Latest / High n' Dry Podcast / Episode 15. A Dying Spouse & Darth Vader vs. Batman (Feat. Shara Crosslin) (Run Part I)

Transcript

Episode 15. A Dying Spouse & Darth Vader vs. Batman (Feat. Shara Crosslin) (Run Part I) · High n' Dry Podcast

• 0:16
  SPEAKER_01: But we'd also don't specify the time.
• 0:20
  SPEAKER_03: This could have been done at any time.
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's noon on a work day.
• 0:24
  SPEAKER_07: All right.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_03: Welcome to High and Dry.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_03: I'm Ryan Barron North, Resident Drunken Philosopher.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_03: With me as always, James Croslin, Resident High Philosopher.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_03: James, how's it going?
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_03: It's going pretty good.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_03: How are you this week?
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_02: I'm doing all right.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_03: Today joining us today, joining with us guest High Philosopher.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_03: We have web developer for Cross Coders LV.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_03: Sher Croslin, how are you doing today?
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_01: I am great.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for coming back.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: I'm excited for a second chance to uh talk about a bunch of silly nonsense.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: Had a great time last time.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_03: You're ready for your second chance to peer into the witch's asshole.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: You know it.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_01: Always.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: Was I supposed to wait until this one to do it again?
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, geez.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_04: I basically live in the witch's asshole now.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_01: It's the only place I know I won't die.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_03: Well, for our new listeners, high and dry starts with a thought-provoking question and ends in a fight.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_03: Before we get into any of that kind of thing, first we gotta get drunk and high.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_03: So uh uh James, what are you gonna be smoking today?
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_04: So uh today Sharon and I are both gonna be smoking a string called Skywalker.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_04: So uh this is in honor of our our big fight today between Darth Vader and good old boy.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_02: Wait, who is he fighting?
• 1:38
  unknown: Batman.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_03: Batman, that's right.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_03: Batman.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_03: He's always been, you know, in the comics, described as a good old boy.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_04: Batman, I do have to say though, probably very conservative.
• 1:52
  SPEAKER_01: Oh yeah.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_04: Well he's a billionaire.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_04: That's true.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_04: That's true.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_03: We'll we'll talk about it later.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, well, we'll get into it.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_03: We'll get into it.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so uh so you're both smoking the same thing, so that uh takes care of that thing.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_03: Today I'll be diving back into that primrose gin.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_03: It's developed a nice icy sheen from sitting in my freezer.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_03: Oh yeah, yeah, no, and I've uh I've learned a lot about gin and how it reacts with me.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_03: It's uh it's something special.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_03: It was enjoyable last time.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_03: It was, it was.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_03: It was almost uh it's like a super drunk.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_03: But you know, I've I've been getting into a more of a you know, I've reached that point now with my weekly binge drinking where uh I'm diving into the the nor ability of drinking where I just you know take it down like water.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_03: You're gonna be a hard-boiled detective.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you know, so I could sit there and ponder the murder of my girlfriend and the incoming bills.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_04: Not that you murdered your girlfriend, that someone murdered your girlfriend.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_03: Well, you know, there's that sort of thing.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_03: Romantics.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_03: She came in with legs down from her shoulders.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_03: Weird.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, it was very bizarre.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_05: Weird lady.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, hey, don't body shame.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's not what this podcast is about, I think.
• 3:06
  SPEAKER_04: Not what we've ever been about.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_04: So that weird lady.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_04: This woman had legs coming out of her shoulders.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_03: Beautiful.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_03: So beautiful.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_03: Just for days.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I guess it's time for that first shot um for this first one.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_03: This one's to Shara and uh to Carl Urban.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_03: So cheers.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_01: It's Carl Urban listening.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_04: Carl Urban is our number one listener.
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_01: He's always listening.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_04: It's Ed and Carl Urban.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_04: Sometimes they listen together.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_04: Uh yeah.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_04: Love that Skywalker.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_04: What would you say it tastes like?
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_04: It tastes kind of like um sweet.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's got like a flowery taste, but it also has like a little sweet tone to it.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it's like it's very fragrant.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_04: It's really nice.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_03: Well, sadly, I uh no idea what the hell you guys are talking about.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_02: Your booze is sad.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_02: You're drunk.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_04: Round two.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_04: I think round two should go to all fathers and father figures who've fallen into lava and had their limbs burned off or been shot in an alleyway.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_03: I agree.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_03: I agree.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_03: Here's to those guys.
