Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / #12: 5 Ways to Know Your Relationship is in Trouble

Transcript

#12: 5 Ways to Know Your Relationship is in Trouble · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

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  Speaker 1: Hello and welcome. This is episode twelve of The Happy
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  Speaker 1: Family's podcast. My name is doctor Justin Colson, and this
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  Speaker 1: is the podcast that's dedicated to making your family happier.
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  Speaker 1: I speak to people pretty much every day who are
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  Speaker 1: struggling with their family relationships. There's parents who are just
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  Speaker 1: so tired of their children's challenging behavior. Then there's children
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  Speaker 1: who are well, they're stressed. I think they're trying to
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  Speaker 1: keep up with the sometimes over the top demands of
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  Speaker 1: their parents. Sometimes parents just want their kids to be perfect,
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  Speaker 1: nothing less, nothing more, just perfect that we find, and
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  Speaker 1: sometimes parents just load their kids up with a bit
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  Speaker 1: more than is healthy, and so children struggle, and frankly,
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  Speaker 1: a lot of the families that I deal with are
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  Speaker 1: in genuine, real trouble. So today we're going to talk
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  Speaker 1: about five ways that we can know that a family relationship,
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  Speaker 1: or any relationship for that matter, is in trouble. That's
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  Speaker 1: coming up real soon. Plus how do we cope with
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  Speaker 1: angry children. I'm going to share some ideas about that
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  Speaker 1: with you in three minute therapy, and in the final
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  Speaker 1: segment of the podcast, I'm going to start sharing this
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  Speaker 1: stuff that's really exciting me in my personal learning journey.
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  Speaker 1: You know, there's an old saying that leaders are readers,
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  Speaker 1: and I want to share with you the stuff that
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  Speaker 1: I'm learning about because when I'm learning something new, it
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  Speaker 1: helps me to be better and it inspires me. And
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  Speaker 1: hopefully in your leadership roles, in your family, and for
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  Speaker 1: some of you, perhaps in your workplace, some of the
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  Speaker 1: things that I share will hopefully be helpful. So today
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  Speaker 1: I'll be sharing some ideas about what life is really
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  Speaker 1: all about. So that's all coming up. But next, five
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  Speaker 1: ways to know that your relationship is in trouble and
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  Speaker 1: what you can do about it.
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  Speaker 2: Your conference starts in five minutes. People are inside taking
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  Speaker 2: their chairs. I wonder what's going to happen next. Perhaps
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  Speaker 2: you're worried about the guest speakers. What will they say?
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  Speaker 2: Will it be appropriate, relevant and up to date? Will
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  Speaker 2: it be evident based? Is it going to be stimulating?
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  Speaker 2: You want people to come to you at the end
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  Speaker 2: of the day and say, wow, thanks for organizing today.
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  Speaker 2: I took so much away from the conference. Doctor Justin
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  Speaker 2: Coulson can help. He speaks to school kids, teachers, parents
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  Speaker 2: and professionals about families and happiness because we all want
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  Speaker 2: happier families, happier classrooms, and happier workplaces. So what's your
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  Speaker 2: next conference about? To learn more about getting a speaker
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: who will help your audience learn, laugh, and leave with
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  Speaker 2: practical tools that will empower them to be happier, more productive,
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  Speaker 2: and better parents, teachers, people, And if you'd like the
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  Speaker 2: credit for having chosen that speaker, visit happy families dot
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  Speaker 2: com dot au for more information about booking doctor Justin
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  Speaker 2: Coulson as a speaker at your next conference.
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  Speaker 1: Well, my parent wakes up in the morning asking what
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  Speaker 1: can I do today to make my child's life hell?
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  Speaker 1: I mean, some days we wonder whether and our children
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  Speaker 1: have woken up asking themselves how they can make our
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  Speaker 1: life hell. But we don't want to make life horrible.
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  Speaker 1: We want our families to be happy. Sometimes though, we
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  Speaker 1: do wonder do my children exist for any reason other
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  Speaker 1: than to make my life uncomfortable? In my first book,
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  Speaker 1: What Your Child Needs from You, and also in my
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  Speaker 1: latest book, twenty one Days to a Happier Family, I
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  Speaker 1: describe how parenting and family life, if we let it,
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  Speaker 1: can become the greatest character education process that we'll ever experience.
