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Fear Is Present But Not In Charge · Divas That Care Network

0:00
SPEAKER_00: It's Divas the Care Radio.
0:02
SPEAKER_00: Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change.
0:06
SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone.
0:13
SPEAKER_00: This is a global movement for women by women engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations.
0:20
SPEAKER_00: To find out more about the movement, visit divas that care.com after the show.
0:26
SPEAKER_00: Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
0:31
SPEAKER_02: Welcome back to Confidence in Bloom, where we explore what it really means to grow through the seasons of change, courage, and becoming.
0:39
SPEAKER_02: Today's conversation is based on our theme of victory over fear, and it's about what happens when fear is present but no longer in charge.
0:48
SPEAKER_02: Because fear has a way of sounding like truth, it can convince us to stay small, stay safe, and stay silent.
0:54
SPEAKER_02: But underneath that, there's often something deeper calling us forward, something rooted in purpose, alignment, and growth.
1:02
SPEAKER_02: My guest today, Sylvia Danieli, knows her journey knows this journey very well.
1:08
SPEAKER_02: After helping build and operate a successful family business, Sylvia made a powerful shift away from the traditional corporate path and into something more heart-led and community-based.
1:18
SPEAKER_02: Through Bloom Within Wellness, she now creates spaces for reflection, connection, and healing, helping people navigate life transitions with more intention, care, and presence.
1:29
SPEAKER_02: This conversation is about what it looks like to move through fear, not by waiting for it to disappear, but by choosing to move anyway.
1:43
SPEAKER_02: Thank you for having me.
1:44
SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited to be here.
1:46
SPEAKER_02: Of course, of course.
1:47
SPEAKER_02: So let's start with um sort of your background and your experience.
1:54
SPEAKER_02: You've experienced both uh like a traditional business environment, and now you've sort of transitioned into a community-centered wellness space.
2:04
SPEAKER_02: I want to know what fears show up for you or showed up for you during that transition, or if you're still kind of, you know, navigating them.
2:13
SPEAKER_01: So I'll just clarify, I was in a uh traditional business environment part-time and I was a stay-at-home mom at the same time.
2:20
SPEAKER_01: Um, but yes, I I still am navigating some of the fears, but one of my biggest fears when I transitioned into the community business environment would have been like being taken seriously.
2:36
SPEAKER_01: So it was a hard thing to like all of a sudden want to do this work and moving from a stay-at-home and a business environment as well.
2:45
SPEAKER_01: You know, there's roles and there's structures, expectations, and you know, there's certain ways you have to prove yourself in those kinds of environments.
2:54
SPEAKER_01: Here, um, it felt much more personal.
2:57
SPEAKER_01: And I wasn't just offering a service anymore.
3:00
SPEAKER_01: I was literally putting my heart and my story and my purpose out there.
3:04
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and that's and that, you know, it's being seen, right?
3:09
SPEAKER_02: And you're you're sort of pulling, you're you're almost pulling the clothes off the the shelf, right?
3:15
SPEAKER_02: Like you're kind of exposing yourself, is the word I guess I'm looking for.
3:19
SPEAKER_02: You're exposing yourself to something new, right?
3:22
SPEAKER_02: You don't know how it's gonna be received, you don't know, and and I mean, judgment isn't normal, right?
3:28
SPEAKER_02: We all we all fear that judgment to some degree, and now you're like, you know, you're exposing your naked self because you you have to talk about what you've been through, right?
3:39
SPEAKER_02: What you're gonna guide your your potential clients through, but what you have to guide them in a way that they feel safe and you know you know the pathway to take.
3:51
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
3:52
SPEAKER_01: And you know what?
3:53
SPEAKER_01: I uh the more I do it, the more confident I am getting in it.
3:58
SPEAKER_01: Um, but I do know that like when you're investing into something that is just like your soul work, I call it.
4:05
SPEAKER_01: Um, it's your time, your energy, and you're missing money into something that matters so deeply.
4:10
SPEAKER_01: And you're right about the visibility, sharing my voice, I mean, hosting events, bringing you know, women together, um, and saying this is what I believe in is really vulnerable.
4:22
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but I am super excited about it.
4:26
SPEAKER_02: I know, and I can feel that when I talk with you because when you know you're doing the right thing, you're you're you're helping other women grow into who they want to be, right?
4:36
SPEAKER_02: Who and who they true well, I'm uh it's who they want to be, but it's more of like an expansion of who they already are, right?
4:44
SPEAKER_01: Christina, I can't even tell you.
4:45
SPEAKER_01: I went, I did my retreat at uh the mountain Palmoray Mountain Canonascus Lodge.
4:51
SPEAKER_01: Uh backwards, sorry.
