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92. Trusting What Emerges in Family Constellations with Andrea Lehmann · Constellations and all that...

• 0:00
  Tracy: Kia ora, and welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:03
  Tracy: I'm your host, Tracey Cartwright, and together we will be exploring the world of family constellations with facilitators from, and clients from around the world, looking at different perspectives and experiences in the work, having a cup of tea and just chatting with some friends around their experiences in constellations.
• 0:23
  Tracy: We'd love for you to join us.
• 0:25
  Tracy: I hope that you enjoy this series as much as I have loved making it.
• 0:33
  Tracy: Kia ora, everyone.
• 0:34
  Tracy: Welcome to Constellations and All That.
• 0:38
  Tracy: Today, I have the pleasure of chatting with Andrea Lehmann.
• 0:42
  Tracy: Welcome, Andrea.
• 0:43
  Andrea: Thank you, Tracey, for having me today.
• 0:46
  Tracy: Oh, it's so good.
• 0:47
  Tracy: It's so good that you're here.
• 0:49
  Tracy: You're looking fabulous, by the way.
• 0:51
  Tracy: You're looking-
• 0:51
  Andrea: Thank you… Tracy: haven't seen you for yeah, great to see you here.
• 0:57
  Andrea: Would you introduce a little bit about yourself, maybe where you're from and, um, and where you're based so that the listeners and the viewers can… Uh, and whatever else is there for you.
• 1:07
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 1:07
  Andrea: Sure.
• 1:09
  Andrea: So I am originally from Switzerland.
• 1:13
  Andrea: I was raised in Switzerland, but I was born in Australia.
• 1:17
  Andrea: So about 20 years I was there, done all my schooling, and then I wanted to go abroad and came to New Zealand for two years, and then went back and picked up my tools and my sheepskin and my my belongings and came over to live, because I've got an Australian passport.
• 1:40
  Andrea: And I am… First, I was kind of drawn to the Far North where I met Hone, my current partner, and have our beautiful two children.
• 1:53
  Andrea: And we settled about 2004 in Tauranga.
• 1:59
  Andrea: That's where we live now, Tauranga, New Zealand.
• 2:02
  Tracy: It's an amazing place that you've got there as well.
• 2:04
  Tracy: I know you guys do a lot of, um, a lot of work, and we'll get to that shortly.
• 2:10
  Tracy: So you're a constellation facilitator in, in the Bay of Plenty?
• 2:14
  Andrea: Yes.
• 2:15
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 2:16
  Tracy: Can you share a little bit about how did constellations find you?
• 2:20
  Andrea: So it was around the time of the crazy lockdown, sort of when everything opened up again.
• 2:28
  Andrea: And I was asked to come and bring some socks and masks and my crafts to, um, to Jo.
• 2:39
  Andrea: And- She, um, trusted me because I was, you know, a safe person, and so that- And
• 2:51
  Tracy: you guys knew each other through the Steiner School, right?
• 2:53
  Tracy: Yeah, yeah.
• 2:53
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 2:54
  Andrea: We know, knew each other through the Steiner School.
• 2:56
  Andrea: So I went there, and she bought socks, and, and she would tell me about this amazing training that, that she's been doing.
• 3:05
  Andrea: And I kind of, when I just looked at her body language, because I couldn't even understand what she was talking about, she just was like, "What?
• 3:15
  Andrea: This is so exciting.
• 3:16
  Andrea: Do you lean into your ancestors?" And I'm like, "What is she talking about?" Anyway, she, um, worked with me, and, uh, eventually worked with me, and talked about one day wanting to train.
• 3:31
  Andrea: So I was part of her, um, first training group in Palmer.
• 3:37
  Andrea: That's how- Fantastic … she found me, sort of in a, in a funny time, and I really appreciated it.
• 3:44
  Andrea: I thought it was pretty amazing, pretty effective.
• 3:48
  Tracy: And, and now you're running workshops and, um,
• 3:51
  Andrea: and- Yeah… Tracy: yeah.
• 3:52
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 3:52
  Andrea: So- And you see clients one on one.
• 3:55
  Andrea: Yep.
• 3:55
  Andrea: So pretty much, um, end of October 2022, I finished my training for the year with Joe and the class, and in the Kaimais beautiful setting and in nature.
• 4:13
  Andrea: And I pretty much started to have one-on-one clients, but in nature.
• 4:18
  Andrea: I di- I was like, "I don't have a clinic. I don't like to have a clinic, like, a white space." So I had, um- A space at Waipuna Park um, under the walnut tree with my mat.
• 4:33
  Tracy: Oh, wow.
• 4:34
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 4:35
  Andrea: So which actually worked out so beautiful.
• 4:37
  Andrea: It was not always the same tree, but it was just depending on, you know, this or that tree, and I kind of could choose which one I'm gonna go to.
• 4:46
  Andrea: And people felt really good.
• 4:48
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 4:49
  Andrea: Obviously it wouldn't happen in the rain, so there was a couple of cancellations we had to shuffle the appointments.
• 4:56
  Andrea: But I've done this for quite a while.
• 4:59
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 5:00
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 5:01
  Andrea: And in people's homes as well.
• 5:04
  Tracy: And, and how did you… I guess what a great place to learn, 'cause the, the natural environment will have really supported you and, uh, and, and, you know.
• 5:15
  Tracy: I don't know.
• 5:16
  Tracy: How was that?
• 5:17
  Tracy: Did you have any funny experiences from that?
• 5:20
  Andrea: Funny?
• 5:21
  Tracy: You know, like, or interesting experiences from the, from nature as part of your constellation.
• 5:27
  Andrea: Well, it was pretty… I- it's quite a big, so it's, it's a big space with, like, maybe 30 walnut trees.
• 5:35
  Andrea: So if people came they could see that we were doing some sort of something, and they kind of respectfully walked around.
• 5:43
  Andrea: But one day, it was so hilarious, there was, there was a dog that came, and he was, like, going right on the field.
• 5:53
  Andrea: He slid around on his bottom and scratched his bottom, and suddenly the dog was part of that constellation.
• 6:01
  Andrea: It was hilarious I think if anything, it was just showing us that humor was needing to be present in the field.
• 6:10
  Tracy: Mm.
• 6:11
  Andrea: Because- Dogs
• 6:11
  Tracy: are so good for that.
• 6:13
  Andrea: And-
• 6:13
  Tracy: Aren't they?
• 6:13
  Tracy: And
• 6:14
  Andrea: the, the woman was like, "Oh, I'm so, so sorry." Like, "How can we sort this out?" And I think the woman that was standing there, she was a little bit like… And so I just said- … "Yeah, I think it's… Yeah, maybe you could clean it a little bit." So she gone and got some, some wipes and wiped it a little bit and, and off we went and carried on.
• 6:34
  Andrea: So that was probably one of the funniest one I ever had, and we still laugh about it.
• 6:40
  Andrea: We just- Mm.
• 6:40
  Tracy: Mm. I j- 'cause you reminded me when, oh, it was in, in my early days in, in constellations too, and I was doing some work up in Kerikeri, and the only space that… I was h- having a conversation with someone.
• 6:54
  Tracy: We were walking along and, and it was like she, she just said,"I really need to do something.
• 6:58
  Tracy: So I need to do a piece of work." And I was like, "Well, let's do it here." And there was this great big tree, and it had all of the… The root system was quite large, and it was out of the ground, you know?
• 7:08
  Tracy: So you had to kind of step over or climb over in some parts.
