Latest / Reverse Jackass / Ep85: Nick finds out nobody was actually teabagging; Evelyn unleashes the Telepuppies.

Transcript

Ep85: Nick finds out nobody was actually teabagging; Evelyn unleashes the Telepuppies. · Reverse Jackass

0:00
SPEAKER_00: It's reverse.
0:08
SPEAKER_01: Welcome back to the reverse.
0:12
SPEAKER_00: Tip of the tongue.
0:13
SPEAKER_00: Tip of the tongue, the teeth, the lips, the tip of the tongue.
0:16
SPEAKER_01: Welcome back to the reverse jackass podcast, the podcast designed to bring peace between the US and Canada.
0:23
SPEAKER_01: A timely important uh podcast with incredible gravity and deep messages.
0:29
SPEAKER_01: I'm your host, Nick, and with me as always is your primary host, Evelyn, the Canadian Blade.
0:34
SPEAKER_01: Evelyn, say hello to the people.
0:36
SPEAKER_00: Hello.
0:36
SPEAKER_00: Hello, the primary host.
0:38
SPEAKER_00: I don't know if I want such a responsibility.
0:39
SPEAKER_01: Well, when I say I'm your host and with me is Evelyn, that makes you sound like Ed McMahon.
0:43
SPEAKER_01: Um, and that's not the dynamic that I want to set up here.
0:46
SPEAKER_01: So I can be the host with first billing, and you can be the primary host with second billing.
0:50
SPEAKER_00: Okay, okay.
0:50
SPEAKER_00: But I'm leading it in.
0:53
SPEAKER_00: That I mean, I'm totally fine with that.
0:55
SPEAKER_00: Although what I'm not fine with is you forgot the most important descriptive when you said designed, you forgot to say ergonomically designed.
1:02
SPEAKER_00: Because we are nothing.
1:05
SPEAKER_00: This podcast is nothing, if not ergonomically extreme.
1:09
SPEAKER_01: Ergonomically extreme.
1:11
SPEAKER_01: That's us.
1:11
SPEAKER_01: So we're glad you're here.
1:12
SPEAKER_01: We hope you're ready to get extreme with us.
1:15
SPEAKER_01: Uh, side note, my sister's husband did this incredible thing in the in the late 90s, early 2000s.
1:21
SPEAKER_01: When do you remember there was that like period where extreme was a word they were using to brand stuff?
1:25
SPEAKER_01: And a lot of times they were just knocking the first X off and just making it like capital X.
1:29
SPEAKER_00: I mean, X was like always really slashed looking.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like Oh God, yes, exactly.
1:33
SPEAKER_01: So he did a thing where if he if he saw something that labeled itself as extreme, he bought it and tried it.
1:39
SPEAKER_01: And so he and so we called him extreme Sean for a couple of years, where like he would go, and it didn't matter what it was, if it said extreme, he bought it and he tried it.
1:46
SPEAKER_00: And it was the experiment was um neon in color and and aggressive, and it was both super caffeinated, and like I think that's a fascinating.
1:58
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
1:59
SPEAKER_00: I would watch it, I would watch a Netflix documentary on that whole like that whole experience.
2:04
SPEAKER_00: That's fantastic.
2:06
SPEAKER_01: Netflix has missed him so far, but I'm hoping one day they will rectify that.
2:09
SPEAKER_00: They're gonna pull a big guy U-turn, an extreme U-turn, if you will.
2:13
SPEAKER_00: And they're gonna come back around and pick him up, and it's gonna be great.
2:17
SPEAKER_00: I'm here for it.
2:18
SPEAKER_01: Is a four-point turn, just so you know.
2:20
SPEAKER_01: It's uh you might have learned about the three-point term and drive turn and driver's head, but we're we added a fourth point, and it's it's heavy duty.
2:27
SPEAKER_01: You're not gonna believe where you're not gonna believe where that fourth point lands.
2:31
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
2:31
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I love this.
2:32
SPEAKER_00: This is so good.
2:33
SPEAKER_00: Okay, well, Netflix, obviously you're listening to this, so you just email us at reversejackass at gmail.com and we'll Yeah, and I'll hook you up with Sean.
2:40
SPEAKER_00: You'll look that sounds good.
2:41
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
2:42
SPEAKER_01: Um, so in the meantime, it occurs to me that um that I have begun to go to the well of dating stories more often recently.
2:49
SPEAKER_01: But yeah, it turns out that having been married for a while, I forgot some of the more fun dating stories that I have.
2:54
SPEAKER_01: And so today I have another dating story for you.
2:56
SPEAKER_01: And the theme of today's story is hot beverages.
3:00
SPEAKER_00: Hot beverages.
3:01
SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's where I see I need some kind of I need some kind of stinger in here for something.
3:06
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
3:07
SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's just a hot beverage air horn.
3:10
SPEAKER_01: Hot beverage.
3:11
SPEAKER_01: Well, this is we're gonna need two air horns to this episode because there's there's more than one kind of teabag out there, Evelyn.
3:16
SPEAKER_00: Oh gosh, oh my gosh.
3:18
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
3:18
SPEAKER_01: And I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I want you to start thinking about meanings of that because I'm not sure you know where this is going.