4:52
SPEAKER_01: But uh anyway, uh I did my retreat, and there was one woman there who came.
4:57
SPEAKER_01: Uh, she's uh a housewife, has um a company with her husband, hardworking, you know, took care of the kids, kids are grown, and she's never been exposed to anything like this.
5:08
SPEAKER_01: So at the end of the retreat, after she said thank you, probably over 30 times, but at the end of the retreat, she was almost in tears.
5:16
SPEAKER_01: And she was like, I now know I can be me and I can work for myself at the same time.
5:24
SPEAKER_01: And I think the fact that her children were leaving the home, it was making her nervous because when you're used to that, right?
5:32
SPEAKER_01: And you're working from home and working with your husband, that's your environment, right?
5:37
SPEAKER_01: So now she was so excited.
5:39
SPEAKER_01: I can't wait to host the testimonial.
5:42
SPEAKER_01: She really transitioned that weekend.
5:45
SPEAKER_01: Um, so when you say that about changing and about um bringing women together and making a difference, I knew after my first retreat, which was Milong Weekend, that I was definitely on the right path.
6:00
SPEAKER_02: I loved that.
6:00
SPEAKER_02: I absolutely love that.
6:01
SPEAKER_02: And I remember, so I remember when for me it happens kind of soon.
6:07
SPEAKER_02: Like my kids were not fully grown, right?
6:09
SPEAKER_02: But I had my oldest, the twins were 16 when they got their driver's license.
6:13
SPEAKER_02: And my youngest started walking to school all at the same time, right?
6:18
SPEAKER_02: And I was like, so what do I do now?
6:21
SPEAKER_02: Right?
6:22
SPEAKER_02: Like I really felt lost.
6:23
SPEAKER_02: Like my main concern, my main, my biggest priority was them all day, every day.
6:30
SPEAKER_02: And now all of a sudden, a simple thing, like I don't have to drive them to school anymore.
6:36
SPEAKER_02: It like it took everything from me.
6:38
SPEAKER_02: And I I remember sitting in my garage door watching them all leave, right?
6:42
SPEAKER_02: And I'm thinking, what now?
6:45
SPEAKER_02: What like who am I now?
6:47
SPEAKER_02: Like I have no purpose.
6:48
SPEAKER_02: And they were still, I mean, I I in my stories I say that they were grown, but really they were still like kids, right?
6:58
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, but they have that freedom of taking the car, right?
7:01
SPEAKER_02: And walking.
7:02
SPEAKER_02: Like I'm like, oh my gosh, I don't know what to do with myself anymore.
7:05
SPEAKER_02: So I understand and I can relate with that lady who is now like, you know, I can do what I want to do.
7:12
SPEAKER_02: It took me a few years, you know.
7:14
SPEAKER_02: I did slip into a little bit of a depression.
7:17
SPEAKER_02: And of course, I went into hiding because when you're depressed, you don't know how to deal with, you know, all the things.
7:23
SPEAKER_02: But you know, the truth is when when the light comes on, like this lady at your retreat, she realized that there is more for me.
7:32
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely, and she realized there's a whole community that's there to support and need, right?
7:38
SPEAKER_01: Yes, and she was so excited.
7:40
SPEAKER_01: I can't even tell you.
7:41
SPEAKER_01: And I just kept saying her stop saying thank you, because I this is what I wanted, and I thank you for coming and trusting me to provide this for you.
7:51
SPEAKER_01: And she's a good friend of mine, uh now, especially more than ever.
7:56
SPEAKER_01: But I was just so happy when I seen that transition.
7:59
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, and that's that's where the glory is, right?
8:01
SPEAKER_02: Is when you can see your client coming in one way and leaving another way, but in that other way is like like a golden star, right?
8:10
SPEAKER_02: Like she's bright and happy and kind of floating.
8:13
SPEAKER_02: I remember the first um styling client I had, you know, she was not very excited to go shopping with me, right?
8:21
SPEAKER_02: You know, she was plus size, so she knew her, you know, her limitations, right?
8:26
SPEAKER_02: She had set this boundary of I'm not gonna be able to buy too many clothes.
8:30
SPEAKER_02: And when I dropped her off, because I ended up driving her, but when I dropped her off at her house, and when she got out of the car, she had a little bit of a dance in her step walking into the house.
8:40
SPEAKER_02: And I, you know, that's why I'm doing what I do, right?
8:43
SPEAKER_02: That's the feeling I had in me because I thought, that's that I don't care that, you know, she she's not just wearing the great clothes, but she feels good in the clothes.
8:53
SPEAKER_02: She feels good in her skin, and that's what I was aiming for, right?
