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5-MINUTE FRIDAY: I Never Thought I'd Say This · Hurdle with Emily Abbate

• 0:19
  Speaker 1: We made it to Friday. Oh my gosh, it is
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: so hot here in New York City this week. I
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: leave the real feel today that this is coming out
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: on Friday is something like one hundred and six degrees
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: And something about it being this temperature outside makes the
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: days crawl for me, crawl. I don't know if that's
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: weird or not. I'm okay with that, Emily here, but
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: you already knew that. So happy to be here with
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: you on five minute Friday today. I want to talk
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: about something I have been mulling over lately, and that
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: is the fact that I I never thought I would
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: be doing what I am doing now. If you were
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: to ask me, gosh, when I was a little girl,
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: let's go there, let's go all the way back there,
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: what I thought I would be doing as an adult. Well,
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: a lot of us had crazy dreams when we were little.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: Many of you maybe thought that you would be teachers,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: or astronauts or professional athletes. I always wanted to be
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: a journalist, but I never thought that i'd be doing
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: so many of the things that I am doing in
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: this moment. I never thought that I would be living
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: in Brooklyn. I never thought that I would be self employed.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: I never thought that I would be traveling the world
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: for my work. I definitely didn't think that I would
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: be single in my mid thirties. I didn't think that
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: I would be addressing large groups of people in large
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: formats for keynote presentations. I mean, there are so many
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: things that I am doing in my life right now
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: that I never anticipated, and I think that is awesome.
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: I think that it's so easy for us to get
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: caught up in the plan. I caught up in the particulars,
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: stay so focused and dialed into what we think that
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: we quote unquote should be doing. But if a long
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: time ago I didn't accept the fact that this plan
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: I had for myself needed to be written in pencil
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: and that I had to feel okay and at ease,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: kind of a racing and starting over as I went,
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: then I wouldn't have the opportunity to be in the
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: position that I am in now. The best written plans
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: are written in pencil. I'll say that again, the best
• 2:33
  Speaker 1: written plans are written in pencil. And I have moments
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: where I wonder what life could be like if I
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: had followed the plan that I had set out for myself.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: But you know what, that doesn't really serve me. All
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: I can do is the best that I can with
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: what I have in this moment, and what I have
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: in this moment is pretty freaking awesome. So it's okay, right,
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: It's okay and understandable if at moments you have questions,
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: if at moments you ask yourself what if? But I
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: encourage you to focus on where you're at and where
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: you're going to pick up the pencil and continue to
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: plan out the best things, knowing that the plans might change.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: And that's cool. In fact, I'll be the first person
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: to tell you it's pretty freakin' awesome. My listener prompt
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: for you this week what is your plan for the
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: next six months? And what is your plan for the
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: next year. If you don't have a plan, it's okay,
• 3:40
  Speaker 1: don't stress. But this week I encourage you to ask
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: yourself what do I want from the next year? And
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: now a listener question.
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: Hey, Emily, it's Lauren from New York City. My question
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: is not directly really to fitness and wellness, but there's
• 4:01
  Speaker 2: definitely a significant connection. I am curious about how you
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: handle challenging individuals will say in a workplace or business setting.
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: So when you're faced with rather difficult personalities, what kind
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: of strategies and approaches do you use to maintain harmony
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: and achieve a positive outcome? Thank you so much, appreciate.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: You, Appreciate you. Lore Okay, this can be yes, challenging
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: individual challenging answer. Right, there's a lot of patients that
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: goes hand in hand with dealing with people, whether it
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: be in business or in life, that just don't jive
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: with your style. And it's frustrating, especially within business, because
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: this isn't a relationship that you can put up a
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: hard boundary and walk away from. In most cases, knowing
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: that there are a few things that I would recommend,
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: and most of these things will involve you being the
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: bigger person first and foremost, take a step back and
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: ask yourself what this person's motivation may be for acting
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: this certain way. When you get to a place where
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: you can empathize with where they are coming from, or
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: at least try to understand, you may notice that you
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: have less of a quote unquote short fuse with them.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: As time goes on. Then I would do my best
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: to reframe this to an opportunity. Right, there are always
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: going to be people in your life that will be difficult,
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: more difficult than others, and so knowing that you can
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: use this as an opportunity to practice, let's say your skills,
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: do an inventory, ask yourself, how is this person communicating?
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: And can I get on their level Again. I'm going
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: to bring it back to this workplace example. Maybe by
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: trying to understand this person's communications, they may be more
• 6:02
  Speaker 1: responsive to you. So if this person seems to be
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: really effective and prefers to communicate primarily over email, then
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: consider first sending them an email before confronting them about something,
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: maybe in the hallway. If you're an in person workplace
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: kind of person, say that five times fast. I know,
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: I know it can be really frustrating to be the
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: bigger person, but know that you have this gift of
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: being able to take a step back and ask yourself,
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: how can I best serve myself in this scenario? What
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: is within your power to protect your energy when dealing
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: with someone that doesn't have the best energy, especially again
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: when you can't walk away completely. Maybe it's making sure
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: that after these interactions you're doing something that makes you
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: feel like you're filling up your own cup. Or perhaps
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: it's doing everything within your power to limit the interactions
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: that you two have. Whatever the case may be, trust me,
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: you will be better for it in the long haul.
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: I know it's hard to hear, but I promise make
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: sure you're following along with hurdle over on social It's
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: at Hurdle podcast. I am over at Emily Abadi another
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: hurdle conquered. Catch you guys next time.