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Ep. 50 - Does God Raise Up Assassins? · Martyr's Row

0:00
This week on Martyrs Row, was Pope Zachary from
0:03
Galifianachia? Is there a club for unaware people?
0:07
Was Oatmeal a person in the Bible? Is Ehud one
0:11
of the original Blues Brothers? Beware the left
0:14
-handed man! What? Three, two, one! Saint Valentine,
0:40
a presbyter at Rome, suffered in the days of
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Claudius the Emperor when the confession of Christ
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was counted a crime. Being apprehended for aiding
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the faithful and strengthening them in the faith,
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he was brought before the judge and urged to
0:56
renounce his Lord. But he answered that Christ
0:59
alone is the true and everlasting King. For this,
1:04
he was beaten and cast into prison. Tradition
1:08
sayeth that even there he bore witness by charity
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and prayer, bringing comfort to those around
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him. At length he was led forth upon the Flaminian
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Way and beheaded for the name of Jesus. Thus
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Valentine, remembered by many for earthly affection,
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gave the greater testimony of heavenly love,
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proving that true devotion endureth even unto
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death. Anno Domini 269. Beware the Ides of March.
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For we have arrived at the Ides of March. Beware
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it. I'm not sure about ghosts. I don't know what
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the Ides sounded like. Yeah. It just sounded
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ghastly. Do you know what that's from? I don't,
2:09
but it sounds familiar. Have you heard it at
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all? I feel like I've heard it. I love the idea
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that you don't know anything that I'm talking
2:16
about. But I know I've heard that somewhere.
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Oh, okay. So, Ides of March. Do you know what...
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Do you know what that means? What are your thoughts
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on what that is? I would love for you to just
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decide. Just make up, what do you think it is?
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So the Ides of March. I could go funny with it.
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No, so honestly what I think of when I hear that
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is like the beginning of it. It sounds like we're
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leading into spring. We're not quite at spring
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yet. And so March has this kind of thing with
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it where it could either be just terrible, terrible
3:01
weather or it could be kind of nice. Okay. So
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the eyes where it's like beware because you don't
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know what to expect. Right. So what does it actually
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mean? So it is like that line is famously from
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the Shakespeare play Julius Caesar. Oh, that's
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where I've heard it. Okay. Yeah. Because I have
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that book at home. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And I got
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it got me thinking about it because I heard this.
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Do you know the whole like there's like all these
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conspiracies around Shakespeare and like who
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he was? Yeah. Yeah. Because people don't really
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know if he was an actual guy. And then aren't
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they like it was actually like a middle aged
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woman now. Oh, I mean, I think that could be
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anything I heard. Yeah. Well, one of the big
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ones is like Francis Sir Francis Bacon. Yeah.
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Yeah. Which is an interesting. The grandfather
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of Kevin Bacon, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Without
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question. Obviously. I don't even have to look
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it up. I don't even know why you had to say that.
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But yeah, because the philosopher being able
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to have this artistic side, I don't know. Anyways.
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But yeah, so the Ides of March is the 15th of
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March. Oh, okay. And Ides means the middle point,
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the midpoint. Ah. So it's the middle point of
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a month and typically the midpoint would be like
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the 13th. Okay. But in a couple of different...
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months, it's the 15th. Interesting. So the midpoint
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of - I wanna do that every month now. March is,
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yeah. But the reason why that line comes up in
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Julius Caesar is because that's when he was assassinated.
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Oh, I see. Was on March 15th. Okay. So that's
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where Beware the Ides of March is a warning.
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So if your name's Julius, March 15th's not a
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good day. Yeah, he was assassinated on March
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15th, 44 BC. Dang. So that's where that comes
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from, is beware the Ides of March, that was a
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warning to him. And the word is commonly explained
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as connected to the idea of dividing the month,
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because early Roman dating was tied to lunar
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phases, with the Ides associated with the full
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moon around mid -month. So it's like beware the
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full moon of the middle of the month. Which,
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fair. You know. I'd be wearing it. Yeah. Well,
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and one of the things I thought about was, I
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don't know why I thought of that in the sense
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of, well, we're in the middle of March, but that's
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why I thought of it. But I also was thinking,
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is there any like liturgical pieces to it? Like,
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is there anything liturgically tied to it? And
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realistically, because it's from like, So Shakespeare
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is obviously not first century. Yeah. It's like
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1500s, right? Sounds about right somewhere in
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there. Medieval times. But he, like, referencing
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that Julius Caesar in 44 BC, just thinking about,
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like, I wonder if the Ides of March had something
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to do with the early church or anything like
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that. And it doesn't. No connection. No connection,
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but technically this is kind of a middle point
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in Lent. Oh yeah. So we're kind of in the middle
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of the Lenten season. Yeah, yeah. And so like
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leading up, so like that's why there's some association
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a little bit with different saints. Oh I can
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see that. But it's like kind of a loose association.
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Just so happened to be. Yeah. It's not really,
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because the Ides of March typically falls on
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the third Sunday of Lent. Oh, okay. Or in 2026
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it does. So, yeah, but. Yeah, I would be curious
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to see if there were any saints that were weary
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of the Ides of March. I don't think so. In the
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Roman Catholic tradition. They're like, oh, St.
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Ides, yes, of course. Well, so in the Roman Catholic
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tradition, March 15th is commonly associated
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with saints commemorated, saints commemorated
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that day. For example, Clement Mary Hoffbauer
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and Pope Zachary. So. Two very different names.
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Yeah, Pope Zachary. Pope Zachary Galifianakis.
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Hey, Pope Zach. Zach Galifianakis. Pope Zachary
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of Galifianakia. That would be awesome. I loved
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ferns. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you look at the
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liturgical calendar, but also the Roman Catholic
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calendar, there are saints associated with almost
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every day. Yes, yeah. So that's where it's like,
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well, March 15th is associated with a couple
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of different saints. Okay. Particularly, March
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15th is associated, the Ides of March, with Pope
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Zachary, Galaphanachia. Particularly. So Mr.
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Pope Zachary of Galifianakia, beware the Ides
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of March. They are upon us. Here they are. Three,
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two, one. A tribute in his hand, but a question
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in his throat Does heaven write the order's history
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quotes? At the upper room where the curtains
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breathe A boring crown and nation beneath Was
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it vengeance? Was it mercy? To God raise up a
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judge or an assassin Left hand steady, blame
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of deliverance Whispers in the quiet of your
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providence Your kingdom's fall, is it murder?
