Latest / Privycast / Ep. 111 Japanese Toilet Demons
Transcript
- 0:31>> Speaker A: Welcome back to privy. Privy is
- 0:34a podcast about bathrooms
- 0:37recorded from my home
- 0:39bathroom. I'm your host, Hunter
- 0:42Hoover, and I love bathrooms.
- 0:45And I will note, uh, last
- 0:48episode, I want to say last week, but it's more than a
- 0:51week. Last, um, episode, we were
- 0:53joined in Porta Potty
- 0:56with Josh Wehrman. And I gotta say,
- 1:00while that was fun, and I think we'll
- 1:02revisit the timber Ridge middle school Porta
- 1:05potty parking lot. Porta potty. And
- 1:08while that was fun,
- 1:10uh, recording in my own home
- 1:14is a lot better.
- 1:16Uh, Josh, next
- 1:19time, I'll have you over here. I'll get you a seltzer.
- 1:22We'll sit back, we'll record. We'll do a little record, and do a little
- 1:25hang sesh. It'll be as nice as the
- 1:27Porta potty was a little record away from
- 1:30home. I think this will be better by
- 1:33far. I think you'll find it is much
- 1:36more, uh, welcoming, if you
- 1:39will. There was something about the
- 1:41atmosphere now just the
- 1:44spider and the rat and just
- 1:47the thrill and the terror of,
- 1:52like, anytime a light came on outside the Porta potty,
- 1:55we were just scared. Um, and it really
- 1:58added to the spooky season.
- 2:01It was spooky season inside and outside that
- 2:04porta potty, especially in the blue lake that I was
- 2:07sitting on top of. Nothing scarier,
- 2:10really, truthfully, nothing
- 2:12scarier than a bacterial infection from other people's
- 2:15poops. Like, to my knowledge, neither he
- 2:18nor I have had any complications
- 2:21related to our extended stay in the Porta
- 2:24potty yet. Uh, but
- 2:27I can't believe that it isn't
- 2:30somehow bad. It seems like it
- 2:33has to have been negative in some way.
- 2:37But as we near the end
- 2:40of October, we are also rounding out
- 2:43the end of our spooky season.
- 2:46And to do so,
- 2:49we need to take a small trip
- 2:52and explore bathrooms that are
- 2:55of not here in the United States.
- 3:00But before we do that, a, uh, brief
- 3:02observation. Uh, I'm not a
- 3:05scary movie person.
- 3:08I don't really like being scared. I don't know why. But
- 3:11in the last week, my children
- 3:14have decided that scary stuff
- 3:17is fun. I don't understand it. I don't like being
- 3:20scared. My wife thinks it's hilarious to scare
- 3:23me. Um, and
- 3:26I have had people, like, at work scare me,
- 3:28and I'm one of those people that I just scream
- 3:31like a small infant girl, uh,
- 3:34whenever I get scared.
- 3:37And then I get mad, I'm, um, a
- 3:40scream and then get angry, and I just kind of stew about
- 3:43it. But I'm not a scary movie person.
- 3:46I don't like the scary movies. I don't really like
- 3:49horror when the whole shtick of
- 3:52the movie is like, oh, man, this person got
- 3:54dismembered and you were watching. How scary is that?
- 3:57Wasn't that scary? Like, oh, man, they
- 4:00removed his arm from his body.
- 4:03Wasn't that terrifying? That's not
- 4:06for me. I don't mind monster
- 4:09movies. Uh, I don't mind suspense.
- 4:13But something that I notice both
- 4:16in horror and
- 4:19scary movies, as well as, like,
- 4:22monster and suspense films,
- 4:25is they love to put movie
- 4:28like bathroom
- 4:30scenes in these movies. It is as if
- 4:33there is something inherently vulnerable about the
- 4:36bathroom in which they must
- 4:39put this very vulnerable spot
- 4:42in these kind of movies that kind of
- 4:45have a feast on one's vulnerability.
