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31 | Is He a Psychopath? Her Husband Denies Sending Cruel Texts · Let's Talk! An Our2Gens Podcast

0:04
Let's talk. What's good?
0:06
Y'all? Welcome back.
0:07
I'm still 31. Y'all made it.
0:10
We're going to get right into it.
0:11
But now that you're here, please like and subscribe.
0:13
We really appreciate it. But we're going to head in first
0:15
with our story submission. This one is really good.
0:18
I'm ready. Bear with me.
0:19
All right? It said story submission.
0:22
Should I say something about a situation that happened five
0:24
years ago? When I was 16 I got my first job
0:29
at a local restaurant. One of our regulars was a
0:32
sheriff for the next town over. He came in frequently and I
0:35
never had an issue with him initially.
0:38
One day I got a random ad on Snapchat.
0:40
No profile picture, no name I recognized.
0:43
I added it back without thinking much of it, just being a dumb 16
0:47
year old. I didn't realize it was him at
0:49
first, but then the messages started.
0:52
He was saying things and asking for things that no grown man
0:54
should ever be asking to a 16 year old.
0:58
Things I shouldn't have even been exposed to at that age.
1:01
I'm not going to go into any details but you get the point.
1:04
And he knew I was 16. Yeah, at first I didn't respond.
1:08
I would just leave him on red and try to ignore it because I
1:11
really didn't know what to do. Like I said, I was 16 and dumb
1:15
for even keeping him on my phone in the 1st place.
1:17
Eventually I blocked him, but that didn't stop it.
1:21
He made another account, and then another, and then another.
1:24
It became a cycle where I would block him and he would come back
1:27
with a different username. And the worst part was I still
1:31
had to see him in person. Oh God.
1:33
He started coming into the restaurant more often, and
1:36
somehow it was always when I was working.
1:38
The way our parking lot was set up, you could see all the
1:41
employees carved from the road. And he knew what I drove, so he
1:45
knew when I was there, right? He would come in and talk to me
1:48
normally, like he wasn't just texting vile things to me the
1:50
night prior. And our uniform didn't help.
1:53
We wore Jean shorts and tank tops, which made me feel so
1:56
uncomfortable. Then I found out something that
1:59
made everything worse. He lived in my neighborhood.
2:04
So now this wasn't just someone from work, It was someone who
2:06
knew where I lived, what I drove, where I worked, and when
2:10
I'd be there. And on top of all that, he had a
2:13
wife and kids, a young daughter and a young son.
2:16
That part still makes me sick to my stomach.
2:19
This went on for almost 2 years until the restaurant eventually
2:22
closed. He would text me in the middle
2:25
of the night and say I heard you're driving home last night.
2:28
Your music was really loud. Just weird and creepy things.
2:31
I never told anybody because you know, he was a cop.
2:34
So I guess I felt like I would get in trouble somehow even
2:37
though that makes no sense. But again, I was 16 at the time,
2:41
I was just a kid who didn't know how to handle it.
2:43
Now I'm 21 and I see it completely differently.
2:47
If that happened to me now, I would shut it down immediately,
2:50
block him, report him, and tell someone.
2:53
But back then I didn't have that mindset yet and I still think
2:56
about it sometimes about how wrong it was and how easily it
2:59
could have escalated into something worse.
3:02
He was over twice my age and had a wife and kids at home while
3:05
saying this disgusting creepy vowel things to me and
3:08
borderline stalking. So she asked, is it too late to
3:12
say anything or do anything about this?
3:14
This was almost five years ago and I don't even know if he's
3:17
still a cop, but I realize now more than ever how disgusting
3:20
and wrong it was. My intent is not for somebody's
3:24
family to be broken up or for someone to lose their job, but
3:27
at the end of the day I feel like it didn't just stop with
3:29
me. People like that are going to be
3:31
like that until the day they die.
3:33
Should I do something about this or is it too late?
3:36
Well. 1st, thank you so much for writing in, for trusting us with
3:41
this, because my guess is that you haven't told very many
3:44
people, yeah, that this happened.
3:46
You are not in the wrong. You weren't in the wrong then,
3:49
you aren't in the wrong now. And if you feel like you need to
3:53
tell somebody about this, you should, you should.
3:55
My opinion is he 100% is doing this to other young girls.
3:59
Absolutely. He has a proclivity and he you
4:02
were just one of the girls if I don't know if you were the first
4:05
or what, but you were one of the girls that he harassing
4:10
relentlessly. And because he has, he can hide
4:13
behind this badge. He is free rein in his little
4:17
town to do whatever he wants to do.
4:19
And that's unacceptable. It's not your responsibility to
4:22
protect his marriage, his family, his job, none of that.
4:28
It's his responsibility too. And he's already broken it.
4:32
So you have no fault in this. So if you want to go straight to
4:36
the Sheriff's Office, if you do say something, if you want to go
4:39
to your parents, if you want to go to an advocate, do that
4:43
because you are not in the wrong for doing any of that.
4:46
Exactly. And no, I don't think it's too
4:48
late. I don't think crimes have a
4:50
expiration date. If it was committed and she did
4:53
something wrong, I can still come after you.
4:55
It doesn't matter how long ago and you.
4:56
The fact thing is, they have those statute of limitations for
4:59
certain things. I don't know what stalking is
5:01
because that sounds like stalking, but.
5:05
There are certain statutes of limitation, but the thing that I
5:08
would believe is like, let's tear down his credibility.
5:11
You know what I mean? It might not be a criminal
5:14
charge, but it could very well be civilly where he's no longer
5:18
trusted in the community as this person that he's presenting
5:22
himself to be. Exactly.
5:23
You know, Yeah. And his wife and his kids, if
5:27
they even know what's going on, I feel like they maybe deserve
5:30
to know some other things. Maybe you're not the only person
5:34
even at that restaurant that was having that same experience.
5:37
If you're working with other girls your age, they might have
5:40
been having the same situation. You guys were together and you
5:43
didn't realize it or There's so many things that could improve
5:47
with coming out with your story. And thank you again for
5:51
submitting it to us. But girl, yes, no, it's not too
5:56
late. And what you went through is
5:57
wrong and you shouldn't have gone through that.
5:59
And I'm sorry, but, and it's not your fault.
6:02
It's not. You didn't do anything wrong.
6:05
Yeah. Wow.
6:06
Thank you. Am I overreacting?
6:09
My husband said I was luggage with tits.
6:14
Oh, this is rage bait. I can feel it.
6:17
OK, let's go. There's a lot of context here
6:21
but this is the short version. My husband, male 28 and I female
6:25
28 got married at 20. I had just graduated and he was
6:29
finishing school. We both worked in retail for a
6:31
while. He was moving up the sales
6:33
ladder to where he is now and I was just working to make money
6:36
because my degree is in English and I wasn't finding a higher
6:39
paying job. A few weeks before we had our
6:42
oldest in June of 22, I left my job to be a stay at home mom
6:46
because daycare is expensive and my job was going nowhere.
