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NFL teams to root for (and a few not to root for) · Unicorn Football Talk

• Emily: Hillary, the NFL season is here. Almost. Hilary: Almost Almost. Emily: I can't wait. We are going to get you ready for the NFL season by giving you some teams to root for and against, in case you're looking for some teams to root for and against. I just want to remind everybody, we did a college episode on this too. This is all in good fun. This isn't real hate for the most part. you know, if you're Team is on this list. It's okay. I know some people hate the Seahawks, and I'm good with that. I get it. It's just sports. Hilary: It is just sports, but hey, the first game is coming up. You gonna be there? Emily: I'll be there. We're opening a Super Bowl champions on a Wednesday, which is really weird. but yeah, I couldn't be more excited. Hilary: Yeah, that is cool. And I guess the Wednesday night game is to accommodate that the Rams 49ers are Thursday in Australia, which is really Thursday morning for us. Wednesday morning for us. I haven't checked how that time change works yet. you bet. You bet. Emily: Haven't checked the time, but I'm planning to watch it. I hope. I yeah, I hope it's not during work. But all right. Well, before we dive in, I looked up what teams have never been to the Super Bowl or won a Super Bowl. So there are four teams that have never been to the Super Bowl. The Cleveland Browns, the Detroit Lions, the Jacksonville Jaguars, and the Houston Texans. And then there are a bunch of teams that have been but never won. So Hilary: the heartbreak teams. Emily: the heartbreak. The Buffalo Bills four times. The Minnesota Vikings have been four times. The Bengals three times. The Falcons two times. The Panthers two times. then there's three teams that have gone once and not won. The Chargers, the Titans, and the Cardinals. So, just in case you want to pick one of those teams, it's I it would be hard. Yeah, I mean, I think Hilary: Okay. Sho show them some love. Yeah. Yeah. Emily: it would be hard to be a fan base that's never been to the Super Bowl. It's a little bit easier, I feel like, to root for teams that haven't been or haven't won the Super Bowl. So let's start with the negative, the four teams to root against. I'll give you a couple and then I'll punt it over to you. All right. Hilary: Okay. Yeah. Sounds good. Sounds good. Emily: My number one team to root against consistently is Dallas. the dubbing of them as America's team has always rubbed me the wrong way. And I don't know if it's true anymore. they rubbed me the wrong way. also their owner, Jerry Jones. I mean, what can you say? Like he's not likable, is he? Hilary: He's not really very likable. I think his ego gets in the way. Emily: Yes, he's the owner and he's the general manager, which like you can't fire yourself, right, if you're not doing a good job. So, but his ego, you know, he thinks that he can be the general manager, and I believe that that's what's preventing the team from getting better. Also, he is famous for loving headlines. he prioritizes drama, like he loves the holdouts. Like last year when Micah Parsons was holding out, he loved that and he was stoking that. he delays contract negotiations for key players and that creates more headlines. So I I just I don't like Dallas, Hillary. Hilary: They're not my favorite either. Did you see the article about Jerry's son? I think it was in the Athletic or ESPN in the last couple of weeks, Steven Jones about when he takes over the team and his attitude is not quite the same as his dad's. And actually I've just looked it up. It's in the New York Times. Worth reading if you didn't. Emily: Yeah, I s I haven't read it. I read the headline. I think they're gonna be much better off with Steven Jones. That that's his name, right? Steven. Hilary: Yeah, yeah. Emily: Yeah, I I kind of hope they delay it as long as they can, handing it off because I think that they're not gonna win another Super Bowl with Jerry Jones as the GM. So they might be more likable w after Jerry's gone. I don't know. so my second team. is the Rams. I mean, I would say the whole NFC West division that isn't the Seahawks, but I picked out the Rams especially. what Hilary: can you buy a bigger roster? I mean, really. Emily: Yeah, I think that's it. Like they are the darlings right now, right? But it reminds me so much of back in 2011, the Eagles did this whole dream team roster. And Vince Young, who was backup quarterback, signed with the Eagles and he named them the dream team. They just signed all these star players. They went eight and eight and they missed the playoffs. So I'm hoping for a similar situation here. they have an all-star roster of names and people are just crowning them the Super Bowl winners as if we don't even need to play the season. Ugh. Hilary: It's a long season. Things happen, injuries, and any given Sunday, any, you know, bad weather, their special teams was not up to the task last year. Not wishing not wishing them a dream team season. Emily: Yeah, let's just No, so I guess I'm rooting for the forty Niners in the home opener, sadly, which is really hard, but that's who I'm rooting for. All right, give me a couple. Hilary: Okay. my number one root against team is the Las Vegas Raiders. the owner, Emily: Okay. Hilary: Al Davis, and