3:23
SPEAKER_01: Um, we're gonna work blue today.
3:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I'm gonna tell you that uh I had I went on a few dates with a woman about 20 years ago.
3:32
SPEAKER_01: And you know, it was in that period of just starting to get to know each other and just telling one another about our lives.
3:38
SPEAKER_01: And she told me about her parents, and I told her about my parents, and you know, just the kind of stuff you do when you're getting to know people, right?
3:44
SPEAKER_00: Yep, yep.
3:45
SPEAKER_01: And so I went and visited her at her place, and as you do, you show you show off stuff and you talk about your friendships, and she started telling me about a friend's bachelorette party that she had been to um gosh a couple of years ago.
3:57
SPEAKER_01: Okay, and I think the topic was strippers, was what we were talking about.
4:00
SPEAKER_01: And she mentioned that there was a male stripper at this at this event, which, you know, pretty standard fare, not a not a big deal, right?
4:08
SPEAKER_01: I'm not a prude.
4:09
SPEAKER_01: And she said, but he was he was gross.
4:11
SPEAKER_01: And I said, he was gross, and because I'm imagining he would be immaculate.
4:15
SPEAKER_01: And she's like, Yeah, you know, like he was muscular, but he was like oily and he he kind of rubbed us the wrong way, and you know, like it just it was it was like not my fair.
4:24
SPEAKER_01: I didn't really enjoy it.
4:25
SPEAKER_01: No, just like just he he he wasn't bad.
4:28
SPEAKER_01: It sounds like he did his job, but it sounds like it was one of those things that you hear that as a man you hear women say and that you never totally believe, where they're like, Oh, I don't, I'm not into super chiseled guys with baby oil all over them in hot cops costumes, which is I say it, it's like, yeah, who would be into that?
4:42
SPEAKER_01: But like, you know, when you're imagining your loved one at this thing, it's right, et cetera.
4:46
SPEAKER_01: So she so she's telling me the story, and she's like, Yeah, I didn't like him, you know.
4:50
SPEAKER_01: And uh she showed me a photo of her and two of the other party attendees and this stripper, and he just looked like a you know, a regular stripper as far as it's like a regular stripper, yeah.
4:59
SPEAKER_01: And I said, Oh, okay, you know, it seems like he's doing his job.
5:02
SPEAKER_01: She goes, Yeah, I didn't like it.
5:03
SPEAKER_01: Uh she said, I don't have another picture, but there's a picture of me teabagging him.
5:07
SPEAKER_01: Pardon?
5:08
SPEAKER_01: Uh do you know what I'm saying?
5:09
SPEAKER_01: Yes, I yes.
5:10
SPEAKER_01: Oh, you do?
5:11
SPEAKER_01: Okay, I thought I was gonna have to find a way to roundabout explain this on this podcast.
5:14
SPEAKER_00: Oh no, I've I've been aware, like I I've heard this term before.
5:19
SPEAKER_01: Okay, so yes, so you're familiar with teabagging.
5:22
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna go ahead and assume in 2026 that most of our audience is familiar with this term.
5:27
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna assume that there are very few people that haven't heard about this, and so for that reason, I will not describe what teabagging is.
5:34
SPEAKER_00: I am so grateful for you because I was honestly, I haven't heard a word you said for the last seven minutes.
5:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm thinking, how am I gonna edit this thing?
5:41
SPEAKER_00: No, I'm just yeah, exactly.
5:44
SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
5:44
SPEAKER_01: Just that well, uh the answer is rigorously.
5:47
SPEAKER_01: Um so she says, uh, and for those of you who don't, if you don't know what this is, don't feel ashamed because at one point none of us one of us didn't know, but don't Google it.
5:56
SPEAKER_01: Ask a friend, a loved one, a teenager, yeah, ask a loved one, ask.
6:00
SPEAKER_00: Email, you know what?
6:01
SPEAKER_00: Email us.
6:01
SPEAKER_00: We'll email you.
6:03
SPEAKER_01: We'll hit you with some fine internet content.
6:05
SPEAKER_01: No, we won't.
6:06
SPEAKER_00: Nick will explain it.
6:07
SPEAKER_00: Nick will send you he will, I will make him make a video.
6:10
SPEAKER_00: A step by step.
6:11
SPEAKER_00: A talk no, no, a talk and video.
6:15
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
6:16
SPEAKER_00: Check Wikipedia and if that if you come up dry from that, email us at reverse jack at Gmail.
6:20
SPEAKER_01: And don't bother the folks at Lipton.
6:22
SPEAKER_01: I don't want this to be our entree to them because I'm hoping to get advertising dollars from them down the road.
6:26
SPEAKER_01: So please don't ask them.
6:27
SPEAKER_01: Lipton, Tetley, David.
6:29
SPEAKER_01: All the big ones, yeah.
6:30
SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, yoga you can ask.
6:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that's fine.
6:33
SPEAKER_01: That's fine.
6:33
SPEAKER_01: We don't cook their tea anyway.
6:35
SPEAKER_01: So, anyway, so she says, Yeah, there's a picture of me teabagging him, and I was like, Really?
6:41
SPEAKER_01: And she goes, Yeah, and I start to feel bad because I don't want to be a prudent, I don't want to shame anybody.