6:48
Anyways, we were renting an apartment at the time.
6:51
Fast forward to September 22 and we find out that we are pregnant
6:56
with twins due July 23. Huge surprise because I have
7:00
PCOS and it took years to get pregnant with our first.
7:04
We had to move out of our apartment and buy a house.
7:07
We had to trade in our car for a minivan, leaving us with my
7:11
first car as our family car. We are living paycheck to
7:14
paycheck, still trying to recover from all of that.
7:17
Lord, my first car was hit twice by my sister in our driveway
7:21
when we were teenagers. Kidding, I was a kid and didn't
7:26
make her pay to fix it then because the damage was mostly
7:28
cosmetic. But now the bumper is falling
7:31
off the car which my husband drives to work today.
7:34
He took it to a Body Shop where they estimate all the repairs
7:37
will cost $6000. Excuse me?
7:40
Then I get a phone call from him basically saying that I don't
7:43
take accountability from my past decisions which have put us in a
7:47
bad spot financially because we can't afford the repairs or
7:50
another monthly car payment. And then he goes on to say that
7:53
I am just quote luggage. I don't care for myself like a
7:57
trophy wife should, so why should he be expected to provide
8:01
solely for our family? Is he joking?
8:05
He better be joking. I have a small business and do
8:08
freelance work to make ends meet.
8:11
He said that when he married me, I had ambition and now I'm lazy
8:14
because I stay at home. I honestly just cried until he
8:18
eventually left for work, but now I'm thinking about packing
8:21
up and leaving. Am I overreacting for thinking
8:23
that this kind of conversation and way of speaking to me may
8:26
result in the end of our marriage?
8:28
Girl, even if it does, seems like it might be the best
8:32
situation for you because he is a jerk.
8:36
I was like, bro, what? What?
8:39
I listen, He said she should be a trophy wife.
8:44
Trophy wifes don't live paycheck to paycheck.
8:47
Oh, period. OK, Their men take care of them.
8:50
Exactly. All right, that.
8:53
Part. Honestly OK, so you step your
8:57
game up so you can deserve a trophy wife you're.
9:00
Acting like he providing the best life ever.
9:03
Mind you, she's taking care of the kids.
9:05
Like I'm done having having this conversation honestly.
9:08
I brought this back because I have said this before in the
9:11
past. In 2022, economists estimated
9:15
that stay at home parents should earn $126,725 for the 18 jobs
9:22
that they do in the house. Period.
9:24
Teen jobs. So do not come for stay at home
9:27
parents. Lazy.
9:28
Lazy. Do you know how easy it is to
9:30
just go to work and come home to a clean house with dinner
9:33
cooked? Yeah, stop kids getting to
9:36
school on time every day. She got her own business.
9:40
Please. Excuse me.
9:42
Yeah, no, we're not going to have these conversations.
9:45
Luggage. That's unique.
9:46
That's unique. I don't even understand what
9:49
that means acting like he. I think in his mind, he has to
9:53
carry her around. He has to like make sure that
9:56
she's she's doing everything. But it seems like it's the other
9:58
way around for me. She's carrying his baggage
10:00
inside. It's the moment of.
10:06
Silence for that. That was for that.
10:08
Because stop. Not you cooking.
10:10
OK, I just don't like this. I was never even a stay at home
10:14
parent. But that is so offensive to the
10:17
person who is staying home, letting you go do what it is
10:20
that you do that part. And because you guys are
10:23
struggling financially, you're putting it on her right when
10:27
most likely you wanted her to stay home.
10:29
Exactly. So if it's just stress or
10:31
whatever that made them say that you should never take it out out
10:34
on your partner, it's not fair. You guys are literally in this
10:38
together. Literally.
10:40
Like come on, don't be a jerk. Well, he was.
10:44
And I can't wait to talk more about this on our little after
10:47
party that we have on Patreon. OK, so get the BTS.
10:52
We will continue this conversation later.
10:55
Period. All right, so we went through
10:59
and we found a bunch of articles, of course, and I
11:02
wanted to talk about this woman who had given birth to 69
11:06
children. Let's stop there.
11:08
What now? 69 children over 27 pregnancies,
11:14
40 years. That is insane.
11:18
She was pregnant through her twenties, 30s.
11:21
And her 40s. Excuse me, but this woman, if we
11:25
can go to my screen, please let me see if I can pronounce her
11:28
last name right. Valentina Vasilieva.
11:31
I believe sure. So she was reportedly in
11:34
history, one of the most fertile woman in history.
11:37
There's not really much on her, not really.
11:40
But she was born in like, the 18th century back in Russia.
11:43
And I mean. She was a peasant.
11:46
Her husband was a peasant. That was like a, a way they
11:49
would classify people. Yeah.
11:50
So they didn't have money. They didn't have money, but
11:52
there was not a lot of documentation off of this.
11:55
So a lot of it was just like word in the mouth.
11:57
A lot of it was like, I don't know like there was a rumor that
11:59
this woman had yada yada yada. But like so a lot of people
12:02
don't believe it and a lot of people do.
12:04
But apparently she had twins, triplets and quadruplets and
12:08
literally the article that I read about her literally called
12:11
her a womb with an assembly line.
12:13
Yes. I mean cuz it was just in and
12:15
out cuz look. Like so it was.
12:17
It was constant. I'm getting itchy just thinking
12:19
about this. She said I'm the second she had
12:23
a kid, she was pregnant again and it was like go, go, go.
12:27
They could not afford, they couldn't have been the people
12:30
who afforded like a wet nurse. So she's nursing these babies as
12:32
soon as they come out. That's like a natural birth
12:35
control. I mean, it's not 100% effective,
12:37
but so it kind of suppresses things.
12:39
So I have no idea how she was just like boom, boom, boom.
12:42
Get off her. Literally leave her alone.
12:46
Get out my girl Valentina, you don't need it anymore.
12:49
I. Swear.
12:50
Did you read how after her husband outlived her and then we
12:54
got married again and had eighteen more children?
12:57
So people are wondering who was the medical mystery, him or her?
13:01
Both of them together, they were just this bomb.
13:05
Insane, insane. I we don't know if she like
13:09
enjoyed being pregnant. We don't know anything.
13:11
There's literally not much on her.
13:13
I think one of the main records of her was from a monastery in
13:17
Russia. And they basically just like,
13:21
you know, kept track of all of her pregnancies.
13:23
And they're like, I think that she had 27 pregnancies, 16 sets
13:26
of twins, seven sets of triplets and four sets of quadruplets.
13:30
And they're like, oh, my God, this is crazy.
13:32
Did you hear about her? That's it.
13:33
That's all we know. Just gossip.
13:34
That's all we know. Just gossip, word to mouth.
