Latest / Is Your Way In Your Way? / Unlocking Your Charismatic Power

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Unlocking Your Charismatic Power · Is Your Way In Your Way?

• 0:25
  Cassandra: Hello to all my listeners and I'd like to welcome you to this podcast titled Is your Way, in your Way.
• 0:30
  Cassandra: And this podcast for those new listeners out there are actually for individuals who we are really ready to support you and empower you to unlock your full potential.
• 0:43
  Cassandra: Many of you are ready to move forward, doing something different, such as be an author, be a teacher, change jobs, forgive someone, get out of a relationship, or be a mom.
• 0:55
  Cassandra: You know, you're just, you're stuck and you just need a little nudge or something so that we can move forward, because whatever your dream is and whatever your goals are, that's part of you living your best life on your own terms, and we talk about topics related to personal development, business development and even topics that will enable you to do some reflection, and I'm hopeful that you will decide, make a decision that you know what.
• 1:25
  Cassandra: This is what I want to do.
• 1:26
  Cassandra: This is what I'm going to do.
• 1:27
  Cassandra: I'm going to start taking action on it, and our title today is called Discover the Benefits of Elevating your Charisma, and I'm going to bring our special guest to the stage, and her name is Milena Dalinaros.
• 1:44
  Cassandra: Hi, milena, how?
• 1:46
  Milena: are you today, Hi Cassandra, and hi everybody listening.
• 1:49
  Milena: I'm great today and I'm very happy to be here.
• 1:52
  Cassandra: Oh, I am happy that you're here too.
• 1:54
  Cassandra: My listeners are going to be happy after they hear what we talk about.
• 1:57
  Cassandra: I love the title when we always talk about charisma.
• 2:01
  Cassandra: Right, I'm going to read your bio so that my listeners will learn a little bit more about you before we delve into our conversation.
• 2:20
  Cassandra: Milena is an expert in interpersonal relationships, with degrees in psychology, rhetoric and rhetoric.
• 2:22
  Cassandra: I'm sorry, with a military background, milena has taught advanced human dynamics to military professionals, focusing on the transformative power of charisma.
• 2:31
  Cassandra: She defines charisma as not about manipulation or power plays, but genuine connection.
• 2:40
  Cassandra: Genuine connection and personal growth.
• 2:43
  Cassandra: The magnetic presence draws people in and Milena's mission is to make this accessible to everyone.
• 2:50
  Cassandra: Currently, she's active on Threads X and Pinterest.
• 2:56
  Cassandra: Milena is building her website, she has a charisma blog, she's an author getting ready to publish her book and she does newsletters.
• 3:05
  Cassandra: She has several guest appearances lined up for this year and she's looking forward to sharing her insights with our audience.
• 3:13
  Cassandra: So again, welcome, milena.
• 3:16
  Cassandra: I appreciate you being on our podcast today.
• 3:19
  Cassandra: Excuse me Before we move forward.
• 3:32
  Cassandra: I'd like for you to share before we get into this charisma business.
• 3:37
  Cassandra: I'll call it charisma business.
• 3:38
  Cassandra: What was your life like before like what was your backstory before you started?
• 3:44
  Milena: Yes, so these topics always fascinated me from a young age and that is what naturally got me towards wanting to study things like psychology and rhetoric.
• 3:56
  Milena: So basically, I wanted to understand as much as possible about the dynamics, the social dynamics happening between people.
• 4:06
  Milena: I was always drawn towards also, maybe, books and novels that were specifically about how an underdog got from being in a not completely great position, maybe, or from a bad position even to overcoming challenges and reaching their goals and becoming more powerful or popular or more attractive Right In some way making it possible for themselves to get themselves out from a bad situation into a desired situation.
• 4:42
  Milena: Always really fascinated about those topics, okay, and also, within my own life, feeling that how can I make myself feel more empowered?
• 4:51
  Milena: I think that was the unspoken question that was driving me throughout all of that time.
• 4:58
  Cassandra: How can I?
• 4:58
  Milena: make myself more empowered.
• 5:00
  Milena: And through the things that you can learn by studying psychology, you get a lot of the answers.
• 5:07
  Milena: Studying psychology, you get a lot of the answers.
• 5:13
  Milena: And also, with that trick, it is the answer within.
• 5:14
  Milena: The answer lies within having a belief in yourself and it shows up as confidence and it really does give you more power over yourself.
• 5:23
  Milena: So that was basically it.