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  Speaker 1: And it all comes down to one really simple question.
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  Speaker 1: Am I seeing my child as a person? Or am
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  Speaker 1: I seeing my child as a problem? So here are
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  Speaker 1: five signs that we've stopped seeing our children as people
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  Speaker 1: and started seeing them as problems. The first one is
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  Speaker 1: that we become endlessly critical. Maybe you find yourself being
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  Speaker 1: constantly annoyed with your child. You're always into them about something,
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  Speaker 1: or maybe if they're a teenager, you're always into them
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  Speaker 1: about everything. Maybe you say things like I'm sick and
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  Speaker 1: tired of telling you this, or why don't you ever
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  Speaker 1: do what I say? Spending our time concentrating on all
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  Speaker 1: of the stuff that our children are not doing builds resentment,
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  Speaker 1: and it reduces our children to being things objects in
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  Speaker 1: our eyes, rather than people. Being endlessly critical. The second
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  Speaker 1: sign that our relationships could be in trouble is that
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  Speaker 1: we become contemptuous from time to time. I hate even
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  Speaker 1: saying it. I cringe just saying it. But every now
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  Speaker 1: and again we'll hear a parent say something like listen here,
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  Speaker 1: you selfish little brat, or maybe they'll frustratingly look at
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  Speaker 1: the job and you're driving me insane, or get over
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  Speaker 1: here now, you ungrateful little piece of filthful, you know
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  Speaker 1: they call their kids stupid idiots and that kind of thing.
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  Speaker 1: When we treat someone with contempt, what that means is
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  Speaker 1: that we're treating them as though they're beneath us, they're
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  Speaker 1: not worthy of our consideration or our kindness. And when
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  Speaker 1: we treat our children with contempt, it's a sign that
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  Speaker 1: we're not seeing them as people. We're seeing them as
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  Speaker 1: something below us, and we despise them. This kind of
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  Speaker 1: language and attitude obviously suggests that our relationships are unhealthy
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  Speaker 1: and headed for trouble. The third sign that a relationship
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  Speaker 1: could be in strife is that we show a lack
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  Speaker 1: of humility. If we're heavily critical of our children, or
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  Speaker 1: if we're contemptuous towards them, there's a very good chance
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  Speaker 1: that we lack that quality that's so essential for being
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  Speaker 1: a great parent. It's the quality of humility. In a
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  Speaker 1: parenting context, humility means that we're willing to stop and
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  Speaker 1: understand how things are for our child, see the world
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  Speaker 1: through our child's eyes, and maybe even consider it ourselves.
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  Speaker 1: Am I getting the whole picture? Or am I wrong
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  Speaker 1: with something here? If we lack humility, If we lack it,
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  Speaker 1: we stop considering how things are for our kids. It's
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  Speaker 1: all about us and our agenda. And when we lack
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  Speaker 1: humility in a relationship, it's a sign that we've forgotten
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  Speaker 1: that the other person is a person about us. The
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  Speaker 1: world revolves around me. Stop being such a nuisance and
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  Speaker 1: thinking it revolves around you, And of course our relationship
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  Speaker 1: will invariably suffer if that's our dominant attitude. Okay, the
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  Speaker 1: fourth way to know that our relationship could be in
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  Speaker 1: trouble is this we make our love conditional. Now, I
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  Speaker 1: don't believe that there are too many parents who are
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  Speaker 1: out there who would say I'll only love you if
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  Speaker 1: you do what I ask. But while very few parents
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  Speaker 1: might say that explicitly, a lot of parents offer contingent
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  Speaker 1: positive regard unknowingly. What that means is I'll only love
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  Speaker 1: you if you do this or do that. I've actually
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  Speaker 1: heard some parents say I won't love you anymore if
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  Speaker 1: you keep doing that. Now, maybe they were just joking,
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  Speaker 1: but it sounds and feels awful. Relationships that make positive
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  Speaker 1: regard kindness love contingent on behavior tend to be less
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  Speaker 1: healthy than unconditional relationships. Okay, here's the last tip. The
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  Speaker 1: last way that we make our relationships unhealthy at last,
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  Speaker 1: sign that are relationships in trouble, we shut our children out.
