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Episode #3948 The New Phil Hendrie Show Radio · The World of Phil Hendrie

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Speaker 1: The following is a world-famous Phil Henry Show encore presentation.
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Speaker 1: And now, the Coach Vernon Dozier Show on the world-famous
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Speaker 1: Phil Henry Show. Coach Vernon Dozier, a football coach and
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Speaker 1: player for the last half century. Coach Vernon Dozier. Well,
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Speaker 1: thank you, and a very pleasant good day to all
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Speaker 1: of you, and this is the Coach Vernon Dozier Show.
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Speaker 1: And I, first of all, want to express my appreciation
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Speaker 1: to Phil Henry, who has allowed me to use this space,
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Speaker 1: these airwaves, to express my opinions and my feelings on
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Speaker 1: a great many subjects that affect the world of sports,
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Speaker 1: football especially, and the greater culture beyond that. I'm a
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Speaker 1: high school football coach, yes. I'm also a senior class
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Speaker 1: advisor for current affairs. I teach California history at Belmar Academy,
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Speaker 1: a Catholic high school, a co-educational Catholic high school. in Glendale, California.
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Speaker 1: I'm originally from San Antonio, Texas. I came to California
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Speaker 1: as a college student. I played football in college, Cal
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Speaker 1: State LA and Occidental, and I went on to a
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Speaker 1: professional career. I said went on to a professional career.
1:10
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to say professional queer. I went on
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Speaker 1: to a professional career in Canada, and then I played,
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Speaker 1: I mean, then I went on to a professional career
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Speaker 1: in Canada. One thing I failed to mention in college
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Speaker 1: and in high school, I was quite a proficient dancer.
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Speaker 1: I danced in a few musical productions, West Side Story,
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Speaker 1: a number of things that were popular when I was
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Speaker 1: in school, Godspell. I continued dancing professionally between coaching jobs,
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Speaker 1: something that I frankly didn't want to have come out,
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Speaker 1: but it did, and it came out in a sloppy way.
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Speaker 1: There's nothing that I'm not ashamed of dancing. I danced
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Speaker 1: from town to town. I danced from job to job
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Speaker 1: just so I could put food on the table and
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Speaker 1: have something to eat while I was trying to fulfill
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Speaker 1: my dream of coaching football professionally, and then I coached college.
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Speaker 1: I did make a fairly decent living playing pro ball
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Speaker 1: in Canada, but I had to in the off-season work.
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Speaker 1: And sometimes I took dance jobs, ballroom dancing. Some nightclubs
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Speaker 1: would hire you to dance with a young lady. You'd
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Speaker 1: dance around a dance floor while people ate food. Anyway. Um,
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Speaker 1: I'm bringing that up now in case someone says, Oh,
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Speaker 1: have you heard the coach Dozier show? He used to dance.
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Speaker 1: Ha ha ha. Yeah. I used to dance. Uh, I,
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Speaker 1: I danced not, I didn't flit around like Fred Astaire
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Speaker 1: or something. I danced because I was hungry. I danced
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Speaker 1: because I needed to eat. Okay. I danced because I
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Speaker 1: had to put food on the table. I danced because
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Speaker 1: if I didn't dance, I die because at that time,
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Speaker 1: you know, I wasn't getting any coaching jobs. Now what
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Speaker 1: happened once I left playing and I danced from town
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Speaker 1: to town and then got a coaching job and then
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Speaker 1: the writers got a hold of that and said, hey,
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Speaker 1: Coach Dozier, it looks like he's dancing off to, it
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Speaker 1: looks like Coach Dozier needs to dance to another job.
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Speaker 1: How about if you just dance away from this team,
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Speaker 1: Coach Dozier? They had all kinds of, I'll never forget
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Speaker 1: one headline, Vernon Dozier dances right off the edge of
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Speaker 1: the dance floor, you know, 35 to nothing, something like that.
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Speaker 1: It sucked. I guess one of my friends here, Cookie Weltbron,
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Speaker 1: said that I would dance on down the road. Anyway,
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Speaker 1: it's kind of painful. But I had a good and
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Speaker 1: I have had a very good life. I'm married to
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Speaker 1: my wife, Mindy, who prefers to be called Mandy. She's
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Speaker 1: my second wife. My first wife, Carol, unfortunately succumbed to
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Speaker 1: a grave illness. Mandy, I married right out of high school.