• 5:29
  Milena: But what got me into this?
• 5:30
  Milena: From an early age, from childhood to my upbringing, to my early adulthood?
• 5:38
  Cassandra: Right, so I missed the first part.
• 5:42
  Cassandra: You said in childhood you always was interested in interpersonal skills.
• 5:47
  Cassandra: What were you always interested in as a little girl?
• 5:51
  Milena: Interpersonal skills, interpersonal dynamics, social dynamics, those things.
• 5:58
  Cassandra: OK, OK, so we also read in your bio how do you define charisma?
• 6:05
  Cassandra: And you talked about genuine connection and personal growth.
• 6:08
  Cassandra: What are the qualities and elements of charisma?
• 6:13
  Milena: Yes, so the definition that I'm working on in my book is that charisma is an irresistible vibe fueled by life energy and deriving from a connection to life itself.
• 6:24
  Milena: It is both an enabler and a reflection of us living in alignment with our life vision, experiencing flow in our endeavors and attracting meaningful relationships.
• 6:37
  Milena: So, I have come very far from seeing the power dynamics only and seeing the empowerment part only.
• 6:47
  Milena: That is just one part of it.
• 6:49
  Milena: Okay, basically, I have come to see it more as something where we are more genuine.
• 6:57
  Milena: It doesn't have to do with the, you know, dark psychology, the seduction things.
• 7:07
  Milena: That is just the very, very outer petals of that flower.
• 7:13
  Milena: This is a.
• 7:14
  Milena: That is something that when you are maybe still trying to find your confidence, you are very attracted to those topics because that is what you see.
• 7:26
  Milena: There's so much uh, literature about that there's so much, um, you know, uh, pickup artists or that kind of crowd speaking about those topics which you find then really fascinating because they seem to have the answer.
• 7:42
  Milena: But that is really only surface level skill stuff, skill sets, and you will only get so far in really developing your charisma from the within, from within and out.
• 7:55
  Milena: So I would say, yes, that is one part of it, but I have come to discover that deepening this gives you much more profound results.
• 8:11
  Cassandra: What can block charisma?
• 8:14
  Milena: Can anything block it Absolutely.
• 8:16
  Milena: So we have the usual things that you could expect, like, for example, stress.
• 8:21
  Milena: And another thing is how you, if you don't really view yourself as being enough or as being, you know, good enough, um, having the value that you must perceive within yourself to really feel that you deserve your place in the world, your space here in the present.
• 8:44
  Milena: All of that, if you don't feel that you are enough and good enough for that, that can also lead to in itself being a blocker, because you don't believe that you truly deserve to be charismatic or even want to be charismatic.
• 8:57
  Milena: But, it can also show up as wanting to diminish other people's charisma so that you don't feel so small yourself.
• 9:06
  Milena: So that can be a really big buffer as well and it's important to understand if you, for example, feel that you want to talk, in a way, about someone else who is doing the things they want in their life or who is trying to become a better person trying to learn new skill sets and you feel judgmental towards them.
• 9:31
  Milena: That can be a really good thing to react on Right On your own growth journey, like why am I triggered so much by these people?
• 9:39
  Milena: who are probably somewhere where you yourself want to be and you haven't really gotten there yet, or you haven't done the steps that are needed, or maybe you're doing the things that you think are the steps.
• 9:50
  Milena: It's just not working for you yet and somehow these people might be triggering a reaction within you about your own perceived worth and your own perceived charisma and, instead of finding a solution within yourself, you're trying to make yourself feel better by trying to downplay others, and that can also be a blocker to your own charisma.
• 10:16
  Cassandra: Yes, so those are a few examples so it sounds like individuals that you interact with it, your emotions can feed off of them.
• 10:29
  Cassandra: It's kind of like and you tell me if I'm wrong it sounds like if you approach an individual, you can kind of sense whether they're being authentic.
• 11:05
  Cassandra: Or can you sense, are you just kind of uncomfortable, Like a person that has charisma and approaches another person, can that person with charisma be uncomfortable?
• 11:17
  Cassandra: So therefore, because they're uncomfortable with the other person, they act differently.
• 11:24
  Milena: Okay.
• 11:24
  Milena: So we are all quite good, naturally, at sensing how we feel around certain individuals okay, and those things have sometimes been dimmed a little because we are taught to always be friendly and we're taught to not think bad things about other people, or also it could be that we are taught to be a certain way towards different groups of people and in other ways, towards other groups of people, and a lot of that can make it hard for us to know.