13:36
And so people not really sure if they wanted to believe it or
13:38
not. There's not much documented on
13:40
her but girl. What do you think?
13:44
Do you think that's possible? See, that was another thing too.
13:49
So let's talk about just the fact that childbirth is like
13:52
crazy and even having one kid is insane, dangerous.
13:56
And for her to be constantly pregnant and constantly having
14:00
kids is insane. And she was able to like live
14:03
through that normally and without no complications,
14:07
nothing. I don't mean to be negative, but
14:09
the possibility and the probability of that is very low.
14:13
Yes, I agree with that. In addition, there's not much
14:16
record on her kids. Like no one can find her kids.
14:19
69 of them. You can't find them.
14:20
We don't have one legacy. We ain't got one.
14:22
Like invented something. Yeah, no one.
14:24
Did anything? It is something that's a lot of
14:26
people. If if I'm gonna have 69 of you,
14:29
at least one of you is gonna do something, OK?
14:33
You feel I need something? I need a house, Okay, 69 of
14:36
nothing, please. Gave up my body to be an
14:38
assembly line of human beings. I need something.
14:41
You couldn't pay me enough. I'm sorry.
14:43
I'm sorry you couldn't pay me enough.
14:45
Valentino was a G though, okay? She was a St.
14:47
A St. But literally I just you see a
14:51
bunch of pictures about her, like the idea of her kind of
14:55
like she was this, I don't know, entity that people heard of.
14:58
And they're like, if you wanted to be fertile, she was the woman
15:01
to look to. And it was just like pictures
15:04
and drawings and stuff, but literally not much on her.
15:07
But there were like a couple of people who also, overtime in
15:11
history, had a lot of kids as well.
15:14
There was this woman, Barbara Stratsman, in the 15th century.
15:17
She apparently had 50 babies. This is crazy to me.
15:22
What 50 why are we doing this? Well, no birth control, none,
15:27
none. No autonomy, no bodily autonomy.
15:30
And also it's just like what do you do if you if you are
15:33
pregnant, there is no other option.
15:35
There's no you just. Got to have this kid which is in
15:38
talk about the like. Yeah, sorry.
15:40
I was like, what make you frowny faces?
15:41
No, but there was. Another woman too.
15:43
In Africa. Yes, talk about her.
15:45
Let's. Talk about her.
15:46
So Miriam. I want to see if I can pronounce
15:48
her name right. Nabazatini.
15:51
Babeir. Babeir.
15:53
So Miriam Nazatini Babir, I think that's how you pronounce
15:56
her name. She was born in 1980 and she
15:59
holds the record in Africa for the most children.
16:01
She had 44 kids, but she had 44 kids after being married off to
16:07
a man who was 28 years older than her when she was 12.
16:10
She had her first kid when she was 13.
16:14
Yep, and guess who ended up leaving her with 44 children?
16:18
The man. That is.
16:21
Unbelievable. Yeah, she had to work to support
16:24
44 children if you want to see. Her face, this is hard.
16:27
Look at that. Her story should be a little
16:30
louder, honestly, because that's insane.
16:33
Having kids at 13 pretty much not even stopping.
16:37
No, no, it was back to. Back-to-back.
16:39
That's insane. Another St.
16:42
Yeah, bless her. But no, no, no.
16:46
Again. You couldn't pay me enough.
16:49
I don't think so. I don't even like kids like
16:51
that. You know what I mean?
16:52
Like, I'm sorry. And no, this that, the kids.
16:56
Be following her around. I know get.
16:58
Away from me. Get away.
17:02
From me, but literally, honestly, all of those women are
17:06
Saints. All the women who were never
17:08
documented, they're Saints because that's insane for you to
17:13
be like, my only purpose is to have kids and you're like the
17:16
sole person keeping the planet's population alive like.
17:22
What it's like, thank God for you.
17:25
We are all we're all from you because of you that's having all
17:31
the babies. That's insane.
17:32
Thank you, man. Alright, I have a very serious
17:37
question for you. OK, yes, Would $66,000 a year be
17:42
enough for you to be a man's breeder?
17:45
No, if you don't mind. Going to my screen, this is Sir
17:50
Benjamin Slade. He's 79 years old, a British
17:54
baronet. And I had to look this up.
17:57
A baronet is below a Baron but above a knight.
18:00
So he's sandwiched right there. He's like the spare.
18:04
Yeah, so he has a multi $1,000,000 fortune, a 1300 acre
18:09
estate and a nine month supply of frozen sperm.
18:13
Now all he needs is quote a good breeder.
18:17
Oh, so this is giving that movie with the syringe.
18:20
Don't. I don't want.
18:21
To talk about that, I don't want to talk about that movie at all,
18:24
what it was. Don't breathe, don't breathe.
18:26
OK, so spoiler, sorry spoiler skip ahead like maybe 30
18:31
seconds. But at the end of that movie The
18:33
blind guy had a syringe with his sperm and he was just like right
18:37
into the chick. So this is what it's giving.
18:39
He froze his sperm, too. Yeah, a nine month supply just
18:42
in case it doesn't work. It's giving Handmaid's Tale.
18:44
But anyway, let's move on. All right, so he's very serious
18:48
about that. He's been working on this for
18:49
decades. OK so he has Tinder accounts and
18:53
when I look at this picture I feel like this is his Tinder
18:57
profile. He has.
18:58
Got dogs, he's got guns, he said.
19:01
He said I'm. Gonna kill him with this one.
19:03
I'm gonna kill him with this. Oh my God, he taking out
19:07
newspaper ads. He even starred in the TV
19:10
series. OK, which So I looked it up.
19:12
It's called millionaires looking for love.
19:14
You can find it on YouTube. He was looking for a young woman
19:17
decades younger than her on this episode.
19:20
Oh my. God, so he needs.
19:21
A wife so he can produce an heir and then a spare.
19:25
All right, but there are. Requirements.
19:27
Don't get too excited, ladies. OK?
19:30
No Scorpios, period. Why?
19:32
You don't want Scorpios? Why?
19:34
And that was #1 on the list. OK.
19:36
If you were born in late October, November, screw off.
19:39
You don't want you. OK?
19:41
No Guardian News outlet readers. So I don't read The Guardian,
19:45
but it's a liberal outlet. I look at it.
19:47
You don't want no liberals, OK? Oh God.
19:50
All right. People from countries beginning
19:52
with the letter I Why? What?
19:55
Why that's so specific? Or is there a reason with green
20:03
in their flag? He said need not apply.
20:07
I don't understand why. Let us know somebody let us know
20:13
what that is. Why?
20:14
Why? OK, He needs you to have a
20:17
helicopter life license. Why?
20:20
And legal expertise because it will be useful.
20:23
For what? Helicopter.
20:24
Rights. I don't know when he's getting
20:26
older, you know, maybe he needs to do his estate and he requires
20:31
that you be 3 to 4 decades younger than him.
