Latest / Locatora Radio [A Radiophonic Novela] / Capítulo 042: Talking Shit & Taking Selfies with Jayy Dodd

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Capítulo 042: Talking Shit & Taking Selfies with Jayy Dodd · Locatora Radio [A Radiophonic Novela]

0:02
Speaker 1: Radio Radio Radio Commies, a myth and bullshit radio phonic
0:16
Speaker 1: novella Local Radio hosted by Malamo. Hello, Hello, Hello, welcome
0:25
Speaker 1: back to local Radio. Welcome back, Welcome back. This is
0:28
Speaker 1: Mala and this is diosa were Radio coming to you
0:32
Speaker 1: once again from Radio Espasio, based out of EsPAS and
0:37
Speaker 1: boil His. Thank you for joining us, Thank you for
0:39
Speaker 1: tuning in once again. Local Radio is a radiophonic novella,
0:43
Speaker 1: a podcast archiving the brilliance and legacies of women and
0:46
Speaker 1: fans of color. Thank you, thank you, thank you for
0:49
Speaker 1: tuning into forty two. And we're back after a hiatus. Yes,
0:54
Speaker 1: we took a unexpected break for the month of June
0:59
Speaker 1: our last copy where we interviewed Julio Um. After that,
1:04
Speaker 1: we realized that June was so packed and we actually
1:07
Speaker 1: didn't have any saturdays available to record, so we took
1:10
Speaker 1: a break. But we were still hustling. We were still working,
1:13
Speaker 1: so we did take a break from recording, but we
1:15
Speaker 1: were still doing lots of ship. So we want to
1:17
Speaker 1: recap somehow we were podcasting without podcasting. Yeah, it was
1:21
Speaker 1: really interesting. Yeah, we like just we could not record,
1:24
Speaker 1: We couldn't didn't have any saturdays. Available and so to
1:28
Speaker 1: start UM. We actually the first weekend, the first Saturday
1:32
Speaker 1: of June, we actually gave a workshop for the at
1:35
Speaker 1: the third Annual Latino Conference organized by Council member Current Price,
1:39
Speaker 1: he represents District nine, and that was l T Tech
1:43
Speaker 1: and we did our intro to Latin x Tech intro
1:47
Speaker 1: to podcasting for youth and it was so amazing to
1:51
Speaker 1: work with these youth and teach them about our origin
1:55
Speaker 1: story and where we how we started and basically our
1:58
Speaker 1: podcast is completely d I Y do it yourself, so
2:02
Speaker 1: sharing that with them and basically that they have all
2:04
Speaker 1: the tools that they need within themselves UM to start
2:07
Speaker 1: a podcast or to start any type of platform that
2:09
Speaker 1: they want UM. And it was so good because our
2:12
Speaker 1: activity we do like an interactive activity with our youth
2:15
Speaker 1: or with any time we do this is UM. We
2:17
Speaker 1: have them break up into groups and we have them
2:19
Speaker 1: create their own podcast. So they have to create their
2:22
Speaker 1: podcast title, UM, decide if they want personalities like the
2:26
Speaker 1: way we do UM, if they have a jingle, what
2:28
Speaker 1: would it sound like and what would their first episode
2:31
Speaker 1: be like? And would they have any taglines like les
2:33
Speaker 1: Mammies a myth and bullshit Radio. Yeah, um, what's ideas
2:38
Speaker 1: for the names of like a first episode, and they
2:40
Speaker 1: came up with some cute ones. There was there was
2:42
Speaker 1: one my favorite one last I was going to say
2:45
Speaker 1: that one. So they wanted to do a foodie podcast. Yes,
2:48
Speaker 1: and the catch was that you would they would make
2:51
Speaker 1: whatever they had in their fridge and they called it.
2:53
Speaker 1: They said, like it's fridge and delicious. That was their catch.
2:58
Speaker 1: It was so cute, fridge and delicious. Yeah, and these
3:01
Speaker 1: were these were you know, for the most part, it
3:03
Speaker 1: was a mixed gender group, but it was a Latina conference,
3:06
Speaker 1: so the focus was for you know girls, UM, so
3:09
Speaker 1: for Latinas who are in high school or elementary schools
3:12
Speaker 1: in the local area in South l A. So a
3:15
Speaker 1: lot of fun. Thank you to council member Current Price
3:18
Speaker 1: for having yes, and to our localmotor listener Genevieve. She's
3:21
Speaker 1: the one that approached us UM with this opportunity, So
3:24
Speaker 1: thank you so much, We appreciate you, We love you
3:27
Speaker 1: so much. UM. And also we got like certificates of
3:31
Speaker 1: recognition from the City of l a and with our
3:35
Speaker 1: podcast names. So I thought that that was like, yeah, okay,
3:39
Speaker 1: it was cool. It was cute, It was cool. It
3:41
Speaker 1: was cool to see City of l a like official
3:46
Speaker 1: official loved love that so that, but that's not all
3:50
Speaker 1: that we did. That's not all that we did. More
3:52
Speaker 1: real quick, because I'm thinking about the month of June,
3:54
Speaker 1: I want to shout out Sebastian Ka of Gothic on Cheeseman.
4:02
Speaker 1: He just um, he walked this past June and he
4:05
Speaker 1: received his doctor in Chicana Chican Chicana studies. So so
4:10
Speaker 1: proud of him for y'all that don't know, like we're
4:12
Speaker 1: podcast friends, but he's also my best friend. We've known
4:15
Speaker 1: each other for years now, so I just want to
4:17
Speaker 1: congratulate him on the air. Um, you gotta fit you know,
4:21
Speaker 1: finish that dissertation boo, Like we love you and yeah,
4:24
Speaker 1: keep doing what you're doing. Dr Yes, it's very exciting.
4:28
Speaker 1: Dr Puppy, very Dr Puppy. Congrats to all of the
4:31
Speaker 1: grab yes, all of our listeners who graduated. You know
4:34
Speaker 1: you got through it, you finished, you got your degree,
4:37
Speaker 1: you've got your certification, whatever it is that you accomplished
4:40
Speaker 1: this year. Congratulations. Yes, I'm sure it was hard. We
4:43
Speaker 1: know it's hard. We see you. Good job enshoy your summer. Um.
4:49
Speaker 1: So then another really really really really exciting event that
4:52
Speaker 1: we were a part of. So for the past five years, UM,
4:55
Speaker 1: the Los Angeles Latino International Film Festival was on a
4:58
Speaker 1: hiatus and it came back this year. There were other
5:02
Speaker 1: Latino film festivals taking place. There was a Central American
5:05
Speaker 1: Film Festival that's been going on the past four years,
5:07
Speaker 1: and there was also like a Queer Latin X film
5:10
Speaker 1: Festival Yeah yeah, taking place, and I think the City
5:13
Speaker 1: of Long Beach their LGBT Center, they also do a
5:15
Speaker 1: film festival yearly. So there have been some you know,
5:18
Speaker 1: throughout this hiatus, but this particular one hadn't been producing
5:23
Speaker 1: the festival because I have been working on their youth
5:25
Speaker 1: cinema projects UM in the past five years, so that
5:28
Speaker 1: there was their focus, and then they brought it back
5:30
Speaker 1: this year. But with the twist, they added all this
5:32
Speaker 1: all these different components to the to the film festival.
5:35
Speaker 1: They had La Leaf Art which is what was a
5:38
Speaker 1: part of. They had a digital which is what we
5:40
Speaker 1: were a part of, and music and all these different
5:44
Speaker 1: things Legacy which is the youth component, the youth filmmaker
5:47
Speaker 1: La Leaf Music. So we were really really really like
5:51
Speaker 1: fortunate and honored to be included in the programming. So
5:56
Speaker 1: rafaelin we want to shout out Rafael, who's a writer
5:59
Speaker 1: on Jane the Verse gin and it's like one of
6:01
Speaker 1: the Latin X like TV writers who's really out there
6:04
Speaker 1: and like really doing it and creating and getting projects
6:06
Speaker 1: off the ground. Um. And so Raphael had reached out
6:09
Speaker 1: to us and asked us if we would be interested
6:12
Speaker 1: in helping to co moderate podcast panel along with one
6:17
Speaker 1: of our favorite podcasts, Latinos to Lunch. And so the
6:21
Speaker 1: idea was that, you know, look Latino to Lunch. We
6:24
Speaker 1: were going to go as a part of the film
6:25
Speaker 1: festival and interview and a few of the cast members
6:30
Speaker 1: of Tanya's new show Vita, which is on the Stars Network. Yes,
6:34
Speaker 1: if you have not checked that out, um, it's so good.
6:38
Speaker 1: They so the first season has six episodes and it
6:40
Speaker 1: was picked up for a second season. So congrats to
6:42
Speaker 1: Dania and all the creators and everyone working on that team.
6:46
Speaker 1: The writers are actually all latin X, so the writing
6:49
Speaker 1: room is all Latino X writers and I think that
6:52
Speaker 1: that really um shows in the authenticity of what they're doing.
6:57
Speaker 1: And you y'all will be able to hear that conversation
7:00
Speaker 1: because we actually have the audio for you, so we
7:02
Speaker 1: were going to be distributing that within the next week,
7:04
Speaker 1: so keep your eye out if you couldn't make it,
7:06
Speaker 1: and thank you to our localot is. It did make it.
7:09
Speaker 1: So we saw y'all in the in the audience, so
7:11
Speaker 1: thank you so much to everyone that was there. Also
7:14
Speaker 1: to thank you to PoCA Stio Network and to Lose
7:17
Speaker 1: Um Linda Garcia Lose Warrior for coordinate, coordinating and you know,
7:23
Speaker 1: helping us with this opportunity. So it was a lot
7:26
Speaker 1: of fun. We met, We met Edward James on Us
7:28
Speaker 1: Malla chased him down. I chased him down rather unsuccessfully,
7:31
Speaker 1: but I did. I chased him. I saw Jimmy Smith's
7:35
Speaker 1: and I wanted to die and I told my mom.
7:36
Speaker 1: I was like, mom, and I haven't stopped talking about
7:38
Speaker 1: it because I love Jimmy Smith. He's so fine. Also, um,
7:42
Speaker 1: I'm like horrified. I don't remember his name right now,
7:45
Speaker 1: But okay, did y'all watch the very gramaticized version of
7:49
Speaker 1: Selea Cruz's Life and Telemundo it's also on Netflix. Well.