8:57
SPEAKER_02: I yeah, I can totally relate with what you're saying because of that.
9:01
SPEAKER_02: I know that feeling of it's not a matter of, you know, oh, I did a good job.
9:05
SPEAKER_02: I mean, yes, I did do a good job, but more importantly, she felt she felt like herself.
9:11
SPEAKER_02: She felt like she could carry on and feel good about it.
9:15
SPEAKER_02: So that's yeah, yeah.
9:17
SPEAKER_01: And getting into a rhythm that she never knew she had before was what what was important to me too, is because we're evolving and that's the age we're at, and we're going through these times.
9:29
SPEAKER_01: And I know that I use midlife all the time, the word midlife, but you know what it is.
9:33
SPEAKER_01: It's midlife, and lots of things are happening in our families.
9:36
SPEAKER_01: And when you realize you have now evolved into something else, and you can take different approaches to things and try different things, I think it opens up your world more, but you can still have what you've created.
9:51
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
9:52
SPEAKER_02: And you're sharing it with the world, right?
9:54
SPEAKER_02: What you're learning and what you're learning like about yourself and about the other women around you.
9:58
SPEAKER_02: You're sharing that with your girls.
10:00
SPEAKER_02: Like you have two daughters, you're sharing it with your girlfriends, you're sharing it with your, you know, your female, you know, people around you.
10:08
SPEAKER_02: And you know, when when you share, they learn.
10:11
SPEAKER_02: When they learn, they share, right?
10:13
SPEAKER_02: Like that's and then we're gonna create a better world, right?
10:16
SPEAKER_02: By that, right?
10:17
SPEAKER_02: Because we can only change the world one person at a time, and that one person starts with you, right?
10:22
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
10:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, absolutely love it.
10:25
SPEAKER_02: So tell me, was there a defining moment where you realized you couldn't keep choosing that comfort over that alignment anymore?
10:34
SPEAKER_01: 100%.
10:35
SPEAKER_01: So uh how it all started, I'll give you the backstory quickly.
10:39
SPEAKER_01: How it all started was um I had lost my mom.
10:43
SPEAKER_01: I had uh had a partial hysterectomy prior to that, so my hormones were dropping quickly, I would say.
10:53
SPEAKER_01: Um, and everything kind of came at once.
10:55
SPEAKER_01: So it was my perimenopause, it was my grief, and it was my nervous system that completely shut down.
11:03
SPEAKER_01: So any ra any like logical thinking wasn't there for me.
11:08
SPEAKER_01: Um, I I call it still to this day.
11:10
SPEAKER_01: I had a mental illness, it felt like like, and I I very well could have at the time.
11:15
SPEAKER_01: Um, and I wasn't reasoning with anything, I wasn't eating, I wasn't sleeping.
11:20
SPEAKER_01: I I was so tired of worrying about my health anxiety that something was wrong and I'm not gonna be here for my kids.
11:28
SPEAKER_01: So all I kept saying is, oh, I would die for my kids, I would die for my kids, I would give my life for my kids.
11:33
SPEAKER_01: And then my husband one day said to me, You keep saying that you would die for them, but would you get healthy and actually live life for them?
11:43
SPEAKER_02: Whoa.
11:44
SPEAKER_01: And I was like, Whoa, whoa, exactly what I said.
11:48
SPEAKER_01: I was like, don't put that kind of pressure on me.
11:53
SPEAKER_01: That's what did it, and I said to myself, okay, um, I'm curious.
11:59
SPEAKER_01: I'm I am so curious all the time.
12:01
SPEAKER_01: This is one good thing about me.
12:03
SPEAKER_01: I will search for an answer anywhere.
12:06
SPEAKER_01: You give it to me, you you hide it in an alley, I'll find it.
12:09
SPEAKER_01: Like I will do it, I will try.
12:12
SPEAKER_01: And that's what I started doing more of.
12:15
SPEAKER_01: And actually putting myself first and resting was the most important thing.
12:22
SPEAKER_01: And that's what that's when the transition started to actually happen.
12:26
SPEAKER_01: Because you can't, you can't heal when you are in fight and flight mode all the time.
12:32
SPEAKER_02: No, no, you cannot.
12:34
SPEAKER_02: So I'm just thinking, like, you know, it's funny how okay, so I was this I'm the same, right?
12:40
SPEAKER_02: I would do anything for my kids, I would die for my kids, right?
12:44
SPEAKER_02: But that question, well, would you would you become healthy for your kids?
12:48
SPEAKER_02: That's a whole new perspective, right?
12:50
SPEAKER_02: That's like, whoa, okay, now I have to put on different boots, right?
12:57
SPEAKER_01: Different lenses, different lenses, even how I view it, how I view my health.