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  Speaker 1: Some parents just do that. One mom taught her newborn
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  Speaker 1: this is a true story. I can't believe it. She
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  Speaker 1: taught her newborn that she should sleep all night. And
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  Speaker 1: the way she taught her that was by not going
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  Speaker 1: to her when she cried in the night from day one.
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  Speaker 1: Many parents that I know send their kids to the
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  Speaker 1: naughty chair when they behave in challenging ways. Often parents
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  Speaker 1: of teens simply stop talking to them because they're so
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  Speaker 1: hard to get along with. In fact, one father that
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  Speaker 1: I recently spoke with told me, I've washed my hands
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  Speaker 1: of my fourteen year old daughter. I'm sick of her.
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  Speaker 1: She's too hard to deal with. I'm just having nothing
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  Speaker 1: to do with her from now on, and he meant it.
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  Speaker 1: Such an approach to our relationships with our children suggests
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  Speaker 1: that we don't have the maturity to manage these relationships effectively,
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  Speaker 1: and our relationships with them are undoubtedly in trouble. And
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  Speaker 1: you know what, our kids deserve so much better than this.
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  Speaker 1: They need us to be so much better. So when
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  Speaker 1: we see our children as problems or hassles or inconveniences,
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  Speaker 1: we stop seeing them as people, We start seeing them
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  Speaker 1: as a pain, as an object, and we forget that
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  Speaker 1: they're real people with real feelings and real hopes and
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  Speaker 1: real desires. So what can we do instead, Well, it's
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  Speaker 1: actually pretty simple. First, rather than being critical, ask questions.
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  Speaker 1: We might say, I saw that you didn't clean your
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  Speaker 1: room when I asked you to What happened? Do you
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  Speaker 1: need help? Second, don't name call ever, just never, ever, ever,
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  Speaker 1: ever name call unless it's a wonderful name, like hello,
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  Speaker 1: my wonderful child who I love with all my heart.
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  Speaker 1: To see the world through their eyes, try and remember
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  Speaker 1: what it's like to be a child or a struggling teenager.
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  Speaker 1: That's where humility comes from. Ask yourself, could I be
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  Speaker 1: wrong about my child? And finally, just love them no
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  Speaker 1: matter what? Rather than shutting them out when things go
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  Speaker 1: wrong or challenge us, invite them closer, particularly at the
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  Speaker 1: tough times. These are the things that make relationships with
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  Speaker 1: our children stronger and healthier, and they make families happier.
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  Speaker 1: So I'd love to hear from you. Tell me about
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  Speaker 1: what you've noticed as a sign that a relationship with
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  Speaker 1: your child could be in trouble. Leave your answer at
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  Speaker 1: happy families dot com dot I use slash podcast slash
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: twelve like the number twelve? When do you know that
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  Speaker 1: your relationships are in trouble and what do you do
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: to make it better? Happy families dot com dot I
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: use slash podcast slash twelve Up next three minute therapy.
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: How do we deal with angry children?
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: When it comes to toilet training, things can get a
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: little stuck. Doctor Justin Coulson has written a no Mess,
• 9:46
  Speaker 2: no Fuss ebook to help. Written for busy parents. You'll
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: whizz through how to toilet train your child without getting
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: bogged in too much detail. You'll find straight shooting answers
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: about toilet training based on scientific research, like how to
• 10:00
  Speaker 2: know when your child is ready to toilet train and
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: the most popular toilet training approaches and what science says
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: about them. This is the fast flowing, easy to digest
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: ebook to get your kids going at the right time,
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: in the right place and the right way. Toilet training
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: easy as one two We available at Happy families dot
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: com dot au.