7:52
Speaker 1: The actor that plays Bero, which is Celea Cruz's husband,
7:55
Speaker 1: and they like work together in Last Uma and he
8:02
Speaker 1: was there the after Pedro. He was there like he was.
8:04
Speaker 1: We saw him multiple times like in the past two
8:07
Speaker 1: weeks and it was like, I'm like that, you cannot
8:10
Speaker 1: fandgirl right over him. I just don't do it. I
8:13
Speaker 1: didn't do it to his face. I did do it. Tomala.
8:16
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, easier and he's so
8:18
Speaker 1: cute and like this is dead. Role was dying. We
8:21
Speaker 1: also after lalif at the after the opening, Oh my god,
8:26
Speaker 1: it's so much, so much to share, Okay, cal Lazo
8:32
Speaker 1: Calazo of the cat call our friend Cat she was here. Um,
8:36
Speaker 1: she came for vidcomn and she was also came to
8:38
Speaker 1: the laalaf opening and the film. The opening, the film
8:42
Speaker 1: that they opened with what's incredible called the Sentence. Oh
8:44
Speaker 1: my god, I'm realizing we have so much to say,
8:46
Speaker 1: we have so much to say. Let's let's just keep going, Okay,
8:48
Speaker 1: the sentil This was on opening night of the Latino
8:51
Speaker 1: International Film Festival. Yes, so the Sentence of the film.
8:54
Speaker 1: They're actually going to be debuting it on HBO in October.
8:57
Speaker 1: To keep your eye out. And it's an incredible documentary
9:00
Speaker 1: about the story of a woman that's incarcerated and She's
9:04
Speaker 1: given a minimum sentence of fifteen years for um basically
9:09
Speaker 1: being an inconspiracy and being an accessory in a crime.
9:12
Speaker 1: Because her partner at the time, her boyfriend, was a
9:15
Speaker 1: drug dealer, and because she lived in the home where
9:17
Speaker 1: he was doing the drugs and keeping these weapons, she
9:20
Speaker 1: was now a conspirator. She was charged. She was charged
9:24
Speaker 1: with the exact same crimes that he was exactly and
9:27
Speaker 1: the catch. The catch is that the boyfriend had actually
9:31
Speaker 1: been murdered, so he you know, he died right, and
9:34
Speaker 1: she served the time for his crimes. So it was
9:37
Speaker 1: this horrible, horrible, horrible thing that happened to her. And
9:40
Speaker 1: she had three daughters. When she was she was completely
9:44
Speaker 1: separated from her family, which we know is like, you know,
9:47
Speaker 1: we're talking like, not only are our folks at the
9:50
Speaker 1: border being you know, wrongfully detained and kept in these cages,
9:53
Speaker 1: but we also see that families are being separated when
9:57
Speaker 1: the majority of black and brown men and women are
9:59
Speaker 1: in serrated So families are being separated. You're not not
10:02
Speaker 1: only at the border, but also in the prison industrial
10:04
Speaker 1: complex in both contexts, both contexts. Yeah, and the story unfold.
10:10
Speaker 1: Her brother, who was the filmmaker He also was the
10:13
Speaker 1: one who filmed like nine years of her three daughters
10:16
Speaker 1: growing up without her, their attempts to um file for
10:21
Speaker 1: appeals and being denied and then filing for Obama's clemency program.
10:25
Speaker 1: And we're not going to give away the end because
10:28
Speaker 1: it's incredible, but all of us were puddles. We were
10:30
Speaker 1: in tears, like, oh my god, like it was super emotional,
10:35
Speaker 1: like there was a happy ending, but oh my god,
10:39
Speaker 1: just the whole story, the journey, and she was there
10:42
Speaker 1: and then she was there at the film. That was
10:44
Speaker 1: so emotional. Yeah, so really good. So look out for
10:47
Speaker 1: that the sentence. So then we went to and after
10:50
Speaker 1: the after the screening, we went to an after party
10:53
Speaker 1: at the Roosevelt, Right, So we go and Cats with
10:56
Speaker 1: us and we're just like working the room. We're working
10:59
Speaker 1: the room her pictures, seeing like you know, just being
11:03
Speaker 1: seen being seen, seeing who we can see. As Cat
11:05
Speaker 1: called it, peacocking, we were pea cocking. We saw the
11:11
Speaker 1: actor who plays Pedro in Napoleon's Dynamite. I flipped out.
11:18
Speaker 1: I flipped out. And then there were two other kind
11:21
Speaker 1: of prominent like latin X like ch kind of actor show.
11:24
Speaker 1: The show remained unnamed and unidentifiable. There are two of them, right, well, yeah, okay,
11:32
Speaker 1: so one of them, right, he ends up, but we
11:35
Speaker 1: can see him kind of like looking over at our table.
11:37
Speaker 1: Oh my god, hardcore like the whole night, and he
11:41
Speaker 1: instantly right, So he comes over and he talks to us,
11:45
Speaker 1: and he mainly like talks to Kat, and Kat reveals
11:48
Speaker 1: that she actually has seen him at the meet Do office.
11:51
Speaker 1: So she says like, oh, I think you were at
11:54
Speaker 1: the meet Do office. I think I've seen you, and
11:56
Speaker 1: he goes oh, and he goes, are you the receptionist? Yep,
12:00
Speaker 1: he said that. He said that. He said that, which
12:03
Speaker 1: is fine if she were the receptionists. That the media
12:06
Speaker 1: assumption that she can't be a video producer, she can't
12:08
Speaker 1: be a on screen talent, she can't be a creator. Right.
12:13
Speaker 1: We know we know that this is that women are
12:14
Speaker 1: always given that that role of the secretary of the receptionists. Right,
12:18
Speaker 1: We're at a Latino International Film festival, and his immediate
12:22
Speaker 1: assumption is that she is the receptionist, right, So it
12:25
Speaker 1: was just very misogynistic and codit coded sexism, right, and
12:28
Speaker 1: Cad just goes, yeah, I am I am the receptionist.
12:31
Speaker 1: She kind of just played it off, right, hold on,
12:33
Speaker 1: plotius plot tois because my life, your phone isn't working,
12:36
Speaker 1: so you didn't see this text. He actually damned her
12:38
Speaker 1: a few days ago. I don't know if I'm allowed
12:40
Speaker 1: to read that. Let's say this, actually you already fuck Okay, sorry, sorry,
12:46
Speaker 1: it's okay, okay, I'm gonna text her tell her. We
12:48
Speaker 1: still don't know who this person is, right, But anyway,
12:51
Speaker 1: So then back to that night. Wait, wait, hold on,
12:53
Speaker 1: he danced her and he says, Cad, you're famous, and
12:56
Speaker 1: she replied, no, I'm just the receptionist. This yeah, this,
12:59
Speaker 1: I love cats. I like you love cat Queen of
13:03
Speaker 1: the clap Backs TV. These fools need to learn. They
13:07
Speaker 1: need to learn to think before they speak. What it
13:10
Speaker 1: could have all all you have to say. It was
13:12
Speaker 1: like what do you do exactly? That's all you have
13:14
Speaker 1: to say. It's like, oh, I don't remember seeing you, like,
13:17
Speaker 1: remind me, remind me what you do? There? Him and
13:19
Speaker 1: one other guy that like, if you saw their faces,
13:21
Speaker 1: you know that you've seen them in movies. They've been
13:23
Speaker 1: in a bunch of movies. I'm not gonna lie. They
13:26
Speaker 1: usually play secondary roles. They usually play supporting roles, you
13:29
Speaker 1: know what I mean, which is fine, it's cool, but
13:31
Speaker 1: they're recognizable. So they're sitting there there talking to us,
13:34
Speaker 1: and then they're asking us like, oh, do you guys
13:36
Speaker 1: want drinks? Right? So, and they asked us. We didn't
13:40
Speaker 1: even bring up drinks. Who didn't mention drinks, We didn't
13:43
Speaker 1: say anything about drinks. These two guys asked us, if
13:46
Speaker 1: you want drinks? There was an open bar, but it
13:48
Speaker 1: was only open up until a certain time that it
13:50
Speaker 1: was a cash bar. And then the drinks were like
13:52
Speaker 1: eighteen dollars a drink, right, So they offer and then
13:55
Speaker 1: they go over to get his drinks and then they
13:57
Speaker 1: all says like, oh my god, Molla, you should go
13:58
Speaker 1: with them to like watch the drinks to make sure
14:00
Speaker 1: that it's right. We're like, one of us needs to go,
14:02
Speaker 1: my legoes, I'll go. So I'm like, true, good idea.
14:04
Speaker 1: So I go, and I'm up there with them and
14:06
Speaker 1: they and the bartender tells them like, it's not open anymore.
14:10
Speaker 1: It's a cash bar. It's eighteen bucks to drink. And
14:12
Speaker 1: then and then the rude guy, the guy that was
14:15
Speaker 1: rude to cat the actor, he turns to me and
14:18
Speaker 1: he looks at me and he goes, you guys want
14:19
Speaker 1: to drink that bad? I'm like you God. So then
14:25
Speaker 1: they ran to the other bar and brought us waters.
14:28
Speaker 1: They brought us waters Latino Hollywood first l negative point.
14:37
Speaker 1: I'm sorry so far. But the women that we were amazing.
14:42
Speaker 1: The women that we met were American. The Latinos in
14:44
Speaker 1: Hollywood were amazing. The men need to help, need some guidance.
14:50
Speaker 1: So that was funny. So hopefully as we do more
14:53
Speaker 1: stuff in Hollywood will have more of these stories, and
14:55
Speaker 1: we'll have we'll have celebrity tea, celebrity cheese man to
14:59
Speaker 1: share with you. All that will remain anonymous, unnamed. Yeah,
15:01
Speaker 1: I'm going to tell you about the events, not the people,
15:05
Speaker 1: right anyway, Okay, So then to wrap up the month,
15:10
Speaker 1: um were just the other day we had a film.
15:14
Speaker 1: We were a part of a panel in film screening
15:17
Speaker 1: at the Lost Fields Vintage Theater. So American Entertainment Media
15:23
Speaker 1: reached out to us because they were filming. I'm sorry,
15:25
Speaker 1: they were screening the film. Sorry to bother you. Um.
15:29
Speaker 1: This is a new film by Boots Riley, who is
15:33
Speaker 1: a movie maker out of the Bay Area, starring Lakeith Stanfield,
15:37
Speaker 1: an Tessa Thompson, UM, the movie is incredible. It's incredible,
15:42
Speaker 1: it's funny, it's bizarre, it's surreal, it's political, it's it's gory.
