Latest / You Minding Your Own Business / Episode 29 - You Minding Your Own Business: Walking With Your Own Drum.

Transcript

Episode 29 - You Minding Your Own Business: Walking With Your Own Drum. · You Minding Your Own Business

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Hey y'all. Hello, Hello, how y'all doing.
• 0:04
  Speaker 2: Welcome to my channel, your hosts Goddess Asha Mariama. Thank
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: you for joining me for my podcast you Minding your
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: Own Business. If you guys want to hear this podcast
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: on spriaker dot com, y'all basically can just come check
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: it out. You wanna basically become a member. Tell me
• 0:22
  Speaker 2: if you like or don't like the podcast, you can
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: just hit me up there. You can also go to
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: sprinker dot com Forge last My name A s H
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: A m A R I A M A and you
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: will see all of my podcasts. You can also go
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: to iHeartRadio, Spotify, Google, Amazon, and multiple other podcasts streaming
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: companies and platforms and you'll see my podcasts there. A
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: little about me, I am a certified recovery, healing and
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: recovery coach. I'm also a mental health practitioner as well,
• 0:57
  Speaker 2: and I'm all about helping people on their paths and
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: their journeys to a new and better you through self discovering.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: So I'm one of these people about helping people to
• 1:08
  Speaker 2: mind their own business and focus on themselves and focus
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: on what you have going on versus you worrying about
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: somebody else and what they have going on. I think
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: people need to stop trying to be like everybody else
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: and start being who they are and start doing their
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: own thing, because at the end of the day, it's
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: not about what everybody else got going on.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: It's about you.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: You not worrying about the people that's trying to expose
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: you or trying to make you feel less than what
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: you are, because the only thing those people are doing
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: is moving things out the way that don't belong, that
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: shouldn't be there.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: That's pretty much about it.
• 1:47
  Speaker 2: So I wouldn't be too worried about negative people at
• 1:51
  Speaker 2: this point. And today that's what we're going to talk about.
• 1:54
  Speaker 2: I did a podcast last night on my YouTube, and
• 1:58
  Speaker 2: I tried to do it on my TikTok chain, but
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: something happened where somebody pretty much what they did was
• 2:06
  Speaker 2: somebody flagged it because we were talking about God, apparently,
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: and I don't understand why somebody want to flag a
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: life about God. I mean, I'm just confused about that
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: because we were talking about does God put you through
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: anything that you can't handle? And I pretty much said no,
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: because God doesn't put you any through anything.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: It's the people you choose to be around based upon.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: Your choice, decisions, actions, and behavior determines what you go
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: through and who's there with you, you know, during the journey.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: But it's just I find it kind of, you.
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: Know, hilarious when stuff like that happens, and it just
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: tells me where the world is now. And it was
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: funny when they did that because I'm just sitting there,
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: like tripping because I'm sitting there, like, why would TikTok
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: flag my video talking about God?
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: But I don't think it was TikTok.
• 3:06
  Speaker 2: I think it was somebody just being spiteful and being
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: mean and mad because I'm sitting here talking about God.
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: And I guess they said, you know what, this is
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: a little too deep. I don't think this is a
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: good idea. So yeah, I find it kind of hilariously funny.
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: But anyway, today's topic for today is going to be
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: about the fact of the choices, decisions, actions and behavior
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: that you do that cause a bunch of trauma and
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: karma and all of these different things that interfere in
• 3:45
  Speaker 2: your life. Now, I also do the Contruwayne skits and
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: I do videos about those as well, and I've been
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: posting them on my YouTube channel and also posting them
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: on my Facebook channel.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: These country waynes gets have helped me as.
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: Far as a life coach because it's my way of
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: breaking them down from that perspective, and I'm glad that
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: I'm honestly doing it. And I've thought about doing them
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: on here on this platform, but I'm not sure yet.
• 4:14
  Speaker 2: But the one thing that one of the characters I
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: look at that's gonna help me with this topic is Amber.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: Amber and Sonny.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: Now, Amber and Sonny to me are the exact same
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: you know a person, to be honest, I feel like
• 4:31
  Speaker 2: they're the exact same when it comes to behavior, When
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: it comes to their action, choices and decisions, they're their
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: own worst disaster. And there are a lot of people
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: that lose out on good things because of the facts
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: of them allowing other people to come on they journey
• 4:52
  Speaker 2: that don't belong like Amber lost her husband to Sheila
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: because Sheilah was her best friend and her hu. Her
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: best friend ended up not only messing with her husband,
• 5:03
  Speaker 2: but also getting pregnant by him, which makes it even
• 5:06
  Speaker 2: worse now, mind you, at the end of.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: The day, her.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: Mama, Brenda and all of them told her about bringing
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: all these people into her world, which is something that
• 5:20
  Speaker 2: she chose to do. At the end of the day,
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: this is what she chose. So I just want people
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: to understand.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: That I get it, and that I.