• 12:01
  Milena: What do we really feel with our intuition about a person we're with?
• 12:06
  Milena: but, if we go down to actually trusting that, then we have different ways of handling other people's emotions and our own emotions in that interaction.
• 12:17
  Milena: So, we have, for example, what everyone knows as sympathy we might feel, where we understand that the person is experiencing something that they are probably not too comfortable with Right, and we feel sorry for them for having to deal with that experience.
• 12:35
  Milena: And we might care about them.
• 12:37
  Milena: So we don't wish that experience on them, Right?
• 12:40
  Milena: And when we feel sympathy towards them and it shows up as feeling sorry for them, we might want to come in and rescue them out from that emotion.
• 12:49
  Cassandra: We might want to come in and rescue them out from that emotion.
• 12:51
  Milena: What happens there is that we kind of show them that we don't trust their ability to handle their own emotion, and wanting to help another person in that way might come from a good intention, but basically what it?
• 13:15
  Milena: What it can do is that this person either allows us to help them, but then they are a little bit set back in their emotional development because they didn't get the chance to deal with an emotion that was there for them to actually access more growth.
• 13:33
  Cassandra: Okay.
• 13:34
  Milena: So yes, sympathy can show up like that.
• 13:36
  Cassandra: Okay, we also have empathy.
• 13:39
  Milena: Yeah, empathy, it is another state of, another way of handling emotions.
• 13:45
  Milena: So there, we can feel the emotion, but we can feel that that is not my emotion, that is the other person's emotion.
• 13:56
  Milena: And we might even think that, oh, that's tough what they're dealing with, but we are still comfortable in being in that emotion without wanting to change it.
• 14:06
  Milena: So that allows the other person to actually be in their own emotion, stay there, deal with it and access that growth that they are supposed to go through so that they can reach new levels in their emotional development okay, so that's, for example, those two examples, sympathy and empathy, and how we can relate to each other through that.
• 14:33
  Milena: But there there's there's also antipathy.
• 14:38
  Milena: Antipathy is where we feel with our guts, antipathy it's we don't like that person we don't like them and we don't know why.
• 14:51
  Milena: Maybe they seem nice, maybe they seem friendly and everything is great and we have a good conversation, even, but there's something that we don't really feel like we want to be with them and we don't understand why sometimes.
• 15:06
  Milena: Sometimes it's clear it's like, okay, this is an unfriendly person and I'm not having a good time with this person, or I don't know it can be anything.
• 15:11
  Milena: It's clear, it's like, okay, this is an unfriendly person and I'm not having a good time with this person, or I don't know it can be anything.
• 15:15
  Milena: It's obvious why.
• 15:16
  Milena: But sometimes it's not obvious why, and that is when our intuition comes into play, like there could be something Like.
• 15:25
  Milena: I mentioned just before that sometimes people are triggered by others Because they are, for example, successful or they have something that the other person desires something they can be really good at not showing this, because it's taboo to be showing things like jealousy or triggering mechanisms, because it's expected of everybody to just be friendly and professional and still that emotion is there, something feels off for that person who is triggered, and that might be something that we ourselves can feel when we feel this antipathy, for whatever reason, maybe unexplainable reasons we don't like a person and we don't feel safe with them, and that could be the reason that something in ours, in our guts, in our intuition, knows that that person does not currently want what is in our best interest.
• 16:23
  Milena: They are not completely, um you know, trustworthy for us, so it tries to protect us and we need to take that seriously as well.
• 16:38
  Milena: Like if we feel that no, something is off, I don't want this.
• 16:42
  Cassandra: Right.
• 16:43
  Milena: That could be the apathy, that could be our intuition telling us that we need to be.
• 16:47
  Milena: Maybe not stop our contact with that person, but maybe not tell them our deepest secrets.
• 16:55
  Milena: Maybe not share too much of our future plans.
• 16:58
  Milena: Just be on our guard a little bit.
• 17:00
  Cassandra: Okay.
• 17:02
  Milena: Yeah.
• 17:02
  Milena: So those three sympathy, empathy and antipathy, those are good to keep track on All right, and antipathy, those are good to keep track on All right.
• 17:10
  Cassandra: So the charisma that you're speaking of is different than someone being charismatic.
• 17:20
  Milena: Is that true?
• 17:20
  Milena: How would you like to define?
• 17:27
  Cassandra: charismatic.