15:48
Speaker 1: Like it was, we were looking away like constantly throughout
15:51
Speaker 1: the movie because it was kind of aggressive, um, but
15:55
Speaker 1: it was really really good. Now, this panel that was
15:58
Speaker 1: put together was very interesting for us because a, the
16:03
Speaker 1: film is a predominantly black film, UM from the creators,
16:07
Speaker 1: the directors, the stars of the film. UM, Tessa Thompson
16:10
Speaker 1: is a Latina. And so the idea behind the panel,
16:14
Speaker 1: like when we first they reached out to us, was
16:16
Speaker 1: that what we would be moderating the panel with the
16:19
Speaker 1: talent with Tessa and Lakeith. Yes, that was the original
16:22
Speaker 1: um intention of the organizers that so we got there
16:26
Speaker 1: and that's not what ended up happening, and it ended
16:28
Speaker 1: up being a panel with like latin X. They called
16:30
Speaker 1: us like thought leaders UM, so it was us look
16:34
Speaker 1: and then there were some folks who like have backgrounds
16:36
Speaker 1: with u c L A labor center and like community
16:39
Speaker 1: organizing work. And it turned out that none of the
16:43
Speaker 1: panelists were after latinos or black or black at all,
16:47
Speaker 1: which was not the original plan. And so we were
16:51
Speaker 1: not sure what our role was in the context of
16:55
Speaker 1: the film because it really didn't have anything to do
16:58
Speaker 1: with us. But I guess what this particular, this series
17:03
Speaker 1: of movie panels that this group has been doing is
17:06
Speaker 1: they want to bring in black and brown film and
17:11
Speaker 1: speakers and like panelists and creators and do like combined
17:16
Speaker 1: events to bring the two communities together. So that was
17:20
Speaker 1: sort of the idea behind it. So we were talking
17:22
Speaker 1: about labor in the movie and connecting it to all
17:25
Speaker 1: of our different experiences, violence against women, violence from labor, exploitation,
17:33
Speaker 1: all that stuff. So that was that. And then DJ Sooty,
17:37
Speaker 1: who played our life party who we love. She DJ
17:41
Speaker 1: the after party, the reception, so that was always cool
17:44
Speaker 1: to see her so good. She's amazing and she's beautiful.
17:47
Speaker 1: She's so beautiful. She wore like this really beautiful mustard
17:50
Speaker 1: yellow coat like a trench coat but like as a dress,
17:53
Speaker 1: and she looked fun. She gives me very much like
17:56
Speaker 1: cross between Rihanna and Selena vibes in her. She had
18:01
Speaker 1: a high pony and a dark lip. Yes, she she
18:04
Speaker 1: gives me that energy like with with what she wears.
18:07
Speaker 1: Love it. So I love dj um So. Then yesterday.
18:12
Speaker 1: Yesterday we were on Dash radio. Yesterday, we were on
18:16
Speaker 1: Dash Radio and we were invited from the show umunrimo
18:23
Speaker 1: and um it is a show that is co hosted
18:27
Speaker 1: or yeah, I mean because there's three of them, DJ
18:31
Speaker 1: did By, DJ Sasha Be, DJ My Goodness and hay
18:35
Speaker 1: L DJ UM and so this is like the number
18:38
Speaker 1: one show on like Dash Latin x UM. So. I
18:42
Speaker 1: was actually at Gania Rumbar one day with Franny and
18:44
Speaker 1: Monica and I was gone off the branch Mimosas and
18:49
Speaker 1: Harvey had spoken to me at Gania all about his
18:51
Speaker 1: show and I forgot about it, and the next day
18:53
Speaker 1: he dammed me and like invited us to go on.
18:55
Speaker 1: So we were like yes, sure, so we went and
18:57
Speaker 1: we were there for like three hours talking UM DJ
19:00
Speaker 1: I should be love you girl. Yeah, nice to meet you.
19:04
Speaker 1: But you know, it was kind of interesting because like
19:06
Speaker 1: we go on there to talk about the podcast and
19:08
Speaker 1: talk about like what we do about yeah, and we
19:12
Speaker 1: just you know, we forget what it's like to talk
19:15
Speaker 1: to straight men because we don't do it that off. No,
19:17
Speaker 1: we don't. UM, and you know, we're thankful for the opportunity. Definitely. Um,
19:22
Speaker 1: it was very much like Devil's Advocate kind of conversation. Um,
19:27
Speaker 1: when we talked about violence against women, like one of
19:30
Speaker 1: them brought up, um, well, what about the women that
19:33
Speaker 1: falsely accused men of rape? Which Mala of course has
19:37
Speaker 1: all the statistics, and she's like, actually that's only two percent,
19:40
Speaker 1: and of even all of the allegations, the do process
19:46
Speaker 1: is like non existent essentially, So Mama has all these
19:48
Speaker 1: facts and all this experience obviously because of what she does,
19:51
Speaker 1: and still being antagonized and still being questioned and this
19:55
Speaker 1: whole like, well, like what about you know, what about
19:58
Speaker 1: what the women doing? These these men like, and not
20:01
Speaker 1: just these particular men, but in general, across the board,
20:04
Speaker 1: we can see that men have issues with women in Instagram.
20:09
Speaker 1: That has been a topic of conversation across the board.
20:12
Speaker 1: When it's so interesting when straight men want to like
20:15
Speaker 1: derail a conversation and show us an example of like
20:18
Speaker 1: women behaving badly or like women needing to be held
20:22
Speaker 1: accountable or women doing something wrong, they always start with like, oh, well,
20:26
Speaker 1: like let's say, you know these girls that post bikini
20:28
Speaker 1: picks on Instagram. These two separate guys yesterday like brought
20:31
Speaker 1: that up in different scenarios as like an entry point
20:34
Speaker 1: into talking about women misbehaving all they like have an
20:39
Speaker 1: issue with women in bikinis on Instagram for some reason,
20:42
Speaker 1: for some reason, a woman in a bikini is having
20:45
Speaker 1: a low standard for herself, right, And that's That's not
20:48
Speaker 1: exactly what they said, but that was my takeaway that
20:52
Speaker 1: I'm paraphrasing. I'm like, oh, so, what you mean is
20:55
Speaker 1: everyone has low standards these days, quote and like an
21:00
Speaker 1: anger at the fact that they're They were also very
21:03
Speaker 1: salty and these guys are DJs, right, they were very
21:05
Speaker 1: salty that there are women DJs who post lots of
21:09
Speaker 1: as they would refer to it, there's traps or bikini picks,
21:12
Speaker 1: and not that many DJ picks, so they must be
21:14
Speaker 1: frauds and ruined. They ruined dejaying for all other women
21:18
Speaker 1: DJs that don't post those kinds of photos. And then
21:20
Speaker 1: we look at their instagrams and it's like, like you
21:23
Speaker 1: were pointing out, these are paid at these are sponsored photos.
21:26
Speaker 1: It's obvious, like the tags, the tags that they use,
21:30
Speaker 1: all everyone that's tag in the actual photo, like all
21:32
Speaker 1: like the closing layer and the photographers and stuff. This
21:34
Speaker 1: is obviously a sponsored photo. So what I'm hearing is
21:37
Speaker 1: that you don't want women to make money off of
21:40
Speaker 1: maybe their looks or whatever it is that they're making
21:42
Speaker 1: their money off of. I'm like, if I'm if someone
21:45
Speaker 1: were to reach out to MoMA and I, um, this
21:47
Speaker 1: is also a hint if you were to reach out
21:49
Speaker 1: to us and be like, hey, um, can we're gonna
21:51
Speaker 1: send you this, um these bikinis for the summer, and
21:54
Speaker 1: um can you post them and tag us and we're
21:56
Speaker 1: gonna pay you five Do you think we're gonna say no? Realistically,
22:00
Speaker 1: we're going to say yes, I love bikini picks. Yes,
22:02
Speaker 1: we have a bunch from last summer. We need to
22:04
Speaker 1: retake some new. It was because it was so funny
22:06
Speaker 1: because here these guys are talking about like, yeah, like
22:09
Speaker 1: when girls post all these bikini picks and we're like, yeah,
22:11
Speaker 1: like me, like my Instagram right now and pictures of
22:13
Speaker 1: me in my bikini on my Instagram right now? Are
22:16
Speaker 1: you talking about me? Right? And they it's always done.
22:19
Speaker 1: Is like we're talking about literal sexual assault, we're talking
22:22
Speaker 1: about misogyny and rape culture, and they're one example that
22:26
Speaker 1: they always lead with is the bikini picks. It's always
22:28
Speaker 1: I don't get it's always these like also like out
22:31
Speaker 1: of sight examples, and I'm like, okay, can we stop
22:34
Speaker 1: derailing the conversation. Can we bring it back to what
22:36
Speaker 1: we were talking about? You? And you know, I'm assuming
22:40
Speaker 1: at the very least you know that Logal thought our
22:42
Speaker 1: radio was about feminism. At the very least, you may
22:44
Speaker 1: not know like exactly what topics we talk about, but
22:47
Speaker 1: you can probably assume that we're going to have some
22:49
Speaker 1: pretty feminist ship to say, so completely feminist. Yeah, I
22:52
Speaker 1: was kind of taken aback. Also, like hiring, it was time.
22:56
Speaker 1: It was tiring because I thought that we were there
22:58
Speaker 1: to talk about our podcast, and it ends it being
23:01
Speaker 1: that same old like we get trapped into arguing with them.
23:05
Speaker 1: It's goes into circles and then and now I'm upset
23:07
Speaker 1: and now I'm yelling, and now I'm like destabilized and
23:11
Speaker 1: like I'm now I'm having a bad day when that
23:13
Speaker 1: didn't need to be the case. So I don't know,
23:17
Speaker 1: we just like have to I think it's just like
23:19
Speaker 1: we have to like remember that if we're going into
23:22
Speaker 1: a space with an interview with straight man, we can
23:24
Speaker 1: expect that this will be the dynamic. So we either
23:27
Speaker 1: decide not to do it at all, or that we
23:30
Speaker 1: go in with a specific sort of plan that like,
23:32
Speaker 1: we do engage these comments or we don't engage these comments.