6:45
SPEAKER_01: But if you just told me how gross this guy is, why would you do that?
6:49
SPEAKER_01: And why would you have a photo taken of it?
6:50
SPEAKER_01: So I said, Yeah, why did you do that?
6:53
SPEAKER_01: And she said, Well, we all did it.
6:55
SPEAKER_01: Oh, and I thought, Oh gosh, that's worse.
6:59
SPEAKER_01: That is worse.
7:00
SPEAKER_01: That's worse.
7:01
SPEAKER_01: She goes, Yeah, we all did it.
7:02
SPEAKER_01: I said, You you all did it?
7:04
SPEAKER_01: She goes, Yeah.
7:05
SPEAKER_01: She goes, you know, it was part of his thing.
7:07
SPEAKER_01: She goes, We all did it.
7:08
SPEAKER_01: We all had our photographs.
7:09
SPEAKER_01: Well, we all know that TW is part of his thing, you know.
7:12
SPEAKER_01: Right, exactly, exactly.
7:14
SPEAKER_01: The the uh perhaps the tenderest and most delicate part of his thing, right?
7:17
SPEAKER_01: And I thought, I don't know what to do with this information.
7:20
SPEAKER_01: Again, I don't want to shame anybody.
7:22
SPEAKER_01: We all get to make the choices we make, but as somebody who is who is like, you know, very newly maybe going to be a sexual partner with you, I admit this is gonna play into my calculus a little bit.
7:33
SPEAKER_01: Not the act itself, but the judgment involved in doing this, and the judgment involved the in in the photograph, the photography of such an act by you and all your friends.
7:44
SPEAKER_00: I have one very pressing question.
7:46
SPEAKER_01: Hit me.
7:47
SPEAKER_00: And I wonder if anyone else listening, and at this point, it's probably fewer and fewer people than we've ever had listen before, or exponentially more people listening.
7:56
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
7:57
SPEAKER_00: It's hard, it's hard to tell at this point.
7:58
SPEAKER_00: We'll have to check the analytics.
8:02
SPEAKER_00: Is the stripper not in varying stages of dress or undress?
8:06
SPEAKER_01: That's your burning question.
8:07
SPEAKER_01: Yes, they're a stripper.
8:08
SPEAKER_01: They're at varying stages of money.
8:08
SPEAKER_00: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
8:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm leading up to my question.
8:11
SPEAKER_00: So so this is implying that the stripper is completely nude?
8:16
SPEAKER_01: I don't, I mean, all you have to do is have I'm gonna I'm gonna finally say this word I've been avoiding.
8:20
SPEAKER_01: All you have to do is have your scroll amount.
8:22
SPEAKER_01: Like you can the right.
8:24
SPEAKER_00: Here's a dumb question that me or just a question, because I've actually never had the experience of having a stripper in my personal vicinity.
8:33
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
8:34
SPEAKER_01: Uh you've not brewed tea, as it were.
8:38
SPEAKER_00: I've I have not, and I really regret having a mug of tea to my immediate left during this this episode.
8:45
SPEAKER_00: Um is so okay, so he's partially exposed.
8:50
SPEAKER_00: Uh he's uh exposed in the most critical way.
8:53
SPEAKER_00: Right, sure.
8:54
SPEAKER_00: Okay, so all of our genitals are exposed, but I wasn't aware that having having them like having a st an experience with a stripper, you're allowed to put your mouth on the stripper.
9:07
SPEAKER_00: So is that where this is going?
9:10
SPEAKER_01: Well, I mean, you know what the act of teabagging is.
9:12
SPEAKER_01: It's a good thing.
9:13
SPEAKER_01: Yes, that's why I'm like, yeah.
9:14
SPEAKER_01: So I understand your incredulity.
9:17
SPEAKER_01: And the answer I I myself have as close to no experience with strippers as you can have without having no experience with strippers.
9:26
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
9:26
SPEAKER_01: I think it's different for different experiences and in different settings and for different workers.
9:32
SPEAKER_01: And I think that like there are some that let this happen.
9:35
SPEAKER_01: And I think that in certain situations, uh, I think the safety dynamic of being one uh apparently very chiseled cop or person cosplaying a cop in the room of a in a room full of women probably allows for more flexibility than the safety would of being one woman dressed like a very slight, promiscuous cop right in the middle of a bunch of men.
10:00
SPEAKER_01: Like I I don't know the particulars, but the answer, the real answer is like to not talk around it, yeah, there's some sex work involved sometimes, and some of them do it and some of them don't.
10:08
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
10:09
SPEAKER_01: I and that's that's just the longer choice.
10:11
SPEAKER_00: This is news to me.
10:12
SPEAKER_00: So I knew what the act was.
10:13
SPEAKER_00: I did not recognize that that's a we're all taking turns.
10:17
SPEAKER_01: Well, yeah, and this is what you can imagine my horror because additionally that that means there's saliva concerns here, right?
10:23
SPEAKER_01: Like that's this is like I don't know what the I don't know what the colloquial term is for somebody where where you share that that fact with them.
10:31
SPEAKER_01: You know, I know that there's like the the the term for like, oh, we both kissed the same girl, and then I don't know what the term is for we were all at this bachelor party and the dude teabagged is all in succession that we took photographs.
