Latest / Connor with Honor: AI, Real Estate and Real Life / If you are fat, what are you waiting for?

Transcript

If you are fat, what are you waiting for? · Connor with Honor: AI, Real Estate and Real Life

• 0:00
  how much time do you have left there been a lot of posts popping up on my social media that talk about if you are 50 years old and male they also have similar corresponding numbers for females you'll have about 28 more years left then it breaks it down even further and it talks about how many weekends how many months how many weeks how many hours how many minutes and it's a lot to take in that brings me to this particular update where on my podcast I like to talk about the things that I've implemented in my life to facilitate bigger change one of the things happens to be accepting that change is really necessary for me to move to that next step whatever that is I was fat for a long time if you follow me at all most of my life there were some times in there when I was less fat but in essence it was a very tricky time the entire time it wasn't till I finally got a handle on it and realized that I probably don't have as much time as I think and then whenever there's medical verification for that sort of thing then it rings home more true that's when these pauses happen in life these are big traumatic things that create change sometimes we don't have that it's like an alcoholic maybe that never went to jail was never arrested didn't destroy a family or other people by their alcoholism yet they still drink every single day day after day for years and years and years and still never got to that issue where medical intervention was necessary those particular people just realize that this isn't something they want to continue to do so they just stopped and that being the case they never had that low basement level appointment with fate that would have maybe made them change as well your reasons are definitely your own you know as a realtor cop turn realtor and that was quite a while back I have overlapping services with both the LAPD and then being a realtor and my blog if you go to Santa 3 to open houses.com forward slash blog you'll see the articles in the way that I write pretty much as I write as if I'm speaking so I've had comments in the past there is a gentleman that was reading my stuff back in 2008 2009 kind of before blocks or anything more than just publishing how great of a dad you are with your kids miss that one as well but they were using that publishing information that way I was doing that back then about real estate and he said that my blog tended to make his eyes bleed which was again I thought having somebody of his caliber make that kind of a comment was more of a blessing than a curse and it was still then that I did a lot of the lot of the acceptance so LAPD was over 20 years I had some reserve service and there's a level 3 reserve so we're you know pushing 20 21 years and not retired isn't bringing income but retired as far as having a retired ID CCW that sort of thing but as far as the money coming in that was cashed out back at the time when I actually resigned and then signed up to be a reserve so I was I was thinking the other day about some of the stories that I had at my different assignments and they've all been great whether it was teaching for a time at the police academy whether it was teaching motors whether it was being a motor whether it was working deuce watch and patrol and on probation I didn't realize I had so many stories but I think the more I become in touch with well whatever those stories become more prominent I actually recall them better maybe with some embellishment but not a lot but LAPD service was that time over 20 years and then with some Reserve Services Level 3 I did work the motors as I said and talked to other assignments other other different courses LAPD laser and also radar for traffic and IDAP program and all this fun stuff there was a lot of stories also there was a lot of stress but if you were one that could balance it you are golden and in fact if you knew the difference from viewing this life as a game versus an actual life or death simulation it seems like the people that had that attitude were better off in the long run the other ones that took every event and took it personal held it in those were the ones where therapy worked well but you also had the addiction curve coming in and then finally after retirement they had sold all of their life to the job they don't last long they're done you know two three years later and we all know that is being retired we're watching and being I was younger retired but when I go to qualify and I see people every year the stories in the groups are all about who died or who's sick or who's going to die and I know that the people that are listening this my LAPD brother and and sheriffs and chippies you'll get that also military life military carries that same kind of a figure because for some reason people can't not get used to it but people are unable to I guess be quiet and not do anything when you're doing something and then a high energy job where you have pretty much 90% pure adrenaline excuse me 10% pure adrenaline and 90% pure boredom it's hard to hang that up when you're finished because you'll notice after time that you're starting to live for the adrenaline aspect it is really what drives you to decisions now going to this this game versus real simulation I by no means mean so so it's not it's taken so it's not taken out of context I do not mean that we're looking at this as if we get extra lives at the end and we can increase our hit points by power UPS throughout or even