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Speaker 1: I was a teacher at the same school she was
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Speaker 1: going to. And then when she got legal, I mean,
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Speaker 1: when she got old, she became an old lady. I mean,
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Speaker 1: she got old enough. Anyway, so I married her and
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Speaker 1: we've been happily married now for the last 20 years.
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Speaker 1: What I wanted to say is that the last three
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Speaker 1: years have been particularly difficult. Actually, the last four years
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Speaker 1: have been particularly difficult. The last four years At Belmar Academy,
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Speaker 1: we have had losing football seasons. This year, we went
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Speaker 1: two and seven. We went three and five. Let's see,
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Speaker 1: two and seven, two years ago, we didn't have football
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Speaker 1: last year because of the pandemic. Two years ago, we went,
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Speaker 1: I think, one and eight. And then three years ago,
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Speaker 1: we went three and five. So we have, or one
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Speaker 1: and seven, I don't know, but it ain't been good.
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Speaker 1: And what used to be a winning program, at Belmar
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Speaker 1: Academy has fallen on some tough times. Now I've, I've,
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Speaker 1: I've lived through tough times. I have, uh, you know,
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Speaker 1: like I said, uh, I danced and that's something I'll,
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Speaker 1: I'll never be able to live down, but, and I've, uh,
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Speaker 1: you know, fell in love with my wife while she
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Speaker 1: was still on a drill team at Belmar. Um, I
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Speaker 1: didn't fall in love with her. I married her while
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Speaker 1: she was still 18. but technically on the drill team
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Speaker 1: because they did some national tour. Anyway, I've, I've, I've
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Speaker 1: tried to live all of that down, but the one
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Speaker 1: thing that has been tough for me through it all,
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Speaker 1: the one thing that has been very, very difficult for
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Speaker 1: me to take and not because of anything he did,
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Speaker 1: but because of, I look in the mirror and I go, well, look, look,
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Speaker 1: what are you? And it's the success of a man
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Speaker 1: by the name of Andrew Siciliano. Now, I think I
5:42
Speaker 1: can put up on the screen, if you're watching on the,
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Speaker 1: what do you want to call, videocast, Mr. Hendry had
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Speaker 1: a picture of this man momentarily ago, but you can
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Speaker 1: go online and look up a picture of Andrew Siciliano.
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Speaker 1: And this gentleman is distinctive. Now, first thing I want
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Speaker 1: to say, because I know there's going to be a
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Speaker 1: lot of people who are going to say, what's your problem?
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Speaker 1: I got no problem. I got no problem. Here's a
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Speaker 1: picture of him here. I'll put this up on the
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Speaker 1: screen if I can. I got no problem with Andrew Siciliano.
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Speaker 1: I'm going to show you this gentleman's face here. He
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Speaker 1: is an accomplished professional football commentator, a professional football broadcaster.
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Speaker 1: He's the voice of the Los Angeles Rams. I don't know.
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Speaker 1: I knew he was the voice of the Los Angeles Rams.
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Speaker 1: He may still be the radio voice of the Los
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Speaker 1: Angeles Rams. Outstanding play-by-play man. Outstanding interview man. He works
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Speaker 1: on the NFL Network. He's also the host of their
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Speaker 1: Red Zone show. I mean, this guy's a very accomplished guy.
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Speaker 1: Very accomplished. And then I look at him, and I
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Speaker 1: listen to him on the radio. And now I look
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Speaker 1: at a picture of him, and, man, I just shake
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Speaker 1: my head, and I sit down, and I look at
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Speaker 1: myself like, what are you doing? Because when you see
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Speaker 1: Andrew Siciliano, what do you see? You see a handsome guy,
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Speaker 1: and he's got two ears. that are almost 90 degrees
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Speaker 1: straight out from the side of his head. These are large.