then son Mark. I just think they're the most meddling, dysfunctional owners ever, maybe besides Jerry Jones. you know, Al in his time had endless lawsuits and feuds with players and owners and the NFL itself. He moved the team, I don't know how many times, Oakland, LA, Oakland. He kind of cultivated this rebel attitude like it was them against the world. And he actually coined the phrase, just win, baby. which that's going a ways back. But Mark inherited the team in 2011. He moved the team to Las Vegas. There's been allegations about hostile workplace environments. There's the fallout from the John Gruden email scandals. And I just think Mark is responsible for the continuous churn of coaches and staff. They've had six head coaches or interim coaches in the past six years, I think. I just there's no stability there. and Tom Brady now, a minority stake owner, and I don't like the conflict of interest between his ownership and the broadcast career that he's pursuing. I I don't Emily: I don't like that either. Hilary: I think their fans are obnoxious, aggressive, and loud and their fashion. Like, come on, really, are you a pirate? It's Halloween. Like, what is it with the Raiders and their fan gear? I just can't get behind it. Emily: mean their their uniform's pretty good. You're talking about their fan. Okay. Okay. Got it. Got it. Hilary: Yep. I'm talking about their fans. Yeah. Yeah. And the last point of that is I really do like Max Crosby as a player. And I Emily: Same. Yeah. Hilary: think he deserves better. So Raiders are on the do not cheer for them list for me right at the top. Emily: Yeah, it's too bad Max Crosby didn't Hilary: Yeah. Emily: get out. He was supposed to be traded and he's back. So yeah, he's the only thing I like. Well, Hilary: Yeah. Yeah. Emily: I kinda like Mendoza though. But I'm rooting against them too. Hilary: Yeah, it's interesting because we're talking about rooting against, and I find myself in a lot of these cases making my choices not really on individual players, more on dysfunction of management and coaches and the leadership of the team sometimes. and that's true for my next one too. It's the Cleveland Browns. I have so much empathy for the Cleveland fans. I think they deserve so much better than the what they're getting. But I can't in good conscience cheer for that team right now. I can't get past the management and organization decisions. Deshaun Watson, of course, is a whole thing I think when the fans are booing their starting quarterback, that's a problem. And when the starting quarterback reacts by saying it's the fans' problem and he feels disrespected, that's even a bigger red flag and a bigger problem. I think they've got a constant coach turn there and they're just always looking for a quick fix. And my last thing, I can't get past they traded Miles Garrett to the Rams for God's sakes. Like, come on, you guys, I cannot cheer for you. Emily: I am with you a thousand percent. The only thing I wish for the fans' sake they'd be better. But Hilary: Absolutely. Emily: the organization, I just can't root for them either. Totally agree. Deshaun Watson, just no, no. So good pick there. right, I'll round Hilary: Yeah. Emily: out I'll round out my list. And I forgot to say up top, I asked AI. Give me four teams to root against and for this NFL season. So let me just give you that quick list and before I I hit my last two. They gave me the Eagles, the Dolphins, Dallas, and the Jets is their top four to root against. So that yes. Hilary: To root against. Okay. Emily: Yes. So so I got Dallas there. my next one is the Steelers. I think that their fan base has been too spoiled with general success. They haven't won a Super Bowl in a little while, but over the years they've had too much success. And that fan base has obsessed with past glory of their six Super Bowl rings. Like their it's was years ago, right? seventy-four, seventy five, seventy-eight, seventy-nine, two thousand five and two thousand eight. They beat the Seahawks in 2005 Super Bowl that was known for a bunch of really bad calls against the Seahawks. And I didn't like how the fans handled it when we were upset. They're just calling us whiners. And like then the next few seasons I'd be watching a game and they'd boo bad calls. I'm like, so you can boo bad calls. okay. they have their terrible towel and it's just so like the and also Aaron Rodgers, I don't like him, and he is the quarterback for the Steelers. So there's just so much, so much there not to like. Hilary: boy, I got some family in Pittsburgh who's not gonna be so happy with that pick. Emily: shoot, keep listening to us. This is all in good fun. It's not real. Hilary: That's okay. It's all in good fun. Absolutely. Absolutely. Emily: All right, my last and final team, the Patriots. Simply put, the fans have not suffered enough for their past winning. They just haven't paid the bill for all that success during the Tom Brady years. They had too much success for too long, and they need to feel what it's like to not do well. and during those years, they cheated. They're cheaters, deflate gate, spy gate. I just I even though individually like I you know, it's not like I hate the players or anything. I just I can't I just can't root for them. Hilary: Okay. You you're not gonna get over that Super Bowl loss quickly, are you? Emily: Okay, I