• 7:12
  Tracy: And it was in a really busy area.
• 7:14
  Tracy: And it was almost like, what I remember what it felt like was that this energetic dome had come around us and, and prior to us going to this tree, where there were people all around it, there were people walking past it, you know, sitting around it, and when we walked up to, people had left, and it was just us And then nobody else came near us.
• 7:38
  Tracy: They all walked way around us except for the, some ducks.
• 7:42
  Tracy: Yeah, there's ducks come in, and they ended up being part of our constellation that was happening.
• 7:46
  Andrea: Oh.
• 7:46
  Tracy: And then as soon as the constellation was over, people came up through, cut past the tree and like you, you know, like it was almost like people just respectfully gave us… Well, I don't even know that they were intentional, but, um, it felt quite… We, we felt supported by the field, we'll say.
• 8:06
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 8:07
  Andrea: Nice.
• 8:08
  Andrea: Nice.
• 8:09
  Andrea: Well, thanks for sharing that, Tracy, because I… It just reminded me that in my early days when I then started to do constellations in groups, which was-- I may come back to it after, but I just want to share this one with the animals.
• 8:25
  Andrea: But it was after the intensive I suddenly felt the urge to do group work.
• 8:31
  Andrea: One particular time, I was doing group, um, constellations in Windermere with, at a friend's place, and dogs just kept joining the, the field.
• 8:43
  Andrea: Dogs, two dogs one day, and a cat.
• 8:46
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 8:47
  Andrea: It was like, you know how you can't tell animals to come and be part of it.
• 8:51
  Andrea: It was just like, in my mind, I thought the ne- I need to put that person's soul on the field, and the dog just came and just sat in front of- Yeah … the owner and, and just was present.
• 9:04
  Andrea: And same with the cat.
• 9:06
  Andrea: I think it was the higher self.
• 9:08
  Andrea: I worked quite a lot with the, the different parts of self at that time.
• 9:13
  Tracy: Mm.
• 9:14
  Andrea: The ca- the cat apparently lives more over at the next-door neighbor's, and she came back and joined the, the field as well.
• 9:23
  Andrea: So- Not that I'm terribly into dogs, so I'm not really much of a, an animal person as in like I do love them, but not… I wasn't intending to invite them on the field.
• 9:36
  Andrea: They just-
• 9:37
  Tracy: Mm.
• 9:38
  Tracy: Well, you're a nature person.
• 9:39
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 9:39
  Tracy: I mean, that shines through for you, so obviously the- they're all attuned to that, so.
• 9:45
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 9:45
  Tracy: And when there's a representative needed, one will show up, right?
• 9:48
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 9:49
  Tracy: Whether it's a fly or a, or a bird looking in the window or- Or- Or a sound on the outside.
• 9:56
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 9:56
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 9:57
  Andrea: It's like sometimes we have very distractive noises that kind of get part of it.
• 10:03
  Andrea: Mm. Like an airplane going over and you just gotta go, "Oh, distraction."
• 10:10
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 10:11
  Andrea: Okay.
• 10:11
  Andrea: It kind of just makes you pause and yeah.
• 10:14
  Andrea: So it's just all part of it, like yeah.
• 10:18
  Andrea: But it wasn't really planned, so I, I would call my in- um, my constellations quite intuitive.
• 10:25
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 10:26
  Andrea: So not really, um… From the beginning, I think that's what I loved about it.
• 10:31
  Andrea: I loved that, um, Jo has, um, you know, she has passed that on that it is a evolving thing.
• 10:40
  Andrea: It's not like a plan.
• 10:41
  Andrea: So I, yeah, I just go with that intuition and, and try really hard not to… Sometimes the, in the beginning, my ego would come in and go, "What are you actually doing?" And then I'd be like, "Hang on.
• 10:58
  Andrea: I've got this." Mm. And quickly, I just loved the- The wisdom of the field.
• 11:08
  Andrea: So I would call the field like a, a somatic-
• 11:12
  Tracy: Yeah… Andrea: so I keep saying, you know this? What is constellation?" And then I tell them what it's not.
• 11:21
  Tracy: It's not clairvoyancy.
• 11:24
  Tracy: It's not channeling.
• 11:26
  Tracy: It's just like calming yourself down and just feeling.
• 11:30
  Tracy: Mm. I feel cold.
• 11:31
  Tracy: I feel warm.
• 11:32
  Tracy: I feel like I'm leaning forward.
• 11:35
  Tracy: I don't feel anything.
• 11:36
  Tracy: I feel like I'm flat, or I feel like I'm floating.
• 11:39
  Tracy: Whatever these things are, they're always, um… You know, I, I'm always blown away how people that never experienced this before can step in out of nowhere and just go like… I'm like, "I didn't know you were, like, a pro at this." Yeah, exactly, and people are… They, they surprise themselves, don't they?
• 11:57
  Tracy: Oh.
• 11:57
  Tracy: I haven't done this work before.
• 11:59
  Tracy: Perfect.
• 11:59
  Tracy: Yes.
• 11:59
  Andrea: That's
• 12:00
  Tracy: great.
• 12:01
  Tracy: Absolutely.
• 12:02
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 12:02
  Tracy: So, so how do you… So if you're meeting someone for the first time, so say you're at a… 'Cause I know you do a lot of, um, community stuff.
• 12:08
  Tracy: Oh, yeah.
• 12:09
  Tracy: If you're talking to someone about constellations for the first time, how do you describe it?
• 12:14
  Andrea: Well, I just get the… In a conversation maybe, say if I'm at the market or something, I get a feeling of a person having this big hurdle that they're pushing along, or like a, a lead thing that they're dragging along their foot.
• 12:28
  Andrea: And I just- Talk about it and then it's kind of like, I, I was thinking about it before we had this conversation,'cause I do a lot of like, um, craft workshops- Mm … and fermenting and home-steding and kind of real things, so that's how people know me.
• 12:46
  Andrea: And they, I think they trust my, uh, methods of like you do this and you add this and you get that.
• 12:52
  Andrea: Yes.
• 12:54
  Andrea: So but actually in a way constellation is like that too and- It is … it is really lately I found about community really.
• 13:04
  Andrea: People longing to have connections.
• 13:06
  Andrea: If it is my knitting workshop where we learn to make socks, or if it's learning to knit in general or whatever, or constellating, it's people in the breaks share how they just long to be connected to some like-minded people.
• 13:22
  Andrea: And it's actually, it's that belonging that, um, the opposite- Mm … from separation.
• 13:27
  Andrea: So the more little groups in this world that we have where people can feel comfortable, um, they don't feel so alone.
• 13:37
  Andrea: Because I really, I think my saying is we heal in community, not in, in isolation.
• 13:45
  Andrea: I think I've picked that of other beautiful, um, family constellation idols like Margarita and, and others.
• 13:55
  Andrea: Like it's something that I have heard before and I kind of, it's dear to my heart.
• 14:00
  Tracy: Margarite talks about the relational field, right?
• 14:03
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 14:04
  Tracy: And it's all in relation and, and that c- and we have that, that inner connection and, and we're all seeking that at the end of the day.
• 14:12
  Tracy: Uh- Yeah … we might think we're a lone wolf, but, uh, but ultimately, and maybe that's true to some degree, but as human beings we're tribal beings and we, and connection and community are really important, right?
