Latest / The Liftoff Experience Podcast / From a Near-Death Experience to Surviving Abuse: Destinee Suman’s Story

Transcript

From a Near-Death Experience to Surviving Abuse: Destinee Suman’s Story · The Liftoff Experience Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_03: It was the first words I said.
• 0:01
  SPEAKER_03: I said, I just died.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_03: I go unconscious and veer off a road.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_03: There's one guy that kept running out to the road to call 911 again because nobody was coming and I was dying.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_03: I I went in and out of my body at least six times that I can remember.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_03: I could see and hear everything.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_03: I could hear them working on my body.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_03: And then right in front of me as I arrived was my great-grandma.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_03: And she basically says, What are you doing here?
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_03: She had passed away about five years before in Earth terms.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_03: And I think at 24, if I could summarize what my death taught me, it was how to live and how important it is to live.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: So Friday afternoon, just getting some red Zen T shameless plug.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: Check out some chocolate hazelnut Puer.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: This is definitely, and we have a refill here, so we'll stay nice and hydrated through our show today.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_03: It's my favorite, and it's so much better when they make it.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_00: So you know, it's like um when your mom or dad or you know makes you a peanut butter and jelly or something.
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, man, why is the sandwich that you make me so much better than what I make, you know?
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: But um I'm super excited to have you on the show.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: I know we've had this in the works for like months now.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um for the viewers and listeners, frame of reference.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: So you met Melissa and you all came together and have done some different modalities.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: All you girls have your own chat.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: And um, you and your husband, and we're gonna get her husband on later, just have an amazing story.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna start with your story first, and you'll have to stay tuned uh for the next story.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_00: And it's amazing where you've come to be where you're at to serve those who you once were.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: I love that saying.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: We're here to serve those who we once were.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_00: And you've had some frame of reference, y'all.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: Corporate America, uh near death experiences, wake up opportunities to see things in a way that she's never seen before, to meet her life partner who has gifts that we will talk about a little bit later.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but welcome to Lift Off Experience.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: I'm super excited to go deep in today's story.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, thank you so much for having me.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_03: Um I this is a story that I've been telling for a while and uh just excited to be here and talk about it.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_03: As you said, I'm a 25-year uh corporate executive and healthcare tech, and this isn't always things that we talk about as as executives.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_00: You don't you don't talk about that at healthcare?
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_03: No, and it's funny because you know, life and death is such a part of healthcare.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_03: So you would think we'd talk about it.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: What sector in healthcare are you in?
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um, right now I'm in like the surgery side, surgery tech for you know, suppliers and surgeons.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and that could be for anything, could be like uh, you know, amputation, uh emergency cases to cancer or removing things.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_03: So you just apply them with basically our tech manages uh any device that's put inside you and how that whole billing process works on the back end.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_03: Oh wow.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um, because it's very unique.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_03: That's the one thing that doesn't get pre-insured and pre-billed.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's because we put that device inside you and it could be a quarter of an inch off, or maybe you have 10 stitches versus 30.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_03: And so that's all billed after, and we manage that whole side of the billing and making sure a supplier and a health system get paid.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I gotta say that there's was that a multi-billion dollar organization, a trillion dollar organization, I can only imagine.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: And so 25 years into that, and let's go back into your story from the beginning.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: So before you got into healthcare and then met your husband and all that type of stuff.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_00: So let's go back into just like brothers, sisters, upbringing, like family, you know, how are you raised?
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I mean, when when you hear her story later on, you're gonna be like, what?
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_00: So, and and and her gifts and her husband's gifts.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: So you're gonna have to stay tuned for that later on the show.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: So let's go back to the beginning.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: So wherever you want to start.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_00: Um floor's yours.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm a four-generation, five-generation Arizonan on both sides.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_03: We were originally settlers, um, cattle ranchers, farmers.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_03: What?
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_03: And um, we still have like our original log cabin from the 1800s in northern Arizona.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_03: So where is this exactly?
• 4:35
  SPEAKER_03: Um, that would be in Springerville, Eager, Arizona, and that's actually where I was born.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, that's super cool.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, all right.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: And then you just decided to never leave, you just want to stay here.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_03: Well, uh I know you I know you explored.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I always thought I was gonna leave.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_03: You know, I'm a big travel junkie, yeah.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but there's something about this desert that just brings me home.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and maybe it is that ancestral tie to the land, but I've gone other places, I've lived somewhere for like a year, and Arizona always brought me back here besides my kids and all that.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: So I love that.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: So uh siblings?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so we I grew up in a um Mormon settler family.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, okay.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_03: Um uh so we were, as I said, cattle ranchers, uh, very strict uh fundamental family.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_03: I'm one of six kids.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_03: My mom's one of nine kids.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_03: Oh uh just a really big family.
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm the second oldest daughter in that line of kids.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_03: There's four boys, two girls.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_03: And we moved down to kind of the Phoenix area when I was about five.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_03: And uh even then we bought land and I milked cows and everything, raised chickens and all that, all that before it was cool, um, right before high school.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_03: And I'd go to a normal public school and milk my cows at night.
• 5:48
  SPEAKER_03: So uh it was it was a very good childhood, like it was safe.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_03: It we never locked our doors.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you know, we we grew up on the land and it was a really fun way to grow up.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: That's super cool.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_00: No, I I I feel the same.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: It was 2020, actually before 2020.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: This was probably 2005, 2006, coming out here with a friend of mine.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: And when I first came out, I was just like had an automatic connection, and uh, I've only been here for six years, so uh about the five-year generation, but uh coming out here, I felt like this energy and it felt good and it felt right, and it was interesting because fast forward after move my friend here, and it was funny.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: Like, my mom knew she's like, I knew you were gonna move out there.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't know, and then like I actually met my wife Melissa, who's Red Zen T Melissa Salzar, she's been on the show as well if you want to see her show um in California.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: And then we decided to come here.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: It was funny, her mom was already out here, so it was almost like destiny.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, Hey, we got we got a one-year-old and your mom's out here, we got daycare.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: I said, What do you think?
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: And then going from Hayward to here, and I showed her Zillow and I showed her the listings and saw what we can buy.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_00: She was like, Wow, okay, yep, no-brainer, let's go.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_00: So I I relate to you in the fact that like there is something about the energy here, and even when I travel places, I feel like I want to come back.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I don't want to give this plug because I don't want everyone to move to Arizona, but I do feel like it's a best uh kept secret in the fact that in the summer, when it's our hottest, yeah, the flights are the cheapest.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_03: So we can fly anywhere.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_03: I can be in Chicago for the summer and not have to be in Arizona because nobody's flying here.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_03: So flights are cheaper for us, and then we have nine months of the best weather ever.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_03: So that's also a good reason.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_00: If you didn't know, now you know.
• 7:31
  unknown: Don't come.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, don't come.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely not.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: No, and I love it.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: The monsoon, the rains, it's so sick.
• 7:37
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, oh, dude, this is so cool.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like all of suddenly it's summertime, this monsoon, it rains and it cools off, and then it gets better.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, wow.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, people don't realize August is such a beautiful month when we have our monsoons.
• 7:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it's so cool.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: So, so you have your brothers and sisters working on the ranch coming to Central Phoenix.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: And so then the family all came together.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: You guys bought a house out here, or just you or some land out here.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_03: Um, my parents did, and kind of got a little mini farm in in Mesa, Arizona.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_03: And that's where I went to high school.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_03: And um shortly after high school, I went and moved to China for about a year and taught English and all that.
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and when I came back, uh very quickly I was pregnant and getting married.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_02: And um thank you.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_03: Of course, a wild journey, but um, I really struggled with the boundaries of the religion I was grown up under.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_03: So as soon as I could maybe stretch my wings, I was always pushing those boundaries a little bit.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_03: And uh, you know, I I was a mom by 21 and um a divorced mom with two kids by 23.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_03: And I think that really was formidable for me because as I broke out of maybe those those early rules and foundations, I had to find my own.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_03: And that came with trials and tribulations, yeah, um, but also blessings.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and yeah, so you know, my early years, you know, up until uh 23-24 were quite quite busy and loud from 17 to 24 was pretty intense.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to go a little deeper because I'm curious personally, and I know that you know everything we're talking about, we want to be open and have an open mind, also for the audience as well.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_00: Uh no past judgments at the end of the day, just want to explore, you know, what things mean to different individuals so everyone can make their own decision and whatever that decision is for them.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_00: So being at that you are a Mormon, I know that there's different types of things that are acceptable that are not acceptable.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: At what age did you ever feel like maybe, I don't know, like I don't want to say the word it's not right for you, or anything like that, but just something from the perspective of like maybe there's something else more for you outside of this specific way of living and being.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because I do believe, and this is just my personal opinion, I think that everyone comes into this world the way they come into this world, and a mother and a father can choose whatever they want to choose and and at least introduce it to their children.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like for me as a father, I'm gonna let Jordan do whatever she's gonna do.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: That's her right, and she can do that, and it's totally fine for her, just because I feel like it's I'm no one to tell her what she should have to do from my perspective.
• 10:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and that's subject to the eyes of the beholder.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_03: That's us Gen X or millennials.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_03: We just can't handle that.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it's like we have to run it.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_00: Millennial all the way over here.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm right there with you.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: So so for you, did you did you feel something at a younger age that maybe you were thinking about exploring or looking at other things, or what came up for you?
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think it it's actually pertinent to this later story, but it's taken a lot of reflection to see this.
• 10:42
  SPEAKER_03: But I've had an inner knowing, um, and I call that my yes-no uh in me that's been pretty loud from from childhood.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_03: And and um I had a near-drowning experience at one year old.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_03: One I've often wondered, yeah, I I drown in a horsing trough, a little horse trough.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: And the parents, your parents were there?
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: What I mean.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_03: Well, so the a little side story.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_03: My um my I would go outside every day and be with the horses and cows.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_03: As soon as I could be outside, no shoes on, no clothes on, my mom said I was out.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_03: Like, and this is me being free, 18 months old.
• 11:17
  SPEAKER_03: So she named her destiny.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what she wanted out of me, but she got that free spirit.
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_03: So second daughter.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but me and my uh my sister was about three, I was one, and my mom said she was in the house, and um, we had a cow, a Jersey cow.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: Her name's Hannah.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: She's my favorite.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um, she was my first pet, and my first love was this big Jersey cow.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_03: And she would follow me everywhere.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_03: She loved me and just would nudge me along in the field.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_03: And my mom said something in her just said, go check on the girls.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_03: And she probably got that like one or two times that was like go check.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_03: She was sewing inside, and she got that little mother go check on the girls.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_03: And she's like, Why?
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Nothing should be out there.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_03: That she knew actually the drinker shouldn't be full because there were days we filled it and days we didn't.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: And so there was like nothing in her that thought something was wrong, and then she kind of heard the cow make a like urgent move.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_03: You know, you get to know your dogs and cats and cows and animals are so magistic.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, my mom was inside and she said she looked out the window long enough to see my feet in the drinker just kicking, and then they stopped.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_03: And she ran out and pulled me out.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_03: And my grandpa had come by earlier and filled the drinker and she didn't know.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so it stopped.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_03: Luckily, she said she never had to do um CPR, she had to get the water out of me, but it wasn't full CPR, and um, I kind of you know came too, but she watched my legs stop in the drinker.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_03: All that to say, I've now wondered as I tell this future story if that knowing came from that or I was born with a knowing.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but to answer your question about religion, I at eight years old you get married baptized in the Mormon church, married.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_03: May happen in some of fractions of the religion, but not the one I was raised in.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_03: Um so you're baptized.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_03: And I I did ask my mom, is this something I have to do?
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: And at eight years old.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_03: And the next weekend I was baptized.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_03: And um by 13, I had asked my mom what is the minimum viable requirements for me to attend church and go to seminary and go to youth activities, and your whole world in that religion, every day of your life is an activity within the church.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_03: And so there's not a lot of space for other things.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_03: And so I asked her what that minimum thing was.
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_03: She told me, and I lived that out till I was 17 and moved out.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_02: Oh wow.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_03: And um, I was very rebellious from as I said, 17 to 23 when I was going through my divorce and pregnant with my son.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_03: And my mom said to me, you know, Destiny, you've been rebelling against this thing your whole life.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_03: What do you think about giving it a shot?
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_03: Because your life from the outside looks a little precarious.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_03: You think if you maybe tried this out, it would work.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_03: And maybe funny, good news is I was pregnant, so I wasn't drinking or doing anything outside the rules.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um, the men weren't dating me at the time.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_03: And so uh it was a perfect time for me to like align to what was needed of me from that perspective.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_03: And I spent about six months reading everything I could, diving into it as an adult, giving it everything.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_03: And I went through their temple, did their whole ceremony, attended my grandma's uh she was getting married to somebody, and then um went to a friend's wedding, and this was all within a month, and then went to my mom and said, Thank you for this opportunity, thank you for really pushing me to know for myself.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_03: But my knowing is saying no.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_03: My knowing is saying, Wow, this isn't for me, and thank you for helping me know that.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: I think that that's uh very noble of you to give it that opportunity to see if there was something deeper for you.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: I think that having an open mind for anything is how you can do anything in life, just being open to the possibility of what is possible.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_00: And uh it's amazing at eight years old, you're already questioning like what things look like for you.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um I was always that why kid.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_03: I had to know the why of how everything worked, and even now my family is still very much involved um actively in the religion, and it is I I am so grateful for the way I grew up, and I'm so grateful, like it was such a safe little environment for somebody with this knowing to push those boundaries on.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like it was it would have been scary otherwise to have open.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: Your story reminds me of uh my stepmom Lisa used to always watch a little house on the prairie.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that's me.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: And like that, that is the first thing that popped in my mind, and I'm like, oh my god, little house on the prairie.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: Which is like it's cool because you had that experience you got to experience and see that.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't even know anything about like the whole Mormonism, what that was like.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: So we moved to this neighborhood, and I was like, oh, so you're Mormon.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, you're a Mormon.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: We didn't know, I you know, I don't care, I have any judgments.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: And so we actually had um uh so just across the street, they sold their house and they adopted a Russian child who now um I think she's like what is she like 27, 28, something like that.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: And so we actually had their child stay with us for last summer.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: And so she's a singer, they're traveling abroad, whatever the case may be, they're gonna get a new house being built.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: And uh she's somewhat disabled, Anna.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: And so we lived with her.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: And it was so cool because we got to learn a little bit more about how things work and what have you.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and we we do shows here, car shows, and the new neighbors that moved into their house are also Mormon as well.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: And so we had the kids come over and the dad and they swam and they're you know touch and go.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but of course, Jordan doesn't really play with the children that much or anything like that because you know, of course, they want to keep things the way that they keep things and they have their, I hate to say SOP's KPIs, but that's kind of what it is, you know.