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_04: I think we can all relate to having an extremely powerful dad that that disappeared at crucial moments in our lives and whatnot.
• 4:28
  unknown: Yeah.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_03: Or just uh well that's the uh that's the millennial curse right there.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, that was two, right?
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, that was two.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_03: Time for round three.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_03: What's this one too?
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um I saw we had uh we're getting a lot, we're still getting those listeners trickling in from San Jose.
• 4:44
  unknown: Yeah.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_03: And then I also saw Oklahoma starting to start to join in the party.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_04: Great! To the to the state of Oklahoma.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_04: Wait, I think we mentioned it last time too.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_04: You know, we yeah, way to go on uh on that huge shift in landownership.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_04: Very interesting.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_04: I have I still have to read up more on it, but I'm super interested in it.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_04: Super cool.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_04: Sure, it's Oklahoma.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_01: Cheers.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_04: Oh I didn't get a lot out of that last one.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_04: This cartridge is clogging up a little bit, so I think I'm gonna take a little extra.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_02: That one's done, yeah.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_04: And it's so it's such a delightful flavor, too.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_04: Of course, you know, all smoke is kind of like irritating to the lungs, but this vapor, like this is some good tasting good vapor.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_04: Good tasting vapor.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_04: If I if I was gonna have something vaporized and then shoved into my breathing areas, I would choose this.
• 5:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, I'm uh I'm still okay.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_03: Stuck with alcohol.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_04: We can vaporize it and shove it into your breathing areas.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_04: That'd be interesting.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_04: Alcohol?
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I don't know.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_04: We maybe we could heat it, heat it to a vapor, and then you could inhale it.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_03: Or uh what was it, uh parks and recreation?
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_03: Or they take a Polaroid picture of you and it's like a shadow whiskey.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, but I like it.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so I say today let's jump right into it, huh?
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so before we uh talk about Darth Vader and Batman getting it on, we're gonna jump into our moral question.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_03: And this one's called The Expensive Treatment.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_03: Um, it's a now anyone every once in a while we'll get a listener who pops up in the UK.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_03: You guys will have no idea what the hell we're talking about here.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_03: Um but this podcast is shot in the United States.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_03: Uh a hellscape of healthcare.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_03: It's a third-world country with great PR.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but so in the extensive treatment, your partner is dying from a rare disease.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_03: Um luckily, they came up with a cure.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_03: It's been invented by one druggist, and it just turns out when you Google him, he lives right down the road.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_03: Awesome.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_03: He's selling the cure for ten times the amount it costs to make it, which is unrealistic.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_03: So he's selling the cure for like 125 times the cost to make it.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_05: That's the reality.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_03: And the ambulance ride over there alone is just gonna bankrupt you.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_03: But uh so you and you're trying to raise money, but even borrowing from friends, taking loans from banks, getting your um your GoFundMe set up, American health insurance and whatnot, you could only raise half the amount.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_03: You go to the druggist and offer to pay him half now and half later, but he refuses, saying that he invented the cure and is determined to make the money off of it.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_03: You beg him to sell it cheaper, as your partner isn't gonna make it until then.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um he's like, nah.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_03: So you believe you could break into his store one night after he goes home and steal the cur cure.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_03: This would definitely save your partner, although you might be arrested for the crime.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_03: What should I do?
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_04: What do you think, Sarah?
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_04: Guess first.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_01: So if it is uh definitely gonna save my partner, um I would pay the price of of uh going to prison, I think.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: Who would who would be like, no, I'm cool?
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like the stakes are are I feel low compared to the payoff.
• 8:11
  SPEAKER_01: I and I I guess people would disagree with me, which is why we're having this conversation.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: But it seems pretty that seems like a pretty obvious first take.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_03: I think so too.
• 8:21
  SPEAKER_03: Well, James, what are your initial thoughts?
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I agree.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_03: You know, uh it's it it's so and this has nothing to do with the two of you looking into your spouse's eyes.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_04: You're right, fucker.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not gonna get arrested.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_01: Actually, could James could you just leave the room for a couple minutes?
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_04: Listen, listen, my priorities are country first, then my wife.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_04: And if I'm disobeying the laws of my country.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_04: Never.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_04: But but I mean, I don't know.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_04: I think Cher nailed it.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_04: Why I guess there are people out there who would say something else, but those people, I don't know what's going on in their head where they're like, I really need to obey the law above all things.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_01: Um, or is is it the question asking like like you'd still have to have the proficiency to pull it off?