• 14:25
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 14:26
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 14:27
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 14:27
  Andrea: So it is, it is always a bit hard to, to explain to people that never heard of it, a constellation work, but I find that mostly people find me through word of mouth.
• 14:41
  Andrea: So-and-so told me, or I've seen… Sometimes people say, "I've seen it online advertised." And then once I even had, you wouldn't believe me, a person that was traveling.
• 14:53
  Andrea: Hang on.
• 14:54
  Andrea: Was she from Brazil or Ecuador?
• 14:55
  Andrea: Now I have so many different… Like, I think it was Brazil.
• 15:00
  Andrea: So she traveled.
• 15:01
  Andrea: She's, her friends overseas told her about the Another Self movie, and she started watching that.
• 15:09
  Andrea: And then she just wanted to see someone, and she done went to somebody for a massage, and that person recommended her to come and see me.
• 15:20
  Tracy: Mm. Yep, the field is pulling them in, right?
• 15:23
  Andrea: And so it is quite interesting how they do come.
• 15:27
  Andrea: It's just, I just, wherever they come from is, I just in- Mm … you know, invite them, and see them usually in our little cabin.
• 15:36
  Andrea: We have a little space now at home.
• 15:38
  Andrea: It's definitely easier when, when the, when the weather is not really playing the You know, laying the path in winter so- Mm It's
• 15:47
  Tracy: good'cause you have, you, from my understanding, I haven't been to your place but I know that we've had a, a number of conversations.
• 15:53
  Tracy: We've had quite a few over the years but- Yeah … you're, you have quite a bit of native land around you and, yeah, a beautiful setting for people to come into to- Yeah … receive and have a constellation with you.
• 16:05
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 16:06
  Andrea: I always make sure that we, that I check with the person, like how much time have you got, and I don't know.
• 16:13
  Andrea: It's, I don't really do things very standard.
• 16:15
  Andrea: I don't see people back to back yet.
• 16:19
  Andrea: Mm. But it is more that I check how much time have they got and would they like to go if the weather allows for a little walk, a wander.
• 16:29
  Andrea: Because it kind of just relaxes you that, oh- Mm … I'm not just here to get down to this, um, serious dumb thing that I'm trying to remove out of my life, because that doesn't work anyway.
• 16:40
  Andrea: You can't remove things.
• 16:42
  Andrea: You can just kind of go with it and, and kind of just- Mm … work with it and yeah.
• 16:49
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 16:50
  Tracy: I have this, uh, we've got quite a bit of… Well, you've been to my place.
• 16:53
  Tracy: There's quite a bit- Yes … of, um, native bush down the end of the property, three acres of it actually, and there's a place in there where my husband and I got married.
• 17:03
  Tracy: And I have talked to the, to the‹nahiri›, to the bush, about can we keep this clear of any plants growing?
• 17:10
  Tracy: So I don't pull anything out.
• 17:12
  Andrea: Yes.
• 17:12
  Tracy: But nothing grow-, but nothing grows in the area because I said, "This is where I wa- I bring people. This is where I go to come into the space and receive from the grandmothers, to receive," and the ancestors around me.
• 17:26
  Tracy: And so the space has stayed clear.
• 17:30
  Tracy: Occasionally, sometimes I'll take someone down there and there might have been like a branch has fallen down or there's a, a whole lot of, there's a big cluster of leaf litter or something.
• 17:39
  Tracy: So it's almost like that for me, the, the bush, the, the ‹nahiri› is already talking to the client as well.
• 17:47
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 17:47
  Tracy: Um, just with what we come across when we go through.
• 17:50
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 17:51
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 17:51
  Andrea: I remember you took, um, Honey and I. Mm. Excellent.
• 17:54
  Andrea: Really, really special place.
• 17:56
  Andrea: So I do probably because of that as well, it's, it's been empowering for me to see, ah, Tracy does, you know, outside, you know- Mm constellation and it's important.
• 18:08
  Andrea: Because for me it's like breath and blinking and breathing and, and eating and, like, functioning.
• 18:17
  Andrea: It's, it's part of- Of, uh, what we do.
• 18:20
  Andrea: So one client in particular, we went and fed the chickens after.
• 18:26
  Andrea: I've got these, um, corn cobs.
• 18:28
  Andrea: I had them, I've fed them now all.
• 18:30
  Andrea: Uh, from previous years.
• 18:32
  Andrea: They kind of crossed and they weren't… It's supposed to be heritage seeds, but I obviously did do a little bit of a silly thing and planted them all in a couple of rows.
• 18:41
  Andrea: They crossed, and so they were like this type and strawberry this and rainbow corn and a bit ups- you know, a, a bit of a hit and miss.
• 18:50
  Andrea: And I put them in a bucket thinking,"Ugh, that's a failure." Until one day I thought, "I'll feed them to my chickens.
• 18:56
  Andrea: My hens will love it." So that became part of the constellation work that in the end, if people were open, we would go and, um, peel off the cob some corn to the chickens.
• 19:09
  Andrea: And one lady said to me,"What, what is it I'm doing?" I'm like, "You're nourishing and feeding the chickens." You know, because sometimes people come and they feel really like… They say they feel like they're floating above the ground.
• 19:23
  Andrea: They don't feel earthed.
• 19:25
  Andrea: So better placed in being out in the nature and doing something meaningful like feeding the chickens and then they think you're Father Christmas because,"Oh, they get so excited to see you and,and then suddenly you just feel like really bubbly and, and connected." Are you
• 19:42
  Tracy: doing this before a constellation or after?
• 19:45
  Andrea: Sometimes I've done it after, yeah.
• 19:47
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 19:47
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 19:48
  Andrea: And one lady, because she was quite- Sort of slightly like disassociate it maybe.
• 19:55
  Andrea: I got her to pearl them into a bowl as we were chatting.
• 20:02
  Andrea: Just to do something.
• 20:03
  Andrea: I suppose it's little… I integrate little things that I learned when I worked at Steiner Kindergarten.
• 20:09
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 20:10
  Andrea: You know, get it just in your ha- in your being because we, like we used to tell the, I used to tell the children they had little brains at the end of their, their fingers.
• 20:19
  Andrea: So just doing something with the fingers brings you out of your, "I've got to solve this problem in my head," you know?
• 20:26
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 20:27
  Andrea: And with some of your fingers just pearl, pearl.
• 20:30
  Andrea: They arrive in the glass bowl and,
• 20:32
  Tracy: yeah.
• 20:32
  Tracy: Brings you back, hey.
• 20:33
  Andrea: Yes.
• 20:33
  Andrea: Yeah, so I do all sort of funny things.
• 20:36
  Andrea: Sometimes I do a restorative, um, yoga prac- uh, poses to get people to just, um, just depends on what they need really.
• 20:45
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 20:45
  Andrea: To get them to be in their body, yeah.
• 20:49
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 20:50
  Tracy: Well, you know, we all have these amazing tools in our kete, in our, in our toolbox.
• 20:55
  Tracy: So, um, why not integrate them, right?
• 20:58
  Tracy: If they're, if they are a, a beautiful complement to the work.
• 21:03
  Tracy: Mm.
• 21:03
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 21:04
  Andrea: And I think it's, it's been really… So back to the where, where I suddenly started seeing groups of… I always thought groups, that's something like for people like Tracy, you know?
• 21:17
  Andrea: They do big groups.
• 21:18
  Andrea: It's like… And then I went, came to my first, um, intensive in Taupō, and I came out the other end completely different.
• 21:27
  Andrea: And I was like, never mind about me not being thinking I could do this, it's people, people need this.