23:36
Speaker 1: I didn't expect the conversation to get there at all
23:39
Speaker 1: at all. Neither neither. Yeah. I also thought like we
23:43
Speaker 1: were there for the three hours, so um, and we
23:45
Speaker 1: didn't talk the entire time because it is a it
23:47
Speaker 1: is a amused music um station, so UM. We didn't
23:52
Speaker 1: expect to necessarily be there the full three hours. So
23:55
Speaker 1: it was it was a lot. It was a lot. Um.
23:58
Speaker 1: The episode is up on their channel. I mean, if
24:01
Speaker 1: anyone wants to, if you want a tune in, it
24:04
Speaker 1: will make you mad. If your local mood, you're not
24:05
Speaker 1: going to be happy, you're not gonna like it. But
24:07
Speaker 1: we we tried to hold our own and we represented
24:10
Speaker 1: ourselves and you know, we talked our ship and we
24:12
Speaker 1: talked about what we believe in because you know, we
24:14
Speaker 1: don't care about those fuckers and how they feel are
24:16
Speaker 1: their opinions. But yeah, be angry with us. You could
24:19
Speaker 1: comment on their ship if you want. If you can
24:21
Speaker 1: comment on the Instagram if you feel like it. Anyways,
24:26
Speaker 1: onto another segment. Of oh yea look us all right, right, okay,
24:33
Speaker 1: so this question. So we are at the end of June,
24:35
Speaker 1: so happy Pride Month, Happy Pride month. Pride is all
24:39
Speaker 1: year round. We know it's not just the month of June,
24:42
Speaker 1: but also we want to like always remember and celebrate
24:45
Speaker 1: the trans women of color, the queer women that lead
24:50
Speaker 1: um the stonewall riots. Right, so Pride it is definitely
24:53
Speaker 1: has developed into this very like corporate um like party,
24:57
Speaker 1: which is fine because the party is political. But we
25:00
Speaker 1: also have to remember that it started because of the
25:03
Speaker 1: trans women. We're tired of being brutalized by the police,
25:07
Speaker 1: so we have to remember that it started as a riot.
25:08
Speaker 1: So I just want to hold space and give honor
25:10
Speaker 1: to our our queer ancestors, our fem ancestors, UM. And
25:14
Speaker 1: now let's get into this question. Yes go friend months Okay, So,
25:18
Speaker 1: in honor of Pride Month twenty gayteen, what are your
25:22
Speaker 1: favorite queer memories moments that make you smile and be
25:25
Speaker 1: happy even though our identities are really rough sometimes to
25:28
Speaker 1: imagine good moments. I okay, So my friend Alyssa recently
25:33
Speaker 1: sent me this picture that I posted to my Instagram,
25:36
Speaker 1: and it's like the four of us as little girls
25:38
Speaker 1: in our Jane skirts. Okay, well tell me why now
25:41
Speaker 1: years later three out of the four of all those
25:43
Speaker 1: little girls are like queer. But we never talked about
25:46
Speaker 1: it as kids. We were all hanging out so like me, Lilia, um, Alyssa,
25:51
Speaker 1: Kathy not so much, but her sister Caroline, yes, and
25:55
Speaker 1: so you know what I mean. But like we all
25:56
Speaker 1: grew up together, but we never had those conversations about
25:59
Speaker 1: our sexuality and we kind of just grew into adult
26:02
Speaker 1: women who just like see each other and understand each
26:05
Speaker 1: other and like talking about you know, like who we're
26:08
Speaker 1: dating or who we're hooking up with. Um, and just
26:10
Speaker 1: kind of like looking back and seeing like, well, we
26:12
Speaker 1: were always here with each other, you know what I mean,
26:15
Speaker 1: just sort of being ourselves and just never pushing each
26:19
Speaker 1: other on it, and you know what I mean, Like
26:21
Speaker 1: it was just interesting to me, like to see it
26:23
Speaker 1: and it made me smile. Oh, I love that, And
26:25
Speaker 1: it's such a cute picture. It's a very cute picture.
26:27
Speaker 1: And that was, like Vann said my sister that that
26:30
Speaker 1: was the first that picture is the first day that
26:32
Speaker 1: Alyssa ever wear a skirt. Because Alyssa is very Alyssa's
26:36
Speaker 1: very mask. Like Alyssa's very mask, you know, but like
26:38
Speaker 1: back then, like when you're little girls, the whole thing
26:41
Speaker 1: is like we all dress a lot, right, and usually
26:43
Speaker 1: your mom, your thea's they will put you in dresses
26:45
Speaker 1: and skirts even if you don't like it, right, And
26:48
Speaker 1: I've like heard like queer women that are more math
26:50
Speaker 1: centered say that, Like when I was little, they would
26:52
Speaker 1: always make me wear dresses and I hated it. Right.
26:55
Speaker 1: So it was interesting because I remember, like Alyssa specifically,
26:58
Speaker 1: was always kind of like playing around with her style
27:01
Speaker 1: and with her clothes, and there were times where like
27:04
Speaker 1: as groups, it was really fun for all of us
27:06
Speaker 1: together and for her to like we're doing face masks,
27:09
Speaker 1: were dressing up, we're doing the makeup right, and then
27:11
Speaker 1: seeing her come into her own now, you know, and
27:13
Speaker 1: like really owning her style and just being herself and
27:17
Speaker 1: it's cute. I love that. I love that. Um. Okay,
27:20
Speaker 1: So I went to an all girls Catholic school, um,
27:24
Speaker 1: and it was yeah, it was very queer and um,
27:28
Speaker 1: a lot of a lot of the faculty was queer
27:30
Speaker 1: as well, and so it was really it was really interesting.
27:33
Speaker 1: Even though I went to Graslic school. I feel like
27:35
Speaker 1: I had like a lot of people, and a lot
27:39
Speaker 1: in like the relative sense that it was like a
27:41
Speaker 1: school of like four people, right, So not not a
27:43
Speaker 1: lot of us were queer, but a lot of girls
27:45
Speaker 1: were like kind of like experimenting with their sexuality. Anyway,
27:48
Speaker 1: the point is my father sent me to a all
27:50
Speaker 1: girls Catholic school because he did not want me to
27:53
Speaker 1: be distracted by boys. It was like, Bobby, I'm actually
27:57
Speaker 1: queer as buck. So for a good part of like
28:01
Speaker 1: my teenage years and even early twenties identified as a lesbian.
28:04
Speaker 1: So now identify as queer. But anyway, UM to continue
28:09
Speaker 1: on to like the Catholic the Catholicism, right, and like
28:12
Speaker 1: the queerness. So I um was supposed to be UM confirmed.
28:17
Speaker 1: I was supposed to be confirmed, but I knew I
28:19
Speaker 1: was queer, and I was like, Mom, I don't want
28:21
Speaker 1: to be confirmed, and she like made me. And my
28:22
Speaker 1: mom wasn't even like a practicing Catholic, but she made me.
28:26
Speaker 1: Maybe she like was trying to save my soul at
28:28
Speaker 1: the time. Who freaking notes, right, But anyway, the point
28:30
Speaker 1: is I was confirmed, but I technically like have never
28:34
Speaker 1: been confirmed because I didn't go to a retreat that
28:36
Speaker 1: I was supposed to go to. So the retreat that
28:39
Speaker 1: I was supposed to go to actually landed on um
28:43
Speaker 1: l A we Hope Pride. So I didn't tell my
28:48
Speaker 1: mom that I didn't go to the retreat. Instead, I
28:50
Speaker 1: went to Pride, and I was fifteen, and I went
28:54
Speaker 1: with my first girlfriend and are my friend at the time,
28:57
Speaker 1: and like we went and we were like little just
29:00
Speaker 1: like little queer kids, you know, like Pride. We were
29:02
Speaker 1: too young to even do anything. We were fifteen. We
29:04
Speaker 1: were there, yeah, we were there, were there. I think
29:07
Speaker 1: the first time I went to Pride was actually with
29:09
Speaker 1: Lilia and Alissa, who interesting it was with Leah and Alissa,
29:12
Speaker 1: and we took the bus and we like walked for
29:15
Speaker 1: miles and miles because you know, it's so hard to
29:16
Speaker 1: get there. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. That's like
29:20
Speaker 1: when it like baby queer memory for me. Cute. That's
29:24
Speaker 1: a good question, good question, Thank you, thank you for
29:27
Speaker 1: that question. Um well, now we're coming towards like our break.
29:33
Speaker 1: We have a special guest who's going to be joining
29:35
Speaker 1: us the second half after our song break, Jay Dodd,
29:39
Speaker 1: who is a poet who is a creative, a filmmaker,
29:42
Speaker 1: one of my dear friends, um from college. So we're
29:45
Speaker 1: gonna bring Jay on the second half and and and
30:04
Speaker 1: and um m of it and little ship. Okay, look,
30:36
Speaker 1: I'm what is We are back from our break and
30:39
Speaker 1: now we're really really excited to introduce our special guest
30:42
Speaker 1: for today. Everybody, please welcome Jay dot Y Say hi,
30:49
Speaker 1: I'm Jay Jee. Thank you so much for being here today.
30:52
Speaker 1: I'm so excited. This is like I'm just going to
30:55
Speaker 1: be here. I've I've I've seen y'all just like blow
30:57
Speaker 1: up and blossom and also aesthetics are always on, which
31:00
Speaker 1: I'm a big fan of. But also like what ill
31:01
Speaker 1: are doing is so important, so like best of both
31:03
Speaker 1: of us, look good and doing good. You see you
31:06
Speaker 1: see our vision. It's very California, which I'm happy that
31:10
Speaker 1: you came back and live your truth from the East,
31:12
Speaker 1: like you came back grab all that knowledge. Cute because
31:15
Speaker 1: it's not actually over there. I'm glad you mentioned the
31:18
Speaker 1: East because that's where our origin story began, I mean
31:21
Speaker 1: our individual stories. I think our California origin stories. But
31:24
Speaker 1: the origin of this friendship, yeah, which is so funny.
31:27
Speaker 1: That is that is that is that we were here
31:30
Speaker 1: to like living parallel lives and then met on the
31:33
Speaker 1: East yes, like also doving down to like Polytechnic. Like
31:36
Speaker 1: in fact, we were like in the same geographic like
31:39
Speaker 1: Land Pasadena. What high school did you go to? Jay?
31:42
Speaker 1: So I'm going to boarding school in Connecticut, So I like,
31:45
Speaker 1: I like spend my time between l A and Connecticut.
31:48
Speaker 1: So you were literally living parallel lines, like literally living parallelized.