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like, is it guaranteed that you'd be able to succeed, or would you risk it without you know getting the thing, you know, because you're real shit at stealth?
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, like all yeah, yeah, if you have a low stealth score.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I mean, like all crimes, there's the chance that something goes wrong.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_04: I also don't know how to administer it.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_04: I think I'd take the the person who created it hostage.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_04: Okay.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, so you're gonna ramp up that prison time.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_01: Nice.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_03: Um, no, then there's an interesting take.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, yeah, my original thought was like, all right, so I'm gonna well, obviously, I'm gonna go rob the place to get this.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um my only question is do I leave the creator alive?
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_04: You have to, yes.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_04: You leave the creator alive so that people can still get the medicine.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_03: Then that's what I thought.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_03: Like, well, no, we still need him.
• 9:53
  SPEAKER_03: So I mean, what are the other options there?
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that does change the dynamic quite a bit, right?
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_01: If you had no way of knowing how to administer it or successfully administering it without that person who is very reluctant.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_01: Try and ask PharmaBro to help create your dying spouse.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, for money.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_03: And and that's kind of a I don't know, it's a troubling thought that that they so unanimously were like, yeah, we're gonna break in and take this cure, we're gonna save our spouse.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_03: Yet we're still live, like we the why is this system the system?
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_04: Uh well because the life or death consequences are like slow.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_04: It's like a steamroller that's rolling to us instead of a bullet, you know?
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_04: Um when you're when you when you're told your spouse is gonna die, it's more like a bullet.
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_04: It's eminent.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_04: Um, but for a lot of us, that steamroller seems really far off, even though we're just because we're walking slowly in front of it.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_04: We're walking slowly in front of it, and we're like, ah, we're beating the steamroller, but it's catching up to us.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_03: Well, well, are are you guys familiar with uh Dr.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_03: Jonas Salk, the creator of the polio vaccine?
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: Hero.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_03: And he was an absolute hero, and why we don't have statues of him everywhere is fucking beyond me.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_03: Well, and I'm British.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_03: We're not allowed to like British people.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_03: Well, well, I think what it is, the reason why we don't have statues of him anywhere is because when he created the polio vaccine, he fucking patented it for all of us.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_03: With his statement being that like you can't patent the sun.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_04: Was he British?
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_04: I actually don't know.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe I'm thinking of someone else.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_03: He was he was American.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: He was American.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_03: He was American.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_03: Maybe I was thinking of someone else.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_03: But I th that's why I think that we don't have the statues of him, is because we he is American.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_03: But if too many people hear the story about how he just gave us the cure for polio, yeah, we'd start asking, well, why don't we have the other ones too?
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_01: Well, we definitely we don't appreciate science in this country, first off, you know.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_04: Science is for nerds.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_04: Getting things done is for jocks.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: You can't get things done without those scientists, you short-sighted dick.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_03: No, and it's working out, it's working out pretty much the same thing.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_03: We had this huge golden year where we had abs and shit, and we were able to take on everything around us, but now you know our dad's dealership is like gone out of business, and we hate our wives and spouses and such, and we haven't talked to our kids in forever, and just we're in a constant state of decline.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_03: That steamroller's catching up.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: We we can we can hear it now.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_01: We couldn't hear it before, but now we're like, what the fuck is that?