using the one of those game codes the Konami code trying to reprogram and I I'm not saying that these people are out there playing Pac Man with people just arbitrary and going through without any consequence what I mean is the biggest thing as somebody that does a good job as a police officer believes in is the value of the human life period end of story so if somebody could be taken to jail if they needed to be arrested after all the officers fulfillment was completed after his entire you know digestion of the information that he has available to him or her and they make a decision to arrest somebody put them in jail that next step is going to be put them in jail it with the least amount of issue possible nobody wants to go to jail jail sucks prison sucks everything like that just it's not a great place to be and even if you have people that have been there a long time while they might not be able to simulate back with the regular people in the world they more than likely would probably rather be out than be in with the police department that is best handled by those people that understand that it's a job it's is a job that Perry carries a very high price tag with it a very substantial price tag in fact so expensive is this price tag that there is no ability to fix it after it's been cashed in there is no more moving forward that is it the biggest pay as a police officer you'll make is by your death that is the largest thing the biggest payment that has to be given or could be given that existed for everybody and still does I don't know how the methodology works today it was as if back in the day and of course we all have those stories about how it was different back then but back then I do know that it was talked about quite a bit and the first and foremost thing we needed to protect was ourselves and then after that everyone else and when it comes down to protecting everyone else there were sacrifices that were made seemingly without a lot of thought almost this unknown unthinking through decisions where our life would then be put in jeopardy and potentially finish as we completed our life at that moment because of our attempting to save somebody else's life or protect somebody from being having their life exhausted or extinguished I don't know if that's still that same mentality today I think it probably is but right when I came on back in the 90s I also recall that there were several people I mean more than half I would say of the people that were there testing with the out of state people that were only there because they were unemployed there wasn't that I wanted to be a cop since I was this age or I grew up wanted to be a cop or my dad and my uncle and my grandpa were cops or we all you know law enforcement was my thing or I was a law enforcement in the military or those sorts of things security in the military whatever it may have been there wasn't a lot of that but the people that I was in the academy with were incredibly intelligent very sharp my classmates we had a couple West Point graduates we had Annapolis in there we had a past Secret Service agent in there you know very smart business people we had the son of a person that owns a boatload of Taco Bells and now I think he owns all the Taco Bells and lots of people people at different stages in life we had people very young like me at 21 we had people older in their late 20s early thirties but of all the people that made it to the end of that academy class there was a very close kinship and while a lot of them are not on the job anymore some of them have died some of them have killed themselves we still have that bond so when I hear those names it does bring me back somewhat looking at these pasts one of the things that I realize and you might be listening this too is time doesn't wait for anyone in fact time continues to move forward no matter where you are in your life you might wanna say that in your life you're completely satisfied and happy and this is that point where you just know it couldn't get any better and if that's you good for you but understand that in life if you have something that's been itching at your crawl that you want to fix and what I talk about is the biggest thing I fix that was really the biggest life changer for me being super fat for super long over 50% fat so over half of me was fat for so long and being able to understand that I needed to get it fixed well of course I knew I needed to get it fixed the entire time I had started and failed many different times and it never started to work out until I did that one critical thing and I did it for a reason you might you might not really think about so the first thing the most important thing that came in my mind was me wanting to in all actuality wanting to forgive myself and it's not so much that I'm forgiving myself because I believe it's going to be good therapy I have been able to forgive myself because I need to move to that next evolution that next step while you're holding on to this guilt and this anger you're not gonna have any kind of a diet or eating plan or fat torching session workout for you at all it might work for a little bit I mean you can mask all this BS for a little while but sooner or later it's gonna creep back in so when I forgave myself it wasn't that I didn't need you know years of therapy and all of this other external help and these groups and these help things and and drugs and medications and it's not that I didn't need it I just realizes I I don't have time to to wait for that part to be fulfilled before I change something that literally was and is and had been killing me and that was the fat so I get it when people say you