• 21:33
  Andrea: Mm. Like, group is so much more powerful.
• 21:36
  Andrea: If you don't want to work on something, you just sit back and, ah, hello, you just got a little healing from the distance.
• 21:44
  Andrea: You know, even the ones, they're like, "Oh, I'm really skeptic about that," or something.
• 21:48
  Andrea: It's just a, a flow.
• 21:50
  Andrea: It just was like a no-brainer.
• 21:52
  Andrea: And I also met, um, a family constellation practitioner from Nelson, and we kept in touch.
• 22:02
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 22:03
  Andrea: Um, and I think it helped me to just keep doing it.
• 22:09
  Andrea: I just thought- Yeah … I don't need to actually think about it.
• 22:13
  Andrea: I just set it up regularly once a month, not too much.
• 22:18
  Andrea: Um, and it actually, yeah, it just really pulled me in.
• 22:22
  Andrea: It gave me that it's not actually about me, it's about people having that added opportunity to not just be with me and with… I use mats.
• 22:34
  Andrea: I use these kind of Hessian-looking mats when it's just me and the client.
• 22:39
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 22:41
  Andrea: And sometimes I would say to them,"Ah, this would be such a beautiful-" seen right now if you were in a group.
• 22:47
  Andrea: Like, if you ever get to, to, um, go to the intensive or to a big, big group, we could now, you know, have your whole female line behind you, and it's not just a couple of mats and feel.
• 23:00
  Andrea: You know, it's still… You can still re- you can still create that feeling, as you would know, but it's just so much more powerful-
• 23:09
  Tracy: Mm … if
• 23:10
  Andrea: you're set up with, like, real people.
• 23:13
  Andrea: Um, it's just… Yeah, it's that sort of… It just-
• 23:16
  Tracy: I think, I think they're, they're both powerful in different ways.
• 23:20
  Andrea: Yes.
• 23:20
  Tracy: And sometimes you need those extra… You need people around you to, um… It's good to have people around you to have that other layer of, of experience.
• 23:29
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 23:29
  Tracy: And sometimes for people it's just like, uh, the intimacy is quite, is important as well.
• 23:35
  Tracy: So it's really-
• 23:36
  Andrea: It
• 23:36
  Tracy: has its place … what's going on for me.
• 23:37
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 23:38
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 23:38
  Andrea: Like, I re- when I think of myself, I, I would, um, quite happily work just with me and, like, one-on-one.
• 23:47
  Andrea: Like, because there were issues, like, I don't really want to tell all these issues.
• 23:51
  Andrea: Like another layer to do with my mom, and another one, and another one.
• 23:55
  Andrea: I didn't really think that the world needed to know.
• 23:59
  Andrea: But then as I went along and observed in group settings how it works and how I was touched and it wasn't even my story, I was like, "What is this?
• 24:11
  Andrea: This is bigger.
• 24:12
  Andrea: This is like…" So it is a little bit that intimacy, and lots of people do come first to one-on-ones.
• 24:20
  Andrea: And there, there is no- nothing wrong with that because it is, it is still making a choice.
• 24:27
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 24:28
  Andrea: It is making a choice that there's got… I know there's got to be something else, and here I am now, and what is… What, what could be?
• 24:39
  Andrea: So people have to have that ripe- readiness, ripeness.
• 24:43
  Andrea: A bit like a, a fruit, I suppose.
• 24:45
  Andrea: You can prematurely pick it and let it ripen in the basket, but actually it's really nice when people just go with this- Um, feeling themself be- because they, I'm not here to hurry something along.
• 24:59
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 25:00
  Andrea: And I think I've learned that a lot in, in your, um, constellations when I get a, a sense of people want an out.
• 25:09
  Andrea: They want to p- push for an outcome, and I would say something like what I overheard you say, that there, we don't need to have a end result.
• 25:18
  Andrea: It's not a … I think once you said something about a Walt Disney happy ending or something.
• 25:23
  Andrea: We don't need that.
• 25:25
  Andrea: Because it's really actually taken a lot of, given me a lot of freedom practicing that.
• 25:31
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 25:32
  Andrea: And then it takes m- my head out of it as well.
• 25:35
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 25:36
  Andrea: Because suddenly my ego goes, "Well, what now?
• 25:39
  Andrea: What now?
• 25:39
  Andrea: I, that's not perfect.
• 25:40
  Andrea: That's far beyond perfect.
• 25:42
  Andrea: This person doesn't want to even say, 'You're my mother and I'm your son,' or whatever." Mm-hmm.
• 25:47
  Andrea: They, they don't want to say that.
• 25:48
  Andrea: I'm like, oh.
• 25:50
  Andrea: So because I have gone through all these things.
• 25:53
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 25:53
  Andrea: I'm a newbie really.
• 25:54
  Andrea: I'm, I'm quite new to this.
• 25:56
  Andrea: I'm not like a 25-year practitioner, but I still, I, I still feel the growth from, um, where I was in the beginning, quite confused.
• 26:06
  Andrea: Why didn't it go that way?
• 26:08
  Andrea: And I would ring someone up in the constellation, one of my constellation colleagues, and say, "That didn't go to plan.
• 26:14
  Andrea: Did I do something wrong?" Or I think in my very, very first one-on-ones,"Did I, did I further traumatize this person?" I remember saying that.
• 26:25
  Andrea: Like, this person had cancer, and like, I really don't want to do any more damage.
• 26:29
  Andrea: And she's like, "No, no. That's, that's your inner child is quite protective."
• 26:35
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 26:36
  Tracy: And
• 26:36
  Andrea: I went, "Oh, okay. Yeah."
• 26:39
  Tracy: Great that you even had that reflection to look back and say, "Oh, what did I do?" You
• 26:46
  Andrea: know?
• 26:46
  Andrea: Always.
• 26:47
  Andrea: ' Tracy: Cause that's part And part of the e- evolution.
• 26:50
  Andrea: It's like, okay.
• 26:51
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 26:52
  Andrea: What can I learn today?
• 26:53
  Andrea: What, what, what else?
• 26:54
  Andrea: I was, um … Last year I went to Mexico and I saw Ingela Rangel, who I had seen many years ago, a couple of times actually, and she come, she went … And I'd go to the intensives every year over there.
• 27:09
  Andrea: And, um, and I had this constellation where she put my mother behind me and my mother leant on me.
• 27:16
  Andrea: She put her mother behind her and she leant on her, and it went 20 generations before- Wow … there was an ancestor that could stand up.
• 27:24
  Andrea: And she said, "Ah, there's so much work to do here, Tracy." And I was like, I was feeling it, 'cause there was, there was stuff going on for me at the m- at the time.
• 27:35
  Andrea: And sh- then she tapped me on the shoulder and she says, "Now you go home and do some homework." And I was like, "What?" And I felt like, oh, okay.
• 27:45
  Andrea: Hmm.
• 27:45
  Andrea: I was brave enough to go and do it, and I did, I did do the week.
• 27:48
  Andrea: Anyway, I saw her in Mexico, and I said to her, "You might not remember me, but this is what happened." And she looked at me and she says, "And?" And I said, "And it was the best thing you could have done.
• 28:03
  Andrea: Thank you." She says, "Ex- a- absolutely.
• 28:05
  Andrea: I wasn't gonna fix it for you.
• 28:07
  Andrea: That was your job to do the work." Yep.