31:51
Speaker 1: And but we didn't even meet until college. And then
31:54
Speaker 1: we're like, oh, where you're gonna go to l A.
31:56
Speaker 1: And it to us like people said there from l A,
31:58
Speaker 1: and like we're lying, and so would we like we
32:01
Speaker 1: like from last ange, we like figured out that we
32:03
Speaker 1: literally the same area and I've been like living in
32:05
Speaker 1: the same cities before, and like it was it was
32:07
Speaker 1: it was special because like, yeah, people lie because people
32:11
Speaker 1: lied can like you know, l A culture and California
32:14
Speaker 1: culture is so like particular, like we are who we
32:17
Speaker 1: are and it's cool to like connect with other Californians
32:20
Speaker 1: outside and I like, oh my god, Tough, there's so
32:24
Speaker 1: much to talk about. So we went to toughs We
32:26
Speaker 1: went to Tough University. We graduated. It's been four years,
32:30
Speaker 1: it's been four years, four long years, for interesting years, years,
32:34
Speaker 1: for wild years. And we were talking about so like
32:37
Speaker 1: something that a lot of people don't know is like
32:39
Speaker 1: there are a number of pretty like active like Twitter accounts,
32:43
Speaker 1: Internet people, um so like myself malmuns u j and
32:48
Speaker 1: can you tell people what your your handles are online?
32:51
Speaker 1: So on Twitter and Instagram on day Black d e
32:53
Speaker 1: y b l x k um and then I also
32:56
Speaker 1: make a video art under Jazzmine, Giselle, jay Z and
32:59
Speaker 1: my in j Z e l l e um so
33:02
Speaker 1: you can just look up that one on Instagram. Yeah,
33:05
Speaker 1: but on Twitter day Black d u I b l
33:07
Speaker 1: X King talk a lot of ship. Yes, we both
33:10
Speaker 1: talk a lot, and some of our other friends from
33:13
Speaker 1: toughs that we were talking about like that maybe a
33:16
Speaker 1: lot of people might follow a bunch of these accounts
33:18
Speaker 1: and not know that we all want to college together.
33:20
Speaker 1: But like a hood queer jumping more frank is Amber
33:29
Speaker 1: speak speaks. But then this whole like like like squad
33:34
Speaker 1: like era of like like tell us people amstad slash
33:40
Speaker 1: sociology slash Latino Center slash Afrikana Center slash LGBT centers,
33:45
Speaker 1: an amalgamation of like we all to study where we
33:49
Speaker 1: couldn't get out of there. So we all like we
33:51
Speaker 1: called we had these professors that I think all of
33:54
Speaker 1: us took classes with, and I feel like a lot
33:56
Speaker 1: of our becoming thought makers and like internet either yes,
34:02
Speaker 1: is we're thought makers in every like spelling that you
34:05
Speaker 1: can think of every in all the spelling. So Professor Sharp,
34:11
Speaker 1: Christina Sharp, brilliant in the way to go buy it right,
34:15
Speaker 1: the way go by it, monster's intimacy. Um was Christina
34:21
Speaker 1: Sharp not the first tenured black woman professor in the
34:24
Speaker 1: English department. She was so like a giant giant in
34:28
Speaker 1: the field. And then Professor Wu, I never you never have,
34:34
Speaker 1: professor because I was a saylogy not in that American
34:37
Speaker 1: studies so raised in America. We didn't we're having we're
34:39
Speaker 1: having an installed right now. It was like like I'll
34:43
Speaker 1: think about the classes I took myself. No, but Professor Pennington,
34:50
Speaker 1: we took history of African American music or Professor Pennington,
34:54
Speaker 1: did you think queer pop? No? Oh ye, my ship?
34:58
Speaker 1: I heard, my ship, I heard. But but but it's funny
35:01
Speaker 1: is that I feel like this sort of threat between
35:03
Speaker 1: all of us is that like we all love culture
35:07
Speaker 1: but are not like like the same kind of like
35:09
Speaker 1: not not same kind of fans anything. And we are
35:11
Speaker 1: fans of things for sure, our fans and things, not
35:13
Speaker 1: like we're about being fans, but everything we like we don't,
35:16
Speaker 1: we don't just like we can't just like it all.
35:19
Speaker 1: The pleasure of like liking things is like wild complicated.
35:24
Speaker 1: You know. We we like we were very well trained.
35:29
Speaker 1: We were well trained. Honestly, we were well trained to
35:31
Speaker 1: look at everything with a critical eye and do that
35:34
Speaker 1: constant deconstructing and questioning like why do I like this?
35:38
Speaker 1: But also not in a way that makes ruins everything,
35:41
Speaker 1: because that's the thing that I feel like a lot
35:42
Speaker 1: of like I think I think a lot of like
35:43
Speaker 1: especially like young like like Peo people color Creepbouk who
35:47
Speaker 1: go to like college and like they learn all necessary things.
35:49
Speaker 1: They didn't like like let everything be bad and they
35:52
Speaker 1: don't actually do any true work or like actually enjoy things,
35:55
Speaker 1: and there's a lot of joy and happiness and everything
35:56
Speaker 1: everything feels like it's toxic and terrible and like, yeah,
35:59
Speaker 1: it is terrible, but why can't we enjoy things? You know?
36:03
Speaker 1: And I think that like that Naza goat there like
36:05
Speaker 1: really sort of pushed us to like navigate with what
36:07
Speaker 1: we got, but like a guilty pleasure and there's no
36:09
Speaker 1: guilt on what I enjoyed, right exactly. I feel like
36:12
Speaker 1: that happens when you're coming into consciousness, right or you're
36:14
Speaker 1: like on learning all this, all these systems, like everything
36:18
Speaker 1: is something like you realize, right, like there's there's so much,
36:20
Speaker 1: like you said, to deconstruct behind like the music and
36:23
Speaker 1: the TV we watch and all like whatever is popular.
36:26
Speaker 1: But then when you deconcerted so much, it's like then
36:29
Speaker 1: you can't enjoy it either, and then you will let
36:30
Speaker 1: other people enjoy it. So it's like I feel like
36:35
Speaker 1: that's like baby activism type stuff, and then you move
36:37
Speaker 1: beyond it and you grow and you see the nuances.
36:39
Speaker 1: At least that's how I feel about it. Or that's
36:41
Speaker 1: you've been my understanding, right, That's what the thing is
36:44
Speaker 1: is that like, yes, there are some of us who
36:46
Speaker 1: have like stayed in the academia and like or even
36:48
Speaker 1: gone to more like like uh, social work, like so
36:51
Speaker 1: social justice work and social work like in the field,
36:54
Speaker 1: and someone's just like taking that knowledge like like y'all
36:57
Speaker 1: are like and like doing it here and and and
36:59
Speaker 1: not like like sort of like decentralizing and like and
37:01
Speaker 1: like and like redistributing that knowledge of people you need
37:04
Speaker 1: who don't need to get all that debt and go
37:06
Speaker 1: to a school, they can just go on SoundCloud and
37:08
Speaker 1: get the knowledge. And so like that's what I like,
37:11
Speaker 1: I'm doing my art and my poetry is like that.
37:13
Speaker 1: It was cool and not happy that I learned it,
37:15
Speaker 1: but like y'all need to go and do all that
37:16
Speaker 1: ship to get this knowledge. And how do we I
37:19
Speaker 1: think I think the ways we each have like re
37:21
Speaker 1: tuned and like tuned our knowledge to our to our
37:24
Speaker 1: communities and do what we care about most has been
37:25
Speaker 1: like the best way to use all that. But I'm
37:28
Speaker 1: speaking of your poetry. Do you want to tell us
37:30
Speaker 1: a little bit, because you've you've published, you're published multiple
37:33
Speaker 1: times over, multiple times over, tell us about it, your worst,
37:38
Speaker 1: what I'm doing, Share with the voice, and share with
37:41
Speaker 1: the children, Share with the children. So I'm a black
37:44
Speaker 1: transfilm artist and filmmaker and writer and um music maker
37:49
Speaker 1: and it's now get h P play a song later.
37:51
Speaker 1: But yeah, so essentially, right after college, I started working
37:55
Speaker 1: at a nonprofit doing like education, non private work, and
37:58
Speaker 1: I thought that was the thing that I could care
38:00
Speaker 1: about it. It wasn't like many of us. We'll talk
38:04
Speaker 1: about that the nonprofit funnel the fund right anyways, and
38:08
Speaker 1: so and then that was the course hell, and so
38:11
Speaker 1: I had to stop, and I I was trying to
38:13
Speaker 1: organize ended at the same time. And like in organizing,
38:16
Speaker 1: I was like a beaut a by police and like
38:18
Speaker 1: having as in fighting, and then at work I wanted
38:20
Speaker 1: to die. So I was like, I'm going to stop
38:22
Speaker 1: all this. And these are things that really and truly
38:25
Speaker 1: and literally happened to you, like literally like physically, like
38:29
Speaker 1: like I was at a rally and like was caught
38:32
Speaker 1: in a police line and like it's a you know.
38:35
Speaker 1: And so I had like they can choose how I
38:36
Speaker 1: could do this work, you know. And so now I'm
38:39
Speaker 1: a full time artist. I was I was teaching youth
38:42
Speaker 1: poetry in Boston, but now I run a writing works
38:46
Speaker 1: online and live for Winter Tangerine magazine. Um and yeah,
38:50
Speaker 1: I said, I'm published, poet, published essayist. I've a column
38:55
Speaker 1: dropping in Poetry Foundation magazine to Monday really July and July. Yeah,
39:01
Speaker 1: how exciting? But so is this is this like a
39:04
Speaker 1: regular column? So I'm the featured columns for July very cool,
39:08
Speaker 1: but for essay sort of on the world culture sending
39:12
Speaker 1: around poet you're coming out? Is this an online Yes, yes,
39:16
Speaker 1: you'll have to send it to us so we can
39:17
Speaker 1: link it so we can put our listeners. Yes. Um.
39:20
Speaker 1: And then more recently I've started doing a lot more
39:22
Speaker 1: video and film work, um, doing just like a lot
39:25
Speaker 1: of like sort of like like elevating and deconstructing like
39:29
Speaker 1: sort of selfie work and self making and telling you
39:33
Speaker 1: about that, tell little more you know, you know, we
39:36
Speaker 1: love that, you know that you need That's all we
39:40
Speaker 1: needed that words. So my my next collection is coming
39:44
Speaker 1: out on Nightboat Books, and I think next next March. Um.