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Speaker 1: They are fan-like, if you will. And I'm not trying
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Speaker 1: to make fun of the man. What I'm saying to you,
7:22
Speaker 1: and I told my wife, she said, are you mocking
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Speaker 1: that man? I said, no, I'm not mocking him. You've
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Speaker 1: got to listen to me. Someone's got to listen to
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Speaker 1: me and understand. I'm saying that that man has overcome
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Speaker 1: because everybody makes fun of his ears. Everyone's saying, don't
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Speaker 1: run too fast. You might take off. Or that's a great,
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Speaker 1: what a wonderful thing to be able to rely on
7:41
Speaker 1: if you happen to fall off the top of a building,
7:43
Speaker 1: just start flapping those. I mean, all kinds of jokes,
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Speaker 1: some of which may be rooted in truth. I don't know.
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Speaker 1: I've never had big ears. I don't think he's able
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Speaker 1: to flap his ears and land. I'm pretty sure. But
7:57
Speaker 1: having said all of that, the point that I'm trying
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Speaker 1: to make is people make fun of him. I've seen
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Speaker 1: the comments. They laugh about it. They laugh and sing
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Speaker 1: and dance. and go, ha ha, look at the man
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Speaker 1: with the big ears. Well, guess what? The man's an
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Speaker 1: accomplished play-by-play man, accomplished broadcaster, accomplished commentator. The man is,
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Speaker 1: as I said, prominent on the National Football League Network.
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Speaker 1: He's been on ESPN. He is considered to be one
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Speaker 1: of the smart guys when it comes to observing football
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Speaker 1: in the United States. And he's done so, even though
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Speaker 1: he's got gigantic, these big, you know, what do you
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Speaker 1: call it? Mick Mouse or Mickey Mouse fans. I'm not
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Speaker 1: saying he looks like me. He could, there is a almost,
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Speaker 1: it's almost like Mickey Mouse only because he's a man.
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Speaker 1: He's not, obviously doesn't have any rodent features, but the
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Speaker 1: ears are about the size of, of, uh, the mouse. And, um,
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Speaker 1: here he is now, you know, he's taking heat, people
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Speaker 1: making fun. I'm sure when he was in school, people
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Speaker 1: laughed and danced and sang and said, ha ha Andrew Siciliano.
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Speaker 1: You won't go anywhere in life. Take a look at
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Speaker 1: those babies. Look at those radar screens you've got there
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Speaker 1: on the side of your head. No way, no way.
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Speaker 1: And he goes on to become one of the top
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Speaker 1: names in broadcasting and broadcast journalism in America. Now you
9:15
Speaker 1: take Coach Vernon Dozier. You take Coach Vernon Dozier and
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Speaker 1: a guy who's pretty good looking. Not the best looking
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Speaker 1: guy in the world, but My ears are normal size.
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Speaker 1: I've got a normal looking face. I don't, my nose
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Speaker 1: is pretty normal. I played football, married a beautiful woman
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Speaker 1: who's like 30 years my junior, got a happy marriage.
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Speaker 1: And I'm sitting here with three losing seasons. I can't
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Speaker 1: get anything going. This is it for me. I'm coaching
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Speaker 1: high school football. Think about that. At one time, I
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Speaker 1: was on a career track that would take me to
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Speaker 1: the professional ranks in the United States. I might have
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Speaker 1: played in the National Football League. I had three, four.
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Speaker 1: pretty good seasons in the Canadian Football League, but no,
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Speaker 1: I had to push on. I wanted to coach. I
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Speaker 1: wanted to do this. I wanted to do that. So
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Speaker 1: I danced, you know, as the newspaper writer in Hamilton,
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Speaker 1: where I played with the Hamilton Tiger Cats my last
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Speaker 1: year in CFL. He says, Vernon Dozier dances out of Canada.
10:18
Speaker 1: And somehow he got an underground shot. Someone took a
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Speaker 1: picture of me in a nightclub in Hamilton, and I
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Speaker 1: was skipping and dancing for the dinner crowd. And they
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Speaker 1: had hired me to do a couple of dance steps.
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Speaker 1: And this writer, this Joe Palooka, I don't know what
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Speaker 1: the hell his name was. He says, Vernon Dozier, dancing
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Speaker 1: all the way, dances across the border into the U.S.
