Latest / Talk Shit Or Get Off The Pod / Episode 192: Ding Dong Gone Wrong

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Episode 192: Ding Dong Gone Wrong · Talk Shit Or Get Off The Pod

• 0:03
  What it do, Oh my God, what it do What it do What it do It is
• 0:14
  your boy Andrew Schultz. OK Mr. Goody 2 shoes and who am
• 0:18
  I with? As always, Joseph Huggins AKA
• 0:21
  old man Huggy. Talk shit or get off the pod.
• 0:25
  Episode 192. Ding Dong, stop it.
• 0:32
  I don't even know what that title is like.
• 0:34
  That's what Joseph put down. We'll figure it out.
• 0:38
  In the articles. Welcome.
• 0:40
  It's like a rant, and it's like a rant cause 'cause stupid shit.
• 0:47
  So I figure we'll touch, maybe touch on 2 topics before therapy
• 0:53
  questions in our rambles. Usually what happens?
• 0:56
  And then we'll just talk about the cause.
• 0:58
  The articles are like, are I like them?
• 1:00
  But they're much more like kind of chill this week as opposed to
• 1:03
  sometimes or with everything that's going I well, I mean, I
• 1:05
  don't know about that. There's a little bit dark.
• 1:07
  Alert. I know that I was like.
• 1:09
  What do you mean? But but it's not like all you
• 1:13
  know. No, I get it.
• 1:14
  I get it. I I I get what you're saying.
• 1:16
  Politics centric, there's all sorts of crazy shit going on.
• 1:19
  Right, right, right. And my therapy questions are
• 1:21
  goofy. Yeah.
• 1:27
  How are you, Sir? I'm good.
• 1:29
  How are you? How are you holding up?
• 1:31
  So so OK so finally I'm like like it, it ebbs and flows like
• 1:37
  some like like every time I think like I feel better like
• 1:41
  physically from like everything that's happened like the next
• 1:46
  day like I'll feel like like it just happened again.
• 1:50
  Like I just got like beat the fuck up by like 6 people.
• 1:52
  So I got like I've never I thought it would be like a like
• 1:58
  a like a consistent like you're gonna every day you'll be in
• 2:01
  less pain type shit. And it's like some days I am,
• 2:05
  some days I'm not, you know, so it's weird.
• 2:08
  I saw the Dick doctor today, said everything looked good.
• 2:13
  Round of applause. Not Doctor Yang Da.
• 2:15
  He was in surgery. It was his nurse practitioner.
• 2:17
  Yang Yang saves the wing. Right.
• 2:20
  But remember, he's. He's flawless victory so they.
• 2:23
  We thought he was going to check the Wang.
• 2:25
  Yeah, that's true. But the person who actually did,
• 2:32
  like, just as credible, you know what I'm saying?
• 2:35
  Well, yeah, I'm saying like, gang does flawless work, so he
• 2:38
  goes in there, he does his thing, he's like, check it, I
• 2:40
  don't give a fuck, I'm not showing up.
• 2:41
  It's going to be perfect. And they're like.
• 2:42
  Yep. No, no, I think he was in.
• 2:44
  It was an emergency surgery. He was like supposed to be
• 2:46
  there. Oh yeah, yeah, He just.
• 2:49
  Says follow, follows victories. So yeah, my, my, my word.
• 2:53
  Like, what do you mean you're not showing up?
• 2:55
  He's like. My word like you gotta listen to
• 2:56
  this shit dude. Oh God your boy still has a
• 3:04
  fucking hard on and was told probably will for the next 4
• 3:11
  fucking weeks and it's been 10 days but also I was supposed I
• 3:20
  was supposed to get the follow up appointment in five days
• 3:23
  that. Doesn't even work, so OK.
• 3:24
  So I was supposed to get the follow up appointment in five
• 3:26
  days. I don't even know why it's not
• 3:28
  even scheduled ahead of time. Like before I even leave the
• 3:31
  hospital, right? So I have to schedule myself,
• 3:34
  call the motherfucking place the hospital was at.
• 3:38
  I have Kaiser which I said before.
• 3:39
  I remember you just tried to get the the referral.
• 3:42
  Yeah, I had to get the referral. Get the fucking referral on
• 3:46
  Wednesday. Like I like I go to the I've
• 3:51
  scheduled but then I have to I have to wait till Wednesday, go
• 3:53
  to the appointment, have have someone look at my Dick so that
• 3:57
  Doctor Yang can look at my Dick. Then I get a call a day later
• 4:02
  Thursday like at 4:30. 4/20 I should say from Kaiser telling
• 4:09
  me I never needed a referral anyways because it was emergency
• 4:12
  surgery and I'm covered for 90 days to go see Yang who's not
• 4:17
  necessarily Kaiser, he just worked at the hospital.
• 4:20
  But it was all good with Kaiser. So she just told me like I don't
• 4:24
  even need a referral. I was like OK well I already got
• 4:26
  the motherfucking referral like so then she tells me to call
• 4:30
  back the place where Yang works where I was originally supposed
• 4:34
  to get the follow up appointment just to schedule the
• 4:37
  appointment. And then she gives me her name
• 4:39
  shout out Victoria and she goes if they give you any shit just
• 4:44
  let me know. I call, they're already closed,
• 4:48
  so I have to call back Friday morning and also Monday is a
• 4:51
  holiday. So as soon as I can get seen is
• 4:57
  Tuesday today. And then I get a text like 2
• 5:05
  hours later saying that my appointment's been cancelled
• 5:08
  because I need approval from Kaiser.
• 5:14
  I forgot what the exact word was, but it was so, so it
• 5:19
  sounded like like I needed a referral, but it, there's a 2
• 5:21
  two different yeah, authorization.
• 5:24
  That's what I needed authorization from Kaiser.
• 5:27
  So they so they schedule me, cancel me and I'm like, what the
• 5:32
  fuck? They just told me I didn't even
• 5:34
  need a referral and I didn't know the difference between the
• 5:36
  authorization referral. Call Victoria back.
• 5:41
  She actually answers the phone herself when I call like the
• 5:45
  random like Kaiser number, tell her she merges me on a three-way
• 5:50
  call with Yang's office. And then I and then and then
• 5:57
  basically just like goes to bat for me, schedules the
• 6:00
  appointment again, though not until today.
• 6:02
  So it's still like twice as long as, you know, it's supposed to
• 6:05
  be 5 days now. No, no, we're 10.
• 6:07
  But at least I got the appointment back.
• 6:09
  Like, but like, yeah, she was just like a hard ass.
• 6:12
  Like we got put on hold and she goes, are you still there,
• 6:15
  Andrew? I go, I'm, I'm still here.
• 6:17
  I was like, I'm just now let you handle this.
• 6:19
  Like, And then she was just like, it was like as if like
• 6:22
  your mom was calling to like get you taken care of.
• 6:27
  That's how Victoria took care of me.
• 6:29
  She was just like, she was like, fuck you.
• 6:31
  He needs an appointment. He had emergency surgery.
• 6:34
  You guys are being ridiculous. And then like then the person
• 6:37
  like apologized and like was like, sorry, sorry.
• 6:39
  We can just reschedule them for the same time.
• 6:42
  But I was also supposed to have an appointment with my General
• 6:45
  practitioner because they want to see me after the car accident
• 6:49
  and and it was the same day as today at the same time.
• 6:54
  And I just chose the urologist over the the check up on like
• 6:58
  the car accident visit to me that was seemed more important
• 7:01
  so that so you know, it's not you know, it's a mess, but
• 7:06
  urologist. So everything seems to be
• 7:09
  healing well. So I was good, but then also hit
• 7:13
  me with like the four more weeks of walking around with an
• 7:17
  erection, which is just like what he I was like what the fuck
• 7:21
  was the surgery for? Like what are we doing?
• 7:25
  So here we are bro. I know this is this crazy weird
• 7:29
  shit to talk about. I get.
• 7:31
  No, you're just it's. Just, it's just wild, just.
• 7:34
  Keeps going. But like, you know, like.
• 7:38
  Four more weeks, you're going to be like a month.
• 7:40
  That's when my father we're. Going to be a month over a
• 7:43
  month. We're already, we're already 10
• 7:45
  days in. I know, yeah.
• 7:47
  Yeah, 40, yeah. That's 49.
• 7:49
  You're going to be over a month. You're going to be over a month.
• 7:52
  You're going to be on some Harrison Ford. 40 days, 40
• 7:54
  minutes. You know what's so funny?
• 7:56
  It's like, I don't even believe it.
• 7:57
  I was like, I don't even see how this is possible.
• 8:02
  But it has not stopped since two days before I went and got the
• 8:09
  surgery. Sam don't even know what to do
• 8:13
  did did not. It's like the most ironic,
• 8:16
  crazy, weird shit ever. It's like most of these are like
• 8:20
  worried, like are worried about like getting hard, you know,
• 8:22
  when they get and it's like, I I can't not have an erection right
• 8:30
  now. And I also hope, I don't know, I
• 8:38
  just say this part, but I also, I also broke the doctor's
• 8:41
  orders. I don't want to hear about
• 8:44
  anything. Yeah, but I had to tell them.
• 8:47
  I had to tell them that too. You know?
• 8:50
  I was like, I know you all like told me like not to fuck around,
• 8:52
  but I did. And just but worth it for sure.
• 9:02
  Anyways. But also also also the other.
• 9:06
  There's no, no, no. Well, the follow up being is
• 9:09
  that this the first time that I drove since I got in a car
• 9:12
  accident was to this doctor's appointment.
• 9:17
  And that was like actually kind of scary for me.
• 9:21
  Like my sister's out of town and she inherited my dad's BMW after
• 9:25
  he had the stroke. So I took her car to the
• 9:28
  appointment, which was in Ventura.
• 9:30
  It was like, it was like 25 minutes away.
• 9:33
  But yeah, that's first time being hot, like being behind the
• 9:36
  wheel again, you know, after the accident, like, I didn't like,
• 9:42
  you know, I'm the baby driver lyricist.
• 9:44
  I thought it'd be fine like but it was like.
• 9:47
  Be stressful, it can be sketchy. Yeah, it's just the trauma, you
• 9:51
  know? Well, yeah.
• 9:51
  And you're just like, oh shit. So you just view it differently.
• 9:54
  It feels like you're going faster.
• 9:57
  It's like all just. No, I, I was going well, it was
• 9:59
  a different car too. Like so like I like, I would
• 10:02
  like check the speedometer. I'd be like, I was going like 90
• 10:05
  like, you know, like not even realizing.
• 10:07
  And I like just like I get like my bearings.
• 10:10
  Like German, German engineering will do that too.
• 10:13
  Yeah, yeah, that that car. Yeah, Bieber.
• 10:16
  'S yeah, it's nice too. Like that kind of fucking flies,
• 10:20
  dude. Like so it was just like I was
• 10:22
  just trying to get like my whole like homeostasis back and then
• 10:26
  like realized like more than once that like I was like going
• 10:29
  way too fast. Like and like usually I do go
• 10:31
  fast, but I know that I'm going fast.
• 10:35
  Like this was like I'd had, you know, I just didn't even know
• 10:37
  how to like handle any of this. And then but then at the same
• 10:42
  time it's like once like 25 fucking people like look at your
• 10:46
  Dick in a week and like touch it and shit.
• 10:48
  Like you just like give zero fuck.
• 10:50
  So like when I was in the room with like the nurse, I'm just
• 10:53
  like, yeah, like let's just talk.
• 10:55
  Like they'll just here's look at it.
• 10:57
  Tell me. I just, I just want you because
• 10:59
  I have no idea what it's supposed to look like, if it's
• 11:04
  good or bad, you know, like after the surgery and it look
• 11:07
  crazy after the surgery. I don't know if that was normal.
• 11:10
  I just needed this fucking appointment just happened like
• 11:14
  10 days instead of five days. So I was like, you know, I'm
• 11:18
  like over here with like ice packs and shit like and Tylenol
• 11:21
  and Advil and like just try to maintain and then but but so
• 11:29
  anyways, the point is she said that that everything looks like
• 11:33
  it's healing nice like nicely. And then hit me with a caveat
• 11:38
  that I might have a fucking erection for four weeks more,
• 11:44
  which is I'm telling you, it is so fucking weird.
• 11:50
  Like out of like when you're in public, it's like, I'm like
• 11:54
  trying to be like, I know, I don't even know how to deal with
• 11:58
  it. But again, this is like, this is
• 12:02
  like something that I never thought that I could think
• 12:05
  about. Yeah, note to self, never
• 12:09
  anybody take Trazodone. That's right.
• 12:12
  That's right. Just don't.
• 12:14
  Just don't do it. I know and I think I used to
• 12:17
  take it like. That's crazy.
• 12:18
  It's insanity, but also, but we don't know if it was, it
• 12:22
  probably was that, but we also, but also a spinal cord injury
• 12:27
  can 'cause this as well. And I fractured my vertebrae.
• 12:30
  So, so it's not actually officially the Trazodone.
• 12:34
  However, whenever I talk to them, it was the Trazodone and
• 12:41
  the spine were brought up and basically it's like they don't
• 12:46
  it's not confirmed what caused it, but it's it feels like the
• 12:49
  Trazodone which which just gets handed out like candy dude.
• 12:56
  Like I don't even get it. Like, yeah, and also y'all the
• 13:05
  if you have an restroom for four hours or more, call a doctor.
• 13:10
  Like that's real. Like I just thought that was
• 13:12
  some like motherfucking like legal, like lawyer being like,
• 13:16
  yeah, just hit him with like 4 hours.
• 13:19
  And that way like we don't have to like deal with any lawsuits.
• 13:23
  Nah and but what I was trying to say is what I something I never
• 13:28
  thought I could think about is like, you know, maybe in the
• 13:33
  back of my head or subconsciously I'd be worried
• 13:35
  about like one day getting like erectile dysfunction just 'cause
• 13:39
  that's like what happens to old people or something.