• 28:10
  Tracy: I was like, "Yeah, yeah." At the time, I was a little shocked and gala 'cause, you know- Mm-hmm … I was feeling vulnerable and unresourced.
• 28:18
  Tracy: But, um, but I could see there was an ancestor.
• 28:22
  Tracy: Even though it was 20 generations back, I could still see that there was someone, and so that was the, what was the impetus, impetus?
• 28:30
  Tracy: Im- that has helped me move forward.
• 28:34
  Andrea: Yep.
• 28:35
  Andrea: Nice.
• 28:37
  Andrea: It's… I'm really glad that, that you're saying this because I've had, at some stage, to tell people that I'm not here to fix things, in a, in a very nice way.
• 28:49
  Andrea: Because I'm an empath, I would probably not say it like that.
• 28:53
  Andrea: I would be very, very, very, um, like I would then utilize what they were so annoyed about their lover or whatever it was, um, and say, "So this, what you're telling me, this reaction, does that remind you of something in your life?" And then she's like, "Well, yes. Well, I…" And so that's what we worked on.
• 29:18
  Andrea: But I felt like really, like, uncomfortable.
• 29:20
  Andrea: I was like, "Ooh, this person is coming a long way to see me," and, like, I don't want to disappoint.
• 29:27
  Andrea: But I knew I wasn't.
• 29:28
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 29:28
  Andrea: I knew deep down that it was gonna go right.
• 29:31
  Tracy: We have to trust the field, right?
• 29:33
  Tracy: We have to trust what shows up and trust that the client is gonna receive what they need to receive.
• 29:40
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 29:40
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 29:41
  Tracy: Um, yeah, it's, it's not our job to fix them.
• 29:43
  Tracy: It's, uh, it… They've come to us 'cause they want some clarity and they need to be able to see things differently, or they wish to see things differently, hopefully.
• 29:52
  Tracy: Sometimes they come with that and th- it comes out.
• 29:55
  Tracy: That's what they say, but their actions can be a little bit more, you know, m- like they've got the handbrake on.
• 30:02
  Andrea: Yes.
• 30:03
  Tracy: So.
• 30:03
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 30:04
  Tracy: It, it's a, it's a fine little dance we do, isn't it?
• 30:07
  Andrea: Yes.
• 30:08
  Andrea: Mm. Yes.
• 30:08
  Andrea: And so for, for me as a new person to this work, I'm always really grateful when I have these moments.
• 30:19
  Tracy: Mm.
• 30:20
  Andrea: Because it makes me go reflect and then go, "Did I… How did I respond to this and could I have done this different?" And, or, or just saying to myself, "You done good.
• 30:32
  Andrea: It's… You done actually really good.
• 30:34
  Andrea: You didn't see this come and you had to, um, address that." That we can't- Mm … especially when there's a person that's really not into astrology and is not really into family constellation and stuff- And we want to, um, so much work on them to accept the things we cannot change, but we can have the courage to change ourselves.
• 30:58
  Andrea: Mm. And the wisdom to know the difference.
• 31:00
  Andrea: So it's very powerful to then exactly that, that we don't seem to be getting To work on, on this gnarly kind of situation.
• 31:13
  Tracy: Mm.
• 31:13
  Andrea: Or not.
• 31:14
  Andrea: Some people don't wanna work on it, and they may not come back.
• 31:16
  Andrea: They think, "Ugh, I need some practitioner that tells me does and this," or… Also people ask me do- how often do I need to come back?
• 31:25
  Andrea: I had this lately.
• 31:27
  Tracy: I've had that too, yeah.
• 31:28
  Tracy: People are asking.
• 31:29
  Tracy: I think they're often used to talk therapy and stuff like that.
• 31:33
  Tracy: And I don't know what your response is.
• 31:35
  Tracy: For me, I just say, "Uh, when you feel like the next layer's there."
• 31:39
  Andrea: Oh, I'm so glad.
• 31:40
  Andrea: I'm so glad that it's kind of like a little bit like a mentoring session too, eh, Tracy?
• 31:46
  Andrea: Because I feel like I'm so confirmed.
• 31:48
  Andrea: You know, sometimes I'm a bit guided with the, a bit blindly guided, but I know it's right.
• 31:54
  Andrea: I know that it's- Mm … my intentions are right.
• 31:57
  Andrea: I don't let people out the door half undone because they do usually, uh, keep in contact with them, and that is my main, you know, intention to wrap them in some sort of loving support that they just do what they can do.
• 32:15
  Andrea: And because I'm lucky I have studied astrology, um, I don't know if I'm lucky or not, but I know where my Neptune placement is and, um, little awareness that my teacher when I started said.
• 32:30
  Andrea: That I said, "What does this mean?" And, um, Neptune in the 6th house in Scorpio.
• 32:36
  Andrea: Yeah, when you do start working with people, just make sure you don't take them too deep.
• 32:41
  Andrea: And I always kind of imagine the snorkel situation where some people just put on the gear and they go,"Oh, whoopsie, it's very deep indeed.
• 32:51
  Andrea: Oh, I'll, I'll go and have a, a nice shower now and get changed." Or, or there's the ones- Mm … they're like, "Whoa, let's go," when they just go down and they don't stop before they're on the bottom.
• 33:05
  Andrea: But it is my job to make sure that they only go as far as they have air capacity and that they can function.
• 33:13
  Andrea: So it stayed with me as a, as a little supportive little something, not from constellation, but it helps me in constellations.
• 33:22
  Andrea: That I have a tendency to go right while we're out here.
• 33:26
  Andrea: We're right here at the core of all cores, and we all see the rocks at the bottom and the treasures.
• 33:32
  Andrea: Like, it's not about me, it is about the person.
• 33:36
  Andrea: When they do go, um, into healing, they need to be able to still function in their world, and I learned that straight away- Mm … with mothers.
• 33:45
  Andrea: My first group was with Steiner mothers.
• 33:48
  Andrea: I knew them all, and they knew me and- We had a dog on the field there as well, and it was… I did say to them, I really respect them taking this chunk out of their day where their children have to be babysat, they have to prepare meals, they… It's a big thing, you know?
• 34:06
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 34:07
  Andrea: And so I just said to them, "Look, it's a bit like we have this time and we're not…" Like say if we're a mechanic, we don't take the whole car apart, even we- that probably does need doing, and that and that and that and this and that as well.
• 34:22
  Andrea: But we're just focusing on getting this water topped up for the radiator or whatever it is, and then go,"Ooh, that could be done next." So that was my learning, to just dip in with the time that we have provided.
• 34:37
  Andrea: So my, my circle time's quite short compared to other circles.
• 34:42
  I just make them from 10: 00 to 2:00 At the moment.
• 34:46
  I just make them from 10: Yeah, because I found sometimes whole day things for me are very exhausting.
• 34:53
  I just make them from 10: When I'm a participant, I'm like, "Oh, I'm feeling really constellated and brained out."
• 35:00
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 35:01
  Tracy: I, I love whole days.
• 35:02
  Tracy: That's-
• 35:03
  Andrea: Yeah… Tracy: just how I go.
• 35:04
  Andrea: But, um, I love that analogy as well that you've just shared.
• 35:08
  Andrea: You know, like a mechanic, you're not taking the whole car apart.
• 35:11
  Andrea: You're just, uh, topping up the water or changing the oil or fixing… You're doing something with the transmission maybe.
• 35:18
  Andrea: Um- Yeah.
• 35:19
  Tracy: Yeah, that's great.