- 4:47Now, this
- 4:50is not the week for
- 4:53privy's top horror movie scenes, or why
- 4:56we even have these, but it is, however, my way
- 4:59of becoming curious and getting more and more
- 5:01curious. Uh, I will
- 5:04admit we are at the point of
- 5:07this recording, less than ten calendar days
- 5:10away from Halloween. And
- 5:14I have watched no Halloween
- 5:17movies. I have taken in no Halloween
- 5:20any sort of media, and I simply do not
- 5:23care. Now, I
- 5:26will care, but I do not. Now,
- 5:29I think the week of Halloween,
- 5:32I'll get in the weenie spirit, I'll be a real
- 5:35Halloweener. But
- 5:38that is those who Halloween
- 5:40Halloweeners. But
- 5:43I just couldn't give a flying flip about it
- 5:46right now. And
- 5:49it is, however, again, my way of getting curious
- 5:52as I think about these scary movies and the number of
- 5:55them that just have this suspenseful
- 5:58scene related to the bathroom. We
- 6:01keep putting these monsters and other scary things in the bathrooms,
- 6:04and I'm sitting down,
- 6:07they're in the bathroom, and they're sitting down with their
- 6:09little hamigo hanging out, and they're like, yeah, but
- 6:12you might get stabbed.
- 6:16I know that you're just trying to drop a chaz,
- 6:19but there's a non zero chance that somebody's going to
- 6:22sneak in and stab you. People
- 6:25have been dying on the toilets for centuries. Check out
- 6:28episode ten ish of this pod.
- 6:31But there's something vulnerable about pooping and
- 6:34being in the bathroom that makes it rife for
- 6:36horror. I've noted in the
- 6:39past, uh, that
- 6:42when I was in college, in our dorm,
- 6:44many of us in the dorm regularly
- 6:47pooped with the stall door wide open
- 6:50for fear of someone sneaking in and sneaking up on
- 6:52us. It wasn't a good defense
- 6:55mechanism, but it was a defense mechanism.
- 6:59I guess we would see an attacker before they
- 7:02attacked. Was the mindset behind that, I don't know.
- 7:06But then it got me wondering.
- 7:11This time of year, it's spooky season and there's all
- 7:14sorts of scary stories out there. So I went
- 7:16looking for some scary toilet stories
- 7:20and I was taken to a page. If you've ever
- 7:22searched Google, I know that
- 7:26Google. Have you ever heard of it? But if
- 7:29you've ever searched Google and you've visited
- 7:32a page in the past, when you
- 7:35search something on Google, it will let you know
- 7:38if you've been there. Usually as evidenced by light
- 7:41purple lettering instead of the normal blue
- 7:43that you can click. Now, when
- 7:46I typed in spooky or scary
- 7:49spoop key. Forgive me, father. Uh, spoopkey
- 7:52scary toilet stories,
- 7:55it displayed a page that it said I had already
- 7:58been to. And this is how I
- 8:00knew, uh, it was at this moment that I
- 8:03knew that my bathroom
- 8:06media and bathroom knowledge journey
- 8:08had come full circle. I have now begun
- 8:11to revisit pages that
- 8:14I have already visited for topics in the
- 8:17past.
- 8:20It was back when we discussed toilet
- 8:22deities earlier this year. Well, uh, and,
- 8:25uh, the idea is essentially this.
- 8:28If there are toilet, quote unquote
- 8:31gods, if you will, like, who
- 8:34wants that one? But whatever. Then
- 8:37you know that there are, uh, toilet
- 8:39demons.
- 8:43This week on privy, we are
- 8:46going to focus in,
- 8:50the rest are for another day, but we are going to
- 8:52focus primarily in on a
- 8:55select demographic of toilet
- 8:58demon. That is the japanese toilet
- 9:01demons. But before we can
- 9:04do that, we need to talk about something called
- 9:06Yokai. If you're like
- 9:09me and you hear the word yokai, you
- 9:12think of nothing else except for Yokai Watch. Now,
- 9:15Yokai Watch is a franchise of
- 9:17children's video games in which somebody,
- 9:21I'm gonna say namco, but I don't know if that's true, and I don't
- 9:23really care. Essentially, uh, tries to rip off
- 9:26Pokemon by making this boy that has a
- 9:29watch that can, I think, capture Yokai's.