• 13:42
  This is the opposite. And it's like, like did not even
• 13:45
  cross my mind that this could happen period, and that it was
• 13:52
  as serious as it is. Like, so that's, that's the part
• 13:56
  where I that's why I like bring. I'm still bringing it up.
• 14:00
  Well, I bring it up because I just tell people everything.
• 14:02
  But like I'm, but like also like, like I was like making
• 14:06
  jokes about it, you know, like I had no fucking clue that like
• 14:10
  that this could even like this is like, it's like I'm in the
• 14:13
  fucking twilight zone, dude. It's like worried about like
• 14:18
  that. I can't get hard eventually in
• 14:20
  my life or something, you know, like, you know, might have
• 14:23
  crossed my mind a few times. No, I can't not be hard.
• 14:29
  It's a curse. I don't know what to tell you.
• 14:38
  I don't know what to tell you either, except for everything.
• 14:42
  Well, I'm doing good and we got some rain in Texas, so.
• 14:48
  Shout out. Shout out.
• 14:50
  Actually, like a shit ton, yeah. Too much again.
• 14:53
  Pick a flood. No, the right amount.
• 14:58
  And for the house I've been working on like my yard doing
• 15:02
  this landscaping. So it's like helping the grass
• 15:06
  that I do have grow so it's exploded.
• 15:08
  So that's fucking awesome 'cause I haven't really had to spend
• 15:13
  any money on grass shit. It's just been like slowly
• 15:15
  growing, so that's nice. They say it's the coolest summer
• 15:19
  we've had since 2008. We've only had six days or seven
• 15:23
  days of triple digits. So global warming, what?
• 15:27
  Although that's actually being Texas standards.
• 15:29
  That's great. I remember 1.
• 15:30
  Time I know, but is the summer over though?
• 15:32
  60 or like Is the summer over though?
• 15:35
  I mean, it's cooling down substantially now because of all
• 15:37
  this rain. We're supposed to get more.
• 15:38
  We'll see. I didn't know those two things
• 15:41
  were correlated. But.
• 15:43
  Because it'd be like 90, it'd be like 90° out here.
• 15:46
  And I got like an alert. There's gonna be like
• 15:48
  thunderstorms in LA. But there's been all this
• 15:50
  craziness 'cause I guess they released a bunch of Epstein
• 15:55
  files 33,000 but it's all the same shit everybody knows about.
• 16:00
  So everyone's like scrambling around and I was like, this is
• 16:02
  not, not new shit at all. And then they're gonna have to
• 16:05
  do another vote to release more stuff.
• 16:08
  I'm like, dude, like. The whole thing, every time we
• 16:11
  release the chat, I can't I, I just can't let this dude every.
• 16:14
  Time. There's like a chapter.
• 16:15
  We have to like, release it chapter by chapter Like it's
• 16:18
  fucking no, it's Game of Game of Thrones.
• 16:21
  Yeah, I mean, it's just so obvious what's happening.
• 16:24
  It's like it's like Trump is a Petter ass and like he's the one
• 16:30
  who's in charge. Of so another thing that was
• 16:33
  going around is that he's like losing his shit.
• 16:35
  No, like, but like his health is like seriously declining because
• 16:40
  everybody's talking. About his, you don't say.
• 16:42
  Falling ankles and his bruised hands and his hands with makeup
• 16:46
  and all this shit. I've been saying he's a fucking
• 16:48
  diabetic 80 year old bro. Like what do you mean who wears
• 16:52
  makeup? What's going on?
• 16:56
  Like like why did it's like I get Biden with slipping but it's
• 17:00
  like has Trump ever been on point?
• 17:05
  The dude is bat shit crazy. Yeah, and he was like, just
• 17:08
  taking like pseudoephedrine, like diet pills all the time.
• 17:13
  Yeah, he was. Yeah, he was taking speed back
• 17:16
  in the day. Like what?
• 17:20
  Like the fact that like anybody even thought like the I don't
• 17:24
  even like anybody who voted for him just because of the health
• 17:27
  issues of Biden. You're crazy, you.
• 17:30
  Know, yeah 'cause he's crashing pretty quick, I mean.
• 17:33
  I mean, God willing, all praise, all praise be to be a law.
• 17:39
  But Jesus. But that's, I mean, it's funny
• 17:46
  to see people freaking out about this stuff like they're going to
• 17:49
  get anything new out of it. So like, oh, we have everybody
• 17:52
  scouring over these documents and if there's updates, it's
• 17:55
  like it's going to be the same shit.
• 17:57
  I mean, unless like, I don't know how many times we're going
• 17:59
  to have to vote before we get to the stuff we don't know about,
• 18:01
  like. I just want to know like who
• 18:06
  because like like who is like actually like running point on
• 18:10
  like the the weird shit that like they do, you know, like
• 18:17
  like who's like giving like them advice.
• 18:20
  Something like this is how you should handle the Epstein shit.
• 18:24
  Oh, I'm. Because I know it's not Trump
• 18:27
  and I also don't like, I, I know why they're not giving us all
• 18:30
  the information. It's because Trump's involved
• 18:32
  with Epstein all the, all the fucking time.
• 18:34
  I get that part. But like, like, I just want to
• 18:37
  know like who's like, all right, this is, this is the strategy.
• 18:40
  This is what we're doing. And then and then like, you
• 18:43
  know, just like or like the tariff shit, you know, it's.
• 18:47
  Like they show they have those cabinet meetings and it's just.
• 18:49
  Like I know but but. Everybody like.
• 18:52
  Sucking him, trying to suck his like little Dick, like it's just
• 18:55
  like, yeah, I just want to like I'm just, I wanna be a fly on
• 19:00
  the wall basically whenever they're having these
• 19:02
  conversations about how they're gonna like be corrupt and
• 19:06
  grifting and like handle shit because.
• 19:09
  Whoever I wanna see like. Like, we know Stephen Miller's
• 19:11
  involved, but I just wanna know, like, if it it like he's not
• 19:14
  telling people what to do. Like, I'm like, you know, he's
• 19:17
  probably just like, plotting at all times, 'cause he's the Santa
• 19:20
  Monica fascist. Like he's like yelling shit in
• 19:23
  the meetings. Like he, like he, he, Yeah.
• 19:25
  Like if it was up to him, like, you know, he.
• 19:27
  Always sounds mad. He's never like.
• 19:30
  Oh yeah. If it was up to him dude like
• 19:32
  this shit would like be like escalated.
• 19:36
  I just want to know who makes the final decision and why.
• 19:39
  Like, I just because it's like, I don't like it.
• 19:43
  I have like a mental block. I'm like, why does he even care?
• 19:46
  Like he's sending in like the National Guard to Chicago.
• 19:48
  It's like, like who told you to do that 'cause I know like you
• 19:52
  didn't think about that. They they all told him no,
• 19:54
  they're like fuck off. He's like, no.
• 19:56
  I know, but but but I don't but like you think he like came up
• 19:59
  with that idea because it feels like he didn't.
• 20:01
  And and then I also don't even know why that he's doing like,
• 20:05
  like why he even cares. Like it feels like he's just so
• 20:07
  like. Got the military walking down O
• 20:10
  block, Dave. Yeah.
• 20:11
  It's like, it's like who is actually coming up with this
• 20:15
  shit? This dude, All he wants to do is
• 20:18
  stay the fuck out of jail and then get money in golf.
• 20:21
  Like it's like who the fuck is actually and why?
• 20:25
  And that's because distractions to distractions.
• 20:29
  From the whole thing is just weird.
• 20:30
  It's like it's just weird. He disappeared for a week, no
• 20:34
  one knew where he was, and then he just reappears today at 2:00
• 20:39
  to give some press conference where he's rambling about.
• 20:44
  Well, that. Topics.
• 20:45
  We won't talk about it, but. Well, that would add to DC time,
• 20:51
  I guess. Yeah, so he reappeared whenever
• 20:53
  whenever I walked in and got my Dick licked at again the exact
• 20:58
  same time. That's probably what.
• 21:01
  Is it? We got to wait.
• 21:02
  We got to make sure the boy's good.
• 21:04
  And he is, except for he isn't. Make sure the Glizzy's great.
• 21:10
  Got to check it. Make the glizzy great again.
• 21:12
  That's what I told them. I went in and I said we need the
• 21:14
  best. Everyone says you're the best.
• 21:18
  That's a lot of people are. A lot of people actually talk
• 21:21
  about how they might be the best here.
• 21:24
  Do people actually refer to Dicks as glizzies?
• 21:27
  Because that is genius if you just came up with that.
• 21:31
  No, Well, Glizzy is like. It's a hot.
• 21:33
  Dog. Yeah.
• 21:34
  Yeah, but I, I didn't, I didn't know that like.
• 21:36
  It just felt right, Glizzy, it just.
• 21:39
  It did. It did feel right.
• 21:40
  Off the tongue. I guess I'm just mad that I
• 21:43
  didn't make that pun before you did, I guess.
• 21:46
  Some would say I'm punnier than you, a lot of people.
• 21:49
  Nobody would say that. Would say that.
• 21:52
  Nah. It's a tragedy.
• 21:53
  It's one of the worst deals we've ever had.
• 21:55
  Him and his puns. Nah bro I just dropped private
• 21:59
  concord on YouTube and she went. She went off on 1100 views in
• 22:03
  like an hour, 'cause I'm so punny.
• 22:09
  Live it up. And then what else happened?
• 22:15
  The no, the Google, the Google court case crap.
• 22:19
  Did you see that where it was something?
• 22:20
  About Yeah, yeah, they, they banned them from like being able
• 22:22
  to make deals about it being like the, the only search engine
• 22:26
  that you or like being the first thing that pops up like as a
• 22:30
  search engine. Yeah.
• 22:32
  But that was, that was like, yeah, 'cause they had to fuck a
• 22:34
  monopoly, but then like were lying about it and like, they
• 22:37
  were like paying like, like apples paying them.
• 22:41
  They were paying apple like to where they were like pricing
• 22:44
  people out of even competing to be like the search search engine
• 22:49
  and just automatically would be that.
• 22:52
  And it was and that's illegal. So I mean, that's good.
• 22:56
  I like I like that. Like it's like and also guess
• 23:00
  what, Google, guess what, 10 years ago, you're the way that
• 23:07
  like you search for shit on Google looked exactly the same.
• 23:10
  And the only reason why it hasn't gotten even better is
• 23:14
  because nobody is competing with them so they don't have to
• 23:17
  fucking make it better. So that's where you still type
• 23:20
  in. You have to.
• 23:21
  And then you never go to the second page, right?
• 23:23
  And it's just like sponsored, sponsored, sponsored bullshit,
• 23:26
  bullshit, bullshit search engine optimization.
• 23:28
  Have you ever gone gone on a Google search and went to the
• 23:31
  second page? Maybe.
• 23:35
  But you're looking, you're looking at like links and shit.
• 23:37
  You know what I'm saying? It's like, it's like, like
• 23:40
  that's what that's what's wrong with monopolies is like, it's
• 23:44
  like when you don't have competition, then you don't need
• 23:46
  to improve yourself. Yeah, there's no innervation
• 23:49
  without competition. Right.
• 23:50
  So it's just like, so they're just like fat and lazy and then
• 23:54
  also acting monopolistic. Like clearly, like, you know,
• 24:00
  there's like, we're just going to bribe these motherfuckers to
• 24:03
  like. Well, we've seen.
• 24:06
  So they've seen like so now Google, there was Microsoft.
• 24:11
  Back on YouTube. We're on YouTube, owned by
• 24:12
  Google right now. Just just no.
• 24:14
  Oh yeah, they own, they own a lot of shit.
• 24:16
  Alphabet, that shit's back. That's that's the parent
• 24:19
  company. When you like, I remember we
• 24:21
  think it was Microsoft that got broken up back.
• 24:25
  Yeah. So Microsoft.
• 24:26
  It was like the biggest, Yeah, that was like the that was like
• 24:28
  the landmark, like monopoly shit, for sure.
• 24:34
  Like we've seen all, we've seen a cut, we've seen companies be
• 24:36
  broken up for being monopolies. They're all in the tech sector,
• 24:39
  all structure structured around the Internet and structured
• 24:44
  around like hardware and. Every single and well then even
• 24:48
  before the Internet, like telephone companies like, you
• 24:53
  know, like AT&T was like South, you know, it was like Bell or
• 24:58
  whatever. Southwestern Bell.
• 25:00
  Yeah, like and and they broke them up, but guess what?
• 25:04
  Every single time you break up these monopolies, not only great
• 25:09
  for the shareholders, great for the public.
• 25:12
  It's like like a lot of times. But the reason, yeah, I don't
• 25:16
  know, like, so the there is this dynamic where it's like as the
• 25:20
  CEO of a conglomerate, you get paid basically on the market
• 25:26
  cap, right. So you're just trying to acquire
• 25:29
  shit. However, it would be better if
• 25:33
  Google spun off YouTube for the shareholders cause the
• 25:37
  shareholders still get the shares in YouTube.
• 25:39
  That's a different company than Google.
• 25:42
  But that's bad for the people who the executives of Google as
• 25:48
  far as their salary goes. So you have like David Zasloff,
• 25:54
  like he's like running like HBO Max and or whatever the fuck
• 25:59
  they call it now only 7 times, right?
• 26:02
  And then there's like giving them like 50, fucking $1,000,000
• 26:04
  a year while the fucking stocks in the tank.
• 26:07
  But it's because he owns Discovery and you know, it's
• 26:10
  like all this shit. And so he doesn't want to give
• 26:11
  it up even though it's bad. And then it's also preventing
• 26:15
  competition, which is bad for innovation like you said.
• 26:19
  And it's just, and our girl, Lena Khan, was doing a great
• 26:24
  job. And I will say, I will say,
• 26:28
  though, this might be one bright spot of the Trump
• 26:32
  administration. Like where like the Democrats
• 26:35
  and the Republicans agree. It's like AOC and who's the
• 26:41
  dude, our boy who's also a sex offender who no longer is in
• 26:46
  Congress, Anthony Weiner? No, no.