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He's carved out by a wounded hand Left -hand
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study Plane of deliverance Judgment wrapped up
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in providence And God moves through the broken
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land Oh, who are we to un - So there's a lot
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of things that I'm unsure of, Paul. Join the
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club. Is there a club? If there is, I don't know.
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I'm not aware of it. We should make a club. I
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mean, it could be the Martyrs Row Club. The Unaware
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Club. The people who are unsure of a lot of things.
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That's good. Like one of the things that I think
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about is, you know, like, murder. Yeah, not sure
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about it. Well, it's weird that we have all these
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different names for it, depending on... What
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kind of murder? Well, and yes, there's all these
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subcategories, but then there's also different
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names and categories for, depending on if you're
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talking about the one who did the murder, or
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the one who was murdered. Yeah, that's fair.
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And then also, depending on who the person is,
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it might be called something different. And then
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depending on who the person that murdered is,
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It could also be called something different.
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Like, for instance, if there's a guy who murders
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another guy, but the guy who murders the other
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guy, is this weird to talk about? Is like a government
12:16
official, then the consequences are completely
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different. Yes, absolutely. Or they're the same,
12:24
depending on what Congress decides. Like today
12:31
you will get Yeah, well or like depending on
12:35
how redacted the the protocol was It's like it's
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like was should we even be talking about this
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right now or like there's a lot of murdering
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that happens which again, it's just weird that
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we that it's like it's something that We have
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all these categories for what people are called
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and for who they are because of how much actual
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destruction of humanity there is. Yes, yeah.
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You know what I mean? Yeah. But the idea of,
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which at some point we've got to do an episode
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on this and this is not where I'm going with
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it, but the concept of just war, which is Augustinian,
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isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, that sounds right. We'll
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have to get into it at some point. Yeah, but
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we'll find out for sure when we get into it,
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but it's like that idea of like It's like if
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you can if you could kill One person to save
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a thousand. Yeah Then is it worth killing the
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one person like does the you know, and I think
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that I mean that's the trolley car Dilemma, right
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the trolley car. Yeah Yeah, so maybe we should
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do an episode on murder Is that what we're talking
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about? Is this a True Crime podcast? On Amazon
13:56
Crime. True Prime on Amazon Crime. Oh, that's
14:01
a... That's actually pretty interesting. This
14:04
season on True Prime on Amazon Crime. Wait. Coming
14:10
to you live from 30 Blondes mixed with 10 German
14:16
guys. Amazon crime for your Amazon prime. Would
14:23
you pull the lever? Would you pull the lever?
14:28
So, as we do on Martyrs Row, getting back to
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the Bible. Oh, is that what we're talking about?
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Yeah, yeah. My question for you tonight is, why
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would God raise up an assassin? Like from a baby?
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I mean, I suppose. All were once. That's true.
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All were once. What is baby? That is one thing
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I have realized. It seems like every adult, what
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is baby? And the Daily Double is all were once.
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Ding, ding, ding. What is baby? What is? 500
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points. Who wasn't once? What is Adam? Or maybe?
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What? It is funny to think about, particularly
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the last couple of episodes that we've talked
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through, the idea that Adam potentially was like
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an actual baby that like sprouted in the garden.
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I guess not really sprout is like, you know,
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you know God formed him but yeah, but sprouted
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in the garden and He makes him at first he's
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into babies like turn over Or sprout will not
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stop crying sprouted in Eden and then like what?
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Around him took care of him and or God fully.
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Yeah, you know what I mean? Probably some she
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wolves Beautiful. I mean, but that's the thing
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is like is it like Mowgli and Baloo is like that
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the... Which would be kind of interesting. I
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mean the creatures were created before man. Yeah,
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yeah. So probably the creatures, the beasts of
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the field. But anyways, does God raise up assassins?
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Yeah. And maybe based on the way we set that
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up, what's an assassin? Yeah, those are great
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questions. Thanks. Thanks, I thought of it myself.
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I did my brain up here. Yeah, well I guess the
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first question would be like, okay, what's an
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assassin? Yeah, I asked that one. Yeah, you did.
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I mean that's the first one we're gonna touch
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on. I like that, yeah, yeah. Which actually is
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an interesting question, because I'll be honest,
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I don't think I've ever really necessarily thought
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about that. Okay. Do you know what it is? But
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like whenever we think of, whenever I think of,
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let me not put this on everybody else. Games?
17:07
Whenever everyone in the world thinks about an
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assassin. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, Assassin's Creed
17:12
comes to mind first. Yeah. And it's like the
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idea of, all right, someone has a mission to
17:16
kill somebody else. Sure. And they do it sneakily.
17:19
Yeah. So sneaky guys are assassins? Yes. It's
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kind of like a hit man, but like sneaky. So assassins,
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do you know this? Maybe I'll answer this one
17:29
for you. Yeah, because I actually don't know
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if I have a Okay. Dictionary definition for you.
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So, assassins are people who murder, murder.
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Murder. Assassins are people who murder political
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figures or people of prominence. Oh, okay, interesting.
17:48
Yeah, so it's based on who is being killed. So
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it's a specific type of person. Correct. Okay.
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And typically, an assassin is assigned. Yes.
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So like... If you were gonna fall under like
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what is an assassin typically it's someone who
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is Killed a higher like someone has commissioned
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this person to kill a person of political importance,
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okay? Yeah, that actually checks out yeah, yeah
18:16
good job. That's why that's why they call like
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like that's why even retroactively There are
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certain things like like with Charlie Kirk. Mm
18:26
-hmm. They call that an assassination because
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he was a prominent figure. Yeah, he was a prominent
18:31
political figure. Yes. Even though he wasn't
18:34
technically a politician in the traditional sense
18:38
of office. But he was in a political space. And
18:42
he was a politician, just not like he meaning
18:47
like there's a difference between someone who
18:49
is a politician that is that people vote for
18:53
to be that. Yeah. And then someone who is influencing
18:59
politics. I see. So, you know what I mean? Yes.