13:02
SPEAKER_01: And that really hit me deeply because I realized I had spent so much of my time um prior to not feeling well, just you know, helping with my mom and and doing, you know, doing stuff a mothers do.
13:15
SPEAKER_01: I'm I'm no different than any other mother, but I think at the time when my mom was ill, I was really involved in that and I was putting everyone else first.
13:24
SPEAKER_01: And I remember there were times that I couldn't even like calm myself down.
13:30
SPEAKER_01: And my husband one time had to like literally put me in bed and be like, you just need to like sleep or something, because like I was spiraling.
13:38
SPEAKER_01: And it it was bad.
13:41
SPEAKER_01: But what I wasn't always choosing myself, which I still to this day, like I still do a lot for my kids, but now I know when something's not right, that I have to take a step back and be like, okay, I need some alone time, or I just need to do something for myself, like walk or listen to my my podcasts or my books and and you know, meditate, whatever that looks like in that moment.
14:06
SPEAKER_01: Um and comfort, you know, comfort, it wasn't really comfortable.
14:11
SPEAKER_01: Like in like in the beginning, it was really uncomfortable, and that was the most important thing was getting uncomfortable.
14:18
SPEAKER_01: I am I hate change.
14:20
SPEAKER_01: I hated change, I should say.
14:21
SPEAKER_01: I didn't like change, and that's what was my problem too.
14:24
SPEAKER_01: I didn't like the change of like, okay, my mom passed away now, and now I don't kind of don't know what to do.
14:31
SPEAKER_01: You know, like I don't have my mom here anymore to, you know, bounce things off and talk about because mothers know their kids, right?
14:37
SPEAKER_01: They know when they're separate and they're alien.
14:40
SPEAKER_01: And then I got uncomfortable.
14:43
SPEAKER_01: And and the most uncomfortable thing I did was open my mouth.
14:52
SPEAKER_01: Anyone that knows I don't need to laugh at me, but anybody that knows me knows I hate doing videos.
15:00
SPEAKER_01: Um and I know everyone's like, self-love, love, I do love myself, but like I just don't want to be on a video.
15:06
SPEAKER_01: But I I I'm getting more comfortable with that.
15:08
SPEAKER_01: But but that's what what I mean is like I wanted to share everything and I talk loud and I am loud, and I I come from a family of five kids.
15:16
SPEAKER_01: So I was the youngest, right?
15:17
SPEAKER_01: So trying to get words in sometime was kind of hard, you know.
15:20
SPEAKER_01: Like, so I'd be screaming my way in.
15:22
SPEAKER_01: But now I realize why I had to do that because I'm loud, I have an opinion, and it's probably going to be heard.
15:30
SPEAKER_01: If you don't like it, well, then go the other way.
15:32
SPEAKER_01: I don't know.
15:33
SPEAKER_02: I'm just well, I mean, okay, so it's funny that you say that.
15:37
SPEAKER_02: So my youngest, he is a man of few words.
15:41
SPEAKER_02: He really is not a big talker, but his when he opens his mouth, it's like, you know, it's almost like a slap in the face, right?
15:51
SPEAKER_02: One time it's it's really funny, really, because he he doesn't say much, but when he says it, you can't help but hear it, right?
15:59
SPEAKER_02: So my my mother-in-law was telling my father-in-law to talk quietly because he she didn't want you know people outside of our conversation to hear what he was saying.
16:09
SPEAKER_02: And so he stopped talking because what if I can't talk, and my son, he was like maybe eight, maybe ten at the time.
16:17
SPEAKER_02: He looks over at my mother-in-law and he says, God gave him a voice for a reason.
16:25
SPEAKER_02: And and all of us around, like we were sitting around a campfire, and we're we we kind of all look at each other like you, we can't even argue with that.
16:34
SPEAKER_02: Like I couldn't even say, you know, be respectful because he didn't say anything wrong, he wasn't out of place, right?
16:43
SPEAKER_02: But it makes like I always think of that because God has made us all our own unique person.
16:50
SPEAKER_02: Some of us are quiet, some of us are not, I am not quiet, right?
16:56
SPEAKER_02: Everyone who knows me knows I'm a chatterbox, right?
17:00
SPEAKER_02: And so I have to put that with true intention, and I think that's what you you mean by you know, I have a voice, I had to squeeze there, I had to squeeze my voice in there, but we all have our our time and our purpose for our voice, and we have to use it with intention at the right time.
17:21
SPEAKER_01: That is so true.
17:22
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, sometimes I have a problem, uh, not problem, a tendency to be like, well, I shouldn't have talked when I like I'm thinking you shouldn't have said that, or like it wasn't your turn to talk.