need therapy to deal with that you need to go talk to somebody that has their degree in this particular discipline to be able to help you through it or talk to this person that's had these experiences I get all of that but if you're sitting there fat and you have visceral fat choking out your internal organs and you have some addiction issue with food and then that's translating into addiction issues with alcohol and other things you might not have as much time as you think to start fixing everything and you're definitely not gonna have as much time it's gonna take to get you over your past if you're one of those people that continues to hold on to it not letting go for it keeps you warm in some way you know life people say life life is unfair sure I think so I think life can be unfair I think that life is absolutely as fair as it's going to be and when I say that that's what I say about people I trust people are going to do what that person's going to do I trust that so I accept it even if it's bad even if it's screwing me over taking advantage of me supporting me helping me loving me cheating whatever the whatever it is I trust that they are going to do what they're going to do and that has helped me move past a lot of these little things and these are just Band Aids but I think that biggest epiphany for me having talked it out and recorded podcasts and videos and done the blog and try to explain things I think my biggest aha is going to be the fact that my forgiveness isn't because of some manipulation that I have gone through in order to have everything fixed it's the same thing as falling back on waiting for the right time to take the vacation or the right time to take the trip or the right time to go see those people you love that you left so long ago it's about that but you never do right you never have the right time what happens when you go on vacation your phone starts blowing up you can be in commission based sales like real estate and it can be slow and you can say you know what I'm gonna go ahead and get out there and I'm gonna do it take care of it when I get back but we're gonna go on vacation come hell or high water we're getting out of here for two weeks and that's just the way it is and I tell you if you finally get up the the understanding that there is no best time once you leave that phone starts ringing off the hook and you're like where was all the business while I was preparing for the vacation you have that side of it you have the other side of it where realizing that you might not be able to wait until you've gone through years of therapy because right now you're toying with yourself No. 1 if you've attempted in the past if you've practiced at dropping fat and maybe you can maybe you can't maybe you never were good at it maybe you had some periods in your life where you were less fat great but overall you still haven't fixed it so what is that look like and then that question is why are you fat what's the reason you're fat are you eating more than you should be probably yes and then if you're eating more than you should be what's the point of that because you know the answer how do you stop eating more than you should be besides just stopping eating more than you should be and then you have all these other complicated measures regarding torching body fat and in my case and again you have to do what's best for you have to talk to your doctor you have to get medical advice in my case the best thing that ever happened was not eating not eating for longer periods of time and then when I did eat eating breakfast that's that break fast breakfast you see the two words there break and fast breakfast that's the meal that breaks the fast of course when people say breakfast you think well it's first thing in the morning that's that's that first meal of the day correct but timing doesn't matter it is the first meal of the day for sure because you broken your fast it's the next meal and that's where breakfast is so if you are going to embark on the fasting thing like I did after you talk to your doctor and all those other medical people if you're gonna decide to do that then it's Paramount that you keep a handle on the refeed you keep a handle on that time you are going to pick up the spoon or the fork and break the fast by eating breakfast get a handle on it folks it will get away from you and if you're a food addict if you're eating because of problems in your past if you're eating because of problems now if you're eating because you can't get over certain things and they plague you then it's gonna come back unless you embrace and forgive yourself for screwing it up it's always when we're hard on ourselves yeah you see Superman sitting on the curb and I read this somewhere years ago you see Superman sitting on the curb insert name of your favorite superhero and they're there they're sitting on curb and and they're depressed man they're just leaned over they're hunched over and you're coming up and you're looking at him you're like oh my God is there is there something I can do you know just to help so what are you gonna do of course hey hey Superman how you doing you don't know me it's Connor I I you're my favorite of all time can I help you I mean you would you would take a moment sit down and have Superman explain to you his woes so you could try to help guaranteed why are we so hard on ourselves why are we not embracing ourselves with even more care and compassion why well I think I think we've all been brought into a world where we don't we don't care about ourselves and realistically the caring for yourself really is where your ability to care for others begins that's No. 