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: Pretty much understand that when it comes to these situations,
• 5:36
  Speaker 2: we all have our battles that we have to you know,
• 5:41
  Speaker 2: deal with and that we have to focus on. And
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: I want people to also understand that, you know, sometimes
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: you got to move in silence and not let nobody
• 5:54
  Speaker 2: know how you move and what direction that you go in.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: And it's too many people that talk too much. It's
• 5:59
  Speaker 1: too many people.
• 6:00
  Speaker 2: People that got to tell people when they got a
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: new job, They gotta tell people when they get their money,
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: they gotta tell people when they get all of these things.
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: And I just feel like that I don't think that's
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: a good idea because once you start telling people certain things,
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: then what tends to happen is you'll have a situation
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: where you'll have people that are gonna try to come
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: in between your situation and they're gonna try to, you know,
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: do things and try to you know, make you feel,
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: you know, what I'm saying less than what you are.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: So what I will say in this situation is you're
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: gonna have if you say something to anybody that's a
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: hater or anybody that's going to basically essentially make you
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: feel less than what you are. Just just know this.
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: The situation can be where you're gonna end up getting
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: yourself talked out of an opportunity. And a lot of
• 7:05
  Speaker 2: people get talked out of opportunities all the time.
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: A lot of.
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: People get lured from their paths because of the fact
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: of number one, trying to follow somebody's path, listening to
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: other people and letting other people put you on a
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: different direction.
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: And I just feel like that.
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: This is something that you know, people need to understand that.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: I get it.
• 7:39
  Speaker 2: I do you know you want people to you know,
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: how can I put this? I'm trying to think of
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: the words. What I will say is you're gonna have
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: people that's going to try to stand in the way
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: of your greatness. I'll say it that way. You have
• 7:58
  Speaker 2: a lot of people that when they were a kid,
• 8:00
  Speaker 2: they wanted to be a lawyer, they wanted to be
• 8:02
  Speaker 2: a doctor, they wanted to be all these things, and
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: their parents talked them out of it, or because of
• 8:09
  Speaker 2: the friends you hung around with, because of the relationships
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: that you were in as a teenager, You're now pregnant,
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: you hooked on drugs, alcohol, Things happen. So I tell
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: people that when it comes to this situation, that when
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: we start doubting ourselves and having these insecurities, that's because
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: of what either society has put in your head or
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: because what the people that are around you or you
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: don't know are putting are making you feel. So the
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: one thing about self esteem and self worth and self
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: value is that basically, essentially it goes from what you
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: feel about yourself. At least it's what you should, but
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: that's not what you're basing yourself on. You're basing yourself
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: based upon what other people think. And that's the sad
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: part about it. So I get the fact that when
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: it comes down to these situations, when you look back
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: during your recovery, you're gonna be asking yourself, well, why
• 9:19
  Speaker 2: is it that I allowed myself to not achieve my goals?
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: Why didn't I stay on the path or becoming a doctor?
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: Why did I get pregnant?
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: Could have should have wood us?
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: The could have should have wood us that you didn't
• 9:34
  Speaker 2: do and the fact that you didn't do it makes
• 9:38
  Speaker 2: it even worse. And not saying that you don't have
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: time to do it, because you do. But the problem
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: is is that you didn't. You didn't do it, That's
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: the problem. It had been one thing if you would
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: have done it, that I'd have been like, Okay, then
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: this is something that you should have done.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: But being that you didn't, then you have to take
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: everything that comes with the fact that you didn't. A
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: lot of people are still stuck.
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: In trying to make something happen that basically, you know
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: what I'm saying should have happened alone time ago, and
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: it didn't happen. So, like I said, I get the
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: fact of what a lot of people are saying, but
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: at the same time, I just feel like that people
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: need to understand that if you don't try, you don't
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: know what's gonna happen. A lot of people walked away
• 10:41
  Speaker 2: from a lot of things because they're doing jobs based
• 10:45
  Speaker 2: upon obligation and not because of the love of it.
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: A lot of people are doing jobs because they pay more,
• 10:51
  Speaker 2: but they're not passionate about what it is that they're doing.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: So a lot of people are not meant to work.
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: For anybody went to work for themselves or they're not
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: meant to work at all. So don't get me wrong,
• 11:06
  Speaker 2: I get it. Absolutely be on the shadow of that,
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: I'll get it. But at the same time, you know,
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: I just want people to understand that your dreams and
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: your goals are important, and being able to have the
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: freedom to do the things that you want to do
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: are important.
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: But we don't talk about that. We don't talk about how.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: Important it is that people live their dreams and do
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: what makes them happy and doing what brings them joy.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: But here's the kickers of it all. You gotta do
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: it on your own.
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: The problem is everybody's so worried about everybody else and
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: what they're gonna think about if they choose to do this.
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: They gotta worry about what their parents are gonna think.
• 11:48
  Speaker 2: They gotta worry about what other people think. Because let's
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: just say, for arguments, say that your parents are the
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: ones that are paying for it.
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: That's a whole another conversation.
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: Now, if your parents are paying for it, yeah, you
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: may have to do what they want you to do.