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_04: Sounds like there's a steamroller behind me.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_04: Not gonna look, but well, people we we I think we touched on this in our identity episode, where it's people who are overly concerned with identity rather than like real results.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_04: Uh it's those people who try to keep identity as a static thing rather than growing over time.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_03: No, definitely, definitely.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_03: And and I, you know, I've been thinking about it a lot lately.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_03: We're just in the middle of a pandemic.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_03: I'm thinking about health insurance, and uh pretty soon here I'm gonna have to come up with a new means of health insurance and such.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_03: And it's just uh like I still have a lot of hope inside me that uh you know, that third grader who's you know hearing about the Statue of Liberty for the first time and stuff like that, he's not a hundred percent dead yet.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_03: You know, he's still in there saying, no, this is this is America.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_03: Well, he was being lied to.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_03: And he's being lied to.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_03: And yes.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_04: You're you're third don't hold on to third grader self too much.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_04: Third grader self was an idiot who believed what was told him.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_03: Oh no, I kick I kick him to death every day.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_04: You should blame the people who ruined third grade you and and go kick them to death, but also you don't owe anything to third grade you other than to be to pursue truth, you know.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_03: Exactly, exactly.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and I mean that's like a duality of the internet.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, you have Facebook, which has led to I say, I suppose this rise of nationalism that we're seeing right now, but simultaneously it's made a lot of the other information readily available, and the people who don't hear it these days are the ones who are just refusing to hear it.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_04: Um they they have spaces just for them that they've shoved everything else out of, and that's why you've got that's why like all the old people are on Facebook, all the olds are are on Facebook all the time, and it's because it's a closed environment and they keep shoving like progress out.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_03: That's what olds do.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_03: Well now you have now you have Parlor, which is a Facebook just for conservative older people.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_03: It's like just for hyper racists.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_01: It's like look, we want to go to the Chamber of White Supremacy.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's it's bad.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_03: It's we just want to go to a place where there's no other opinion.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_03: And it's it's disturbing.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_03: It is disturbing.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_03: And at that, it's time to move on to the next part.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_03: Final thoughts, anybody?
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_03: Um so so final thoughts.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_03: Uh your neighbor is also a widely renowned um piece of shit.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_03: And druggist on the side.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_03: He's got the cure for your spouse's malady.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_03: You're gonna break into his house.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_03: Final thoughts, Cheryl.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, I think my my thoughts haven't changed at all.
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, it's a price I'm willing to pay.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_04: Fuck that guy.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_04: I'm getting I'm saving my wife.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_01: That more or less might have happened if uh my spouse was treated at a hospital anyway.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_03: So Yeah.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_03: That one's a pretty easy one.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_03: All across the board.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm not I'm not letting my spouse die for this guy's greed.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_04: Which do you care more about?
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, your spouse or private property rights.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_04: Which honestly, come on.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: Wait, how much private property do I have?
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: This is gonna directly impact my decision.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_04: You have so much private property.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm gonna take a look at his will real quick.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_03: Pull that out of the freezer real fast, see what he's looking like.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_03: Oh man.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um, all right.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_03: Well, with that being said, um, private property rights.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_03: Save your spouse.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_03: There it is.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_05: All right, obviously, private property rights.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_03: Moving on to the important questions, because the other question, which is too damn depressing.
• 16:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, we now jump into our versus match, where this week we have Darth Vader versus Batman.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_03: This one won't be depressing either, I'm sure.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there's no way this is.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_04: None of them have tragic origins to that robber did Batman a favor.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_03: All right, well, let's kill some younglings and knock this thing out.
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_03: So um on High and Dry, we have a patent method of discovering who's the winner between your favorite pop culture characters or breakfast cereal mascots, and it is completely undisputable.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_03: We start with three rounds.
• 16:55
  SPEAKER_03: Um, winner of the throwns, of course, that goes to it.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, round one is a fight club style thing where both characters jump in the ring, they have no items on them, they strip down and just beat the crap out of each other.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_03: Uh round two, we now zoom out to a city view where these two characters are past a manila envelope underneath their apartment door, and now know that inside this city they have to go fight the other one.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_03: They're allowed to use tactics and all the items that their budgets can afford.
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_04: These are some big budget franchises.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so it's just Disney versus inherited wealth.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_01: Um Disney versus maybe Disney also?
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's Fox Studios.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: Or WB.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_06: WB does DC.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, something like that.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, W Warner Brothers.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yep, yep, yep.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and then finally, round three is the same thing, except now they get to bring a friend.
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_03: So, and both of these characters aren't really big in the friend department.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_03: They have powerful sometimes friends.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, they have powerful sometimes friends.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_03: Well, let's jump on in.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_03: So, round one, these two characters have just jumped in the ring.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_03: Uh Brad Pitt is the shit.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_03: You you skipped our shot.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, it's the gin.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's what the people come for.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, the people, the people would not disrespect us if we did not take our fourth.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, well, let me go ahead and pour this fourth shot of primrose gin into my measured shot glass.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_03: Way to go, Sarah, on on pointing it out.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, she's like, where the fuck's my fourth hit?
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_03: I came on this show for a reason.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_04: Uh well, what's it too?
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_04: Sherra, do you have a do you have anyone that you would like to toast?
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_04: Or any concept in general?
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_01: Any concept in general.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_03: How about Salk?
