Latest / A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast / Talks to Leee McEnememememy & Cameron from The Polis Box about their choice of Enlightenment (1/4)

Transcript

Talks to Leee McEnememememy & Cameron from The Polis Box about their choice of Enlightenment (1/4) · A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast

• 0:48
  Welcome back to Hamster with a Blunt Pen Knife, the Doctor Who
• 0:52
  commentary podcast that's certainly no stranger to Seaman
• 0:55
  Stains. It's all hands on deck tonight
• 0:58
  as we set sail for the 5th Doctor episode of Enlightenment,
• 1:03
  a buccaneering John on the high seas for Peter Davison and Cole
• 1:06
  from series 20 of Doctor Who. You might not recognise my voice
• 1:10
  and wonder where the Hell's Joe Ford I am, Lee Mcmenamy and I'm
• 1:14
  joined tonight by a motley crew of ephemerals who we all love a
• 1:16
  sailor. So allow me to introduce you to
• 1:19
  the landlubbers that are going to help us steer through our
• 1:21
  course for this episode. First up from my crew of very
• 1:24
  petty officers on the post box Live, it's my first mate Cameron
• 1:28
  Phillips. Hi, how are you doing?
• 1:34
  I like how you're so verbose and he just does like 2 words.
• 1:38
  All right, Scottish, we don't do Florida language.
• 1:45
  Can you call him? Can you call him Lassie
• 1:47
  throughout this call please? I just love that.
• 1:49
  One never stop now I'll never stop.
• 1:51
  Calling Oh no, I meant him to you.
• 1:53
  Sorry. Oh, that's fine.
• 1:54
  OK, I'll go with that. Well, it's it's special request,
• 1:58
  isn't it? It's rather nice to see.
• 2:03
  Also joining us tonight, last but not least, it's the man who
• 2:06
  can always be found frigging in the rigging, steering the ship
• 2:10
  as ablaze only he can. It's everyone's favorite
• 2:12
  captain. He's a one and only Mr. Joe
• 2:14
  Ford. Freaking in the rigging.
• 2:17
  Yeah, my God, you put some effort into these, don't you?
• 2:22
  But yeah, really, if I been in the position of being here on a
• 2:25
  Saturday night with such gentlemen with the the most
• 2:28
  incredible hair I've ever seen in my life and also a man who,
• 2:34
  let's be honest, an indeterminate state of emotional
• 2:37
  and sexual relationship with Mr. Cameron there.
• 2:40
  Yeah. This is so incestuous now we may
• 2:45
  as well just call ourselves the Hamster Polish Box.
• 2:47
  I mean, you did marry him so. I know we had children.
• 2:50
  We broke up, we got back together again.
• 2:53
  I'm going Warren and Suntarans cab.
• 2:55
  I've got more news for you. All right.
• 2:57
  Oh God, OK, looking forward to that.
• 3:00
  You're listening to the Doctor Who podcast equivalent of
• 3:02
  Hollyoaks. We're going polygamous, all
• 3:05
  right. Wow.
• 3:07
  It's somebody that you know, though.
• 3:08
  Don't worry, it'll be an easy transition.
• 3:11
  As long as I know of them, that's fine.
• 3:13
  You know, eating gently and all that.
• 3:15
  So to speak. Did you What?
• 3:20
  What we're here for? Oh yeah, enlightenment.
• 3:22
  Yes, yes, that's why we're here tonight.
• 3:24
  Not just to flirt outrageously and be silly.
• 3:26
  No, no, no, yeah. But you've got my slightly
• 3:28
  bundled execution of the intro there.
• 3:30
  Yeah, it's like. God, I love your intros.
• 3:33
  Although, you know, I wish we'd had a little video as well, like
• 3:35
  you do for the Polish box. They just make my day when you
• 3:38
  put on the music of the time, you know, and all the news clips
• 3:41
  and everything. Nobody puts as much effort into
• 3:44
  the start of a podcast. And Julie?
• 3:46
  I try, I try my best. I have to be good at something,
• 3:48
  Joe, because it's also about laughter.
• 3:49
  I start speaking so. How many times can I mention the
• 3:52
  Polish box on this call to do like extreme marketing to get
• 3:55
  everybody in the world that way? Joe, why would you do that to
• 3:59
  people? That's a good point, yeah.
• 4:04
  Can I drop something really controversial right at the start
• 4:07
  of the call? Of course.
• 4:08
  Yeah, why not? One of you may leave, but that's
• 4:11
  fine, the rest of us can talk. I sat and watched the 75 minute
• 4:18
  Fiona coming. Apparently directed but I'm not
• 4:20
  entirely sure. Special edition version of
• 4:23
  Enlightenment today and it confirmed a long held belief of
• 4:28
  mine. Man, it's better than the
• 4:30
  original. Fuck me, every classic Doctor
• 4:33
  Who story could do with 20 minutes of flab cut out of it.
• 4:37
  It gets to all the pertinent points so quickly.
• 4:41
  They've added a really dark that the score's already good for
• 4:44
  this, but they've added extra dynamism to the score.
• 4:47
  I mean, it seeks in and out of that the the editing of the
• 4:51
  individual scenes is a lot sharper.
• 4:53
  And I know, I know back then they wouldn't have done that.
• 4:56
  And that's just how TV was done at the time.
• 4:59
  But jeez, I'd be happy for a 75 minute cut of just about every
• 5:02
  single four part Doctor Who story.
• 5:05
  I don't know. It it it's.
• 5:07
  Just it's better telly. I don't know if it's a better
• 5:10
  version of the story, but I definitely think it's better
• 5:13
  telly. Discuss.
• 5:14
  That's, well, there's a lot to be said for these Omnimus
• 5:16
  editions. God quite like them as well.
• 5:18
  On the proviso that Bain Cook is not allowed anywhere near them.
• 5:21
  With his chaos you mean? Yes, yeah, of the crime.