20:34
What? Oh my God, bro, Oh my God, get
20:37
that? Air and that spare.
20:38
Oh my God bro. OK but he said it's OK if a
20:43
daughter is birthed somewhere in between, just not first, right?
20:47
But he already has a daughter with an American poet named
20:52
Sahara Sunday, Spain, but has no contact with her.
20:55
You're kidding. Nope, because she's not a boy.
20:59
She's not an heir or a spare for him.
21:01
You're kidding. Yep.
21:04
Oh, and last, because he's having trouble with liquidity
21:08
right now. He would prefer she had a quote.
21:11
Little private capital and income, but a large fortune
21:15
would be more helpful. Wait.
21:17
Excuse me, excuse me, why are you trying to have me meet you
21:21
halfway? You're supposed to be providing
21:23
the money. I'm providing the babies multi
21:25
$1,000,000 estate and I need to have a job and he said bring
21:29
it's my job. Is my womb sweetie, that part
21:32
OK? I'm not a Scorpio.
21:36
What do you have against? Scorpios, why no countries with
21:39
eyes in them and green in their flag?
21:41
I am I'm I'm lost so in. Return he gets quote If you want
21:48
a new car, you get a new car, not some old banger.
21:51
He was quoted by saying that old banger an annual salary of
21:56
50,000 British pounds which is $66,000, cheap housing and
22:01
meals. The bare minimum, take it or
22:04
leave it. OK, it are the meals.
22:06
Like what beans and toast the no I don't want.
22:09
And hash. I think I'm.
22:12
Good bro and for 66,000 I'm sorry but I can make more at
22:16
McDonald's but he's cracking. Me up to annual salary so this
22:20
is my job. I honestly pass if I saw this on
22:26
indeed. Are you sure?
22:27
Hold on. Look at that.
22:29
We got property, OK? He's standing in front of the
22:32
property. He hired people.
22:34
Yeah. We had dead animals on the wall
22:36
there. Oh my God, he's smiley.
22:40
He's. So proud of it too, with his low
22:42
angle up. Oh yeah, we love a low and a up
22:46
Yeah. He thought he ate with that.
22:47
He really did. So if you're.
22:49
Interested. I'm sure you can find him on
22:50
Tinder. Bra bra.
22:55
I'm going to be so upset if he actually got off a.
22:59
Case this is crazy and I would like a finder's fee if anybody
23:04
that part, that part, I'll take one of your dogs.
23:08
They look miserable. That's great vibe.
23:15
Thank. You all right?
23:17
I have a Reddit. Relationship advice?
23:19
I genuinely think my husband is a psychopath.
23:22
Oh. Well then, this one's a little.
23:24
Long bear with me, OK? I'm 30.
23:27
Five female and my husband is 36, male.
23:30
We've been married for 10 years and have two boys, seven and
23:33
five. I honestly don't know what to
23:35
think anymore. About three months ago my
23:37
husband started sending me really nasty messages while he
23:40
was at work. At first it was just mean
23:42
comments, stuff like telling me I'm lazy, that I'm a terrible
23:46
mother, and that he regrets marrying me.
23:48
It was completely out of nowhere.
23:50
The weird part is that when he would come home from work, he'd
23:53
act completely normal, like nothing had happened.
23:56
He'd kiss me, ask what's for dinner and play with the kids.
23:59
No. No, the first time.
24:01
It happened. I thought maybe who's having a
24:03
bad day at work, but the messages kept coming.
24:06
Sometimes he'd send them during the day, sometimes late at night
24:09
if he was working overtime. They got worse too, saying
24:13
things like I'm useless, that I'm lucky he hasn't left me yet
24:16
and no one else would want me. The first few times I confronted
24:20
him, he acted confused. Like genuinely confused He would
24:23
say things like what messages or you must be misunderstanding
24:27
something. I literally showed him the text
24:29
on my phone and he just stared at them and said he didn't send
24:32
them claiming he lost his phone which he did but he had a new
24:36
one. It was still texting and calling
24:38
from that number. I know it sounds ridiculous but
24:43
he didn't look guilty. He looked confused, almost
24:46
scared. I thought maybe he was
24:47
gaslighting me, but it was such a weird way to do it because he
24:50
never got angry in person. Finally, about a month ago, I
24:54
snapped. I showed him a bunch of the
24:56
messages at once and told him I couldn't keep living like this.
25:00
I told him if he hated me so much he should just say it to my
25:02
face. He kept insisting that he didn't
25:05
send them and said maybe someone was messing with us.
25:08
At that point I was done. I packed clothes, grabbed the
25:11
kids and went to stay with my parents who live in the same
25:13
state. They were.
25:15
Amazing and helped me so much and never felt luckier to have a
25:18
close family. Since then the messages have
25:21
continued with the same number and the same horrible tone.
25:24
Things like running to mommy's house just proves my point.
25:28
You're pathetic. You'll come, but you.
25:30
Didn't send that. You'll come crawling back
25:32
eventually. I sent him.
25:34
Screenshots back to the same number and still he swore again
25:38
that he wasn't sending them. He said he lost his phone at
25:41
work and had to get a replacement but he still had the
25:43
same number and when he when he would show me his phone I
25:47
couldn't see the messages. I just thought he was deleting
25:50
them. Though he said someone must have
25:52
found the phone and was messing with me.
25:54
Last week though I let the kids stay with him for a couple of
25:57
weeks since he's still their dad and they miss him.
25:59
He's still denying everything. He says he never sent those
26:02
messages and they think someone is using his own phone.
26:05
Meanwhile the text haven't stopped.
26:08
At this point I don't even know what to believe anymore.
26:10
Either he's lying to my face or something really weird is going
26:13
on. Has anyone ever dealt with
26:15
something similar? I feel like I'm going insane.
26:18
I don't know what to believe. I'm generally had the most
26:20
perfectly relationship before this and I don't know what to
26:23
do. I'm scared I'm breaking my
26:25
family apart for no reason but some of the texts have been so
26:28
horrible I can't include them here.
26:31
I feel like I'm going insane right?
26:33
Because So what he is claiming is that the good text messages
26:38
in the text thread are from him, but the bad text messages in the
26:42
same text thread, right are not from him right, Just the
26:48
loading. Signal on your head I.
26:51
Am I don't understand what he's talking about And I believe her
26:55
that it's like, what am I supposed to do?
26:57
It's right here on my phone. It's in this.
27:00
I can understand if it was like a separate text, like it's in
27:03
between. I'm coming home, I'm on my way
27:06
home and I hate you. OK, I'm here.
27:08
Like I don't what? What?
27:11
And I don't would that work if you lost your phone and you have
27:14
that old chip? It wouldn't work, right?
27:19
If you have a new phone and a new chip, it doesn't matter that
27:22
the text that the number is the same, same.
27:25
You wouldn't be in the same text.
27:26
Shut up. I don't believe you.