• 35:20
  Tracy: That's beautiful.
• 35:21
  Andrea: It's just having that respect where people are at.
• 35:24
  Andrea: And I think I heard you say that sometimes, don't know where exactly, sometimes I wish my mind would reference to, say, Taupo this and this, you said that and that.
• 35:36
  Andrea: But I heard you say something on the lines of, um, sometimes, um, less is more.
• 35:43
  Tracy: Mm.
• 35:43
  Andrea: Because in the beginning, I was like, "Oh, my goodness, this person has all this issue and that and that and that." Like, and I was trying to do a boom, boom, like, a one sort of session covering everything.
• 35:56
  Tracy: One and done.
• 35:57
  Tracy: One
• 35:58
  Andrea: and done.
• 35:58
  Andrea: It just didn't work.
• 35:59
  Andrea: A- and actually, I get better each time.
• 36:03
  Andrea: Mm. Just really reining it in and saying it to the person, "See, this indicates we could go there, but this has to be for another time." I also heard Leslie, Leslie-
• 36:15
  Tracy: Nips
• 36:16
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 36:17
  Andrea: Leslie Nips say that as well.
• 36:19
  Tracy: Mm.
• 36:19
  Andrea: When we were tr- uh, sort of was, like, constellating, but it was also training.
• 36:24
  Andrea: She was talking to us, like, because we're all trained and, um, and I thought, yeah, so each time I meet it, I j- I know I have to overcome that inner,"Let's get this all done," you know?
• 36:39
  Andrea: Let's just concentrate on this really good here.
• 36:43
  Andrea: It's very important just for… Maybe I gauge the energy of the person, because always scanning, always scanning the, the energy volume that the person holds.
• 36:54
  Andrea: Are they like… How they, how are they closed in, or are they ready to look for more?
• 37:01
  Tracy: Oh, that's right.
• 37:02
  Tracy: You're reading the field.
• 37:04
  Tracy: You're reading the body language.
• 37:05
  Tracy: You're reading the energetics of it and the, and, and also what they're saying, too, right?
• 37:11
  Tracy: The language that they're using as well.
• 37:13
  Andrea: Yes.
• 37:14
  Andrea: Totally.
• 37:14
  Andrea: Mm.
• 37:14
  Andrea: It's like that… It… I love this about this work.
• 37:18
  Andrea: It's like the language has a different ring.
• 37:22
  Andrea: Sometimes we say something, we think it maybe, but when you say it in a group, it's, it, it takes on a different- Um, shape.
• 37:32
  Andrea: Because once it's said, then you can again, this and this has been said, and then people represent.
• 37:40
  Andrea: And then if they don't like it, you again have that choice in yourself and in your time, a bit like what you experienced if you had to go home and do your work.
• 37:51
  Andrea: You know, when you're ready.
• 37:53
  Andrea: It's not like right now to make the facilitator happy, you've got to do it ri- It's, it happens when it does.
• 37:59
  Tracy: Uh, yeah.
• 37:59
  Tracy: And I think too, you know, that for me that situation, there was so many layers.
• 38:05
  Tracy: Not just that there were 20 women that, you know, the, the 19 in b- in between, but there were so many layers to getting, um… And probably still are more that I haven't, that are, that are still evolving.
• 38:17
  Tracy: But, um, there wouldn't have been time for a one and done because- No it was so involved.
• 38:24
  Tracy: So taking the bite that you can take, taking what- What … what, what's there on the surface, what needs to be addressed today.
• 38:32
  Tracy: So I came home and I, and I c- um, I got my markers out and I put them on the floor for each one, and then I stood with each one and asked them what did they need.
• 38:43
  Tracy: And, um, and then just put in some resources for, for what came through for me at the time.
• 38:49
  Tracy: And, and I left it at that for, 'cause I needed them to feel some resource so that I could breathe and take a step back and then come forward to it again.
• 39:00
  Tracy: So, yeah.
• 39:02
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 39:03
  Andrea: Amazing.
• 39:04
  Tracy: Important.
• 39:04
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 39:04
  Tracy: It's an important, uh, lesson that was.
• 39:06
  Tracy: Um-
• 39:07
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 39:07
  Andrea: And they do stay with us.
• 39:09
  Andrea: And I think, you know, back to the question why, um, why I'm even doing this is because I could really feel it sh- it shifted something in me-
• 39:20
  Tracy: Mm-hmm… Andrea: how I was with- My people to my family, or one particular was a relationship I had with toxins because I was quite sick around that time.
• 39:35
  Tracy: I had a lot of thyroid issues, and I didn't… I wouldn't say that I'd use family constellation just as, you know, the medicine, but it was a big part of my medicine because we identified that I had a really strong, um, kind of almost like a love connection to toxins, you know?
• 39:58
  Tracy: Mm. Not absorbing goodness from good food very easily like iron and, um, and things, but toxins seemed to come in.
• 40:07
  Tracy: But then again, it's the placement in my chart as well, that Neptune, um, a little bit in weakness.
• 40:15
  Tracy: So it is just knowing about self.
• 40:19
  Tracy: And so I don't expect constellation to do a deep, you know, clean and all and done and over and dusted anymore because I have received gifts like two, three years after the work that we done one on one.
• 40:36
  Tracy: Mm. For a long time, Joe was doing one-on-ones with me, uh, in, in, you know, reasonable spaces apart, and, um, and they would… That's really what then pulled me to do this work.
• 40:50
  Tracy: Mm. It's like, wow, if this can help me, this could potentially, you know, if somebody's brave enough to look.
• 40:58
  Tracy: It's interesting how some people think it's a very serious thing, so I've got, um, one lady that gave me such a good review.
• 41:06
  Tracy: It's, it's so good.
• 41:07
  Tracy: It will go on my website that I'm still… Like, it's still in development.
• 41:13
  Tracy: But it's… She just ma- sort of says it like it's, you can laugh, and you can giggle, and you can… You have tears, and you, um- Mm … in a way, you love people after a co- group constellation.
• 41:27
  Tracy: I mean, we always say that when we have the… Like when, when you do the, um, the intensives.
• 41:33
  Tracy: It's like at first you're strangers, and suddenly you're like, just love everybody at, at this- Yeah, at the end of it your heart's open to the other 80 people in the room, and
• 41:44
  Andrea: that's nice.
• 41:44
  Andrea: Ah, and that is, that is the… It's like it's not just about,"Yeah, let's dig in that ugly bit and cut it out and get rid of it." It's actually, I think, one of the really beautiful constellations, it was like fragments helping the woman to claim the fragments of herself that she- Mm … dropped on the way in a very intense situation.
• 42:09
  Andrea: Like, it was really quite intense, and I don't really wanna go too much into it, but it's, it, it's… It was just the field was wanting to give- Her, her higher self and her younger self and her, her ego self and, and suddenly she was really resourced with her own self.
• 42:33
  Andrea: And I did say to her, "There is other fragments that we haven't even talked about today that you may, you know, re- regain back." Because when we go through trauma and we have, we sort of leave parts of ourselves behind because, ugh, let's just not, you know, go there.
• 42:54
  Andrea: And then suddenly we wonder why at a certain age we're struggling to manage because we kind of, um… Yeah, it's often the resourcing comes from within.
• 43:04
  Andrea: That's what I just find that I go to bed really super happy and just think, "Oh, that was just delicious, that group one that we had , you know?" Because of- Mm… of them realizing it comes from within.