• 5:25
  It's just, you know. I think they're sort of fat felt
• 5:28
  pens actually. It's not allowed things but
• 5:31
  pointy edges, so yeah. Is that right?
• 5:33
  Yeah. Cameron, have you seen the the
• 5:36
  cut down version? I have not.
• 5:38
  I did. Until like literally 2 minutes
• 5:40
  ago I did not even know this existed.
• 5:43
  Yeah, it's very funny 'cause on the documentary you got off your
• 5:45
  owner coming there, right? And she's with the fellow who's
• 5:47
  obviously doing all the CGI, all the editing and everything.
• 5:51
  He's going. Well, we thought we'd do this,
• 5:53
  you know, because he's he's the modern day sort of cutter of
• 5:56
  television. We thought we did this and she's
• 5:57
  going she's got a pencil just like this and she's going yes,
• 6:01
  yes. So when they say sort of
• 6:03
  redirected by Fiona Cumming, it's she sat in the room, had a
• 6:07
  lunch and said yes every now and again just.
• 6:09
  Well, you do. Yeah, we'll do that.
• 6:11
  It'll be fine. Yeah.
• 6:12
  It's a good way of marketing it though, isn't it?
• 6:14
  By saying that she's she had another go at it, another pass.
• 6:17
  Basically, Fiona, you know, that's really hard work you put
• 6:19
  in 20 years ago. We're just going to chop at
• 6:20
  least 3/4 of that. Yeah, I am curious to know what
• 6:25
  you chaps think of this story as a very unusual story.
• 6:29
  I think it was, it was it not kind of like when the call went
• 6:33
  out for people to come on to hamster to do like different
• 6:38
  Doctor Who stories. It was me that kind of went
• 6:40
  let's do enlightenment. Why?
• 6:44
  Enlightenment, right? Has this thing for me of being
• 6:49
  the the kind of strangest polarized Doctor Who story in
• 6:54
  that it's about a race. Yeah, it's absolutely slow as
• 6:59
  fuck. And I just cannot reconcile
• 7:04
  those two things together in any way at all.
• 7:08
  And there is so much of this story that feels like some kind
• 7:12
  of like night nurse induced fever dream that you've got when
• 7:18
  you were a kid and your mum's tried to basically just dope you
• 7:21
  up with like medicine and turn the heating on to sweat the flu
• 7:24
  out here. Were you that annoying that she
• 7:26
  was dosing you up with nightmares every night?
• 7:29
  My mum's usual tactic was, you know, just to kind of like stick
• 7:33
  the heating on it or high in the room, stick the like, you know,
• 7:36
  blame up with Calpol. I've had a drip of like Pepto
• 7:40
  Bismol that went into my neck, you know?
• 7:42
  God, that was flying stuff, wasn't it?
• 7:44
  Do you remember that? They're bringing Pepto Bismol
• 7:47
  back in a big way if you don't walk past the chemist lately.
• 7:49
  No, I wasn't today. Sorry.
• 7:52
  We're going off in lineman already.
• 7:53
  There was this enormous fucking bowl of Pepto Misfo with the
• 7:57
  Pepto Bismols in it. I was like, oh God, it's like
• 8:00
  everything that scares me from my childhood.
• 8:02
  And it was like the giant robot. Oh, no, thank you.
• 8:06
  That's not been long since. Had the world taken over by
• 8:08
  Gavis? Gone, But no.
• 8:10
  Bloody. Bismol rises again.
• 8:13
  The pink one rises again. Frequently around those parts,
• 8:18
  yes. What about you then, Lee?
• 8:20
  Do. You know what?
• 8:21
  I'm really glad that Cam said all that, because I was
• 8:23
  convinced that I'd picked Enlightenment and I was sitting
• 8:26
  watching it the other week thinking, why did I pick this?
• 8:30
  Oh wow. Thinking no no no, I don't mean
• 8:32
  that in a negative way. I was just genuinely really
• 8:34
  really puzzled as to why I picked this particular one.
• 8:37
  But having said that, I haven't watched it.
• 8:39
  This isn't 1. I normally go back to a lot, so
• 8:42
  I've found quite a lot to enjoy this one.
• 8:44
  But to use A, to use a podcast phrase that Mikey Smith might
• 8:48
  not appreciate, we'll get to that.
• 8:50
  I've got a very odd journey with enlightenment in that I loved it
• 8:54
  when I first watched it because I think it's stylish as hell.
• 8:57
  I think there's some lovely costumes and lovely sets and
• 9:00
  lovely music and nice direction and all this.
• 9:02
  And when I was younger, I just wanted Doctor Who to not be
• 9:04
  embarrassing. So, and this was not
• 9:07
  embarrassing to watch. Now, my mum sat down and watched
• 9:09
  this with me and went to my work that was halfway decent.
• 9:12
  And Linda Baron was in it, you know, from the sitcom.
• 9:14
  What's the sitcom? She's yeah, yeah.
• 9:16
  Open All Hours. He's going up the ladder, Open
• 9:18
  All Hours, I said. She's not Gladys Emmanuelle.
• 9:20
  God, she's got an amazing pair of tits, ain't she?
• 9:23
  I mean I. Could never know this.
• 9:27
  Oh, you wait, I'm going to be singing songs about those when
• 9:29
  we get there. And then I went through my
• 9:32
  teenage years, you know, when you sort of you decide suddenly
• 9:34
  you want to be controversial. And I hate everything that
• 9:36
  everyone loves. So I then you know this and
• 9:39
  Cursor Fenrick and I mean, I still hate that.
• 9:41
  But and and then I've now I've sort of got over myself and I'm
• 9:46
  like, actually, it's a really good bit of work.
• 9:48
  It's it's got some good ideas. It's thoughtful in places.
• 9:51
  It gives Tegan and Turlo something to do in the same
• 9:54
  story. It's a miracle.
