've talked about that a lot. That when you're not in a place of peace, it's really hard to hear God. Maybe it's the way that you were raised. You weren't raised to listen to God's voice, and so you don't even know if you can hear from him. Maybe you thought you heard God in the past, but then you got it wrong, and so now you're worried that you can't hear him. So, God, is there something that I'm believing that's keeping me from hearing your voice? What's holding me back in this place? And then, God, what do you want me to know about this? Here's the situation. I'm laying it before you. God, what do you want me to know about this? Not God. Fix it. Not God. Tell me what to do. Not. Do you see the difference? There's a difference between here's all of the stuff that's going on and all of the thoughts and, you know, and all the things I think. And then. And what do you think? No, God, what do you want me to know about this? Because maybe we want. We want God to tell us the solution, but he wants to talk about something else. And I think that's the really important part, that it's not always exactly what we think it is. It's often something much deeper. We want to fix the symptoms, and we want a band aid. Right. It's like your little kid who comes with their splinter, and they're like, I need a band aid. And you're like, actually, I have to pull out that splinter. And they never, ever want that. But it's the only way that it can heal God. Often he just wants to get to the root issue so that we can move forward in freedom.
• 20:21
  Speaker A: Yeah, God's not into band aids. He's really not cures.
• 20:24
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 20:25
  Speaker A: And then he's really good at it.
• 20:26
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 20:27
  Speaker A: And I already mentioned this before, but our next step is just to listen. Remember that praying is as much listening as it is talking. I don't know about you, but when I was learning about prayer, I thought it was just me talking. I didn't realize it was supposed to be a conversation. But God, he's so good. He wants to speak to you. He's going to speak to you when you became a Christian, he spoke to you that first time. He's going to continue to talk to you and to lead you. You. Yeah, he's a good father. He doesn't just leave you alone to figure it out on your own. He wants to continue to lead you and guide you. And he's going to speak through his Word. He's going to speak through. Maybe you might hear a kinder, gentler version of your own voice in your head, or you might see a picture, or you might have a feeling or knowing. He also speaks through music, through videos, through books that you're reading. Any way that God can communicate with you, he's going to do it. And he's always speaking to us. And we get. Sometimes it's just easier sometimes to talk about the problems. You get it off your chest. We're venting to God, but then we don't actually stop and go, okay, God, what do you think about this? And that listening step is the key, and that's the next step in our relationship with God. I think so many of us accept Jesus and then we do all the talking. But how's God gonna. He needs to get a word in edgewise sometime. He needs to speak into the situation. You just have to pause. Pause and let him speak. Listen, pay attention to what you're experiencing throughout your life, and then pay attention to what he's saying.
• 22:01
  Speaker B: Yeah, I think it's. It's. Sometimes it feels hard to be still.
• 22:05
  Speaker A: Absolutely.
• 22:06
  Speaker B: It feels hard to not have input or output. Right. I remember when we were first married and you would go to work and I used to substitute teach. So some days I would work and some days I was home. And those days when I was home, it was just like. Like, so quiet, you know? And so I'm turning on the TV even if I wasn't watching it, just so that there would be noise in the house and I wouldn't feel so alone. But looking back, I'm like, gosh, if I had just known how to harness those hours with Jesus, that would have been. That would have been a better option. Filling them with his voice instead of noise. But we do that. We're used to constant input to the radio, to the television, to our. Our phone, social media, whatever it might be, Netflix, YouTube. We always have noise. And if it's not noise that we have turned on, it's the people around us. It's life happening. And so to get still before him can feel really hard. But it's so important that we create that space. And for me, at first, that was like, five minutes of just, like, I'm gonna be quiet and listen, and I'm not gonna, like, reach for my phone in just five minutes and had to grow from there, but just starting somewhere, even if it's two minutes where you just sit in silence and listen so that you can really grow that muscle of listening to him. Because it can feel really hard if you're not. Especially if you're not like a naturally quiet person, it can feel hard. And I think that often quiet people have a lot more going on inside in your brain. You're thinking about all the things, and so you have to calm that down so that we can make space for him to speak.