19:03
So, but both people are politicians. Yeah, because
19:07
they work in politics. Yeah. Yeah. Which that
19:12
makes sense, yeah. Sure. Yeah, so with that,
19:15
even that idea in mind, so the question of did
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God raise up an assassin, so did God raise up
19:22
a person to kill another prominent political
19:26
figure? Yeah, that's why I'm asking. Yeah, which
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is a I was reframing it with that new Like yes,
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this is literally what I've been saying Yeah,
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which is it's an interesting way to think about
19:37
it when you yeah when you look at it that way
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because it's like God is raising up an individual
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and typically Like within wartime settings. Yeah
19:46
You I mean we talked about this a little bit
19:48
with Goliath. Hmm and the idea that like It's
19:53
like their biggest guy versus our biggest guy.
19:55
Yeah Well, an assassin would be hired to kill
19:58
the biggest guy before the battle ever starts.
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Yes. Or to kill them in the midst of the battle
20:03
because they're not out on the battlefield. Yeah.
20:06
So that's where, that's where you, you kind of
20:09
get like typically - Basically we need this guy
20:11
out. Yes. Just get him out. So that things don't
20:16
escalate. Yeah. Or so that like everything ends.
20:22
Yes. It's like cutting off the head. Yeah, which
20:26
I mean it's it works. Yeah, it does and it's
20:30
always interesting. So I'll say this too And
20:33
the idea of like you had it god raise that raise
20:35
up someone to do that I feel like the knee -jerk
20:40
answer would be like, oh, no, of course not and
20:43
the reason I say that is because we think of
20:45
like bigger figures like David for example who
20:50
it's like, oh he was given the chance to in essence,
20:54
be an assassin. Oh, right. But then he's like,
20:56
no, I'm actually not going to do that. Yeah,
20:58
true. And so we're like, oh, so that's the character
21:01
of God. Yeah. Or that's what he that's what God
21:04
approves of. Yeah. But then we come to a certain
21:10
spot in the Old Testament. OK. Where it's like,
21:13
actually, the opposite seems to be true. Yeah,
21:16
I guess it depends on when you're talking about.
21:19
Yeah, that's fair. Because the further along
21:21
you go, it seems to adjust to what the actual
21:25
goal of Yahweh is. Yes, yeah. Not that his changes,
21:29
it just like, he's like holding our hand along
21:32
the way. Yeah, how he's doing things changes.
21:35
Yeah, well, no, how we're doing things changes
21:40
towards him. Yeah, that's true. And he allows
21:42
for it to, yeah. Yeah, and it's important to
21:47
say, I guess, Because even then it's like so
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that's in the the era of the Kings with David,
21:54
right? Yeah Yeah, and so the way the political
21:57
landscape is is different than earlier when it
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was the judges Mm -hmm. Yeah, and earlier than
22:03
that. It was different. Yeah, and so Yeah, how
22:07
how what God was asking people to do was different?
22:10
Yeah. Yeah, they're sure very different But yeah,
22:14
so I it in that question. I think of one guy
22:17
in particular, okay who I actually would go ahead
22:21
and say is probably like one of the most underrated
22:23
characters in the Bible. Okay, I feel like there's
22:26
a lot of those. There are a lot of them. We could
22:28
actually just do a whole year of podcasts on
22:30
those guys. Yeah, it is fun to go like character
22:35
by character. Yeah, it is kind of fun. Yeah.
22:38
But this guy's like, I hear like almost nobody
22:42
ever talk about him. Okay. But. He was actually
22:46
one of the most, he had one of the most significant
22:48
impacts on Israel. Okay. And so his name was
22:53
Ehud. Oh you gave it away. I did. I'm glad because
22:56
I wasn't sure. Oh you didn't know. And so he
23:01
was actually the second judge. Okay. During the
23:05
era of the judges. Yeah. Right after Othniel.
23:08
Oatmeal. Or as I lovingly call them oatmeal.
23:11
Oatmeal. That's the only way I can think of it.
23:13
It's just so unnatural. Oatmeal. It's like oatmeal.
23:16
But there's not like a word that I regularly
23:18
say that makes that sound. Yeah. That has those
23:22
like vowels against those whatever the next consonants.
23:27
I wonder what his parents were thinking. Well
23:29
they were Hebrew. Yeah. Actually they weren't
23:32
Hebrew. They were Hebrew. Oatmeal. Yeah. Oatmeal
23:35
I think was a... from the tribe of Judah. So
23:40
yeah, they would have been very Hebrew. Yeah.
23:44
About as much. Yeah. Like the heart of the Hebrews.
23:49
Well, so a lot of people probably like, who is
23:54
Yehud? What's this guy? Yeah. It's like, OK,
23:56
so it's another name in the Bible. Yeah. So.
23:59
But wait, I've been nerding out about this recently.
24:03
Yes. So like when you bring up Ehud and the idea
24:06
of, which I don't think I've ever said his name
24:08
like that before, but I like it. How do you like
24:10
to say it? Ehud. Ehud. Ehud. Ehud. Ehud. It's
24:18
a sound? And then my boy, Ehud. Onomatopoeia?
24:22
Yeah. Ehud. That's a lot closer. That sounds
24:28
like what your foot sounds like when you step
24:30
in the snow. I know, but that's more Hebrew sounding.