• 26:50
  Matt Gates. Matt Gates, Matt Gates, it's
• 26:53
  like AOC and Matt Gaetz both agree like with Lena Khan going
• 26:58
  after these companies and from monopolistic behavior.
• 27:02
  And so this is like, it is a like, you know, maybe a positive
• 27:06
  right point like of like, you know, where we all kind of like
• 27:11
  agree, like this is just bad for society if you just let this
• 27:14
  shit happen. Oh God, you heard it here.
• 27:22
  Therapy questions. You ready?
• 27:24
  Therapy question #1 Would you rather be trapped in a mall
• 27:31
  where every store only sells mannequins of yourself, or in a
• 27:39
  zoo where every animal has your face?
• 27:43
  Well a mall where every of every store only sells mannequins of
• 27:49
  me. That sounds lonely.
• 27:51
  So at least if like you're at the zoo, you could befriend like
• 27:53
  the alligator that's got your face and like the hippo that's
• 27:56
  got. So they should have like shit to
• 27:58
  chill with but some of them would be dangerous.
• 28:01
  You're chilling with the the you.
• 28:03
  Wouldn't like, you wouldn't like hang out with like snake You,
• 28:07
  you know that, Like you know. Well, well, every zoo is a
• 28:09
  petting zoo if you're brave enough.
• 28:11
  I suppose, but you know, I'd hang out with the lemurs, would
• 28:15
  you? Yeah, lemurs are chill.
• 28:17
  As fuck. I hang out with some cool wild
• 28:20
  animals, leave the others alone, make sure they get fed and I
• 28:23
  don't know how many. Wild animals are cool with
• 28:25
  hanging out I I regardless if they.
• 28:28
  Have your face or not. No, I think.
• 28:30
  Lemurs are pretty chill, are they?
• 28:34
  What? How do you know what a?
• 28:35
  Lemur is bro. They're like they're little.
• 28:38
  Gray, Gray and black monkeys. But they have like these
• 28:43
  stripes. Are they like?
• 28:45
  And they like, jump around. They leap around.
• 28:47
  They're fucking crazy. OK, Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 28:49
  OK. I know what a lemurs are tight
• 28:50
  as. Fuck, so like I'd hang out with
• 28:52
  those types of animals, I'd feed the rest.
• 28:55
  I'd make sure tiger me. I wish that's a feed them.
• 28:57
  Nobody put you in. Charge, I'm a fucking zoo.
• 28:59
  I'm well, I'm trapped in a. Zoo with a bunch of animals that
• 29:03
  look like me. I got to take care of them while
• 29:05
  I'm trying I'm. Not going to let.
• 29:08
  No, I forgot. I forgot the trap part I.
• 29:09
  Forgot the trap part. I want can't let.
• 29:11
  Bald eagle mean you're in the trap.
• 29:14
  House and yeah, because that would be more.
• 29:17
  Traumatizing than being in a store full of a trapped in a
• 29:20
  mall full of mannequins, just being in a trapped in a zoo full
• 29:23
  of animals that look like you and then you have to watch like
• 29:26
  all these different versions and a more versions of yourself die
• 29:29
  over and over again. That OK, dark.
• 29:31
  Alert. That would be.
• 29:32
  That would be. That would be terrifying.
• 29:34
  That would be scarier. I didn't think, I didn't think
• 29:36
  that far into this. That's that's why he got me
• 29:39
  here, man, I think. But but no, I agree with you.
• 29:41
  Obviously, I think that I would just subconsciously have to like
• 29:48
  just be just take care of these animals.
• 29:50
  Yeah, that's just I I watch them now.
• 29:52
  That's what I do and someone else will show up to be trapped
• 29:55
  and that's whenever my shift ends. 00 is that is that.
• 29:58
  Yeah, maybe it's like some purgatory.
• 29:59
  Or something. But like, right, it's your turn.
• 30:01
  And then you watch all their faces change and they change
• 30:05
  back to normal, and he sees his face just.
• 30:08
  Like the crazy old man that you put the mushrooms down, put the
• 30:12
  fucking mushroom. No, I don't need them.
• 30:13
  It's called imagination. I see.
• 30:19
  My goal is to like get you to say crazy shit and that's why I
• 30:23
  make the therapy questions crazy.
• 30:26
  But like, I don't like think about it as deeply ahead of time
• 30:30
  as you do. So I didn't even you always you.
• 30:33
  Just throw me off. Guard, like I'm just like,
• 30:35
  'cause like this happened before where you're like, whoa, this
• 30:39
  part of the therapy question, I'm like, oh, I didn't think
• 30:41
  about that part. Yeah, I've dissected.
• 30:43
  The whole thing I know, but, and I mean, I don't really read
• 30:47
  them. I read that one right, right
• 30:51
  but. 15 minutes before we get on but.
• 30:53
  I I try, I don't try not to look at them.
• 30:55
  Yeah, my goal is. To make it weird your and then
• 30:58
  your goal is to I just answer them honestly.
• 31:02
  Yeah, exactly. And I do.
• 31:03
  Too. I just, yeah, I don't know, just
• 31:10
  threw me off there with the being trapped part.
• 31:12
  But also like what? What's a mall?
• 31:17
  It still exists, that's what. I just say to boomers, it's
• 31:20
  like. What's a newspaper?
• 31:22
  What is that? And then like the land landline.
• 31:29
  So you had a phone come out of your yard.
• 31:31
  It came up out of the ground like I remember saying to one of
• 31:34
  my. Co workers, it was like, 'cause
• 31:35
  I was like the youngest person on my sales team back a couple
• 31:39
  companies ago, like by far, like decades.
• 31:42
  And hey, he said something about a disco and I was like, what the
• 31:45
  fuck? Said disco.
• 31:47
  And he was like thought I was like dead serious and, and he
• 31:51
  was like trying to explain it. And I was like, dude, I'm just
• 31:53
  fucking with you. I'm just making you look old.
• 31:57
  Like I know. What a disco is I?
• 31:58
  Know what a newspaper is there? Be question #2 would you rather
• 32:06
  your dreams be directed by Tim Burton or your nightmares be
• 32:14
  narrated by Doctor Seuss? I mean, probably Tim.
• 32:20
  Burton cause at least it'd just be a dream so I know it'd be
• 32:24
  solid. It'd be kind of spooky.
• 32:26
  All the spooky people in the dream would be chill.
• 32:29
  That sounds pretty tight. That wouldn't be too off base.
• 32:32
  Having Doctor Seuss do a nightmare narrate it.
• 32:37
  Or narrate it. He'd narrate it so there'd be
• 32:41
  word, there'd be words, speaking over what you're doing you'd
• 32:44
  like. Where the fuck is that coming
• 32:46
  from? And I imagine.
• 32:48
  Being trapped in like a Doctor Seuss just universe with this
• 32:54
  like a Tim Burton Tim Burton Tim.
• 32:58
  Burton Dream that's like we. Can we can get kind of like?
• 33:01
  Creepy like, but it's still gonna be a good message.
• 33:03
  'Cause it's a dream, Is it a nightmare before?
• 33:05
  Christmas or some shit, yeah, but people love that, that.
• 33:08
  Fucking movie. No, I know, but I don't.
• 33:09
  I got. It's a classic, classic.
• 33:11
  Love story but but but hey low. Key low key hat in the hat
• 33:17
  Horror Story he shows the. Big ass cat shows up the fuck to
• 33:21
  your house, trashes the place. No, no, he's just narrating.
• 33:26
  The nightmare. He's not he's he's not like
• 33:28
  illustrating it. He's not, he's not illustrating
• 33:31
  it. Or a tiny I guess.
• 33:33
  To me it's like. I'd rather just have a dream
• 33:35
  than a nightmare. That means it's as simple as
• 33:38
  that right off the bat. But if Doctor.
• 33:40
  Seuss is narrating your nightmare.
• 33:42
  He's basically writing your nightmare.
• 33:44
  I know, but I'm also like. The word play, it's all like, I
• 33:47
  don't know, like. I don't know.
• 33:49
  I mean like your boy. Likes to rhyme and green eggs
• 33:52
  and ham being a. And that by some dude.
• 33:54
  He just makes you eat rotten food the whole time.
• 33:55
  That sounds terrifying. In a box with a fox.
• 33:58
  He's got some rabbit ass fox in the corner.
• 34:00
  Like fuck that. Like a Doctor Seuss.
• 34:03
  Well, I'd wanted to be. Like a rigid it'd have to be
• 34:06
  original shit like architecture would be all.
• 34:10
  No, I don't want. Him like repeating like box in
• 34:13
  the fox, whatever the fuck. No, I know.
• 34:15
  I want him. I want Doctor Seuss coming off
• 34:18
  like the top of the Dome. If it would have to be, it'd be
• 34:21
  that. Sounds even scarier.
• 34:23
  You're letting him go out of bounds, out of the confines.
• 34:25
  One of the best of the game. Though of our childhood outside
• 34:28
  of the box. I'm.
• 34:31
  Saying I'm saying his. His books as a Horror Story like
• 34:37
  that, as they exist now, is absolutely terrifying.
• 34:39
  What would he come up with? If that's what he's shooting
• 34:42
  for, get out of here. Well, no, this is the way I see
• 34:45
  it. Is the nightmare is happening
• 34:48
  OK? Horton kills a who?
• 34:52
  You're like oh shit bro that's fucked up dude.
• 34:55
  Whoville. I remember that place.
• 34:57
  Because that's what that scary ass green monster that lives on
• 35:00
  the mountain? The Grinch.
• 35:01
  You didn't see the movie before this, the prequel.
• 35:04
  It doesn't say Doctor. Seuss characters, It'd be like
• 35:07
  any nightmare that you have. He's just rhyming over it.
• 35:14
  I agree it's still worse. But.
• 35:17
  He's like, he's like. Like Dave Attenberg like on
• 35:20
  like, you know, like a planet Earth, but but but it's Doctor
• 35:25
  Seuss and it's a what if that's like super therapeutic.
• 35:27
  And you come out like feeling better.
• 35:28
  That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.
• 35:31
  Tim Burton scares me a little bit if he's giving you like.
• 35:34
  The underlying meanings to your dreams in real time and Doctor
• 35:39
  Seuss speak. That'd be cool, that's what.
• 35:43
  The question is. He's not.
• 35:45
  Creating. The nightmare He's just telling
• 35:48
  you what's happening during your nightmare in.
• 35:52
  Rhymes one. Fish I I would have some fish,
• 35:55
  red fish, blue fish, fish. It was Bradley who stole.
• 36:01
  Your favorite lunch dish, Snack, paddywhack Give the dog.
• 36:04
  A bone, that mother, that motherfucker.
• 36:06
  Man, I knew he wake up that piece of shit, but I'd still.
• 36:10
  Take a Tim Burton. Dream.
• 36:12
  Well, yeah, I guess if we're assuming.
• 36:13
  That a Tim Burton dream is not a nightmare then obviously,
• 36:18
  because who the fuck was like once a nightmare in general?
• 36:20
  Like Edward Scissorhands, if you.
• 36:21
  Like had a dream in an Edward Scissorhands world.
• 36:24
  That would be pretty trippy. And well, I'm saying like that's
• 36:28
  like that's. What that's my hesitation is
• 36:31
  that Tim Burton's capable of Nightmare Before Christmas and
• 36:35
  Edward Scissors hand so like, I don't know how chilled this
• 36:38
  dream is going to be. That's one of the SO.
• 36:41
  There is an old Paul Mooney. Joke ripi fucking love it's
• 36:48
  talking about white people in. Movies and he just talks about
• 36:56
  how white people can make shit up and just name stuff whatever
• 37:01
  the fuck they want. And he's like, he's like white
• 37:04
  piece of white people's movies are getting out of hands like
• 37:07
  scissorhands. Like what the fuck Scissorhands.
• 37:11
  And he just keeps saying that these like lays into it.
• 37:14
  He's like someone is smoking crack.
• 37:15
  Someone at the studio is smoking crack right now.
• 37:18
  Scissorhands. And Oh my God, there's Bobby.
• 37:22
  Johnny Depp, Johnny. Depp, it's like it's.
• 37:25
  Such a good bit because if you like Paul Mooney, how he he says
• 37:28
  it is, how do you not like Paul Mooney?
• 37:31
  Like just he's, he could be. Offensive and then at the end
• 37:34
  like so come on at the. End.
• 37:36
  He's just like. Ranting about crazy shit.
• 37:39
  He's like, everybody's trying to put vaccines in your feet and
• 37:42
  the governments watching you. And I was like, bro, Paul Mooney
• 37:45
  is he's like, I say it like it is.
• 37:48
  I said, like, you do whatever. He's like Catwoman.
• 37:52
  He's. Like one of those underrated
• 37:53
  motherfucking comedians on the planet like that.
• 37:55
  You can't, but you can't really say.
• 37:56
  Underrated because he wrote so much, he did so much.
• 37:59
  No reputation. Speaks for himself, he's just.
• 38:01
  Like the shadows you don't like. I think I feel like he is.
• 38:05
  Underrated though. Yeah, I mean, he can really get.
• 38:09
  His like public fame shine till late like Chappelle show like
• 38:13
  but. As a but as a writer, I mean.
• 38:15
  That's no, no, I get it. I just don't feel like.
• 38:17
  That like, like, OK, like people will like list off like George
• 38:21
  Carlin, Richard Pryor, you know, like those are the guys I I used
• 38:24
  to like download their shit on Napster and like listen to it,
• 38:27
  you know, like in my room like for hours.
• 38:30
  And he's just not in that he's not in that list.
• 38:33
  He's not considered that way, but he.
• 38:35
  Also was like but he should be, but he should be.
• 38:37
  Yeah, yeah. But I'll I'll find.
• 38:39
  It and I'll, I'll I'll I like Paul Mooney, but then more than
• 38:41
  I like. Richard Breyer, I'll.
• 38:43
  I'll send you I'll. Send you the link, bro.