10:42
SPEAKER_00: Like I can't get past the term sloppy seconds.
10:44
SPEAKER_01: Like I don't know.
10:45
SPEAKER_01: Right.
10:45
SPEAKER_01: There's a reason they call it sloppy, right?
10:47
SPEAKER_01: Because it's not a clean act, right?
10:49
SPEAKER_01: So I am I am beside myself, and I think you're starting to understand.
10:52
SPEAKER_01: Hopefully, you and the listening audience out there are starting to understand my my disillusionment.
10:58
SPEAKER_01: I just I feel so many things right now.
11:01
SPEAKER_01: And I said, Why would why would you do that?
11:03
SPEAKER_01: And she said, Oh, everybody was doing it.
11:04
SPEAKER_01: And I said, Why would you have a photograph of taking that?
11:06
SPEAKER_01: And she was like, Well, you know, it was it was funny.
11:08
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, What was funny about that?
11:10
SPEAKER_01: And she was like, Well, you know, having a guy's testicles on your forehead is funny.
11:15
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, Oh, yeah, that's funny, but like teabagging, and she goes, That is teabagging, and I said, Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
11:28
SPEAKER_01: No, that's not that's having a guy's testicles on your forehead.
11:32
SPEAKER_01: I don't there's probably a term for that, but it's not one that I've been using since high school to make fun of people.
11:37
SPEAKER_01: That's just having that's a regular, that's a regular stripping act.
11:41
SPEAKER_01: When they place a part of themselves on your forehead, that's a that's just a you that often comes with the package kind of situation, right?
11:47
SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay.
11:48
SPEAKER_01: I mean, again, I don't again, different people do different things, but like okay, but like typically that's not terribly exotic.
11:56
SPEAKER_01: And then I explained to her what teabagging actually is, and she was like, Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
12:05
SPEAKER_01: I was not gonna, I was not gonna do that.
12:07
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, so you can understand why I was concerned why there there would be like photos of you and all of your friends doing that, like like the picture that that paints, and she's right, oh yeah.
12:15
SPEAKER_01: And it's like, okay, so that was a near miss.
12:18
SPEAKER_01: Oh gosh.
12:19
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna do that.
12:20
SPEAKER_01: And so when it didn't work out, that wasn't the reason it didn't work out.
12:23
SPEAKER_01: Like when it didn't work out between me and that woman, that was not the reason.
12:26
SPEAKER_01: But let me tell you, what a funny misuse of a term that ought not to be misused, a term that deserves and merits the most precision.
12:34
SPEAKER_00: Oh, it's up there.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: It's in there, right?
12:37
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's really like we're talking top 50 terms globally.
12:41
SPEAKER_01: Top 50.
12:43
SPEAKER_01: So my question for you, Evelyn, is Oh no.
12:47
SPEAKER_01: What's the hottest cop you've ever seen?
12:52
SPEAKER_01: So hottest cop I thought would be a funny prompt, but that's not the actual prompt because I don't know what your experience is with Lee's.
12:58
SPEAKER_01: But here's the actual prompt.
12:59
SPEAKER_01: The prompt is what is the worst misuse of a word that you've ever experienced in your life, whether it was you or as somebody else, what's the worst the moment where it's like, I don't think that word means what you think that word means.
13:10
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, right.
13:10
SPEAKER_01: Times a million.
13:11
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I just kind of gave you the I just kind of gave you the holy grail of examples, so you don't have to tie that.
13:16
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I can't I don't think I could.
13:19
SPEAKER_00: Also, as you're telling the story, I'm thinking specifically of a former student who listens to this podcast and he thinks we're hilarious.
13:26
SPEAKER_00: And I well, we are we we definitely are.
13:30
SPEAKER_00: I want I want you to know that I imagine this conversation is confusing for you.
13:36
SPEAKER_00: Former student.
13:37
SPEAKER_01: Um I mean if they're paying any attention to the dynamics, then they know that you got dragged into this.
13:42
SPEAKER_01: This is like that's true.
13:43
SPEAKER_00: I you know what I mean.
13:44
SPEAKER_01: They're hearing their former teacher get, you know, sort of surprise attacked by this story.
13:48
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah, it's true.
13:50
SPEAKER_00: Um, I can't help you through this.
13:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm processing my own trauma.
13:54
SPEAKER_00: So I just we're on our own here, and I hope you still respect me.
13:59
SPEAKER_00: The worst misuse of a word.
14:02
SPEAKER_00: Uh, you know, this is funny because it's probably only recently that I notice I misuse words, and it's in our conversations where I notice them the most because and I think because you have such a great vocabulary, I feel the need to up my own.
14:20
SPEAKER_00: But then the problem is is that I'm I'm shooting too far.
14:25
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
14:25
SPEAKER_00: I'm shooting too far.
14:27
SPEAKER_00: So so I need to, I need to to you know stay within my range, I think.
14:31
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, I must have heard so many things.
14:35
SPEAKER_01: Walking the trails with the dump diving divas, sharing vocabulary words, open and cool, it's full of poo.
14:43
SPEAKER_00: Human shit.