24:34
Yeah, it actually is. Really crunchy snow. Yeah,
24:38
his name is an onomatopoeia. Sir, our boy, country
24:40
snow, onomatopoeia. But, so let me do like a
24:43
30 second, like, what are the judges? Yeah, yeah,
24:46
please. You talked about David and then the kings,
24:48
and so it's like, it's actually kind of a simple
24:51
piece where you have Moses or like Joseph Goes
24:56
down to Egypt and then this is like the one -minute
24:59
version not 32nd version. Just it goes on to
25:02
Egypt all this stuff happens and then generations
25:06
Israelites in Egypt and then Moses The first
25:12
generations getting killed Moses gets sent up
25:14
the stream to Pharaoh's house and then Somehow
25:18
through the providence of God Moses his mom actually
25:20
gets to raise him in the palace with Pharaoh,
25:24
which is pretty cool. And then you have Moses,
25:29
who God uses as a leader to deliver the children
25:32
of Israel out of Egypt and then into the promised
25:36
land, except for, hang on a minute, because they
25:39
get up to the promised land and they go in and
25:43
they're like, oh, there's massive giants in this
25:45
land. We surely will die. And also the fruit
25:49
is huge. Massive. Which sounds awesome. And then
25:52
there's a guy, Joshua. Oh, he reminds me of Honey,
25:55
I Shrunk the Kids. I know, yeah. It has always
25:57
been a dream. And also modern, a little bit newer,
26:02
Cloudy with Gents and Meatballs. Oh, yeah. Not
26:06
a Disney movie. That's true. I did it. Is that
26:11
DreamWorks? I think so. Okay. Yeah, DreamWork
26:15
makes the team work. Had to. It's backwards,
26:21
but if you're like, that's not quite it's backwards,
26:23
but it makes sense Yeah, so so then you get Joshua
26:28
who is one of the twelve spies that goes in He's
26:31
like no we can take it I mean God said we could
26:33
and then the intent of them are like no we can't
26:37
and so They have to go live in the desert for
26:40
40 years Yeah, because they were disobedient
26:43
and trusting God that he would deliver the land
26:46
to them. So that generation dies off because
26:50
they were disobedient and did not believe what
26:53
God said. And so Moses also doesn't get to, because
26:58
he struck the rock the second time where he was
27:04
basically creating a religious formula out of
27:08
something that God had previously said. So God
27:11
previously said, strike the rock, the water will
27:13
come out. the next time they need water, he says,
27:16
do something different, and Moses goes, yes,
27:20
and so Moses goes, all right, well, last time
27:22
I struck the rock, even though you said speak
27:24
to the rock, I'm gonna strike the rock, and he's
27:27
like, well, now you don't get to go to the promised
27:29
land. Yeah. Darn it. If only you would listen.
27:37
Listen and speak. To be fair, Moses said he couldn't
27:40
speak well. Which honestly is it be it be actually
27:44
interesting to do an episode on that? Yeah, because
27:46
it's kind of one of those this is totally have
27:48
we not already done an episode on that No, I
27:51
don't think we have on on spells. I know on spells.
27:55
I'm talking about Moses. That's who I'm talking
27:57
about Yeah, and him speaking. Yeah spells spells
28:00
like that Like the child's toy No speaking spell
28:06
incantations. Oh, no, that's not what I mean
28:08
by that like him not being able to speak well
28:10
But that's why. Because of spells? Yes. We will
28:15
talk about that. I was going to go a different
28:18
direction with it, but... Yeah, because that's
28:21
what he understood the prophets were. Yeah. That
28:24
they needed to be able to perfectly say incantations
28:27
in order for God to be able to do things. Oh,
28:29
yeah, yeah. No, no, no. So what I was going with,
28:31
the direction I was taking, yeah. Okay. which
28:32
that's an interesting direction too. It's interesting,
28:37
I can't speak well. This is no longer a 30 second
28:40
version. No, it's because I interrupted. No,
28:43
no, no. Or a one minute version. Well, I also
28:45
went back to Joseph when I was talking about
28:47
Moses. Yeah, that's true. My bad. No, because
28:51
he's raised in Pharaoh's house. Right. And so
28:55
he would have learned how to speak and to speak
28:59
well. Because he would have had to give speeches
29:03
and talk to people. It's like there's a certain
29:05
decor meaning to do as royalty. But even more
29:08
so is why he couldn't. Well that's what's interesting
29:12
about it is because then he spends all this time
29:14
in the desert not talking to anybody. Oh you're
29:17
saying he lost it? Yeah, or at least he had fear
29:20
of it. That's kind of my theory that I've been
29:23
playing with for a little bit. And it's kind
29:27
of funny because for him to be like, oh, well,
29:28
God, I can't speak well. And he's like, well,
29:31
no, you could. Okay, we'll write this down. This
29:35
is a future episode. Yeah, this is a good future
29:36
episode. Yeah, because I have a whole opposite
29:38
view of that. I love it. I love it. Okay, so
29:42
we have Moses dies on the edge and he says, and
29:48
then Moses died, which somehow he wrote that
29:50
also. That's a whole other episode. And then
29:53
Moses died. There's like extra vowels in there.
29:59
We get it. Yeah. And also if you're listening
30:03
to this, you're like, what are you talking about?
30:06
Read the Bible. Read the Bible. Yeah, it's crazy.
30:09
Crazy book. The line just kind of keeps going.
30:11
Yeah. I don't know why they translate it. This
30:13
is actual like death note. It's crazy. The tablet
30:16
that he was carrying. It's just one giant claw
30:19
mark. Yeah, he didn't get to go over and see
30:21
it, but whole other yeah, so anyway, so so Joshua
30:25
leads the children of Israel into the land of
30:29
Canaan and then the 12 tribes spread out and
30:32
they set the borders of Israel it's no longer
30:36
the land of Canaan is now Israel and in the process
30:41
of doing that Joshua is the the de facto leader
30:46
of the 12 tribes. But every tribe has military
30:50
leaders and they have all of their own stuff
30:53
going on in the tribes. But Joshua was the one
30:56
who united the whole thing. And Joshua wasn't
30:59
a king. He was just a leader. He was just the
31:02
central figure. And his king, the king, was Yahweh.
31:07
So the king of Israel at that time was actually
31:12
Yahweh. And then During the and that functioned
31:18
well until Joshua dies Yeah, and then once Joshua
31:23
dies the way that judges opens up is basically
31:25
it's like it's like in a galaxy far far away
31:29
No, it's like in a in a in a place that's technically
31:34
That's true It is now It's it's like in this
31:41
in this In this, uh, chosen people that once
31:46
had a king that was God creator himself, um,
31:51
they ran away and went after other gods. And
31:55
so, so God raises up judges and it's a, the judges
32:00
are a mix between like a king who was like a
32:04
military leader and also prophets who were strictly
32:08
spiritual leaders. So typically during the period
32:11
of the judges, there would be a judge who would
32:14
function sometimes as a military leader and also
32:17
be speaking and delivering words directly from
32:20
God. Yes. But then you have somebody like Deborah,
32:22
who's like a famous like a common name when it
32:27
comes to the judges. Yeah. Because she was a
32:30
woman. So I think that that stands out. Yeah.