• 38:45
  Every time I listen to it I'll bust out fucking laugh and it's
• 38:48
  just how he delivers it. Yeah, Tim Burton for me.
• 38:52
  Yeah, Sam, even though. I like to I.
• 38:55
  Like to hear Dark Doctor Seuss rhymes?
• 38:59
  Because that might be kind of tight.
• 39:01
  I, I, I your boy's been through a lot.
• 39:04
  Like I. That just sounds like a
• 39:05
  nightmare. Sounds like you're like AICP
• 39:08
  music video like. Woo woo, woo woo you.
• 39:13
  Got that Fago? Therapy question #3 Would you
• 39:19
  rather your laugh sound like a chainsaw or sneeze sound like a
• 39:27
  flute solo sneeze? My laugh sounds like a chainsaw.
• 39:33
  That'd be terrifying. You'd be.
• 39:36
  Banned from like public. Events.
• 39:38
  You couldn't go to a comedy show like that?
• 39:41
  Sounds fucking awful. Like what?
• 39:46
  Unless. You're really, unless you're
• 39:47
  Elon, man, straight up. I'm not even trying to beat me.
• 39:50
  You would, they would give you, you would be totally allowed to
• 39:53
  park in handicap parking. They would, the moment you got
• 39:55
  your license, they would just have you'd be like and also
• 39:58
  what's what's wrong? With the flute?
• 40:00
  Like what's wrong with the flute?
• 40:01
  Cell though your. Boys like producing music.
• 40:03
  I'm I'm trying to hit the 1st as much as I can.
• 40:06
  Looks like some Chewbacca shit. Dude, you'd just be like making
• 40:09
  the wildest fucking sound and you couldn't if you giggled.
• 40:12
  What would it be like that? Like the engine, like.
• 40:16
  Like rumbling if you laugh like what the fuck bro like get out
• 40:21
  of here get man and I laugh. I laugh a lot more than I
• 40:25
  sneeze, too. That, that, that you could find
• 40:28
  somebody. That's a factor.
• 40:28
  That's a factor I don't have. Your boy doesn't have allergies,
• 40:31
  so that's like you could find somebody.
• 40:34
  That could love you when you sneeze and have a flu solo.
• 40:37
  Of course it was beautiful. You, you are not going to find
• 40:41
  somebody that loves you if you every time you laugh, it sounds
• 40:44
  like a fucking chase. I would say.
• 40:46
  Like maybe I would say. Maybe a flute solo sneeze is
• 40:49
  better than just a normal sneeze.
• 40:50
  It's like an upgrade. It's like an upgrade.
• 40:53
  You couldn't like go on a. Jog with a significant other and
• 40:58
  they could make you laugh and you could laugh out loud in the
• 41:01
  neighborhood and not get fined by the HOA for using power tools
• 41:05
  outside Before 7 like after before I was saying it's as loud
• 41:09
  as a. Chainsaw too, or just or just or
• 41:11
  just sounds like that's what I said.
• 41:13
  It's got to depend like a. Loud laugh would probably sound
• 41:15
  like a chainsaw, so a giggle would sound like just like an
• 41:18
  idling like more like an electric chainsaw.
• 41:23
  Chainsaw or if you're like gas powered one or something,
• 41:24
  whenever you whenever you like. Like laugh like that.
• 41:27
  It'd be like, like, it'd be like you pull the choke cord.
• 41:29
  It's got to be a sneeze flute solo.
• 41:31
  Pulling the Pulling the choke. Cord, dude.
• 41:35
  Like if you just like kind of. Like you couldn't.
• 41:37
  It all sounds terrible. It.
• 41:41
  Does sound like, well, you know, like when like when you like
• 41:44
  can't stop laughing, you know, but you're trying to that that
• 41:48
  does sound kind of fun. You would have some good
• 41:50
  moments. Where like everybody would fuck
• 41:52
  with you because they'd be like, hey, that's, that's a crazy old
• 41:55
  man who lives on the mountain and no one talks to him.
• 41:58
  Why you have to live on the mountain?
• 41:59
  You would totally have to isolate yourself.
• 42:01
  At this point, at this point, you're isolated.
• 42:03
  You realize you're not fit for a society.
• 42:05
  Oh my God, you don't like? Them they don't like you.
• 42:08
  You're self, you're super self aware.
• 42:10
  Yeah. Oh, you know, how would you?
• 42:12
  Not be, Oh my God, if you're not, if you laugh and it sounds
• 42:15
  like a chainsaw and you're not aware of how bad that is, Like,
• 42:19
  are you shitting me? I'm just saying like, I don't
• 42:21
  know. I don't know if like the both
• 42:23
  things I could make I could make more.
• 42:24
  Excuses if like I saw my neighbor walk outside with no
• 42:27
  pants on it. Like maybe he's tired, maybe
• 42:29
  he's sick, maybe he's dropping erection at all.
• 42:32
  Times if I if I walked up to someone.
• 42:34
  Who was like, dude, you're allowed is your laugh is
• 42:36
  obnoxious and sounds like a chainsaw and they went what
• 42:39
  really I would might hit that person.
• 42:41
  I might hit them. That might be the moment.
• 42:43
  I'd be like, you know what life you're not terrified of?
• 42:46
  This person already life life has white.
• 42:48
  Gloved you to this point, it's time for me to UFC glove you and
• 42:52
  teach you like like yes, you're I wouldn't fuck with I would
• 42:55
  not. Fuck with somebody who laughs
• 42:57
  like a chainsaw. I would be.
• 42:58
  I would be scared, but that's what I was saying.
• 43:01
  It's so you've. Isolated yourself.
• 43:02
  You're in the woods. When people fuck with you, you
• 43:04
  can make like people would think like every time if you go up
• 43:07
  there, he chases us with a chainsaw so you could just run
• 43:10
  out. Doctor Seuss.
• 43:11
  Narrates it and like, laugh hysterically.
• 43:14
  And just sound like and like you're chasing them through the
• 43:16
  woods. You don't have any weapons,
• 43:17
  you're just chasing them. Cop cops show up now man.
• 43:21
  Check the cameras out I'm going to have.
• 43:24
  Nightmares now tonight of fucking Doctor Seuss who's going
• 43:28
  to narrate it of some tube laughing like a chainsaw.
• 43:31
  Jeez, the mountains stuff. You only say the mountains.
• 43:35
  Because you ain't have mountains in Texas and then you think
• 43:38
  you've. Escaped, and then you run into a
• 43:40
  zoo. Run into a zoo full of animals.
• 43:44
  That look like that look like that look like you, but I'm a.
• 43:48
  Man, I, I work there and I'm a mannequin.
• 43:50
  I'm like it's your shift now and then I just add you a mop and
• 43:54
  disappear. I don't even know if we can
• 43:56
  publish this like we're like, without a public service
• 44:00
  announcement ahead of time. Like, yeah, we're trauma bonding
• 44:04
  right now, dude. I mean this.
• 44:06
  Is just great. You're it's freaking you out.
• 44:10
  So I'm loving it. It's fun, but I mean I didn't.
• 44:12
  Realize what I did to us by putting it into yourself.
• 44:15
  These are. Great.
• 44:16
  I just keep. I just keep doing it.
• 44:18
  Just keep doing it to myself, OK?
• 44:21
  Final therapy question, You know, therapy question #4.
• 44:26
  Would you rather only be? Able to drink liquids out of
• 44:29
  baby bottles or eat solids with gardening tools.
• 44:36
  I think it's more complicated than the other ones because of
• 44:40
  your recent situation of you becoming a green thumb out in
• 44:44
  the back talking garden. Garden tools would.
• 44:46
  Be difficult. What do you mean?
• 44:50
  Eat solids with. Gardening tools I guess you
• 44:52
  could find smaller ones that make it happen so it'd be pretty
• 44:55
  normal. Drink liquids out of baby
• 44:57
  bottles. The only way you pull that off
• 44:59
  is if like you make it like a part of your persona on some
• 45:02
  pimp shit. That's what I'm saying and you
• 45:03
  just. Got to like stick with it.
• 45:05
  You know what I'm saying? Like in Don't Be a Menace and
• 45:08
  toothpick like he's that's exactly what.
• 45:10
  I was going to say, don't be a menace.
• 45:12
  Like, like, that's like the vibe there.
• 45:15
  It's like, yeah, where he's like wearing.
• 45:17
  It's like a stick, you know? It's like the.
• 45:19
  OG like you have to just own it but.
• 45:21
  Also like, dude, you're so like you're pimpin.
• 45:26
  You're no. Yeah, but I mean your.
• 45:29
  Your pimpin better be very. Fucking strong if you're coming
• 45:32
  out here with the baby bottles when you just need water, bro
• 45:37
  when you just need to get hydrated, let alone like
• 45:39
  anything else and and exclusively on the baby bottles
• 45:44
  like then people if you stick with.
• 45:45
  It long enough people and you do it like that to that extent and
• 45:48
  it's just like what you do then people at some point the
• 45:51
  community would back you up so somebody new moves to town
• 45:54
  what's up with this dude if it was you and I but like.
• 45:57
  I don't think everybody could get to play with that, No.
• 45:59
  What's up with that dude with he's?
• 46:00
  Always drinking out baby bottles.
• 46:01
  That's weird. What is that?
• 46:02
  He's like yo man, he's he's always been like that man.
• 46:05
  He's always drinking out baby bottles talking.
• 46:07
  So if you're obviously. You'd have to be consistent
• 46:09
  because that's just what the drink out of.
• 46:12
  So it's. At some point it would become.
• 46:13
  Either one would become a part of who you are.
• 46:16
  You could start a wave. And people just start surfing it
• 46:18
  and all of a sudden everybody's like drinking out of baby
• 46:20
  bottles and you can cook with regular.
• 46:22
  Utensils it's just eat solids. So you would like, I'm thinking
• 46:26
  like you could get like a. Fucking like, like the one of
• 46:28
  those like little like scoop shovels, like, you know, for
• 46:30
  like a like a tiny garden that and just eat your food out of
• 46:34
  it. Like doesn't seem like that
• 46:35
  crazy. Yeah, they'll just be like
• 46:36
  quirky. Yeah.
• 46:39
  Baby bottles, baby balls. You have to, like, own.
• 46:42
  Yeah, you just kind of. You have to, but I mean, that's
• 46:44
  all you drink out of. Well, I'm thinking like
• 46:46
  practically. You know, I don't know.
• 46:49
  You were the one who was saying that.
• 46:50
  Eating are you are you have like 1 of.
• 46:52
  These and you just have a big rubber nipple on it and you're
• 46:54
  like well that was the other that was the.
• 46:56
  Other thing I said Sup y'all what's?
• 46:59
  Up you ready to get down on this three on three or what your your
• 47:02
  your boy might have sent this. Sent the notes ahead of time to
• 47:05
  to someone and then they had a comment on that on that one and
• 47:12
  I said if the baby bottles you have titties then did
• 47:15
  definitely. Well, that's that's on.
• 47:21
  Pod. You heard it here first.
• 47:24
  Folks. Because I mean, yeah,
• 47:28
  definitely. I think our baby bottle for like
• 47:30
  until the. For the purpose of.
• 47:34
  Difficulty. I choose liquids out of baby
• 47:36
  bottles. I don't know.
• 47:38
  I I just don't know. If I can commit to that like I
• 47:40
  like is gardening to if anybody could.
• 47:42
  I could but. I just don't know if I want to
• 47:44
  do that gardening. Tools.
• 47:46
  You have some girl over. I made dinner all the way to get
• 47:49
  a knife and fork. No, sorry.
• 47:50
  Here's a hoe and a spatula. How hard is it to get liquid?
• 47:55
  Out of a baby bottle, like there's a here's a sickle
• 47:57
  because it because it feels like it's like you'd.
• 48:01
  Like you could like, like let's say you.
• 48:02
  Needed like to chug like a glass of water.
• 48:05
  I bet you couldn't do that with the baby lot, but it's a baby
• 48:08
  bottle. You can.
• 48:09
  Take the nipple off, it says no you can't.
• 48:11
  It says nothing about. Keeping the lid on, OK, well,
• 48:14
  that's part of. This like OK then you so good
• 48:17
  you. Like cut the whole if you just
• 48:19
  take the lid off. Then it's just a cut.
• 48:21
  Just it's got a. Numb on the on the I'm on the
• 48:25
  teeth. A little bit.
• 48:26
  I have no idea what the flow is like from the baby bottle.
• 48:30
  I don't know either, but we'll we'll.
• 48:31
  Figure it out. We'll figure it out on the fly.
• 48:34
  But I know that if I could. Use like a gardening.
• 48:37
  Shovel to. Like scoop up my steak.
• 48:39
  I could get it just as quickly as like a fork.
• 48:41
  I do know that when I'm. Stressed it makes a great Binky
• 48:44
  and it calms me down. So where's my bottle the the
• 48:47
  oral fixation? Part Now you're right, you're
• 48:50
  right. And your boy, you know, might
• 48:52
  have you know, I don't call it a Binky, but I'm getting a big boy
• 48:55
  bed. Next month, so.
• 48:59
  So whatever I mean to be. Honest, I wasn't prepared for
• 49:03
  all of those questions, but I feel like I kind of crushed them
• 49:05
  again, I mean. You served up some good ones.
• 49:09
  But I just hit home runs. I came up with the questions.
• 49:14
  Your answers might have been better than mine.
• 49:15
  That was my answers, don't know what I'm saying.
• 49:17
  That's not. What I'm saying, Yeah, it was a
• 49:20
  nice hollow loop. It was a nice hollow loop.
• 49:22
  No, that was very good. Those were very good.
• 49:24
  Questions. Thank you.
• 49:26
  Thank you. That's all I wanted to hear.
• 49:29
  What if I said you don't do good?
• 49:30
  Questions. I've never no, I just.