• 9:55
  Davidson gets great moments. All of the actors are really
• 9:58
  strong. Lee John maybe not.
• 10:03
  They're gaining on us. Well, I've got plenty on leave
• 10:07
  on don't. You worry.
• 10:08
  Don't you worry about that can. You sing some imagination songs
• 10:11
  for us? Please.
• 10:12
  I don't actually know any. I don't know any.
• 10:15
  Oh, I've watched that recent Top of the Pops repeat in BBC Four
• 10:18
  and I'm pretty sure that we're in that.
• 10:19
  So I'll I'll go back from my memory banks and see if I can
• 10:22
  recall any. Maybe I should?
• 10:24
  Choose a performance. Send you the the final cut of
• 10:26
  this. You can pipe some in.
• 10:27
  You know of us dancing to imagination songs, Yeah.
• 10:32
  What should happen? Should we go and watch the first
• 10:34
  one and see what's happening? I think she's talking about
• 10:36
  Pepto Bismol a bit more. Yeah, it's all the exciting
• 10:40
  stuff on a Saturday night talking about and yes, it's.
• 10:43
  I've got coffee, I've got 2 hot Scottish guys here.
• 10:46
  That's all I want to do on a Saturday night.
• 10:48
  I'm ready. I've got the Grog Russians as
• 10:50
  well ready to go. What is that?
• 10:52
  That is roast coffee, rum and Coke.
• 10:56
  Roast coffee. Roast coffee?
• 10:57
  Yeah, sounds delicious. Well, I'd be like product
• 11:00
  placement on Hampstead and Vipul month payment.
• 11:03
  It's cracking rum. Oh.
• 11:05
  Yes, yeah, we sell that in the shop, but they can't really sell
• 11:09
  it. It's Nikki because it's a very
• 11:11
  odd shape, the bottle, it's really hard to conceal down your
• 11:13
  knickers so the cracker doesn't get stolen very often.
• 11:17
  That sounds like the words of a man who's tried.
• 11:20
  I don't drink, Cameron, what are you drinking tonight?
• 11:23
  I haven't got anything on me. Hold on, I've got the no.
• 11:27
  I've got my backpack next to me, so it's got me Robinsons.
• 11:30
  He just pulled out of this ass. He.
• 11:33
  Just he just reached round behind him and pulled out this
• 11:36
  massive ball. Brought the sample.
• 11:41
  For the benefit of doubt and you know, for those listening on
• 11:43
  audio, my sort of day-to-day backpack I have is a drink
• 11:47
  sticking downside of it was the back of my chair.
• 11:50
  So just that's where something remembered.
• 11:52
  I'm glad it's not a sample because if that's the colour of
• 11:54
  it, I'd be asking questions about your health, yeah.
• 11:57
  Definite you coming on that. Try and deflect as much as you
• 12:00
  like. Everyone seeing that bottle
• 12:02
  coming out of your ass now? Well, someone counts in.
• 12:04
  Well, yeah, let's go. But I should.
• 12:11
  You were supposed to do this one I totally took over on.
• 12:16
  It's just after all. Are we screen sharing this?
• 12:19
  So are we. Oh God, have you not even got
• 12:21
  the episode prepared, Lauren? No, because.
• 12:27
  Is off his face on Robinson my computer.
• 12:31
  Hang on, hang on. I'm sure you've got it your end
• 12:35
  right I've. I've got a little pop out ski
• 12:36
  for my I could. Rely on you.
• 12:40
  OK, here we go. You.
• 12:41
  Ready. I asked and you were like, Have
• 12:43
  you ever got an answer here? We go right now.
• 12:45
  Hang on. I just need to make you guys
• 12:47
  bigger on the screen. You've all gone really small
• 12:49
  now. This is great.
• 12:50
  Content. It's great, isn't it?
• 12:53
  This is what people pay the Petrie on money for.
• 12:56
  Better believe it. It's just bought me a sofa.
• 12:58
  All right? I'm not complaining too much.
• 13:01
  Thanks, guys. OK, OK.
• 13:03
  Are you can you see this now? Yes.
• 13:05
  Yes. What can you see?
• 13:06
  Can you see the stars? I the stars have made the day.
• 13:11
  Could you see my main screen? What can you see?
• 13:13
  I'm seeing your desktop if you're a.
• 13:15
  Star Trek? No, I've given you the wrong
• 13:17
  screen. Oh fuck.
• 13:20
  Hang on. Oh, his lesson in his doggy
• 13:21
  secret. It's a tricky.
• 13:23
  Tricky as well. That's a podcast bust.
• 13:26
  Well, you need Star Trek Podcast for fuck's sake.
• 13:28
  Of course I'm a trick, right? Can you see stars now?
• 13:32
  I I can see stars my. Fist is in deep enough, let's
• 13:36
  go. Someone counted saying please.
• 13:41
  OK and 321 Landa Hoy. I knew this was going to be
• 13:48
  chaos, for God's sake. Well, look, can I ask you both
• 13:53
  then what you think of the 5th Doctor?
• 13:54
  I actually don't know, really what the two of you, especially
• 13:57
  you, Lee, because you've never given opinion on your bloody
• 14:00
  one. I'm.
• 14:01
  Not allowed to. I'm the judge, I'm supposed to
• 14:03
  be impartial. Not to die, yeah.
• 14:05
  Do you know what? It's a bit odd with Davidson.
• 14:10
  I really like the 5th Doctor era, but I'm not not entirely
• 14:14
  smitten with Peter Davison. It just seems a bit kind of, I
• 14:19
  don't want to use the word bland, but there doesn't seem to
• 14:21
  be much range to his performance across all the episodes.
• 14:24
  It's not to say he's bad, because he's a very competent
• 14:28
  actor, but yeah, it's just not. We'll go to Doctor, but I love
• 14:32
  the era, which makes no sense. Seamus Jenkins, who's just
• 14:37
  created the Mar and Chess Club podcast devoted to his favorite
• 14:40
  doctor, Peter Davison, the 5th Doctor.