27:29
I'm working through it and I'm just like, you know what?
27:32
No, I just, I've come to the Yes, I've come.
27:34
To the collision. I don't believe you.
27:36
I don't believe you. He'd have to prove a little more
27:39
to me because he could very easily delete the bad text
27:42
messages before he comes home. True.
27:44
And he's just like, that's why you ran to mommies.
27:46
And he's like, I didn't say that.
27:47
I don't know where that came from.
27:49
What? Well, good for you, I have an
27:52
update. Oh God.
27:54
Watch me be wrong, I need to know after months of.
27:57
Receiving the messages from her husband's phone number, the OP
28:01
decided that it was coming from his old phone, which is still
28:04
connected to his WhatsApp account.
28:07
He had WhatsApp. Initially.
28:09
Her husband denied sending the messages, claiming he lost the
28:12
phone and suggested someone else was using it.
28:15
As the messages escalated into threats, the OP went into the
28:18
police who tracked the phone to a Co worker's house, someone
28:22
that the Co worker considered a friend.
28:25
Since then she found out the Co worker had been having an affair
28:29
with her husband for over a year and had used his old phone to
28:33
tormentor her. What I am a writer and I didn't
28:39
come up with that. Meanwhile, this is like a very
28:42
rough summary because she wrote a longest thing, so I just
28:44
summarized it. Oh.
28:46
Wow, her husband. Said that he didn't realize that
28:49
was happening but the wife couldn't believe him.
28:51
Opie took her kids and moved in with her parents and at this
28:54
point she couldn't trust him so the marriage was over.
28:57
She filed for divorce and Opie is now quote prioritizing her
29:01
children's safety and her own healing.
29:03
That was her final update as she.
29:05
Should that was amazing. Oh my God wait, wait, wait,
29:16
let's get into get into this. So he was having an affair with
29:19
a coworker, Yes. And he broke it off.
29:22
And so the coworker was sending terrible messages to his wife,
29:26
Yes. Yes.
29:27
With the lost phone, he lost it probably while he was over at
29:31
her at her house. Yeah, it's probably under her
29:32
bed. Yeah.
29:34
And he said, I lost it before, I don't know where it is.
29:35
So we got a new one logged into WhatsApp.
29:38
And apparently on WhatsApp you can be logged in to multiple
29:42
accounts or like one account over multiple devices.
29:46
So he's sending them. He won't see that it's sent from
29:49
his phone because it's not. It's sent to on another phone
29:53
but all the messages are on the same thread.
29:56
That's crazy insane. So he genuinely did not know, he
30:01
didn't do it and I'm. Sure, he was like, what is
30:03
happening? But you still.
30:05
Cheated he still cheated. Let's this wouldn't have
30:07
happened if you hadn't have cheated because you left the
30:09
phone at your side pieces house who you work with.
30:12
You're so messy. You're so messy.
30:14
But her tracking and she's like, I know this house.
30:18
Yeah, that is. Oh my God, I'm so glad you had
30:21
an update. I know it was right.
30:23
Underneath it I was. I was a little late, actually.
30:26
This was like a month ago. Oh my goodness, I know.
30:29
Good one. I know.
30:35
Am I the asshole for lying to our babysitter about the reason
30:38
we let her go? OK, up until.
30:42
Recently we had a regular babysitter for our two kids.
30:45
I'll call her Maya, a senior at the local high school.
30:48
She wants to be a teacher in the future and it showed because she
30:51
was great with the kids. Our oldest adored her and our
30:55
youngest would run over to her without hesitation.
30:57
Which, if you know you know when you have a toddler, is basically
31:00
a five star review in itself. However, there was an issue.
31:04
I hate typing this out because it feels mean, but it was a
31:07
hygiene one. She had consistently noticeable
31:11
body odor, She wore some of the same pieces of clothing for
31:14
multiple consecutive days, which I'm sympathetic to because there
31:18
might be a financial situation at home.
31:20
And her nails and her hands didn't seem to be clean.
31:24
I tried to ignore it at 1st and 2nd, guessed myself like maybe
31:28
we're all we've all just had a long day, I'm being uptight,
31:31
over exaggerating, etcetera. But it got to the point where
31:34
I'd come home and feel like I needed to wipe everything down
31:37
after she left. I know it might sound a bit
31:40
much, but I also have a 2 year old who likes to put things in
31:43
her mouth. It started making me anxious
31:46
every time we left the house. Where my husband and I might be
31:49
the assholes is that instead of saying anything to Maya
31:52
directly? Because how do you say something
31:54
like that without crushing a teenager's spirit?
31:57
We told her we had a tighter budget and couldn't afford
31:59
regular care anymore. She seemed disappointed but took
32:03
it well. We paid her for her last time
32:06
plus some extra and thanked her for everything. 3 weeks later we
32:09
found our current sitter, I'll call her Lily.
32:12
There have been no problems with cleanliness.
32:14
She noticeably tends after herself, washes her hands
32:17
without being asked etcetera. It's easier and I don't feel on
32:21
edge in my house. The thing is that Lily and Maya
32:24
go to the same school and our acquaintances.
32:28
Now y'all being messy for that. At some point, Maya found out
32:32
Lily was working for us and asked what we're paying her.
32:36
Of course we're giving her the same rate we paid Maya, so now
32:39
Maya thinks we didn't stop using her because of money.
32:43
Maya. Texted me yesterday.
32:45
She didn't come across as angry, but it had a tone where I could
32:47
tell she was hurt and kind of indirectly calling us out.
32:51
She said she wished we'd just been honest instead of making it
32:53
about money and that she felt bad to find out there was some
32:56
deception even though she didn't know what it was.
33:00
So now I feel guilty but also understand why we did what we
33:03
did because I wasn't going to be like hey you smell and it's
33:06
becoming a problem in our home. That'd be brutal.
33:09
She's young and that kind of comment would stick with her.
33:12
But then again, maybe I took away her chance to fix it.
33:15
I don't know. Part of me thinks we chose the
33:18
kinder path and another part thinks we were cowards.
33:21
My husband says we handled it fine and not everything needs to
33:24
be said out loud, especially something that personal.
33:28
My mom said lying to avoid uncomfortable combos always
33:31
backfires and I should. Have known that.
33:34
Which is a fairpoint. Am I the asshole?
33:37
No, I don't think you are. I think that maybe it could have
33:40
been handled better, but I don't think what you did makes you
33:45
one. No, I think this is a situation
33:49
in which you were employing her. So certain places of employment,
33:53
they're saying, hey, I need you to come with your hair tied back
33:57
or there's certain requirements, you know what I mean?
34:00
So I feel like that could have fit into one of the employment
34:03
like requirements. Then like had a conversation.
34:06
It didn't have to be like accusatory.
34:08
You didn't have to like come at her, but there could have been a
34:11
way for you guys to communicate. And even if you still decided to
34:15
like fire her, essentially, she deserved the honesty.