• 17:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like I really, until high school, didn't realize that all my friends were the people I went to church with.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_03: I I didn't have that like big thing.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_03: Why would you?
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_03: And yes, the kids that weren't us were not us.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah as kids, and you think about childhood development, it makes sense that that's really hard.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_03: I also raised my kids in Mesa, Arizona, uh, not LDS, and it was a very hard thing to navigate, uh, even though I I I'm in people.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_03: There's a a woman's calling in the Mormon church, which is called the Relief Society president, and I believe they've changed that term a little bit now.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_03: But that is the person over all the women in your neighborhood.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_03: You have a baby, you need compassionate service of some kind, we'll come in and serve you.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_03: Interesting.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: And um all of my friends that I grew up with that are still Mormon call me the Relief Society president of the non-Mormons.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_03: So I get to I get to still carry all those elements and things that were truly the most beautiful part of what I loved about it, yeah, and and take it and carry it on in my life.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_03: So um, yeah, there's the it uh so many of my best friends and family are still very much a part of the faith.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_03: And they've all I was the first one that they knew that left.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_03: I was the first one that kind of made that call.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_03: And those are it's not always easy, but I think when you learn to listen to those yes nos, you don't have a choice and you're guided by it.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_03: And this was one of those times I can look back and say, wow, you broke a mold listening to the like yes no in your body, and it was such a no in your body that you didn't have to question why or what, you were gonna step out knowing that it was a no, and that that's what was valuable.
• 19:05
  SPEAKER_00: Well, first off, thank you.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for taking the opportunity to be on camera, share your story, be open publicly about this.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: You're the second person we found on the show who's done exactly what you've done.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, shout out to Casey.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_00: Uh she she does different modalities, and she is more in the Reiki community and what have you.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: And uh she's a medium, and her son's a medium as well.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and they're also part of LDS.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: And so I appreciate you taking that opportunity to share that because I know that it's uh it's one thing to to break away and do something in private and then to then be public about it and share it with other people.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that there's something to be said about the contrast from not just from the perspective of religion, but the perspective of everything in life.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: When you think about from the perspective of what we do and how we do it, if we don't challenge or ask questions, then there is no difference because then you're not looking for the contrast of what could be or what is outside of what you are subject to since birth.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that what you're saying, and I just want to say this for the viewers and listeners to go a little bit deeper in the subject, and we don't have to go deeper together, but y'all could explore this on your own, is to explore like what you just said just now for your community in the LDS.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: Look at that in other communities that you were all involved in, even the social and economical time from the perspective of the powers of be within the construct of the reality that we are subject to within the government's whatever, because we don't know anything else.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, we were born and we were told and we obeyed.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_00: And and this is what I'll leave everyone with.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: My daughter this week says, I'm not motivated to get up on the weekdays, I'm motivated to get up on the weekends, and she's been getting up at like 7:30 on the weekends.
• 20:51
  SPEAKER_00: She gets up at 6, sometimes 6.30, sometimes 7.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then we can't even sleep in.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_00: And it's sad that I'm watching my daughter be subject to and be now.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: Today was the first day we set an alarm for her, and I don't even use an alarm.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't like the idea of indoctrinating my children to do something that they don't feel called to do because it's out of alignment for an eight-year-old because she's just not happy.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: And to me, it's like, dude, that's not okay.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: Like the school systems need reform, things need to be looked at from a different perspective to say how do we empower our children so they can feel inspired to go to school just like they are inspired for the weekend.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I see the programming and I see what's happening.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: So take that for what it is, and I'll leave that there because this is about you.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_03: No, I love that.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_03: I'll just tell you, I tell my employees all the time the secret of happiness is loving Mondays as much as you do Fridays.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: That's why we pay that's why we pay our staff on Mondays.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: We pay them on Mondays.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_00: I say, you know what?
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I'm not paying you on Fridays because you're already excited about Friday.
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm gonna pay you on a Monday because a Monday is the beginning of a new week.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_00: And then we do Monday motivation, so you look forward to.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Money motivation, they look forward to their paycheck, and then we set things up differently for them.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not the same type of process that they're used to from the perspective and that I yeah, the whole liftoff and what I'm doing with that, I I want to yeah, not innovate just in industry, but also the corporate structure and model because I just don't believe the way it's been for so long.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_03: It's just you just don't like all these rules and boundaries either.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm so with you on so many other levels from a larger social economic.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: So when you think about the liftoff experience and you think about the biggest show that I can compare it to is Joe Rogan.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't like to call this a podcast, I call this an experience.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: And so my intention is to make this be the catalyst to human evolution from the perspective of a casual conversation so people can make their own decisions on whatever they want to resonate with.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_00: And this isn't to indoctrinate or tell anyone anything, and I'm not selling shirts, I'm not, you don't have to subscribe.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: I have nothing.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_00: I take my my team, my staff, I have a full-scale video team, and they edit this, they produce this.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, lift off agent, and they produce everything for free.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_00: And and so, and so that's why when Melissa met you and the girls, and I was like, okay, we need let's and I want this to be an organic process too, and it's just a casual Friday conversation, just having a good old time.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_03: I love it.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_03: It feels good.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_03: Good.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I and I appreciate that because this is just my truth.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_03: This isn't anyone else's, this isn't for anyone else.
• 23:22
  SPEAKER_03: Nobody can live your life and your experiences and have your truth.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_03: And I just challenge everybody to listen to that yes-no inside them.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_03: Don't even listen to me.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_03: Don't listen to a word I said and don't do anything I say, yeah, and don't do anything anyone else says.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_03: Correct.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: So correct.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_03: I'm included in that.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, this show is not here to support anyone leave the LDS community, period.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: This is not this is not the intention.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_00: This is the intention is to understand your story and what resonates with you.
• 23:46
  SPEAKER_00: Because I think that's the biggest thing is is that like we need more people to be empowered to think for themselves and and to really listen to their inner knowing because as soon as they hear it, and y'all could, you know, comment below or or or you know, ask yourself this question if you've ever done something or not done something, but felt like you should have done the thing that you didn't do and then regretted it.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_03: You know, it's like that sometimes do you feel like I shouldn't do it, I shouldn't do it.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_03: And sure enough, everything played out.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_03: And um, you know, that is the best way that I've learned through life is sticking my hand on the burner, even though it said no and going, You're right, that burned.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's just hot.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, thanks for thanks for reminding me.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for sure.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: So let's go, let's continue the story.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: So you all are uh now out here.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you go through the process of eight years old asking questions up to 17.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: You follow the SOPs and KPI standard operating and uh key performance indicator.
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_00: And then now you say, All right, I'm going in this other direction.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_00: Now, did you approach your family and say, hey, I'm I I'm I didn't especially with my mom and dad because it was an ask of them.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_03: And and I can't tell you my parents' love.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_03: It is so immense.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_03: And I know that they raised me in this because it is their path to happiness, and it is they love me so much they want me to be as happy as they are for this.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_03: And so sitting down as a 23-year-old adult and trying to have that conversation with I know this came from love, and I need you guys to like know I'm gonna be okay, and I'm still gonna be a good person, and I'm still gonna remember all that you taught me.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_03: Amen.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_03: It's just this one thing that I'm gonna just not be.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_03: And and and I'll tell you, my mom has said to me since, and my dad, like, they don't worry about us anymore.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_03: The kids, like, they know we're all good people, we're all hard workers, we all grew up to be, I mean, 20 something years later, um, you know, they they can see that it all worked out, but at the time I can't imagine how scary that was for them.
• 25:54
  SPEAKER_03: And so it needed to be a um for me a respectful conversation.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my, and good for you for having that.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I think the biggest thing from my perspective is is that when you don't know what you don't know from the perspective of LDS and it's all you know in your whole whole entire life, like you said earlier, like your kids not being a part of that and going to public school and like you thinking, like, what does that look like for them, just as much as your parents thinking, like, what does that look like for you?
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_00: But then that's also curiosity for them because they're like, All right, well, you're good.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: I trust you, I love you, whatever.
• 26:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then they see that you're 20-something years later, you're good, you know, and now you're doing things to help people in a total different way, which we'll talk about a little bit later.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: That who would have known, but good for your parents for being loving and kind and and and just being those good-hearted souls to support their daughter in the process.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_03: I know.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_03: And I can say that with every bit of my non-Christian heart.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 26:53
  SPEAKER_03: But it's it's they emulate it, yeah.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_03: And and it's what I would expect from people who carry that banner.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_03: And so I love them for that.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: I love that, dude.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: Shout out to them.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_00: So the husband, so you got married.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_00: The the the first husband, you got married, and he was also part of the community.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_03: No, no, so uh didn't know him very well.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: Um, we met in a mosh pit at uh, you know, warp tour or something like that.
• 27:21
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, all right.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_03: So back to me being rebellious, I had a shaved head at this time.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like you can just imagine what a little firecracker I was.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_03: And so I met him um very shortly after I found out I was pregnant.
• 27:37
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, we got married within a month.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_03: And um, within a year and a half, we were getting a divorce.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_03: And um, you know, it it was I know I met him so that I could bring my beautiful children into the world and and shout out to him for putting up with young version of me.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_03: But we we truly were meant to, you know, we were we could have never stayed in that, but we've remained friends all these years.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: So wow, wow, that's amazing.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_00: Good for y'all to be able to at least, you know, co-create, be parents, support each other.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's awesome that like he wasn't a part of and at this time because you were already told your parents at what 17.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_00: So at this, at this point, you then at this point you were already just doing you anyways.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_00: So it was like whatever.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and have you ever talked to your kids about the process, LDS, what that means, and like have they ever talked to you or been curious about either wanting to practice that or practice anything?
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, what comes up for them?
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'm curious on how you navigated that.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_03: My parents were such a huge support system to me as a single mom.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I worked nights a lot of the times.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_03: They had my kids.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_03: If they were at my parents' house on a Sunday, they went to church with them.
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_03: So they okay, actually really experienced that.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_03: Nice.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I always told my kids, similar to what you told your daughter, find out your own truth.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm not, I will present you, I will put you in any room you want to learn information in.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but I will never make this decision for you.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_03: I will say, around eight years old, my daughter became really curious about the LDS church.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I actually invited um some local missionaries into my home uh to actually teach her.
• 29:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_03: Um, even though I wasn't it for me, I wanted her to be able to ask questions to people that weren't my mom and dad and her family, but could be objective.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_03: And I still remain friends with one of those missionaries to this day.
• 29:27
  SPEAKER_03: He was such a a blessing.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_03: And um, even though nothing came of that as far as her becoming a part of the church, she then attended a Catholic church, she attended uh some Christian academy.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I and I let her from eight to sixteen years old.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_03: She was very curious, and I always encouraged that.
• 29:47
  SPEAKER_03: I wanted to just gather that that information.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_03: Right now, neither of my children, uh uh mine, um my husband's do, but neither of my children attend like a regular uh church at this time.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_03: But they had all the opportunity in the world to make that choice.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_03: And I always wanted my house to be a house of like knowledge learning.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 30:07
  SPEAKER_03: We got the Tao in my home, I got the Bible in my home, I got it all.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_03: And um that's beautiful.
• 30:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I I found I've always studied world religions, and I've just found this this uh eternal truth throughout all of it, and I've always loved that part that we can hang on to.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_00: There's so much amazing, beautiful things in the Bible that it's just it's undeniable, yeah.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_00: You know, and I think that I if y'all, you know, love the Bible, read the Bible, hey, kudos.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like being open-minded, and that's why I developed this show, because what better way to be open-minded but then co-create with someone in a space for two hours, record it, put it out there, and have like this amazing mastermind understanding of all of these different ideologies and philosophies because you just don't know what you don't know.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_00: And it's almost like a crash course to level up in different ways, and that's why I love podcasts, that's why I like ebooks, and it just gives you the opportunity to be able to like, okay, cool, download, download, download.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I read a book most recently, absolutely beautiful book, and um I will put it out there, and we might lose this for a hot second, but uh I could probably even put it up there.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_00: But the book I just finished that I highly, highly recommend for anyone that's called to potentially listen to this book.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_00: This may not be for everyone, but uh it was Shadow Work, The Mere Method.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: And that book is amazing.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm not gonna get into it.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_00: I was just I've been wanting to understand 2030, and I've been like wanting to understand what that means and what what's gonna happen with all that, and now I know I'm very, I'm very I'm very clear about what's gonna happen in the next steps in that process.
• 31:49
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're watching this podcast, you're probably on the right track to be a part of the process of of what's gonna transcend to the next consciousness of the fourth.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_00: And so we won't go into all that, but I want to go now, let's go deeper into your story.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_00: So so you divorced at what age?
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_03: I divorced at 23.
• 32:06
  SPEAKER_00: 23.