• 14:42
  Oh, sorry, has. Just had a conniption of it,
• 14:46
  Cameron. I like him.
• 14:50
  I, I, I think there's a certain kind of like, I think it's well
• 14:55
  also because Kyle likes him. He's like Kyle's favorite
• 14:57
  doctor, you know, be classic and modern.
• 15:01
  So I kind of go along with it for that.
• 15:04
  And Kyle always makes the point that he's the doctor you'd kind
• 15:07
  of want to travel with, and, you know, it'd be pretty chill.
• 15:10
  So it's like, yeah, it probably is.
• 15:13
  So yeah, I like him for that. And when we met him at Carlisle
• 15:15
  Comic Con a few years ago, he was like, really, really good
• 15:17
  with Kyle. So as a kind of person, I kind
• 15:21
  of respect via Davidson a lot for that reason.
• 15:24
  Yeah, himself is fine. He's a, he's a nice fella.
• 15:26
  But yeah, he's doctor. Yeah.
• 15:28
  I saw him at a Hastings Comic Con this year, like about two
• 15:31
  months ago. And the respect I had for him
• 15:33
  for his honesty, 'cause I initially just wanted a
• 15:37
  photograph with him. And then I realized that he
• 15:40
  would do personalized messages as a video.
• 15:42
  So I said, oh, will you introduce a podcast for me, My
• 15:45
  mate Luke? I just said there and he and he
• 15:48
  just looked up to me very seriously.
• 15:49
  And he went, that will be more money.
• 15:51
  I was like, I respect you're a businessman.
• 15:54
  How much? Respect the hustle.
• 15:56
  Respect the hustle. There was no hustling.
• 15:59
  I'll just have to pay, you know? Yeah.
• 16:02
  Can I ask you both why on Earth we don't turn the lights down in
• 16:05
  the TARDIS more often? How atmospheric is this?
• 16:07
  Yeah, it's so much better with dim lighting.
• 16:10
  This entire episode, just the way it's lit, is perfect to the
• 16:13
  story and. There are parts in this episode
• 16:15
  that are way too dark though, but we'll get to those.
• 16:18
  But you're. Sure, the contrast on your TV
• 16:20
  was up high enough. Well, you know, but here we are.
• 16:26
  No, I I love the fact that most these episodes started with
• 16:29
  bickering on the TARDIS somehow. And the way they link in from
• 16:33
  the last one, you know, yeah, Daleks, I sometimes think those
• 16:37
  mutated misfits will help me till the end of time or
• 16:40
  something like that, you know, in planning a fire.
• 16:42
  Just really driving home That's an ongoing deal with a clunky
• 16:45
  link to the previous episode. Smooth as anything late.
• 16:49
  I mean, but can we can we picture like Belinda and you
• 16:53
  know, the doctor in the last series sitting playing Kaplunk
• 16:57
  at the start of like, you know, an episode?
• 17:00
  I just, I could see in like the well, them going Oh my God, do
• 17:04
  you remember those fucking annoying fans we met in the last
• 17:06
  story? Oh God, they can say it every
• 17:10
  week, you know. Do you remember, do you remember
• 17:13
  last week when you culturally appropriated Nigeria?
• 17:16
  That was fun, wasn't it? You know, you could say things
• 17:19
  like that each week. It's Valentine, doll.
• 17:24
  It's Valentine. What a.
• 17:25
  Guy. Can anyone do the voice?
• 17:29
  You. Boy, that is the smoke.
• 17:35
  It's. Like he's in the room.
• 17:40
  I don't know if I'm scared or turned on a little bit of bone.
• 17:45
  This is the finest performance I've seen from you since we did
• 17:48
  the great Tea Bag Mystery. Yeah, you see, I've got, I've
• 17:51
  got acting chops, you know? Yeah, you know.
• 17:53
  Who should he play in that again?
• 17:55
  Miss Begbo and that one. Wasn't it Miss Begbo?
• 17:58
  Miss. Good voice, very greatly.
• 18:00
  I've forgotten what voice I had. You sort of went up like that.
• 18:05
  Did I? I didn't.
• 18:06
  Attach them immediately. You're yes.
• 18:09
  This man was robbed of a BAFTA. Who really was listeners?
• 18:12
  I was of a BAFTA was, yeah. Haven't you guys got Christmas
• 18:16
  decorations on your trees? Yeah, I thought.
• 18:19
  You meant right now it's August, so.
• 18:21
  What? You lost your mind.
• 18:23
  Because I've got one that looks like, you know, that sparkly
• 18:25
  white guardian that was just there.
• 18:27
  My Angel looks a bit like that on top of the tree every year.
• 18:30
  Isn't it really? Oh.
• 18:32
  Bless him. Now that looks very nice.
• 18:34
  Look at the TARDIS in the hold of the ship.
• 18:37
  It does. This is it the age?
• 18:39
  I love the fact that every single Doctor Who story, if
• 18:41
  someone has to stay a story like you, but they were in the TARDIS
• 18:44
  and they've landed somewhere strange, they have to kind of
• 18:46
  go. The air is breathable, as if at
• 18:48
  any point in Doctor they're going to go.
• 18:51
  It's toxic as fuck. Let's go.
• 18:53
  I think you're forgetting the adventures on the planet Vortis
• 18:56
  all right, where they had atmospheric density jackets.
• 19:00
  You know that completely. Forgotten.
• 19:03
  It was basically. Just an anorak that they wore,
• 19:05
  but. Pretty much.
• 19:08
  Now can we discuss Teegan's boob chew please?
• 19:11
  I think it would have missed this not to really, wouldn't it?
• 19:14
  Carry on. Yeah, Are you a fan?
• 19:18
  Yeah, I do. I to be honest, I'd love to say
• 19:22
  I've never even considered it in such a detailed manner.