32:32
Yeah. And but so she actually wasn't the military
32:37
leader. She was more like a prophetess. And is
32:40
that how you say that? Prophetess. And she linked
32:46
up with military leaders and told them what the
32:50
Lord said that he would do in order to protect
32:54
Israel. So that's where the period of the judges
32:57
comes in. It's before the kings. It's before,
33:01
like basically during the period of the judges,
33:03
it's like they see the other nations that have
33:08
kings and they like what's going on there, so
33:11
the kids, the children of Israel, the kids of
33:14
Israel, they start to serve and like all this
33:18
other stuff. They come under the oppression of
33:21
these other kings, and then they cry out to God,
33:25
God delivers them, and then sets - They get to
33:28
do it all over, yeah. Yeah, and then he raises
33:29
up judges. Yeah. And then eventually the kids
33:33
of Israel are like, they're like, God, we want
33:36
a king like everybody else. Yeah. And God's like,
33:39
no, you don't. And they're like, yeah, we actually
33:42
do. They're like, fine. I'll give you this terrible
33:45
guy I saw. Yeah, check this out. And he looks
33:48
like every other king. But he's the worst. And
33:52
you'll find out why. Kinda sucks. He doesn't
33:54
even go here. That's awesome. So in the period
34:00
of the judges, the first judge is Oath Neal.
34:02
Yes. And then you get the second judge, Ehud.
34:05
Yeah, and actually can I say real quick to you?
34:12
No, I mean that's the debate of like to learn
34:16
That's the debate of like if someone's name includes
34:20
the pronunciation is it more rude to say the
34:23
pronunciation Oh, yeah, or not say it. Yeah,
34:26
that's fair, and I think it depends on the person
34:28
Yeah, what do they prefer? Yeah, yeah But it
34:32
is interesting, because we've talked about this
34:34
on the timeline of it, where it's like, so God
34:38
created everything, and he said, hey man, I want
34:40
you guys to be in charge of this. Hey man. Hey
34:44
man. And then we kind of screwed it up. And then
34:47
he's like, OK, you guys are really making a mess
34:49
of this. I'm going to put some of my guys to
34:54
help you out. True. And then they made a mess.
34:57
Yeah. And then he's like, okay, check this out.
35:00
I'm gonna do it, but I'm gonna do it through
35:03
man who I originally wanted to do this through
35:05
anyway. And then man's like, we don't like it
35:09
anymore. He's like, okay, you can have whatever
35:12
everyone else has, but I'm gonna still keep my
35:14
boots on the ground too. And then that just ends
35:17
up turning this whole thing where he's like,
35:18
you know what, let me just go down and do it
35:19
myself. Which is kind of amazing. But yeah, so
35:25
we're in that period of God's like, hey, I'm
35:27
in charge. And these are my people that I want
35:31
them to be leading this, but they're following
35:35
me. Yeah, so the kids of Israel, I like calling
35:39
them that. They're like, oh, I like what these
35:42
other nations are doing. Let's do that. And then
35:45
the Lord hands them over, it says, to those other
35:50
nations. And then they get ruled over and they're
35:52
oppressed by these other nations because they're
35:54
not part of the other nations. Right, and then
35:57
they cry out to God and God it says that God
35:59
raises up a judge Yeah, so I guess that does
36:02
make sense like to raise up it's basically to
36:07
call out somebody and to bring them into this
36:10
position to be able to deliver Be the the human
36:14
actor that delivers Or that brings the deliverance
36:18
of God on the earth. Yes Yes Well yeah, so that's
36:25
where we pick up, and I'm trying to remember,
36:27
because oatmeal, is that what I call them? Oath
36:30
-niel. Oath -niel. Oath -niel. Oath -niel. That
36:35
sounds, yeah. Probably closer. Oath -niel. Oath
36:38
-niel. That's more Nordic. If you just clear
36:41
your throat every time you say it. Just have
36:44
a sinus infection. Oh, I didn't know you spoke
36:47
Hebrew. Now I'm just a little clogged up. Pronunciation
36:54
is amazing. The piece that he led I believe was
37:02
40 years? Does that sound right? Oathnew? Yeah.
37:05
Yes. Yeah, 40 years. So this is after that 40
37:10
years. Yeah. And then it says in Judges 3 that...
37:15
All right, so now Israel started doing again
37:17
what was evil in the sight of the Lord. And then
37:20
so God turned them over to the King of Moab,
37:25
which I can't remember his name right now. King
37:28
Moab? King Moab. He probably had a beard. He
37:33
sounds like he has a beard. For sure. He's also
37:36
a pretty big boy, as we'll get to. Oh yeah, then
37:40
he may not have had a beard. You think he shaved?
37:44
I don't know, maybe if you're really overweight,
37:46
you can't grow hair. I don't know. I figured
37:52
he would, because if he could grow any, he's
37:54
just like, oh, it's too much work today. Yeah,
37:56
I mean, he could be right. But, you know, who's
37:58
to say? But he still did some damage. So he collected
38:02
an army with the Emirates in the Amalekites.
38:06
And then he went over and took over Israel. And
38:10
then they were Israel under his oppression for
38:13
18 years. And then that's where we see, starting
38:18
in verse 15, it says, then the people of Israel
38:21
cried out to the Lord, and the Lord raised up
38:23
for them a deliverer. He doesn't call him an
38:27
assassin or anything, he says he's a deliverer.
38:30
Which is a much kinder word to use. So that's
38:32
kind of an answer to the question. But kind of.
38:36
But kind of, yeah. and his name was the son of
38:44
Jera the benjaminite a left -handed man oh yeah
38:48
which is fascinating yeah yeah um and i so i've
38:52
heard i've heard a lot of people say different
38:54
things it's like oh well which we'll get into
38:57
the story but okay spoil it a little bit yeah
39:00
yeah should i spoil it a little else you can't
39:02
i'll spoil it yeah yeah um where, so what he
39:06
does is he goes, they collect a tribute, then
39:12
he goes to deliver it to the king of Moab, and
39:15
he also creates a dagger, he says it's one cubit
39:19
long, and he hides that on his right thigh. And
39:24
now most people still are, to this day, right
39:27
handed. And so, when they went up to go give
39:32
the tribute, they would have checked his other
39:33
side. They're like, oh, he's probably right -handed.
39:36
Oh, he's clean. So then he goes in and then he
39:40
ends up stabbing the portly king of Moab. Yeah,
39:44
I mean, that's the whole thing. And gets away
39:45
with it. Yeah, he sneaks out. They're like, yeah,
39:49
that's it. So it's interesting. I've heard when
39:52
people talk about this, they'll say that... The
39:57
interesting thing about him being left handed
39:59
is because that's how he was able to basically
40:01
trick and bring a weapon in and kill the king.