14:47
SPEAKER_00: Um, I can't okay.
14:49
SPEAKER_00: Oh, I don't have one that comes to mind, but I will say that when we were growing up, my dad taught us that the certain breed of dog, a small dog, was actually pronounced Chihuahua.
15:04
SPEAKER_01: Oh he just put a deposit in the joke bank and waited for it to wait for that bond to mature, right?
15:13
SPEAKER_00: It did.
15:13
SPEAKER_00: It took some time, but I will say my sister was the one that that opened that shaken can of coat.
15:23
SPEAKER_01: Do tell.
15:24
SPEAKER_00: In her, you know, in her friend group.
15:27
SPEAKER_00: Oh, you know, at whether it was high school or elementary school, she was the one who referred to it openly and out loud, surrounded by people as a Chihuahua.
15:37
SPEAKER_01: It was so funny that they missed that the rest of her story was about teabagging.
15:41
SPEAKER_00: That's right.
15:42
SPEAKER_00: They're like, Heather, it's not Chihuahua.
15:45
SPEAKER_00: It's Chihuahua.
15:47
SPEAKER_00: Wait, what?
15:48
SPEAKER_00: Wait, what?
15:49
SPEAKER_00: Also, was the rest of your story?
15:51
SPEAKER_00: No.
15:52
SPEAKER_00: So that was that's an example I can think of where I mean it doesn't quite fit this prompt, but there there was a sense of like using the wrong word, even though it wasn't a real, it was more using the wrong pronunciation, but on on purpose, on purpose.
16:09
SPEAKER_00: And yeah, dad was just waiting for that, like you said, that bond to mature.
16:13
SPEAKER_01: He was just waiting for the day that the doors like crashed open and one of you would come through and go, I can't believe I trusted you.
16:19
SPEAKER_00: I can't believe I said that.
16:20
SPEAKER_00: I can't believe I said that.
16:22
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, so we still we still joke about that a lot, and now it's like a it's a joke term in our family.
16:27
SPEAKER_00: Like if we see a chihuahua out and about, that's obviously what we call it, right?
16:32
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, out of respect, out of respect, because that's the only thing that's holding our family together uh at this point is respect.
16:40
SPEAKER_00: Prestigle respect at that.
16:41
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and chihuahuas.
16:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm really trying to think.
16:45
SPEAKER_00: This is really hard.
16:46
SPEAKER_00: This is a really hard one.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: I keep getting caught on incorrect pronunciation.
16:50
SPEAKER_00: So I'm thinking I'm gonna go down that it's your podcast, primary host.
16:54
SPEAKER_00: You can primary host.
16:56
SPEAKER_00: It is 49% my podcast.
16:57
SPEAKER_00: I can do her own.
16:59
SPEAKER_00: Um, my great-grandmother had her own vocabulary, as I'm sure many of us, uh, many of our older relatives do.
17:07
SPEAKER_00: Um, but we often called these terms, uh, her name was Ruberta, and we often called them Reberts.
17:17
SPEAKER_00: That's you know, great grandma said something, and I'm talking like, gosh, she was she lived to be almost a hundred, I think.
17:23
SPEAKER_00: Oh I'm trying to think when she passed.
17:26
SPEAKER_00: I was still really, really young.
17:28
SPEAKER_00: Anyway, so she had her own, she had her own vocabulary, and it was just things that were pronounced incorrectly.
17:33
SPEAKER_00: Okay, and the one I keep thinking of regularly is the color beige.
17:39
SPEAKER_00: She would always call it beigey, like with a hard G on beigey.
17:43
SPEAKER_00: Um, she was an avid sewer.
17:45
SPEAKER_00: She sewed and knitted, she was really crafty.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: If she was ever making a skirt or mending a pair of pants, she would refer to a particular area of the pants as the critch.
17:58
SPEAKER_00: And I'm I'm telling you right now, these are terms we all still use in my family.
18:03
SPEAKER_00: Like was she from Canada?
18:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh, yes.
18:06
SPEAKER_01: Interesting.
18:06
SPEAKER_00: Okay, do you know where she lived?
18:08
SPEAKER_00: Just guess.
18:08
SPEAKER_01: Your favorite time.
18:10
SPEAKER_01: Um, she was she in Inwood?
18:11
SPEAKER_01: Yes.
18:12
SPEAKER_01: No kidding.
18:13
SPEAKER_01: I like Inwood.
18:14
SPEAKER_01: I'm not like you.
18:14
SPEAKER_01: I'm not like a You've never been.
18:16
SPEAKER_00: You've never you don't have to.
18:17
SPEAKER_01: I've seen I took the video tour.
18:19
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because I sent it with all of my cynical comments.
18:22
SPEAKER_01: I know, you're so cruel, but I saw the VFW hall, I saw the rolling planes, the amber waves, I saw all of the rolling planes, the amber waves.
18:30
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, all of the the you know, the the stately pines, all of the things that Inwood has to recommend it.
18:35
SPEAKER_01: It doesn't have any of those things.
18:37
SPEAKER_00: It doesn't have any of those things, Nick, and you know it.
18:39
SPEAKER_00: Uh, you're just trying to make me look bad.
18:41
SPEAKER_00: And if you want to make me look bad, use something more meaningful than inward, Ontario.