• 19:27
  Have you not? I've really have turned you,
• 19:28
  haven't I? I've considered it quite a bit
• 19:30
  when I watched it earlier today. I think later on there's more to
• 19:36
  it, shall we say? Booby stupid.
• 19:39
  Yeah, that's a terrible costume though, isn't it?
• 19:41
  I can see why she was really unhappy wearing that.
• 19:43
  What? How do you get laced into it?
• 19:45
  Yes. So the car set it up I think.
• 19:47
  Yeah, Giant. See what?
• 19:49
  Is wrong with. You torture fashions.
• 19:52
  Here we go are. We supposed to think, then, that
• 19:55
  at the moment this is a historical Doctor Who story.
• 19:59
  Yes, yes, absolutely and. Was she convinced the first
• 20:02
  time? Yeah, the first time I ever saw
• 20:07
  enlightenment. Yeah, I could say that this
• 20:09
  would. I mean, it's it doesn't waste
• 20:12
  any time revealing that it's not a traditional sea fading ship
• 20:16
  because it's what the next few minutes, isn't it?
• 20:18
  When there's like or is it? No, it's the cliffhanger.
• 20:21
  It's the first cliffhanger. Oh, that's it.
• 20:23
  Yes, Cliff, I thought there was something that happens here,
• 20:25
  wasn't it? When it.
• 20:25
  Was a great one as well. Where he goes, it's not a
• 20:28
  sailing ship, it's a spaceship. That's that one, right?
• 20:32
  Cliffhanger. And here's the the like.
• 20:34
  This is when it kind of feels a bit too bloody dark at some
• 20:38
  points, you know? They can't.
• 20:41
  Play uniform pants. They're windy when it's too
• 20:44
  bright. They're windy when it's too
• 20:45
  dark. Oh, you know, I'm just, oh,
• 20:47
  you're over there. I'm absolutely fine.
• 20:51
  I'll tell you what. I'll tell you one thing that
• 20:52
  really shows the worth of the info text you get on the DVDs
• 20:54
  and the Blu-ray collections is that I caption again what part
• 20:57
  of this scene saying oh it didn't let it set?
• 20:59
  Such as the hold would have been intemperated as a transmission
• 21:03
  fault 10 years prior to this, which would have automatically
• 21:05
  triggered the test card screen. Wow.
• 21:10
  But technology advanced so much by that point that that wasn't
• 21:12
  going to be a possibility. But can you just imagine noughts
• 21:15
  and crosses with the clown flashing up halfway through this
• 21:17
  story? Oh, I used.
• 21:19
  To love that car, didn't you? Is that the little girl with the
• 21:21
  clown? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 21:23
  Yes, all that, yeah. And this.
• 21:24
  Bit this bit is like some surreal that guy at the window
• 21:29
  with the TARDIS, just like, you know, squirming his face up
• 21:33
  against the glass. It's just like part of, you
• 21:36
  know, this, this is what I mean about this being some kind of
• 21:38
  weird fever dream. I mean this.
• 21:40
  What's this? This still?
• 21:43
  Do you remember the kid after the distance?
• 21:46
  She's always involved in this sort of weird shit that goes
• 21:48
  down. I'm wondering if she was taking
• 21:50
  drugs, you know, for hours time. This bizarre stuff seems to
• 21:54
  happen to her, doesn't it? I mean, the next week she's
• 21:58
  going to sink the Mirka, for God's sakes.
• 21:59
  What did I smoke last night? You.
• 22:01
  Leave my boy in the Mirka, won't you?
• 22:03
  I wouldn't have this. Why are you so in love with the
• 22:08
  Mirka? May ask.
• 22:09
  Who would it be? Come on, it's the most useless
• 22:14
  monster ever. Why you don't love it?
• 22:17
  Well, now you make a good. There's a there's a small part
• 22:20
  of me that like would really like the Mirka to be running the
• 22:23
  Grand National. My school races, yeah.
• 22:28
  No, wait, if this is this alright, sorry, Enlightenment
• 22:32
  fans, we're going to Warriors Deep for the second The Phantom
• 22:35
  Menace pod race. Yeah, and all of them going
• 22:38
  round, and then the Merca starts striding through.
• 22:40
  Woo beats everybody. Imagine that.
• 22:43
  CGI Merca though, of course, but in the same design.
• 22:47
  Get to work on that, George Lucas.
• 22:48
  Yeah, you could. Which one?
• 22:50
  You could have any doctor riding him.
• 22:51
  Which one would you have I? Beg your pardon?
• 22:55
  On the top with the range, you know what I mean?
• 22:56
  Oh. God, she would have just Capaldi
• 22:59
  playing his electric guitar. At all, it'd be happened the
• 23:02
  best time, wouldn't they? Yeah, yeah.
• 23:03
  It's just like, you know? What did he say in last
• 23:07
  Christmas when he was on the sleigh?
• 23:15
  This is why I should be left alone all day.
• 23:17
  I'm so desperate to talk to people tonight.
• 23:20
  What I like about this as well is the fact that the Doctor's
• 23:23
  first reaction is to like, completely like try and be part
• 23:27
  of the crew and blend in rather than just kind of run around the
• 23:30
  place. Go.
• 23:30
  I'm the Doctor, you know he's in.
• 23:33
  Edwardian gear as well, isn't he?
• 23:34
  So he's in the right period gear for once.
• 23:37
  Yeah, and it's just like he's, I don't know quite how standing
• 23:41
  around reading a newspaper kind of like blends him in with the
• 23:43
  rest of the crew. But anyway, never mind.
• 23:47
  I there's, there's a wonderful bit seen in the minute with the
• 23:51
  crew, which has just got some really peppy dialogue.