didn't even bring that one up. But we won we beat them Hilary: You did not. Emily: last year. It doesn't but I can't no, I can't get over that that Super Bowl loss, no. All right, Hilary: Hmm. Okay. Emily: round out our list, Hillary. Hilary: Okay. Well, I did look at your list because what's coming up next is who we're gonna cheer for. And Emily: huh. Hilary: I got a little bit of a laugh on this because somebody on my cheer against list is on your root for list. So let's see how that goes. so I'm gonna a little spoiler here, I guess, but I'm gonna say that I cannot cheer for the Ravens. Baltimore are not my thing. They're in the same division with the Cincinnati Bengals. And I am a huge pro-Bengles fan, as you'll hear in the next part of the podcast. the Ravens and the Bengals have a superheated division rivalry. Last year, the Bengals won the road game on Thanksgiving on Thursday night football 32-14 in Baltimore. And then two weeks later, the Ravens came to Pacour Stadium and served up a 24-0. shutout on Cincinnati. So, you know, ugh on that one. and I just they're not my team. And okay. Emily: Okay. Hilary: And then I guess last that I'm not gonna cheer against, you kind of touched on this. I'm not gonna ever cheer on our divisional rivals, Cardinals, Forty Niners, Rams. Not gonna happen. And that's what Emily: Yeah, except I'm cheering for the forty niners against the Rams. Hilary: Yeah. So like we haven't really talked about that but what do you do when you're watching the game and the matchup isn't really great for either team because they're divisional rivals or because they're two teams you don't like, you know, then what? Emily: every single game I watch, I have to pick a team that I'm cheering for. Like I can't just sit back and watch and try to enjoy a good game. So there's no way we can root for the Rams, right? And unless the season later in the season, Hilary: Right, right. Emily: like if the Rams go O and eight. like if I'm in some alternate universe, I wanna be in that universe where the Rams start O and eight, then I could cheer for them against the forty niners if the forty niners are doing well. you can flip during the season. That's okay. Hilary: Okay. But what about when you get to, you know, two AFC East teams or two teams that you don't you know have any stake in the game. Then what? Emily: Well, in general in general, I root for AFC when they play the NFC. I will say that. That's like a general rule. You want NFC teams to lose. but yeah, we could play this game where we pick random teams and say, who do you root for? Between if they if they're matched up. it's not a perfect science. You could root against a team that you rooted for the previous week. So Hilary: All right. I defer to crazy things like the weather or the home team or, you know, who's wearing the better uniforms, like gimme the buccaneer Emily: Sure. Hilary: cream sickle outfits, right? Like Emily: Yeah, it could be a it could be a storyline where there's a backup quarterback starting that you wanna see do well or something like that. So yes, you can flip flop. This is not like set in stone. Hilary: Yeah, okay. I just is just just trying to test you, see how rigid your structure for who you're gonna cheer for is. Okay. Emily: It's not rigid. Except for Seahawks, always it's not rigid and it's up for debate every week. so speaking of rooting, let's talk about who we're rooting for or just some teams to consider. I might as well start with the Ravens. I picked the Ravens. I don't have a lot of good reasons for it, except I had family in Baltimore and I'm a softie for Baltimore. But my main reason is that I love Lamar Jackson. I think he is such a talented quarterback. I love watching him play. And I would love to see him succeed and break out of the, you know, they can't get out of the playoffs and into the Super Bowl. So That's all I've got on the Ravens, just that I'm a Lamar Jackson fan and I would like to see him do well. Hilary: Okay. Okay. Fair enough. Emily: So all right. And then, I wanted to start. Sorry, I'm out of order. I asked AI. Do you want to know what AI has to say about teams to root for? Hilary: I do. Emily: They said the Rams, boo, the Seahawks, which is nice, the Bengals and the Bears. So that was there for. All right. And then I will move on to my second team that I will call out. I'm gonna Pull for the Texans this year. They are one of four teams that haven't been to the Super Bowl. They have a great defense. And when you talk about likability, I think their quarterback and coach are some of the most likable quarterback coach combinations in the NFL. CJ Stroud, he is known to have good leadership skills. He is humble. He keeps a low profile. He had a down year last year, and I just would like to see him bounce back. come back strong after a down year. And their coach D'Amico Ryans is, I think, one of the most likable coaches in the NFL. He's a former linebacker who started his career with the Texans, and he is known to have zero ego. Hilary: I didn't know he's played for the Texans, that's interesting. Emily: Yeah, yeah. So I'd like to root for a team that hasn't been in the show and and that are likable. So those are my two to start off with. Who do you have? Hilary: Okay, well, talking about who hasn't been successful in the show, my number one route for team other than