18:47
SPEAKER_00: No, that wasn't an open invitation.
18:49
SPEAKER_01: That was one time, one time I heard Evelyn use the N-word.
18:54
SPEAKER_01: No, and then I did not.
18:56
SPEAKER_00: You never, ever have ever.
18:59
SPEAKER_00: And the amount of times you tell our audience that I did, they're gonna start thinking that I have some weird, racist, hidden undertone.
19:08
SPEAKER_01: Joking aside, I think probably if I only say it once, that's way more suspicious than I if I accuse you of it.
19:14
SPEAKER_00: Okay.
19:16
SPEAKER_00: Fair caveat.
19:17
SPEAKER_00: Evelyn's never said a word.
19:19
SPEAKER_00: Never, never.
19:20
SPEAKER_00: Never and wouldn't.
19:21
SPEAKER_01: That's why it's funny.
19:22
SPEAKER_01: Never and wouldn't.
19:22
SPEAKER_01: Because it's a really bad word, and that's why we would never do it.
19:27
SPEAKER_01: And you know who else is?
19:28
SPEAKER_01: If you turn the mics off.
19:35
SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
19:36
SPEAKER_00: If you turn the mics off, what you won't hear is Nick just crying.
19:39
SPEAKER_00: Just crying.
19:42
SPEAKER_01: Oh, I'm I'm I'm never more than a uh a child step away from crying in any part of my life.
19:50
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
19:50
SPEAKER_00: That's a fair, that's a fair admission.
19:52
SPEAKER_01: Um I'm sorry, grandma Roberta.
19:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, great.
19:54
SPEAKER_00: Well, you know, you know who else never said the N-word was my great grandma, that's for sure.
19:58
SPEAKER_00: Although maybe she did.
20:00
SPEAKER_00: I mean, she was an old white woman, so I just prefer to not think about that.
20:05
SPEAKER_00: So she said Beige, she said critch.
20:07
SPEAKER_00: Um, she referred to the country as Sarah Java.
20:10
SPEAKER_01: Oh, like Sarajevo?
20:12
SPEAKER_00: Sarajevo, yeah.
20:13
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
20:13
SPEAKER_00: Did I say country?
20:14
SPEAKER_01: Yes, it's not country, but yeah, that was the least of my concerns.
20:17
SPEAKER_00: That was fair, fair.
20:20
SPEAKER_00: Um, any kind of snow uh vehicle was called a snowmobile.
20:27
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
20:28
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
20:28
SPEAKER_01: Was she one of these people that that read a lot more than she talked?
20:33
SPEAKER_01: Because I had friends that were real bookworms when I was in high school and they had good vocabularies, but they would mispronounce things all the time because they never used it conversationally.
20:40
SPEAKER_01: They had only read it.
20:41
SPEAKER_00: Maybe.
20:42
SPEAKER_00: I don't actually know.
20:43
SPEAKER_00: Like my only memories of her when I was really, really little.
20:46
SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't even know.
20:48
SPEAKER_00: I wonder if she passed when I was a teenager or like an early a young teenager.
20:53
SPEAKER_00: I wonder if she passed.
20:54
SPEAKER_00: Like, I actually don't I don't remember when she passed, if I'm being really honest with you.
20:58
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
20:58
SPEAKER_01: Like I was young, but said heaven has another snowmobile.
21:07
SPEAKER_01: There's one more cringe in heaven.
21:09
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, exactly.
21:10
SPEAKER_01: It sounds it sounds like God needed another angle.
21:19
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you're not wrong.
21:20
SPEAKER_00: You're you're not wrong.
21:22
SPEAKER_00: Um, but she didn't like she used those words correctly, she just didn't pronounce them correctly.
21:27
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
21:28
SPEAKER_01: Well, that's good.
21:29
SPEAKER_01: I mean, I can't because I hate to see somebody, I hate to see somebody misuse the word snowmobile.
21:34
SPEAKER_01: It's always humiliating.
21:36
SPEAKER_01: You're like, hey, would you would you please pass the snowmobile?
21:38
SPEAKER_01: And you're like, Grandma, what?
21:41
SPEAKER_01: We're having a turkey dinner.
21:42
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and she's like, she's like, don't back sass me.
21:44
SPEAKER_01: Pass me the snowmobile right now, and later you find out she meant crushed black pepper.
21:48
SPEAKER_01: And you're like, Oh, no, how long has this been going on, grandma?
21:52
SPEAKER_00: No one's no one's great grandma's eaten crushed black pepper.
21:55
SPEAKER_00: Okay, like that's that's too spicy, it's too way too spicy.
22:00
SPEAKER_00: Um, I have a story, it's again along the pronunciation guide, so I do apologize for veering to work veering away from your story.
22:07
SPEAKER_01: It's it's it's 51% your podcast effort.
22:10
SPEAKER_00: Well, it depends on the day.
22:11
SPEAKER_00: Today, um today I'm wanting less of it for some reason.
22:13
SPEAKER_00: I don't I don't know.
22:15
SPEAKER_00: The so the person I have referred to the most on here in often these stories where something funny, unfortunately funny happens.
22:23
SPEAKER_00: We should come up with a name for this stupid person.