• 32:07
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, now let's get into 24 because I know that at one you had that first experience, and at 24, you had another experience.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: That really opened up so much for you.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so let's get into the story.
• 32:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so I'm 24, and uh I'm I was in a car accident with about six others.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_03: We were out on in a rural area of Arizona that is now fully developed, but um years ago, uh, there was nothing out there.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_03: And um the accident, I was in an F-150 truck, we veered off the road and went through this adobe brickyard.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was driving and I I was unconscious the second that that uh we veered off the road.
• 32:53
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_03: And luckily, nobody else in the car was hurt, but but I was.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_03: And my head had gone through the side windshield um along with my elbow and stuff, and it split my head.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_03: These headsets aren't gonna let me from about here to here or I have a scar that runs runs up this way.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, yeah.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_03: I can see it there.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_03: So um immediately uh after the accident, um, I remember them kind of uh my friends all getting out of the car and yelling and screaming, and then they were trying to get this girl out of the car and they were they were pulling on her and unbooking her seatbelt.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_03: I watched my friend kind of take his shirt off and wrap it around her head and put her in the bed of this truck.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_03: And I remember being like, oh my gosh, and trying to like process what was all happening and how it all happened so fast.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_03: Um and then the next thing that I felt was this instant agonizing, excruciating pain in my body.
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I couldn't open my eyes.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_03: There was there was liquid over my, it was hot, and I couldn't see and I could just feel my eyes were closed, and and I felt in my head, but not in my head, and in my body, but not in my body.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_03: And then all of a sudden I was kind of watching it again.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_03: And um, so we can get more into that.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_03: But this accident that happened at 24, um, as you said, ultimately shaped a lot of things, but it was a a very uh traumatic accident.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_03: There um the the F-150 was totaled.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_03: The um we came within a hundred feet of a a trailer.
• 34:34
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_03: It was uh had people in it.
• 34:37
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, it was a pretty uh big accident, and I it's very miraculous that me and everyone involved walked away from the scene essentially.
• 34:45
  SPEAKER_00: And you remember like before that happened, was it like something in the road?
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: So you swerved off, or you did you just go unconscious before it happened?
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_00: Or great question.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, earlier on in the day, um, the reason I was using an F-150 truck, it was my parents' truck, is because my car had broken down and I was actually trying to fix the battery in it and take the battery out.
• 35:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I didn't have um the hood thing up properly, and it came down and it hit me in the back of the head and knocked me unconscious.
• 35:17
  SPEAKER_00: Before this.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_03: Before this.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_03: This is hours earlier.
• 35:20
  SPEAKER_00: And you thought you were fine.
• 35:21
  SPEAKER_03: I thought I was fine and didn't realize I had a severe concussion.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_03: So now around I don't know what time it would have been, um, but I was the DD driving my friends to uh around and I go unconscious.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_03: I go unconscious and veer off a road.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, wow, wow, wow.
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_00: Hey, uh, y'all get hit in the head at all.
• 35:44
  SPEAKER_00: Just get checked out.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe don't drive.
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_00: You don't drive.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was nauseated that day.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_03: I had been seeing spots.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_03: I there were so many things that were like signs that you were like signs that I needed to go to a doctor and probably not go to sleep that night, and all kinds of things that were now.
• 36:01
  SPEAKER_03: But at 24 years old, do we listen to our bodies?
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_03: Probably not as well as we do now.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_03: And it was my friend's birthday, and that seemed to take priority over of course my own health that was screaming at me.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_03: So, yeah, this um in this incident, I I fell that my friends said that we walked out of a circle K where they were buying some alcohol.
• 36:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and they got in the trunk, and my last memory is me putting my seatbelt on in the parking lot of that circle K.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_03: And they said I no more than pulled out of it driving down the road, and my head just went and then we veered off.
• 36:37
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, that's super scary, and um thank God you're still here for multiple reasons, and so when did you wake up?
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_00: When did you come back to to like your body and knowing the next day?
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you're pretty much out, besides and and what you observed and experienced was from a perspective of self, but maybe also maybe a spiritual perspective.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so what I would say about what I call this near-death experience is that the immediate thing that I felt and realized that I was not my body, that the this detachment of self, this watching what I realized was me down there getting um kind of cared for.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_03: And I just want to say from the time the accident happened and the first 911 call was placed to the time I was air vac from this time was two and a half hours.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_03: So when I described this kind of in and out of body experience, which was my first part of this um overall experience, it was very much a deep understanding of like, wait, that's me, but I'm here.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_03: She's there, who's she, what am I, how am I?
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_03: And at the same time, there wasn't a lot of question either.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_03: It was like this back to a knowing, it almost just made sense.
• 38:05
  SPEAKER_03: I had like human questions with it, but there was this like, oh, I'm not me, you know, or I'm not that, um, which is my favorite analogy that my husband gives is when you go scuba diving and we're certified scuba divers, and you put on your whole scuba suit and you go down into this experience and you have it, and you're in the underworld uh under the water where you can't exist without that suit.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but when you go up on top, you're still that thing that isn't the suit.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and that's maybe what what some of the first thoughts were.
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_03: And over the course of this two hours, I I went in and out of my body at least six times that I can remember.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but it was time didn't exist, things didn't exist, but I understood everything that was happening.
• 39:02
  SPEAKER_03: I could see and hear everything, I could hear them working on my body, I could hear and understand their thoughts and emotions.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_03: I I there's one guy that kept running out to the road to call 911 again because nobody was coming and I was dying.
• 39:20
  SPEAKER_03: And he would run back to the road and he ran out again.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_03: And I remember being like, I could feel how frustrated he was with this whole thing that when we got in an accident, he was mad at me.
• 39:32
  SPEAKER_03: He was mad at, you know, there was all these things, but I could hear and feel it all and all simultaneously.
• 39:39
  SPEAKER_03: I could tell every single one of them what they were doing and feeling and experiencing in every single moment.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm just watching so intently this body and what this body is experiencing.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_03: So my focus was on the body, but everything around me was just there.
• 39:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and I could feel and experience it all at once.
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
• 40:02
  SPEAKER_00: It gives you a totally different perspective of like, I like to talk about personal development, and I like to talk about the idea of like you have to look at yourself.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_00: So you have to look in the mirror, look at self, you have to go deep to ask yourself the questions, what are you committed to to be able to grow, to be able to see your flaws, to work through things, and for you to be able to have that level of knowing is so beautiful.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_00: Like you yourself and then everyone else at the same time, like wow, like that's so so miraculous and so profound.
• 40:38
  SPEAKER_00: So when you woke up, what was the first couple thoughts coming to your mind?
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_00: Like you just had this six times in and out of your body, this awareness, this knowing, and then what 24, 48 hours, what have you, you wake up and you're just at the hospital?
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_03: I'm in a hospital bed.
• 40:58
  SPEAKER_03: I don't I I gasped into my body.
• 41:01
  SPEAKER_03: My mom was in a I know I remember the second I got set back.
• 41:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so that, but uh, it was the first words I said.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_03: I said, I just died.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_03: I just like I was trying to articulate immediately within minutes what I had just experienced to my mom.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 41:20
  SPEAKER_03: And um, as one of the friends came to visit me in the hospital, her name's Crystal.
• 41:25
  SPEAKER_03: She was at the accident with me.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, You were there, and Justin took off his shirt and he put it on my head.
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_03: They're married now.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_03: Crystal and Justin.
• 41:35
  SPEAKER_00: You know, they're freaking out right now.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they're married to this day.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_03: So that was their love story at the beginning of my uh car accident.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_03: But I told her everything that happened at the scene, and that's part of the story that I've probably told the most over the years to my close friends and family, my children, I've told this story of leaving my body, watching the accident, do it.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um, in the more recent years, since my husband's gifts and everything, I've kind of told the rest of the story.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but it's taken me 20 years to develop a language around it that even can make it make sense.
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_03: Because at 24, I didn't have the mental, social, yeah, uh, spiritual uh understanding to comprehend or be able to say everything.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_03: But immediately in the hospital, I was telling people about being dead and watching the entire thing play out.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 42:37
  SPEAKER_03: That's that's that was my first words out of the out of the thing.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_00: And and I think that the biggest thing is that what comes up for me is like once you see it, there is no unseeing it.
• 42:50
  SPEAKER_00: No, and I don't know who can relate to this for your own stories out there.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like something like um, you could do it entrepreneur, you could use it for that.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, you could use it for relationship, you could use it for that, you could use it for whatever it is cars, golfing, relation, whatever.
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: And it's one of those things that like I think you going through that gave humanity at the scale of your influence the opportunity to see something different and to maybe conceptualize that even being a thing.
• 43:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because I think that we've been so indoctrinated that, um, and depending on the viewers and listeners out there, you know, there's one all the way to I don't know, what is it, 1220 D.
• 43:34
  SPEAKER_00: So the different dimensions, and with the third dimension of physical existence from the perspective of us being a conscious being to be able to speak, to be able to know, to be able to experience, um, going to the next, which would be the fourth, is what I feel like your gift is is to then share, to be able to let people understand that hey.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_00: There could just be something more than what we can touch and feel and see within this reality, with this existence.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_00: And so, um, I'm gonna veer off just a tad.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 44:12
  SPEAKER_00: But it's gonna be in alignment.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_00: So my wife and I were watching Gaia this week, and we're watching a series on witches.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_00: And this woman went back to her lineage to find out that she was a part of basically how there was in England the witch hunt and all that type of stuff, and she was a part of this lineage and found this guy and all this research, and she actually found out that she was a reincarnation of the woman who was hung during that time.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so it got me thinking about the the philosophy of the soul and the idea of if each soul, and I could feel this you know, if each soul is a different experience of consciousness, and if we are just all one, then it's like say uh red car, blue car, pink car, whatever car I like cars, you know.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_00: So that's just the type of car type experience that you're gonna receive.
• 45:09
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm having my experience, you're having your experience, and we and they say that time is linear.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_00: There is no, it's all happening now, right?
• 45:18
  SPEAKER_00: So so even though we think that, like, oh yeah, hold on, I'm this age and I was this age at this time, and yes, there is time from here to there, but really, is there?
• 45:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's just now, and so I got me thinking about like, hold on.
• 45:30
  SPEAKER_00: So if we were to have more access to past life progression and our lineage, then we can literally be like, huh, where am I now in time in different segments of reality?
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_00: And you can go all the way back to 1700s, 1500s, whatever you go to the go out to you know, 30s and above, and maybe you're alien, I don't know.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_00: So it just made me think about the whole concept of that.
• 45:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, hmm, that's very interesting.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_00: And and it just made me think to myself, like, wow, like so once you become more aware of things like this, like you are, it just gives you a total different concept.
• 46:08
  SPEAKER_00: So a little tangent when uh in that.
• 46:10
  SPEAKER_04: So don't take the blue pill, you'll go down the rabbit hole.
• 46:15
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, exactly.
• 46:16
  SPEAKER_00: So, okay, so how do you navigate hospital bed, telling who you told, and living with this, and then having this in the back of your mind for so many years, and like because I can imagine like so many questions.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, so I think that that uh there's a lot into how it's integrated into my life over this last 20 years.
• 46:42
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I think to tell that I may, I may go back just a bit in that experience of kind of leaving my body, being in my body, being above my body, all that.
• 46:53
  SPEAKER_03: As I said, that was about two and a half hours of this experience of this 24, 30 hour, 40, whatever hour experience it was.
• 47:01
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I have since got my medical records from uh I was air, I was airlifted as a Jane Doe to Maricopa County community hospital.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_03: So um, you know, I was a Jane Doe there and I I was able to get my records years ago.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_03: So it was somewhere in the 30, you know, I don't know exactly when it was.
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but it was the next day night.
• 47:24
  SPEAKER_03: So this happened sometimes that night, and then then I wake up sometime here and do some physical therapy, and they're like, follow up with a neurologist, because it's a community health hospital.
• 47:33
  SPEAKER_03: So um, although a trauma hospital, as long as you're not bleeding to death right then, they fast exit you.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_00: So um come on, money, time.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_03: I had a lot of yeah, I was a Jane Doe, they're like, this is an insurance waste, but yeah, I I paid off that bill.
• 47:48
  SPEAKER_03: But um before I woke up, uh as I'm as I'm watching and observing this experience, eventually this helicopter comes and they cut off my clothes, and I get airlifted as I say to there, and I hear them be like, What's her name?
• 48:05
  SPEAKER_03: And uh and all this stuff, anyways, I get it, Jane Doe.
• 48:08
  SPEAKER_03: But the whole time that that was happening, I'm staring down at what is like this, it felt like an eye view, and I could zoom in real close and be right next to you and smell your breath, or I could be up here and watch you run half a mile to call 911, and it was time was linear, space was linear, I was telepathic, but in a feeling way and knowing way, and all this.
• 48:34
  SPEAKER_03: It was like everything that was happening.
• 48:37
  SPEAKER_03: And as my body gets airlifted in this helicopter and go away, it's almost like that eye zoomed out, and I didn't follow my body, I didn't go with my body.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_03: There was this vibration happening behind me, and almost this like living energy that I could feel existing.
• 48:58
  SPEAKER_03: And so as the helicopter flies away, I turn and enter into what I can only describe as like a tunnel of light.
• 49:07
  SPEAKER_02: Got it.
• 49:08
  SPEAKER_03: Except this light wasn't light like you have, it was this living organism breathing thing that was almost iridescent and glowing.
• 49:20
  SPEAKER_03: But as I got into it and closer, um it felt like it was made of living uh beings almost, and I could hear, but not like words, but it was like it's her, it's her, she's here, she's here.
• 49:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um and there was this like I knew I was supposed to keep going towards it.
• 49:39
  SPEAKER_00: That's how beautiful.