1 if you don't care for you you really can't care for anybody else and I do know that by time and that's where I've seen my life come now making a men's fixing that if I'm super fat and have visceral fat and my fat is literally choking my organs from the inside out and then when it starts to appear a subcutaneous fat big belly you know tricep hangings you know what do they say these horrible CLA cra but you know these these arms that you see by people in the food industry those massive you know all of that fat the thigh fat if you have that you might not be able to go make amends to everybody that maybe caused it or maybe were in your mind responsible where you may be accused them or too hard on them because if you failed if you've not moved the ball forward by all of your attempts in the past to diet you're probably gonna have a few pissed off people around you especially if you happen to adopt some advice about what I did of course everything any changes you would definitely wanna talk to your doctor about because they know you much more intimately than me this is work with me but so you see these things realizing that if Connor doesn't have time to go make amends with everybody he's scarred by his multiple attempts at trying to get body fat off for years and years and years and years how's this next time gonna be different and that's something you're gonna have to face you're gonna have to own it and you're gonna have to walk through it because you're gonna have some people that are gonna be absolutely critical of you and of course you can tell him yes this time is gonna be different I promise this is really gonna be just fantastic we're gonna I'm gonna get this all done and you're gonna see and they've heard all this before there's nothing different of course they're gonna see they're gonna watch and you are going to probably in their mind continue on that same path you were before you're gonna do it pretty good for a few days maybe a week maybe two weeks there's gonna be accolades everybody's gonna tell you how great you're doing and all of that's also a problem so I'll end with not to tell anybody what you're about to do not trying to keep it a secret of course you tell your medical professional and then maybe go off their guidance but I'll tell you why I didn't tell anybody and then you have all these people that are you know gunning for you and then you have an event or birthday party or I don't know you you go back on autopilot for a moment where you're in a drive through all of a sudden and you're buying those 15 tacos or you're at some restaurant filling the blank and you're buying a half gallon of ice cream or I mean you're you're right at this moment you're on autopilot because that's how it's been for you in the past every time you go and you gorge yourself which is at least once a day in most cases once you get into that world it's really hard to pull out it's hard to get up to the window after ordering all that food and either saying I've changed my mind and driving away really quickly but if you look like me they're probably gonna remember cause I don't look I look a little anyway so it's not that's not a good thing for me or you get up to the window and you pay just like you were gonna eat it and then you go to the first trash can and dump it out good luck making it there but these are good practice sessions too but you've done this you've tried this so you have these people around you and what I was gonna say about not telling anyone is somewhat important because I'm gonna do such and such I go tell a friend if I had any and then the friends are gonna tell me well that's great Connor congratulations that's gonna be fantastic by the time I get done hearing all the congratulations and great job and we're so impressed that you're gonna move forward with this gonna be great at it whatever it is or it's gonna be great whatever the product would be well Connor has already fulfilled it meaning Connor mentally dopamine wise stimulation wise has already done the whole deal so what the hell why would Connor wanna move forward with that now the things I don't say anything to anyone about the things I keep most secret the things that I don't let out until it's completely finished that's the win those are the things that work because they get carried all the way to finish in your life you may have things like this as well dieting if you have enablers if you have people around you if you have people you do things with that surround the food that you over indulge in thereby if you have eating partners like crime partners but I have eating partners these are relationships that are going to have to be nullified if you going to expect to move forward if you have somebody that is feeding you and has been feeding you for years to tell them that you're not gonna eat for a couple weeks if that's you know where you get your mind right that's gonna drive them crazy what are they gonna do complete canasta with you feeding somebody carries so much power you are giving this person's substance so the person that is being enabled the person that has been now your feeder for all this time you're about to take all of their power away and that's gonna create an issue so when you're ready if you're ready if you've talked to your doctor and they say yeah it would probably be good for you to drop some weight and then you say well what about some fasting and and they're gonna say well you know it's kind of the same as cloric restriction and you know it's gonna be about the same as this and you might lose muscle mass just just do your own research look into all of this stuff all of all of the things where I