• 12:06
  Speaker 2: But at the same time, I want people to understand
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: that you know, in these situations.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: That you know it's okay to.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Basically essentially say that you're gonna have to find a
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: way of your own. So even though you might say, okay,
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: I want to basically be an actor or be an actress,
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: not saying you shouldn't be realistic, not saying that you
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: shouldn't do it, But what I am saying is that
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: you should definitely make sure you have a backup plan,
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: make sure that why you're trying to fulfill your dream,
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: that you are taken care of, and that you're gonna
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: be okay, because some people are gonna make it, some
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: people ain't. Now it may also come down that you
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: have to do something for yourself, meaning you building something
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: that is of yourself that everybody else can be involved in.
• 13:09
  Speaker 2: So what I will say in these situations is, you know,
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: these journeys are not easy at all, but you just
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: got to be able to say to yourself, you know what,
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: I got this, I did this, And a lot of
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: people that's what they've done. They have when and they
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: now are fulfilling their goals.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: They're now feeling their dreams.
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: You have people in their fifties and sixties, when they
• 13:39
  Speaker 2: were younger, did not do the things that they want
• 13:42
  Speaker 2: to do, and now they're traveling the world, they're living
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: their best life, and they're happy.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: And that's what's important.
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: So there are some people that are out here doing
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: their own thing and they're just enjoying life and being
• 13:58
  Speaker 2: at peace with that. So I just want people to
• 14:03
  Speaker 2: understand that when it comes to these situation, you know, I.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: Just get it.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: But when you don't do these things, and you don't
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: do the things you're passionate about, you're gonna be miserable.
• 14:18
  Speaker 2: Like a lot of people are pushing marriage so bad.
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: They're pushing relationships so bad on these young people. But
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: if you haven't even found themselves yet, they're not even
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: at a place where they should be married at a
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: young age. I feel like people shouldn't get married to
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: their thirty I don't think they should have their first
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: child to they about thirty seven. I just think people
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: need to wait. I think people need to enjoy life.
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: That's what they need to do.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: So that's why I say there's nothing wrong with you saying,
• 14:48
  Speaker 2: you know what, I'm not gonna rush to have kids.
• 14:51
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna rush to be in these relationships. I'm'a
• 14:53
  Speaker 2: travel the world. I'm gonna see what else is out
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: there and then go from there, and there's nothing in that,
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: And like I said, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it.
• 15:03
  Speaker 2: If you feel like that you need to go out
• 15:07
  Speaker 2: here and do your.
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Thing, then I say, you know what, go ahead. If
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: you feel like that.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: You don't want to have any kids because.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: You feel like that you're going to.
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: Be spoiled and titled and it's still about you and
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: that's the era that you're in, then by all means
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: you should do that. Nobody should be standing in a
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: way of you doing what you want to do.
• 15:34
  Speaker 1: And I'm all for that.
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: So I'm not mad at anybody that basically essentially is saying,
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: well until I get myself in a certain position, then
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: I'll say, okay, well maybe I'll consider having babies and
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: I'll consider having children. So I'm not mad at nobody
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: that has made that executive decision, because I think that's
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: important that people may make those decisions and they do
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: what makes them happy and what brings them joy.
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: So I just say to people, do what you feel
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: is going to make you, you know, the best that you can.
• 16:14
  Speaker 2: So, like I said, a lot of people now are
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: sitting back and they're just like, you know, I deserve
• 16:22
  Speaker 2: to have some type of happiness.
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: I deserve to have some.
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: Type of joy, and you should. Now for some people
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: it might be different. Some people may try to be
• 16:36
  Speaker 2: a part of the world and they may say, you
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: know what, I no longer want to even try to
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: be in relationships, romantically or anything else.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: I just want to be by myself. I want to
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: be alone.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: I want to basically do what I have to do,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: and I'm not worried about it. And they work hard,
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: they're dedicated in what they've done, and they're just doing
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: what makes them happy, and that's just it, you know,
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: And there's nothing wrong with that at all. So I
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: just say to people, you know, there is gonna come
• 17:09
  Speaker 2: a time where you're gonna come to that realization when
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: you look at your situation and you're gonna be like,
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: you know what, maybe I should just, you know, not
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: go out here and do anything right now. Maybe I
• 17:25
  Speaker 2: should just go and just chill and not worry about it.
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: So again, there's nothing wrong with it. So if you
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: want to go out here, you want to travel the world.
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: And keep keep that going, that's what matters to you.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: So whatever matters to you, because eventually that's what it's
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: gonna come down to the only way that you're gonna
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: find out what's best for you and what works for
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: you is when you let go of what everybody else
• 17:57
  Speaker 2: got to say about it. You gotta let go with
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: what everybody else thinks and do in all honesty, what
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: you feel is gonna be best for you, doing what
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: makes you happy, what's going to bring you some type
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: of joy, because that's honestly what matters. What matters is
• 18:14
  Speaker 2: that you're doing the things that are going to bring
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: you peace, that's going to bring you happiness, and that's
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: just it.
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: On that. So even though you may say to yourself.