39:48
Speaker 1: It's called The Black Condition, featuring Narcissus, and so obviously
39:51
Speaker 1: take being Narcissus smith um and like really like delve
39:53
Speaker 1: into it and like it's sort of like you know,
39:55
Speaker 1: like the thornal ways that dismissed like oh someth's narcissist.
39:58
Speaker 1: But the actually like tragedy of it all was, uh,
40:00
Speaker 1: our sisters were never allowed to see themselves like lootly
40:02
Speaker 1: their whole life like praise, adored, gifted, told they were
40:05
Speaker 1: great and wonderful. But would never allowed to literally ever
40:08
Speaker 1: see themselves. So anything they received, they can never under
40:11
Speaker 1: truly understand why they were just told that they just
40:13
Speaker 1: deserved it up somebody, you know, being a gifted brown
40:16
Speaker 1: kid and struff through the world and whatever whatever whatever,
40:18
Speaker 1: get the parallels, so whatever. So when the sisters basically
40:23
Speaker 1: in the wood and this nymph echo basically gaslights him
40:27
Speaker 1: and drives him crazy when she reveals himself, he's like, no, bitch,
40:31
Speaker 1: I'm out, and so he runs away and this other
40:34
Speaker 1: demi god puts a river in his path and seeing
40:37
Speaker 1: just a glipse of his own face like made him
40:40
Speaker 1: stop and he dies because he can't actually see his face,
40:43
Speaker 1: but because he saw that glimmer he's trying to see
40:45
Speaker 1: He's never seen it before. So it's not that he's
40:47
Speaker 1: so obsessed with his own reflection. He literally just trying
40:49
Speaker 1: to see it for the first time ever. And see,
40:52
Speaker 1: that's the story that I know, is that he's obsessed
40:54
Speaker 1: with his own reflection. I never knew this, and so
40:57
Speaker 1: he dies trying to trying to see himself literally trying
41:01
Speaker 1: that way, right, So yeah, so so like getting into
41:06
Speaker 1: because as I know that I could be narcissistic and
41:09
Speaker 1: so I wanted to figure out like why why and
41:10
Speaker 1: soft because so it's sort of a parallel for me
41:14
Speaker 1: the beginning of my transition. So I was like, Okay,
41:16
Speaker 1: I need to figure out who this self is. I
41:19
Speaker 1: kind of I thought, I sort of like a ca
41:20
Speaker 1: Cattic glimpse. And so for me, it was like, how
41:22
Speaker 1: do I see this whole self from myself without dying? Here?
41:25
Speaker 1: How do I not die? Trying to find myself? And
41:28
Speaker 1: so thinking about like selfie work and like creating like
41:30
Speaker 1: digital selves and thinking about like distortion because I in
41:34
Speaker 1: my transition thinking about like distorting my body from how
41:37
Speaker 1: it is currently rendered, you know, And and distortion is
41:39
Speaker 1: not a negative thing but an empowering, empowering thing because
41:42
Speaker 1: it's sort of things can't be put back, you know
41:44
Speaker 1: what I mean, sort of you can't undo something that's
41:46
Speaker 1: been distorted in this way, which I really love. Um.
41:49
Speaker 1: So yeah, So like selfie work and like self and
41:51
Speaker 1: like trying to make self, trying trying to make a
41:54
Speaker 1: reflective self that makes sense to me has been like
41:56
Speaker 1: really important for my art. I absolutely love that. And
42:00
Speaker 1: thank you so much for bringing that story of Narcissus,
42:04
Speaker 1: because that like wow, that like is volumes, volumes, we're processed.
42:15
Speaker 1: I love I love it. I love that process. I
42:17
Speaker 1: love it. I'm excited. I love it. Right, I mean
42:20
Speaker 1: and even just like the act of taking a selfie right,
42:22
Speaker 1: And it's kind of like when you're when you're curating
42:24
Speaker 1: your Instagram or wherever you post. Right, it's like this
42:27
Speaker 1: idea of like not posting back to back selfies or
42:30
Speaker 1: too many selfies. Yeah, I not if it's my face
42:33
Speaker 1: and it's my page, why not? Why not? You know?
42:36
Speaker 1: But I mean, yeah, I'm very taking selfie. I'm like
42:40
Speaker 1: against not. I'm also really in self and shame because
42:43
Speaker 1: I can there was one like definite sexist, but also
42:45
Speaker 1: just like absolutely like people, I'm not like, I think
42:49
Speaker 1: that there has to be some need to see yourself right,
42:52
Speaker 1: and you know, people really and truly well, I would
42:55
Speaker 1: say straight men really and truly hate like the foum
42:58
Speaker 1: selfie culture, the outwardly and admittedly hate it told you
43:01
Speaker 1: about yesterday. No we I think we should talk about
43:03
Speaker 1: that later, okay, um, but I mean doing on that
43:06
Speaker 1: going on that. I hate it they hated because it's
43:08
Speaker 1: not from the perspective of the male gaze. It's completely
43:12
Speaker 1: like for yourself empowered and then I mean, obviously there
43:16
Speaker 1: are men that come onto the to the comments, but
43:19
Speaker 1: I know for myself, like whenever I post a selfie,
43:21
Speaker 1: it's a lot of my friends and the women and
43:23
Speaker 1: the films that I follow, like Praising Me right, which
43:25
Speaker 1: we talk about, and like our Goddess worship episode, you know,
43:28
Speaker 1: and it's like, because it's not for the male game.
43:30
Speaker 1: I have a question, Ja, so speaking of like journeys
43:33
Speaker 1: and distortion and selfies. So, and we've been on the
43:36
Speaker 1: internet all this time, right since before college, So what
43:39
Speaker 1: what role have selfies played for you, like college era
43:43
Speaker 1: j and today? Because I've been doing You're right, you've
43:45
Speaker 1: seen me do so I like, so I grew up
43:48
Speaker 1: my mom, my mom and grandma obvious sending photos of me.
43:50
Speaker 1: So I grewup in my house full of photos of myself.
43:52
Speaker 1: So it was like not weird. I'm very like even
43:55
Speaker 1: all my dysphoria, it is very private because like my
43:58
Speaker 1: external like sort of self that like you know, I
44:01
Speaker 1: was like I was always loved it, Like I didn't
44:03
Speaker 1: always get it, had had a lot of body issues
44:05
Speaker 1: or whatever, but like I've always had reflects to myself
44:07
Speaker 1: in my home or whatever. And so when I first
44:10
Speaker 1: went to the boarding school, obviously there was no siting
44:12
Speaker 1: me around them anywhere. And so that's when I begin
44:14
Speaker 1: the practice of just like I'm like, always had to
44:16
Speaker 1: phone with the camera, always had me in camera. Iways like,
44:18
Speaker 1: you know, just creating this photo doccultation for myself because
44:21
Speaker 1: I honestly like I didn't even realize it then, but
44:23
Speaker 1: I just did not. I didn't feel real I didn't
44:26
Speaker 1: I had seeing myself. I was like, oh no, you're
44:27
Speaker 1: a person like you you you do take up a
44:29
Speaker 1: physical space, you know, and like did you feel it
44:32
Speaker 1: like a disassociation before I had linked for this association,
44:37
Speaker 1: Like I would take selfies whenever I would feel like
44:39
Speaker 1: nothing got it to make like the actor that was like, okay,
44:42
Speaker 1: even you're here, like all that work you got you
44:45
Speaker 1: looking at you being here, you know, And so I
44:48
Speaker 1: didn't help the legs for that. But like every time
44:50
Speaker 1: I was down, as you know, I can go back,
44:51
Speaker 1: going back now and see when high school selfies are
44:54
Speaker 1: like all that ship, I was like, oh, bit, you
44:56
Speaker 1: needed you needed a friend, but you made it. You
44:58
Speaker 1: made you made it self to like a digital copy
45:01
Speaker 1: digital copy with myself. And but and also now like
45:03
Speaker 1: be able to look back and see all that, Like
45:05
Speaker 1: it's so helpful because I can really see, like how
45:09
Speaker 1: do college photos are like heartbreaking? I'm like, you're sad,
45:13
Speaker 1: you're blackout, like you're never stated like you know, smiling
45:16
Speaker 1: or not. I can just see. I can just know,
45:18
Speaker 1: you know. And so I'm happy that I haven't just
45:20
Speaker 1: to know how far I've come. Oh my god, those
45:22
Speaker 1: old college photos, the pain in our eyes, the pain,
45:27
Speaker 1: the pain in our even were together, like happy and happy.
45:30
Speaker 1: They were together in that moment. This is collective sadness,
45:33
Speaker 1: all of us. Just like that's real. That's the world's helpless. Yeah,
45:42
Speaker 1: I can definitely relate to like taking photos when like
45:45
Speaker 1: you're disassociating. Like last summer, I was like I was
45:48
Speaker 1: really depressed, and I was like going through all these transitions,
45:50
Speaker 1: and I would take photos of myself, but I would
45:52
Speaker 1: take like mirror pictures because for me, a lot of
45:54
Speaker 1: my disassociation came from like feeling separate from my body
45:58
Speaker 1: as a survivor. So I would have to take like
46:00
Speaker 1: not even just selfies, but like here's a mirror photo
46:02
Speaker 1: of my full body, and like that would make me
46:04
Speaker 1: feel connected, Like I would have to look at that
46:06
Speaker 1: photo like, Okay, I'm here, I'm a person, I'm present,
46:09
Speaker 1: I'm moving, I'm transitioning, like I'm going through these transitions
46:12
Speaker 1: in life, but like I'm right here. You know. There's
46:16
Speaker 1: when I was in Detroit, I had, I had a
46:19
Speaker 1: room to myself and like, moment's very kind, but left
46:23
Speaker 1: Alan a lot in the best way. Yeah, and you
46:25
Speaker 1: moved to Detroit right after college? No, no, no no, no,
46:27
Speaker 1: I lived in Boston for two whole years, two years,
46:29
Speaker 1: two years. Yeah, I moved. I just moved from Detroit
46:33
Speaker 1: back to California last summer. Yeah, but that recent elms
46:38
Speaker 1: the year. But when when I when when I was there,
46:42
Speaker 1: like I had this practice of like sitting staying in
46:46
Speaker 1: the mirror just saying you're alive and like and like
46:49
Speaker 1: and like I don't know how it sort of came
46:50
Speaker 1: to me, but I just like just like I remember
46:52
Speaker 1: like feeling like nothing and happened, and we were just
46:54
Speaker 1: saying it until it felt like something. Yeah, and that
46:57
Speaker 1: it came to practice of that I would just do
46:58
Speaker 1: like all the time time and and me and even
47:01
Speaker 1: now whever I feel like posted that I'll descend the
47:03
Speaker 1: mirror like light on and to say, like you're alive,
47:06
Speaker 1: You're like just like it's kind of like a like
47:08
Speaker 1: a like a mantra almost, but it's sort of like
47:10
Speaker 1: a programming. I found program programming myself to be to
47:14
Speaker 1: hear it. And yeah, almost like muscle memory, because your
47:16
Speaker 1: brain is that muscle, right, yeah, exactly, exactly ex no,
47:21
Speaker 1: And I'm like, okay, So it kind of reminds me
47:23
Speaker 1: of like the practice of like talking to oneself as well,
47:26
Speaker 1: like almost how like taking a selfie is like talking
47:29
Speaker 1: with yourself or like speaking that way is like talking
47:32
Speaker 1: to yourself, And it's just like I think instead of
47:36
Speaker 1: prayer sometimes like those types of things can bring us
47:39
Speaker 1: comfort and remind us of like our purpose and why
47:42
Speaker 1: we're here. And yeah, I talk to myself all the time,
47:45
Speaker 1: so do I all the time. I'm like pull like interviews,
47:48
Speaker 1: like I play our conversations with people in my real
47:50
Speaker 1: life before I have to have them, right, I do
47:52
Speaker 1: that to you. Yeah, sometimes you need it's important. It's important.