40:04
Which is like, yeah, that could be. But there's
40:07
also something else going on in here which I
40:09
find interesting. First off, it's with the tribe
40:15
of Benjamin. So I don't know if you probably
40:19
know this. Maybe you don't. I don't know, see.
40:21
I don't know, I'll just say that. I don't know,
40:23
see. Let's find out. I don't know, yes. Do you
40:26
know what Benjamin means? I don't. Okay, this
40:30
is me. I love names. Etymology. I love names.
40:33
Paul and his etymology. Paul the etymologist,
40:36
that's what they call me. Can you be that? I
40:40
don't know. As a profession, because you should
40:42
look into it. I should. What does etymology mean?
40:45
I am so glad you asked. So it literally means
40:51
son of my right hand. Oh. Which is fascinating.
40:55
It is. Because, so, and then we have the phrase
40:59
translated, he's a left handed man. So it's like,
41:02
okay, but he's from the tribe of. Benjamin. Yeah,
41:06
which is. Son of my right hand. Son of my right
41:07
hand. It's like, that's interesting. Tricked
41:09
ya. But on top of that, the phrase here that's
41:13
translated left -handed man is a Hebrew idiom
41:17
that translates to a man bound restricted in
41:21
his right hand. So it's like, oh, well that's
41:25
interesting. So we also see the same phrase one
41:30
other time, which is in Judges 2016, and that's
41:34
to describe the 700 slingers. That's what I was
41:36
gonna look up. Yeah, which they're also from
41:38
the tribe of Benjamin. Oh, I didn't oh, yeah,
41:41
okay. Yeah, so it's kind of it's kind of interesting
41:43
that Because there's another word or phrase that's
41:46
used. Yeah, I think it's like 54 times in the
41:49
Old Testament Okay, that's referred to left -handed
41:52
people are turning to your left. Okay, which
41:54
is a different word than this used here These
41:56
are the only two times we see that in Scripture
41:58
gotcha this idioms used. Okay and so it's interesting
42:03
so some translators speculate that Benjaminites
42:06
purposely trained several of their young men
42:09
to be left -handed for military advantages. Yeah,
42:12
in order to throw off the, like these are the
42:14
right -handed guys. And there's also the idea
42:16
that if you were left -handed, you would have
42:19
an advantage, like attacking like a city gate.
42:22
I wonder, does that mean that they actually bound
42:24
their right hand so that by physical appearance,
42:26
it looks like the right -handed guys, they would
42:29
look at their right hand and go, oh, that guy's
42:32
deformed in his right hand. No, I think it was...
42:35
If his hand is bound? I think it was only bound
42:38
when they were young, so they'd be forced to
42:40
use their left hand and become left hand dominant.
42:43
Oh, so not like... Not like it was tied or cut
42:47
off. Not like the way the Chinese used to put
42:49
their feet in wooden clogs. Right. But it's one
42:52
that's like they probably... Did I just blend
42:53
cultures? You did, okay. But I allow it. Foot
42:58
binding, that's what I'm thinking. Yes, foot
43:00
binding. Because I'm thinking of foot binding
43:01
like they actually restrict the growth of the...
43:03
Oh, I see. From what I've seen, I don't think
43:07
so. I think it was when they were training or
43:09
when they were young. It's like you can't use
43:11
your right hand, so you're forced to use your
43:12
left. Wow. And then it's like, oh you can use
43:15
your right now, but you like using your left,
43:17
don't you? Imagine you're raising kids and you're
43:20
like, okay, come on. That one's gonna be left
43:22
-handed. Yeah, and you're like, look, all right,
43:25
not only do you have to learn to read and write
43:28
and to eat your vegetables, but you can't use
43:32
your right hand. But I want to. But it works.
43:35
No, it does not. Not anymore. Your right hand
43:40
does not work. Get me my twine. Yikes, Dad. OK,
43:46
fine. Easy now. Do they have pockets? Like, could
43:49
he at least, could they at least put it in their
43:51
pocket? Slip it in his pocket. But that Judges
43:55
20 passage. Yeah. Have you read that? I. Here,
43:59
let me see. Yeah, pull it up. That's actually
44:02
an interesting passage. It says, judges 2016,
44:07
among all these were 700 chosen men who were
44:09
left handed. Everyone could sling a stone at
44:13
a hare and not miss it. So there's 700 Benjamites
44:19
later in judges who are all so skilled with a
44:24
sling that they can. throw it out of hair and
44:28
not miss the hair. Yeah, that's amazing. Yeah,
44:30
so then it kinda reframes our thought of King
44:34
David. Yeah. Once you get to it. Yeah. It's like
44:37
the precision was known. Which we've talked about,
44:42
we talked about that a little bit as well. Yeah.
44:44
Yeah. And a lot of that comes from there, that
44:46
Judges 20 passage. Yeah, the only reason like
44:48
that started dying out was because it was so
44:51
hard to train and master it. So when like the
44:54
bow and arrow became a little bit better. Yeah.
44:58
Even though it was still inferior to a skilled
45:01
slinger. Yeah, a slingshotist. A slingshotist.
45:05
That's what I like to say. But yeah, so outside
45:12
of those things, we're not really told like a
45:13
lot about... Yeah, yeah, true. We're not given
45:18
a ton, but... Here I go again in my etymology.
45:22
Here I go again. I'm very singy tonight in my
45:25
head. Save that, we need that. There was another
45:28
one that you did earlier and I couldn't, but
45:31
keep going. Yeah, I can't remember what it was.
45:35
So his name means united or oneness. Oh, rambling
45:40
man, left -handed man. That's what popped into
45:43
my head. Oh, interesting. When you said he was
45:45
a left -handed man. I, in my head, heard Ramblin'
45:49
Man. He's a Ramblin' Man. We could work with
45:53
that. What's the ZZ Top song that was like the
45:59
Duck Dynasty intro? That's a super specific thing.
46:04
Do you know what I'm talking about? I actually
46:05
never watched Duck Dynasty. I'm trying to think
46:10
of like the... A few times I've seen a clip of
46:12
Fireford. So not Ramblin' Man, that's not what
46:15
I'm thinking of. That's a different song. A different
46:16
one, okay. Yeah, anyways. If you know what I'm
46:20
talking about, you know what I'm talking about.
46:21
Yeah, drop that in the comments. If you don't,
46:23
then it doesn't matter. Just keep going. So Ehud.