- 9:32I'll be honest, I haven't played it and I don't care enough to figure
- 9:35it out. But when I
- 9:38hear the word yokai, that's what I think
- 9:40of Yokai watch.
- 9:44These yokais are these
- 9:46spirit like things that
- 9:49inhabit, like, other
- 9:51things, which to me just sounds
- 9:54like a giga gaga ghost. But
- 9:57it turns out Yokai
- 10:00have been around for about 1500
- 10:03years, or at least
- 10:06the idea of them, like, whether or not these things
- 10:09are real, they're not. Uh, is
- 10:12besides the point. It is people's
- 10:15discussion of and belief
- 10:18in them that dates back
- 10:201500 years in
- 10:23the 700s yokai were written
- 10:26about as seeming explanations
- 10:29to strange phenomenon in the imperial court.
- 10:32Somebody sticks their leftover
- 10:35panda express in the fridge and then it's just
- 10:38miraculously gone. Nobody ate it. Like you
- 10:40ask everybody in the house and nobody ever ate
- 10:43it. Nobody's ever
- 10:45guilty. It must be the,
- 10:48uh. And as people began to write
- 10:51about these strange disappearing
- 10:53panda express phenomenons, they
- 10:56didn't have panda Express back then. If you didn't know they didn't
- 10:59have panda Express. I don't know when panda Express started, but I
- 11:02guarantee you it wasn't back then.
- 11:05You know what else they didn't have then?
- 11:09Oh, uh,
- 11:12Seltzer, I must confess.
- 11:14Forgive me. Polar seltzer. Polar
- 11:17seltzer, I bequeathed myself to you.
- 11:20I am not suppping on your very good polar
- 11:23bear tonight. Um, tonight I
- 11:26have just freshly cracked open a
- 11:28waterloo spiked,
- 11:32wrong word spiced apple seltzer.
- 11:35So let's hit this and quit this.
- 11:38Well, I'm going to tell you this right now.
- 11:41That is no orange vanilla.
- 11:44Um, that leaves
- 11:47polar seltzer. Don't worry, your orange
- 11:49vanilla reigns supreme in my heart.
- 11:53But they assigned
- 11:56something to the description of what was causing
- 11:59this strange phenomena and they began to refer
- 12:02them as these beings called yokai.
- 12:06It would be centuries before the yokai
- 12:09themselves would be given physical descriptions,
- 12:12often as strange animals
- 12:15or element. Things that roam.
- 12:18Yokai were quite literally
- 12:20the result of folklore and
- 12:23legend, but also the result of fun
- 12:26wordplay. As stories began to be
- 12:29told of strange things happening, different
- 12:31yokai took shape. They really
- 12:34became a part and a
- 12:37standing staple of japanese
- 12:39folk stories and tales.
- 12:43Think of some of the fairy tales and folk
- 12:45stories you learned growing up to the japanese
- 12:48people. Yokai often popped up in these,
- 12:52as so often some of our tropes
- 12:55pop up in our folk stories. When
- 12:58yokai make an appearance, they are often
- 13:00mischievous or, uh, an evil entity.
- 13:04And as is often the case, they also
- 13:07became a part of the Shinto
- 13:09religion in japanese belief. And from what I can
- 13:12tell, there are about as many yokai as there
- 13:15are phenomenon that you could need to describe and
- 13:18a various different yokai that you could assign to each
- 13:21phenomenon.
- 13:24It should also be noted yokai
- 13:27are said to inhabit things, or,
- 13:30as is often the case, as we're going to see this week, dwell
- 13:33within things.
- 13:36When something's going to inhabit something else, it's
- 13:39only a matter of time before there are
- 13:42yokais in your toilet.
- 13:46Now, many of these toilet
- 13:48yokais are commonly referred to as
- 13:51quote unquote, toilet demons, which I
- 13:54referred to them at the top of this show. But the
- 13:57idea of a demon is a pretty european
- 14:00idea. It is mostly our way of
- 14:02describing something in japanese culture that we
- 14:05don't really have. An equivalent for
- 14:08spirits or ghosts would be like the closest thing
- 14:11in western culture to this.