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, Jonas Salk, what a hero.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_03: Here's to Jonas Song.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_03: His name's Jonas.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_03: And he's a little drunk.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_01: That was a very large hit.
• 18:55
  SPEAKER_04: Oh my god.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_01: I feel things will get interesting in this fight between Batman and Darth Vader.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, is that his fighting?
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_04: I'm not good at remembering.
• 19:04
  SPEAKER_03: Um is that who we're talking?
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_03: Well, yeah, let's just jump back into the American healthcare system.
• 19:11
  unknown: Oh boy.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_03: I'm on, I'm in for a ride.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_03: All right, it's round one.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_03: Two characters jumped in.
• 19:16
  SPEAKER_03: Brad Pitt just explained the rules.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_03: Carl Urban is always looking on.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_01: Um Ed's next to him.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_03: Ed and Carl Urban.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_03: And the two of them start punching each other out.
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_03: Not Ed and Carl Urban, Darth Vader and Batman.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_03: Um, Sherra, first thoughts.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_01: Ooh, so first thoughts, I think the force is gonna be like really hard to beat.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's true.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_01: So I am thinking Darth Vader probably has an edge with that.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_01: But Batman has some wonderful trinkets, but he he can't get to those until next round anyway.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_03: Basically, all he's relying on is comic book ninja training.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_01: Does he get his suit in the first round?
• 20:05
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no suit.
• 20:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he was just instructed to remove his shirt, his shoes.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, he's got the gray pants on, but they took away his utility belt.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_01: You don't have Leotard's still intact.
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_04: That's you don't so that's a great point.
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_04: But I have a counterpoint.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_04: So far, we've said that people can't bring non-body items in.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_04: I just want to point out, Darth Vader has cybernetic limbs.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_04: So so he's just he's gonna have a hard time.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_04: He's gonna have a hard time.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_03: So Darth Vader walks in and you got Carl Urban weapons, please, and he's waiting for you to hand over everything, and he starts like motioning to Vader's helmet, and Vader's like, I can't breathe without it.
• 20:48
  SPEAKER_03: Are they still gonna make him take it off?
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_04: Um I think so.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_04: I think he has to take it off, which means he'll have to beat Batman very quickly if he's if he takes the helmet off.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_04: He's gotta move it.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: Well, don't you make the rules if it's an accommodation for someone?
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, do you think that's well what would happen?
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_03: What would happen is um so Brad Pitt is having them remove all their stuff, and and Vader's getting ready to remove his helmet, which will then give him like a 60-second countdown to beat Batman.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_03: And Brad Pitt will look back into the box office where the high and dry podcast guys are seated, just kind of veiled by shadow, and he'll wait for us to lean forward into the light and either nod or disapprove.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_04: So, so does Darth Vader get his helmet?
• 21:38
  SPEAKER_04: We did not allow the Mandalorian to keep his helmet.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_04: But the the that doesn't keep him alive.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_03: It just So at that point we we leaned into the light for a moment, and then we give Brad Pitt the hold on a minute, and we go back into the shadows and we're talking to each other.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_04: Does he get to keep his helmet?
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_04: And he does does he get to keep his cybernetic limbs, or does he have to try to fight Batman without his limbs?
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_04: Well, do we have the tools to pull those off right now?
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_04: I mean In this world we have to count it.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_04: Well, we don't have to.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_04: We can decide.
• 22:05
  SPEAKER_04: Does he get his limbs?
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_04: Quick yes or no.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_01: No, uh so I think if it's required for him to continue living, like if it's a a tool.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: That enables him to survive, then that's different than just something that you know he can use without living or dying based on its proximity to himself.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_03: So like I mean, if one day we do a fight between Stephen Hawking and Carl Sagan, I'm not about to dump Steven out of his wheelchair.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_04: I would.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_04: If we're gonna make him fight, he can't have his wheelchair.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_04: And we just watch Carl Sagan kick him to death.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's exactly right.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_03: Dude, and that's when we lean forward in the shadows and like, dude, this is some sick kick.
• 22:50
  SPEAKER_03: Okay, okay.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_04: He gets his limbs, I guess.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so he gets his limbs, he gets his helmet, it keeps him alive.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_01: But would he necessarily need his limbs to use the forces?
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_03: Well, here's what we're gonna do.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_03: Well, we we want to do it at their most powerful.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_03: Let's do it before he burns.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_03: So, yeah, and so according to the story and just the way his powers were building, physically, he was the most powerful right at the last few minutes of Hayden Christensen.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_04: Um, yeah, but also he wasn't Darth Vader then.