46:27
Yeah, Ehud. Ehud. So his name means united or
46:30
oneness. I like that. And so what's significant
46:34
about that is because... Well, there's a couple
46:38
interesting things. So the detail about him being
46:40
left -handed, I think it's like that can be taken
46:43
in some ways as like reversal. Okay. Because
46:45
like here we are where they're back in turmoil.
46:50
Israel is. Yeah. They're being oppressed. Yeah.
46:53
And then from the tribe of the right -handed
46:57
people essentially, we have a left -handed person,
47:00
someone who stands out from the rest. Yeah. And
47:03
then he ends up leading this charge and leads
47:07
eventually Israel into 80 years of peace. And
47:11
I think that's pretty interesting. Because it's
47:16
also the longest recorded piece that we see in
47:20
the book of Judges. And so that's where it's
47:22
like, he did such an amazing thing, but we don't
47:26
talk about him. And I think honestly is because
47:29
what he did can be a little bit messy. which
47:34
is the assassin part. Yeah, which you kind of
47:37
briefly went over that, but like. That's what
47:39
I was like, I wanted to kind of get through this
47:41
and then we'll jump back to that. Okay, okay.
47:42
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, and because like,
47:47
so Othniel, the first judge, brings a period
47:51
of 40 years. Yeah. Which also calls back to like
47:55
the 40 years in the desert. It's like there's
47:56
a little bit of restoration in that. And it's
47:59
understood kind of more as a generation. So for
48:02
a generation there was peace, right? And then
48:06
the second judge brought two generations of peace.
48:09
So it was multiplied, which is kinda cool. Which
48:12
is pretty neat. Yeah, and it's fascinating too
48:15
because I think what we often talk about and
48:19
we like to see is the David story. It's like,
48:22
oh, he's doing these bold declarations. He's
48:25
a very charismatic figure. He said he was very
48:27
handsome. Of course. Very handsome boy. The most
48:32
handsomeest. That boy was ready. He was handsome.
48:37
You should see his sling. Boy, he can sling like
48:41
that. Not one, not two, not three, not four,
48:45
but five stones. The boy would carry. He didn't
48:49
just kill a lion, he killed a bear too. He would
48:51
use one and refill it. Always had five stones.
48:54
Always had it, can't fight without five, don't
48:57
have too much. Yeah, we're losing it. Enough
49:01
Trump David. But then we've got like the other
49:04
characters like Samson. Okay. And he's kind of
49:07
like the moral. He had six toes. Not five like
49:12
a normal. Goliath is a big boy. He wasn't a normal.
49:15
The biggest boy. He was a giant with six toes.
49:20
On both feet. And he had a brother. Six more
49:25
tones. This also feels like we're doing like
49:27
Frank Sinatra. Yeah, it is. It's a terrible impression.
49:33
Like kind of singing like Frank Sinatra in his
49:35
phrasing. All right, what were we talking about?
49:38
Six tones. That's life. That's what I've seen.
49:45
It's all the people say. It's like kind of talking
49:47
like Trump. That's also not Frank Sinatra. Or
49:51
is it? Doesn't matter. I think it's Rat Pack
49:53
for sure. It is. Yeah. I think it is Frank Sinatra.
49:56
Maybe. All right. But anyway. Love Frank Sinatra.
50:01
Shout out Frank Sinatra. If you're out there.
50:08
Time will tell. Time will tell. Time will tell.
50:11
That's awful. So we have Samson, who is like
50:18
this morally questionable character as well.
50:21
We see him overcome. So we get this full narrative
50:23
arc that we like. There's no mess. It's a little
50:26
bit messy in the middle, but then it ends up
50:28
being good in the end. True. And we're like,
50:30
oh yes, I like that. Let's start preaching out
50:32
of that. Let's talk about this. And for a character
50:35
like this, we don't really see a full arc. We
50:38
don't know anything about him, really, besides
50:40
he's left -handed. And then he just kind of appears
50:45
one day, and then he conceals a weapon on himself,
50:52
sneaks in, and it's funny the way he does it,
50:57
too, because he walks in. They're like, yeah,
50:59
here's your tribute. They're like, awesome. He's
51:00
like, oh, by the way, I've got a message for
51:02
you. Oh, wait. Is Ehud not the tribute? No. So
51:08
I think he brought a tribute, which was like
51:12
food, probably like a food offering, probably
51:15
a food. Why did I think that he himself was the
51:18
tribute? No, I think they put a tribute together.
51:20
I feel like that's part of it, though. Let's
51:23
pull that out because he becomes part of like
51:27
he. He now is like that guy's. Say that one more
51:35
time. Like he's not like a messenger. He's not
51:37
like door dashing. Oh, oh yeah. You know what
51:40
I mean? He's like, he is like whatever they gave
51:43
him, if it wasn't Ehud himself, Ehud came along
51:48
with it and never left. That was the, like that's
51:52
a big part of it. Is that like as tribute, like
51:56
Ehud is You know I'm saying I think I know what
52:00
you're saying. Like he's the president. Well,
52:02
so like think about right think about the Hunger
52:04
Games Okay. Oh, I see what you're saying. Like
52:06
I go as tribute like I'm the sacrifice Yeah,
52:12
I see what you're saying, but it does say they've
52:14
brought a present Yeah, so yeah, cuz it let's
52:19
see Ehud son of Jera of Benjaminite a man left
52:25
-handed and by him the children of israel sent
52:28
a present unto eglon that's the guy's name the
52:31
king of moab yeah there you go but he had made
52:33
him a dagger which had two edges um and he did
52:37
not gird it under his raiment upon his right
52:40
or he did sorry um and he brought the present
52:44
unto eglon king of moab And Eglon was a very
52:48
fat man, so it probably was food. And when he
52:54
had made an end to offer the present, he sent
52:57
away the people that bear the present. But he
53:00
himself turned again from the quarries that were
53:03
Gilgal and said, I have a secret errand unto
53:06
thee, O King, who said, keep silence. And all
53:12
that stood by him went out from him. and Ehud
53:15
came unto him, and he was sitting in a summer
53:17
parlor, which he had for himself alone. And Ehud
53:22
- Wait, are you - Apparently this is King James.