17:32
SPEAKER_01: Um, and it's funny you say that about the kids because my kids are the same.
17:35
SPEAKER_01: They'll they'll talk and they're loud and they they fight, they argue, all this stuff, but they're really good kids and they're they are respectful.
17:43
SPEAKER_01: And my husband and I were talking the other day, and I was like, you know what?
17:47
SPEAKER_01: As much as it drives me absolutely bananas, it's two girls, right?
17:51
SPEAKER_01: 17 and 13, but I want them to keep that about themselves.
17:55
SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
17:56
SPEAKER_01: It's not about them, nothing else, but just themselves releasing those emotions and sharing what they think because they got beautiful minds, especially kids.
18:05
SPEAKER_01: They're they're so unfiltered.
18:07
SPEAKER_01: It's like, let's maybe take a lesson from them a little bit.
18:10
SPEAKER_01: Don't tell my kids I said that, but yeah, it to go.
18:13
SPEAKER_02: Well, but that's motherhood, right?
18:15
SPEAKER_02: I mean, we learn best from our kids if we allow it, right?
18:19
SPEAKER_02: And so I I I agree with you.
18:21
SPEAKER_02: Like, don't shut your kids up, let them be who they are.
18:24
SPEAKER_02: You know, when my kids were younger, I didn't think like that, I'll be honest, right?
18:28
SPEAKER_02: I thought, you know, like I think like most of us, right?
18:31
SPEAKER_02: We we think that we have to be a certain way.
18:34
SPEAKER_02: And so that means we have to teach our kids to be that way as well.
18:37
SPEAKER_02: And then when we hit a certain age, we go, wait a minute, I've been working my ass off my whole life to not be this way, and it's still not working for me, right?
18:48
SPEAKER_02: What if I just embrace who I truly am?
18:50
SPEAKER_02: And then I was like, Well, if I have to embrace who I am, then I should embrace who my kids truly are, right?
18:57
SPEAKER_02: They're no different, right?
18:58
SPEAKER_02: They're human just like I am, right?
19:01
SPEAKER_02: So God has given them the voice, the behaviors, the actions that He has, right?
19:06
SPEAKER_02: Now, again, right, if you use them with good intentions, then you know you you you have to like sort of I don't know what to do.
19:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, like you pick your battles, right?
19:16
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, the war's not the war is not there to be fought by everyone, right?
19:21
SPEAKER_02: No, it isn't.
19:22
SPEAKER_01: And of course no, and our kids deserve this is the other thing.
19:26
SPEAKER_01: Our kids are facing a different kind of criticism alone in social media that we didn't have to deal with.
19:32
SPEAKER_01: Now imagine going home at night and being told you can't be yourself from the people you love, and on top of it, social media exactly, right?
19:42
SPEAKER_01: So I I really, I really am glad I'm embracing that now.
19:46
SPEAKER_01: Uh I know when they were little, you're like, you know, be quiet, don't yell, don't scream.
19:49
SPEAKER_01: It's a little different, right?
19:50
SPEAKER_01: You're in you're in places where you can't do that.
19:52
SPEAKER_01: But definitely learning what I'm learning with all the modularities I'm doing.
19:58
SPEAKER_01: I definitely think keeping your voice is one of the most important things anybody can do.
20:02
SPEAKER_01: A woman also can male for sure.
20:04
SPEAKER_01: So absolutely, definitely.
20:06
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
20:07
SPEAKER_02: Women are no different than men, right?
20:08
SPEAKER_02: Like we're not we're not saying here that you know women are allowed to talk and say their voice, and now the men have to be quiet.
20:15
SPEAKER_02: We're not saying that, right?
20:16
SPEAKER_02: Everybody should be allowed to be who they were on the earth to be, right?
20:21
SPEAKER_02: That's 100%.
20:23
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
20:23
SPEAKER_02: 100%.
20:24
SPEAKER_02: So now you have built uh your own business, Bloom Within Wellness.
20:29
SPEAKER_02: What do you think, or when do you think that the fear kind of, you know, that fear of being seen, that fear of doing things differently, how did it show up for you as you were building that?
20:40
SPEAKER_02: I mean, I know we've been talking about it, but how did it kind of show up where you can like put your finger on it and say, Oh my gosh, I did that because of the fear?
20:50
SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's a tough one because I'm I'm fearful every day.
20:53
SPEAKER_01: Um, no, like it showed up, I guess I was second my guessing myself a lot, right?
20:59
SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, every time I'd post something or an event and an offer or a retreat, there was a part of me that I always wondered, like, who am I to do this?
21:08
SPEAKER_01: Um, like, will people understand it?
21:11
SPEAKER_01: You know, will people judge me?