• 17:27
  Cassandra: Well, it says charismatic is exercising a compelling charm, which is which inspires devotion and others.
• 17:35
  Cassandra: That's someone that's charismatic of, because the charisma is just about Genuine connection and personal growth.
• 17:57
  Cassandra: So so, so one can't be born with that right, or they have to learn it.
• 18:05
  Cassandra: It's a skill.
• 18:06
  Cassandra: Can they be born with that?
• 18:10
  Milena: Well, first of all, I would like to say that this definition that I'm working with it will include a person being able to have a compelling charm or impact on others, and that is because others just feel really good in the presence of this person.
• 18:31
  Milena: Okay, and being charismatic.
• 18:33
  Milena: It's not about being the star, being the center of attention, being the one that everything is about, because that is all.
• 18:42
  Milena: Again, it's quite superficial, it's um, it's only one aspect of charisma, whereas the other aspect is about genuine connection, because it is about how everybody feels in this situation, in this interaction, and that is also what makes it meaningful and what makes it more complex than just saying that somebody is charming or somebody has an impact on others, impact on others.
• 19:18
  Milena: Why the impact is there is because others naturally and effortlessly feel really really good in the person and they feel good both about who this person is this charismatic individual.
• 19:25
  Milena: They want to be with a person like that.
• 19:27
  Milena: They might admire this person.
• 19:28
  Milena: They might feel that they want to learn something from this person and somehow be in their energy but also because they feel so good about themselves in this interaction they leave this interaction feeling energized, feeling happier, feeling good about themselves and good about their own abilities.
• 19:48
  Milena: So that is um how I view charisma and why I feel feel that this topic is a gateway into so many meaningful other topics about how we all can interact with each other.
• 20:05
  Cassandra: Okay.
• 20:06
  Milena: And, yes, I believe that we are all born with the seed of charisma.
• 20:10
  Milena: This is something that is in our nature.
• 20:12
  Milena: We want to connect.
• 20:13
  Milena: We want to find our community.
• 20:16
  Milena: We want to be with people who make us feel really good about ourselves.
• 20:20
  Milena: And we also want to elevate others.
• 20:23
  Milena: That is in our nature.
• 20:25
  Cassandra: Right.
• 20:25
  Cassandra: So let me ask you for my listeners who are stuck.
• 20:28
  Cassandra: You know they need to get out of their way.
• 20:31
  Cassandra: It's kind of like maybe comparing themselves or, like you indicated, or they see somebody else and it's something about them that they don't care for.
• 20:42
  Cassandra: So if, if my listeners had this charisma that you're speaking of, this confidence enabling to be able to have this genuine connection, will they be more apt to start acting on what it is that they want to accomplish, like their goals or their dreams?
• 21:06
  Milena: Yes, so when you pose the question like this and about the connection, then a lot of it will come from a slight, small shift in perception it can come from viewing others as somebody who will judge us, somebody who will make a fool of us, or we will feel that we are making a fool of ourselves in their presence, whereas if we choose to see that other people are also part of a community that we are also a part of, we're all in this together.
• 21:41
  Milena: We are here to support each other in our growth and help all of us help each other to elevate ourselves then we will start to understand okay, this thing that I want to do, I can talk about it with this and this and this and this person and get ideas and support from them.
• 22:01
  Milena: I can share my dream with others and they will cheer me on, and it will generally feel that way, because I know that for me, it has been largely in this when I started to work about something that is so niched in this specific way as charisma, and when I've told people about what I'm doing and writing this book I have met only really happy and positive reactions.
• 22:29
  Milena: right, and none of the things that I thought like oh, who do you think you are?
• 22:34
  Milena: It hasn't been present in the people I've told at all, and the same goes for both the people I know from different times in my life, but also completely unknown people, new people who were strangers.
• 22:49
  Milena: And you have become amazing people who are cheering me on.
• 22:54
  Milena: We're cheering each other on Because when you start to show up like this, you start to draw genuine connections into your life, right themselves or a more authentic version of themselves, when we go into the world and start very practically taking steps towards right right.
• 23:22
  Cassandra: So that's one of the benefits of elevating their charisma, absolutely yeah.
• 23:27
  Cassandra: Now you're from Sweden and I'm going to ask you something because you're familiar.
• 23:33
  Cassandra: This is kind of we're a global country, we're just worldwide.
• 23:38
  Cassandra: I'm curious is there anybody that you think personally?