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Speaker 1: for football opportunity. And it had a picture of me,
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Speaker 1: not in my football, not in my Hamilton uniform. Not
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Speaker 1: in my football uniforms. No. A picture of me going, we,
10:51
Speaker 1: you know. It's that kind of stuff. That's what happens
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Speaker 1: to me. And here's a man, Andrew Siciliano, who's overcome
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Speaker 1: two years that, man, he's picking up China with those things.
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Speaker 1: I don't get it. And yet there he is making
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Speaker 1: a success of himself. Making his family proud. Making his
11:14
Speaker 1: friends and dear ones, loved ones, proud of him. And
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Speaker 1: here's Vernon Dozier. And I got a piece of tail
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Speaker 1: for a wife and I'm good looking. And I'm sitting
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Speaker 1: here on my thumb, basically. And I'm sorry to be
11:32
Speaker 1: so graphic, but that's really what's going on. I had
11:34
Speaker 1: a pretty good career here at Belmar Academy. Coaching high
11:37
Speaker 1: school football in the United States is not a low
11:40
Speaker 1: rent gig. It can open some doors for you. It
11:42
Speaker 1: really can. Certainly can open doors into college coaching. And
11:46
Speaker 1: on and on. I'd already been in the college ranks.
11:47
Speaker 1: I've been in the professional ranks. But You know, I
11:52
Speaker 1: would appreciate a phone call every now and again from
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Speaker 1: someone saying, hey, coach, you know, the OC job opened
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Speaker 1: up over here, USC, or offensive coordinator, defense coordinator job
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Speaker 1: opened up over here at UCLA, what have you, San
12:03
Speaker 1: Diego State or something. Man, I didn't have call one.
12:07
Speaker 1: I'm sitting here with my thumb parked. I got a
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Speaker 1: life that, quite frankly, is stalled. Okay, I'll go, I'll
12:17
Speaker 1: go right ahead and say it. My life is stalled. Okay.
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Speaker 1: My life right now is sitting at an intersection with
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Speaker 1: a gigantic fuel truck right behind me and a whole
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Speaker 1: bunch of other cars around me. The light's green and
12:28
Speaker 1: I've just turned the key and there ain't nothing happening.
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Speaker 1: And I got to get out of the car and
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Speaker 1: wave at people and try to push it. I'm doing well,
12:39
Speaker 1: who pushes a car? You know, I can't push. No
12:41
Speaker 1: man can push a car. And plus you can't push
12:43
Speaker 1: it when it's in gear. And that's what I'm doing.
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Speaker 1: I'm like standing behind it trying to go and looking
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Speaker 1: like an idiot, you know. That's me. That's what I'm
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Speaker 1: doing right now. And a man who has ears like
12:56
Speaker 1: two garbage can lids just stuck to the side of
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Speaker 1: his head. And like I said, and I mean this
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Speaker 1: and say, he must be picking up China on those things.
13:04
Speaker 1: He must be picking up shortwave on those things. And
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Speaker 1: yet he has made something of his life. And I'm
13:12
Speaker 1: out there, thumb parked, trying to start a stalled car,
13:17
Speaker 1: trying to start a stalled career, doing a couple of
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Speaker 1: ballroom dance steps, trying to see if I still got it.
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Speaker 1: I mean, I did that the other day. That scared
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Speaker 1: me to death because I was in the living room
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Speaker 1: and my wife said, what are you doing? I said,
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Speaker 1: I'm doing a couple of, I hadn't even noticed, but
13:32
Speaker 1: I was doing a couple of little mamba steps and
13:35
Speaker 1: doing a salsa. I had my hand on my stomach,
13:36
Speaker 1: the other hand up in the air and going, you know,
13:40
Speaker 1: and she's going, what are you? And I realized, I said,
13:43
Speaker 1: God Almighty, I didn't even know I was doing that.
13:45
Speaker 1: I guess I'm practicing some salsa steps because I don't
13:48
Speaker 1: know if I'm going to be coaching football. I don't
13:50
Speaker 1: know if I'm going to be coaching football next year.