• 49:33
  Sometimes I just need reassurance, especially when you
• 49:35
  boys down, like go and see Dick doctors and you know, sounds
• 49:39
  like my boy's up. It'll be up for a couple weeks,
• 49:42
  then it's up, then it's. Up.
• 49:43
  Then it's stuck. Yeah.
• 49:45
  So it's you. Know I don't know you ready for.
• 49:49
  Articles where you. Need.
• 49:50
  Do you need a break? Let's just take a real quick
• 49:53
  one. Like but.
• 49:54
  We have weeks. Are you kidding me?
• 49:55
  Like we will be, We will be. Back in a second, nobody told me
• 49:58
  that. And now we're back for the.
• 50:04
  Topics. Interesting all right articles.
• 50:15
  First one is from the BBC. This is around the title of the
• 50:20
  story and we'll talk about this for a little bit, but a Texas
• 50:23
  man charged with murder and shooting of child playing
• 50:25
  doorbell prank or Ding Dong ditching people.
• 50:28
  This has happened like at least. Two or three times.
• 50:32
  This year, well, you and I had always.
• 50:34
  Like I've been talking for years, like, like if we used to
• 50:37
  do the shit that we did back in the day, today, that's what
• 50:41
  happened to us. You get shot.
• 50:43
  Yeah. This 42 year old man has been
• 50:45
  charged with murder for allegedly shooting an 11 year
• 50:48
  old boy who rang his doorbell and ran away.
• 50:51
  Julian Guzman was playing Ding Dong ditch prank prank game of
• 50:56
  ringing doorbells just before 2300 hours local time on
• 51:01
  Saturday night in Houston, TX when he was shot, police said.
• 51:05
  The man, identified as Gonzalo Leon Junior, was taken into
• 51:09
  custody on Tuesday and has been booked in Harris County Jail.
• 51:12
  Officers were told that Guzman was ringing doorbells of homes
• 51:15
  in the area and running away. A witness stated Guzman was
• 51:19
  running from a house after ringing the doorbell just prior
• 51:22
  to suffering a gunshot wound. Police said Guzman was wounded
• 51:25
  when he arrived at the scene and was taken to a nearby hospital.
• 51:28
  He later died on Saturday. Which is super fucking sad.
• 51:32
  Like super fucking sad that you someone would get shot doing
• 51:35
  that. We can rant about it in a
• 51:38
  second. But one person was detained on
• 51:40
  scene for questioning was later released.
• 51:42
  A witness recalled that someone ran out of that house and was
• 51:45
  shooting at the kids running down the street.
• 51:48
  Unfortunately, sadly enough, one of the boys was 11, was shot in
• 51:52
  the back. Doesn't look like any type of
• 51:55
  self-defense. Ding Dong ditch.
• 51:57
  Pranks, which are becoming increasingly popular on TikTok,
• 52:00
  have led to deadly shootings. A Virginia man was charged in
• 52:03
  May with second degree murder for allegedly shooting a
• 52:06
  teenager who was filming A TikTok of himself playing the
• 52:10
  prank on the man's home. And I think that was it like 11
• 52:13
  or something or was it or might have been actually like later
• 52:16
  like early morning times like? The time because you just, you
• 52:20
  just said the kid who got shot was eleven.
• 52:23
  No, no, the no, no, no. The kid was the one in Virginia.
• 52:25
  I'm pretty sure that that one, but you're but you're when you
• 52:27
  said. 11 This time you meant the time of day.
• 52:29
  Yeah, the time of day. It was like late.
• 52:32
  And then a California man was found guilty of murder in 2023
• 52:35
  for killing three teenage boys by ramming his car into them
• 52:42
  after they had rung his doorbell as a prank.
• 52:47
  See. So this is my own thing.
• 52:49
  Stop Ding Dong ditching. Like, it's not like I used to do
• 52:54
  some wild shit. Wild.
• 52:57
  I mean, I think I've told the story When I threw the fire, we
• 52:59
  used to ring doorbells and throw fireworks at people.
• 53:02
  So people would come outside and I'd throw an M80, which is like
• 53:06
  a little mini stick of dynamite like at them.
• 53:09
  And then we'd take off. And I told, you know, that one
• 53:11
  guy acted like he got shot and like, like that.
• 53:15
  Would make kind of more sense, like for the the reaction, yeah,
• 53:21
  his reaction was that. He got shot, so no, I know, but
• 53:23
  but you know what I'm saying like.
• 53:24
  If like somebody's like throwing explosives at you, like OK,
• 53:28
  maybe so like long story for. People who hadn't heard the
• 53:31
  story before, back in the day we used to like Ding Dong ditch and
• 53:34
  as you were getting older, you got to get more creative to
• 53:37
  raise the stakes cause like just ringing a doorbell and running
• 53:40
  away, it's a progressive disease.
• 53:42
  Yeah, it doesn't it like. Dies off.
• 53:44
  Like, while that's still fun, every once in a while you can
• 53:48
  get a good reaction out of somebody who would completely
• 53:51
  meltdown because you do it. And then you hit them like two
• 53:54
  or three times and they're just like crashing the fuck out
• 53:56
  'cause they can't find you or they go look for you.
• 53:59
  But we upped the stakes, so I was on roller blades at the
• 54:02
  time. Not the missing, but fruit.
• 54:05
  But. That was.
• 54:07
  Pretty good on my. Blades, man, it doesn't matter.
• 54:11
  I had. I had the big three.
• 54:12
  I had the big three, so I played hockey.
• 54:14
  I played. Hockey dude like what do you
• 54:15
  mean there? Fruit.
• 54:17
  Fruit booter. That's K2.
• 54:19
  K2 backyard bobs man the the better.
• 54:23
  Rollerblader you are, the more fruity the booty you are, I
• 54:26
  think. But yeah.
• 54:29
  I would. There's this one guy, big yard.
• 54:32
  They ring the doorbell. I wait by the mailbox and as he
• 54:36
  comes out I throw it, throw a big M80 at him in the Bush by
• 54:41
  him so he opens up the door. It booms and goes off.
• 54:44
  The echo is loud because this isn't South Lake so they have
• 54:46
  these big obnoxious fucking arched doorways in Texas where
• 54:51
  we grew up. And this dude?
• 54:53
  Stumbles down like makes this, grabs his like stomach like he
• 54:58
  got shot and like groans and then stops, looks around and
• 55:03
  then slams the fucking doors. Funniest shit I've ever seen.
• 55:06
  One of the funniest things I've ever seen.
• 55:07
  But we used to like go Ding Dong, do we?
• 55:11
  We would sticky and a bunch of us, we would like crash spend
• 55:15
  the night at somebody's house, right?
• 55:16
  We would put tents in the backyard.
• 55:20
  We would dress up in military fatigues in all black spray.
• 55:25
  Paint Squirt. Guns and shit all black so they
• 55:29
  look like fucking guns and we would go run around the
• 55:32
  neighborhood at night. We would sneak out, go Ding Dong
• 55:35
  ditch people, go mess with people, act like we were like
• 55:39
  Seal Team 6 running through South Ridge Lakes at like which
• 55:43
  is a neighborhood in. South Lake, Yeah, which is just
• 55:46
  a very. Ritzy bougie white neighborhood
• 55:48
  that I grew up in and we're running around at like 1:00 in
• 55:51
  the morning dressed up in like full blown military fatigues
• 55:54
  carrying like spray painted MP fives like crazy shit, crazy
• 55:59
  shit. I remember one time we were
• 56:01
  going to go ring Brad Hall's dork doorbell and oh, we're
• 56:04
  we're hit him with the full. Fucking name his.
• 56:08
  Dude. Well, Brad's got his own little
• 56:09
  phone because that dude, there's a video of him, he just dead
• 56:12
  lifted like 810 lbs like it's a fucking monster, dude.
• 56:15
  So we went to go ring that dude's doorbell and his fucking
• 56:20
  mom busted out chasing us down the street and threatened to
• 56:23
  accuse us of trying to Egger house.
• 56:25
  I was like, I was just trying to ring a doorbell, but I walked up
• 56:27
  like. Like dude, like so.
• 56:31
  Bad like you would be arrested. My black ass would be shot 100
• 56:37
  percent, 100%. And so the and.
• 56:40
  Then like it added like the. Ring camera effect, you know.
• 56:42
  Oh see, the Ring camera fucked it up.
• 56:44
  Yeah. Did the cameras, the cameras
• 56:46
  really fucked up the well that that's kind of like where?
• 56:49
  I was going but like even. But even if they didn't exist,
• 56:53
  doing what you just said you did is.
• 56:56
  But there are ways. Where you could, if you got like
• 56:59
  a big mirror, like a body mirror, you could like, you
• 57:01
  could walk up towards it and keep it in front of you and
• 57:04
  they'd never see you and you could ring the doorbell and then
• 57:07
  run. But I mean, you do.
• 57:08
  And they're going to be like. Hey.
• 57:10
  Are you dropping? Are you dropping knowledge?
• 57:12
  Right now, 'cause that. But there's I never even thought
• 57:14
  about how to get around a Ring camera.
• 57:16
  I just thought you weren't raised by Nancy.
• 57:19
  Lynn Huggins dude, come on bro. You got it, dude.
• 57:22
  Dude that is like the. Most toxic shit I've ever heard
• 57:25
  in my life is a strategy to to deflect the ring camera so you
• 57:34
  can go to somebody's door. Well, that's I remember I.
• 57:38
  Remember, I just told you I watched all the Mission
• 57:40
  Impossibles and it has that screen that he uses and then he.
• 57:43
  Walks it towards, in it and then.
• 57:46
  So when they look at it, it's. Reflecting like you, just like I
• 57:49
  thought you just. Came up with that like well, I
• 57:51
  mean, yes, but you. Didn't let me finish the other
• 57:53
  part or have done that. Didn't let me finish the other
• 57:56
  part. I'm letting you finish.
• 57:58
  The biggest issue with it is. You're probably going to get
• 58:01
  caught or someone would see you because they need to be running
• 58:03
  down the street with a big ass fucking body mirror.
• 58:06
  They'd be like, hey man, who rang my doorbell and bolted like
• 58:09
  that kid, they carrying that big fucking mirror, You could see
• 58:12
  them. Does it have to?
• 58:13
  Does it have to be a body? Mirror could it just They have
• 58:15
  to be big enough to cover. Yeah, they want to cover your
• 58:18
  face. Then you got to change.
• 58:19
  Clothes like, oh, then it's like a car chase.
• 58:22
  Like there you got to wear a sweatshirt so you can change the
• 58:24
  basketball shorts underneath them.
• 58:26
  So then you're like, no, what do you mean blue pants, Red Hat?
• 58:28
  I don't know that you have to. So therapy question number.
• 58:31
  Five. Would you rather have one that
• 58:33
  just covers your face so that it's not as conspicuous, or
• 58:37
  would you rather have one full body length so that they can't
• 58:42
  see you at all? Full body length.
• 58:45
  'Cause even for me that's problematic, so I carry.
• 58:48
  Around that, well see, but this is.
• 58:50
  This is where your white privilege is showing.
• 58:52
  See, for me, my capacity, hey, I didn't.
• 58:54
  See his face? But he's it was a black guy, and
• 58:58
  there's eight of them in the neighborhood.
• 59:00
  Well, not if you were all dressed.
• 59:01
  In like whip out the HO well. Yeah, but that it's even.
• 59:05
  I mean, at that point it was even less than that.
• 59:08
  It was like he was black and it was a boy.
• 59:10
  Well, there's Tyra, and then there's those.
• 59:12
  Like, there's not that many people like that in this.
• 59:14
  Yeah. Where we grew up.
• 59:15
  Yeah. For.
• 59:15
  Sure. Yeah, that was always a very
• 59:18
  short. List be like Dad, the black kid
• 59:20
  at school punched me and they'd be like Joseph Huggins punched
• 59:22
  you. It wasn't like it.
• 59:24
  Wasn't like a mystery. I mean, you're not wrong.
• 59:27
  You're not wrong like that it it so when we picked up a couple
• 59:31
  more. I was like, thank you, a little
• 59:32
  mystery. Now you got to talk to a couple
• 59:34
  of us because right now I'm just, I still feel like you
• 59:36
  could, you could. Get away with like the only
• 59:40
  covering your face mirror strategy without them picking up
• 59:44
  on your race if you were. Closed.
• 59:51
  Well, that goes. In that goes in indiscreet.
• 59:53
  Indiscreet. That goes in like my whole
• 59:54
  robbing a bang. Theory you would just have to
• 59:57
  like pick up off pick a pick a random primary color.
• 1:00:01
  We wear the, you know, long sleeves, ski mask all that, but
• 1:00:05
  then you got to paint your face like purple and you got to paint
• 1:00:08
  your arms. I mean if you're, if you're.
• 1:00:10
  Robbing a bank, are you doing it like point break style where
• 1:00:14
  you're like getting everybody's ass on the ground?
• 1:00:16
  Or are you doing it like where you have a note and then you
• 1:00:20
  just hand it to the teller? That I probably probably.
• 1:00:24
  Everybody on the ground, I mean, that's I don't.
• 1:00:27
  Trust the teller. Because then they gives them the
• 1:00:29
  opportunity to do like dye packs, stuff like that, that
• 1:00:32
  show me where the money is, I'll grab it.
• 1:00:34
  I wouldn't. I would.
• 1:00:35
  No, I mean like. I would.
• 1:00:38
  I would do everybody's hands in the air.
• 1:00:41
  Like you just don't care because that's like a fun way to bring
• 1:00:43
  like a party atmosphere to a bank robbery.
• 1:00:46
  That's true. Yeah.
• 1:00:47
  Maybe bring a Bluetooth? Well, no 'cause I got to hear.
• 1:00:52
  If the where where the sirens are you done with OPP cause the?
• 1:00:55
  Bank owes me some motherfucking money.
• 1:00:58
  Let's go. I I think that's.
• 1:01:00
  Part of the G move. The G move is is.
• 1:01:02
  Handing them a note. Well, the the note, but I.