had tried cloric restriction for many many years I had done the weight loss pills try the ozempek and those sorts of things for a very short time after I had already dropped a bunch of the weight via fasting and that wasn't great either because even me I started noticing my loss wasn't fat I was losing more muscle with that than when I was not eating and just lifting weights carrying that through even for the two weeks that I completely water fasted I had noticed that I I lost no lean mass as far as I could tell and because I'm each each time my body needs food I have an overabundance of fat to burn and contained in fat and a lot of the other cells in the body that your body starts to eat and digest when you go into a longer fast it's called atopha G what it ended up happening is I was able to have a full 24 hours of the most perfect meal being fed to me off of my stored body fan ask your doctor if that's the way it works in you as well then maybe that's something you want to explore but make sure you get their permission but when I started that three and four days in the hunger pains were gone but I just didn't start with this I had practice fasting for a long time and it literally took me a hard learner months to get to the mindset of where I was now going to not eat and when I'm gonna start eating again I'm gonna start eating something more on the ketogenic diet type realm staying away from carbohydrates and the sugars sugars as as carbohydrates but pretty much just watching total carbohydrate content whether it's coming from sugar or starches still not having much of any if at all because as far as the impact on my system what I've noticed is in both cases the starches and also the sugars tend to make me eat more than I normally would and that's just in my body maybe you have similar experiences but either way you definitely wanna talk to your doctor I'm gonna quit harping on that but that's important medical professional advice finding out that after time I actually started to see that the fasting worked and once I got that refeed schedule correct where whatever food I ate was not going to be you know laden with carbohydrates or even processed much besides you know from the field into the into the butchers area where they kill and cut up the animal and onto the table or on into this grocery store so very little modification retouching by human hands not like taking corn and turning it into something that I've never seen before that's total manipulation and changing of the food if you're looking to eat what I found was cause people ask this too you know what did you eat and I still eat this way I stay away from the carbohydrates and I try to stay away from stuff in packages so very clearly meat eggs fish so meat's gonna be your beef your chicken your Turkey and then your fish all kinds of fish the um shellfish and stuff it never bothered me do your own research but ate that as well and then all of the vegetables and seasonal fruits so that's it some eggs meat and eggs were great whatever eggs it doesn't matter what type you know boiled fried they were all fantastic as well they got great protein content very negligible carb content but they have great protein content they're full of fantastic vitamins for you as well as is the other food that I was eating so it was meat and as long as I stick to that I'm good once I try to go outside the lines and plus I gave up alcohol that was a whole another that's a whole another huge series alcohol was really a big problem because of the delay that it imposed as you're trying to let you know so you get all that other stuff dialed in right so you get the diet down you're like okay I can do this and then you do that forgiving yourself thing that I was talking about so when you screw it up you get right back on track I mean right immediately you know that that first bite of that donut or half a box of donuts or the case of ice cream whatever it is once you kind of come to your senses stop it's done you you've done it it's over would have been better if you didn't but it's too late we're not gonna go and do that again we're not gonna rehash the whole thing start again immediately once I had my mind wrapped around that then it just came off then then I was able to continue on these paths for a very long time with the fasting and I was able to move forward and then I had less and less incidents of messing it up but in the past if I wouldn't have forgave myself this is how that trajectory would have went oh my god I just screwed up oh I can't believe it this is this is oh now you know what I might as well you know what I'm not ready this this isn't you know I deserve it I did so good you know I'll start again Monday and here we are Friday I screwed up Friday so now we got Friday we got Saturday we got Sunday and then we're starting again Monday you know how much damage I can do just with food in three days and back at that time talking about balancing the alcohol then you have the alcohol on top of it so well I'll only drink the the yeah the vodkas and the tequilas and the whiskies but nothing sweet nothing that has carbohydrate content sugar and yeah that I've done that that doesn't work that's you're still pausing everything when you drink and beer you know throw beer and IPS and all that fancy stuff throw some extra levels of nonsense on top of that besides the clear alcohols and you have even more of a metabolic mess that's created when that's ingested wine there's no there's no good in any of that but you can still torch off quite a bit while in vibing again it's just if you're not eating anything and you're doing that that creates other problems so don't