- 14:14But today we're going to explore some of
- 14:17these japanese toilet demons
- 14:20as we round out spook gee season here on
- 14:22privy. Before we begin,
- 14:27I must beg your apologies. I
- 14:30most assuredly am going to butcher the
- 14:33name of many japanese people this
- 14:35week. If you are from Japan, if you speak
- 14:38Japanese, or if your culture is japanese,
- 14:40forgive me, uh, I'm not japanese. I don't
- 14:43know the language. I can't speak it. I'm just doing my best
- 14:46as a white bearded weirdo.
- 14:49Um, but the first of our japanese toilet
- 14:52demons is Toyer
- 14:55no Hanako san.
- 14:58Young japanese children may
- 15:00often find themselves faced with the
- 15:03opportunity for strange encounters.
- 15:06A theme that's going to pop up multiple
- 15:09times this week. I think you'll find
- 15:12one of these strange encounters is with an
- 15:15entity known as Hanako san.
- 15:18Now, depending on which version of the story
- 15:21that you have heard, which
- 15:23is so true for most folktales,
- 15:26like, every folktale, I
- 15:29feel like has multiple versions which lends
- 15:31to its folkiness. Uh,
- 15:35but depending on which version of the story you listen
- 15:38to, Hanako
- 15:41san was a young girl who died
- 15:44in the stall of a school bathroom.
- 15:47Now, depending on your source and
- 15:49who you asked, there's multiple ways that she
- 15:52is said to have died. Hanako san
- 15:55could have died as a result of a failure to
- 15:58shelter. Well, during a World War II air raid.
- 16:01Rough break there. Or she
- 16:04is the spirit,
- 16:07or whatever, of a girl who was murdered by
- 16:10a staff of the school, or a parent
- 16:13in the stall of the bathroom. Or
- 16:15she was a girl who died who, at the hands
- 16:18of piers'bullying, committed
- 16:21suicide in the bathroom stall.
- 16:25Whatever the reason, as the story goes,
- 16:28Hanako san died in the bathroom. And
- 16:30so the spirit of the little girl is
- 16:33said to inhabit school
- 16:35bathrooms. As
- 16:38the folk story goes, the spirit
- 16:41dwells in the toilets of the third story
- 16:43bathroom, generally the girls
- 16:46room in japanese schools,
- 16:49you can tell how this schoolyard
- 16:52scary story gets spread like wildfire.
- 16:56Kids at recess, they're just itching to
- 16:59challenge each other to go into a bathroom and
- 17:02possibly get sucked into hell. You know what?
- 17:05It's just. It's just good fun. It's just
- 17:08good playground fun. To talk
- 17:10to this toilet demon, Hanako san,
- 17:14you enter the third story toilet. Knock
- 17:16three times on the stall door and ask if
- 17:19Hanako san is present. If
- 17:22she is, she will reply yes.
- 17:25M what happens next is the
- 17:28hoogity boogity. Some say. When she
- 17:31replies yes, you see a disembodied and
- 17:34bloody hand appear to you that will then pull
- 17:36you down through the toilet into hell.
- 17:40Rough break. Or you
- 17:43possibly are eaten by a three headed lizard monster
- 17:46for disturbing Hanaka san's peace.
- 17:49This urban legend japanese toilet spirit
- 17:52demon thing is weird. First,
- 17:55I would ask what's with the lizard? Is that the yokai
- 17:58here? And second, why is it so
- 18:00popular? Like this is
- 18:03one of those stories that gets picked up in japanese
- 18:06folklore and is propagated in japanese media.
- 18:09Like they've made movies and TV
- 18:12episodes about this type thing.
- 18:14This boopki season, if
- 18:17you have access to a school with a third
- 18:20story, go to the bathroom,
- 18:23knock on the skull, and ask for the ghost
- 18:26of a deceased little girl from 70 years ago.
- 18:30Sounds like fun,
- 18:32but this is just one of many japanese
- 18:35toilet demons or ghosts.
- 18:38The next, similar to Hanako
- 18:41san is the air quotes
- 18:43toilet demon Kashima Reiko
- 18:46or Kashima Riku.