• 43:18
  Andrea: It's not necessary good facilitation.
• 43:22
  Andrea: It's as good as they open up
• 43:26
  Tracy: I think resourcing is so important.
• 43:28
  Tracy: You know, like if someone hasn't… If someone has experienced a lot of trauma or is very fragmented, disconnected to themselves, then i- it's like when things are leaking, right?
• 43:38
  Tracy: So there's often, often resources are not something that, uh, i- is even available to them- Yeah … at the time.
• 43:45
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 43:46
  Tracy: So when we can guide them to, to rediscovering the resources and reconnecting to parts maybe or to maybe even tapping into a grandmother that was avail- that energetically was actually available to them or, or to their, to their pet when they were five years old when the traumatic event happened, and that pet was the one that gave them the c- you know, the con- uh, the love and the support that they needed.
• 44:14
  Tracy: That's a resource but we- Yeah… sometimes we forget about those things.
• 44:17
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 44:18
  Andrea: And that's beautiful.
• 44:19
  Andrea: Thanks, Tracy, for saying that because they, when they remember that, they, they go back and that sort of, it's that beautiful somatic wisdom that's within- Mm-hmm … their own fields that they then see it's not just trauma, it's that they also got skilled in a, in a way.
• 44:39
  Andrea: It's just how do they, how does that play out, and how much power do they let this, um, situation or these moments have over them.
• 44:50
  Andrea: And I have to say I'm quite fascinated, and if it wasn't for a bit of health stuff last, in the last year, um, I probably would have done some training with Nir because I'm very fascinated by the shadow work.
• 45:05
  Andrea: I think that could really nicely go together with constellation.
• 45:10
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 45:10
  Tracy: Well, you… Did you know that Nir's coming to Aotearoa?
• 45:14
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 45:14
  Tracy: He's gonna be here for our next immersion.
• 45:17
  Andrea: Wow.
• 45:18
  Andrea: Wow.
• 45:19
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 45:20
  Andrea: That's interesting to know.
• 45:21
  Tracy: So next April he'll be here.
• 45:22
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 45:23
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 45:23
  Tracy: And that's good.
• 45:24
  Tracy: The, his, his shadow work is amazing.
• 45:26
  Andrea: Yeah, because I've got a affinity with the Jung and, um, work because my grandad was-- I've got all his books.
• 45:34
  Tracy: Mm.
• 45:35
  Andrea: Not that, not that I've read them all, Tracy, but I've got them all.
• 45:38
  Andrea: I made sure they didn't throw them away.
• 45:40
  Andrea: And he talked to me about Jung.
• 45:43
  Andrea: And we talked about the stuff that probably granddads and granddaughters don't really usually talk about, supernatural stuff.
• 45:51
  Andrea: And everybody else probably would have thought that's a little bit, you know, far-fetched, but, oh, I was just right there.
• 45:59
  Andrea: You had me on-
• 46:00
  Tracy: Do you know, do you know what I do with books?
• 46:01
  Tracy: And I think I've, I've said this before on the podcast, maybe, I don't know.
• 46:05
  Tracy: I talk to so many different people about different things.
• 46:09
  Tracy: Is sometimes if I, um… I, I have got lots of books, and I haven't read them all, but I've read m- a good chunk of them.
• 46:16
  Tracy: But sometimes when I feel like I need support, because when someone writes a book, they're putting… Those thoughts are out there, right there in the consciousness already.
• 46:26
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 46:26
  Tracy: The book is a physical vessel which has the words written on them, but the, the, all the information's already out there in the, in the… So sometimes I'll just, I might make a circle with the books.
• 46:36
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 46:36
  Tracy: And I might, and I might sit in it or stand in it or, um, sometimes I'll put the books around me or in my bedroom- Yes… and, and sleep with that energy as well.
• 46:48
  Tracy: So I'm very mindful around the, the types of books that I keep in my bedroom.
• 46:51
  Tracy: You know, not into the murder mysteries and stuff like that to be sleeping with.
• 46:56
  Tracy: I don't mind watching the occasional one on telly, but, um, but when I'm seeking to soak up more information and, um, and just have that support and wisdom and just knowing that, because it's already out there in the field, right?
• 47:08
  Tracy: And we can trust that what the field, okay, so what, what… Come and stand with me.
• 47:13
  Tracy: Come and be with me and sh- and share this information.
• 47:15
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 47:16
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 47:17
  Andrea: Yeah, because my granddad would actually talk to me.
• 47:22
  Andrea: He read the books, and he would… So I still digested them on a, I don't know, I… Is it digested?
• 47:27
  Andrea: It's, I kind of absorbed-
• 47:28
  Tracy: Mm… Andrea: that- Of my granddad and, oh, That's very difficult.
• 47:38
  Tracy: You're like, "Okay, what did I read again?" And you read it and read the page and i- it makes sense, but it's a bit like reading Rudolf Steiner sometimes.
• 47:47
  Tracy: I read a lot of Rudolf Steiner.
• 47:49
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 47:50
  Tracy: But sometimes it's like you actually gotta take it into a dream, and then in the morning you're like, "Oh, that's what that was meaning to be." Interesting.
• 47:57
  Tracy: Because words can get really stuck in a sort of a brain level, and I think that is why I like very, very much, I love it.
• 48:07
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 48:08
  Tracy: I love family constellation because the brain's like, "Okay.
• 48:11
  Tracy: No, no, we're not talking about you right now.
• 48:14
  Tracy: It's there.
• 48:15
  Tracy: We…" It's a somatic, it's a somatic experience.
• 48:19
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 48:19
  Tracy: And I somatically experienced my granddad was very unusual, and he would disappear in his room with these books.
• 48:28
  Tracy: So they were very mysterious to me.
• 48:31
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 48:31
  Tracy: And then when they were threatened to be chucked out, I'm like, "Well." My dad said, "Have you read any of them?
• 48:37
  Tracy: That's very hard.
• 48:38
  Tracy: It's gobbledygook, can hardly understand it." But then he kept one of them, which is the Mandala, which is… I really want that, that book.
• 48:47
  Tracy: So it's, it's just fascinating how it all can marry into- Mm-hmm … constellation work.
• 48:54
  Tracy: And,
• 48:55
  Andrea: and we had, um, in, in March when my dad was still here, we had a photo shoot here with Mareike and we done… It was the, um, the longest day so we done a, um, like a mandala with flowers and leaves and things.
• 49:14
  Andrea: We ran couple of little workshops and we done, um, you know, to do with the Mara Mataka.
• 49:21
  Andrea: Honey was doing a bit of, um, presenting.
• 49:23
  Andrea: And we've lately been in a, in a magazine on the land.
• 49:28
  Andrea: The, the work of the mandala is, is very powerful, and we done it in a seasonal, um, situation where we integrated it into a photo shoot, little mini workshops, little beginning karakia, and it just was amazing.
• 49:46
  Andrea: It's just simplicity really.
• 49:48
  Andrea: Mm. It's simple things, like putting leaves in a circle honoring the, the seasons really.
• 49:56
  Andrea: So I'm, I'm very big on, on that, and I appreciate all the facilitator that I experience that do these kind of things.
• 50:04
  Andrea: I mean, pretty much everybody brings their own flavors to it, and I kind of pick what stays with me.
• 50:13
  Andrea: Bit of Maria, bit of Margherita, um, lots of Tracy.
• 50:19
  Andrea: And yet I still haven't done a drum yet, and sometimes I actually say to my participants,"Can you please bring your drum?