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_04: That's oh wait, no, no, was he Darth Vader?
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_04: No, he crowned him Darth Vader after he burned.
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_04: After he burned.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_04: So he's not Darth Vader when he's Anakin Skywalker.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_04: Um I don't know.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_04: I think he doesn't get his limbs, and I think he has to kind of try to fight Batman with a helmet, with the force, but with no limbs.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, he gets to keep the yeah, he gets to keep the helmet.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_03: Well, no, so we did allow Rick Sanchez to hold on to some of the ones that he had built into himself.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_03: Internal.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_03: But I mean, if it's the entire fucking arm, it's internal as it gets.
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_01: So I think again, in that kind of situation, I think he could still use the force um without needing limbs.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_01: It's contactless.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_01: I understand that he makes the gesture, but like Well, we'll say to Darth, like, all right, man.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_03: You get legs, not arms.
• 24:13
  SPEAKER_03: You get the legs, take off the arms.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you don't you don't get the arms, you get the legs.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_03: Isn't that fair?
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_03: And you're lucky.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_03: And you're lucky that we're letting you keep the helmet.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're this we're making a lot of concessions here.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we're making a lot of concessions.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm at that point, I'm gonna point over to Carl Irvin.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_03: Like, look, we got Judge Dredd, we got uh Billy the Butcher ready to beat your ass.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_03: The guy we got Doom.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, we got Doom.
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_03: Forgot that he beat the rock.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_01: We got the Kool-Aid Man, yeah.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_03: We got a lot of people here, so take them off.
• 24:42
  unknown: All right.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_04: So then it comes down to can an armless Darth Vader beat a gadgetless Batman.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I would say yes.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_03: And why?
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I I would just say because no, I changed my vote.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_01: Um Jin Piphany was.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I just had a gin a Primrose Piphany brought to you by Primrose Gin.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_03: Um remember, when you're dealing with all of life's issues, turn to Primrose.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um because I feel that uh Batman's theme of willpower and overcoming all would somehow allow him to crawl his way to Darth Vader and like flip the off switch or some shit.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_04: I think this one's really tough.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, it is a hard one.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_04: Uh I I think that it's required for uh for Darth Vader to use his hands for a lot of his force powers, especially ones where he deflects, but he but you're not really deflecting Batman.
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_04: I think that the one he has most access to is probably the one where he uh it influences people.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_04: And if he used that to get into Batman's head, that would be pretty powerful.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_04: The Jedi mind trick.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_01: If he couldn't um summon his powers, I'm talking about Darth Vader.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_01: If he couldn't summon his powers before Batman could run up to him and just start fucking wailing on him, Batman might actually have a chance.
• 26:20
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, Batman's a ninja.
• 26:21
  SPEAKER_01: Time is an important factor.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_03: And I would say that even in the Darkened Basement, I think the fact that it is a darkened basement will play to Batman's strengths.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 26:31
  SPEAKER_03: Um and I will also say, in a counter to your point about Darth Vader getting into Batman's head, um, Batman through the comic book history has shown that you don't mess with Batman's head.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_03: Which is bizarre thematically because his entire backstory is around him being messed up in the head.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_03: Just needing a therapist.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_03: Um which which thank God, because if it if if he actually found a therapist, he would just turn into a terrible billionaire.
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_04: He might he might have given some of his money to charity and like uh increased the the livability of his community to stop all this crime from developing instead of going out and beating the shit out of them.
• 27:10
  SPEAKER_01: He could be spending that money on local resources where experts could figure the shit out instead of just suiting up and punching some hundred for more than penguin.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_03: Just beating someone who needs help themselves.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_03: This is how we all work out our rage.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_03: So I would say that Darth Vader would try and enter Bruce Wayne's mind, and Bruce Wayne would wield his parents' death as the weapon it's become.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_04: So so Darth Vader, so like Jedi mind tricks don't get into the other person's mind.
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_04: They just influence.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_03: Like I'm talking it's been shown many times throughout Star Wars canon that if you try it on like even when you tried it on fucking the the Bug Man who wanted to sell shit, it wasn't even about his parents' death.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_03: It was just about not getting cheated.