• 18:25
  Speaker 2: You know what, I'm not worried about being in some
• 18:29
  Speaker 2: romantic relationship. I'm okay with these individuals not wanting me.
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: I'm okay with that. I'm good with that. I can
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: basically get out here and handle my business accordingly. I'm
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: not gonna worry about what other people think. I'm not
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: gonna worry about people trying to tear me down. What
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: I am gonna focus on is doing what is best
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: for me, what makes me happy, traveling the world, seeing
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: what's out there, eating healthy, taking care of myself, taking
• 19:01
  Speaker 2: care of my internal health, you know, building a business,
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: building a brand, those type of things. So when you
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: have people that are like, you know what, I'm not
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: even gonna focus on this at this point. I'm just
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: gonna do what I have to do for me and
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: what works for me, and that's just it on that
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: and if people got a problem with it, then that's
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: on them. That has nothing to do with me. So
• 19:26
  Speaker 2: at the end of the day, once you get that mentality,
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: that's how you know you've healed because at this point
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: you just don't even care if this one and the
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: one thing that pisses negative people off more than anything
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: when you're not doing what they're doing, when people can't
• 19:43
  Speaker 2: be involved in what you got going on, or they
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: can't benefit from it. So when they can't benefit from
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: whatever it is that you're trying to do, that's when
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: they get mad. When they can't be a part of it,
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: or they can't impact you or affect you or manipulate
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: what bamboozle you or use you or lie to you, or.
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: Let's say, somebody cheas on you. You find out.
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: And instead of getting angry, you just start getting your
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: stuff together. And then one day they come home and
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: you ain't there and they don't know why you're not there.
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: They wonder where you've gone. You don't have any reaction
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: at all. You just pack your stuff and you leave.
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: You not even worry about them in any capacity, just like, look,
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: I'm just gonna pack my stuff and I'm just gonna go.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: And that's just it on that I'm not gonna sit.
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: Around and worry about this.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna let this affect me in any way
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: shape from a fashion.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: That's what that means.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: It just means that I'm not gonna sit up here
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: and worry about things that, in all honesty I cannot control.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: I'm only worried about what I have going on, what
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: I have to do, and that's it.
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna sit around and worry about the things
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: that I have no control o'em. So, for example, you
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: got people that's not even worried about people being there
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: for them, supporting them. They're they're not They have people
• 21:12
  Speaker 2: around them that are not their family members, it's not
• 21:15
  Speaker 2: their friends, not people that they thought were gonna be
• 21:20
  Speaker 2: there just regularly.
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: So you have people that's like, you know what.
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: I'm not even gonna worry about if this person don't
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: like me. So, for example, it's say you had a
• 21:32
  Speaker 2: crush on somebody and that person wasn't interested, and you're like,
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: you know what, I'm not even going to stress this.
• 21:42
  Speaker 2: I'm just going to say if that person says I'm
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: not interested, instead of you trying to pursue them, you
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: be like okay, and you leave it at that. For example,
• 21:53
  Speaker 2: if you're someone that don't wanna have sex and that's
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: not what you wanna do, and that's not how you
• 21:58
  Speaker 2: wanna go about things, and if a person don't respect that,
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: then that's not your person. If that person can't go
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: with you on that journey, that's not your person. So
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: pretty much, when you minding your own business, it's yeah,
• 22:14
  Speaker 2: you may want things personally, but I learned that if
• 22:18
  Speaker 2: you don't experience.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: It, you're not really gonna want it. So if you're
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: used to being without it, then you're not gonna be
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: mad when you don't have it.
• 22:27
  Speaker 2: Matter of fact, you're not even gonna be pissed off
• 22:29
  Speaker 2: about it. It's gonna be like, well, okay, it ain't
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: meant for me, and I'm gonna leave it at that.
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: And that's just how that that's how that's gonna go
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: so it's not like you're gonna sit up here and
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: be mad because this relationship isn't working out. You're just like, Okay,
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: it's just not working out, and that's just it on that.
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: So you're not gonna sit around and be upset because
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: these people that you know, you see other people in
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: these relationships. You don't care because you have no idea
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: what these people what what really it looks like behind
• 23:06
  Speaker 2: closed doors. So you're just like, you know what, I'm
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: not even gonna let this bother me. I'm just gonna
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: keep a pushing, keep doing what I need to do.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: And then that's it on that. I'm not even gonna
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: worry about all this other stuff because honestly, I don't care.
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: And that's just it on that. You just don't care.
• 23:22
  Speaker 2: So as long as you are doing what you need
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: to do for you and yours, that's all that matter.
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: So w while you're sitting up here, traveling in the
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: world and enjoying yourself, your friends are in these relationships.
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: Then you look back twenty years later and now you're
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: finally getting married and you're finally about to have everything
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: you want. You have a good job, you're very successful.
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: Now you own your own business. Now you about to
• 23:50
  Speaker 2: get married, Now you about to start a family.
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: And then you look at your.