• 1:01:05
  Think that maybe that's something you would grow into
• 1:01:08
  'cause I think originally you would just enjoy the thrill of
• 1:01:11
  being like, hey everybody get the fuck on the ground.
• 1:01:14
  Like, I think that that would be, I mean, to me, it's like
• 1:01:16
  you're robbing the. Bank 'cause that's what the
• 1:01:18
  fucking money is. But a note could.
• 1:01:22
  Be good, but like I said, there's silent alarms.
• 1:01:24
  I would want nobody to move. Stop it.
• 1:01:27
  Otherwise stop. You wouldn't take control of the
• 1:01:28
  situation. But you'd want to be likable, so
• 1:01:30
  if you're. Going to be a bank robber, you
• 1:01:31
  have to be a likable bank robber.
• 1:01:34
  But be back to. Like like like.
• 1:01:36
  So you're nice about. It yeah, you wouldn't be like,
• 1:01:39
  yeah, well, I don't even get why, like people who even work
• 1:01:43
  at a bank pass out, pass out a couple.
• 1:01:47
  Bucks on the way out be like hey man, here's like slip somebody a
• 1:01:49
  gene be like hey man, look like you.
• 1:01:52
  You know I was. Nah, No, no, no.
• 1:01:55
  Tell him I was. Tell him I was.
• 1:01:56
  Like, Oh no, I'm. Robbing a bank, dude, I'm, I'm
• 1:01:59
  coming out with the money and well, you would, but then, you
• 1:02:02
  know, I'm not, I'm not like tipping people like on the way
• 1:02:04
  out. That'd be epic.
• 1:02:06
  You'd be a legend. They'd be like, OK, I just the
• 1:02:08
  tipping robber. Like we'd have a cool ass
• 1:02:11
  nickname. At least it wouldn't be a Dick.
• 1:02:12
  No, I what I don't. Get is like like people who work
• 1:02:15
  at the bank who give a shit like about the money.
• 1:02:18
  It's like it's all insured. Yeah, it's a banks.
• 1:02:21
  Money, it's like, like, why do you even care?
• 1:02:23
  Like like whatever. There's like a security.
• 1:02:25
  Guard at CVS that's them to like.
• 1:02:27
  Well that's life for a pack of Mike and like so my bro just let
• 1:02:30
  the crack head take it. Well, that's what the mean DC
• 1:02:33
  Danny. Bob just says Danny, Chris, me,
• 1:02:36
  we're at P JS wedding and we were laughing about like how
• 1:02:40
  nobody gives a shit about anything anymore.
• 1:02:42
  You just like walk into a 711 and just like take shit and like
• 1:02:45
  they're just not going to stop you.
• 1:02:47
  Like and it's like, but in this case it's like it kind of makes
• 1:02:51
  sense to me. It's like, yeah, like why would
• 1:02:53
  you even you you're getting paid like minimum wage.
• 1:02:56
  Like why like it's fucking 711. Like, just let him take the hit,
• 1:03:01
  yeah. Don't be a hero.
• 1:03:02
  Not for them. Not for them, exactly.
• 1:03:08
  Yeah, but I mean moral of the. Story a If kids are playing in
• 1:03:13
  your neighborhood and ringing your doorbell and running away,
• 1:03:15
  don't fucking shoot them like what that is.
• 1:03:18
  So that's such a crazy leap. And it's not self-defense if
• 1:03:21
  somebody's running away. It's not no I know, but like.
• 1:03:25
  I thought it was going to be kind of racist, like because I
• 1:03:28
  didn't read the article and then you realize they were both
• 1:03:30
  Hispanic. And you were like oh shit, 3 for
• 1:03:32
  a whirl. Well, well.
• 1:03:34
  I I just but it's like because that shit's not in it, you know,
• 1:03:38
  it's like like black kids be getting like shot like like
• 1:03:41
  going, you know, going up to go like not even Ding Dong
• 1:03:44
  ditching. Like I think, I think it was a
• 1:03:45
  black guy. Who killed a white kid who got
• 1:03:47
  for Ding Dong ditching and then the other one was like a black
• 1:03:50
  guy killing another guy. What makes me feel?
• 1:03:51
  Better. Is that weird that it's like?
• 1:03:55
  Two Hispanics. Well, yeah, that it's not like.
• 1:03:58
  Some bullshit where they're like, yeah, it's not some like
• 1:04:01
  white. Guy shooting a black kid or
• 1:04:03
  something like through the door like.
• 1:04:05
  White lacrosse. Player, He's just trying to sell
• 1:04:07
  them like a magazine. Subscription.
• 1:04:09
  Yeah, this. They're just kind of like, hey,
• 1:04:10
  maybe. We should do something about it
• 1:04:12
  because it's just like they can't the race cancel each other
• 1:04:15
  out. It's like they're like, oh man,
• 1:04:17
  I just have to be sad about this.
• 1:04:19
  But also as. Parents don't let.
• 1:04:22
  Your kids Ding Dong bitch. Like are you fucking kidding me?
• 1:04:25
  I used to do this bro no. Stop it I.
• 1:04:29
  Didn't. Oh, no, no.
• 1:04:30
  I my parents never let me do it. It was always like on the sneak
• 1:04:36
  tip. Why is there an 11 year?
• 1:04:38
  Old running around at 11 like 23111.
• 1:04:43
  PM 100% like that's that's I did that.
• 1:04:49
  You ever get caught? Ding Dong.
• 1:04:52
  Ditching one time. We got caught teeping.
• 1:04:58
  For the audience, if they. Are I don't know if like people
• 1:05:00
  even know what that is anymore, but it's like throwing toilet
• 1:05:02
  paper and people's like trees. And it was like a girl that like
• 1:05:08
  we know I I just forget her name.
• 1:05:09
  She was like a year older than us, but her dad came out and
• 1:05:12
  like chased us like just like this.
• 1:05:16
  And three of us like hit in a Bush and.
• 1:05:21
  I just didn't. Like and he like came up on the
• 1:05:24
  Bush and the other two like guys like came out and like and he.
• 1:05:31
  Made him like go with him. Like go get the teepee out.
• 1:05:33
  And I just didn't move and he had no idea I was there.
• 1:05:36
  So I was just like, boom. One time I got caught teeping.
• 1:05:43
  Like the summer I lived with my dad was one of the craziest
• 1:05:47
  summers because I just did all sorts of wild shit.
• 1:05:51
  So we got caught. We got caught teeping this like
• 1:05:53
  empty lot because we were basically the only people that
• 1:05:56
  could do it. So we got confronted about it
• 1:05:58
  and we were just like, yeah, but we used to get little pump Talon
• 1:06:02
  pump paintball guns and we'd shoot paintballs at cars.
• 1:06:07
  That's a little wild, right? Ding Dong bitching you're.
• 1:06:11
  Ringing a fucking doorbell. The only problem there is, but
• 1:06:13
  that's what I'm saying is it escalates.
• 1:06:14
  Because at this point, because at this point I'm in like this
• 1:06:18
  is the summer going into eighth grade, 8th grade.
• 1:06:21
  So that's what I'm saying is like it escalates to where then
• 1:06:24
  it's like, OK, well, ringing doorbells isn't enough.
• 1:06:26
  Now we need to like what? What's more extreme than I can
• 1:06:29
  do to get a more ridiculous reaction out of people ended up
• 1:06:32
  on shooting paintballs at cars. Another one was that that to me
• 1:06:36
  that's. Like a little crazy.
• 1:06:37
  It's crazy. That's like a.
• 1:06:39
  That that's like. Exponentially worse.
• 1:06:42
  Yeah, I told you about the. Throwing tennis balls at cars.
• 1:06:45
  We got chased by those college kids.
• 1:06:47
  I got chased for like 6 hours and then Joseph and I used to
• 1:06:50
  garage. Up and steal people's beers in
• 1:06:52
  the garage because. Everybody in Texas.
• 1:06:56
  Or South Lake had by the time people were doing that.
• 1:06:58
  I'd really, I don't know, I guess I calmed down, but I
• 1:07:03
  wasn't as you were more of an enabler.
• 1:07:07
  So stuff like that. I wouldn't normally do that, but
• 1:07:10
  you could convince me to do almost anything.
• 1:07:12
  That's fair. That's right.
• 1:07:13
  So that's. Pretty much what it was your.
• 1:07:14
  Boy's a salesman. So when we.
• 1:07:16
  Finally linked up in that. Way it was bad news Bears or
• 1:07:19
  these good times I actually picked out like.
• 1:07:21
  And pretty much, yeah, I mean, but we got in a.
• 1:07:24
  Car chase with that like no. No, no, no, no.
• 1:07:26
  It got it got really crazy. But but the Baby Driver lyricist
• 1:07:30
  got us out of there. Yeah, you see some stupid.
• 1:07:33
  Shit. And then another one was shoot
• 1:07:36
  bottle rockets, but that was pretty rough 'cause you have to
• 1:07:39
  like point them so you would get like a Corona long neck bottle
• 1:07:43
  'cause like at my dad's house there was this balcony that had
• 1:07:46
  this huge like weeping Willow tree.
• 1:07:48
  And this is in Waxahachie. So it over which is a city,
• 1:07:52
  which is a city in Texas where we're from.
• 1:07:56
  As I was a student to say, it's. Important to say, but it would.
• 1:08:00
  Overhang, so the angle on it, you could see the road, but you
• 1:08:04
  couldn't see shit like it was. So it was like awesome.
• 1:08:07
  And it was tucked back off the roads.
• 1:08:09
  There was like a big yard, big double sidewalk, another median,
• 1:08:13
  then there was the road. So it was a distance.
• 1:08:15
  That's what I'm saying. You get a little pump gun and
• 1:08:18
  people are flying by. So you would take the you'd
• 1:08:21
  light the bottle rocket, then you would have to look away and
• 1:08:24
  point it and then see both. Both like when I think now about
• 1:08:28
  Ding Dong ditching and then fireworks, I think about my dog
• 1:08:33
  how she like just. Hey, both of them, yeah.
• 1:08:38
  And in that I would just never do it based upon that.
• 1:08:41
  Like I want fireworks to like just end.
• 1:08:44
  But there was He's terrified. Just so I was shaking.
• 1:08:47
  One time I got in a good foot. Chase because in this is all in
• 1:08:51
  like like the TP ING the paintballs, the bottle rot.
• 1:08:56
  All this happens in like a 8 by 8 block area.
• 1:09:00
  It's like a pretty small terrorizing our neighborhood.
• 1:09:03
  Because if you went. Too far.
• 1:09:05
  If you went past McPherson St., where I was, no, it was like
• 1:09:10
  like trap. We're doing very specific, like
• 1:09:14
  it was trap houses. No SO.
• 1:09:15
  My dad was like, you do whatever the fuck you want, but don't
• 1:09:17
  ever go past McPherson St. and like and don't ever go down the
• 1:09:21
  railroad down to the railroad tracks, which was like big facts
• 1:09:24
  because I did. And I was like, bro, this shit's
• 1:09:26
  crazy. But we was like, you know, don't
• 1:09:29
  go to don't go past MacPherson Street.
• 1:09:33
  But then there was the big Rd. like College Street, which is
• 1:09:36
  where, you know, we'd shoot stuff at.
• 1:09:37
  Behind it, there was this replica Bethlehem.
• 1:09:40
  It was huge. And it had these big like it was
• 1:09:43
  what? A replica of.
• 1:09:45
  The city of Bethlehem, like the entire.
• 1:09:47
  City or like it was like many or like.
• 1:09:50
  Jesus like it. Was many, but it was.
• 1:09:52
  Probably like Nazareth. Yards long 50.
• 1:09:56
  Yards wide, Christian Yeah, So there was a big.
• 1:10:00
  It was like a. Big lot that they and they had.
• 1:10:02
  These huge fucking walls, like they were big.
• 1:10:05
  They were probably 20, no, about 15 feet tall, like walls that
• 1:10:11
  surround this thing. And at Christmas they would do a
• 1:10:13
  whole recreation. It was like for the church.
• 1:10:16
  So it's church owned property. Are there like 3-3 wise men
• 1:10:19
  statues? But it was like, no, it was like
• 1:10:20
  a there was like. A marketplace.
• 1:10:22
  It was like big as fuck. And it was all these buildings.
• 1:10:24
  So we used to break in there and fuck around 'cause you could
• 1:10:27
  just climb the wall, you could climb this tree.
• 1:10:29
  It was a little sketchy. Get on the wall and you could
• 1:10:31
  just unlock it from the inside. So we would Dick around, we
• 1:10:34
  would find all this those tiki torch candles, they would have
• 1:10:39
  tons of those. So we there was this big Dome
• 1:10:42
  area. So we would take a bunch of hay
• 1:10:43
  and shit and start have like little like hangout fires in
• 1:10:46
  this place. And one night, bro, we are in
• 1:10:49
  there doing our fucked up thing just chilling like we're not
• 1:10:52
  doing anything. Nobody drinks at this point.
• 1:10:54
  We're just like a bunch of kids in like going in 8th grade with
• 1:10:59
  Jack shit to do and the maintenance man shows the fuck
• 1:11:05
  up bro. So we're sitting in there and
• 1:11:07
  there's like 2 gates. There's one on this side and
• 1:11:09
  then there's one on the opposite end and they're like 45 yards
• 1:11:15
  apart. Like they're not that.
• 1:11:16
  Close, but they're like. They're close.
• 1:11:18
  Like if you see somebody in there and you could see like the
• 1:11:22
  one that the one on the side wasn't as bad, but there's one
• 1:11:25
  that you could just see through the whole fucking place.
• 1:11:27
  And we went through the one on the side.
• 1:11:29
  Dude, we're sitting there chilling and we look over and
• 1:11:33
  this, he's a pretty big Hispanic dude, is just staring at us in
• 1:11:39
  like the glow of this fucking like mosquito repellent tiki
• 1:11:43
  torch shit and just takes the fuck off after us man.
• 1:11:48
  And this dude again, why would he even give a shit?