21:14
SPEAKER_01: And will they think I'm doing like too much, am I being too much?
21:20
SPEAKER_01: Um, but the building Bloomin' within wellness is deeply personal, like I already said.
21:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, it's not just a business anymore to me.
21:28
SPEAKER_01: It's definitely connected to my own healing, uh, to my own health, to using my voice, and to my experience of learning to use my voice, you know, and stop staying quiet.
21:43
SPEAKER_01: Um, the fear of being she as she oh my gosh, the fear of being seen showed up as wanting everything to be perfect before I shared it, which is unrealistic.
21:53
SPEAKER_01: Um I think the only time things work is when you actually do them and either you learn from them or they Come out on their own, the way it was supposed to be.
22:03
SPEAKER_01: And I was rewriting things over and over again and worried how about how people were going to perceive me.
22:10
SPEAKER_01: And then one of the major questions was wondering if I was allowed to take up space in this way.
22:16
SPEAKER_01: Because here I am, random human, went through this experience.
22:22
SPEAKER_01: I'm going to use this experience to help other women just bring the right practitioners to them, you know, even through my menopause coaching and my uh nutrition coaching, like just helping them love themselves again and hopefully helping them find a way where they wake up in the morning and it's not like, oh, here's another day.
22:46
SPEAKER_01: You know, be excited about your day.
22:48
SPEAKER_01: And I know every day can't be like that, but you would be surprised about how much we don't know about our female bodies through this phase.
23:00
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
23:01
SPEAKER_01: And oh, I can imagine.
23:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
23:03
SPEAKER_01: On the retreat, you would have been again another lady, so very, you know, wonderful lady.
23:08
SPEAKER_01: She said, Sylvia, I did not know anything that the pelvic floor therapist said to me.
23:18
SPEAKER_01: I did not know.
23:19
SPEAKER_01: Sorry, I said that wrong.
23:20
SPEAKER_01: I did not know this was all happening to me that I needed to work on this, that I needed to look at these things.
23:27
SPEAKER_01: She's like in her 50s.
23:30
SPEAKER_02: Wow.
23:30
SPEAKER_02: Now, okay, so that's fairly new information to us, right?
23:34
SPEAKER_02: I mean, yeah, there are people that have known it because I think I took my first sort of little, you know, exercise on the pelvic floor about probably seven or eight years ago.
23:44
SPEAKER_02: But it's still fairly new, like there's really not a whole lot of information out there.
23:49
SPEAKER_02: So I could see that.
23:51
SPEAKER_02: If you're not in the you know self-development world, how would you know?
23:56
SPEAKER_01: Well, this is the thing.
23:57
SPEAKER_01: So this is what this is why I'm doing this.
24:00
SPEAKER_01: I am going to present it in front of them.
24:05
SPEAKER_01: So if you're asking me, I'm not a doctor, but if you're asking me, the things that women should be focusing on, especially after having kids, would be your pelvic floor and your hormones and knowing where to start with that.
24:18
SPEAKER_01: I and this is the other thing.
24:20
SPEAKER_01: You can go to like so many different pelvic floor therapists, let's say.
24:24
SPEAKER_01: I went to two.
24:25
SPEAKER_01: The first one was she was still good.
24:28
SPEAKER_01: I didn't know any different, so I was like, this is great, no problem.
24:31
SPEAKER_01: The second one I went to completely changed everything for me.
24:34
SPEAKER_01: Wow.
24:34
SPEAKER_01: And that's the lady I used at my retreat.
24:37
SPEAKER_01: And I will tell you that she knows her stuff.
24:43
SPEAKER_01: She does not make you feel ashamed or judged or anything like that.
24:47
SPEAKER_01: And it what she's teaching you is really important, and not just on your just not on the feminine side of things.
24:54
SPEAKER_01: I'm talking about your full body function.
24:56
SPEAKER_01: People don't realize how interconnected your pelvic floor is to everywhere and everything.
25:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and she teaches that.
25:03
SPEAKER_01: And I I just I love her.
25:05
SPEAKER_01: I think she's so good, and I think it's so important that um that we learn that.
25:11
SPEAKER_01: So in my menopause coaching, that's definitely something I bring up.
25:15
SPEAKER_01: Because how do you go through life not knowing you have to do this?
25:21
SPEAKER_01: Because general practitioners won't do that, right?
25:24
SPEAKER_01: That's not their specialty, and it's not their fault, that's just not their specialty.
25:27
SPEAKER_02: Right.
25:27
SPEAKER_02: Well, they're they're only trained to share what they are trained to share, right?
25:32
SPEAKER_02: They can't share more otherwise.
25:35
SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
25:36
SPEAKER_02: Now, um, I mean, we've talked a lot about fear.