• 49:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and so as I got through there and into this thing, the first I there was no arrival.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_03: It was like suddenly energetically, I became it.
• 49:54
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't move through anything when they say go through a tunnel of light, it was like I morphed into vibrating with the energy is a better way for me to describe what I felt.
• 50:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 50:06
  SPEAKER_03: But as I entered this space, um, and it felt like this threshold of coming and going, there were it was a vast space as far as I could stretch and see.
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_03: And the there were people.
• 50:25
  SPEAKER_03: I I could see people talking and and people there and whispers, and I could understand that they were there.
• 50:32
  SPEAKER_03: And then right in front of me as I arrived was my great-grandma.
• 50:36
  SPEAKER_02: Beautiful.
• 50:37
  SPEAKER_03: And she basically says, What are you doing here?
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_03: She had passed away about five hours five years before in Earth terms.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_03: And she said, What are you doing here?
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, I died.
• 50:49
  SPEAKER_03: I just I just watched it happen.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_03: Like I witnessed the whole thing.
• 50:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm dead, and now I'm here.
• 50:55
  SPEAKER_03: I wasn't sad, I didn't feel bad.
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_03: It was like, this is my next step in life.
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I I just I accepted it so immediately.
• 51:05
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 51:06
  SPEAKER_03: And was like, this is now where I live permanently.
• 51:09
  SPEAKER_03: Like it just was, I laugh at the acceptance because if it happened now, I'd be like, wait, life is so cool, take me back.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_03: But at 24 years old, growing up Mormon, becoming pregnant, getting divorced, saying no to my religion, but still being just a disaster of what I thought of a human, as far as like things that you do that make you responsible.
• 51:33
  SPEAKER_03: I was doing those opposite things that I judged, others judged.
• 51:39
  SPEAKER_03: And so I think that in this moment of I'm here, it was a piece of like this feels amazing.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_03: Because I'm I'm talking about what I'm seeing, but I think I think a deeper part is what I was feeling.
• 51:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and feeling is such a rough word to say, but yeah, so beautiful though.
• 52:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 52:01
  SPEAKER_00: And did she say it's time to go back?
• 52:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she was like, You're you get out of here.
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_03: You're not supposed to be here.
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, Absolutely, I am.
• 52:07
  SPEAKER_03: And I just felt so every cell in my body felt like it had been nourished and fed and loved and comfortable.
• 52:15
  SPEAKER_03: There was no what I what I recognized was it's hard to say what it was, because like unconditional love is such a cheap phrase and a cliche thing to say.
• 52:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but it was the absence of what I didn't feel.
• 52:32
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't feel judgment, I didn't feel less than, I didn't feel like I don't belong.
• 52:39
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't question.
• 52:40
  SPEAKER_03: There was no negative anything.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_03: And I think it the abundance of the lack of that was like overwhelming to every part of what was my being.
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like I feel like for the viewers and listeners, like true freedom is that and understanding that the challenge of this world, this time and space is the fruits.
• 53:06
  SPEAKER_00: And once you understand that that's the fruits, and you take those challenges and you rise up to those occasions.
• 53:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I was talking to my eight-year-old daughter last night, and she was just like, nobody likes me at school.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_00: They don't like me.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_00: There's this girl, she's catty, man, whatever.
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_00: I said, Until this morning, I said, Jordan, I said, those are the challenges that you need to rise up to.
• 53:26
  SPEAKER_00: I said, those are the opportunities for you to go to that school.
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_00: And she said, uh, she has pretty blue blonde hair and blue eyes, and she wears a jack.
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_00: I said, Comment on that before she says anything to you.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_00: Comment on that and comment on those jacket, the shoes, the hair, whatever.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like, kill them with kindness and rise up to the occasion and look at that as and that's what I've really embodied in this time and space.
• 53:52
  SPEAKER_00: And it's so beautiful because like the fact that like we we can be here in this time and space and breathe this, breathe this oxygen, have the sun, and and drive cars and be in airplanes, and travel and eat, and it's like it's it it's very beautiful.
• 54:08
  SPEAKER_03: Oh gosh, this this human earth experience that's it's amazing.
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_03: Is like there's nowhere in this atmosphere, in this galaxy, and time and space I would rather be.
• 54:20
  SPEAKER_03: And I think that's what this whole experience gave me was I always had a zest for life.
• 54:27
  SPEAKER_03: I always probably scared people at the at the rate in which I lived um and and experienced, but this gave me such a deep appreciation for the beauty of this experience.
• 54:44
  SPEAKER_03: For and and we'll talk more about that shadow side because that plays into uh what I learned and what I saw.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but yeah, so she's like, get out of here.
• 54:53
  SPEAKER_03: You're not supposed to be here.
• 54:54
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm I'm sitting there being like, are you kidding me?
• 54:58
  SPEAKER_03: You're not kicking me out of here.
• 54:59
  SPEAKER_03: You know what that experience is like.
• 55:01
  SPEAKER_03: I suck at that experience, like failure 101, um, 24-year-old single mom here.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 55:08
  SPEAKER_03: So uh what a silly judgment um to put on yourself, but yeah, it's what I felt.
• 55:14
  SPEAKER_03: And so about that time, a male energy came up to me, and and he what I understood him to be was a guide for me.
• 55:26
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I recognized him.
• 55:28
  SPEAKER_03: We had met before.
• 55:30
  SPEAKER_03: There was just this extreme familiarity, and he was just wise, and uh there was so much about him, and he too said, uh, and when I say said, no mouths were moved, no words were spoken.
• 55:46
  SPEAKER_03: Everyone almost had this like light smile on their face, and then you're just talking through your energy, and so he also was like, What are you doing here?
• 55:57
  SPEAKER_03: Why are you here?
• 55:58
  SPEAKER_03: And I was like, I just died, guys.
• 56:01
  SPEAKER_03: And there was this tunnel that was like off in the left in that, and it was this other living thing, and I understood that like if I got through there, that's home.
• 56:13
  SPEAKER_03: This is not home.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_03: I was on a path to home.
• 56:16
  SPEAKER_03: There was like a homing beacon in me that was like, that's through there is home.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_03: And I think he saw me kind of eyeballing it.
• 56:24
  SPEAKER_03: And there was a part of me that like this rebellious shaved-head girl was like, I could make a break for it.
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I could I'm going, I could get there, and you know, of course, he can hear my thoughts too.
• 56:34
  SPEAKER_03: So I don't know how sneaky I thought I was being, but yeah, yeah.
• 56:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um, he basically said, Can I show you something?
• 56:40
  SPEAKER_03: And um took me over to what I can describe as this room of living screens.
• 56:50
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 56:51
  SPEAKER_03: And living as in time, space.
• 56:57
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I was watching it, but I could be in it too.
• 57:01
  SPEAKER_03: There was nothing separating me from what I was seeing or experiencing.
• 57:06
  SPEAKER_03: I got to choose my level of separation as I was experiencing it.
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_03: I've heard people call this as a life review, but for me, um it was a I was so convinced that I was not valuable in this world, that the world was better without me.
• 57:24
  SPEAKER_03: And I know we've all felt that at different times.
• 57:27
  SPEAKER_00: Can you relate that?
• 57:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_03: And at 24, as I keep saying, that was really loud.
• 57:33
  SPEAKER_03: And what he showed me first was my life.
• 57:38
  SPEAKER_03: But it was, and it was my life, and it and the second that he showed me in my life, he also showed me what it would be like if I wasn't in it.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_03: He would take me out and let that exact moment in first grade where I turned to a girl and said, Your hair looks pretty today.
• 57:56
  SPEAKER_03: I like that jacket you're wearing.
• 58:00
  SPEAKER_03: What that did to them makes me cry every time.
• 58:03
  SPEAKER_03: Their heart, their experience, these moments that I thought were meaningless, that didn't matter, a simple act of kindness, a thing.
• 58:12
  SPEAKER_03: They were showing me my life with me in it, and then what would have happened if I wasn't there?
• 58:18
  SPEAKER_03: And he was saying to me, Don't you see that you matter?
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_03: Don't you see that everyone matters?
• 58:27
  SPEAKER_03: I think what I got from that moment was this understanding that we were all in this like mycelial network where every one of us is contributing, whether it's the fact that I'm dying in sorrow hurting, that's contributing the overall, and so's the happiness, and so's that.
• 58:45
  SPEAKER_03: And all these moments where I had applied judgment or I had applied anger, or I had applied all these things, he was like, those were just experiences.
• 58:56
  SPEAKER_03: Why are you saying they were good or bad when they were teaching you?
• 58:59
  SPEAKER_03: Your humanness is calling that moment bad, but I just gave it to you because you asked to learn that.
• 59:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, don't you see that you were required in these moments, not just for your learning, but for others, that every moment, every little thing is connected.
• 59:16
  SPEAKER_03: And it was like I was able to see the connection, the oneness, the value, that network.
• 59:22
  SPEAKER_03: Beautiful, wow, all in this view, yeah, and just profound.
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 59:28
  SPEAKER_00: Jeez Louise, that is amazing.
• 59:30
  SPEAKER_00: I can imagine we're getting a 25 plus years.
• 59:34
  SPEAKER_00: You digest this, you've talked about it a lot to really articulate how to even explain this process that you went through.
• 59:42
  SPEAKER_03: There's no human words.
• 59:44
  SPEAKER_03: This this whole experience operated, our language is built for time and space.
• 59:50
  SPEAKER_03: Now, hear that, and I was in a realm or an experience that didn't operate in any of that.
• 59:57
  SPEAKER_03: So you're right, it has taken me 20 years to say it was a living screen because I don't know what else to call that, right?
• 1:00:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you hear there's so if you don't watch Gaia, Gaia has different shows, and there's near-death experience shows that you can listen to, and they have similar stories of what you were talking about.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you're actually one of the I think you're the first guest we've had on the topic of near-death experience and or basically dying and then coming back.
• 1:00:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it's beautiful to hear it and the fact that you've had so long to articulate it because it's so true.
• 1:00:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like we communicate through these words, like you said, time and space, third dimension, what have you.
• 1:00:37
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and you know, there's a lot of limitations with them, and there's a lot of preconceived notions with them from the perspective of how we've been raised and who raised us and what we listen to, and all the things.
• 1:00:49
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're still listening to this over an hour, and you're a real one.
• 1:00:52
  SPEAKER_00: Hope we hope you're enjoying and got some popcorn relaxing.
• 1:00:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um that's amazing.
• 1:00:58
  SPEAKER_00: So then at what point is then he's then you just wake up?
• 1:01:03
  SPEAKER_03: No, that's so like I it's so weird to think, and and just recently I had to like reconcile that all this happened in this, you know, day period because I felt like I was up there for years.
• 1:01:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so uh there's kind of two big chunks that happened after this.
• 1:01:23
  SPEAKER_03: After you kind of showed me my current life and up until then, yeah.
• 1:01:27
  SPEAKER_03: At that point, I understood what, or I was beginning to understand what life was and what my involvement was with it.
• 1:01:34
  SPEAKER_03: And I and that, and as I said, that life was this combination of all these experiences, good, bad, right, and that the judgment we put on it should be viewed as almost like a you know, a little bingo card of life that's like, I got to have grief and I got to have pain, and I got to have the most deep unconditional love, and all those experiences make up what this thing is like because all those experiences teach us.
• 1:02:04
  SPEAKER_02: Amen.
• 1:02:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then he showed me kind of a different view, which was more what I could describe as what was going to happen next.
• 1:02:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um and some of this is very clear, other parts have been vague, but as I've lived it, as I've experienced it, um, those parts that are fuggusy or vague or just how to reach, I just know they haven't happened yet.
• 1:02:27
  SPEAKER_03: Um and I don't remember as much visually seeing this, but I know how certain things felt.
• 1:02:34
  SPEAKER_03: I saw my kids, how they were gonna grow up and how much life we still had to live together, and that what beautiful adults and friends we were going to be.
• 1:02:45
  SPEAKER_03: Um and I could say honestly, that what I felt and all that, I feel like I I've got to experience.
• 1:02:51
  SPEAKER_03: I got to know that I would have love one day, and that um I got to feel what it was gonna feel like when I was in that relationship.
• 1:03:03
  SPEAKER_03: And when I first met Kevin, I know we talked earlier about how that happened, but when I first met him and we're sitting at dinner on our first date, I looked at him, I was like, Oh, there you are.
• 1:03:13
  SPEAKER_03: And that became his first nickname because it was almost the second that I met him, he was familiar and I had felt him before, and I I knew what it was going to feel like.
• 1:03:24
  SPEAKER_03: And now, 10 years down the line, 13 years together, 10 years married, I can say this was the love I felt there.
• 1:03:32
  SPEAKER_03: And and I have it now, and and knew that it was Kevin.
• 1:03:36
  SPEAKER_00: Question Yeah, just got the download.
• 1:03:41
  SPEAKER_00: Could have Kevin been the person who met you when you were dead at that moment and was the wise one.
• 1:03:51
  SPEAKER_03: Knowing my husband, I I see why you got that.
• 1:03:54
  SPEAKER_03: I actually, this being had not ever been to Earth, is what I'll say about him.
• 1:03:59
  SPEAKER_02: Got it.
• 1:03:59
  SPEAKER_02: But got it, got it.
• 1:04:00
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 1:04:01
  SPEAKER_03: Uh future podcasts, we should talk about that because Kevin and I have had this and uh that in other experiences.
• 1:04:10
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, and I understood that my role in life was to be a bridge between worlds.
• 1:04:17
  SPEAKER_03: He I did receive that in this next thing that that I had and would help bridge.
• 1:04:24
  SPEAKER_03: And now um, you know, doing uh volunteer death doula work and all that kind of stuff.
• 1:04:30
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I can honestly say that uh that dream of, and I love death, as you can hear in all this.