22:26
SPEAKER_00: No, well, maybe, maybe we'll know it when it hits us, I think.
22:29
SPEAKER_00: We'll we'll know.
22:30
SPEAKER_00: I might be running out of stories of this person, so it's probably not worth naming them at this point.
22:34
SPEAKER_00: But a friend and I, and if you've listened to an earlier episode where the windshield was crashed in and it was assumed to be another friend and I, that friend and I would spend an exorbitant amount of time trying to come up with words that we could teach him to say in the incorrect manner.
22:51
SPEAKER_00: Like so what the first one we did.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: How did I not though this is my new favorite fact about you?
22:58
SPEAKER_00: How did I not know this?
22:59
SPEAKER_00: Oh, um, the fact that I am just a little bit not very kind or like I don't know what we were downplaying, but it was the worst human being that ever lived.
23:07
SPEAKER_00: This is a I mean it's appropriate.
23:09
SPEAKER_00: I probably could have done something more direct.
23:11
SPEAKER_00: It's passive aggressive, is what it is.
23:13
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: So the first word we tried was saying the word virtuoso, and we would tell him it was actually pronounced virtuoso, like the U and the O were irrelevant, virtuoso, and we would we would only say it like that around him ever.
23:28
SPEAKER_00: Like we wouldn't say it like anyone else.
23:30
SPEAKER_00: And then so the kind of the win was that you win that word when you hear him say it wrong, and then you're like, next word, right?
23:39
SPEAKER_00: You kind of move on.
23:40
SPEAKER_01: Do you love this so much?
23:42
SPEAKER_01: This is literally and without exaggeration, my new favorite thing about you that I've ever heard.
23:46
SPEAKER_01: And this is becoming my favorite episode.
23:49
SPEAKER_01: I love this.
23:50
SPEAKER_01: How did I not think of this?
23:51
SPEAKER_01: This is brilliant.
23:51
SPEAKER_01: Okay, keep going.
23:52
SPEAKER_01: So brilliant.
23:53
SPEAKER_00: You can have this anytime you want.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
23:54
SPEAKER_00: I want it.
23:55
SPEAKER_00: The look on your face, I don't think I've ever done any professional work for you that has allotted such a look of awe and admiration on your face before.
24:05
SPEAKER_01: Your professional work, Evelyn, is brilliant, but this is brilliant.
24:08
SPEAKER_01: This is like and this is also the shit I live for.
24:10
SPEAKER_01: Your professional work is is important and it's well done and it's of the highest standard, and yet it doesn't give me meaning in my life.
24:19
SPEAKER_01: Shit like this gives me shit like this gives me purpose.
24:22
SPEAKER_00: This is so funny.
24:23
SPEAKER_00: That's so funny because I just want our listeners to understand that all the professional work I'm doing for Nick, the root of the content is Nick.
24:32
unknown: Yeah.
24:33
SPEAKER_00: So much more to me than that.
24:35
SPEAKER_00: And he literally just said it doesn't give me meaning in my life.
24:37
SPEAKER_00: Dude, it's all you.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: I know.
24:40
SPEAKER_00: I know.
24:40
SPEAKER_01: We've got to find some of this, some of this teaching my shitty uh ex-partner how to mispronounce words.
24:46
SPEAKER_01: That's what I need in my life.
24:47
SPEAKER_01: Here's so here's the best one.
24:48
SPEAKER_00: And maybe I've saved this for I should have said it's actually taybagging.
24:54
SPEAKER_00: It's not French, it's a French term coined by the Quebec.
24:58
SPEAKER_00: Sure.
24:58
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
24:59
SPEAKER_00: It would be.
25:00
SPEAKER_00: It would be.
25:02
SPEAKER_00: Um, this is the best word that we ever convinced him of, though.
25:06
SPEAKER_00: And knowing that you love this so much, I'm so excited to tell you this one.
25:11
SPEAKER_00: We told him and convinced him that the teletubbies were actually called telepuppies.
25:19
SPEAKER_00: How did you make that work?
25:20
SPEAKER_00: It's written on the screen.
25:22
SPEAKER_00: We just kept saying it.
25:24
SPEAKER_00: But also, this is like 2001, 2002.
25:30
SPEAKER_00: So we're not bombarded with media the way we are now.
25:32
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
25:33
SPEAKER_01: Telepuppies.
25:34
SPEAKER_01: Telepuppies.
25:34
SPEAKER_01: And do you remember?
25:35
SPEAKER_00: Oh my god, hearing you say it gave me hearing you say it gave me such a rush.
25:39
SPEAKER_01: That was so great.
25:40
SPEAKER_01: How did do you remember how he used it?
25:43
SPEAKER_01: Like how that eventually came out?
25:44
SPEAKER_01: No, no, because I feel like you should get bonus points if they use it in public.
25:49
SPEAKER_01: Like if you get them to say it in front of their parents, or in like you get like a hundred points if they use it during a like a speech or some kind of public address.
25:56
SPEAKER_00: Like oh my gosh, yes.
25:57
SPEAKER_00: I mean, in all fairness, we were in our early, early 20s, 2021.
26:03
SPEAKER_00: So it's not like we had like a full-blown strategy for this game.