• 23:43
  Cassandra: We all sort of know that you would see them as having charisma, a famous person or and who might that be?
• 23:54
  Milena: Yeah.
• 23:54
  Milena: So this is going to be a very interesting example, because you might think like, okay, these you know, angelina Jolie and Leonardo DiCaprio and all of those I mean, of course.
• 24:06
  Milena: Of course, they have charisma.
• 24:06
  Milena: But one example that I'm thinking of as very striking is actually the scientist, the one writing about time, the origin of time, and, oh my God, the name is just like on the tip of my tongue now.
• 24:28
  Milena: The scientist, yes, the scientist who did a lot of his work from his wheelchair and then he lost the ability to talk, but he kept being able to Kind of communicate.
• 24:46
  Cassandra: Yes, oh my God.
• 24:47
  Cassandra: And he's passed away now, right, he's no longer living, right.
• 24:54
  Milena: Exactly, he's passed away now.
• 24:55
  Milena: Right, he's no longer living.
• 24:56
  Cassandra: Right, exactly, he's passed away um um, yeah, so um the scientist okay so I need to get his name.
• 25:08
  Milena: I'm just origin of okay.
• 25:11
  Cassandra: I'm curious though why would you perceive him as having charisma?
• 25:17
  Milena: Yes, so Stephen Hawking, thank you.
• 25:19
  Milena: There we go.
• 25:20
  Milena: Yeah, thank you, stephen Hawking.
• 25:22
  Milena: I have read a lot of his work.
• 25:26
  Milena: I think it's amazing, and I also read the introduction by Thomas Hartog on the origin of time, that book that they wrote together, where he writes about Stephen Hawking and he says that he was able to communicate with his eyes what he wanted to send like.
• 25:50
  Milena: What is the message that he wants to say?
• 25:52
  Milena: and um, whenever he was trying to understand what is the theory that steven is trying to say, what is the you know, really detailed and nuanced things that they want to put into the world?
• 26:08
  Milena: And he could ask him and he could see, like no, that's not what he means.
• 26:13
  Milena: And he kept asking and then you could see that, okay, yes, that that is what he means.
• 26:18
  Milena: And they had these worldless, uh, wordless communications going on between them and wrote this entire book about really complex topics on the origin of time, and I think that is really a really important aspect of charisma that you are forgetting that you're.
• 26:44
  Milena: You don't need all of the things that we actually have access to to access your charisma.
• 26:50
  Milena: He didn't have access to large parts of his own body and his speech, and still he was viewed by many of his friends as a really charismatic person and also, his message got through to the whole world right when he couldn't speak and that is amazing to me and it speaks so much about charisma that you think you need to, you know, wear that dress, or you need to do your hair a certain way, or you need to be in the presence of specific individuals to be cosmetic by association.
• 27:30
  Milena: No, you just need to be able to really connect with others.
• 27:37
  Milena: Okay, through the means that you have at your, you know that you can access in your way and have this message.
• 27:48
  Milena: Having this message that you truly believe in and feel passionate about obviously will enhance your charisma so much.
• 27:57
  Milena: Because through a message, that is, through a story, that is how you connect with others, because that is how people recognize themselves, okay, in another person's story, in another person's message, okay, that is, uh, why I think those aspects of charisma are probably much more important than all of the other things you know, the.
• 28:23
  Milena: The outer appearance can be something that you can add on top of that, but you need to have that first.
• 28:31
  Milena: You need to know who you are.
• 28:33
  Milena: You need to know what you stand for you need to know where you want to go, or at least have a sensation, an understanding of what is the feeling that I want to go towards that is part of what life vision you want to create for yourself.
• 28:49
  Milena: But that is much more important than putting all of them.
• 28:54
  Milena: You know decorative stones on on top of yourself right, just a bonus.
• 29:00
  Milena: But that can't be what you build your charisma on.
• 29:03
  Milena: You know the, the outer appearance, the clothes, the places you go, the people you hang out with, that is secondary and that is what people need to understand.
• 29:14
  Milena: Know who you are inside.
• 29:16
  Milena: Work on the inside first, when that is what people need to understand, know who you are inside, work on the inside first.
• 29:26
  Cassandra: When that is there.
• 29:27
  Milena: Then you have access to your charisma.
• 29:28
  Milena: That was there from the start.
• 29:29
  Milena: Many people think that they need the Botox, the fillers, the haircuts, the, you know, going to the salon Exterior right.