• 23:55
  It's it's funny dialogue. It's in for it's a, it's a great
• 23:58
  way of doing exposition because I didn't, I lots of information
• 24:02
  was coming at me, but I didn't realise because it was, it was
• 24:05
  really fun interactions. Yeah.
• 24:07
  Well, then we cut back. We do cut back to taken a lot in
• 24:10
  this dark room, don't we? You're sort of wandering around.
• 24:12
  We do. That kind of goes back to what
• 24:14
  you were saying earlier on. I mean, this is a great story of
• 24:16
  the companions because they get so much to do.
• 24:20
  Well, yeah. You wait till we talk about this
• 24:22
  weird unrequited romance that goes on in this story.
• 24:26
  And we've got, we've got rid of Nyssa as well.
• 24:28
  So, you know, I mean, she'd just be having a headache on the
• 24:30
  TARDIS if she'd still run for this.
• 24:32
  I. Beg your pardon?
• 24:32
  Got rid of her. Nyssa was my favorite.
• 24:35
  Hell, you know. Oh.
• 24:37
  Dear, I better stop one of my notes for later then I don't
• 24:40
  want to upset. Quickly, quickly.
• 24:45
  I'm aware she's as popular as pubic lice, but I you know, I do
• 24:49
  like her. No, please say it.
• 24:51
  Please just for the. Reference.
• 24:53
  I'll keep that. I'll keep that.
• 24:55
  So this is Pat Butcher's husband then, from EastEnders.
• 24:59
  Oh, do you know what? You've just, I was just about to
• 25:01
  introduce the high stakes game of the commentary, but you've
• 25:04
  kind of OK, I was going to say there's 22 actors that have been
• 25:10
  in EastEnders in this episode of Doctor Who.
• 25:12
  Joe's correctly identified one, but there is another.
• 25:15
  So see if you can spot guys. Well, I have to have one that
• 25:17
  leads Camerons to the other one. Yeah, let's see if Cam gets it.
• 25:22
  I've only watched like 2 episodes of EastEnders in my
• 25:24
  entire life so I don't think we're going to get there.
• 25:27
  That's a 2 and 8000 chance then. Is it that really sexy Asian guy
• 25:31
  against the bunk there? Nope.
• 25:32
  Oh shame, he deserves more work. Oh my God.
• 25:36
  It's not Mark Strickson, is it? It's not someone obvious like
• 25:38
  that. Do you know what?
• 25:39
  I'd convinced myself that he had been in a bit.
• 25:41
  It's not. He was his.
• 25:42
  Angel, he wasn't he. That's right.
• 25:44
  Yeah, Hospital. Drama.
• 25:45
  Yeah, but there is someone else in there in this story, so.
• 25:49
  We obviously we just had. Scotland, So the Bianca Jackson
• 25:52
  Clarkson. What's his name?
• 25:53
  Michael Cashman, who was in time flight, Wasn't he?
• 25:56
  He? Was yeah.
• 25:56
  And he was Colin, wasn't he? Yeah, in EastEnders.
• 25:59
  Yeah. Oh, he set some waves going,
• 26:00
  didn't he? Yeah.
• 26:03
  Oh, are you not going to tell us then?
• 26:04
  Oh, you're going to wait till the end of the episode?
• 26:06
  You have to spot who it is, see if you can correctly identify
• 26:08
  us. OK, we've sounded in the
• 26:09
  EastEnders clack some of the time is.
• 26:11
  It somebody in that set though in that in that group, no.
• 26:14
  Elsewhere. OK.
• 26:18
  Actually, whatever. You like funny someone, I might
• 26:20
  know who it is. I think I might know, it is now
• 26:22
  as I go on. Camera.
• 26:22
  I'll save it for when he's. I'll save it for when he's.
• 26:25
  They're on the on the screen. In a minute.
• 26:28
  Right. This is what I thought we made
• 26:29
  about this peppy dialogue. He goes, oh, you know, there's
• 26:32
  nothing like a bit of heart attack, nothing like a bit of
• 26:34
  grog. And then he goes, whoa, there's
• 26:36
  nothing like a curvy woman. And I'm like, this is most
• 26:39
  unusual dialogue for Doctor Who classic series.
• 26:42
  And then I realised this is written by a woman.
• 26:45
  Yeah, she knows exactly how men talk, unlike the men writers.
• 26:49
  Yeah, and she's the first woman to write for the series Isabel,
• 26:51
  which is staggering considering they're 20 years in.
• 26:54
  The the astonishing thing is that this is a female writer and
• 26:59
  director, because that wouldn't happen again in the classic
• 27:02
  series and it wouldn't happen again until Rosa, which is way,
• 27:07
  you know, in the new series. Really, that's the next time you
• 27:10
  get a female. Wow.
• 27:11
  Oh. No, no, that's survival.
• 27:13
  Isn't that Rona Monroe? Yeah, but Alan Weary directs
• 27:17
  that one. A combination audio, yeah, yeah.
• 27:21
  Yeah, but the. Two big creatives of being
• 27:24
  women. If you know, yeah.
• 27:26
  So, you know, and you think with a new series, which we think
• 27:28
  from the off was progressive and it took some time, we had a
• 27:37
  conversation like this once. Do you remember when you guys
• 27:39
  couldn't remember anything after that drink I gave you?
• 27:43
  Oh, when we were out for a drink with you and John Leslie.
• 27:45
  Yeah, yeah. Please don't suggest we're
• 27:49
  mates. Please.
• 27:52
  Now, look, I'm telling you now, these scenes in the shorter
• 27:55
  version, Yeah. Of her.
• 27:56
  You didn't keep coming back here.
• 27:58
  It was 2 twice you came back here and then she was out of
• 28:01
  this hold. This is going on far too long
• 28:03
  and. It's gone on a while like, but
• 28:06
  it's just like, look at these guys just walking around just
• 28:08
  like, hello, fascinating. Yes, with me young need your
• 28:14
  mind your boob tube. It is.