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: So I've received an email from a mum she's an
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  Speaker 1: RN a registered nurse, about her eleven year old daughter
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  Speaker 1: who is struggling to control her anger. There's no issues
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  Speaker 1: at school, but at home, whoa have? We got some
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  Speaker 1: hard work to do there. So here's my response. First
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  Speaker 1: of all, when we have angry children, we need to
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  Speaker 1: remember this anger is a habit. In fact, I spoke
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  Speaker 1: with one child recently, a fifteen year old girl who
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  Speaker 1: has a big anger issue, and she said, when I
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  Speaker 1: get angry, I get what I want. She's learned that
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  Speaker 1: when she gets mad, she gets the results she wants,
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  Speaker 1: so she just does it more and it's become her
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  Speaker 1: go to response to any challenging situation. I think that's
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  Speaker 1: what might be happening with this eleven year old girl
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  Speaker 1: in this particular request for help. And more often than not,
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  Speaker 1: the person who has the highest energy in an interaction
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  Speaker 1: wins whatever they're contesting. You've got the highest energy, you win.
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  Speaker 1: So if I'm eleven and I don't want to do
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  Speaker 1: the dishes, I just get angry and next thing you know,
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  Speaker 1: there's this big conflict that breaks out that I win
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  Speaker 1: because I keep getting angrier and I get out of
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  Speaker 1: the dishes. Even if I get sent to my room,
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  Speaker 1: that's fine. That's a win because I don't have to
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  Speaker 1: do the dishes in my bedroom. Ralph Waldo Emerson, American
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  Speaker 1: eighteen hundred's philosopher, essayist and general smart guy, said quote,
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  Speaker 1: we all boil at different levels, and I think that
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  Speaker 1: for this eleven year old, and maybe for one of
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  Speaker 1: your children, there's a low boiling point relative to what
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  Speaker 1: we might think that it should be, and perhaps that
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  Speaker 1: boiling point only gets reached in certain environments like at home.
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  Speaker 1: Probably whole lot of reasons for this, and they include
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  Speaker 1: things like the genetic inheritance of anger. That's probably a
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  Speaker 1: small component. I think a much bigger and more important
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  Speaker 1: component is what we do as parents. What's she's seen, mum, dad, friends, uncles, arties,
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  Speaker 1: nana's pops, what do they do, and the way that
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  Speaker 1: she's been responded to as well for previous outbursts. Have
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  Speaker 1: you ever noticed that when our children get angry and upset,
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  Speaker 1: we often look at them and say, would you calm
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  Speaker 1: down right now? Stop being so angry, And we do
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  Speaker 1: exactly what we've told them not to do. But also
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  Speaker 1: sometimes they might be struggling to control their anger because
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  Speaker 1: they're hungry or tired or stressed. So unfortunately, even if
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  Speaker 1: we're not aware of it, we usually fight fire with
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  Speaker 1: fire and that's unhelpful and unhealthy. We turn into puffer
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  Speaker 1: fish parenting puffer fish parents, i should say, and we
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  Speaker 1: blow ourselves up as big as we can to eliminate
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  Speaker 1: the threat that our child has become. This is not
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  Speaker 1: going to be helpful. It's only going to make more
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  Speaker 1: conflict in the home, and it's going to make our
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  Speaker 1: children feel more justified in being angry and hating everyone.
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  Speaker 1: So we need better solutions. Here's a couple of suggestions
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  Speaker 1: to help this mom and to help you if you're
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  Speaker 1: dealing with angry kids. Number one, talk about it, but
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  Speaker 1: remember timing is everything. Don't try and discuss your child's
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  Speaker 1: outbursts in the middle of an outburst. That's not going
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  Speaker 1: to get you a good result. If your child flares
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  Speaker 1: up and you say, see this is what I'm talking about,
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  Speaker 1: you're doing the angry thing right now. They're not going
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  Speaker 1: to look at it and smile and say, ah, good point,
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  Speaker 1: thanks for helping me with that. We should talk this through.