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_03: I'll talk about death all day long.
• 1:04:38
  SPEAKER_03: Um I love being there for it, like people love being at a birth.
• 1:04:41
  SPEAKER_03: It's one of my most spiritual, beautiful experiences, and and I've since been able to help bridge that and help people cross over.
• 1:04:48
  SPEAKER_03: So it's it's a gift now that I've been able to share with others.
• 1:04:52
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, so I got to see that future, I got to see Kevin um, or at least feel what Kevin was, so that I would recognize it when I found him and and that happened.
• 1:05:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and this whole time that this is all happening, I have to say, I understood, you know.
• 1:05:11
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, is there a show that you just absolutely love and can like basically quote word for word, even if you're not in the room and see it, or a movie or something like that?
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_03: Little House on the Prairie is one for me.
• 1:05:21
  SPEAKER_03: So it's funny that you mentioned that.
• 1:05:22
  SPEAKER_03: I did my hair like her every day as a kid.
• 1:05:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's adorable.
• 1:05:25
  SPEAKER_03: Or the sewn dresses, and it couldn't be more dead on that you called it that.
• 1:05:29
  SPEAKER_03: But there's shows.
• 1:05:30
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm in the hospital, I'm getting my head stitched up, there's nurses saving me.
• 1:05:36
  SPEAKER_03: I hear everything that's happening.
• 1:05:39
  SPEAKER_03: It was almost like there was a TV on.
• 1:05:41
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, sorry, TV on in the other room that I knew every word to, but I didn't have to be in the room to see it, hear it, feel it, or whatever.
• 1:05:50
  SPEAKER_03: It was just existing and I had full awareness of I could in my head map out everything that was happening, even though I didn't see it.
• 1:05:58
  SPEAKER_03: So that's happening there.
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_03: And he did tell me, like, I said, okay, I'm ready to go back now after that future.
• 1:06:05
  SPEAKER_03: I said, um, I saw what my kids' life was gonna be like without me if I didn't go back, and there was just no need for that pain.
• 1:06:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and there was no need, like my pain at 24 was nothing compared to what I would, what they would go through and what their life would have been like if I didn't come back.
• 1:06:21
  SPEAKER_03: And so that's all I needed uh to come back.
• 1:06:24
  SPEAKER_03: But he did, you know, that was kind of the the big part.
• 1:06:27
  SPEAKER_03: He he did say, You're resting now.
• 1:06:30
  SPEAKER_03: And I knew I was put being put, my mom had come into the room and I was being put um a little bit medicated to let my head uh quit selling, and they kind of put me under.
• 1:06:39
  SPEAKER_03: And when they put me under, he said, Do you want to learn more?
• 1:06:42
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, I do.
• 1:06:43
  SPEAKER_03: I want to understand what this life is.
• 1:06:46
  SPEAKER_03: Why earth?
• 1:06:47
  SPEAKER_03: Why now?
• 1:06:48
  SPEAKER_03: What is this?
• 1:06:50
  SPEAKER_03: And in an instant, he pulled me over to these rolling hills where every blade of grass was like iridescent, as if light was coming through.
• 1:06:59
  SPEAKER_03: Beautiful, like everything was made of light, not light wasn't shining in it.
• 1:07:04
  SPEAKER_03: There were these hummingbirds that were like this big and iridescently white that were flying all around me, and these deer and trees, and it was just like like I don't know where I'm just sitting on this hill up on this thing.
• 1:07:21
  SPEAKER_03: And you know, this part of the story I don't I don't say a lot, and I I think it's a lot deeper and a deeper conversation, but we really got into he let me ask questions.
• 1:07:32
  SPEAKER_03: I got to sit at Jesus' feet.
• 1:07:35
  SPEAKER_00: That's beautiful.
• 1:07:36
  SPEAKER_03: I got to hear the lessons as he was teaching them.
• 1:07:39
  SPEAKER_03: I got to exist in different time and sit at Buddha's feet.
• 1:07:45
  SPEAKER_03: And I got to do these different things and I got to hear that common thread of message way back before I studied world religion.
• 1:07:52
  SPEAKER_03: It was like I could understand what they were all saying.
• 1:07:55
  SPEAKER_03: I heard the truth in it.
• 1:07:58
  SPEAKER_03: Um I understood that this was that we chose to come here, that this was a place that we knew we could advance the most, that we could learn the hardest.
• 1:08:09
  SPEAKER_03: And this was one of the only places of learning um that exists that allows pain and negativity in order for you to be stretched further.
• 1:08:21
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and there was a lot I learned there.
• 1:08:23
  SPEAKER_03: But at the end of that, he said, Are you ready to go back?
• 1:08:26
  SPEAKER_03: I said, Absolutely.
• 1:08:27
  SPEAKER_03: And then, as I said, uh it was almost this instant, I was on the hill, and then I was like going and waking up out of the hospital bed.
• 1:08:36
  SPEAKER_03: It was like I was sitting up and just there, and it was it was that fast.
• 1:08:41
  SPEAKER_00: And so from the time that you woke up at that moment to now, you've had a lot of time to digest all this.
• 1:08:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I can imagine over the time to digest it, you could probably also like get additional downloads almost.
• 1:08:54
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, would you say that now compared to then things have become more clear?
• 1:08:58
  SPEAKER_03: A thousand percent.
• 1:09:00
  SPEAKER_03: And not only more clear for me, um, but as again, life happened, those things made sense that were.
• 1:09:08
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, he told me in that future state when he was telling me about the future, uh, he said, You're gonna go back, and they're gonna be some of the hardest years of your life.
• 1:09:18
  unknown: Wow.
• 1:09:19
  SPEAKER_03: You're not done learning, and you're not gonna understand this right away.
• 1:09:24
  SPEAKER_03: But as it's meant to, it will unfold and all of this will make more sense to you.
• 1:09:30
  SPEAKER_03: It's almost like I came back in a bit of an existential crisis.
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't have the emotional maturity or depth, as I said, or anything to like take all that and apply it to my life.
• 1:09:44
  SPEAKER_03: A lot.
• 1:09:44
  SPEAKER_03: It was too much.
• 1:09:45
  SPEAKER_03: It was too much that's taken me years to understand and put into world.
• 1:09:52
  SPEAKER_03: You have to understand, I grew up with a very strict religion that told me one thing, then I'm dead, and I'm learning what parts of that were truth and what parts of that weren't ringing true for me.
• 1:10:03
  SPEAKER_03: And then and then I'm right back as a 24-year-old single mom with a three-year and one-year-old.
• 1:10:11
  SPEAKER_03: And he was right.
• 1:10:13
  SPEAKER_03: The next few years of my life, if I thought I hadn't lived in those um 24 to 28, it took everything in me to be sitting here today.
• 1:10:24
  unknown: Wow.
• 1:10:24
  SPEAKER_03: I wish I could say that death experience was it, but it was that.
• 1:10:29
  SPEAKER_03: And so it did take me a long time to be on the I was in and out of my body and I saw everything at the accident.
• 1:10:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's rainbows and sunshine.
• 1:10:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that second part was just something I couldn't talk about.
• 1:10:41
  SPEAKER_03: And when I met my husband, there were, you know, certain friends that I did talk about it with that were open and willing to let me fumble through the experience.
• 1:10:50
  SPEAKER_03: But um, it really was Kevin uh that gave me um the backing and the knowledge and the understanding, and actually the remote viewing without me saying anything, and told me back what had happened for me to go, I wasn't crazy.
• 1:11:10
  SPEAKER_03: That did all happen.
• 1:11:12
  SPEAKER_03: I did experience everything that I have had memories of experiencing because it was so out of body, it was so disconnected.
• 1:11:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 1:11:22
  SPEAKER_03: Uh to be in a world of geometric shapes that are living, there was no language for it for me to even talk about until the last 10 years.
• 1:11:34
  SPEAKER_00: So interesting.
• 1:11:36
  SPEAKER_00: At what point, meeting your now new husband, Kevin, who we'll have on the show, at what point did you actually start to talk to him a bit?
• 1:11:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I know that he has his own story that also unlocked his gifts, probably, I can imagine, before he even got to a look a place to be able to reiterate things to you, right?
• 1:11:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:11:57
  SPEAKER_03: So he always knew that I had this near-death experience.
• 1:12:00
  SPEAKER_03: Again, there's so many people in my world and existence that knew um that I died and I kind of saw my life and I had a it's a wonderful life moment of seeing what my life looked without it.
• 1:12:12
  SPEAKER_03: There were those high-level um moments that I always shared with people, and it was a deep experience for me, but a lot of that stuff underneath, um, Kevin and I have probably talked about at this level in it since Kevin's gifts came about, and he was able to also share in a language with me so that we could share it together.
• 1:12:35
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 1:12:36
  SPEAKER_00: So you would say, how long were you with Kevin before that even came into fruition as far as like those deeper conversations that we're having now?
• 1:12:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, probably four or five years of us having the high-level conversation before we were able to get into the like lessons, the knowing, the all that stuff.
• 1:12:55
  SPEAKER_03: It was it was quite some time before I could do it.
• 1:12:59
  SPEAKER_03: And there was probably only one other person I had really told everything to.
• 1:13:02
  SPEAKER_00: It sounds like you were the catalyst for him to be able to open up his gifts and maybe knowing or unknowing, so then that way, full circle moment, you can then be able to relive or understand what you went through during that experience of the near-death.
• 1:13:21
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:13:21
  SPEAKER_03: I was on this spiritual journey for 20 years, and Kevin really wasn't.
• 1:13:25
  SPEAKER_03: He also left um a high control religion, just so happens to be Mormonism as well.
• 1:13:31
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't know how I found my Mormon boy, but I did.
• 1:13:34
  SPEAKER_03: And it took him a long time to kind of reconcile that with spirituality and move into the gifts that he has now.
• 1:13:42
  SPEAKER_00: So that's beautiful, that's absolutely amazing.
• 1:13:44
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the and the like the likelihood of him also being a part of LDS is so interesting.
• 1:13:51
  SPEAKER_03: I met a California boy.
• 1:13:52
  SPEAKER_03: How does this happen to me?
• 1:13:53
  SPEAKER_03: I think it's a I think it's a cosmic joke, but it's so that we could have a common language.
• 1:13:58
  SPEAKER_03: Like, who else could I have a common language with to like sort through that into this?
• 1:14:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um that was your whole entire upbringing.
• 1:14:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you know, yeah, and at 15 I wrote down like it they would always tell us to write down in church that we wanted to marry like a return missionary who's this, and write all these like religious criteria.
• 1:14:19
  SPEAKER_03: And I wrote on my thing, I want to marry an Eagle Scout, and Kevin's an Eagle Scout.
• 1:14:23
  SPEAKER_03: So I manifested him.
• 1:14:25
  SPEAKER_00: Shout out Kevin, let's go.
• 1:14:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's that's absolutely beautiful, and um and what an interesting, amazing, beautiful, even like like woven, interwoven co-creation for both of you to do these things and to live these these ways.
• 1:14:44
  SPEAKER_00: And so let's give the viewers a little context.
• 1:14:47
  SPEAKER_00: So when you say the the next two years are some of the hardest, like like for just frame of reference for people to relate, what kind of things were you going through?
• 1:14:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, I really appreciate you asking that.
• 1:14:59
  SPEAKER_03: It's it uh I met someone, um, and he was, you know, at the time, you know, outside my ex-husband, who that was a really fast relationship, and and I think we can both own that we weren't in love, we just were in life, and um, and that happened in this way.
• 1:15:20
  SPEAKER_03: I thought this was the love of my life.
• 1:15:23
  SPEAKER_03: And he ended up being a very harmful human.
• 1:15:28
  SPEAKER_03: And uh, you know, there was physical abuse, um, there was emotion.
• 1:15:32
  SPEAKER_03: I'll take the beatings any day, guys.
• 1:15:34
  SPEAKER_03: The emotional abuse is what turns you on your head and makes you feel like you just uh can't get up.
• 1:15:39
  SPEAKER_03: And I I am such a strong that I I remember thinking, hearing stories about my aunt dealing unfortunately with a domestic violence thing and being like, that would never happen to me.
• 1:15:51
  SPEAKER_03: I'm strong.
• 1:15:52
  SPEAKER_03: And what I came to learn real fast is it is us strong ones that get it the hardest because we're not gonna back down and we're not gonna not take it.
• 1:16:02
  SPEAKER_03: And so it becomes even harder and the game you have to play to keep yourself safe.
• 1:16:09
  SPEAKER_03: Um but it it was it was to the point of my life that I told many people that if I don't make it, it's him.
• 1:16:17
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 1:16:18
  SPEAKER_03: And uh there were many nights where I had I had to sleep different places and be on the run.
• 1:16:24
  SPEAKER_03: It was a very, very scary thing, and I'm very lucky that he moved on from that fixation on me.
• 1:16:33
  SPEAKER_03: I feel very sorry for anyone else that has encountered him since.
• 1:16:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um but it was one of those things that breaks you down um and requires you to rebuild yourself from scratch.
• 1:16:46
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I think what's beautiful about that is we just talked about um when I was 30, I carried twins for a friend of mine.
• 1:16:56
  SPEAKER_03: And it was because of this experience that I really wanted to create a baby in love, and I wanted to be able to do something big on the backside of what was a many year journey of healing and and uh getting my life and myself back on track.
• 1:17:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um and me carrying those fri twins for my friends was a huge motivation of that of like, I gotta turn, I gotta alchemize this into good and beauty and love and all this stuff.
• 1:17:32
  SPEAKER_03: And then within six months of that, I met Kevin and that that was it.
• 1:17:37
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:17:38
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, shout out for you to carry someone else's babies is beautiful.
• 1:17:43
  SPEAKER_00: Uh for you to go through that, uh, you know, like the use of term, either life happens for you or to you.