47:56
Speaker 1: And the best is when like you're right where you've
47:58
Speaker 1: already prepared yourself and saving you're like I know you
48:00
Speaker 1: were going to got you. I gotta right, that's so
48:05
Speaker 1: do you want to remind us? Um, where can people
48:08
Speaker 1: like look at find your poetry and your books and
48:10
Speaker 1: your work Jay dot dot net. You can get everything
48:13
Speaker 1: jay dot dot net A Y Y D O D D.
48:17
Speaker 1: If you go there, you'll find everything. You'll find poem,
48:20
Speaker 1: you'll find my music, you'll find my film essays. Yeah, everything,
48:25
Speaker 1: We'll be right there. It's it's one one stop shot
48:27
Speaker 1: for all you want from me. Perfect, perfect, And do
48:30
Speaker 1: you have any like I know you were touring, Um,
48:32
Speaker 1: there was a ProDance from when you were touring? What
48:34
Speaker 1: was touring? Yeah? What was what was tour life? Like?
48:37
Speaker 1: What was that like? It was fun? It was fun? Uh,
48:41
Speaker 1: it was complicated. It was so easy things. So we
48:43
Speaker 1: went to went through like the Southwest, so we went
48:46
Speaker 1: from like l A down to Arizona and New Mexico.
48:50
Speaker 1: And I'm trying to move to Mexico because like ghost
48:52
Speaker 1: the aliens on my ship and I'm not like on
48:53
Speaker 1: the black people there and they were great, So I'm
48:55
Speaker 1: like trying to get there in my life. No, no,
48:58
Speaker 1: no truth or consequences. It's a very small town. That's
49:01
Speaker 1: the name of the town in Mexico. Yes, yes, sounds
49:05
Speaker 1: like a band that's a whole other story. On tour,
49:10
Speaker 1: like it was wild, like like it's not someone so
49:15
Speaker 1: different than California, but there's a certain like uh like
49:20
Speaker 1: less pretense in this way, you know. Um, and I
49:25
Speaker 1: was sort of surprised how queer parts of it were,
49:27
Speaker 1: but it's it was still very like like white and
49:30
Speaker 1: light brown queer. It wasn't like you know, it wasn't
49:33
Speaker 1: on the black transforms out there and getting in life.
49:35
Speaker 1: So that was sort of weird, like performing people performing
49:37
Speaker 1: for a majority people who are not people who are
49:39
Speaker 1: right who create my work for um, and sort of
49:42
Speaker 1: feeling like a token like within the tour, that was
49:45
Speaker 1: something that was hard to deal with. But the actual
49:47
Speaker 1: like being out and like performing live and like sharing
49:49
Speaker 1: spaces always wanted that was cool, you know because you
49:51
Speaker 1: were on tour with a group. Yeah. Yeah, so it
49:53
Speaker 1: was this group called Sisters Spit. Oh my god, okay, yes,
49:59
Speaker 1: let's talk about it. Yeah yeah, so I was like,
50:02
Speaker 1: yeah I was on this year. Um and uh, one
50:06
Speaker 1: thing is it was starting for like white bunch lesbians
50:09
Speaker 1: to go on our band and like white white but
50:11
Speaker 1: especially been saying got in Mexico and Arizona, right, sure,
50:15
Speaker 1: just fine, just fine, And and and it even like
50:18
Speaker 1: so like like like says people can like you know
50:22
Speaker 1: what I mean. And so this thing where we're just
50:24
Speaker 1: like it was sort of hard to like hold other
50:26
Speaker 1: people's like kind of like fake anxieties. We're not fake,
50:29
Speaker 1: but I'm like, y'all performing anxiety because you know, this
50:31
Speaker 1: is ANXIO situation, but the person who's most most endangered
50:34
Speaker 1: is me, and I'm here and I'm level, so y'all stuff,
50:37
Speaker 1: So hard to like that's having to maintain all these
50:40
Speaker 1: people when I was like, you know what, Jamal Jamal
50:42
Speaker 1: lewis fat them on. Yeah, so Jamal along to people
50:47
Speaker 1: come tour um and and so like it was always
50:50
Speaker 1: so it was us and then all these other like
50:53
Speaker 1: small mostly sis like you know, yeah, and so there's
50:57
Speaker 1: a little bit of like a safety gap in sort
50:59
Speaker 1: of like a k air community gap, solidarity solidarity gap
51:02
Speaker 1: that happens, but then like sort of reflecting on what
51:06
Speaker 1: is created for of course of course not and so
51:08
Speaker 1: and so I'm happy that I got that space, but
51:11
Speaker 1: it definitely not like safe or like good for my
51:14
Speaker 1: body casually. And I'm happy that it was like that
51:17
Speaker 1: we got through it, but it definitely was like, oh,
51:19
Speaker 1: like yellow is not safe for everyone. Bring there is
51:23
Speaker 1: that gap right where it's like, if I'm by myself,
51:27
Speaker 1: I faced my own particular violences, right, But then now
51:31
Speaker 1: if you and I are walking down the street, I
51:33
Speaker 1: am probably going to be the one to like get
51:36
Speaker 1: in between or assert my privileges in that moment, especially
51:41
Speaker 1: if you're in my community, which is predominantly non black
51:45
Speaker 1: and not many trans people at all and like very religious,
51:48
Speaker 1: right right, but is the thing like it all depends
51:51
Speaker 1: on the space and like stars and that's fine, and
51:55
Speaker 1: that's fine, but like if y'all are white passing says passing,
51:59
Speaker 1: straight passing, I don't get that luxury ever right in
52:03
Speaker 1: any space, you know, like and maybe even gender, but
52:05
Speaker 1: I'm can still something, I'm a little with some something
52:07
Speaker 1: and that's something something something something, you know what I mean.
52:09
Speaker 1: It's never like an assuming that oh they're probably just fine,
52:11
Speaker 1: never and so and so I was curious to me
52:15
Speaker 1: even like when sort of like queer spaces don't unpack
52:18
Speaker 1: the differences within those spaces, I mean, have it happens
52:22
Speaker 1: across POC general, especially in these creer spaces, like they
52:25
Speaker 1: really sort of like get away with like casual anti
52:30
Speaker 1: like black anti black in consideration, I think consideration and
52:34
Speaker 1: like like transphobic in consideration. It's not like it's definitely
52:37
Speaker 1: not intentional or like malicious and so you can't call
52:40
Speaker 1: him on it and what well, yeah, but you're not
52:42
Speaker 1: meaning to will still lead me dead, you know what
52:43
Speaker 1: I mean, You're not meaning to still lead me. Like
52:46
Speaker 1: remember we stopped to Tuside and there's like white it's
52:49
Speaker 1: like sort of white passing like trans mass person on
52:53
Speaker 1: the tour um and we're into something. I mean, we're
52:55
Speaker 1: on like a stop going some where people are going
52:57
Speaker 1: to get groceries or whatever. And I just went to
53:00
Speaker 1: a two walk block, like I go over to to
53:02
Speaker 1: walk for like two blocks to have a cigarette whatever.
53:05
Speaker 1: Every single block, someone in the car, someone like some
53:08
Speaker 1: of something to say, whatever, something, something all violent, all terrible,
53:13
Speaker 1: And I was just like and I've been't do something
53:15
Speaker 1: before like I'd say that, like I was like this
53:17
Speaker 1: whatever out. I mean, I always think that I'm not
53:21
Speaker 1: even that fan, but like that's not even that's start
53:23
Speaker 1: feeding like field. But you know what I mean, I
53:25
Speaker 1: thought it was fine or whatever that means, you know,
53:27
Speaker 1: what I mean, we try and rationalized to protect right
53:31
Speaker 1: felt all that ship. So I was and I just
53:34
Speaker 1: like got a whole huspanic attack and then came back
53:36
Speaker 1: and then my like white passing mask transfer and is
53:39
Speaker 1: making out with some way bits oh fucking outside of
53:42
Speaker 1: the building on this on the same you can make
53:45
Speaker 1: out with somebody on I can't walk down, got it right?