53:24
Yeah. I didn't know how to switch it. When he
53:27
started saying that, I was like, wait, this is
53:30
not - Oh, I found it. I had just looked something
53:34
up, and I swapped over to the King James to see
53:37
what - Yeah, I was just kind of rocking with
53:38
it. Because someone was like - Oh, not in the
53:42
King James, and so I looked at the King James
53:44
and I just left it. Yeah, I figured out how to
53:47
switch it. Yeah, there you go. All right, this
53:49
will be a mushy... And way more accurate. So
53:54
yeah, we'll get into that. We already have. Yeah,
53:58
we have, we have. Yeah, we haven't done a full
54:00
translation. Let's try that again. Okay. The
54:05
people... Because here's the thing is like, and
54:10
this was part of the discussion with the King
54:12
James, is like, the King James will take stuff
54:15
where one part of the Bible references or it
54:18
fills out in the other space in the Bible, and
54:20
then it tells you that it added it or you need
54:23
to go look at this. The King James doesn't do
54:25
that. No. it will just go, oh, this is referencing
54:28
this, let's just put it in, and they don't leave
54:31
it parenthetical, it just becomes part of the
54:33
text, which is a problem, because it means that
54:37
they're taking something from over here, and
54:39
instead of making a commentary, or making a note,
54:42
it just puts it in the text, which is not original
54:45
text. Well, that's the big thing, is the motivation
54:49
behind the King James Bible. Anyway, it was a
54:52
political move right it wasn't to have a good
54:54
translation. Yes. It was just to make people
54:56
happy. Yes And that so actually that reminds
55:00
me of something real quick to you, which I don't
55:01
know if we've talked about but wait quick don't
55:05
No, don't say it. No, do you know I'm gonna say
55:07
I think so and It's for something else. Okay
55:11
It might be that but it was gonna be a quick
55:16
aside, but let's say okay So yeah, so let's start
55:21
here again the people of Israel sent tribute
55:24
by him to Eglon the king of Moab and He had made
55:27
for himself a sword with we talked about that
55:30
And then and he presented the tribute to Eglon
55:33
the king of Moab Now Eglon was a very fat man.
55:37
They kept that detail for sure And when he had
55:40
finished presenting the tribute he sent away
55:42
the people who carried the tribute But he himself
55:45
turned back at the idols near Gilgal Gilgal and
55:49
said, I have a secret message for you, O King.
55:52
And he commanded silence. And all his attendants
55:56
went out from his presence. And Ehud came to
55:59
him as he was sitting alone in his cool roof
56:02
chamber. And Ehud said, I have a message from
56:05
God for you. And he arose from his seat. And
56:08
Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword
56:11
from his right thigh, and thrust it into his
56:14
belly. Hey, explicit warning. No, the next part
56:21
is what's explicit. Oh, yeah, this part is explicit
56:24
That's very are you gonna read it or no? Okay,
56:29
this is the Bible even warned yeah And the hilt
56:35
also went in after the blade and the fat closed
56:39
over the blade For he did not pull out the sword
56:41
from his belly, which I mean, I wouldn't like
56:44
I'm not getting in there And then it says, and
56:46
the dung came out. Then Ehud went out into the
56:50
porch and closed the doors of the roof chamber
56:52
behind him and locked them. And so it's like,
56:56
it's this very clear, like, yeah, he assassinated
56:59
that guy. But I think it's funny to me, the fact
57:03
that he's sitting there, and like, do you think
57:04
he planned it out? Or he's just like, I got a
57:07
message for you. It's like, this is gonna be
57:10
so funny. Silence, everyone out. Go ahead. I've
57:14
got a message from you, from Gad. Have you ever
57:18
seen the Blues Brothers? Oh yeah. Yes. We're
57:22
on a mission from Gad. Getting the band back
57:25
together. That's Ehud. I've got a message from
57:31
Gad. Ehud. Terrible. Dancing the line between
57:37
heresy and... But. Yeah. Yeah, so I always think
57:43
of this guy, Eaglond? Yeah, Eaglond. Eaglond?
57:47
Egg on his face. Egg on his face, Moab. I always
57:50
picture him as Jabba the Hutt. Oh, same. Or Pizza
57:56
the Hutt. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They jammed the system.
58:02
Sorry. Raspberry. His helmet is still the funniest
58:09
thing. It's so good. Yeah, so I always think
58:11
of him as Shabba the Hutt. Yeah. And it's like
58:16
this guy that is extremely gluttonous and like
58:20
this representation of a king who has literally
58:23
everything and thinks that nothing can happen
58:25
to him. Yeah. This guy just like tricks him like,
58:29
hey, my name is right hand and I use my left
58:33
hand for the sword. Do you want to see a magic
58:35
trick? Here we go. What's behind my left hand?
58:41
That's life. It's all that people say. Actually,
58:44
some scholars believe he was singing that song.
58:47
I have a message from God. That's life. So. Yeah.
58:57
Does God raise up an assassin? And it seems like,
58:59
yeah. But it calls him a deliverer. He calls
59:02
him a what? A deliverer. A tomato tomato. He
59:06
was delivering a message though. Yes, yes, he
59:10
did deliver a package. But I think that's part
59:12
of the messy thing with his character arc though.
59:15
True. Is because, all right, now we've got to
59:18
look at some odd things. Yeah, and you know the
59:21
funny thing about that passage? Yeah. Can you
59:23
show me? So like, the funny thing about this
59:25
passage is... At the very end of this passage,
59:30
it says, so Moab was subdued that day under the
59:33
hand of Israel, and the land had rest for 80
59:36
years. And then we get one verse after that,
59:42
that is the third judge of Israel, guy named
59:44
Shamgar, says after him was Shamgar, the son
59:48
of Anath, who killed 600 of the Philistines with
59:51
an ox goad, and he also saved Israel. That's
59:55
the only time we hear about Shamgar. Yeah Poor
59:59
Shamgar. Oh, yeah. Oh wait, and then that guy
1:00:02
Shamgar He actually killed 600 Philistines with
1:00:05
an ox guard and he also saved Israel. Cool. That's
1:00:09
alive! Next! So does God raise up assassins?
1:00:15
Well, he does raise up delivers. He sure does.
1:00:18
Sometimes they look like assassins in the Old
1:00:21
Testament. That's it. In the New Testament, it's
1:00:24
a different story. Different time. Different
1:00:27
story. Different situation. But when they needed
1:00:31
a deliverer, God showed up. That's right. That's
1:00:35
right. Three, two, one.