- 18:49They exist because something happened again
- 18:52to a schoolgirl. And that begs the
- 18:55question, you know what? Jumping
- 18:58out of the spoopki mood here. What
- 19:01in the heck is going on
- 19:04with these japanese stories that there is so many
- 19:06schoolgirl schoolgirls being
- 19:09injured and maimed and murdered left and
- 19:12right? Can we
- 19:14not get things under control to
- 19:17the point where every one of these flipping stories
- 19:20does not have some young schoolgirl
- 19:23being injured or murdered? I don't understand
- 19:25it.
- 19:31Like, at this point, you might have as
- 19:34good a chance at survival being a
- 19:37schoolgirl in a japanese folk story as
- 19:39you do being a person of color in any
- 19:42zombie movie. But in
- 19:45the case of Kashima Riku, the girl
- 19:48didn't die in the bathroom.
- 19:51Naverily, she died
- 19:54at a local train depot when she
- 19:57was, we'll say, fell. But
- 20:00does anybody ever really fall onto
- 20:03the tracks wherein she was
- 20:06cut in half by the train?
- 20:09The train sliced this girl in half,
- 20:12leaving them without legs and the spirit or
- 20:14ghost or yokai or. I've honestly lost the
- 20:17threat of what we're even calling these, I guess
- 20:20demons at this point. Thus survives
- 20:23moving about by dragging the back part of
- 20:26their body a bloody
- 20:28half stump
- 20:31while scratching at the ground making a
- 20:34sound. M
- 20:36consequently, depending who you
- 20:39ask, they call this girl
- 20:41nightmare fueled thing,
- 20:45the tiki tiki, based on the
- 20:47sound that it makes as it pulls itself around.
- 20:51Legend has it she wants
- 20:54revenge, and if she finds
- 20:57you, she will chase you which
- 21:00I imagine she isn't great at doing since she's dragging her
- 21:02bloody torso stump around. But what do I know?
- 21:06And you might hear that and you might say, well, okay, but,
- 21:09Hunter, this is a
- 21:12podcast about bathrooms. We don't just talk
- 21:15about every random japanese toilet schoolgirl
- 21:17demon that you come across on the
- 21:20Internet. Like, if they're not in the bathroom, what in the heck are we
- 21:23even talking about them for? Well,
- 21:27the legend goes
- 21:29that Kashima Riku inhabits
- 21:32bathroom stalls and asks occupants
- 21:35through the stall divider while they're pooping,
- 21:39do you know where my legs are?
- 21:43That's a spooky one. Imagine
- 21:45you've sat down. You've begun
- 21:48the process of what I like to call taking a fat
- 21:51crap. And you know how you can kind
- 21:54of look under the stall and tell there isn't anyone
- 21:57dwelling there? Well, you do that. You look under
- 21:59the stall, no feet. You're all alone in the bathroom,
- 22:02all clear in your brain. You release the
- 22:05pile that you've been storing.
- 22:08You release the sphinx, which is short for
- 22:11beginning pooping, and you hear, do you know where my
- 22:13legs are? No,
- 22:16thanks. A, uh, thousand times no, thanks. Like, if
- 22:19she doesn't like your answer, she cuts your legs off.
- 22:24But legend has it, if you tell her that her
- 22:27legs are on the maishin expressway
- 22:30or by calling her the masked death
- 22:33demon, she won't slice and dice you. How gracious.
- 22:37But still,
- 22:41we continue as Japan
- 22:44provides us yet another fun
- 22:47bathroom demon, the akamanto.
- 22:51How much before we begin,
- 22:55how much do you want to bet? How
- 22:58much you want to bet the akamanto has something to do
- 23:01with the disembodied soul of some girl
- 23:07I have to read. So
- 23:10the Akamanto translates red
- 23:12cape, often because they are depicted
- 23:15as wearing a red cape or cloak. It's
- 23:18an old urban legends schoolyard
- 23:21tale that dates back to the 1930s.
- 23:25The Akamanto has also been called the akai
- 23:27kami, or aokami, which means red paper,
- 23:30blue paper.
- 23:33This toilet demon
- 23:35appears to a person in a public or
- 23:38school bathroom. Here we are again, back at the
- 23:41japanese school. Just don't go to school in Japan.
- 23:44That's what I've learned. Just don't do it.