• 27:55
  SPEAKER_03: You think Batman is especially resistant to Batman would be like, yeah, man tricks don't work.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_04: And then he'd run up and pull Darth Vader's breathing tube out.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: Because meanwhile, he Anakin, who lives inside of Darth Vader, would have just heard his former owner, and that's sending him through a mental loop.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_03: There you go.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_04: I I agree.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_04: I think Batman, especially because Batman's like whole thing is planning.
• 28:20
  SPEAKER_04: I think he'd come in prepared for like Darth Vader.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_04: His whole thing is like being super prepared.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_03: Even if it was all just while he was walking down the aisle to the ring.
• 28:29
  SPEAKER_04: He'd be watching Darth Vader and analyzing him.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, while Darth Vader's just getting pissed off.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 28:35
  SPEAKER_03: Cher, final thoughts.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_03: Send your vote if you don't mind as well.
• 28:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think um I think Batman might actually have an edge on this one.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna switch to Batman.
• 28:44
  SPEAKER_03: All right, one on Batman.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_03: James?
• 28:46
  SPEAKER_03: Batman.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: Me?
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: Batman.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_04: Unanimous on Batman.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_04: Unanimous on Batman.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_04: If if Darth Vader got to keep his arms, it'd be a different story.
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_04: Let's talk about that right now.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_04: That's a problem with having your arms burned off, is that you don't have arms anymore.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_04: That's true.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_04: One of the many problems is that you don't have arms anymore.
• 29:03
  SPEAKER_01: Especially troublesome when you are facing somebody in hand-to-hand combat.
• 29:07
  SPEAKER_01: And they are very skilled at it.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_03: And they have arms.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah, that's a good point.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_03: So, round two, we now enter into the city view where these two characters have received a manila envelope.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_03: Um, Dry Faders received under his apartment door.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_07: If you wanted arms, you should have you shouldn't have had your arms burned off.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_03: And Brad Pitt looks up at us at the box office.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_03: You guys are fucked up.
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_03: Shut up.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_01: The skywalker's some good shit, man.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_03: If I wanted your opinion, Brad Pitt, I would beat it out of you.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_01: It does appear to be taking us to the dark side.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_03: So, round two, these characters now have a full city view.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_03: They know what's going on, they're ready to fight.
• 29:56
  SPEAKER_03: Cheryl, initial thoughts.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_01: Man, just Batman has so many gadgets.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just trying to think of how many, and it's all of like he has a whole Batcave full of them.
• 30:07
  SPEAKER_04: He does have a whole Batcave full of them.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: He he's so good at gadgets.
• 30:15
  SPEAKER_01: Gadgetry is really a Batman thing.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_04: And Darth Vader is a gadget.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_04: Darth Vader is a is part gadget.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_01: Objectifying Darth Vader.
• 30:25
  SPEAKER_04: It's part gadget.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe, you know, maybe he's like, oh, this motherfucker, I'm gonna reroute his circuitry.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_03: All night long.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna fuck Darth Vader.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_01: Pack my tiny screwdriver out to Alfred.
• 30:42
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going for the motherboard.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_04: I uh I think that I think that that's definitely one thing Batman could do.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_04: He's a smart guy.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_04: He would he would probably be like, I gotta find a way.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_04: I could I could fuck with the circuitry, I could do tons of things to him.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_03: But he's also he's gotta get up in there.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um and Batman, at the end of the day, is a ninja and would go for him.
• 31:06
  SPEAKER_03: You know, which is which is weird.
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know why Batman doesn't go for these guys more when they're in a weakened state.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_03: Like he's a ninja who shows up and he's like, Alright, now let's fight.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_03: He's also honorable.
• 31:15
  SPEAKER_04: He he that's why he's not at with the ninjas anymore.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_04: Um well he's cons he's sometimes honorable.
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_04: Well, so Darth Vader's got a lightsaber.
• 31:25
  SPEAKER_04: He does have a lightsaber, which is a big thing.
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, lightsaber's.
• 31:28
  SPEAKER_04: Oh wait, what's a lightsaber?
• 31:31
  SPEAKER_03: Darth Vader also has a Death Star and zero concern about what happens to this planet.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_04: Uh so does Death I mean, does Vader own the Death Star?
• 31:43
  SPEAKER_04: Can he operate the Death Star on his own?
• 31:45
  SPEAKER_04: Because right now he's on his own.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_03: He has the yeah, the ability to do so.
• 31:49
  unknown: Yeah.