• 1:17:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like that happened for you for a reason as you already knew you were supposed to go through some rough times um to become who you are today to serve those who you once were.
• 1:17:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I can imagine someone's viewing and listening and and relating.
• 1:18:02
  SPEAKER_00: And um, I know for me, um, you can listen to my wife's story, she can relate to that.
• 1:18:08
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, very strong woman as well.
• 1:18:10
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I know that I could relate to that because my mom's a very strong woman as well, and I witness her being beaten.
• 1:18:18
  SPEAKER_04: The strongest.
• 1:18:19
  SPEAKER_00: And she's very strong as well.
• 1:18:21
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and so it it it for whoever is viewing and listening, it's happening for you for a reason.
• 1:18:28
  SPEAKER_00: There's a silver lining, just understand that as hard as it is, and whatever it is that you're going through, just keep moving forward.
• 1:18:36
  SPEAKER_03: Well, and listen, listen again to that voice inside you till it's the loudest voice you hear.
• 1:18:41
  SPEAKER_03: There were so many times in that experience where it was my yesno that got me out of really dangerous circumstances.
• 1:18:49
  SPEAKER_03: Don't don't pull up to your house and park your car.
• 1:18:52
  SPEAKER_03: He was there.
• 1:18:53
  SPEAKER_03: Don't do this.
• 1:18:54
  SPEAKER_03: And I got really good in that time honing in my yesno.
• 1:18:59
  SPEAKER_03: And I contribute that to a lot of what then navigated me the rest of my life.
• 1:19:05
  SPEAKER_03: And so, as dark of a time as that was, as much as I would never wish that on anyone, I would not be the woman I am today, sitting here today, had I not gone through it.
• 1:19:20
  SPEAKER_00: Amen.
• 1:19:21
  SPEAKER_00: So I love that for you.
• 1:19:23
  SPEAKER_00: So during this time, are you in the medical field?
• 1:19:28
  SPEAKER_00: You're working?
• 1:19:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:19:29
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, this whole time.
• 1:19:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 1:19:31
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:19:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:19:32
  SPEAKER_03: And then navigating-out as like going to nursing school, wanting to be a nurse, working as an EMT, ER, recovery room.
• 1:19:39
  SPEAKER_03: I was like the very, I wanted to be a flight nurse.
• 1:19:42
  SPEAKER_03: I wanted to be on the helicopters, you know, doing the rescues.
• 1:19:45
  SPEAKER_00: After all the stuff that you experience.
• 1:19:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was already in it before I I was a Jane Doe.
• 1:19:50
  SPEAKER_03: So Wow.
• 1:19:51
  SPEAKER_00: And then and then when you're with the gentleman for those two years, your kids were subject to a lot of that as well.
• 1:19:56
  SPEAKER_00: So they probably also experienced some things, or did you try to keep them?
• 1:20:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, there's no doubt that they did.
• 1:20:02
  SPEAKER_03: One of the things, um, every other weekend the kids went with their dad, and that was the time of of the most dangerous experiences for me.
• 1:20:14
  SPEAKER_03: It seemed like when my kids were around or his kid was around, he would turn into the person that I everyone knew.
• 1:20:22
  SPEAKER_03: If others were around, he didn't show it.
• 1:20:24
  SPEAKER_03: And when no one was around, it it was beyond torture.
• 1:20:29
  SPEAKER_03: And so um, as I've talked to my kids back, um, again, they were younger than five and six.
• 1:20:38
  SPEAKER_03: There's no way that they didn't weren't impacted by what was going on with me.
• 1:20:43
  SPEAKER_03: I was in fight or flight all the time.
• 1:20:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, gone.
• 1:20:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was in it all the time.
• 1:20:48
  SPEAKER_03: I I didn't know which way was up.
• 1:20:51
  SPEAKER_03: I was always trying to make the best decision that would de-escalate the situation, which probably didn't always prioritize myself or maybe even their needs 100% of the time if I was trying to make sure that this person um wasn't gonna be upset.
• 1:21:06
  SPEAKER_03: And I think anytime uh you're navigating around that, it it's it's wild.
• 1:21:11
  SPEAKER_03: Um but yeah, I I think I I just went through that and came out on that other side and went, wow, what like I never could have put on a bingo card that that would be something that I I went through.
• 1:21:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:21:27
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, wow, wow.
• 1:21:29
  SPEAKER_00: And so you met Kevin, how much how like what from that point to 10?
• 1:21:34
  SPEAKER_00: Kevin, you met him.
• 1:21:35
  SPEAKER_03: It was about four years later, but I I took about uh two years, then had the baby, and I met him within six months.
• 1:21:42
  SPEAKER_03: So it was it was within like a two, three year period.
• 1:21:45
  SPEAKER_03: I I um had the babies and then met him right on the backside of that.
• 1:21:50
  SPEAKER_00: Wow, wow, and then and then the babies.
• 1:21:53
  SPEAKER_00: This is your friend and her husband?
• 1:21:56
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, wow.
• 1:21:57
  SPEAKER_03: It by the way, it was his birthday party that I was at the night of this accident.
• 1:22:01
  SPEAKER_03: If that's not a crazy twist and fate, it was his birthday party that I went out for.
• 1:22:05
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:22:06
  SPEAKER_00: So the fact that you live through that and then help them with their their babies years later, and it was her egg and his sperm, or yeah, yeah, and my uterus.
• 1:22:15
  SPEAKER_00: That's amazing.
• 1:22:17
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:22:18
  SPEAKER_03: So I was a gestational carrier, technically.
• 1:22:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, wow, that's so crazy.
• 1:22:23
  SPEAKER_00: That's so it's like technically, it really is their kids.
• 1:22:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was just babysitting, just in a very unique way.
• 1:22:29
  SPEAKER_03: Nine months straight.
• 1:22:30
  SPEAKER_00: Dude, that's freaking awesome.
• 1:22:31
  SPEAKER_00: I absolutely love that.
• 1:22:32
  SPEAKER_00: That's super cool.
• 1:22:34
  SPEAKER_00: So now you met Kevin and you're starting to date.
• 1:22:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, you want to tell tell him a little bit about the story of how you met?
• 1:22:41
  SPEAKER_03: Sure, yeah.
• 1:22:42
  SPEAKER_00: I already know, but y'all don't know.
• 1:22:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we met at a charity event or through uh this charity event that was like a comedy for kids and uh became friends on Facebook.
• 1:22:51
  SPEAKER_03: And it was probably two years later of no talking that um I went on a trip that he just got back from.
• 1:22:58
  SPEAKER_03: And so he messaged me about the trip.
• 1:23:01
  SPEAKER_03: Basically, I went on my first date with him uh within a short window, and um, we've been dating ever since.
• 1:23:08
  SPEAKER_03: I I got to that table, as I said, and he's sitting across from me, and by the end of that that date, that week, I just said, Oh, there you are.
• 1:23:18
  SPEAKER_03: You're that's it.
• 1:23:19
  SPEAKER_03: And we have not stopped dating since.
• 1:23:21
  SPEAKER_00: So uh Wow, that's amazing.
• 1:23:23
  SPEAKER_03: It was instant that's amazing.
• 1:23:24
  SPEAKER_03: I've been single for quite some time.
• 1:23:26
  SPEAKER_00: Which is good.
• 1:23:27
  SPEAKER_00: I think I think we we have to find who we are and take that time for self.
• 1:23:30
  SPEAKER_00: And when you're single, you could do all that.
• 1:23:32
  SPEAKER_03: I loved it.
• 1:23:33
  SPEAKER_03: I loved I was playing with single.
• 1:23:34
  SPEAKER_03: I I wasn't looking, and I think that's always when it finds you, is when you're not looking for it.
• 1:23:39
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, we met, he had four boys and was divorced.
• 1:23:42
  SPEAKER_03: I had two kids and were divorced, and our kids were the exact same age.
• 1:23:46
  SPEAKER_03: And um, over the course of dating, you know, months down the line when when I finally met his kids, um as like a year in whatever, he brings them over to our house and they spend the night.
• 1:24:00
  SPEAKER_03: And the next morning, I'm worried, you know, are they gonna get along with my kids?
• 1:24:05
  SPEAKER_03: I forgot that eight-year-old boys are just friends like that, no matter what.
• 1:24:08
  SPEAKER_03: They're unlike the girls.
• 1:24:09
  SPEAKER_03: We just talked about how girls are in LGBTQ.
• 1:24:11
  SPEAKER_00: Daddy, all the things.
• 1:24:13
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:24:13
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know what's wrong with us, but boys are like cars, sports, balls, done, games, video games, friends, best friends.
• 1:24:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and that's exactly what happened.
• 1:24:23
  SPEAKER_03: They like the next morning, it was 5 a.m.
• 1:24:25
  SPEAKER_03: I heard giggling on the couch, and they were playing Nintendo Switch, and they have been best friends since that day.
• 1:24:29
  SPEAKER_00: That's super sick.
• 1:24:30
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 1:24:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's awesome.
• 1:24:32
  SPEAKER_00: Shout out, young boys, yeah, and it's just less resistance.
• 1:24:35
  SPEAKER_00: It's great that they got along.
• 1:24:36
  SPEAKER_00: That's easy peasy.
• 1:24:37
  SPEAKER_00: So that's super cool.
• 1:24:38
  SPEAKER_03: And even to this day, they they they they talk daily, if not weekly, and they live different states and all that.
• 1:24:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, dude, that's sick.
• 1:24:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's their best friends, and so our kids just got along, we got along, it just clicked.
• 1:24:51
  SPEAKER_03: We got married um about three years into it.
• 1:24:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and yeah, so Kevin wasn't even on, I would say, a spiritual journey during that.
• 1:25:01
  SPEAKER_03: As I said, he when I met him, he was pretty he he had been in the church a lot longer than I had.
• 1:25:08
  SPEAKER_00: He had uh been in the still in during this time, right?
• 1:25:10
  SPEAKER_00: When you first met?
• 1:25:11
  SPEAKER_03: No, he already got out?
• 1:25:13
  SPEAKER_03: Left, but uh more recently, like within the three years of leaving.
• 1:25:17
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 1:25:17
  SPEAKER_03: So he was like he was like a 36-year-old man when he he finally was like, I don't think I'm doing this anymore.
• 1:25:24
  SPEAKER_03: And it was around the time he got divorced and um and had left the church.
• 1:25:29
  SPEAKER_03: And so I didn't push him either way.
• 1:25:31
  SPEAKER_03: We didn't there was no if he wanted to go to church, I would have let him.
• 1:25:36
  SPEAKER_03: If he wanted to, you know, do it, but we didn't really talk spirituality or anything.
• 1:25:41
  SPEAKER_00: And did you even like think to yourself that you were even on a spiritual journey at all?
• 1:25:46
  SPEAKER_00: You did you did you kind of had a knowing already the whole time after the the near death?
• 1:25:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I I the knowing in me was that I was a spiritual being living a human experience.
• 1:25:56
  SPEAKER_03: Got it.
• 1:25:56
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 1:25:57
  SPEAKER_03: So I just operated from that place without like announcing it.
• 1:26:02
  SPEAKER_03: It just was like here I am.
• 1:26:04
  SPEAKER_03: I listened and uh did it, but I didn't push there, we had a lot of deep conversations, but it was never asking him to be anything different than what he was.
• 1:26:15
  SPEAKER_03: And then if I could describe Kevin, he is a very introverted, uh quiet guy.
• 1:26:21
  SPEAKER_03: Once you get him one-on-one, he'll talk to you.
• 1:26:23
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, he also had a bot a bunch of like little OCDs and anxieties and quirks and fears and all this stuff.
• 1:26:33
  SPEAKER_03: He wouldn't watch a Halloween movie because he just didn't like it.
• 1:26:36
  SPEAKER_03: Like he was very sensitive, yeah.
• 1:26:38
  SPEAKER_03: Um, in those ways, and and very strong and all this in other ways, but there were these little things that I could see and hear.
• 1:26:48
  SPEAKER_03: And um in 2018, his dad passed away.
• 1:26:52
  SPEAKER_02: Oh God bless.
• 1:26:55
  SPEAKER_03: And that was one of the most challenging and beautiful human experiences we have had to date.
• 1:27:01
  SPEAKER_03: We had the privilege of taking care of his dad in the last two weeks uh before him, being there during his passing.
• 1:27:08
  SPEAKER_03: As I said, um he got to see me in my work, he got to see me caring for someone who is dead and dying, and how I do that and the spiritual way I bring that in.
• 1:27:24
  SPEAKER_00: And you so you've already been doing this for a little while during by this time.
• 1:27:27
  SPEAKER_03: I've been a volunteer for years, yeah.
• 1:27:29
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you've already been a part of it, understood.
• 1:27:32
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, and he's never really seen it, and then this is his first time.
• 1:27:35
  SPEAKER_03: Seeing me with he'd never been around death and dying the way I had.
• 1:27:39
  SPEAKER_03: I'd been grown up.
• 1:27:40
  SPEAKER_03: My mom's actually a home health and hospice nurse.
• 1:27:42
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my shout out to that.
• 1:27:44
  SPEAKER_03: She went, she went to become a nurse at 58 years old.
• 1:27:46
  SPEAKER_03: She put herself through school and graduated at 58.
• 1:27:49
  SPEAKER_00: Shout out moms.
• 1:27:50
  SPEAKER_03: She's uh 69 and still practicing as a nurse right now.
• 1:27:53
  SPEAKER_03: Let's go.
• 1:27:54
  SPEAKER_03: She's just she's amazing, but um but she's always every neighbor that.
• 1:28:00
  SPEAKER_03: Needed something, or was that they were at our house.