25:38
SPEAKER_02: I want to touch a little bit on courage.
25:41
SPEAKER_02: So now that you're living, you're not really living a different life, you've just added a little bit more excitement to your life with your new business.
25:49
SPEAKER_02: But tell me, what does courage look like for you now in your daily life, whether in business or personal, and not just like in theory, but in in actual practice, because we can say we have courage here, but you know, when the time comes, we're like, yeah, maybe another time.
26:08
SPEAKER_01: Well, I am gonna say this.
26:10
SPEAKER_01: Um, I didn't just excite my life with this new job of mine or business.
26:17
SPEAKER_01: I literally change my day-to-day.
26:20
SPEAKER_01: And I am so proud of myself to be able to say that because I am a person that doesn't like change.
26:25
SPEAKER_01: Uh, but the courage for me now looks like choosing the honest thing and making sure that it's working for the for Bloom Within Wellness, that it's actually going to serve the women that I serve, and not just to make people feel comfortable.
26:42
SPEAKER_01: An example of that would be again the pelvic floor therapist.
26:46
SPEAKER_01: There's some uh pretty, you know, interesting conversation that can happen with the pelvic floor therapist.
26:52
SPEAKER_02: For sure.
26:52
SPEAKER_01: And I remember the first time she presented, I was like, whoa, I'm like, you know, like this is like I I never thought to talk about this openly, but now I'm okay with it.
27:02
SPEAKER_01: And this is and the women that are are looking for help from me, this is what they're gonna get.
27:09
SPEAKER_01: They are gonna get the non-judgmental education, yeah.
27:15
SPEAKER_01: And another way courage shows up is literally posting an event before I I feel 100% ready, and that's exactly what I did with the retreat.
27:25
SPEAKER_01: Um, I compiled ideas, I thought about things I'd want to know and learn.
27:31
SPEAKER_01: I asked people who are older than me, younger than me, what they would want to know and learn.
27:37
SPEAKER_01: And I just kind of threw all the best practitioners I knew into the retreat and go.
27:45
SPEAKER_01: And we just went, and it was the most fantastic weekend.
27:49
SPEAKER_02: I did so much work, but I didn't care because you're getting the word out there, right?
27:54
SPEAKER_02: You're providing the value that the women needed to hear and get.
27:59
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, that's what it is, and honestly, and it's investing in my vision uh before I even have the proof to know it's gonna work out.
28:09
SPEAKER_01: That that for me is like crazy because my husband built, you know, we built a company years ago.
28:16
SPEAKER_01: I mean, he runs it and everything like that, but we built it from scratch, so I know the ebbs and flows of the investment part of it.
28:24
SPEAKER_01: And it's sometimes hard to throw your ideas out there not knowing if it's gonna be supported.
28:30
SPEAKER_01: But I believe in it so much that I know this is gonna work out.
28:34
SPEAKER_01: I absolutely am positive that my support, my system I'm creating for my clients are gonna make a positive change within them.
28:46
SPEAKER_02: Awesome.
28:47
SPEAKER_02: I love this.
28:48
SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited to hear you.
28:50
SPEAKER_02: Um so now you you have retreats, you have workshops, and you have created a community space.
28:56
SPEAKER_02: What patterns do you see in others around fear?
29:00
SPEAKER_02: And what do you think helps them to sort of soften or move around that?
29:06
SPEAKER_01: I think some of the patterns in the fear is rash decision, like um the fear of not opening up.
29:15
SPEAKER_01: Um, how to get them to soften is just like getting in the community, getting in the group, surrounding yourself by women who might be going through the same thing.
29:25
SPEAKER_01: And sometimes all it takes is they're like not there.
29:30
SPEAKER_01: There's sometimes these like two-hour events that I do.
29:33
SPEAKER_01: Okay, and then people come and they sit together and they don't talk at first because I know it's they're they're fearful of saying something what they think might be stupid or embarrassing, but by the end of it, they're like so softened, so open, we're laughing.
29:50
SPEAKER_01: Most actually, all the time we're laughing at my events because I see stupid shit all the time, and people think it's hilarious.
29:57
SPEAKER_01: But no, but I'm just saying, like, that's what I noticed with the fear, and that's from my own experience.
30:03
SPEAKER_01: Fear drove every decision I was making in the last two years prior to this, and I wouldn't, it is the worst feeling ever.
30:12
SPEAKER_01: Fear gives you nothing, fear gives you rash decision and bad decisions.
30:17
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, yeah.
30:18
SPEAKER_02: I love that you say you say stupid things.
30:20
SPEAKER_02: I all the time I yeah, I mean, I wouldn't say that I say stupid things, but I know that I say, you know, um, I I say things that I shouldn't say, right?