34:18
Agreed, agreed. So that's what.
34:20
Leans me more towards the asshole because of the way they
34:23
handled it. Yeah.
34:24
If you don't want her in your home anymore, that's one thing.
34:27
But there, if this were a regular job, right?
34:29
Let's say this was a corporate job, you would need to sit down
34:32
with her and tell her what your expectations are and how she
34:35
isn't meeting them, Right? Right.
34:37
So if my hands aren't clean enough, if my clothes aren't
34:40
clean enough, whatever. It's a difficult conversation,
34:42
but that's something that needs to be said.
34:44
Yeah. So then if she does not do that,
34:47
you are completely justified in terminating right?
34:50
Your contract yeah this isn't she's just in your home you have
34:54
every right to not have someone in your home if you don't want
34:56
them to but it's rude to give a reason and it's a lie exactly
35:02
which if a big company did that that would have been illegal
35:05
that's you can't do that so but then thinking that this is more
35:09
like a. More of a friendly situation
35:11
then I'm employing you to take care of my kids.
35:14
I think that's where it messed up 100%.
35:17
It was a little bit more personal than it should have
35:19
been and in that case hurt her more because it's like and she
35:22
doesn't know. What it was, she has no idea.
35:24
So it's me. So now personally, you just
35:26
didn't like me and and that's why you let me go, right.
35:30
And if we're being real, she's working there for clothes.
35:33
She's wearing the same clothes over and over again.
35:35
Yes, it was probably a financial situation.
35:37
We don't know what's going on with her home.
35:39
You really liked her. If you were, I don't want to be
35:43
like if you were a good person, but it's like if you cared about
35:46
her, I would think you could have just said something to her,
35:49
pulled her aside and said is there something going on?
35:54
Do you need to use our facilities?
35:56
Do you need something like that? Yeah, just to really want it, if
36:00
you really cared. But if you didn't, it's fine.
36:03
Go ahead. And now you have a new one who's
36:04
everything you wished she could be, who's friends with.
36:08
The old one. Why would you do that?
36:09
There's so many kids at that school.
36:10
Come on. I know, I know, God.
36:13
But I mean, I'm on the fence about saying that They're just.
36:16
They're bad people. Yeah.
36:18
I think it could have been handled better, but like.
36:21
You. Didn't do the best that you
36:23
could have done. So we're here now.
36:26
Yeah. Agreed.
36:28
Good one. Yeah.
36:30
To go back to. Our story times.
36:32
I have a crazy story time. This one has to do with Mount
36:35
Everest. Basically the Mount Everest tour
36:38
guides were accused of poisoning their climbers to force fake
36:43
rescues. If we could go to my screen, it
36:47
sounds exactly is what I just said.
36:49
They basically did this fraud scheme for $20 million,
36:54
insurance fraud scheme, and they were drugging the climbers to
36:57
trigger like, well, basically they put like baking powder and
37:01
uncooked chicken and like rat pellets and stuff in the things
37:04
that they were eating and drinking so that they would show
37:06
symptoms of what was it called, how to do sickness.
37:10
So then they would call an emergency evac from a
37:12
helicopter. The helicopter would come get
37:14
them. They would charge them, even if
37:17
it was like multiple people in one helicopter, they would
37:19
charge them like they were separate helicopter trips too.
37:23
So we're stacking up their money and making people sick and then
37:28
charging them for the trip. Back down yes that's insane yes
37:32
because they'd be like you feeling a little nauseated it's
37:35
probably altitude sickness you should head down and we're going
37:37
to call you an evac and of course they're.
37:39
Going to say yes because I don't know.
37:42
So I did some research into this because first of all, I will
37:44
never, ever climb Mount Everest. OK, Yeah, not after I watched
37:49
that movie too. Yeah, Everest.
37:50
It was a very good movie, so good.
37:51
But never. But I had to research because I
37:53
was like, I feel like people train for a long time for this
37:55
and they pay a lot of money. And I was correct.
37:57
You end up training for like 12 months at least to climb Mount
38:02
Everest, and you end up paying between 45 and $100,000.
38:07
Excuse me. Yes.
38:08
Because of permits. You got to pay for these guys
38:10
who were poisoning them, equipment, oxygen, all these
38:14
things just to be able to get up there.
38:15
It's a once in a lifetime bucket list type thing and you're
38:19
ruining it for all this scam, all these scams.
38:22
Just to get more money. That's upsetting.
38:24
First of all, you'd be getting paid a lot of money to be a guy
38:27
to do this for people. Do it well, and maybe you can
38:30
continue making your money the good way.
38:32
That way. Like, I know, but this was a
38:34
huge scam, right? It had it dealt with a bunch of
38:36
different people. Yeah, a bunch of different
38:38
people. Honestly, there were 32 people
38:39
that were charged. 11 people were arrested so far.
38:43
They said like 4782 climbers were affected in between 2022
38:49
and 2025. So they were doing this
38:51
frequently. Wow.
38:53
Frequently. They had the people who were
38:55
flying the helicopters involved. They had the people who were
38:58
climbing up there involved. Like this was a business, y'all?
39:02
It was so big. It was.
39:03
It was. I'm glad they got caught.
39:05
Yeah, because apparently we're going into climbing season right
39:07
now. It started on March 30th season,
39:10
I guess. What is climbing season?
39:11
It was like the weather. It seems it's always cold.
39:14
There's cold and there's cold. Yeah, like there's like cold and
39:18
then there's death. So maybe they go when it's not
39:22
deaf, but just like cold, just cold.
39:24
Because there's layers to this apparently.
39:27
I don't know y'all. Thank you.
39:30
Yeah, that's insane. So they're still going through
39:32
and like basically charging them, getting them to go,
39:36
getting their court dates and everything.
39:37
But this was wrong. They are caught and that's
39:40
insane. Yeah.
39:41
Again, if you guys are going up to Everest, like, good on you.
39:46
Yeah, not doing it. All right.
39:48
So have you ever seen a baby pigeon?
39:51
Now that you mention it. No, they're always full grown.
39:57
They're always full grown. So do you buy going to my
40:00
screen? This is what a baby pigeon looks
40:02
like. They're kind of ugly.
40:03
They are very ugly. They are very ugly.
40:05
And for the people listening on our podcast, just just Google
40:08
what a baby pigeon looks like. They're kind of funny looking.
40:11
But I asked this because it got me thinking like, why haven't I
40:15
seen a baby pigeon? Such a good point though,
40:18
because we lived in the Midwest for a little while and at this
40:21
time of year, all the the geese and the ducks, they got their
40:24
cute little yellow babies, their fluffy babies.
40:26
Cutest thing ever. Y'all so cute but never like a
40:29
cute little pigeon. And so apparently these birds
40:33
are part of the altricial category of birds.
40:37
And those birds get stuck in the house for 35 days.