• 1:11:52
  Dude he chased us so not get paid enough bro to even care.
• 1:11:56
  We fucking. Scatter throughout the
• 1:11:58
  neighborhood. This dude is.
• 1:12:00
  Driving around in circles in this neighborhood, but we bolt.
• 1:12:04
  So he chases us for a bit. He has got, he's got to go back
• 1:12:07
  'cause like, we left that fire going dude, like you, just what
• 1:12:10
  are you doing? Let's put this out, then we'll
• 1:12:11
  figure it out. So he puts it out, comes and
• 1:12:14
  he's just spending forever spinning the block.
• 1:12:16
  We're like, I got in trouble 'cause I got home so late,
• 1:12:19
  'cause I I had no way to get back to my house without being
• 1:12:22
  spotted by this Hispanic. OK, a tax.
• 1:12:29
  Free check hits hard. Dude.
• 1:12:34
  It's like, it's like, it's like Chris Crispy boy, like
• 1:12:37
  McDonald's. Sprite.
• 1:12:41
  Article #2 Brought to you by the.
• 1:12:43
  BBC. The big black news
• 1:12:46
  correspondent, Germany's far right Afd suffers series of
• 1:12:52
  candidate deaths ahead of a local ahead of local vote.
• 1:12:56
  Super weird. This is from Paul Kirby.
• 1:13:02
  As many as six candidates. For Germany's far right.
• 1:13:06
  Afd have died in recent weeks ahead of local elections in the
• 1:13:10
  big western state of North Rhine W.
• 1:13:13
  What is it? Westafia police have made it
• 1:13:17
  clear there's no evidence of foul play in the deaths.
• 1:13:19
  Bullshit. But it means that new ballots
• 1:13:21
  will be have to be printed and some poster voters will have to
• 1:13:24
  recast their ballots. Population is 18,000,000
• 1:13:28
  reported 20,000 candidates will run for office and it's 14th of
• 1:13:31
  September local elections. But this is that's kind of weird
• 1:13:35
  that a bunch of the alt right like Nazi dudes are dying.
• 1:13:38
  You don't think so? I don't know, you tell.
• 1:13:42
  Me bro, I have an opinion. First of all, give 0.
• 1:13:50
  Fucks about that. But well, no.
• 1:13:53
  But I mean, it's still an interesting story.
• 1:13:55
  No, no, no, no. It's interesting.
• 1:13:56
  I give zero fucks about these not.
• 1:13:58
  These like, 'cause the AFD is like, first of all, Elon's like
• 1:14:02
  on their like jock and then, yeah, and they're like
• 1:14:06
  basically, literally like, like neo Nazis, yeah, very Nazis,
• 1:14:13
  right? So.
• 1:14:15
  I don't know, dude. Like here's the theory.
• 1:14:20
  This is all alleged I just throwing.
• 1:14:23
  This out there, did Israel not like, decapitate Iran's
• 1:14:31
  revolutionary? Guard corps Hamas.
• 1:14:34
  Hezbollah. Do you think it's weird that?
• 1:14:45
  As the same time Israel's like going after it that the.
• 1:14:52
  That the neo Nazis. Just start getting get murked.
• 1:14:58
  Yeah, the number of deaths. Says that they're nevertheless
• 1:15:01
  raised questions. On social media, the state's
• 1:15:03
  interior ministry has pointed out that the candidates for the
• 1:15:06
  parties, including Greens and Social Democrats, have also
• 1:15:09
  died. Domestic Spies agency classified
• 1:15:12
  it as a right wing extremist organization in May before
• 1:15:15
  placing a pause on that description due to appealing to
• 1:15:19
  an appeal pending in court. In three eastern states, the AFD
• 1:15:23
  associates are still listed as extremists.
• 1:15:27
  And like all the parties in in Germany like.
• 1:15:30
  Is like. Listening to this podcast, like
• 1:15:32
  pretty like pretty high of the rankings and all the parties in
• 1:15:37
  Germany besides the AFD agreed that they would never do
• 1:15:41
  business with the AFD, even though they get elected like
• 1:15:44
  they have like seats in parliament.
• 1:15:46
  They have the most seats they've ever had.
• 1:15:48
  And then just recently they were like making deals with them to
• 1:15:53
  get like shit passed. And that was like breaking like
• 1:15:57
  a a century old like rule. Like like it's like they knew
• 1:16:01
  that it's like they're they're a democracy, but they so they
• 1:16:06
  can't really do anything about these fools getting elected.
• 1:16:10
  But every other because it's a multi party.
• 1:16:13
  It's not like a two party system like us.
• 1:16:17
  Every every other party like had a pack that they would never
• 1:16:20
  ever make a deal with them up until like last year.
• 1:16:25
  Then it happened and the FT got the most seats and Elon Musk's
• 1:16:29
  over there, like promoting shit and like, like paying for like
• 1:16:33
  these dudes like elections. Yeah, but they're not buying his
• 1:16:36
  cars. So he's suffering.
• 1:16:37
  Well, Germany. Is not like this is.
• 1:16:39
  Yeah, like it's a. Like, it's a minority of a
• 1:16:42
  minority, like, like that are involved in this.
• 1:16:48
  However, they went from like, they had like 7% of like the
• 1:16:52
  parliament to like, like fucking 21%, you know, like tripled up
• 1:16:58
  like. And so it was like, kind of
• 1:17:00
  scary for everybody. Yeah.
• 1:17:04
  It's like and I. I I used to knew like.
• 1:17:06
  Off the top of my head, but it's like what it stands for.
• 1:17:10
  It's like the D part is Deutschland, which is Jeremy,
• 1:17:17
  but I forget what the AF part is.
• 1:17:18
  It's like. Anyways, yeah, these are just
• 1:17:22
  Nazis breeding card initial reports centered on.
• 1:17:27
  News that that four of its candidates have died and the
• 1:17:30
  deaths 2 of 2 reserve candidates also emerged, prompting a flurry
• 1:17:35
  of conspiracy theories on social media.
• 1:17:37
  Afd Co leader Alice Wendell made made no effort to quash the
• 1:17:43
  speculation, reposting a claim by retired economicus Stefan
• 1:17:46
  Homburg that a number of candidates deaths was
• 1:17:50
  statistically almost impossible. However, asked about the rumors
• 1:17:54
  in his part of the AF DS member #2 figure in North Rhine W
• 1:17:59
  Delphia K Gats Gatskalk, Gatskalk acknowledged on Tuesday
• 1:18:05
  that what I have in front of me, but that's just partial
• 1:18:09
  information. It doesn't back up these
• 1:18:11
  suspicious, these suspicions at the moment.
• 1:18:14
  I mean, what, what's the conspiracy there though?
• 1:18:15
  What did they say 'cause like I, I didn't even.
• 1:18:17
  They said they were killed but but.
• 1:18:21
  But by who doesn't? Say Afd pulled it.
• 1:18:25
  Yeah, 16%. In the state federal elections
• 1:18:28
  last February, which was like, like still.
• 1:18:33
  Not a huge amount, but it's like a lot more than it than it was
• 1:18:36
  like just like a couple years. They they originally in 2022
• 1:18:40
  pulled at 5.4. Percent, there you go, tripled
• 1:18:43
  up. So that's pretty.
• 1:18:46
  How was it not? Far off there, yeah.
• 1:18:49
  Either police agency. Said that the four initial
• 1:18:52
  deaths were either. From natural.
• 1:18:54
  Causes or the cause was not being divulged for reasons of
• 1:18:58
  family privacy. The two further deaths have been
• 1:19:01
  similarly described. Afd strategists are hoping for
• 1:19:05
  gains in the up in the local elections, which are seen as as
• 1:19:09
  the first Test of voters since the new federal government came
• 1:19:13
  to power, which, yeah, they just got a new.
• 1:19:17
  Because the. Their government like collapsed
• 1:19:23
  and when and when I say collapsed, I mean like, like
• 1:19:27
  they had like a Prime Minister and then like, you have to have
• 1:19:32
  like votes from the parliament or like their version of
• 1:19:35
  parliament, I forget what. Like, like it's like Israel's
• 1:19:38
  the Knesset in, in England. It's like the parliament.
• 1:19:42
  I, I figure what it's called in Germany.
• 1:19:44
  So what happened was whoever their Prime Minister was like
• 1:19:48
  didn't like have enough votes to be, still be Prime Minister.
• 1:19:53
  And then they just got a new one.
• 1:19:55
  His name's Mersk, I believe. But that's, but that was recent.
• 1:20:00
  But during that process is when the Afd got like gained way more
• 1:20:06
  seats. And, and again, like I said,
• 1:20:08
  it's like, like you just said it was like 15%, but that that's
• 1:20:13
  three times more than they had before and the most.
• 1:20:15
  And then they were trying to like, make deals with them and
• 1:20:18
  shit, like, just like Netanyahu makes deals with like the far
• 1:20:22
  right, like just to stay in office.
• 1:20:24
  Yeah. Yeah, tech billionaire Elon Musk
• 1:20:27
  Who? Endorsed the far right party's
• 1:20:29
  migration policies earlier this year, has repeated his support.
• 1:20:33
  Either Germany votes Afd or it's the end of Germany, is what he
• 1:20:38
  Elon Musk is claiming. It's a crazy statement.
• 1:20:41
  That's wow, that's out of. Bounds out of bounds.
• 1:20:44
  Elon I mean, it's just, it's like, to me, it's just like,
• 1:20:48
  that's all you need to know. About him, Yeah, he's a fucking
• 1:20:51
  idiot, but also like. Obviously like a white
• 1:20:54
  supremacist. Yeah.
• 1:20:56
  Therapy question or not therapy question, I'm so.
• 1:20:58
  Used to that article #3 from MPRKERA.
• 1:21:02
  Donate donate donate. Trump says Space Command will
• 1:21:06
  move to Alabama Alabama, Alabama after a long battle over its HQ.
• 1:21:12
  This is by Pat Duggan's Let's go.
• 1:21:16
  Just change the D Make it an H. We all over the place, they call
• 1:21:20
  me Curb 'cause you can't walk these streets without bumping
• 1:21:23
  into me, Don. President Trump announced he
• 1:21:26
  intends to move the US Space Command headquarters to
• 1:21:29
  Huntsville, AL, in an Oval offense announcement on Tuesday.
• 1:21:33
  This is not the first time Trump Trump intended to move the Space
• 1:21:37
  Command to Alabama permanently. During the final days of his
• 1:21:41
  first term, he announced his choice over other locations,
• 1:21:45
  saying he personally made that decision.
• 1:21:48
  And in 2023, the Biden Joe fucking Brandon administration
• 1:21:53
  said they'd the move could put military readiness at risk.
• 1:21:57
  The latest switch by Trump has been long anticipated since
• 1:22:02
  Biden chose to keep the organization at the Peterson Air
• 1:22:05
  Force Base in Colorado Springs. Right.
• 1:22:08
  So a couple things here like. First of all, Trump's the.
• 1:22:11
  One who fucking came up. This is we're talking about
• 1:22:15
  Space Force, right? Yeah.
• 1:22:19
  OK, well, Trump. Created Space Force.
• 1:22:21
  Everybody clowned him on it. And then like, and then like, in
• 1:22:24
  retrospect, we were like, man, not a bad idea.
• 1:22:27
  But Space Force was always a part of the Air Force.
• 1:22:30
  And that's where the Air Force's main headquarters is.
• 1:22:33
  And that's why it was a Colorado.
• 1:22:36
  So, like, to me, this is like, not I, I heard about this, but I
• 1:22:39
  to me, like, I don't think it's like overblown like that.
• 1:22:43
  You know, it's like, it's like, like he's the one who even came
• 1:22:46
  up with the fucking ideas of the Space Force.
• 1:22:48
  Like, why do you guys like Trump was joined by Alabama's US
• 1:22:52
  senators, Tommy. Tuberville right off the bat
• 1:22:55
  you're wrong. If that guy shows up, he's
• 1:22:57
  moving space command to Alabama's so-called Rocket City
• 1:23:00
  could benefit the local economy by bringing in thousands of jobs
• 1:23:04
  and billions of dollars in investments.
• 1:23:06
  But he did say some pretty wild shit about it.
• 1:23:09
  See I haven't seen that part. I just like.
• 1:23:11
  To me it's like. OK.
• 1:23:13
  Like it could have just been in Alabama.
• 1:23:15
  The move. Yeah, Huntsville.
• 1:23:17
  Yeah, the move has political. Implications as well.
• 1:23:20
  Alabama is a reliably Republican, where the voters
• 1:23:24
  support all three of Trump's campaigns for the White House.
• 1:23:28
  One of his first political rallies in 2015 was in Mobile,
• 1:23:31
  AL along the Gulf Coast. God damn it boy, come on man
• 1:23:36
  play. Tuesday's gone with the win.
• 1:23:37
  Let's get out of here. I'm just saying like, like, what
• 1:23:40
  is the issue? Who cares?
• 1:23:42
  Colorado has become increasingly Democratic since 2000. 8
• 1:23:46
  presidential election Earlier this year, Colorado's Republican
• 1:23:49
  Congress members wrote a letter to Trump asking him not to
• 1:23:52
  relocate operations. During his announcement, Trump
• 1:23:56
  noted that the political dynamic noted these political dynamics,
• 1:24:00
  but said. I don't think that influenced my
• 1:24:02
  decision though, right? He also said that one of the big
• 1:24:07
  problems he has with Colorado is the state's embrace of mail in
• 1:24:11
  voting. They have an automatically
• 1:24:13
  crooked elections. Trump criticized, well,
• 1:24:16
  criticism. Colorado was also the first
• 1:24:18
  state that. Decided to take him off of the
• 1:24:22
  ballot because he violated the Constitution by having so now
• 1:24:27
  he's so he was, he was like actually constitutionally not
• 1:24:30
  even allowed to run again. And they were right.
• 1:24:32
  But then the Supreme Court rejected that.
• 1:24:36
  So I can see that, but I have no idea why.