30:30
SPEAKER_02: And but but at the same time, Sylvia, it makes you more real.
30:34
SPEAKER_02: And when you're more real, it makes your your clients, your potential clients, and you know, the rest of the audience see you as more reachable and you know, like more real, and it makes them feel like they can let loose and you know, really relax into whatever the topic is, right?
30:54
SPEAKER_02: And so, I mean, we're talking menopause, and you know, every woman out there is going through their own journey with the whole menopause, right?
31:03
SPEAKER_02: And knowing that they're not alone, they might have a different symptom than the lady sitting beside them, but overall they know that I at least I can go to Sylvia.
31:13
SPEAKER_02: She might not be able to help me, but she'll know somebody who might be able to help me.
31:17
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
31:18
SPEAKER_01: And that's that's what it comes down to.
31:20
SPEAKER_01: Yep.
31:20
SPEAKER_01: And I have I'm gonna be launching a few things coming up in the next month that is gonna be a super support system for these women.
31:28
SPEAKER_01: And I am definitely the bridge.
31:30
SPEAKER_01: I love uh connecting people to the right practitioners, and uh from the retreat, I'm pretty sure that three of my facilitators for sure got a client each.
31:44
SPEAKER_01: And and if not more.
31:46
SPEAKER_01: Wow, I love that.
31:47
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I had one lady do four actual sessions on the retreat.
31:51
SPEAKER_02: Oh wow, that's beautiful.
31:53
SPEAKER_02: And so um maybe tell our listeners that uh you know how to reach you, like through I'm assuming Facebook's Instagram, website.
32:02
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so uh first I would say my email.
32:07
SPEAKER_01: So it's Sylvia at bloomwithinwellness.ca and that's Sylvia with S-I-L-V-I-A.
32:14
SPEAKER_01: And at hello bloom, no, sorry, that's my email at Bloom Within Wellness for my Insta.
32:22
SPEAKER_01: And then um I'd be happy to answer any questions, give some information, and I'm gonna be posting out a few more events in this upcoming week.
32:32
SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be doing uh brief so just some quick on this.
32:36
SPEAKER_01: Um in fall, I'm gonna be doing some close-to-home retreats, immersive retreats, two days close to home, so you know you're not too far, and some definitely some workshops there, and definitely gonna be doing more on uh retreat next summer as well at the Pomeroy again.
32:52
SPEAKER_01: Oh, beautiful.
32:53
SPEAKER_02: That sounds beautiful.
32:54
SPEAKER_02: Is there anything else that you would like to share with our listeners that I didn't ask you about?
33:01
SPEAKER_01: No, not really, because um I I could talk for hours, but you know what?
33:06
SPEAKER_01: No, honestly, I just say all I'm gonna say is stay curious.
33:11
SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and I love that learn because you can't walk into a room where you're trying to learn something and pretend like you know everything because you aren't gonna learn nothing then.
33:20
SPEAKER_01: So be open and if you don't like something, peace out and it's all good.
33:25
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, otherwise participate.
33:28
SPEAKER_02: I love that.
33:29
SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for joining me today, Sylvia.
33:32
SPEAKER_02: This is so awesome.
33:33
SPEAKER_01: Thank you, Christina.
33:35
SPEAKER_01: You have an amazing day.
33:37
SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
33:38
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
33:39
SPEAKER_02: What stands out from conversations like this is that courage doesn't always look bold or loud.
33:44
SPEAKER_02: Sometimes it looks like quiet decisions, subtle pivots, a willingness to listen inward instead of outward.
33:51
SPEAKER_02: Sylvia's journey is a reminder that fear doesn't have to be the ending point.
33:56
SPEAKER_02: It can actually be the threshold into something more aligned, more meaningful, and more grounded in who we really are.
34:03
SPEAKER_02: If this episode spoke to something in you, take a moment to notice where you might be standing at your own threshold right now.
34:10
SPEAKER_02: Where something in you is asking for a different kind of decision, even if it feels uncertain.
34:15
SPEAKER_02: And if you're in a season of navigating your own shifts, whether in life, identity, or work, I offer spaces and conversations through Infull Bloom Coaching and the Bloom Room for women who are ready to reconnect with themselves and move forward with more clarity and support.
34:31
SPEAKER_02: You're always welcome to explore it when the timing feels right.
34:35
SPEAKER_02: So until next time, keep choosing courage in the small moments.
34:38
SPEAKER_02: It adds up to more than you think.
34:42
SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening.
34:43
SPEAKER_00: This show was brought to you by Divas That Care.
34:45
SPEAKER_00: Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course on divas that care.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.