40:42
Their moms don't let them leave. They have to stay there.
40:44
Why? I have no idea.
40:46
She provides everything that they need.
40:48
She brings them their food, make sure they're protected because
40:50
after 35 days, they're basically full grown.
40:53
What? Yeah.
40:54
So all these pigeons we see flying around, some of them are
40:57
actually teenagers. And it's really difficult to
40:59
tell the difference. I don't know what.
41:02
To do with this information I know.
41:04
I was just, I went down a very nerdy rabbit hole.
41:07
This is insane. So you're.
41:09
Holding me hostage, but it's for my own good.
41:11
It is for your own good because then by the time that you fly
41:13
out of this nest, you are full grown.
41:15
Because you know, we see the little birds that like fly out
41:17
the nest and some of them survive and some of them don't.
41:20
And it's so sad. It is.
41:22
This is why there's so many damn pigeons everywhere because they
41:25
make sure they figured it out. But one thing I also realized, I
41:29
don't know if you knew that they are traditionally bad at making
41:34
nests that do you see the nest? Sorry, we're looking at a
41:41
picture of a of a sidewalk with a handful of grass on the side
41:46
and the egg right next to the grass.
41:49
That'll do. They are just not good at Oh my
41:52
God, so the adapted. And if you see these are all on
41:56
concrete, they don't put them in trees, they put them on
41:58
buildings because. I've never seen a pigeon out in
42:01
the middle of the the the country.
42:03
No, they're always, they're always in the city.
42:06
Right in the city. And so they're on buildings and
42:08
high ledges, they're under bridges and they're an abandoned
42:11
attics. And so like if you walk into
42:13
like an old church that's been abandoned, you'll see Pella
42:15
pigeons in there. True, because that's where they
42:17
live. That is very true.
42:18
I got to show you like really with these, with these necks.
42:24
He grabbed 4. Sticks.
42:26
That'll do, he said. That's enough, OK?
42:29
Just be here and be happy with this on the floor.
42:32
Like. You said.
42:36
That's enough. That's enough.
42:37
That is not enough. Grow and get here OK?
42:41
And then let me hold you watch. This for 35 days and you just
42:44
have to stay here. Like what even is this nest when
42:47
the baby is born, where do I go? I know when the nest ends and
42:52
the world starts. Like at this point.
42:54
No clue, that's insane. Figure it out.
42:58
Thank you, I honestly love. Useless fashion.
43:03
I do too. So when I found it, I was like,
43:04
I have to tell everybody thank you.
43:06
So watch. Someone's going to ask me and
43:08
I'm like, did you know? Did you know that baby pigeons?
43:13
They don't leave the nest for 35 days and their nest is basically
43:15
5 sticks. Period.
43:20
Yes. Right, I have one more Reddit
43:24
and this one was a Reddit relationship advice.
43:26
It said. I met my boyfriend's work wife
43:30
for the first time and I'm devastated.
43:32
Oh, I hate that. Phrase.
43:33
So much, she said. I have been with my boyfriend
43:37
for five years now and he's been at his current job for a few
43:40
years. We will call him Jake.
43:42
I've never met any of his Co workers until last night, but
43:45
there's one in particular who we will call Amy.
43:49
He sometimes does favors for her, fixing her car, going to
43:52
her house to fix stuff around her house, etcetera.
43:55
And I was never really concerned because he told me all of his Co
43:58
workers were a lot older than him.
44:00
However, one night while he was asleep his guy friend kept
44:03
blowing up his phone so I I answered to let him know that
44:06
Jake was sleeping and so was I. Anyways, before I put the phone
44:10
down, I noticed 5 unread text messages from Amy.
44:14
One of them said great Jake, not everyone thinks we're sleeping
44:17
together. Laughing emoji.
44:20
Laughing emoji. This.
44:21
Really concerned me. So the next day after Jake got
44:24
home from work, I asked about it.
44:26
Oh, you didn't wake him up? Oh, I would have write on site
44:32
at 2:00 AM. He said that both him and Amy
44:36
were late for work that morning, so everyone probably assumed it.
44:39
He told me it was just a joke. I thought it was a weirdly
44:42
unprofessional joke and expressed my discomfort.
44:45
He invited me to the bar with him and his coworkers that night
44:48
so that I can meet her and see that there was nothing to worry
44:50
about. It did not soothe my nerves at
44:53
all. Turns out Amy is not a lot older
44:57
than him. She's only three years older and
44:59
super pretty. OK, the entire.
45:03
Night. She was all over him, touching
45:05
him, leaning on him, putting her arms around him and even kissing
45:09
him on the cheek. What now?
45:11
And he acted like it was normal. They were.
45:14
Constantly teasing each other in that middle schooler who doesn't
45:17
know how to properly flirt kind of way.
45:20
She told me all about how she loves him like a brother and
45:23
also that she told me that she had sex with half of the other
45:26
Co workers. She said that she got out the
45:29
next morning off because she sent a Co worker nudes to get
45:32
him to cover for her. What?
45:35
Later on she started crying and sobbing at the bar with actual
45:40
tears because she's quote so lonely and wants someone to love
45:44
her and my boyfriend ended up having to comfort her.
45:47
I know exactly who this chick is, I'm just unsure what to say
45:51
or do. My boyfriend kept acting like
45:53
this was normal, like he wasn't doing anything wrong by
45:56
entertaining this behavior. I can't ask them to cut her off,
45:59
they're on the same unit and they have to work together.
46:01
I literally do not know what to do about this but I'm just
46:04
disgusted knowing that this has been going on all these years
46:07
he's been working with her. How do I set boundaries while
46:10
they're forced to be around each other all the time at work?
46:13
Well, you. Just set the damn boundary
46:16
because, I mean, the way I'm looking at it, I'm like, why are
46:19
we just letting Jake run around and encourage this?
46:23
That's the thing. He's encouraging this behavior.
46:25
Exactly. And so she's hanging on him and
46:27
kissing him on the cheek. I wish somebody would, OK,
46:33
because no excuse you, but the fact that you're just allowing
46:38
it is the problem. She's going to act how she acts
46:41
and I have no control over her, but you have control over you.
46:44
And you're supposed to be doing this together.
46:46
We're supposed to be in a partnership.
46:48
And so if it's just like, oh, she's like a friend, I'm like,
46:50
I, well, let me see one of your guy friends kiss you on the
46:53
cheek and lean on your shoulder. Then if that's the case, it's
46:56
like, I don't want you to try to act like this is normal because
46:59
it's not. It's not.
47:00
So just set a boundary. Exactly.
47:02
And if he doesn't want to, then you know where you stand.
47:05
There's so many people who want to try to force somebody to do
47:08
something versus you doing something.
47:11
If it's like, OK, this is what I would like.
47:13
And if they don't do that and you're like, OK, well, This is
47:16
why I would prefer if you do this.