• 1:28:03
  SPEAKER_03: If it was a grandparent, a great aunt, I can't tell you the number of people that were dead or dying around me as a child, and so it's really funny to think about that it was so comfortable for me.
• 1:28:14
  SPEAKER_03: But Kevin hadn't had those experiences.
• 1:28:15
  SPEAKER_03: I think a lot of humans don't have those experiences until your parents.
• 1:28:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's true.
• 1:28:20
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so his dad passes.
• 1:28:23
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and that opened up a lot of dialogue, but it also opened up a lot of grief.
• 1:28:29
  SPEAKER_03: And what I witnessed Kevin falling into was like more fear, more angst, more things.
• 1:28:36
  SPEAKER_03: And so again, he wasn't seeking anything out.
• 1:28:40
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but if it makes sense, I'm happy to tell a little uh cut version of his story before he comes.
• 1:28:46
  SPEAKER_03: But but a few years later in 2021, everybody knows we kind of all got real quiet in 2020.
• 1:28:53
  SPEAKER_03: And whatever your things were that you were dealing with seemed to come out and make you face them.
• 1:28:57
  SPEAKER_03: And um, you know, my friends, if they loved a little sip of alcohol, maybe found themselves sipping a little bit more and had to reconcile that.
• 1:29:05
  SPEAKER_03: If you, you know, whatever it was you were going through, I feel like it enhanced it.
• 1:29:09
  SPEAKER_03: And for Kevin exacerbated for sure.
• 1:29:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and for Kevin, it was his grief and anxieties, and those um came out a lot louder.
• 1:29:18
  SPEAKER_03: And we had gone on a trip, just the two of us, um, and we were meeting up with friends and had gone to Joshua Tree.
• 1:29:26
  SPEAKER_03: And we had hung out earlier that night and we were getting ready to go out for the night, and Kevin started hysterically crying.
• 1:29:35
  SPEAKER_03: And as I said, Kevin's a lot of things, but stoic is one of them, chill is a lot of them.
• 1:29:41
  SPEAKER_03: I can be like this with my energy, and he just stays right there.
• 1:29:45
  SPEAKER_03: He's just consistent.
• 1:29:46
  SPEAKER_03: When I say, Oh, there you are, there's not a better way to describe Kevin.
• 1:29:50
  SPEAKER_03: He's just solid and consistent and amazing.
• 1:29:54
  SPEAKER_02: I love it.
• 1:29:55
  SPEAKER_03: And so when I see him in what I will describe as a hysterical panic attack, wow.
• 1:30:00
  SPEAKER_03: I mean just he cannot get words out, he cannot form a sentence, he is hysterically crying.
• 1:30:07
  SPEAKER_03: And so I start in my own way, doing some energy work, calming him down, you know, breathing with him, co-regulating with him.
• 1:30:18
  SPEAKER_03: And um when he could finally talk, he said, My dad's in the doorway and he's trying to talk to me.
• 1:30:27
  SPEAKER_03: And I can tell you that I don't know that I believed those words coming out of Kevin's mouth.
• 1:30:32
  SPEAKER_03: It wasn't something, even after all my experiences and all the spiritual things I had experienced in 20 years and my belief in what was possible, still could not compute what my husband was saying.
• 1:30:45
  SPEAKER_03: And me and a friend basically uh calmed him down and got him regulated.
• 1:30:53
  SPEAKER_03: And I said, why don't you ask your dad what he's trying to say?
• 1:30:56
  SPEAKER_03: And at that moment, it was more about just getting Kevin to calm down, not about believing whether or not this person was in the room.
• 1:31:03
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but what I witnessed over the next four hours was my husband having a conversation with his dad.
• 1:31:11
  SPEAKER_00: This is out loud?
• 1:31:12
  SPEAKER_00: Out loud.
• 1:31:13
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, he is auditorily talking to somebody that I cannot see or hear.
• 1:31:18
  SPEAKER_03: And the conversation is dialoguing in a way, yeah.
• 1:31:23
  SPEAKER_03: But I know, dad.
• 1:31:24
  SPEAKER_03: Remember that one time when I was seven?
• 1:31:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that was the song we listened to.
• 1:31:28
  SPEAKER_03: You're right, dad.
• 1:31:30
  SPEAKER_03: What about this, dad?
• 1:31:31
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm trying to make sense of this, and probably about an hour or so in, I remember being like, Bob, if this is you, if this is real, like tell me Kevin's okay.
• 1:31:45
  SPEAKER_03: I think I was so anxious that my husband wasn't okay.
• 1:31:49
  SPEAKER_03: Um, that I just was like, Is this really you?
• 1:31:53
  SPEAKER_03: And as I mentioned, I was with Kevin's dad when he passed.
• 1:31:57
  SPEAKER_03: I was part of the care team that took care of him for the along with his siblings, and there was a whole group of us.
• 1:32:03
  SPEAKER_03: But really, in those last days, it was me and Kevin in the room, and I was in there almost 24 hours sleeping in the room with him.
• 1:32:11
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 1:32:12
  SPEAKER_03: And when it was time for him to go, when I knew it was time, um, I whispered in his ear, thank you for gifting me your son.
• 1:32:22
  SPEAKER_03: And then called the family in, gave him his last dose of morphine and called the family in to say it's time.
• 1:32:30
  SPEAKER_03: And in this moment with Kevin where he's sitting there talking to who he's saying is his father, I'm going, Is this Bob?
• 1:32:37
  SPEAKER_03: Can this be him?
• 1:32:39
  SPEAKER_03: Is this really happening right now?
• 1:32:41
  SPEAKER_03: And Kevin, who's laying next to me on the bed, turns his head to me like this and he goes, My dad says, Thanks for gifting me your son.
• 1:32:50
  SPEAKER_03: And I melted.
• 1:32:52
  SPEAKER_03: I think I spent 30 minutes totally zoomed out and in my body and in my own PTSD and in my own like thing going, his dad's here.
• 1:33:02
  SPEAKER_03: He's talking to his dad.
• 1:33:04
  SPEAKER_03: How is he talking?
• 1:33:05
  SPEAKER_03: How is Kevin talking to his dad?
• 1:33:07
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 1:33:07
  SPEAKER_03: How is his dad?
• 1:33:08
  SPEAKER_03: Why is his dad here?
• 1:33:10
  SPEAKER_03: What is happening?
• 1:33:11
  SPEAKER_03: And and so the beauty of this uh story is uh his dad essentially told him that he has these gifts.
• 1:33:21
  SPEAKER_03: He's always had these gifts, that it has been his fears and anxiety stopping him from using these gifts, and that he is meant to help others with these gifts.
• 1:33:35
  SPEAKER_01: Beautiful.
• 1:33:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um and at one point his dad he said it felt like there were these switches in his body that were turned on, of like trauma, anger, sadness, neglect, you know, and all these things that we experience as children that you know, all this.
• 1:33:50
  SPEAKER_03: And his dad goes, and he said it felt like they turned off, and all of a sudden, like there was flow in his body, just like it's like flow.
• 1:34:01
  SPEAKER_03: And his dad goes, Did you feel that?
• 1:34:03
  SPEAKER_03: What did you experience that?
• 1:34:05
  SPEAKER_03: And he said, Yeah, and he goes, Go do that for other people.
• 1:34:08
  SPEAKER_03: I that is what your calling is is to go do that for other people.
• 1:34:12
  SPEAKER_00: Beautiful.
• 1:34:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and so we left that event uh on the drive home from Joshua Tree.
• 1:34:17
  SPEAKER_03: We recorded on audio everything that we experienced that night.
• 1:34:21
  SPEAKER_03: Like we rehashed it to each other because it was so shocking.
• 1:34:25
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, but then your dad said this, and then you did this.
• 1:34:28
  SPEAKER_03: And Kevin got home and we made appointments with psychologists and psychiatrists.
• 1:34:33
  SPEAKER_03: Um, because when that happened, it was like a light switch went on that wouldn't go off.
• 1:34:40
  SPEAKER_03: He couldn't go out to a restaurant without hearing, seeing, and feeling things that were there.
• 1:34:47
  SPEAKER_03: And um so we went to a psychologist and psychiatrist because my husband was here hearing and seeing things that weren't there suddenly.
• 1:34:55
  SPEAKER_03: And luckily we got referred to, we had psychiatrists that were like, I don't believe in this, but you're not crazy.
• 1:35:03
  SPEAKER_03: But let me refer you to somebody who maybe can give you more insight that messes in this.
• 1:35:08
  SPEAKER_03: And Kevin ended up with a 30-year psychologist who had lost his sight.
• 1:35:13
  SPEAKER_03: And when he lost his sight, um, he gained his own sixth sense.
• 1:35:17
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 1:35:17
  SPEAKER_03: So he helped Kevin navigate past the human fears as a psychologist, unwind all that, and be able to understand what this gift was and how he was going to use it.
• 1:35:28
  SPEAKER_03: And within a year, Kevin started doing readings, and six years later were over 600 readings, and um that's the work we're in now.
• 1:35:39
  SPEAKER_03: That's I never would have guessed at 24 that I'd be in this work with a husband to do this work.
• 1:35:44
  SPEAKER_03: That that was not in the in the psyche or the plan.
• 1:35:47
  SPEAKER_03: I was a software executive, right?
• 1:35:49
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's so interesting.
• 1:35:51
  SPEAKER_00: Honing in his gift so he can have the tools to navigate that and to be able to do what he does to make that happen.
• 1:36:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I did hear that most recently he's now full time because I know that you work in corporate America, and then he had his job, and he's now doing full-time, and you're both pouring into him.
• 1:36:10
  SPEAKER_00: And then eventually you'll, yeah, I heard you congratulations, did get one of your dream opportunities in the corporate sector, which is awesome, you know, so that you get to be able to have that opportunity.
• 1:36:21
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and that's beautiful that he's doing that in such a big way.
• 1:36:24
  SPEAKER_00: And it was funny, not funny, but they uh first time I met him because my wife met all you and did all the things and whatever else.
• 1:36:32
  SPEAKER_00: And the next thing up, I'm just like, sure, I'll do this photo, whatever video, and then they just like, oh yeah, you interview, here you go, like looking into his eyes and asking him questions and all this type of stuff.
• 1:36:45
  SPEAKER_00: And uh it was beautiful co-creation moment to be able to like have that happen, but um, but it was cool to like because Melissa, she tells me little things, and this, that, and that, and the other thing, and and I it's nice to sit down and have an intimate moment to hear all this to really understand and all the things, and so I'm trying to think.
• 1:37:06
  SPEAKER_00: I want him on, and he'll he'll share more stories and what have you.
• 1:37:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, but as he's been going through this process and and serving the 600 plus people, how has this opened up your gifts and gave you clarity for you to be able to navigate what's your role in all of this to be able to do and to be able to serve and support?
• 1:37:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think it's it's interesting because as he got his gifts, he got a directive that said, This is what you're supposed to do with it.
• 1:37:35
  SPEAKER_03: And I feel like as my life has unfolded, it's been these big moments, but like these moments that have not been as clear.
• 1:37:44
  SPEAKER_03: And watching Kevin do this work, and um I'll just say he he has all the gifts.
• 1:37:53
  SPEAKER_03: He can see, he can hear, he can feel, he can remote view, he can uh do medium work.
• 1:37:59
  SPEAKER_03: And so watching what's possible opens up for you what you're keeping suppressed.
• 1:38:08
  SPEAKER_03: I think I now have a language, as I said, around my knowing.
• 1:38:11
  SPEAKER_03: I I'm Claire cognizant, and I've walked around life as a claire cognizant human using that intuitive, um, psychic uh, as you if you want to call it, gift to navigate through the world.
• 1:38:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um and I think, you know, for a Kevin, his gift it's not as been clear.
• 1:38:33
  SPEAKER_03: It's been years of of finding clarity in exactly what he's meant to do with it.
• 1:38:37
  SPEAKER_03: But for me, I've come to realize that and for him too, I am my gift.
• 1:38:45
  SPEAKER_03: My story is my gift, my life experience is my gift.
• 1:38:50
  SPEAKER_03: And sure uh you could come to me and we could do coaching, you could come to me and I could do energy work, you could come to me and I could do these things, but I haven't tried to build my life around it, but more incorporate that into every day.
• 1:39:04
  SPEAKER_03: My team that sits in my office, we talk about into what does your intuition say?
• 1:39:11
  SPEAKER_03: I develop that in people.
• 1:39:13
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 1:39:14
  SPEAKER_03: I make sure that they walk away feeling embodied in their own gifts, whether you work for me or that.
• 1:39:20
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't talk spirituality, I don't talk religion, I apply these things to life so that I hopefully am the embodiment of what I learned.
• 1:39:32
  SPEAKER_03: Not perfect.
• 1:39:33
  SPEAKER_03: I make mistakes, I get PMS, I uh get perimenopause, I get all the things, but it's more about learning to be it so that if the opportunity came and I do do speaking engagements and I do these things that I can have integrity about who I am and what I'm doing.
• 1:39:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um but yes, it's given me permission, it's given me a language, it's given me someone who I can say Kevin.
• 1:40:07
  SPEAKER_03: I got a really hard question for you.
• 1:40:09
  SPEAKER_03: I have a really hard day that I went through and a really hard time when I was four years old, and I know things happen then.
• 1:40:15
  SPEAKER_03: Can you remote view into that time and tell me in your words and spirit world what happened?
• 1:40:23
  SPEAKER_03: To be validated in your truth.
• 1:40:26
  SPEAKER_03: I think a lot of us vic and I hate to say victim, but a lot of us who have experienced either traumatic things or bad things or all this have easily told ourselves that that can't all be true, or maybe I made something up, or maybe I embellished it.
• 1:40:44
  SPEAKER_03: And I think what was really important is I drove to your studio today.