the Seahawks, of course, is the Cincinnati Bengals. I love Joe Burrow. I've been following him since college, and I just really would like to see Cincinnati take the next step. The coach Zach Taylor brings some stability to the team again this year. He's the longest tenured coach in their division, which I found interesting. the team spent some money in the offseason to improve the defense. And I think the one thing that's working most in their favor is this year the Bengals have the third easiest schedule based on their opponent's prior season win-loss record. So if Joe can stay healthy, I think that there's potential for them to rack up some wins. he's in his seventh season now. Joe is, and I he's had some injuries and stuff. And I just really feel like his best, I don't know, window of productivity is kind of closing, right? Like quarterbacks, once they get to a certain point in their career, maybe they're not as mobile, maybe they have more injuries, maybe you you know, a lot of stuff starts to happen. And so I just Hope that that window's not closing for him. I love his connection with Jamar. They were teammates at LSU, who, as we said, three Super Bowls, no ring. And Joe Burrow gets style points, man. His pregame outfits. He's the best dressed NFL guy all the time. Emily: He is Hilary: He goes, yeah, he goes to Paris and Milan for the fashion weeks. He was at the Met Gala this year. Just a lot of good stuff going on in their fans are great. They've got who day. That's their pregame chant. It dates back to their 81 Super Bowl run. And they got a mascot. They got a Bengal mascot named Who Day. The only thing that concerns me there is they've got their bye week in week six, which seems really early to me. And then in week nine, they play in Madrid. And the following week. They're week ten is against the Steelers and week eleven is Monday night football against the Commanders. They got a kind of brutal stretch there in the middle of the season after the bye week. But anyway, I'm cheering for I hope you guys consider it too. Emily: I do root for the Bengals. My bestie from high school has been a Bengals fan her whole life. And so that's I guess another factor in who I root for. If there's somebody that I care about that's really, really pulling for a team big time, then I'll tend to root for that team. Hilary: Yeah, me too. Emily: Alright, who else? Hilary: who else? Another team I'm kind of big on this year to cheer for is the Los Angeles Chargers. You know, they play in a super tough sports market. There's so many other professional and college teams down there. And they split SoFi with stadium with the Rams. SoFi, by the way, looks so cool and it's totally on my list to try and attend an event there. haven't got there yet, but I'm gonna figure something out. Justin Herbert. I'm excited to see him paired up with their new offensive coordinator, Mike McDaniel. he was former in Miami with Tua. And I'm hoping that there's gonna be some creative development there for him and some new play calling and stuff. Herbert's kind of listed as quiet and steady leadership in the locker room and that kind of stuff. I looked up the ESPN watchability list, and the Chargers came out as number four with their explosive playmakers like Ladd McConkie, Amarian Hampton, and Keaton Mitchell. And then they got a kicker. Cameron Dicker is a two-time Walter Payton Man of the Year nominee. And in 2025, he was the most accurate kicker in NFL history with a 94.1% career. average he made he's made hundred and eleven out of a hundred and eighteen. Emily: Wait, his name is actually Dicker. Their kicker's name is Dicker. Okay, got it. Didn't know that. Hilary: Yes. Yes. Yes. Yep. Cameron Dicker the kicker. Yeah. 111 out of 118. 94% completion rate. So yay for him. That is an amazing accomplishment. And the other thing that's really fun about the Chargers is I don't know if you follow them at all, but they have an awesome social media team across all their platforms. Their release videos for their Season schedules have had Halo themes, Minecraft themes. There's just a super lot of creative stuff going on promoting that team. Love it. Emily: And one more reason to like the Chargers, Mike McDaniel, former coach of the Dolphins, I guess you mentioned Mike McDaniel, but he is the funniest dude and I love watching his press conferences and it's just love love that guy. Hilary: Yeah, he's fun to watch. Fun to watch. All right. Who else you got? Emily: All right, so Lions. So this is the only NFC team that I will put up there for consideration because in general it's hard for me to root for NFC teams. The Lions, again, another team that has never been to the Super Bowl. And I do feel for fans that have never been to a Super Bowl. Their coach, Dan Campbell, I love this guy. He brought a new energy and vibe to the team. He has turned that team around. He started in 2021 and he has made an impact. he had one of the most unforgettable introductory press conferences that I can remember. He had a raw, emotional speech. and he said he wanted the team to take on the identity of Detroit. And exact quote, we're gonna kick you in the teeth, all right? And when you punch us back, We're gonna smile at you when you knock us down, we're gonna get up and on the way up we're gonna bite a kneecap off. All right. So it was memorable. Like people