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: Same friends that got married in your twenties and now
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: or their twenties, i should say, and now they're single.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: So while you're married and you're in a stable relationship,
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: these same friends are not in the same situation. They're
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: now by themselves, raising kids by themselves. The same ones
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: that got married in their twenties, the same ones that
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: didn't really enjoy their lives. It was about them you
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: taking care of somebody else while you have let go
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: of your family. And while you have moved forward, these
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: other people are now having.
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: To raise kids now in they twenties. Can't go to
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: bike weed, can't do that.
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Grandma ain't watching them, best of the new greeneration of
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: Grandma's damn not watching these kids. So now you're stuck
• 24:47
  Speaker 2: with kids, and now you have to figure things out.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: So I'm just telling people when they come to these
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: situations that it's better to do things later on down
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: the line when they come to marriaging kids, then doing
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: it when you're younger. At twenty one, you should be
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: enjoying yourself. Twenty five, you should be enjoying yourself. The
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: only thing that should be keeping you from doing what
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: you want to do as a job or a business
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: that you're trying to build, and then once you build it,
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: then you're able to do what you want to. So
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: once you get that, you know, recurring money or residual income.
• 25:35
  Speaker 1: Then you can do what you want to. But are
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: you gonna work hard to build a business?
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: Yes, Are you gonna work hard to basically make money
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: to where you have the nice, finer things and your
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: health and wellness is intact, absolutely, absolutely. But at the
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: same time, I just want people to understand that the
• 25:57
  Speaker 2: only way you're gonna do that is if you stop
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: being jealous and envious of other people and what they got,
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: or stop worrying about the fact that you're not chosen
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: and you're not the person that they're choosing. It's okay
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: if they're not choosing you, It's okay if that person
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: don't love life, appreciate, value, wants you, needs you, validate you,
• 26:19
  Speaker 2: accept you, or approve of you.
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: It don't matter.
• 26:24
  Speaker 2: What matters is that you love yourself. What matters is
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: that you saving yourself for the right person. That you're
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: basically doing what's best for your health and wellness mentally
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: by not doing what everybody else is doing, going to
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: get plastic surgery. You embrace your flaws, your imperfections, and
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: your disability is a mistake you made in your past,
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: and don't worry about if somebody throwing in your face,
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: that's the one thing they're gonna do anyway, they're going
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: to do that. They're gonna throw it in your face,
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: and they're gonna try to make you feel bad.
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: But the point that I'm trying to.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: Make is it's okay, hey, to not be like these people.
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: All you need to do is just be happy. That's it.
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: All you got to do is be the best version
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: of yourself. And that's it.
• 27:16
  Speaker 2: All you gotta do is worry about you. And then
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: when you're ready to be in a relationship and you're
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: ready to build something, then by all means and build it.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: Build it, honey, build it. But it's okay if you do.
• 27:40
  Speaker 1: It's okay that you don't build it.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: It's okay that you're not married, so don't feel bad
• 27:45
  Speaker 2: because you're not married. I just hate when people feel
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: bad because they're not married and they got their mamas
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: and their their families, you know all you know upset
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: about the that you know, they got their families pressuring
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: them to get married, they got their friends pressuring them
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: to be in relationships. And some people will say, well,
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: this person ain't gonna won't me, honey. If you know
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: that person don't want you, then don't even pursue it.
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: If you know that that person is not going to
• 28:24
  Speaker 2: want anything to do with you, do not pursue it.
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: And it's okay if you're not the person chosen, because
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: in the end, like I said, if you somebody that
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: really feels good about yourself and you feel that you're
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: a prized then even if that person won't choose you,
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: guess what they don't mean you're not a prize.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Don't mean that.
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: You're that you're less than, because you're not less than.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: It just means you're not their person. And that's okay
• 28:52
  Speaker 2: if you're not their person either. It is quite all
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: right that you are not their person. It is quite
• 28:57
  Speaker 2: all right that you don't fit. If they not trying
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: to take the time to get to know you, it
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: is their loss. Stop thinking it is your loss because
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: they don't want You's their loss because they didn't take
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: the time to get to know you is their loss
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: because they decide to go with somebody because they look
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: good or because they got money. But in the end,
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: look at ten twenty years later that these people are
• 29:19
  Speaker 2: still singing. These people are still single, and they are
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: still out here. So like IM saying, it's it's really
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: okay in all honesty to not be chosen. So when
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: you mind your own business, that's exactly what that means.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: You not worried about whether you're chosen or not.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: You're not worried about whether this job is gonna hire
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: you or not, cause n why you.
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: At your job. Guess what you gonna be doing building
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: your business.
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: And when you build your business to where it needs
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: to be and you start becoming successful, that's when you
• 29:53
  Speaker 2: gonna be like, you know what, I can quit my job.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: When you make ten twenty thousand dollars a month, then
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: you can say, okay, I'll quit my job.
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: But but it has to be recurring income, not just
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: a couple months.
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: So again you don't have to do anything as far
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: as staying at jobs forever, cause nowadays people are not
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: gonna be a retired because the way these jobs don't pay,
• 30:17
  Speaker 2: the way these jobs are treating people.
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: That's why you have people that have small businesses. But unfortunately, in.