• 29:34
  Milena: All the exterior stuff and paying so much money for achieving this feeling of being good enough for a day or two.
• 29:46
  Milena: But if you don't have the confidence, the love for yourself, the authenticity and all of the other aspects of charisma that I talk about inside of yourself to start with, it can be the equivalent of trying to build a house with you know standing on toothpicks and um, whereas if you know who you are and you build on that interior, the, the internal world first then you can be on the top of a mountain, under a tree somewhere, and you're still going to be fine, you don't even need a house, okay, okay.
• 30:26
  Cassandra: So it's actually about connection, and by connecting you can have personal growth.
• 30:33
  Cassandra: It's not the outer which you're speaking of.
• 30:36
  Cassandra: You know I need to, like you said, the Botox, and I got to look like this and I got to look like that.
• 30:40
  Cassandra: That doesn't.
• 30:41
  Cassandra: That maybe, for a moment, may provide them with confidence because they have what they think they need it, rather than dealing with what's internal, that's inside of them, right, yeah, yeah.
• 30:53
  Cassandra: So let's talk about debunking myths about charisma.
• 30:57
  Cassandra: What is that?
• 31:00
  Milena: Yes, so many people have ways of viewing charisma that can sometimes make it hard for themselves to access their charisma, charisma.
• 31:23
  Milena: So, for example, some people are um are of the opinion that charisma only exists in certain contexts.
• 31:27
  Milena: So it's only necessary in such situations as, for example, being on the red carpet and on the oscars and there are an actor who has been in a movie or something like that.
• 31:37
  Milena: That is only necessary then.
• 31:39
  Milena: Or if you're a politician and you want a certain place in your country as a leader.
• 31:47
  Milena: So otherwise it's not necessary.
• 31:51
  Milena: It's an unnecessary fun to talk about but doesn't really change life so much.
• 31:57
  Milena: So they undermine the value of being charismatic, of wanting to be charismatic.
• 32:02
  Milena: And then, if you believe that, then why would you try to be charismatic?
• 32:08
  Milena: Why would you try to discover more about yourself or learn things, to be at your best in situations and all of that?
• 32:16
  Milena: It would just seem unnecessary.
• 32:18
  Milena: And another belief can be that charisma can only exist in some individuals, based on things like personality, your background, where you were born, how you were raised, your age.
• 32:33
  Milena: You're too young, you're too old, you know all of that.
• 32:36
  Milena: .
• 32:41
  Milena: And making it a prerequisite to be anything, just having anything like you need to be that and that and that and having all of these prerequisites before you can feel charismatic.
• 32:51
  Milena: maybe you never fit any of the boxes, so that means that others can, but but I can't, and that belief which obviously will hold the person back from even trying.
• 33:03
  Milena: We can also have hopes that can hold us back, such as, for example, the hope of being rescued by some external force, another person or a change in an external situation.
• 33:21
  Milena: And that can obviously hold us back a lot, because then we kind of relinquish our own power and make ourselves feel less empowered in our situation, because we are waiting for something else to come in and help us, because we are waiting for something else to come in and help us, and I have always grown up with God helps those who help themselves, and I believe that to be true that, of course, there are also external forces that are having a great impact on our lives, and it can be God, it can be the universe, destiny, you can call it what you feel that you resonate with.
• 34:04
  Milena: But, you will never find the support from that force unless you also do your part, which is to act, which is to believe, which is to do all of the necessary things in practice.
• 34:18
  Milena: Do them practically.
• 34:20
  Milena: That's why you have a body.
• 34:22
  Milena: That's one of your tools.
• 34:24
  Milena: Your voice is one of your tools right the way you connect with others is also a methodology for making the dreams that you have come true.
• 34:33
  Milena: Right, right, yes, that's one also the hope of being rescued and the hope of being discovered.
• 34:40
  Milena: Some people, some of us, might feel that we have a good message we want to send to the world.
• 34:46
  Milena: We have talents that want to come to the surface right other than just showing them to the world and starting to act as someone who is seen and is worthy of being seen, with our talents, with our message we are waiting for somebody to give us permission.
• 35:04
  Milena: Right, discover us, say that, yes, you are good enough.
• 35:07
  Milena: Now we are opening the door for you.
• 35:09
  Milena: There you go, the stage is yours.
• 35:11
  Milena: No, that's not going to happen.
• 35:12
  Milena: We need to just step onto the stage and start performing and start showing our talents to the world.