were talking about it for a long time. Hilary: I don't remember that, but that's awesome. That's awesome. Emily: the fan base is likable, I think. the city is easy to root for because people generally make fun of Detroit. And so I would be thrilled for them if we don't make it this year to see them succeed. and then my last team is the Bills. So they are a team that's never won the Super Bowl, and for us longtime NFL watchers You'll know that they had four Super Bowl appearances in a row. So they went to four Super Bowls in a row with no win. That is just one of the most heartbreaking runs in history. Their fan base is amazing. They the Bills Hilary: They're crazy. Emily: crazy. They have a name for them, they're the Bills Mafia. And they are hardcore. They will tailgate in sub zero temperatures. And I think what I love the most about them is their philanthropy. they will often react to something that's happening and flood a charity and ask others to flood a charity with donations. So examples, when Damar Hamlin that terrible, scary like incident cardiac Hilary: Yeah. Emily: arrest on the field, they got up to $8.9 million when they pushed for people to donate to his charity. when Josh Allen's grandmother passed away, they began flooding a children's hospital in Buffalo with amounts of $17 in a nod to Josh Allen's number. And they eventually crossed the one million dollar mark for that charity. Hilary: That's a that's amazing. Emily: after Baltimore Ravens quarterback Lamar Jackson suffered a concussion during a 2021 playoff game against Buffalo, the Bills Mafia showed their respect by raising over a half a million dollars for his preferred charity. And when kicker Tyler Bast faced intense online bullying after a missed playoff field goal, they rallied and donated to his charity. And then one more when Cincinnati Bengals quarterback Andy Dalton threw a last minute touchdown pass to defeat the Ravens and broke the Bills 17 year playoff drought. the Grateful Buffalo fans flooded his foundation with donations. So I list all of those just because I think it is so cool that this is like part of their identity. Hilary: Yeah, you know, those fans show up. It's cold Emily: They do. Hilary: up there. I mean, not only for philanthropy too. Like it's cold up there. They show up. They shovel snow off the seats in the stadium. Now they're starting in a new stadium this year, so maybe they won't have that issue. But I love that community. I think that's great. Emily: Yeah, I think they're easy to root for. And then, just one really quick thing to my Kansas City family. I'm sorry I didn't put you on the teams to root for. know hatreds toward Kansas City. I love the Chiefs, but given all of their success, I just can't include them on the list. So sorry about that. Don't take offense. All right. Round us out. Hilary: Okay, I'm rounding us out with the New York Giants. The Giants are a legacy team that's been at least partially owned by the Mara family since Tim Mara established it in 1925. they've had some glory years. They've been to the Super Bowl five times since 1987, and they won four of those most recently in 2012 against the Patriots. But the last three seasons have been really ugly. 2023, they were six and eleven. 2024, they were three and fourteen. And last year they were four and thirteen. So, new coach, new attitude. John Harba's bringing his experienced and winning culture to New York. And he's bringing some new ideas. He's got a new offensive coordinator with Matt Nagy and a new defensive coordinator. Coordinator with Denard Wilson. And so I'm hoping for some cultural change there for the Giants. I think they've got a young core of athletes to build on Jackson Dart, Arvel Reese, Abdul Carter. They're getting Cam Scadabo and Malik neighbors back from injury, hopefully soon. And they got the old guy, Odell Beckham Jr. he was originally drafted by the Giants in 2014. And He played with them for four seasons and then kind of bounced around the league and he was in training camp for them this summer and he actually made the fifty-three man roster. And I just saw he's gonna be wearing his old number 13 again. So it's this kind of cool, full circle moment for him and for the Giants organization. their season opener is at home against the Cowboys on Sunday night football. I think that's a huge game. Gonna root against the Cowboys for sure. And I think that's gonna kind of set the tone for the season for them, how that game goes. I don't think they're contenders this year, but I think for this fan base solid improvement over the prior seasons is a win and I think they have a group of players that should be fun to watch. Emily: Okay, I don't love that pick, but that's what's fun about sports. We Hilary: Right. That sounds fun, right? Emily: like I yeah, I don't know that I'm totally behind them, but also they're an NFC team, so it's really hard for me to root for NFC teams. But Hilary: No, I Emily: I will root for them against the Cowboys for sure, no question. Hilary: There you go. Emily: So there's that. Well, this has been fun. This got me got me more excited for this season. And I look forward to talking with you as the season starts, Hillary. Hilary: I am so excited. I can't wait for the first game. Emily: see you soon on another episode of Unicorn Football Talk. Hilary: See ya soon, Emily.