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: This society, you got people that's trying to stop that.
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: You got people that's trying to get people to go
• 30:28
  Speaker 2: back to work. So yeah, they trying to stop small
• 30:32
  Speaker 2: business owners trying to buy these business owners. I've been
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: saying that if your if your business is doing well,
• 30:38
  Speaker 2: you don't sell it.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: I don't. I don't recommend anybody sell their business.
• 30:42
  Speaker 2: I don't because by you selling your business, the only
• 30:45
  Speaker 2: thing that's gonna happen is you think that their money's
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: gonna last. But being that you've never had millions of
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: dollars before.
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: You ain't gonna do that. With blur blowing.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: Youin't gonna do nothing but splurge on it. You gonna
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: spend unnecessary money that you shouldn't even be spending. So,
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: like I said, I get it, I understand, I really
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: really do. But what I will say in these situations
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: is that you gotta do in the end what's best
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: for you. You gotta do what absolutely works for you.
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: And what I will absolutely say in these situations is
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: that the life that you have, you have chosen and
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: the decisions that you have made, should be made because
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: they're best for you. If you're someone that doesn't drink,
• 31:33
  Speaker 2: you don't need to drink. If you're someone that doesn't smoke,
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: you shouldn't be around people that's trying to convince you
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: to smoke. If that's not what you do and that's
• 31:42
  Speaker 2: not your character, then don't do something that isn't your character.
• 31:46
  Speaker 2: Don't do something that you don't normally do. So if
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: you don't normally drink like that and that's not what
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: you normally do, then I don't recommend that you do.
• 31:58
  Speaker 2: If you're someone that doesn't feel comfortable with having sex,
• 32:01
  Speaker 2: then don't have sex. Don't do what goes against your
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: standards and goes against your path.
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: Your journey and purpose to a new and better youth.
• 32:10
  Speaker 2: So when I say you focus on yourself, that's exactly
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: what I mean. You don't let nothing or nobody stand
• 32:16
  Speaker 2: in the way of your greatness.
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: You don't let nothing or nobody.
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: Standing a way of whatever it is that you are
• 32:23
  Speaker 2: trying to do. Because as long as you are doing
• 32:26
  Speaker 2: the things that fulfill you, that's all that matter. All
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: that matters that you're doing the things that's going to
• 32:33
  Speaker 2: bring you joy. That's gonna bring you happiness. You're doing
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: things that's gonna make you successful. Your health is gonna
• 32:40
  Speaker 2: be good, your wellness gonna be good because everything that
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: you're doing, every person that you're bringing in your situation
• 32:49
  Speaker 2: is going to serve a purpose. And if they don't,
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: you lead them exactly where they at. If they don't
• 32:55
  Speaker 2: serve a purpose in your life, if they're bringing misery
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: in your life and they're trying to lead you off,
• 32:59
  Speaker 2: you take advantage of your trying to do all these things,
• 33:01
  Speaker 2: then them ain't your person. That is not your person,
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: and it ain't so again, it is okay to say,
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: you know what, I'm going to go and I'm not
• 33:12
  Speaker 2: gonna worry about having kids. I'm not gonna feel bad
• 33:15
  Speaker 2: because I don't have kids. Because you shouldn't feel bad
• 33:19
  Speaker 2: because you don't have kids. It's okay that you don't.
• 33:22
  Speaker 2: And it's like people are pressuring these young kids to
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: have babies, and these young kids now are like, no, I'm.
• 33:29
  Speaker 1: Not having no baby. I ain't trying to be no
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: single mom like my mama was. I ain't trying to
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: work no regular nine to five job.
• 33:37
  Speaker 2: And you know what, again, I ain't mad at these
• 33:41
  Speaker 2: kids are like, look, I'm gonna make money on social media.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna build a business. I'm gonna build a brand.
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna go overseas. I'm gonna I'm gonna work overseas.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: People now are like, I wanna see what else is
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: out there. I don't want to just stay in my
• 33:57
  Speaker 1: environment where I'm miserable. Where I mean the same type
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: of people, the same type of character. I want something different.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: I deserve to have something more. I ain't mad at
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: nobody for that.
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: You do what you feel work for you, Okay, So
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: whatever works for you, whatever you need to do, that's
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: what you do. So again, don't sit up here and
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: feel bad because.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: You're on this. Well.
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: You know, I see all my friends and they going
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: to bite week. That don't mean you need to go.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 34:30
  Speaker 2: I see my friends and they all got a husband.
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: That don't mean it is meant for you to have
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: a husband. It's about being an individual, not being in groups.
• 34:38
  Speaker 2: It's not about being like everybody else, doing what everybody
• 34:40
  Speaker 2: else is doing, and acting like everybody else. It's about
• 34:44
  Speaker 2: you being you, finding your happiness and what brings you joy,
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: and that is what matters, and that's what recovery is.
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: Recovery is not about everybody else. It's about you.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: It's not about your family, it's not about your friends,
• 34:59
  Speaker 2: it's not about your your old jobs, current jobs. What
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: matters is what is now best for you? Because once
• 35:06
  Speaker 2: you heal, e n put this way, I said like this,
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: Once you recover and then you start healing, what are.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: You healing towards? What is the whole purpose of you healing?