• 28:17
  I've just noticed how pinned down she is, bless her.
• 28:22
  Yeah, oof. Yeah, that's not a brief other
• 28:25
  question. Like not to get you both
• 28:27
  cancelled, but like when Teigen, when when Perry came along, he
• 28:31
  went in totally the other direction JNT didn't he?
• 28:33
  He was plumping them up every week.
• 28:35
  Yeah, again, but hadn't noticed. No other notice.
• 28:41
  As Donna said to Rose in the episode, Turn left, you liar.
• 28:49
  You know, as he's never noticed Nicola Bryant's cleavage.
• 28:54
  Never. It's all about it.
• 28:56
  It is a handsome production. This whole thing though, I think
• 28:59
  the the sets. I'm sorry, you were talking a
• 29:02
  bit of cleavage. It is a stylish production.
• 29:06
  There we go. I think.
• 29:08
  I think there's some money here and I think there's some stories
• 29:11
  in this season. Terminus, Jesus Christ, Arc of
• 29:15
  Infinity, which is just all poo brown.
• 29:17
  It's so ugly. Arc of Infinity in comparison.
• 29:21
  This just feels like it has got a bit of dollar in it.
• 29:24
  There's a lot of wood. They've spent a lot of money on
• 29:26
  a lot of wood. Yeah, most of most of this
• 29:29
  Formica, you know, stuff you get in the top of your kitchen
• 29:31
  worktops. Like how?
• 29:32
  Do you know that? Info text my man.
• 29:35
  Info text you got. Thank you.
• 29:38
  Research myself. You've got loads of notes from
• 29:41
  info text. I love you.
• 29:43
  I love you so much. Nobody prepares as much as you
• 29:47
  either. You should be employed to be on
• 29:49
  these commentaries, you know. Would you like a salary?
• 29:52
  I'll. I'll, I'll take a job, yeah.
• 29:53
  Oh great, OK, I could offer you a cup of tea and a packet of
• 29:56
  mini Cheddar's per episode. That's all I need.
• 29:59
  That's all the payment I've taken abroad.
• 30:01
  I've just been thinking there's in this scene with the crew,
• 30:04
  there's there's a lot of men in a very tight space and I don't
• 30:07
  know if either of you agree with that.
• 30:09
  Yeah, where'd you sign up to be a sailor?
• 30:15
  Well, Joe? You know what they say, calm in
• 30:19
  the Navy. Any of you boys been to sea at
• 30:25
  all? That is not have you?
• 30:30
  Have you cruised? Oh.
• 30:31
  For fuck. Bloody hell.
• 30:35
  Haven't been arrested for it anyway.
• 30:39
  Have you holidayed on the high seas?
• 30:41
  Have. I.
• 30:43
  No. I've been on a ferry.
• 30:46
  I've been in a ferry, but I've never been.
• 30:49
  On a ferry not quite as high. Sad as I've been to Amsterdam,
• 30:57
  really. Yeah, people be quite a Greek
• 31:00
  rescue can't be adopted and they couldn't fly them directly into
• 31:03
  the UK, so we had to get a fairly from Newcastle to
• 31:06
  Amsterdam to pick them up like some sort of drug deal in the
• 31:09
  airport. It's.
• 31:10
  Like, do you know what given I thought that was going to be a
• 31:12
  really, really sort of horrible story about drugs and sex.
• 31:16
  That was so cute, that story. You picked up a rich animal.
• 31:20
  Yeah, yeah, you've been got. Rescued by, but on holiday in
• 31:24
  Greece. Found them halfway up sort of
• 31:26
  hillside, many months in the old ruins.
• 31:29
  So it was a cat charity on the island.
• 31:30
  So we got them to rescue them and we adopted them, brought
• 31:33
  them home. And how can people do anything
• 31:36
  but love you, Lee? I mean, honestly in life, hey.
• 31:40
  He's kicking around something, actually.
• 31:41
  He might make an appearance later.
• 31:43
  I'm asking a genuine question now.
• 31:44
  I assume everybody in your life adores you, yes?
• 31:47
  Well, you know, I should certainly unfavourable reviews,
• 31:51
  you know, Yeah. What are you getting
• 31:53
  unfavourable? You send them my way.
• 31:54
  I'll send them, I'll send them to Europe and.
• 31:56
  Daniel Robinsley. Well, both have them.
• 32:01
  I'm sorry. Back to the story.
• 32:02
  Now, what is going on? OK, so we're in the the
• 32:10
  captain's table now, aren't we? We're about to have supper.
• 32:12
  We are Captain Birds Eye, Yeah. We're going to be introduced by
• 32:16
  Northerner Keith Barron, who for some reason has dropped his
• 32:19
  northern accent. There he is.
• 32:22
  It is there. He is.
• 32:23
  Look at that. He does play this part very well
• 32:28
  though. He's got that really sort of
• 32:29
  detached kind of olive old in this team.
• 32:33
  He's so still, isn't he? I know like this.
• 32:36
  And even when he gets angry, his body language is completely
• 32:40
  fixed. Even when he's cross.
• 32:43
  Oh, look at Tolo in the hat. Do you know he looks a bit like
• 32:45
  my mark? I might get my hat like that,
• 32:50
  You know, he's got a school uniform.
• 32:51
  I was just going to. Say.
• 32:53
  He. Does cosplay Turlo every now and
• 32:55
  again? I mean, we've got Hoover Club
• 32:57
  coming up in a few weeks, Joe Oh.
• 32:59
  No, it's for the bedroom. It's just for the bedroom,
• 33:01
  right? Well, there we go.
• 33:06
  It's all right, Cam. He's 38.
• 33:09
  He's of age, all right. Oh.
• 33:11
  Well, yeah, that's fine. It's all right.
• 33:13
  Whatever. The drinks gone.
• 33:15
  The drinks gone. Their drinks are we?