• 50:27
  Andrea: We need the drum today." Like, I don't even know why, but… And then, yeah, she turns up with a drum and I'm like, "I'm yet to make one."
• 50:37
  Tracy: Yet.
• 50:37
  Andrea: Because it's just- Yeah … it's spending that time.
• 50:40
  Andrea: I mean, you could go and buy one.
• 50:42
  Andrea: That's not the same.
• 50:44
  Andrea: I'm like into do- you know, like y- to actually put your energy into something- Mm … that then makes a sound.
• 50:52
  Andrea: I can't, I can't really just go and buy one.
• 50:55
  Andrea: And, um, hers was a really nice, um, handmade one from her country so it was… It's just meaningful.
• 51:03
  Andrea: Sound can be really nicely integrated so- Yeah … I always loved how other constellation facilitators integrate sound, and sometimes I do myself with like rocks, tapping rocks together.
• 51:19
  Tracy: Great.
• 51:19
  Andrea: And because for some reason there's been a, a theme of people being feeling floaty or there has been a theme of vanishing twins which I was like,"Oh, luckily Tracy has this amazing video I can share with my clients." Because I didn't even know anything about it.
• 51:39
  Tracy: Mm-hmm.
• 51:39
  Andrea: So it's just, it's really cool to, um, to, to explore these areas with the client and l- uh, instantly whenever I have a person that brings something I'm like, "Whoa, what is that?" I c- I just suddenly have every channel open to learn more about it.
• 52:00
  Andrea: Like with Ani, Ani, um, Mukala.
• 52:02
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 52:04
  Andrea: Um, sexual abuse, quite… I've done a bit of training last year and the year before.
• 52:09
  Andrea: So she has such nice down to earth, even it's online, she has really nice down to earth ways and of, say, to bring people back when they're a little bit dissociated because she can realize, like she can spot it and yeah, it's just all these really amazing tools that, that kind of become… Sometimes I, I take them as part of my journey and then suddenly I don't do it.
• 52:37
  Andrea: Like with the- Yeah … with the, um, the friend that I met in the first intensive in Taupo.
• 52:46
  Andrea: She done her, when I went to see her in Nelson, she done her constellations like not blind.
• 52:52
  Andrea: Like you're the father and you're the mother and you're the whatever, the land.
• 52:58
  Andrea: And for a while I kind of done it like this again and sometimes the people that came in my group, they're like, "Oh, you do things differently now." But then I c- I te- have a tendency to go back to blind.
• 53:11
  Andrea: It's-
• 53:11
  Tracy: I think, I think that the field will tell you sometimes, you know, oh, this needs to be blind.
• 53:15
  Tracy: Sometimes it's like field needs to be really clear.
• 53:18
  Tracy: And, um, I haven't personally figured out why, but it's just what needs to be happening
• 53:23
  Andrea: at the time.
• 53:23
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 53:24
  Andrea: I'm glad I can do both now.
• 53:26
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 53:26
  Andrea: Because sometimes you have really, really strongly, it's like it's just got to be not blind.
• 53:32
  Andrea: And-
• 53:32
  Tracy: Yeah, exactly… Andrea: so I'm like, well, obviously about me, what I prefer, or it's about what's best for the person.
• 53:42
  Tracy: Yeah.
• 53:42
  Tracy: And so, yeah, it's very, very, very interesting, um, journey and, and I just l- love learning more and I'm h- I'm getting a little bit more busy now with one-on-one clients, which is nice.
• 53:59
  Tracy: So if someone wants to get hold of you, how would they find you?
• 54:02
  Andrea: Um, at the moment on our Instagram and Facebook.
• 54:07
  Tracy: Can you say that again?
• 54:08
  Tracy: 'Cause it, it went quiet.
• 54:10
  Andrea: Um, on the Instagram and Facebook page at the moment because-
• 54:14
  Tracy: Which is called?
• 54:15
  Andrea: Kiwi Homesteaders.
• 54:17
  Tracy: Kiwi Homesteaders.
• 54:18
  Tracy: Okay.
• 54:18
  Tracy: Yep.
• 54:19
  Andrea: They can just message me.
• 54:20
  Andrea: There is an email address, so message here, email or messenger.
• 54:26
  Tracy: And, and so if someone's looking to come to a workshop, is there information somewhere for that?
• 54:32
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 54:33
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 54:33
  Andrea: It's currently on Facebook under events.
• 54:36
  Tracy: Okay.
• 54:37
  Andrea: And I will, um… Yeah, I'm working on putting that online in a website.
• 54:41
  Andrea: Yeah, which is gonna be quite, quite a different way of doing things, so.
• 54:47
  Tracy: Mm.
• 54:48
  Andrea: It's, it's quite-
• 54:49
  Tracy: It's really putting yourself out there, isn't it?
• 54:50
  Tracy: And I love that clearing of the throat, and it, it really is.
• 54:53
  Tracy: I've… It's been part of my journey as well, like stepping out and being seen.
• 54:58
  Tracy: Um, and but that's what we're here to do- Yeah … for, um, uh, in this work, right?
• 55:06
  Tracy: To-
• 55:07
  Andrea: Yeah.
• 55:07
  Andrea: And I think I, my passion again-- It's like when I was doing one-on-one workshops by, for me to feel safe under the walnut tree, out in nature, you know, that's how I started.
• 55:20
  Andrea: And then suddenly came from a, um, intensive, like, "I've got to do groups." I'm like, "What do you mean you've got to do groups, Andrea?" You know?
• 55:29
  Andrea: So I have this call to take this online.
• 55:34
  Andrea: I haven't quite not figured it out.
• 55:35
  Andrea: If you would see the interesting setup that I have here, it's really, um, homemade.
• 55:41
  Andrea: The computer on a sort of interesting bit from the shed and, you know, it's all pretty, um, improvised.
• 55:50
  Andrea: But I have this pull to open this work up to the world because I have, one, I have also got people and friends and family overseas.
• 56:00
  Andrea: Mm-hmm.
• 56:00
  Andrea: And I easily make connections with people from other countries, and I have certainly been asked in the past from somebody in Canada could I run an online sourdough making workshop, and I just left it at, "How do you do this?
• 56:16
  Andrea: It's too hard." Well, the too hard thing doesn't cut it anymore.
• 56:20
  Andrea: It's, I'm gonna have to do it, so.
• 56:22
  Andrea: Oh,
• 56:23
  Tracy: I look forward to that.
• 56:24
  Tracy: Ah.
• 56:24
  Tracy: I look forward to seeing that, watching you, um, sharing your gifts with the world.
• 56:29
  Tracy: That's amazing.
• 56:30
  Tracy: Thank you.
• 56:31
  Tracy: Thank you so much, Andrea, for coming and sharing and, yeah, look forward to, um, just watching you thrive.
• 56:40
  Tracy: It's, it's beautiful.
• 56:42
  Andrea: Thank you, Tracey.
• 56:43
  Tracy: Thank you for listening.
• 56:44
  Tracy: Head over to Instagram and tell me what's resonated for you with this episode.
• 56:49
  Tracy: You'll find me @tracey.cartwright.
• 56:50
  Tracy: That's Tracey with no E .Cartwright.
• 56:55
  Tracy: And, or head over to my website traceycartwright.co.nz, and receive a free audio with a gift from your ancestors.
• 57:05
  Tracy: So until next time, be kind to yourself and have fun doing it.