47:19
And they're just like, Nah. And you're like, OK, cool.
47:21
I know where I stand. I can move on.
47:23
We're good. But you're just like, I'm just
47:25
going to stay here and be sad and I'm going to force them to
47:27
no. It's like, no, no, no.
47:30
Why would you do that to yourself?
47:31
You deserve better than that. And Amy?
47:36
Girl. Don't make me put the.
47:37
Pick me status on you. Come on now.
47:40
Come on now. But I don't like.
47:42
That like be a girl's girl, you see that he has a girlfriend and
47:46
she you're in front of her and you just met her and now you're
47:49
going overboard. Like even if you act like that
47:51
at work and you're going to do that in front of fake it in
47:54
front. Of me, I don't want to see it.
47:56
Something I just, I don't like any of that.
47:58
That makes me very uncomfortable.
47:59
Yeah, I'll my last one. Am I the asshole for telling my
48:06
friend's bride he recycled my vows?
48:12
I was the best man at my friend's wedding last weekend.
48:15
We go way back, been buddies since high school and did all
48:18
the stupid stuff together before adulthood.
48:20
His wife seems like a lovely person as well, but we didn't
48:23
know each other until much later on, so it really comes down to
48:26
him and me. About a month before the
48:28
wedding, we're at his bachelor party, buzzed off some beers,
48:32
scarfing down wings, singing awful karaoke, and somehow he
48:36
managed to ask me if I still had my wedding vow saved somewhere.
48:40
I said yeah, I probably do, and asked why.
48:42
He said he knows what he feels for his fiance but has trouble
48:45
putting it into words, so he wanted a little inspo for mine
48:49
because he remembered them being so good and OK.
48:52
I understood and could appreciate that weddings are
48:55
stressful. Plus, it was less than four
48:56
weeks out at that point, so it was last minute and he was
48:59
probably panicking. I pulled up my notes app,
49:02
scrolled down, found my vows to my wife, and handed him my phone
49:05
for him to look at them. I assumed he would use general
49:08
concepts, which would be fine. And that was that.
49:11
Fast forward to the wedding. Before the ceremony, I check in
49:14
with him and ask, is everything all right?
49:16
Especially the vows. He says yeah man, don't worry
49:18
about it. You're kidding.
49:22
Turns out I. Actually had a lot to worry
49:24
about. So then the big moment comes,
49:26
he's standing there with everyone watching and he starts
49:29
reciting his vows. At first I recognized that maybe
49:33
some phrasing was similar, but shrugged it off.
49:35
Then my whole lines word for word, pretty much verbatim
49:39
phrasing from my vows years ago. More and more they kept going.
49:43
There was a pit in my stomach and I couldn't just ignore it.
49:46
I didn't say anything aloud in the moment as I would never
49:48
interrupt mid vow, but afterwards I pulled his wife
49:52
aside quietly, fully prepared for however awkward it might be,
49:56
and told her the truth. That he literally used parts,
49:59
exact lines of my vows. I have no idea if he took a pic
50:04
of them on his phone or what. She froze up, and I mean I could
50:08
see the hurt sink in on the poor girl's face.
50:12
She's not leaving him or anything, but she is very very
50:15
pissed to put it lightly. He claims he didn't realize he
50:18
copied them. He must have been subconscious,
50:21
like reading them made them stick in his mind.
50:23
And somehow that reflected in his vows, right?
50:26
Yeah, because. That makes sense.
50:28
And then he goes, I owed him loyalty first, not her, and I
50:31
shouldn't have said anything, especially on that night.
50:34
I found it a bit hypocritical to mention loyalty as someone who
50:38
stood there marrying someone else, leading them to think
50:41
those words were all original from his heart.
50:43
Nope, no, I'm glad you told her, actually.
50:48
She deserves to know. But are you?
50:50
But are you kidding? Your mother?
50:54
That's insane. This is almost as bad as if he
50:57
used like Chad GBT or whatever. Write your vows.
50:59
It's giving that you know what I mean.
51:01
Like, what do you mean? You can't put it into words?
51:03
Even if you're the most the most illiterate person I've ever
51:06
heard in my life and you're like, I love you, babe.
51:08
At least that came from your heart.
51:10
True, very true. But you're over here copying
51:12
your friend's vows. That's word for word, and I know
51:15
both of those weddings were recorded too.
51:16
So how about you play it back? Yeah, play it back.
51:20
I want to see them side by side by side.
51:24
Listen, I think there's many assholes in this story.
51:27
I think that the new husband is the asshole for stealing the
51:29
vows because yes, you should have written something from your
51:33
heart to your wife. She knows who you are.
51:35
She knows you're not some, you know, word scholar.
51:37
So just say the words that you feel right.
51:40
Just start writing them down. But I also think the OP is kind
51:43
of an asshole because why would you tell the bride on her
51:46
wedding day? Yeah, he could.
51:47
Have He could have. He could have waited.
51:49
Yeah, you're right. He could have waited.
51:51
The messy part of me is like, yeah, I'm.
51:53
Saying, why would you do it that day?
51:59
You could have waited. She has got on her white dress.
52:01
She is partying. She's probably a little tipsy.
52:03
And you just told her that her husband lied to her on the
52:06
stage, you know, in the church in front of everybody that she
52:09
loves. Like that's just.
52:10
That's a good point. That's a good point.
52:12
Or or you could have talked to your friend.
52:16
True. That's true, but I feel like.
52:19
She deserves to know that her husband did not spend the time
52:24
or care enough to write his own vows.
52:27
True. This is the day you guys are
52:29
joined together. You know what I mean?
52:31
And your vows are very important.
52:32
People really remember them. And you know what I mean?
52:35
Like they're important. So why don't you take the time
52:37
and put the effort into it? If you even if you sat at a
52:40
blank page and stared at your screen for hours trying to
52:43
figure it out, that's still a lot of effort.
52:45
Yeah. And that shows.
52:47
You know what I mean? 100% so no one's asking you to
52:49
be all poetic and everything, but just try.
52:53
And he just didn't. He did.
52:54
Not so, I mean it was subconscious when he read the
52:58
good vows. Oh my God.
53:01
Okay, I didn't. I wish it worked that way.
53:03
Yeah, I didn't know you had that type of memory, bro.
53:05
Just recite everything you've ever read then.
53:08
Oh my goodness. Yeah, I know, I know.
53:10
So there's it's like partial assholeness for me.
53:14
Partial. Yeah, that's a good one.
53:19
All right. Y'all, we're nearing the.
53:20
End of the episode, but before you go, head over to Patreon
53:25
because we're continuing the discussion with all of our
53:29
pearls on clutched and all of. Taking the.
53:33
Shoes off OK and all the drama is released OK T is being
53:37
spilled, so head over to Patreon for the extended episode.
53:41
Thank you for joining us today though, we love y'all.
53:44
See ya. Bye.