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Speaker 1: Three losing seasons, a career path headed toward the National
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Speaker 1: Football League. I'm sitting here practicing mamba steps with a
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Speaker 1: career that has got four flat tires parked at an
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Speaker 1: intersection in downtown L.A. on a hill in San Francisco,
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Speaker 1: if you will. And Andrew Siciliano with a couple of
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Speaker 1: ears that said he would be proud of, they could
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Speaker 1: pick up Pluto on these things. Me. Forget it, but
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Speaker 1: he's made some of his life when he's got people
14:28
Speaker 1: making fun of him. Now, somebody said to me, coach,
14:30
Speaker 1: you know, on the air today, talking about it, you're
14:32
Speaker 1: going to be making fun of him too. No, I
14:33
Speaker 1: am not. I think I've made that very clear. No,
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Speaker 1: I am not. I've told you that Andrew Siciliano is
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Speaker 1: an accomplished broadcaster. I'm trying to figure out how can
14:46
Speaker 1: a guy with two ears that you could easily use
14:53
Speaker 1: as catcher's mitts. I mean, just take him off the
14:56
Speaker 1: side of his head, put one on each hand, but
14:59
Speaker 1: you could catch Koufax and Nolan Ryan at the same time.
15:04
Speaker 1: And yet he's overcome that. And he is, as I say,
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Speaker 1: one of the top broadcasters in America today, football broadcasters
15:12
Speaker 1: in America today. And I've just come off a 2-7
15:17
Speaker 1: season or whatever the hell it was. I don't even
15:19
Speaker 1: know anymore. Now, I've had a discussion with Father McCorders.
15:25
Speaker 1: He has said, yes, I'm welcome back next year, but
15:31
Speaker 1: I'll walk the sidelines sending in plays to a high
15:35
Speaker 1: school quarterback while a man who's got two ears that
15:39
Speaker 1: could track radio signals from the interior of the Milky Way,
15:42
Speaker 1: and he's kicking ass on the NFL network. Something's got
15:45
Speaker 1: to happen for me. I can't just have my wife
15:47
Speaker 1: come home at night and have my wife say to me,
15:48
Speaker 1: why don't you do a couple of Mamba steps? It'll
15:50
Speaker 1: make you feel better. I'm like, Jesus. She doesn't understand
15:54
Speaker 1: how that hurts. She'll say, Vernon, make yourself feel better.
15:59
Speaker 1: Get out in the middle of the living room and
16:00
Speaker 1: do a couple of Mamba steps. And she'll start going, Hey, yeah.
16:04
Speaker 1: Clapping her, you know, snapping her fingers. And I'll say,
16:06
Speaker 1: I tell you what, for the thoughts that I'm having
16:09
Speaker 1: right now, go ahead and back the, back the Hummer
16:11
Speaker 1: over my hand. And she'll say, what are you thinking?
16:13
Speaker 1: I said, I'm thinking, Bad. I'm thinking bad things. That's
16:16
Speaker 1: what she'll say. I better call the cops. I'll say,
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Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. But am I? The thoughts I'm having
16:21
Speaker 1: right now, the feelings I'm having right now of self-pity,
16:26
Speaker 1: while Andrew Siciliano has been able to achieve what he's
16:29
Speaker 1: been able to achieve with a couple of ears that
16:31
Speaker 1: could bounce the signals from spy planes and could be
16:34
Speaker 1: of real use to us in the intelligence community, he's
16:38
Speaker 1: got them stuck to the side of his head while
16:40
Speaker 1: he's doing Red Zone on the NFL channel. On the
16:43
Speaker 1: NFL channel. And what am I doing? I got no
16:47
Speaker 1: big ear problem. I got no big nothing problem. I'll
16:51
Speaker 1: tell you that right now. And yet, I'm here coaching
16:55
Speaker 1: high school football and doing mamba steps to keep myself
16:59
Speaker 1: from blowing my brains out. Ah. Oh, man. La. La. Ah.
17:16
Speaker 1: The Coach Vernon Dozier Show on the world-famous Phil Hendry Show.
17:26
Speaker 1: Let me in here. Stick around for the further adventures
17:30
Speaker 1: of Kenny Slag. I'm Coach Vernon Dozier. You stick around
17:33
Speaker 1: for something useful, okay? Where are you going? None of
17:38
Speaker 1: your business. You a mambo step? Aren't you a funny man?
17:47
Speaker 1: What is this that you're playing right here? Oh, surprisingly...