- 23:48And it appears to people and asks them
- 23:51questions such as, do you want red paper or blue
- 23:54paper to wipe your butt with?
- 23:57And here's the fun part. And by
- 24:00fun, I mean awful. Either
- 24:03choice results in you getting killed.
- 24:05Like, the only way to not get killed is to
- 24:08ignore them and run away assumedly with your pants
- 24:11practically on the floor. The akamanto is said
- 24:14to haunt public and school bathrooms.
- 24:17Again, particularly likes the girls bathroom.
- 24:20Now, I don't like this one as
- 24:22much because it is said to be
- 24:25a male figure, and I don't like that he likes
- 24:28the girl's bathroom. I think that's icky.
- 24:31Um, and he is usually said
- 24:34to haunt the last stall in the line.
- 24:37Now, some less murdery
- 24:39versions say that he gives you a
- 24:42choice between red paper and white paper.
- 24:45And depending on your choice, you get either a
- 24:48kiss on your dairy air or
- 24:50a swat on the backside. Very bad.
- 24:55Presumably he's coming from the toilet bowl. It's just
- 24:57flipping creepy.
- 25:02I'm going to go out on a limb.
- 25:05I would rather be chased by the weird
- 25:07torso stump girl than
- 25:10have this toilet dwelling
- 25:13dude.
- 25:16Just. No, this
- 25:19is bad. Uh, it is
- 25:21usually said to appear. The akamanto is
- 25:24usually said to appear when you are caught without toilet
- 25:27paper in the stall. And if you try to bring your own to
- 25:30troubleshoot this problem, it'll just make it disappear. It's
- 25:33so unfortunate. And then it appears to you, red paper
- 25:36or blue paper.
- 25:41Next up in our tour of
- 25:44japanese toilet demons is a thing called
- 25:47the akonami.
- 25:49Now, the akonami is, um, a little
- 25:52bit different. Um, in
- 25:54short, this is yet another
- 25:57japanese yokai. And
- 25:59aka is a term that refers
- 26:02to dead skin cells. Cells or
- 26:05things that have been shed from the human body, such as
- 26:08hair, toenails, the likes.
- 26:12The full name of
- 26:15this yokai japanese toilet demon,
- 26:18akanami, means scum liquor
- 26:20or filth liquor, you lint
- 26:23liquor. Uh, but it first
- 26:26appeared in the 1770s, and the story
- 26:28began as an extension of buddhist cleanliness
- 26:31rituals. This
- 26:34yokai japanese toilet
- 26:36demon thing is really like a
- 26:39bathtub demon. And essentially he goes about
- 26:42eating the filth at the bottom of the
- 26:45tub just so
- 26:47bad. I,
- 26:50you know,
- 26:55dang it. Could you imagine
- 26:58you walk into your bathroom and you pull the curtain back
- 27:01and you just have this weird little creepy
- 27:04looking imp thing, and he's just
- 27:07in the bottom of your bathtub, just up
- 27:10all of the yuck in the bottom of you.
- 27:14Uh, just like, chill out, bud. Like, take a
- 27:16lap. And
- 27:19he's said to eat it again, filth
- 27:22liquor. Um, my question
- 27:24is, why can't my bloke just get in there with some
- 27:27scrubby bubbles or some Mr. Clean
- 27:30magic spray? Why has he got a lick
- 27:33it? Like, this is a
- 27:35sick dude. He's just
- 27:38all up on the bathtub floor. There's flipping,
- 27:41like, toenails and beard hair.
- 27:45Stop it, you sick
- 27:47freak.
- 27:51But this guy is like that weird fish at the
- 27:54bottom of your aquarium who
- 27:57cleans the bad boy. But this one's like licking up
- 28:00bathroom grime.
- 28:04And as far as japanese toilet demons
- 28:06go,
- 28:09it's not an exhaustive list, because as I
- 28:12said, there's really
- 28:14infinite as many yokai as someone can come up with a
- 28:17need to explain something weird.