53:48
Speaker 1: And there's the there's the there's don't know what I mean,
53:50
Speaker 1: it's like that's like a you know, like and like
53:52
Speaker 1: and they're a fire person. We were home, is like
53:53
Speaker 1: it was not about them, say, but that should have
53:55
Speaker 1: showed me that like this space is okay for certain
53:57
Speaker 1: people and not others. And the fact that it wasn't
53:59
Speaker 1: like talked about or like or like whatever was brought
54:02
Speaker 1: episode of just like oh we're just bad, no y'all,
54:04
Speaker 1: y'all brought me here. You know. The thing that we
54:07
Speaker 1: talked about one of our we've done two episodes on
54:10
Speaker 1: the podcast on what we call fem defense, So just
54:12
Speaker 1: safety planning in general, whether that's street harassment, um, what
54:16
Speaker 1: have you so for you when you think of your
54:20
Speaker 1: day to day and safety planning or like as far
54:24
Speaker 1: as people who are hanging out with you and safety
54:26
Speaker 1: planning for you. What would that look like like? What
54:28
Speaker 1: would that film defense conversation look like for you? So
54:32
Speaker 1: this is complicated obviously because like my body is to
54:35
Speaker 1: my body, I'm six five, I'm black, I'm not like,
54:39
Speaker 1: I'm not as oft as I want to imagine, you know,
54:42
Speaker 1: in terms of how outside will read me. Sure, and
54:45
Speaker 1: so like this is thing where I've been with like
54:47
Speaker 1: transfer friends and trans women friends who are like much
54:50
Speaker 1: less palpable than me. And it's funny how like in
54:53
Speaker 1: a cup setting, how quickly I become like a buoyded them.
54:57
Speaker 1: How do you deal with that having to be like,
54:59
Speaker 1: oh interesting, Oh you're you're literally using me as a
55:02
Speaker 1: physical block aide, like because of your size, because because
55:05
Speaker 1: of my size, the bodyguards. I know, I know that,
55:08
Speaker 1: it's not I know that it's not like I don't
55:09
Speaker 1: see as a woman. It's that I'm just now because
55:12
Speaker 1: of my body, I like I'm always going to I'm
55:14
Speaker 1: physically like the first line of defense, and so like
55:18
Speaker 1: something about that instead of the one needing defending right right,
55:21
Speaker 1: And I don't even like so I don't even have
55:23
Speaker 1: to think about that dichotomy so actively, because like I
55:25
Speaker 1: would defend just because I like, it's just like words.
55:28
Speaker 1: I look at my mom creat a gun and so
55:30
Speaker 1: I'm like, do you know, like I come from a
55:32
Speaker 1: line of FIM dug so like FIM arrest is not
55:34
Speaker 1: hard for me to hold onto, but like when I'm
55:36
Speaker 1: being used without being told on being used to be
55:38
Speaker 1: uh this thing and so for me, it's just like
55:41
Speaker 1: I think it's really like a in the spot, like
55:45
Speaker 1: if you were something's happening to you and I know
55:47
Speaker 1: my body will will be used. I'm gonna use it.
55:49
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna I'm not gonna need to be dowdated.
55:51
Speaker 1: Oh no, this been bitch will kill you. And this
55:53
Speaker 1: is five body, you know what I mean. It's not
55:55
Speaker 1: something about that, but I do wish sort of like
55:59
Speaker 1: in like sort of a casual ways that like uh
56:03
Speaker 1: women and fims sort of like engaged big and tall
56:06
Speaker 1: women with a little bit more like humanity and like
56:10
Speaker 1: and like and just like and like. But it's almost
56:13
Speaker 1: like like a body leguas because and even like how
56:14
Speaker 1: people always speak to me. But it's like, you know,
56:16
Speaker 1: you're literally physically treating me like I'm your bodyguard, Like
56:18
Speaker 1: I'm you're like guard dog, I'm not that much. I
56:22
Speaker 1: was asked to be. You've asked me to be. So
56:24
Speaker 1: how do we get here? You know what I mean? Um?
56:26
Speaker 1: And so it's it's like I think, like I think,
56:30
Speaker 1: knowing what people need, knowing what like like like checking in,
56:34
Speaker 1: like in a space. If you feel like how you
56:35
Speaker 1: hop off with what you need to get out? Are
56:38
Speaker 1: you going to fight? You're not a fight to get out.
56:40
Speaker 1: If you want to fight, then you can like let
56:41
Speaker 1: it play you out. You know what? The communication communication
56:45
Speaker 1: I said, it's not about being used in that way.
56:47
Speaker 1: It's about not being student, not choosing to It's not
56:51
Speaker 1: not not not being able to choose my body to
56:53
Speaker 1: use it, to use it as I want to. Yeah,
56:56
Speaker 1: you're like a ton of me and your agency is
56:57
Speaker 1: lost in those moments, right right, right right, Oh my gosh.
57:01
Speaker 1: There's levels upon levels up levels un levels send degrees
57:05
Speaker 1: to other degrees. Yeah, and it's not cutting drivers wise,
57:08
Speaker 1: like it's not like should be better, it's like no, no,
57:10
Speaker 1: we have to just like in communication in those situations,
57:13
Speaker 1: how to communicate will keep us all the safer and
57:15
Speaker 1: like long term feeling bad about how to navigate it,
57:18
Speaker 1: and life is long and there are many days in
57:21
Speaker 1: the week and they just keep coming. So it's it's
57:23
Speaker 1: going to end up being like a situational like situation
57:25
Speaker 1: by situation, we're making assessments and talking to each other.
57:30
Speaker 1: So you did mention that you make music. We're kind
57:35
Speaker 1: of coming towards the end of this interview at this point,
57:38
Speaker 1: and we want to make sure that you plug everything
57:41
Speaker 1: that you know. You would like our listeners to check
57:43
Speaker 1: out your work, your projects, your music, where to find
57:47
Speaker 1: it and if you can introduce this song this is
57:49
Speaker 1: Jay song? Sure? Okay, yeah, so, um, you should definitely
57:52
Speaker 1: go on our website. I'm more so like people just
57:55
Speaker 1: to read and follow me and then send me money
57:58
Speaker 1: if you If you go on my website, you can
57:59
Speaker 1: find all my don't the links, but on PayPal, Vinmo,
58:03
Speaker 1: and cash me. It's j dot my name j A
58:06
Speaker 1: Y Y d O D D on all of them
58:07
Speaker 1: all one word. Um. But yeah, go on my website.
58:10
Speaker 1: Check out my poem, check out my essays. Uh, and
58:13
Speaker 1: also you can check out my new my new work.
58:15
Speaker 1: I released it. I released it like a rap album
58:18
Speaker 1: like three years ago. I remember, I remember, And have
58:22
Speaker 1: you done anything really? Yes? So I haven't done anything
58:25
Speaker 1: musical publicly since then. Yeah, what was it called Goon? Yes? Yes,
58:34
Speaker 1: yes you did, Yes you did, Yes you did, you did?
58:36
Speaker 1: You did? Um but oh my god, Googen was a
58:38
Speaker 1: whole error from me anyways, and era moment Googon era
58:43
Speaker 1: lasted basically Utili Goon was my last bour era like
58:46
Speaker 1: Goon and then like Death of Boyhood and then now
58:49
Speaker 1: and then now and here we are, here we are
58:51
Speaker 1: and here we are. But yeah, so I but even
58:54
Speaker 1: that production was that, that was all just wrapping. I
58:56
Speaker 1: do any any of the production on that. So this
58:58
Speaker 1: is like a whole new venture. It's no words, it's
59:01
Speaker 1: all it's all production, instrumental soundscape. But yeah, but this
59:06
Speaker 1: album is Constellations Humanity and it's based on the soundtrack
59:10
Speaker 1: to my first film, but also some other cool songs.
59:12
Speaker 1: But this one song is called Andre Leon Tally and
59:14
Speaker 1: it's named after the like black fashion god. But the
59:17
Speaker 1: thing is he's like dying poor and alone, really really
59:21
Speaker 1: really really tragic, like profile come out recently being like yeah,
59:26
Speaker 1: like animator online things that she wants to like me
59:28
Speaker 1: and like all these people whatever, and I have to
59:30
Speaker 1: sort of this feeling of like he was just at
59:32
Speaker 1: the met again right right, no, right right, and so
59:37
Speaker 1: but the thing is also like Tally like has like
59:40
Speaker 1: never demanded blackness in this way of his faces that
59:43
Speaker 1: he was in crafting, and I think that was why
59:45
Speaker 1: he got so far in many ways, and he sort
59:47
Speaker 1: of reflects about sometimes, especially in this profile. But he
59:50
Speaker 1: also is a very large black man, So I was
59:52
Speaker 1: very like bodily connection to him, but also worry about
59:54
Speaker 1: like ascent in like non black worlds and like the
59:58
Speaker 1: particial loan and how to avoid that. Okay, because I'm
1:00:01
Speaker 1: about about dying broke, like what's money, but I do
1:00:04
Speaker 1: worry about dying like alone and without a thought like
1:00:06
Speaker 1: a black community loving me. So this song is like
1:00:09
Speaker 1: both in homage and like a thought, but it's not
1:00:12
Speaker 1: like I'm on Telly, Okay, thank you so much for
1:00:16
Speaker 1: you In the background of that's of that Wow, J
1:00:19
Speaker 1: you're so with Jay and I. We were talking. We
1:00:23
Speaker 1: haven't seen each other since graduation. It's been for years,
1:00:27
Speaker 1: you know, just doing our thing and living our lives.
1:00:29
Speaker 1: And when we saw each other right now on the street,
1:00:31
Speaker 1: it's well, no time has a labs when it's time,
1:00:34
Speaker 1: when it's time. Anyways, we're back we're back at it.
1:00:37
Speaker 1: Thank you so much Jay for being here. You are
1:00:39
Speaker 1: truly brilliant, Like whenever you're in the area and you
1:00:43
Speaker 1: want to come on the show, you are more than
1:00:45
Speaker 1: This has been such a fun episode to like come back,
1:00:49
Speaker 1: you know, after our break. I'm like, truly, truly you
1:00:53
Speaker 1: came on the show. I'm so happy y'all doing such
1:00:56
Speaker 1: important things like I love you and I have about
1:00:59
Speaker 1: I know y'all in this way, I don't feel like
1:01:01
Speaker 1: like fan the quiet, but belated to be hearing to
1:01:07
Speaker 1: help y'all and help you' all like support you all
1:01:09
Speaker 1: this time. Yeah, I love you, Thank you, thank you,
1:01:13
Speaker 1: Thank you once again for tuning in to Another Look Radio. Yes,
1:01:17
Speaker 1: as always, you can follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook
1:01:20
Speaker 1: at Look at That Radio. Um, we have new merch
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Speaker 1: we have our pins, so if you want to place
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Speaker 1: an order, you can do that via Venmo And if
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Speaker 1: you feel so inclined to do so, please leave us
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Speaker 1: a review on Apple Podcast. We're at like close to
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Speaker 1: two hundred reviews, two hundred stars. Exciting. Please help us
1:01:40
Speaker 1: get get us to two hundred. Yes, yes, thank you,
1:01:43
Speaker 1: love you, love you all.