• 23:45
  Speaker A: So the next step we're gonna do is to actually, once we've identified the lies, by listening to God and allowing him to bring those up, following his lead. Here's an area where maybe you lack hope. Here's the lie that you're believing about that we're gonna break up with that lie. You're gonna renounce it and say, I refuse to believe this anymore. I confess that I believed it for way too long. God, thank you for taking this away from me. I give it to you, Jesus. You dealt with it on the cross. I don't have to believe it anymore. And then we just ask him for the truth. God, what's the truth that I need to believe about this situation? What do you want to give me in place of that lie? I spent a lot of time just trying not to think negative thoughts, and it was pretty hard. Anytime you try to not think about something, you're going to think about it, right? But anytime that lie would pop up, I'm taking my thoughts captive. I'm not going to think that. I'm not going to think that. It wasn't until I decided or I learned, actually, let's replace that with the truth that is so much more powerful. This is the lie I'm believing. Here's the truth that God spoke to me and that I found in your Word. I'm going to say that Bible verse. I'm going to say that truth to myself every time that thought tries to come back. And then you're actually reprogramming the way that your brain thinks. You're renewing your mind with the truth.
• 25:01
  Speaker B: Yeah, And I love that verse that we take every thought captive because then it says to make it obedient, obedient to Christ. And so whenever, like, often when I have a thought come up where I know that's not the Lord, but it feels really Relentless, Like I can't stop thinking. I'll say it out loud. I'm taking these thoughts captive and making them obedient to the mind of Christ. And then, then I'll say, jesus, what do you think about this? Just so that. That I'm making it known. I'm not partnering with this. And I'm gonna only listen to the Holy Spirit. I'm only gonna listen to Jesus. If I make it obedient to the mind of Christ, then I have to know what. And so either that means there's a scripture that he's going to bring up to counteract that lie, or he's going to speak something to my heart that is the truth that I can hang on to. And then write it down. Write down what you hear and turn it into a declaration. Begin to say the thing that the Lord said to you over yourself. This is how we partner with the truth to renew our minds daily. And I would say multiple times a day when, like Josh said, whenever that lie comes up, speak the truth. This is the truth that God told me. This is the truth that I'm standing on. Partner with the truth so that you can renew your mind and allow those new neural pathways to build and you can begin to think like Jesus.
• 26:22
  Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, God designed our brains. He knows how they work. So he put the wisdom in the Bible, and science finally caught up with what God's been telling us for a really long time. I love that he's actually built us for mind renewal and to be able to change ourselves if we just partner with Him. And right now, I just. Just feel the grace of God coming on you to defeat those lies that you've been believing for way too long. God's taking care of them. He's going to make them real clear, real obvious for you, and then he's going to release the truth that you can renew your mind every single day to disempower those lies. That's how we wage that spiritual battle. We're going to take down those lies. We're going to defeat those strongholds. You're going to do that with God's grace. He's giving you the power to do that. It's not by your own strength. Strength, it's by God's strength.
• 27:07
  Speaker B: Yeah.
• 27:08
  Speaker A: That's the beauty of grace. He actually says, okay, here's what you need to do, and I'm going to give you the power to do it. All we have to do is say yes to the process. And right now, you're really good at saying yes. To God's process.
• 27:20
  Speaker B: Amen to that. If this is something that you would like help with, we've actually created a free guide for you with five steps to overcome lies that hold you back. And so you can find that@joshandkarina.com the number five steps and the link will be in the show notes. And we would just love to come alongside you on your journey to renewing your mind, to overcoming those limiting beliefs, those lies that are holding you back so that you can walk in true freedom and be transformed into who God made you to be. So go to joshandkarina.com five steps link is in the show notes. We would love to just empower you with this. This tool.
• 27:59
  Speaker A: So make sure you grab that free guide and try it out. Actually do it. Yes, go do it. Because it works. As you can tell, we're real passionate about this. This is one of our favorite things to talk about. Let us know how it. We would love to hear from you. If you have a great breakthrough, we'd love to hear that. If it was hard, let us know too. We want to help you out in that process. So thanks for listening, thanks for watching, and we'll see you on the next episode.
• 28:26
  Speaker B: Hey, friend. We hope you enjoyed today's episode. If so, would you take 30 seconds to share this podcast with someone who may need encouragement or practice tools for fighting their battle?
• 28:36
  Speaker A: Then rate and review this podcast. Help us spread the message of transformation far and wide.
• 28:42
  Speaker B: All right, time to walk back into the noise with peace, purpose and maybe a tiny bit of guffing.
• 28:47
  Speaker A: We'll meet you back next Thursday for another episode. Bye.