do that the thing is this if this is something that appeals to you that forgiving yourself thing at least for that moment it works good as far as making a men's all recap great if you wanna go tell everybody you're really sorry for how you treated them that's wonderful but I don't believe that self forgiveness is a concept that needs to be heated I believe that whatever drama you're dealing from the past if you can't get rid of it because of things and slides that have done against you then that's gonna have to be something that you can deal with in time but for you to wait until you fix all of that baggage you might not have that much time so I don't know where you are in your life you're 26 I mean if we go by the charts you got some time 76 probably not as much time but things change right we're seeing medical advancements we're seeing prescription weight loss medication come out there you know they're talking about weight loss it's fat loss you want to keep as much muscle as you can and get rid of as much fat as you can that's that's what it is you want to lose the right weight and that should be fat if don't get hung up on oh my God if I start and I've worked so hard on muscle mass I'm gonna lose muscle mass as long as you keep working out you're gonna be fine just continue to do that but get started don't wait till the timing's correct don't wait until it's it's really going to work because you're not gonna know if it's going to work I can't tell you why that last time worked where I got on this path and didn't stop except it came out of trauma it came out of an event that I wouldn't wish on anyone it was painful but the alcohol I didn't need such an event so we all are susceptible to our own mantra to the words we say to ourselves if you're gonna be self hypocritical of you not forgiving you as if you would forgive your favorite superhero you're gonna have to move through it you're gonna have to start that's it it's very plain and simple we have a lot of choices you can stand your same trajectory thinking that it's really easier where you are than trying to go through this transfer transformative journey transformation well yeah we all wanna transfer we all wanna change into something different and maybe you do too there are times when I I still can't believe I've gotten here and I can't believe I'm still on the journey and then I realized that it wasn't it it was never goal oriented because I'll never be I'll always have a challenge that I place in front of me if I'm a particular weight and size now my shoulders look a certain way my biceps look a certain way I want to not eat as much of this I mean there's a time when you know I was binging on nuts well nuts are very caloric dense sure they're definitely better than a Snickers bar and I'm not talking about peanuts I'm talking about pecans and almonds and macadamia nuts and walnuts some of the highest fiber uh nuts that there are there but you know a handful's pretty dense so if you're eating a couple bowls you can you know have two 3,000 calories that on top of your regular protein and rich meal you're gonna start putting on weight because well even at one meal a day with all that volume your stomach's got to work on it and once it does it's gonna store what you don't use away now of course it's probably more ketogenic than not but even with those nuts you'll see that there are carbohydrates contained in them and it's probably not a good thing and what that does if I'm eating a bowl of nuts that's indicative of me being a bingeer as I was in the past binging on food and overdoing it and eating too much volume because of some past trauma potentially or some habit that I had to break so I see little things like that those things they sneak in they start to come in and then I have to pull back a little bit cause I'm constantly analyzing what I'm doing you know it sounds exhausting but it really isn't because you're basically your own experiment and that's how I look at myself you know what if I tweak this what if I do this for a little while and it actually worked out for me to be the best way for me to operate because it's able it's made me able to understand that while time is a very limited resource we have the ability to manipulate it within our own minds our own brains our own systems I understand that I don't have as much time as I used to via medical advice or medical knowledge whatever it is but that also is up in the air so nobody really knows how long I've know people that have been diagnosed with terminal disease that have lasted past their biological biologically assigned age 78 in men and I guess 76 in women if I if memory serves I might be wrong on that but they've been told that you know you got two weeks to live you got three weeks you got a month you got three years you got two years and they've moved past all these areas if that's you it sure would still be better your current lot of fat it would still be better to go into that journey your death process being in being less fat because less fat especially when you're cutting off a lot of the weight that difference is really night and day just getting out of bed just lifting your legs taking a shower washing between your legs I mean just it's a very different thing when you're struggling to reach and then when you get direct access because you've torched off over 100 pounds of fat this will help I hope you're well thanks for listening this is Connor Mcgyver we will talk to you on the next one you can find me at Santa Clarita openhouses com and there I have well shows like this and all of the others thanks for watching and listening and we will talk to you soon be well