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: Are you healing because you really wanna heal because that
• 35:22
  Speaker 2: is something you need to do? Are you healing because
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: you wanna live longer? Are you healing because you know what?
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: What is the new version of you gonna look like?
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: What is this new version of this heal person gonna
• 35:35
  Speaker 2: look like? Are they gonna be someone that's going to be,
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: you know, far as m successful, but you also gotta
• 35:46
  Speaker 2: break your habits too. What is this new version of
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: what you look like gonna consist of? Is it gonna
• 35:54
  Speaker 2: be that you're trying to be pretty for society to
• 35:56
  Speaker 2: get a man or are you trying to be pretty
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: for yourself? Are you trying to be successful because you
• 36:04
  Speaker 2: want to be able to do the things that you
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: wanna do but still do hard work at the same time.
• 36:08
  Speaker 1: So let me explain that.
• 36:09
  Speaker 2: Do you want to be successful to where you don't
• 36:12
  Speaker 2: work for nobody and you ain't got to worry about nobody,
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: You're just able to work for yourself and.
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: Do what you want too. I'm I mean, I'm just saying,
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: are you trying to do things to where you're able to?
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: You know?
• 36:30
  Speaker 2: L Let's say, for example, your mom and them been
• 36:32
  Speaker 2: helping you out for years, and you decide to pay
• 36:35
  Speaker 2: off your mama's and your dad's debt. So let me
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: give you a example of a don't when you start
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: making money, do not buy your mama a new house
• 36:44
  Speaker 2: that they cannot afford when you if something happened to you.
• 36:48
  Speaker 2: If you are up in age and you want to
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: buy your mom and them a house, even if you
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: pay it off, they still gotta pay taxes on it.
• 36:59
  Speaker 2: And if somebody else ain't gonna live in that house,
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: ain't no point of doing it now.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: If your mama and I already got a house and
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: you wanna remodel it and you wanna make it where
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: it looks nice, or let's say you buy some land
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: and you decide to build your mom and them.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: A house on that land. That's a whole nother you know, conversation.
• 37:25
  Speaker 2: Then that's something different if that's the case, But that's
• 37:30
  Speaker 2: because you're choosing to build something there so that way
• 37:36
  Speaker 2: they have somewhere to stay. If they come to stay,
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: that's a whole different thing. And then not only that,
• 37:40
  Speaker 2: whoever takes over that house that you bought, can they
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: afford it? A lot of you don't even think about that,
• 37:47
  Speaker 2: whether or not your friends and family can afford your lifestyle,
• 37:50
  Speaker 2: the lifestyle that was afforded to you. So again, I'm
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: not buying my sister in them, no expensive house. I'm
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: not buying them nothing they can't afford. And that's the thing.
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: Just because I can afford it, don't mean they can
• 38:01
  Speaker 2: afford it. Cause again, if something happened to me, guests who.
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: Got to take on all of it? It's certainly not
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: gonna be me. It's gonna be my child, or it's
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: gonna be my my parents, or if I was married,
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: my husband.
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: So I want people to understand that you that's your success,
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: that's your money, that's your house. But when you pass away,
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: can your family afford that they? Not the one playing
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: in the NBA in the NFL, how are they gonna
• 38:28
  Speaker 2: be an afforded house and for how long? So again, yeah,
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: they might get a check from you for you or
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: Social Security or whatever. Yeah they may get all of that,
• 38:42
  Speaker 2: but it does not mean in any capacity that they're
• 38:48
  Speaker 2: gonna be able to maintain it. It's just like the
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: you know, just like with the Michael Jackson ranch. I
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: don't even know if they sold it or not. I
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: don't know, but it's the same thing with that. I
• 39:03
  Speaker 2: get it, I understand. But at the same time, like
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: I said, if you can't afford it, then if your
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: parents can't afford it, and everybody around you can't avoid it,
• 39:12
  Speaker 2: then they don't need to be there. And like I said,
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: there's nothing. And that's why some people are now hanging
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: with people that have the same money they do. They're
• 39:22
  Speaker 2: not gonna be hanging around people that's broke. They ain't
• 39:25
  Speaker 2: gonna be hanging around nobody ain't got no money because
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: they just ain't.
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: And I'm not mad at people for that.
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: I'm not mad at people that's like, you know what,
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna hang around nobody that's broke.
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna hang around nobody ain't got no money.
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: I'm not gonna hang around nobody that ain't got themselves
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: together like I do.
• 39:45
  Speaker 1: And I am not in any capacity mad at it.
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: I'm not.
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: I feel like that in these situations that people need
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: to understand that it is okay.
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: But why you working a job? You need to figure
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: out what business.
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: You gonna do when you turn for it By the
• 40:00
  Speaker 2: turn you turn forty, you should be able to own
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: your own business. And even if it's later on, by
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: forty you should be able to retire seriously. But that's
• 40:09
  Speaker 2: only if you do it in the way I'm telling you,
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: don't have kids until you in your thirties, cause that
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: way you can, actually you can.
