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FOCUS: Straight Up Self Love · Do You F*cking Mind?

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Feelings of powerlessness and inadequacy. So this is very big
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: on the self talk, and the reason you feel these
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: ways is because of the self talk. But when you
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: feel that your self worth is governed by things that
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: you cannot control, you feel like the victim and you
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: feel like, well, how can I love myself if I
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: wasn't genetically blessed at birth? Or how can I love
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: myself when I struggle really hard to get anything done academically?
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: Or this I could go on forever.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: So we feel powerless because we think that our worth
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: is on things that we cannot control. But you need
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: to shift yourself self worth and like to strengthen yourself
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: importance by putting the focus on things that cannot be bought, borrowed,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: or stolen.
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: Or given to you genetically. So it's kind of what
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: you can earn.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: So for example, like I mentioned earlier when I said,
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: if you see someone being criticized, if you were to
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: go and stand up for that person, that's now part
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: of your character. You've earned that, You've earned this really
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: nice aspect of your character where you are a defender
• 1:34
  Speaker 1: of people.
• 1:35
  Speaker 2: That's really fucking cool.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: You know, you can be someone that has the ability
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: to make other people.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: Laugh all the time. That's something that can't be bought, borrowed,
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: or stolen from you. That's something that you've earned. You've
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: earned that skill.
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: Or if you're not innately funny, you might have the
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: ability to make someone feel really good about themselves every
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: time you have an encounter with them, and every time
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: they walk away they're like, Wow, I feel like I
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: take a really positive piece of that person. Every time
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: I leave, like they leave me feeling really nice. That's
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: a fucking amazing character trait to have. So there are
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: things that you can build within your character that can
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: never be taken away from you, and then you'll start
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: to really value that about yourself. You can be like, fuck,
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: I bring so much to the table, and it doesn't
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: even have to be through intelligence or looks. It can
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: be you can be like an amazing educator. You could
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: share your knowledge if that's where your strengths lie. But
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: what I'm saying is that there are so many avenues
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: in which you can impart a part of you to
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: other people, and you then put your self importance on that,
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: on what it is that you have to offer to
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: other people, and it can have absolutely nothing to do
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: with the way you were born, how you look your intelligence.
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: There's so many things that you don't have to derive
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: your sense of self or sense of importance from those things,
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: and you can.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: Get a really really high level of genuine self love
• 3:24
  Speaker 2: when you see that where.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: Your self importance comes from. Also doing things for yourself
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: is really huge. Like if you want to start exercising,
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: it doesn't matter if you want to start exercising, well,
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: let's say you started exercising but you never lost a
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: gram of weight, you could still have a really high
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: level of self importance because you went from being able
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: to run one k to ten k's.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: That's fucking awesome. And you're healthier.
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: Even if you never lost that weight, you are now healthier,
• 3:52
  Speaker 1: you're stronger, your cardiovascular system is stronger, you are now
• 3:56
  Speaker 1: loving your body more. So there's always always something you
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: can do for yourself or for other people that's going
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: to heighten your sense of importance to yourself. How you
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: start feeling about yourself. So that's a huge one. And
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: if you ever find yourself in a situation where you're
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: feeling inadequate, kind of ask yourself, am I putting myself
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: importance on something that I absolutely have zero control over,
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: And how can I shift in this moment right now,
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: how can I shift my focus and think about one
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: thing that I do for other people.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: That is unique to me and that makes other people
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: feel good?
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: Like, how do I what do I have to offer
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: as part of my character and personality that I have
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: worked on that other people that make other people feel
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: good or that better someone else's day. And there's always
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: something that you can find. And if there isn't, then
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: fucking get your fucking shit together and start being a
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: nicer person, seriously, because that's ridiculous.
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: There's got to be something