• 35:20
  Milena: That is how we actually will be discovered by our people when we start showing ourselves.
• 35:32
  Cassandra: We can't sit around and your mission is to position conscious leaders, love seekers and underdogs for victory and love, life and power.
• 35:44
  Cassandra: How would you and you also do teaching, so how do you see yourself working that mission?
• 35:53
  Cassandra: How will you be able to do that?
• 35:55
  Cassandra: What is the methodology for you to to conquer that mission?
• 36:00
  Milena: so one way is the book that I'm writing, and it is a book about charisma.
• 36:07
  Milena: People who will find it valuable will fall into these categories.
• 36:11
  Milena: Okay, the conscious leaders, underdogs, for example.
• 36:17
  Milena: The underdog somebody who will come and have these amazing ideas, this powerful message and make changes come true in our society.
• 36:30
  Milena: But they might need this push into starting to believe more about more in themselves, believing in their own power, believing in their message and their ability to make all of these amazing changes actually come true and that's where charisma comes in and the tools that I want to give to them in my book, because this world that we're living in, we all have responsibility of trying to make it as good as possible, make it a better place, and sometimes I don't really see that the leaders of the world are doing that, and there are a lot of people in power where I feel that some of the people who I know, who have these amazing values but don't have the belief in themselves Okay, if they had just you know, if they just had the belief in themselves, they would be much better leaders and would take the world in a better direction than it is currently being taken.
• 37:30
  Milena: So that's why I want to help people.
• 37:32
  Milena: I think it needs to be done.
• 37:34
  Milena: There needs to be a redistribution of power and resources in the world so that we can all rejoice in living together here on this planet.
• 37:47
  Cassandra: Let me ask you this is for my listeners Would you be able to provide what I call two actionable steps to acquire charisma that you can share with my listeners?
• 38:00
  Cassandra: What are two actionable steps that will enable them to apply charisma?
• 38:05
  Milena: Yes.
• 38:05
  Milena: So I like to combine internal work with external tools, so I'm going to give one of each, okay.
• 38:13
  Milena: And the external tool is to start with really being mindful of your posture, of your posture, yes, your posture.
• 38:24
  Milena: It's one of the body language aspects, but it's one of the most important and easiest ones to send as an easy instruction to people.
• 38:34
  Milena: So back straight, neck long, um, look people at eye level.
• 38:42
  Milena: Imagine that when you're walking on the street, that you are always trying to see what is happening on the second floor of a building okay, so keep your head up, keep your head high and
• 38:54
  Milena: chest forward, lead with your heart, and the internal tool or work that accompanies this tool will be be mindful of the triggers that are happening within yourself.
• 39:07
  Milena: When you start to do this, there will come up things.
• 39:13
  Milena: A lot of things will come up, like, for example, wanting to shrink yourself, and that's okay.
• 39:18
  Milena: Just observe it and try to understand in which situations do I try to shrink myself when I'm trying to have this good and proper posture, why Am I with certain people?
• 39:33
  Milena: Am I in certain places?
• 39:35
  Milena: Am I doing certain things?
• 39:38
  Milena: What is it that makes me want to shrink myself?
• 39:41
  Milena: And in other situations it might feel really easy and natural and effortless so what are those situations?
• 39:50
  Milena: what in those situations is empowering me and how can I make that more of a fuel for myself to keep having more of a charismatic body language, for example, through posture?
• 40:02
  Cassandra: Right, yeah, so so let's talk about triggers for a minute.
• 40:05
  Cassandra: So that's, that's the internal right, and and what else was it else?
• 40:11
  Cassandra: What else besides triggers?
• 40:13
  Milena: Yeah, so um self-doubts, self-doubt, fearsoubt, fears it, a lot of things can come up.
• 40:20
  Milena: It can be beliefs that you didn't know that you had can be exposed by something this simple.
• 40:29
  Milena: It can be, for example, that the belief of not being worthy to take up space that can come up, or a fear that what, what, what will other people think about?
• 40:41
  Milena: Will they think that I think I'm somebody important?
• 40:45
  Milena: Will they think that I am trying to, you know, play like I'm bigger than what I am.
• 40:53
  Milena: You know all of these things that can be rooted in something and it will help you to start, you know, digging through that and coming to the root cause of things.
• 41:04
  Milena: When you start to be mindful of triggers and fears that are triggered.
• 41:08
  Milena: All of these things.
• 41:10
  Cassandra: Okay.