- 28:21But these are like, I would say, the top
- 28:23four japanese toilet demons. But before
- 28:26we go, as this search went
- 28:29on, I stumbled across
- 28:32what is called a game, the
- 28:34Daruma san. And this
- 28:37is one of those spooky things that is more
- 28:40spookier to read about than probably actually go
- 28:43do. I don't know. I didn't go do it. You know
- 28:45what? Maybe that's. Maybe that's bonus. I don't know.
- 28:48We'll see.
- 28:51But to play Daruma san,
- 28:54there are steps number one. Before you go to
- 28:57bed, you take off all your clothes. You just strip down to the
- 29:00buff, like total buff
- 29:02up. And then you go in the
- 29:05bathroom, and you fill your bathtub, and you turn off all lights. Now,
- 29:08here's the thing. I don't
- 29:10like baths, so, like, they've already lost
- 29:13me. I'm a big fan of the dark shower. I've shared
- 29:16that multiple times. Hard fan of the dark
- 29:18shower. But dark bath, I
- 29:21think it loses some of its
- 29:24pizzazz. But
- 29:27while in the dark, you sit in the,
- 29:29quote, middle of the bathtub. Now,
- 29:32my fat deaf isn't going to fit in the middle of
- 29:35the bathtub. I think this is made for a skinny
- 29:38japanese person. Um,
- 29:41but you sit in the middle of the bathtub, quote,
- 29:43facing the faucet, or tap, at
- 29:46which point you close your eyes and you wash
- 29:49your hair. Weird. As you
- 29:52wash your hair, you repeat the words, daruma san
- 29:55fell down. Daruma san fell down.
- 29:59You do not stop repeating these words until you
- 30:01finish washing your hair. Your eyes
- 30:04must remain shut this whole time.
- 30:09As you wash your hair, you will picture a japanese
- 30:11woman standing in the bathtub, presumably
- 30:14Daruma san herself, and she will slip and
- 30:17fall onto a rusty tap, gouging her
- 30:20eye out and thus killing her rough.
- 30:24After this vision, you will hear a sound coming from behind
- 30:27you, or feel a movement in the bath. Do not
- 30:29turn around or pee. Why did I get
- 30:32goosebumps? I don't believe any of
- 30:35this crap. I don't believe in this
- 30:37nonsense. So, like, why did I get goosebumps? Just
- 30:40now? You have
- 30:43summoned the ghost. You feel her
- 30:46presence as she emerges from the bathtub.
- 30:48Ask out loud, why did you fall in the
- 30:51bathtub? You can finally
- 30:54get out of the bathtub. Make sure your eyes remain
- 30:57shut. Make sure not to slip or trip
- 31:00as you get out of the bath. Do not drain the
- 31:02water until the next morning.
- 31:05Shut the door behind you. It is now safe to open your
- 31:08eyes. Keep the water in the bathtub. Do
- 31:11not let it go out, and do not
- 31:14turn on any lights. Go to bed
- 31:18now. The woman, quote unquote
- 31:21woman who appears to you or is said to
- 31:24appear to you because again, this is
- 31:27Halloween or nonsense, is a
- 31:30ghostly figure and she will follow you
- 31:32all day. She wears
- 31:35tattered and stained white clothes with black hair.
- 31:39She has but one eye. Her left eye is
- 31:41wide open and bloodshot. Her right
- 31:44eye is missing, leaving a bloody hollow eye
- 31:47socket, presumably from when she fell and
- 31:50impaled herself on the faucet earlier.
- 31:53Now the
- 31:55game. Now you have begun the game
- 31:58that is the beginning of playing Daruma san, or whatever
- 32:01this thing is called. When you wake up, the game
- 32:04begins and your day will begin as normal until you feel
- 32:07the presence of the one eyed woman glancing over
- 32:10your right shoulder. When you turn around, she
- 32:13will not be there. She will get
- 32:16closer and closer and closer
- 32:19as your day goes on, but do not let her catch
- 32:22you. If the one eyed woman is
- 32:24getting too close, you should shout tamare, which means
- 32:27stop. Then run away fast.
- 32:30This will put distance between you and the woman.
- 32:33You must end this game before midnight, or
- 32:36else she will keep stalking you and appear to you in your
- 32:38dreams to kill you.