• 33:17
  See that even that is an unusual, like amount of detail
• 33:21
  in a set. I think that they've done the
• 33:22
  dinner, you know what I mean? Everyone's in lovely costumes.
• 33:25
  They dress the set beautifully. I don't know, I just think go
• 33:29
  and watch Terminus, all right, and see the sets in Terminus.
• 33:32
  There's no detail in them at all.
• 33:34
  I think it's safe to see it as a classy production.
• 33:36
  This. Thank you for summing that up.
• 33:39
  Otherwise I would just keep pointing out things you know.
• 33:43
  Feel free to just just. I actually think the best scenes
• 33:47
  in the whole story when they go up on deck, I think they're
• 33:50
  beautifully directed. The lighting out there.
• 33:55
  It's the unfortunate thing in the other version, you know the
• 33:58
  the 75 minute version is they'd obviously they brought a new
• 34:00
  seizure which has already dated quite terribly.
• 34:03
  Not as bad as Babylon 5, but pretty bad.
• 34:06
  And they've tried to do Tegan and Mariner on the deck as
• 34:10
  people, but they just look like little stencil outlines because
• 34:13
  they can't do the detail in them at the moment.
• 34:16
  Yeah. I suppose there's the temptation
• 34:18
  to add things if you're doing it's like a revised CGI for
• 34:21
  stuff, but yeah, it should normally just complement what's
• 34:24
  there already. Is that a light hanging or a
• 34:27
  boom mic? I think that's a boom.
• 34:29
  Mic, that's a light. No, it's a light.
• 34:30
  You sure? It was in the last scene it was.
• 34:33
  Oh, OK, fair enough. It was a light look, definitely
• 34:37
  a light. We've got to find something to
• 34:38
  say CAB, all right. So it's a boom mic.
• 34:42
  I think you'll find it was a boob mic in scene 13.
• 34:45
  Here we are. But this, this whole idea of the
• 34:50
  entire crew being stolen and brought here to this sort of
• 34:53
  never space where they play this game, it's very sort of the war
• 34:57
  games, isn't it? Capturing loads of different
• 34:59
  people. Yeah, different time.
• 35:01
  Different parts of space and then bringing them together and
• 35:05
  putting them against each other. Oh, they made that connection.
• 35:07
  Yeah, you're right. Exactly.
• 35:08
  Yeah, it's a really cool idea though as well.
• 35:11
  You bring back all these, you know, famous like kind of
• 35:15
  different races of sea fearing people.
• 35:20
  They're all kind of competing against one another for this
• 35:22
  this prize. It's it's a enlightenment sort
• 35:26
  of base idea is absolutely sound.
• 35:28
  Yeah, and people that say that Eric, oh, someone say his
• 35:34
  surname for me because I'm always told off.
• 35:36
  How do you say his surname? The script editor, Eric.
• 35:38
  Siebert I think. Thank you.
• 35:40
  I mean, you say it in a sexier way as well, Eric, what you just
• 35:43
  said. They say that he couldn't find
• 35:46
  new writers. They say that there were no
• 35:49
  original ideas in his time. You know, they said there was no
• 35:52
  innovation in this time. But I just think watch this
• 35:54
  story. It's nonsense.
• 35:56
  Maybe not as much as some other eras, but he found good riots.
• 35:59
  He found Barbara Clegg, He found Peter Grimway, whether you like
• 36:03
  him or not, Philip Martin, Eric Pringle.
• 36:07
  He got some great stuff out of Robert Holmes.
• 36:09
  Like he did fine riots. I feel like I'm arguing now on
• 36:15
  the Polish box against nobody. He did.
• 36:20
  Find it. It's weirdly refreshing to not
• 36:22
  have to cope with a point against that, you know?
• 36:25
  He was trying all right. I.
• 36:31
  Spent a year hating on Doctor Who on this box I need to carry.
• 36:35
  On Are You? Are you on My side again for
• 36:37
  Warren Sontarans? I am defending, so yeah.
• 36:45
  I think you both are, yeah. So yeah, fucking.
• 36:48
  Annihilate Michael Mills just you way the man who dislikes
• 36:53
  fun. Oh my God, what's going on?
• 36:55
  Spaceship A. Spaceship.
• 36:57
  Yeah, a lot. That's brilliant.
• 36:59
  What an ending. As cliffhanger is going, I know
• 37:01
  it's not high stakes screaming in your face, but that is a
• 37:04
  proper cliffhanger. It's a proper like reveal of the
• 37:08
  next part of the story. It's intriguing enough to lead
• 37:10
  you into the second part, isn't it?
• 37:12
  And you know, it's obviously we haven't established it's a race
• 37:15
  yet entirely, but you now know you're in space, you're not on
• 37:20
  the high seas. And they are, you know, this
• 37:24
  historical setting isn't quite what it seems.
• 37:27
  I think it's a really nice little sort of like twist.
• 37:30
  But back in the day, I think moments of false jeopardy, if
• 37:35
  they were done really well, were my favorite types of
• 37:37
  cliffhanger. I've sort of grown out of them
• 37:40
  now because you're sort of, you know, those they're going to
• 37:42
  survive. They're the regulars.
• 37:43
  But how many times can you threaten to decapitate Peter
• 37:46
  Davidson, you know, before we we're gone Now?
• 37:49
  I think what you said there, the the stories that hinge the plot
• 37:53
  in another direction or, or just completely change the direction
• 37:57
  of where the story's been, that's AI think that's a
• 38:00
  brilliant cliffhanger. Yeah, and visually as well, like
• 38:04
  Edwardian sailing ships in space.
• 38:07
  It's all but it's got enough of a hook to bring you back for the
• 38:09
  next episode, doesn't it? Yeah, I just well.
• 38:13
  I mean, are you hooked enough to go into the next episode?
• 38:15
  I. Think Mcgillan.
• 38:16
  Yeah. Absolutely I'll.
• 38:19
  Cut it right there.