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: You can retire by fifty. By the time you retire
• 40:21
  Speaker 1: are your kids will be grown.
• 40:23
  Speaker 2: So it's I think it's better to have kids later
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: on in life than having them when they're when you're younger,
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: because I feel like by having them later on in life,
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: you don't have to worry about, you know, not giving
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: up your life because you've done it all.
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: And I think people need to get married later.
• 40:41
  Speaker 2: I think if people get married later, then it'll be
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: better off for them and it'll be better off for everybody.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: Else.
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: So, like I said, you know, I wish I would
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: have made that decision, but I didn't get pregnant because
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: I was being irresponsible the condom broke, but I.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: Wish I would have waited.
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: So I just tell people that don't worry about what
• 41:00
  Speaker 2: nobody else think. Do what makes you happy, do what
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: brings you joy, and that's it.
• 41:07
  Speaker 1: On that So.
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: At the end of the day, you just gotta do
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: what what works for you. At the end of the day,
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: like I said, I can't tell nobody what to do.
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: So you just gotta do whatever makes you happy and
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: whatever you know it's going to bring you joy.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: And that's just it.
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: So I'm not gonna sit here and tell somebody that
• 41:33
  Speaker 2: I think they should have kids at a young age.
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: I don't think nobody should be having kids. Matter of fact,
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: I don't even think teenagers should be dating at all
• 41:39
  Speaker 1: when they in they in their teens.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: I don't think no girls should be dating, no no
• 41:44
  Speaker 2: guidinghoil she grown. I don't think no boys should be
• 41:47
  Speaker 2: dating any females to they grown.
• 41:49
  Speaker 1: But then again, that's that's just me. That is just me.
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: But like I said, you know, it's it's crazy how
• 42:02
  Speaker 2: how this stuff is, but you know, we all have
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: our battles and things that we get to fight. So
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: all I always say to.
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: People is do what works for you, because you.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: Only got one life and you don't have a lot
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: of time. And a lot of people think they do.
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: There are people that are losing their lives within you know,
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: they they're losing their lives, and.
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: Some of them don't even make it to even being
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: three years old. Some people don't even make.
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: It to their twenty some some people pass away and
• 42:37
  Speaker 2: don't even have kids, don't have a legacy, they gone.
• 42:40
  Speaker 2: And what's crazy is when you leave deserve everybody for
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: maybe a few weeks, everybody remembers you. After a while,
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: they don't even think about you. They'll move on to
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: whatever's next. And some people they're never the same after
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: somebody pass away. So it it just really varies based
• 42:57
  Speaker 2: upon that.
• 42:59
  Speaker 1: But what I will say in conclusion to this is
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: that when you.
• 43:04
  Speaker 2: Mind your own business and you focus on yourself and
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: you do what's best for you and not base yourself
• 43:13
  Speaker 2: or anything that you do on other people, when you
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: don't worry about negative people and what they say and
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: what they think, because if people are stupid enough to
• 43:23
  Speaker 2: believe these people, then they just don't believe them. At
• 43:26
  Speaker 2: this point, they gonna believe them no matter what. So
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: even if you sit here and you try to argue
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: with somebody to the ground and try to say, well
• 43:36
  Speaker 2: that's not true, honey, you wasting your time at this
• 43:39
  Speaker 2: point because that person already has in their mind when
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: they think, and at the end of the day, they
• 43:43
  Speaker 2: want everybody to hate you. I feel like there's negativity
• 43:46
  Speaker 2: just moves things out the way that don't belong to
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: that way that your blessings and all the new things
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: meant that's gonna be coming in won't get impacted by
• 43:53
  Speaker 2: things that's gonna contaminate it.
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: So that's why I look at it.
• 43:57
  Speaker 2: If any if anybody can quickly move something or somebody
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: out your life, then they were never yours in the
• 44:04
  Speaker 2: first place. So I just wanted to come on here
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: and just have that conversation today and do that so
• 44:10
  Speaker 2: later on today I'll be doing my happier and you
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: leads to a healthier you, health and wellness channel.
• 44:15
  Speaker 1: So with that being said, I love y'all. I appreciate y'all.
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: If you want to do one on one coaching or
• 44:20
  Speaker 1: you want to be a guest on my podcast, or
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: you just like the commentary and want to send me
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: a letter or send me a dear Aunsha letter of
• 44:27
  Speaker 1: something you're going through. Please email me at.
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: A s h A dot M A r I A
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: M A zero one at gmail dot com.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: It's a SAJA dot.
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: M A R I A M A zero one at
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: gmail dot com. So with that being said, I love y'all.
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: There will be guests on this podcast coming really soon.
• 44:46
  Speaker 2: I'm excited to be able to let y'all hear these interviews,
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: and you also can see the interview on YouTube. So
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: with that being said, I appreciate y'all, I love y'all,
• 44:57
  Speaker 2: and I will talk to y'all later.
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: Bye.