• 41:11
  Milena: Okay.
• 41:12
  Cassandra: So for my listeners it's like okay, two actionable steps for you to acquire this charisma, whereas the charisma will enable you to make genuine connections and have personal growth.
• 41:26
  Cassandra: Right.
• 41:27
  Cassandra: So the actionable steps is your posture stand up straight.
• 41:33
  Cassandra: Don't look up, just look straight.
• 41:35
  Cassandra: Lead with your heart, okay.
• 41:39
  Cassandra: And then the internal is the triggers.
• 41:41
  Cassandra: Understand what triggers.
• 41:43
  Cassandra: What will trigger you that the trigger can be so bad that you lose that communication skill because you're upset, you don't feel worthy.
• 41:56
  Cassandra: So you know a trigger could be you're on social media and you see somebody that looks glorious, you know, and then you compare yourself to them.
• 42:06
  Cassandra: So if that's an issue, then don't look at social media so much.
• 42:10
  Cassandra: Is that what you're saying, right?
• 42:12
  Milena: That could absolutely be something that you apply.
• 42:14
  Milena: Yeah, absolutely Right, right, right.
• 42:17
  Cassandra: Okay.
• 42:17
  Cassandra: Well, Milena, this is the end of our podcast.
• 42:22
  Cassandra: We definitely enjoyed, and I have a different light on charisma versus charismatic.
• 42:31
  Cassandra: Right, and the charismatic is what you do, how you look, how you carry yourself, and all that, but you're talking about that internal charisma that will draw individuals to you.
• 42:41
  Cassandra: Is that right?
• 42:42
  Cassandra: Yeah, yeah, okay, okay.
• 42:45
  Cassandra: Where can my listeners find you if they want to get in touch with you?
• 42:51
  Milena: Yeah, so, just like you said before, with me offering teaching and coaching, that is all.
• 42:57
  Milena: Uh, that is all the case.
• 42:58
  Milena: I have a coaching program and a membership for people who want to learn more about charisma and elevate their own charisma within the context of a, you know, supportive community.
• 43:11
  Milena: We're all in it together.
• 43:12
  Milena: We all want this for ourselves and for each other, and that can all be found on my website, and that is wwwMilenaDalinaros.
• 43:20
  Milena: com.
• 43:27
  Cassandra: Say that again wwwMilenaDalinaros.
• 43:30
  Cassandra: com, your first name and your last.
• 43:34
  Cassandra: Okay, dot com.
• 43:41
  Milena: Yeah, okay, perfect, perfect, that's easy, just first and last name, absolutely okay.
• 43:47
  Cassandra: Well, thanks again for being a guest and enlightening us on the internal charisma that you talked about.
• 43:54
  Cassandra: That will enable us to get those connections and start having more personal growth as a result of it, because you connected with somebody, and whoever you connected with, perhaps you can learn something from that individual as well.
• 44:08
  Cassandra: Ok, All right, Thank you for having me.
• 44:12
  Cassandra: Yeah, it was a pleasure having you and my listeners.
• 44:15
  Cassandra: You heard how you can get in touch with Milena M-I-L-E-N-A dot.
• 44:20
  Cassandra: Well, W-W-W dot.
• 44:23
  Cassandra: No, no dot.
• 44:24
  Cassandra: Melina D-A-L-I-N-A-R-O-S at dot com.
• 44:35
  Milena: Is that right?
• 44:36
  Milena: Yes, melina.
• 44:39
  Milena: Yeah, that is right?
• 44:39
  Milena: Yes, so you know, with the texting in different languages, I'm just going to see if I say it correctly.
• 44:45
  Milena: So, www.
• 44:47
  Milena: m-i-l-e-n-a-d-a-l-i-n-a-r-o-s.
• 44:56
  Milena: There we go.
• 44:59
  Cassandra: Okay, that's right.
• 45:00
  Cassandra: I said T instead of L, right?
• 45:03
  Cassandra: Okay, well, thanks so much, and I tell my listeners bye for now, and if you found this podcast to be of value listeners, please share it with somebody.
• 45:15
  Cassandra: That will enable them of value listeners.
• 45:18
  Cassandra: Please share it with somebody that will enable them.
• 45:22
  Cassandra: I guess I'll say share it in regards to that, so they'll know the difference between charisma versus charismatic, and this is a different way for me of thinking about both of those.
• 45:32
  Cassandra: Okay, so I say bye for now and God bless you all.