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  Speaker 1: What they what they're going to do is get madder,
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  Speaker 1: and you're going to be accused of not understanding or
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  Speaker 1: judging or being so unfair. So instead, wait until things
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  Speaker 1: have been calm for a while, go for a walk together,
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  Speaker 1: have a chat, and maybe say something like, hey, you
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  Speaker 1: know that outburst before, what was that about? How can
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  Speaker 1: we do something so this stuff doesn't keep happening. How
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  Speaker 1: does it make everyone feel okay? The next thing to
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  Speaker 1: do is to understand. We want to know where this
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  Speaker 1: is coming from. Our children behave in crazy ways because
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  Speaker 1: they have unmet needs. It's pretty much that simple. If
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  Speaker 1: a child is being angry out of all proportion, if
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  Speaker 1: they're hurting others, we might want to set them straight,
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  Speaker 1: but it just doesn't work. I often hear some parenting
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  Speaker 1: experts say things like parents, you've just got to get
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  Speaker 1: a spine, You've got to take back authority. Well, you do,
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  Speaker 1: but not in a way that creates power struggles and
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  Speaker 1: more contempt and critical speaking and horribleness. What we need
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  Speaker 1: to do instead is we need to have an understanding approach.
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  Speaker 1: A nurturing understanding approach allows our children to feel like
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  Speaker 1: we get it. We can stop the emotional flood of anger,
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  Speaker 1: and rather than telling them to calm down, we can
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  Speaker 1: just understand. Say hey, you know, I can see that
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  Speaker 1: it's an opportunity for us to be close. Where's this
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  Speaker 1: coming from? You're hungry, angry, lonely, tired, stressed, or sick,
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  Speaker 1: is a problem somewhere in your life. And then we
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  Speaker 1: give that emotion a name. We actually say, I see
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  Speaker 1: you're feeling like this. It's amazing. How if it can
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  Speaker 1: be named, it can be tamed. So find words to
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  Speaker 1: describe how they're feeling, and just show that you understand.
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  Speaker 1: The third tip is to teach you how to start conversations.
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  Speaker 1: You know, sometimes children just don't know what to say
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  Speaker 1: or how to say it, and they're so emotional that
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  Speaker 1: they just start blubbering and screaming and going crazy. So
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  Speaker 1: teach your kids to start softly and model that behavior yourself.
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  Speaker 1: Research clearly shows that soft startups lead to much more
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  Speaker 1: effective outcomes in conversations than harsh startups. One or two
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  Speaker 1: more quick ideas. You might want to let her know
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  Speaker 1: it's okay.
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  Speaker 2: Leave.
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  Speaker 1: There's a difference between storming out of a room in
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  Speaker 1: anger and leaving a room because you're not coping and
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  Speaker 1: going somewhere to cool off. One of them is about
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  Speaker 1: either punishing everyone and being just crazy angry, and the
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  Speaker 1: other one's about regulating yourself, and that's a much healthier approach.
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  Speaker 1: Let your child know that it is actually okay to
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  Speaker 1: regulate behavior. You might teach you that her angry thoughts
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  Speaker 1: are kind of like leaves floating down a river. And
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: if she closes her eyes and pictures herself sitting on
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  Speaker 1: a beautiful, peaceful riverbank under a gorgeous willow tree, and
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  Speaker 1: what those leaves float down the river? They can just
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  Speaker 1: float down the river and around the band, out of sight,
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  Speaker 1: and she can let them go. And the last point
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  Speaker 1: that I make is this can't means don't want to.
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  Speaker 1: I was raised by a mum who responded to every
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  Speaker 1: one of my whining I can't do it, mum statements
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  Speaker 1: with can't means don't want to. Now, this is a
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  Speaker 1: little bit of tough love, and it may not have
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  Speaker 1: specific science behind it, but what it does is it
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  Speaker 1: lets your child know that she can control her anger
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  Speaker 1: if she wants to. So when you say it's time
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  Speaker 1: to calm down now and she says I can't, you
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  Speaker 1: can say what car't means don't want to? And if
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  Speaker 1: you stay calm and responsive and understanding, you'll get much
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  Speaker 1: better outcomes with your child. Now, there's a whole lot
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  Speaker 1: of other anger management strategies that we could talk about,
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  Speaker 1: but that's more than three minutes of three minute therapy,
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  Speaker 1: and we do need to wrap this session up. But
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  Speaker 1: I've shared these because they're practical and they're helpful in
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  Speaker 1: their research based If you can model non aggressive, nonviolent,
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  Speaker 1: non angry interactions with your child, and you'll usually have
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  Speaker 1: better outcomes. If things get worse, check in with a
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  Speaker 1: local psychologist for some specific guidance. So that's my response
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: for this week. If you do have any questions, you
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: can ask me a question at happy families dot com
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: dot I use slash questions. Just send me an email
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: or the information that you need is at happy families
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: dot com dot I use slash questions. And I'm curious
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: about how else you deal with angry kids. If you
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: can keep your answers focused on being respectful to your children, please,
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: that would be great. Shea your ideas because I can't
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: give you all of the answers, so visit happy families
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: dot com dot I use slash podcast slash twelve like
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  Speaker 1: the number twelve, and tell me how would you deal
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  Speaker 1: with an always angry eleven year old in ways that
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  Speaker 1: help and that are respectful. Happy families dot com dot
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  Speaker 1: I use Slash podcast Slash twelve, and I'll be back
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  Speaker 1: in a second with a glimpse into what I've learned
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  Speaker 1: this week to help me to be a better parent
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  Speaker 1: and a better person.