- 32:42Fake. To end the game, you must
- 32:45catch a glimpse of the one eyed woman and shout,
- 32:48kata, which means I cut you loose
- 32:50while swinging your arm in a chopping motion.
- 32:53Think a, uh, karate swipe.
- 32:56The game will end and the one eyed women will
- 32:59follow you no more.
- 33:03Again. To reiterate, rules include
- 33:06do not open your eyes when the ghost first appears. Do not let
- 33:09the one eyed woman trip you when you leave the bathtub. In
- 33:12other words, don't completely beef it
- 33:14on the wet bathtub floor with your eyes closed in the
- 33:17dark. By the way, like the game's. I feel like the
- 33:20game itself. I think I know. I think I
- 33:23know how Daruma san ended up with one
- 33:26eye. She was trying to Daruma san
- 33:28herself and she yoinked it
- 33:31and planted her flipping face right into the
- 33:34faucet. Do not reenter
- 33:37the bathroom after you leave. Do not drain the bath until the morning, and
- 33:40do not let the one eyed woman catch you.
- 33:43Now, the website that I got this interesting
- 33:46information from, it says this game is very
- 33:48dangerous. It can get you killed when you're
- 33:51getting out of the bathtub. And it's important to play with
- 33:54caution. Now,
- 33:57I'm going to go ahead and tell you that the
- 34:00risk you run of completing schmacking
- 34:03your head on the bathroom floor by
- 34:05trying all of these maneuvers with your eyes closed,
- 34:08wet, slippery in the dark
- 34:11is a thousand times more
- 34:13dangerous than the actual notion that
- 34:16this air quotes demon spirit
- 34:19is going to catch you.
- 34:23Do this if you want, but
- 34:26just be careful. Don't smack your head. Figure
- 34:29out how to do this and not smack your head.
- 34:32The Japanese have all sorts of
- 34:35spooky things to have shared with us
- 34:37around the bathroom. They made
- 34:40a game, for goodness sakes.
- 34:43And as we close out this spoop gee season,
- 34:47I hope we didn't spoop gear.
- 34:50I don't know how to make that tense, um,
- 34:52but I hope it wasn't too
- 34:55dissettling. But this brings
- 34:57us to the end of Spoopki season and the
- 35:00end of another episode of Privy. Thank you all
- 35:03so much for joining us. We love that you're here. We thank you
- 35:06for being here. Um, your
- 35:09feedback is crucial. Your, uh, sharing
- 35:12of the show is crucial. As we move into
- 35:142024, I want to leave you all with kind of a
- 35:16holiday challenge. If you listen to privy,
- 35:20one of the biggest things you can do to support this show
- 35:23is share it. And we have a
- 35:25website,
- 35:26privycast.com. If
- 35:29you would share the link to
- 35:32Privycast. It's in the thing, uh,
- 35:35below. Share that on social media
- 35:38with your friends. And
- 35:41as we move into 2024, we're going to try to
- 35:44grow this thing. We're going to try
- 35:47to spread some bathroom knowledge.
- 35:51Stay away from the japanese weirdos. Uh, leave
- 35:53us a comment.
- 35:55Privycast@gmail.com. You can find those
- 35:58links at our website.
- 36:01Leave us a rating or review. The five star options are preferred.
- 36:04You can leave us a rating review on Spotify or Apple
- 36:07podcasts. Um, and for every rating you leave,
- 36:10we'll donate some money to the wounded warriors program,
- 36:12reminding you to keep pooping in the free world. But
- 36:15that free world has not always been free.
- 36:18Uh, it allows us to give a little bit back
- 36:21to those who have given so much for us.
- 36:23Um,
- 36:26as always, we want to thank Kevin McLeod and
- 36:28Pottington Bear for the use of their music this week.
- 36:31Thanks, Kevin and Pottington. We also want to
- 36:34thank the Creative Commons licenses for the
- 36:37spoop gee season sound
- 36:39effects. This has been another episode of
- 36:42Privy. Thank you so much for listening. Thank
- 36:45you all. I hope you've enjoyed your spoop key
- 36:47season. Own your stank.
- 36:51Push past your clogs. Keep pooping in the
- 36:54free world. And now, as always,
- 36:58don't forget to flush.