26:06
SPEAKER_00: Like, sure, we're basically like, okay, quick, tell me what's the next word.
26:10
SPEAKER_00: Tell a tubbies, cool, let's go for it.
26:12
SPEAKER_00: And then like it would just be even enough to see that light bulb.
26:17
SPEAKER_00: Because at first we're always met with resistance, right?
26:19
SPEAKER_00: We're always met with that's absolutely not you guys, like you know that that's not how it's said, and we're like, okay, fine.
26:26
SPEAKER_00: Like it's it's fine.
26:27
SPEAKER_00: And then we would make sure that when we were talking in a different room, we're saying that word incorrectly.
26:31
SPEAKER_00: Just it like like it, I'm telling you right now that this is this was one this was such a sophisticated, sophisticated, and and so like we were patient with it, you know.
26:43
SPEAKER_00: We would try and and then and then that moment when you see the thought kind of switch to maybe this is how it's said.
26:50
SPEAKER_01: Oh that's the moment I live for.
26:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's wonderful.
26:55
SPEAKER_00: So I mean, I've I've never had uh stripper's genitals anywhere near my face, but I know that I am aware of, and there's certainly no photographs of it, so that that's working in your face.
27:05
SPEAKER_00: Oh no, there's there's not, and there never will be, is what I'm telling you right now.
27:10
SPEAKER_00: But I have been manipulative with the English language, and I am very proud of it.
27:16
SPEAKER_01: I thank you.
27:17
SPEAKER_01: This was what I needed.
27:19
SPEAKER_01: You're welcome.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: You're welcome.
27:20
SPEAKER_00: I can tell that you've absolutely loved this part of the story.
27:25
SPEAKER_00: And you know what?
27:26
SPEAKER_00: It's funny because in that moment in that whole relationship, there's a there was a lot of what is this for after it ended.
27:31
SPEAKER_00: I was like, what is this whole what was this whole mess for in my life?
27:35
SPEAKER_00: And little did I know that when I would be 45, I would get to tell a friend who lives in a different country this story, and it would make his whole life.
27:46
SPEAKER_00: He could die a happy man tonight.
27:48
SPEAKER_01: And we could turn it into content for dozens of other people to listen to.
27:53
SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
27:53
SPEAKER_00: This is what I want our listeners to do.
27:55
SPEAKER_00: I want you to pick a word.
27:56
SPEAKER_00: I want you to pick a word, and I want you to just sneakily shift it a little bit and then just start saying it.
28:03
SPEAKER_00: Just start getting it out there.
28:04
SPEAKER_00: And it's you're gonna you're gonna come across a lot of um lot of pushback at first.
28:08
SPEAKER_00: People are gonna be like, you're dumb, you're illiterate, you don't know how to speak English, and you're just gonna have to push it.
28:14
SPEAKER_01: What do they teach you in Canada?
28:15
SPEAKER_01: Right.
28:15
SPEAKER_01: It's not it's not a real place.
28:17
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like you're gonna get some there's gonna be some fallout from this thing.
28:21
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
28:22
SPEAKER_00: So I'm just saying here that you you gotta keep going.
28:25
SPEAKER_00: Keep going because you don't know if 25 years later you're going to have that mountaintop moment with that experience.
28:33
SPEAKER_00: It's worth it.
28:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm telling you right now, it's worth it.
28:35
SPEAKER_01: And you mispronounced it in other rooms so that you'd overhear it.
28:39
SPEAKER_01: I this is so good.
28:41
SPEAKER_01: You're so good.
28:42
SPEAKER_01: I'm proud of you.
28:44
SPEAKER_01: Um, I'm gonna end it on that as you take as you take a sip of your tea with a made with a good Christian tea bag.
28:51
SPEAKER_01: Um uh folks, thank you so much for joining us on the Reverse Jackass podcast today.
28:56
SPEAKER_01: And it's been a pleasure to be here hosting this podcast for you.
28:59
SPEAKER_01: We love you.
29:00
SPEAKER_01: Um, want to say a special shout out to Bone Guy for his kind uh review of us on the on the website.
29:07
SPEAKER_01: And I just want to say uh Bone Guy, you made my day with that.
29:10
SPEAKER_01: If any others of you wants to make my day, you could post a kind review.
29:14
SPEAKER_01: You could like, subscribe, send us to your friends, do all that stuff.
29:18
SPEAKER_01: Um, or you could write us at reversejackass at gmail.com and tell us about a time that you have misdirected somebody who deserved it.
29:25
SPEAKER_01: Um other than that, I'm Nick.
29:27
SPEAKER_01: With me as always, is Evelyn the Canadian Blade.
29:29
SPEAKER_01: Evelyn, say goodbye to the people.
29:30
SPEAKER_00: See you later, everyone.
29:31
SPEAKER_00: Go get yourself a nice hot cup of tea.
29:34
SPEAKER_00: Some neighbors are besties.
29:36
SPEAKER_01: Others quarrel bitterly.
29:38
SPEAKER_01: Stuck together through geography.
29:42
SPEAKER_01: One of us has nukes, and the other has tokes.
29:46
SPEAKER_00: It's American Canadian diplomacy.
29:50
SPEAKER_00: It's sort of