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  Speaker 2: Are you pulling your hair out because your child won't listen?
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  Speaker 2: Find yourself shouting at the children because you just don't
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• 18:36
  Speaker 1: This week, I've been thinking a lot about research that's
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: related to our well being as parents, and some surprising
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: findings that suggest that the happiest parents are actually the
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: ones who are willing to give all they can to
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: their families. I posted this on Facebook and had a
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: really big response. I said this, I know we all
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: feel like servants or slaves to our children sometimes, but
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: it seems to me that the most effective parents and
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: spouses are servants. First. They put their children or their
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: partner before themselves. They're not too important to do the
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: unpopular jobs. The children and their spouse know that they
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: can trust them for help. They make their family members
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: better and stronger, and they do it with an attitude
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: of willingness rather than an attitude of begrudging martyrdom. So
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: that's what's been on my mind, and I think that
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: it can help us to be better parents and better people.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Can you imagine what would happen if we approached all
• 19:29
  Speaker 1: of our relationships like that? If we give what we
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: give willingly, with no expectation of anyone giving anything back,
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: and then if we get nothing back, it doesn't matter
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: because we gave it willingly, and if we do well,
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: that's a bonus. And it certainly pans out that way
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: in the research. What do you think? Love to know
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: your thoughts, Let me know what Happy families dot com
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: dot I use slash podcast Slash twelve. Okay, that's pretty
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: much all we've got time for this week. A quick
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: reminder my brand new book twenty one Days for a
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: Happier Family is selling like hotcakes. Actually it's going bananas.
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: You can get it online, you can get it in bookstores,
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: you can get it at my website, Happy families dot
• 20:05
  Speaker 1: com dot you as well as the twenty one Days
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: to a Happy Families program, which I'm going to tell
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: you about in the next podcast in a fortnight's time.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: In the meantime, though, visit the website and thank you
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: for listening to the podcast. I really hope your family
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: is happier because of it and that it's helping you
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: to grow as a person. If you have any questions
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: that you'd like to get answered, you can visit me
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: at Happy Families dot com dot I use slash questions.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: I'll do my best to answer you in an upcoming podcast.
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: And if you've enjoyed the episode, please jump online and
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: have a look at the show notes at happyfamilies dot
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: com dot. I use slash podcast slash twelve. You can
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: share it via Twitter and Facebook, and I'd be absolutely
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: thrilled if you would rate the podcast on iTunes because
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: it's those ratings that determine how likely it is that
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: people are going to discover the podcast. And because I
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: want it to be the best parenting podcast in the world,
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: I really need your ratings, so please please rate the podcast.
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: The ratings will increase the visibility of the podcast and
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: help other people to find it so that they can
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: have happier families as well. And of course, subscribe while
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: you're there on iTunes to the Happy Families podcast. So
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: that's it for this week. I'll have another one ready
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: to go for you in about a fortnight's time. Every
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: two weeks they come out. This one will be about
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: how to make playing with your children fun because there's
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: more some people don't like doing it until then. Remember
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: you don't have to be the best parent in the world.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: You just have to be the best parent in your
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: children's work.