• 1:24:37
  What, like why any of that would matter when it comes to the
• 1:24:41
  Space Force? Like, well, you know, you
• 1:24:43
  wouldn't think that it would. But then he brings up.
• 1:24:46
  He brings. It up.
• 1:24:47
  Yeah, I know. Like see this is and then the
• 1:24:49
  right. Question mark.
• 1:24:51
  This is what I'm trying. To say is like.
• 1:24:53
  It's like. I I don't understand who comes
• 1:24:56
  up with these ideas because it's not him.
• 1:25:00
  Like, do you think Trump? Is like is like thinking deeply
• 1:25:04
  about like. You know what Space Force should
• 1:25:07
  really be in a red state? And like, like I think about
• 1:25:11
  shit like this and I don't even understand what the difference
• 1:25:14
  would well, but I think that people are like, hey, we should
• 1:25:17
  move it here. And they use stuff like that,
• 1:25:20
  like mail in voting. They know how to push his
• 1:25:23
  buttons and get him to the point where he's like, yeah, we should
• 1:25:25
  do that. So I think it takes very much.
• 1:25:27
  I'm just wondering who. I'm just wondering who is
• 1:25:30
  thinking. Of stuff like this and and why,
• 1:25:33
  you know what I'm saying? Oh yeah, I know.
• 1:25:36
  It's even the puppet master. I know.
• 1:25:38
  I just, I just want to be there like for that conversation where
• 1:25:41
  it's like, like, you know, the Santa Monica fascist, Stephen
• 1:25:45
  Miller's like, hey, we got like, we got to get Space Force.
• 1:25:50
  Out of Colorado. And into Alabama, and This is
• 1:25:53
  why I want to I want, I want to hear his sales pitch 'cause it
• 1:25:58
  'cause it doesn't even make sense to me that I don't think
• 1:26:01
  it has to be that good. He's a guess.
• 1:26:02
  Steven, what do you have for me? I know, but like.
• 1:26:04
  What the fuck is the reason? Like it was.
• 1:26:06
  Why? I have a delicious plan for you,
• 1:26:09
  dude, Dude, it. Like it's like hard or?
• 1:26:12
  Retarded bro. It's like OK, Space Force is in
• 1:26:16
  Alabama. It's still fucking.
• 1:26:17
  United States. True.
• 1:26:22
  Last article Devotees. Say Bolivia's lightning struck.
• 1:26:26
  Miracle Tree. Conjures luck.
• 1:26:29
  This is by the API. Wanted that on a good note.
• 1:26:32
  La Paz, Bolivia, the capital struck by lightning during a
• 1:26:37
  roaming thunderstorm 10 years. Ago an ancient.
• 1:26:39
  Pine tree in Bolivia's capital La Paz is thriving.
• 1:26:43
  Known as the Miracle Tree, this giant conifer now draws devotees
• 1:26:47
  from across the country to La Paz largest is its largest
• 1:26:52
  public cemetery, founded 2 centuries ago in a pre Columbian
• 1:26:56
  burial plot. Pilgrims streamed through the
• 1:26:59
  alleyways bearing offerings, coins, flowers, sweets,
• 1:27:02
  handwritten disclosures of secret wishes.
• 1:27:04
  Oh, to the bark crevasses. Would you go visit this?
• 1:27:10
  Miracle Tree I kind of want to see like there's.
• 1:27:11
  Nothing like that would. I go to Bolivia to to go to a
• 1:27:14
  cemetery. Because the lightning, is that
• 1:27:19
  right? I mean the guy who wrote this,
• 1:27:22
  Carlos. Valdez like crushed this on a
• 1:27:24
  chilly afternoon last week during the then the throes of an
• 1:27:28
  election season, pilgrims made their way through the miracle
• 1:27:33
  tree, through the winding alleys, the cemetery packed with
• 1:27:35
  over 20,200 thousand graves. Jesus, many of them belong to
• 1:27:39
  decorated soldiers. I mean, that's going to tell you
• 1:27:43
  I like this because we don't have anything like this here.
• 1:27:46
  There's no like lucky miracle tree in like a 2000 year old in
• 1:27:52
  the US, is it said 200 years old.
• 1:27:55
  First of all, you said 2. Centuries.
• 1:27:57
  Oh no, that's the cemetery's been there for that sort of
• 1:28:00
  thing. Also, like the fucking like
• 1:28:06
  forest up here in Norcal, like all those trees that are like
• 1:28:09
  2000 years old. But when I'm trying to think,
• 1:28:11
  are they lucky? Are they covered in candy and
• 1:28:13
  notes? Do they have notes?
• 1:28:14
  In their corboses don't think they do doubt it.
• 1:28:18
  They're not the Redwood forest. That's what I.
• 1:28:23
  Was thinking dude no dude no fuck that.
• 1:28:29
  Remember that time that that older Bolivians when I lived in
• 1:28:34
  Santa Monica and crazy shit happened to me with like the
• 1:28:39
  girl who's like getting like sex traffic.
• 1:28:41
  I was just trying to help her out and get her out here.
• 1:28:43
  As soon as I finally I got her like the Uber, I went back into
• 1:28:48
  my apartment and lighting struck the fucking building like like
• 1:28:54
  almost at the exact same time that I like handled it and and
• 1:29:00
  it it was like it was a it was like a spiritual moment for me.
• 1:29:05
  It was like, that is just too weird.
• 1:29:08
  So I get that part, but no, I'm not going to obliviate it.
• 1:29:13
  Just people ask for love, work, health, children.
• 1:29:18
  Even to bring back their lost pets.
• 1:29:20
  If the person comes with a lot of faith, the tree will fulfill
• 1:29:24
  their wishes. Get the fuck out of you.
• 1:29:25
  Some of the devotees were young have reached Doctor Seuss.
• 1:29:28
  Narrating it or what discovered the.
• 1:29:30
  Tree on TikTok. Others were.
• 1:29:31
  Regulars older. Bolivians long convinced the
• 1:29:34
  trees of the tree's sacred powers, like a 70 year old
• 1:29:37
  prayer leader, Ricardo, who was taking refuge underneath the
• 1:29:42
  tree sheltering limbs when lightning struck on a stormy
• 1:29:46
  afternoon a decade ago. He claims the lightning bolt
• 1:29:48
  gave him psychic powers. Fuck yes.
• 1:29:51
  Oh, that's what I was going to ask you if you knew like you
• 1:29:54
  would. Survive and be fine from getting
• 1:29:56
  hit by lightning. Would you rather get hit by
• 1:29:59
  lightning or not? No issues, no nothing.
• 1:30:05
  Right. Oh, I mean like other.
• 1:30:07
  Than whatever the fuck happens, like in that moment when you get
• 1:30:11
  hit by lightning, like what? It like scorches your
• 1:30:13
  fingernails or whatever that, yeah, whatever that.
• 1:30:16
  Feels like fries you but like. But they but you're gonna
• 1:30:19
  survive. Make a full.
• 1:30:20
  Recovery. Yeah, 100% fine.
• 1:30:22
  Like it never. Happened.
• 1:30:24
  But it but. It happens, but you had to go.
• 1:30:27
  Through the maybe biggest bar story.
• 1:30:29
  And so that's what I was that that that's what I struck by a
• 1:30:32
  lightning. And so it'd be like and then
• 1:30:34
  your buddy be like, no, he. Did she was crazy like, oh,
• 1:30:37
  let's go, dude. It's like static shock.
• 1:30:41
  That's my super. That's what I'm saying.
• 1:30:43
  I might want to get. I I might.
• 1:30:45
  I might. Want to get struck by a
• 1:30:46
  lighting? Like it's like getting bitten by
• 1:30:48
  a shark. If like you didn't lose like a
• 1:30:50
  limb or something, like you kind of just become cooler.
• 1:30:58
  Far from pulverizing. The tree the rogue bolt of
• 1:31:01
  lightning left. A scar on its trunk that now
• 1:31:04
  oozes aromatic resin. The towering tree in La Paz
• 1:31:07
  Cemetery now appears healthier than ever.
• 1:31:10
  Look at that, dude. It's super.
• 1:31:11
  I'm telling you, bro, we gotta go check it out.
• 1:31:15
  Like, like, yeah, OK. I know.
• 1:31:17
  People have been healed from illness.
• 1:31:19
  They were all so. Devout.
• 1:31:21
  That's like seeing like Jesus Christ in your like, grilled
• 1:31:24
  cheese, like toast or something. The Lightning.
• 1:31:27
  Transmits the vital energy of the cosmos.
• 1:31:30
  That's some deep shit you know how to explain to.
• 1:31:36
  Someone who is over 30 years old and graduated from UCLA.
• 1:31:44
  In three years. That Thunder is the sound of
• 1:31:51
  lightning. Yeah.
• 1:31:53
  They didn't know that until I told them.
• 1:31:57
  Yeah. That's where you can time it.
• 1:31:59
  No. And I know that like, like they
• 1:32:03
  like a smart person. In their 30s.
• 1:32:06
  And did not. Where do they grow up, Ventura?
• 1:32:12
  It's believable. Believable.
• 1:32:16
  That, that, that. They didn't know that like
• 1:32:19
  lightning. Callie boy from Ventura.
• 1:32:21
  Not a boy. I didn't say a boy.
• 1:32:22
  It's. Where's Mom?
• 1:32:23
  It's my dog's. It's my.
• 1:32:26
  My baby Mama. Oh, OK.
• 1:32:29
  Like like. I told her like she was like.
• 1:32:32
  Saying something, I was like, wait, you understand that like
• 1:32:35
  Thunder is the sound of lightning, right?
• 1:32:38
  And she didn't know. And I was like, it blew my mind.
• 1:32:43
  Like how? Like how do you not get that
• 1:32:45
  information by the time you're 35 or whatever the fuck like
• 1:32:50
  that? Good.
• 1:32:50
  Just like talk about like a blind spot.
• 1:32:54
  Like blew me away. I was like like nobody, nobody
• 1:33:02
  told you this. Her dad was a science teacher.
• 1:33:07
  I might have just assumed she already knew.
• 1:33:10
  Somebody. Somebody.
• 1:33:13
  Had to tell you that. That's that's what I'm saying at
• 1:33:16
  no point in your. Life did any like you never like
• 1:33:21
  and and it just you I still to this day I'm going to actually
• 1:33:25
  like text her like like tomorrow and be like like what the fuck
• 1:33:29
  did you think Thunder was and why would they happen at the
• 1:33:33
  same time? Yeah, makes sense.
• 1:33:38
  Yeah, but fun facts y'all every was it.
• 1:33:41
  Every minute is a mile of where the light.
• 1:33:46
  Like when you hear the Thunder, is it a minute or is that a
• 1:33:50
  second? Second.
• 1:33:53
  Yeah. So it's like I don't.
• 1:33:55
  Know if it's? Yeah, whatever.
• 1:33:56
  It is like, but you were right with the timing where it's like
• 1:33:59
  you can tell how far away that light is.
• 1:34:01
  The lighting is based upon and it's like exact like when you
• 1:34:06
  hear the Thunder or you see the lighting, then you hear the
• 1:34:10
  Thunder. That's how like, you know, like
• 1:34:12
  where the storm is like an imagine Dragon Song lightning or
• 1:34:16
  your boy or your boy Bill Paxton.
• 1:34:21
  Dude I got YouTube. I got YouTube.
• 1:34:25
  TV and I'm like digging it and twisters on there I don't know I
• 1:34:32
  saw it on there and I was like the original Paxton RIP.
• 1:34:35
  He literally said that out loud and then just kept searching.
• 1:34:38
  But you know, I mean, that's a boy.
• 1:34:41
  That's all I got, that that's his favorite actor.
• 1:34:43
  That's all I got. Motherfucker, one of them, he's
• 1:34:46
  in everything he's in. He's an alien.
• 1:34:49
  Predator. He's in all.
• 1:34:50
  He's in all. The movies.
• 1:34:52
  Apollo 13, he's in a lot of fucking movies, no?
• 1:34:55
  Yeah, no, I, I just. Want to say like that you.
• 1:34:58
  Appreciate him more than I think anybody else on the planet.
• 1:35:03
  Impossible. They just don't know.
• 1:35:08
  They haven't. They haven't.
• 1:35:09
  Opened the new twisters over twisted their 4th eye.
• 1:35:13
  The Paxton eye dude the. Paxton Eye.
• 1:35:15
  They haven't opened. That yet when they do, they'll
• 1:35:18
  see. They'll see.
• 1:35:21
  Nah dude, he's might as well be just like Dennis Quaid.
• 1:35:25
  How dare you? Dennis Quaid's insane, you know
• 1:35:28
  they were fighting for. Roles though, like against each
• 1:35:30
  other, like that same person. Oh yeah, and Bill Paxton won for
• 1:35:33
  sure. Paul Paxton for life.
• 1:35:35
  Bill Paxton, Dennis Quaid, And then what's his racist?
• 1:35:38
  Ass Kevin Costner, Yeah. Those three to me like.
• 1:35:44
  Might as well just be the same person.
• 1:35:46
  How dare you? Well.
• 1:35:50
  I know that. How about this every single
• 1:35:53
  time? There was a role that one of
• 1:35:54
  those guys got. The other two didn't get it for
• 1:35:58
  that role. Yeah, yeah, OK.
• 1:36:00
  I agree with that. That's all I was saying.
• 1:36:02
  You got anything? Else mad Tay bitches.
• 1:36:04
  Make sure y'all like. Follow Subscribe.
• 1:36:07
  Leave a comment. Share whatever we appreciate
• 1:36:11
  y'all and shout out Kimberly. McGinnis.
• 1:36:13
  Whoever. That keeps popping up and has
• 1:36:15
  been watching our show every time and like leaves like
• 1:36:18
  comments just like, hey, what's up, said Beavis.
• 1:36:20
  And butt head Ding Dong ditch was legit.
• 1:36:29
  Shout out Kim, don't be good, stay safe and.
• 1:36:37
  Everybody go fuck yourselves.