• 1:40:50
  SPEAKER_03: I asked my guides, my ancestors, and my spirit guides to give me to only allow me to speak in integrity, to only say the truth, and let that truth be the most important truth, not only for me to say, for me, but that those receiving it can hear the most important thing.
• 1:41:10
  SPEAKER_03: And I think that just having Kevin and you know, six days a week, people are in and out of our house.
• 1:41:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I watch them come in in pain and I watch them leave so much lighter, and it's just like this gets to be a part of life too.
• 1:41:26
  SPEAKER_03: This isn't this isn't so far outside of us, all of us have intuition.
• 1:41:31
  SPEAKER_03: All Kevin always had this, but he lived 40 plus years, 50 plus actually plus years not using it, and I just think there's no better time.
• 1:41:45
  SPEAKER_03: It was divinely timed for him to receive it when he did.
• 1:41:49
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, and it's all of our divine timing.
• 1:41:52
  SPEAKER_03: I I'll know when I know, and I'll open that door when it's time to open that door.
• 1:41:57
  SPEAKER_00: That's absolutely beautiful, and um it's uh yeah, it's it's a crazy existence that we live, and it's such an amazing, beautiful roller coaster that you just have to ride and just be open to.
• 1:42:12
  SPEAKER_00: I like the idea of the intuition.
• 1:42:15
  SPEAKER_00: I think that is something we can all relate to in it not being super like woo-woo, spiritual, whatever, because we all have intuition.
• 1:42:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and that's like trusting your gut, or you know, like this person may not have the best intentions, or it seems like they have some type of alternative modems, or whatever the case may be, and like I'm going in this direction, and um I could definitely relate to that.
• 1:42:39
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting from the research that I've done and this existence that we've been subcumbed to for so many years, it's like once they said in a bunch of the books I've read, by the time you get to 20 to 30 to 50 is when you really start to get more intuitive, and that's when you can you can break through and have like gifts like Kevin does, and um also like you as well.
• 1:43:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it's interesting how the foods and the lights and just everything the Wi-Fi, the Bluetooth, the the social media, the pornography, all that stuff.
• 1:43:15
  SPEAKER_03: The movie you watch, the music you listen to.
• 1:43:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 1:43:17
  SPEAKER_03: My dang Mormon parents were right the entire time.
• 1:43:20
  SPEAKER_00: Shout out to them.
• 1:43:21
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and it and it takes you down a level to the point where you know you're you find yourself by the time you hit your 50s, you're like on medication and this and that, and and your fear and the anxiety and all this type of stuff.
• 1:43:34
  SPEAKER_00: And so, so it's beautiful to have a co-creation moment with you today, to be able to just bless whoever's out there that needs to hear this message, that has a fear, that has the anxiety, that needs to go deeper into the opportunity of what's it trying to tell you?
• 1:43:50
  SPEAKER_03: That's was Kevin's chat.
• 1:43:52
  SPEAKER_03: What was that fear always trying to tell you?
• 1:43:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, because that's the other side of freedom, right?
• 1:43:59
  SPEAKER_03: There was this freedom on the other side of the fear, but he had to move through it to get there.
• 1:44:03
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 1:44:04
  SPEAKER_00: So wow.
• 1:44:05
  SPEAKER_00: And so just so you also all know, you know, we're available, they're available.
• 1:44:10
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna put all the links down below.
• 1:44:12
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I know you guys are you guys have a website, I think there's a name.
• 1:44:16
  SPEAKER_00: So what's the company?
• 1:44:17
  SPEAKER_00: What's the website?
• 1:44:17
  SPEAKER_00: I want to hear a little bit more about like how can they connect with y'all?
• 1:44:20
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:44:21
  SPEAKER_03: So uh Kevin offers online or in-person readings.
• 1:44:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um, like I said, six days a week.
• 1:44:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:44:28
  SPEAKER_03: And uh you can connect with us on social media at your soulfulconnections.com, or I guess in our Instagram is just at your soulful connections.
• 1:44:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:44:38
  SPEAKER_03: And then um soulfulconnections.com and you can book time.
• 1:44:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I also do little 15-minute consultations with people all the time and uh resets, but mostly it's it's to book with Kevin and to get that experience.
• 1:44:53
  SPEAKER_03: We also hold monthly events at our house, which is sound baths and group channeling, love it, um, and readings that way.
• 1:45:00
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, we just are really enjoying this space, and and I think it's most impressive to watch somebody you love step into their calling and purpose.
• 1:45:13
  SPEAKER_03: And it is such a beautiful thing to witness, and it's been my favorite thing to witness from him because it's almost a different version that of him, and his mom has said it, his siblings have said it like you're different, you're different, you just are and probably angelic and just uh amazing and knowing, and just all that's that's that's amazing.
• 1:45:36
  SPEAKER_00: I I I absolutely love from a different perspective, quick side note lift off agents teams from the Philippines, primarily out there.
• 1:45:46
  SPEAKER_00: And I had a calling to be out there, I've been out there multiple times, and there's something about working with someone to be able to show them something that they've never even thought that they could see before, like the Kevin story, and then for them to be able to come on the other side and be this beautiful being, be beautiful, just human being and and their family and everything to say, like, yeah, you are different.
• 1:46:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I have my work wife, her name's Vitz, been working for six and a half years, and she's just got her driver's license, bought a car, like like redoing her parents' house.
• 1:46:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, she's basically like my CEO in the Philippines, and she's broke through all of these things, and it's just so cool to see it, and you're like, wow, like I would have never thought.
• 1:46:31
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just like that's all you.
• 1:46:33
  SPEAKER_00: You did it.
• 1:46:33
  SPEAKER_00: Congratulations! Like, I love that for you.
• 1:46:36
  SPEAKER_00: So, so I can relate to that in a in a perspective of the corporate side for lift off agent that sponsors our show.
• 1:46:42
  SPEAKER_00: So, shout out to the the Philippines team.
• 1:46:44
  SPEAKER_00: So, just absolutely amazing.
• 1:46:46
  SPEAKER_00: And for this segment, I can't believe we're already like an hour and almost 50 minutes in.
• 1:46:52
  SPEAKER_00: I I want to turn it over to you and give you an opportunity to say be whatever.
• 1:46:59
  SPEAKER_00: So, if you were, you know, the host and I gave you the mic, which you already have, but is there anything that like maybe, you know, you talked a little bit earlier about shadow work or something that you want to talk about or whatever?
• 1:47:12
  SPEAKER_00: I I'm just curious what comes up for you.
• 1:47:15
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I think even as we were talking about this, these themes kept coming into me, and I kept hearing them uh uh over and over.
• 1:47:23
  SPEAKER_03: And I I think what's most important about what I took away from this whole experience is is a little bit of a combination.
• 1:47:31
  SPEAKER_03: It's that we've said it, all these experiences and all these things that you're having as a human are for you and not happening to you.
• 1:47:43
  SPEAKER_03: And they are made if you feel triggered, if you feel angry, if you feel upset, that's just teaching you that something's there that you still need to work through.
• 1:47:53
  SPEAKER_03: These things that are happening are are it's almost like we get this like inner book where you say we don't know what life's about, but we actually have this inner um knowing that we we can connect to.
• 1:48:06
  SPEAKER_03: I also want to say that any judgments we put on this human experience um are just that judgments that when we die or as we die, I'm confident, um, and I don't even love the word death, as we graduate and transition from this world, um and you get to look back, you're not going to look back in judgment.
• 1:48:35
  SPEAKER_03: You're going to see all the things that you did that had impact.
• 1:48:41
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and if you can spend time every day in that gratitude for the things that are happening well and gratitude for those things, that asshole boyfriend that tried to tear you apart and break you down, and you realize, well, most people like to learn lessons the easy way.
• 1:49:03
  SPEAKER_03: I signed up to learn to be punched repeatedly until I was like, wait, is that the lesson?
• 1:49:10
  SPEAKER_03: And and to appreciate that in yourself, to to see that as a a gift in a way, and that, and that you can give I I spent many years in pain and misery giving him the power that he had taken from me before I was able to see that you can take that back and use that as a catalyst for for your life.
• 1:49:35
  SPEAKER_03: And then I think the last thing is that there's nothing to fear in death.
• 1:49:42
  SPEAKER_03: And if I could tell one people it is the greatest adventure you will ever have, and not because we should rush for it or seek it.
• 1:49:51
  SPEAKER_03: Um, although there are days where I daydream about how beautiful that experience was and how I can't wait to be there again.
• 1:50:01
  SPEAKER_03: And have it.
• 1:50:02
  SPEAKER_03: It was better than any high you could seek in this life, better than the most joyous moment of your life.
• 1:50:09
  SPEAKER_03: It is everything we could dream of and more.
• 1:50:13
  SPEAKER_03: And we yet we so many of us spend so much of our life in fear of that day.
• 1:50:20
  SPEAKER_03: And I would just say don't fear it, but live as if that day could come in any second.
• 1:50:29
  SPEAKER_03: And I think at 24, if I could summarize what my death taught me, it was how to live and how important it is to live.
• 1:50:40
  SPEAKER_03: And so I think that ultimately is the summation of the gift I was given by dying.
• 1:50:49
  SPEAKER_00: That's absolutely beautiful.
• 1:50:50
  SPEAKER_00: The download that I just got was is like your gift is to gift others from the perspective of death isn't what we were told it was or what it was supposed to mean, and how they use it to be the thing that they try to use to control all of us.
• 1:51:08
  SPEAKER_00: And it's not something that we even need to be controlled.
• 1:51:11
  SPEAKER_00: It it's just a part of the existence and the process.
• 1:51:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember in my 20s, I um I I wrestled with it for a while, and this whole why am I here?
• 1:51:23
  SPEAKER_00: What is this?
• 1:51:23
  SPEAKER_00: All these questions.
• 1:51:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I do remember that I had a moment where I um my mom, I remember she's like, so you're about to get off my healthcare.
• 1:51:32
  SPEAKER_00: So if you get off my healthcare, just want to make sure that you see the doctor, whatever else.
• 1:51:36
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, I uh I was with my I moved out, was with my girlfriend, and it hit me, and it was like a massive panic attack.
• 1:51:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember trying to go in the shower, and I called my mom.
• 1:51:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I need that therapist, and it was like fragmented, couldn't think, overanalyzing everything, hyperventilating, and it took me about a year to reground myself, listening to calm music, regrounding myself, and just like and and it was almost like I feel like my awakenings have always been a very gradual, slow process.
• 1:52:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a Pisces for frame of reference.
• 1:52:14
  SPEAKER_00: And Kevin both for frame of reference, he is yes, Pisces are amazing, um and of the zodiac.
• 1:52:20
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah and so and so I think that was a part of the catalyst of of my gift, and and um and I just appreciate you sharing and and co-creating and taking this space, and I appreciate you all for listening because it's um beautiful to be able to have this opportunity and to be able to just take a second and stop the scroll, stop all the things for a second, and if someone lasted two hours, you're a real one.
• 1:52:48
  SPEAKER_03: I don't even listen to myself for this long, so yeah.
• 1:52:51
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I think that's that's what you know, when you think about meditation, right?
• 1:52:56
  SPEAKER_00: Or um sitting quiet with self for a second, doing breath work, right?
• 1:53:02
  SPEAKER_00: It it's if you pay for a massage or you're gonna go do a modality, whether it's sound bath or it's gonna be Reiki session, you're getting that second of bliss.
• 1:53:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel like the journey that we just went on for the last past two hours was meditation.
• 1:53:19
  SPEAKER_00: This was a co-creation meditation opportunity to transcend and to raise consciousness from different perspectives for whoever's watching, and for you that took the time to do that for yourself.
• 1:53:34
  SPEAKER_00: Congratulations.
• 1:53:36
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, thank you.
• 1:53:37
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely beautiful for having me.
• 1:53:39
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for being here.
• 1:53:41
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you for watching today's episode of the liftoff experience, as it is our intention to be able to help you have more liftoff in your life, personally, professionally, and spiritually.
• 1:53:50
  SPEAKER_00: That's why we bring on amazing individuals and amazing episodes to be able to help you do as such.
• 1:53:56
  SPEAKER_00: New episodes come out every single Saturday.
• 1:53:58
  SPEAKER_00: Make sure to subscribe, hit the notification bell, comment below with one thing that you took away from the episode.
• 1:54:03
  SPEAKER_00: And if you have a compelling story that you wish to share and you want to come to Phoenix, Arizona, Gilbert, Arizona, specifically, to our recording studio, we'd love to have you on an episode.
• 1:54:15
  SPEAKER_00: And a big thank you to liftoff agent who does the thumbnail, writes the copy, does all the content for our show behind the scenes.
• 1:54:22
  SPEAKER_00: That's all I do is find guests, point and shoot, and have a good time.
• 1:54:26
  SPEAKER_00: So thanks so much to lift off agent team.
• 1:54:28
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for staying to the end of the episode.
• 1:54:30
  SPEAKER_00: And just do us a favor and like, subscribe, give us your feedback so we can get this out to more individuals.
• 1:54:35
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, you can share this with someone else that you think that should see it.
• 1:54:38
  SPEAKER_00: Because at the end of the day, we all have to help each other and serve each other to have more liftoff.
• 1:54:42
  SPEAKER_00: And now our YouTube channel, you can go ahead and see all of our other videos.
• 1:54:47
  SPEAKER_00: If you're listening to this, just go to the liftoff experience on YouTube.
• 1:54:50
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're watching this, then you can see on the screen that we have lots of episodes that you can take a look at and you can watch today to be able to go deeper with different subject matters to help you have more liftoff in your life.
• 1:55:02
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much for your time.
• 1:55:03
  SPEAKER_00: I appreciate you.
• 1:55:04
  SPEAKER_00: God bless.
• 1:55:04
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see you all on the next one.