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_03: Because he also acts as the face piece for Palpatine, and he's commanded the Dart.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_03: It was Darth Vader's call that destroyed Alderon.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so I want to say real quick though, that uh just because a planet gets blown up, especially Earth, does not mean that Batman is defeated.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_04: I I I gotta say that in a lot of stuff where there's some like world wiping out thing, Batman is there like a fucking cockroach.
• 32:19
  SPEAKER_04: Going going up to space to infiltrate the Death Star.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_04: He surfs in on a meteor from the remnants of Earth and then slams through the windshield.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_04: And then he sets some kind of bomb in the Death Star that turns back time to before Earth was exploded.
• 32:34
  SPEAKER_04: So I mean, I don't think that is that's not how Batman gets beat.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_04: Batman doesn't get beat by like world-shaking big events.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_04: He gets he gets beat one-on-one by someone who he failed to anticipate properly.
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_04: And I think that he's going to fail to anticipate uh Darth Vader's ability to pinpoint you in space and choke you from wherever.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_03: So then so do you think that it would just go down by so Darth Vader calls him on Skype?
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_06: Calls him up because Batman loves taking calls.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_06: Batman takes calls from the bad guys all the time.
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_03: And he chokes Alfred too while he's at it.
• 33:11
  SPEAKER_06: No witnesses.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_03: Huh.
• 33:15
  SPEAKER_03: So uh do you think it just Batman gets a phone call and Batman's like, oh, let's see who this is.
• 33:20
  SPEAKER_03: And then Dar there's like, well, done.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_03: I'm here to talk about your car's extended warranty.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_01: We've been trying to reach you.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_04: So so I know Batman's superpower is also to be well, he's like the the ultimate Boy Scout where he's like prepared for anything, but I don't know how you prepare for like uh getting choked from somewhere in space.
• 33:44
  SPEAKER_06: Yeah.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_06: We'll share our thoughts.
• 33:46
  SPEAKER_01: That's kind of my thought too.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_01: Now that Darth Vader has his full power reinstated, um, I I don't think that Batman can overcome that force regardless of how much money he throws at inventions.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_04: He might like if he had a friend nearby, like a psychic friend, like like maybe we get to the next round and that's what we come up with.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_04: But like he does not have a psychic friend to protect him from the force.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_03: We'll talk about that in just a second.
• 34:11
  SPEAKER_03: So um, Cheryl, starting with you, can I get your vote?
• 34:14
  SPEAKER_01: Uh I am gonna go for Darth Vader this round.
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_03: James?
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_03: I'm also gonna go Darth Vader.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_03: Damn it! And I'm gonna go Darth Vader as well.
• 34:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's just too it makes too much sense.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_03: It makes too much sense.
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_03: We well, this would be the start of like Flash's comic book, where he's gotta avenge the death of Batman from deadly ATT calls.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, like something they to that they totally couldn't anticipate.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 34:39
  SPEAKER_04: People, people in even superheroes couldn't anticipate someone who at some somewhere in space can just start choking you.
• 34:46
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_03: Well, well, well, that brings us into round three right now, where one for Batman, one for Darth Vader, and round three, they now get to bring a friend.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_03: And I'm gonna kick this one off, and I think that this is where Batman would retake it again because he views the people around him as tools, and he's gonna pick the best tool for the job.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_03: That is true.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_03: Whether it's some forensic nerd who can run so fast that he changes time, whether it's a Kansas City alien who is a god, he's gonna think like who should beat Darth and send him after him.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 35:23
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but that's my thoughts.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_03: Cheryl, your thoughts?
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_01: So I thought uh with Batman, you know, the Justice League, that's a pretty powerful pantheon to pull from.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_01: Uh like Superman's pretty much indestructible.
• 35:36
  SPEAKER_01: Um does Darth Theater have access to Kryptonite?
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_03: No.
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_03: Not once, not once in Star Wars canon.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_03: Is he this is my kryptonite?
• 35:46
  SPEAKER_01: I thought I saw a crossover episode, maybe not.
• 35:50
  SPEAKER_01: Uh yeah, so I think uh I think Superman would give Batman just a huge advantage.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_01: He's otherworldly power and speed and strength.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_03: Well, uh, I would say, you know, just I I think just throwing it out there, Batman's gonna bring Superman.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_03: Um, I mean they have their own comic book together when they're part of the Trinity together.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um and just when you think, you know, who's Batman teaming up with, it's gonna be Superman.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_03: So But wouldn't Superman as wouldn't he know.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_05: I I'm trying to make an argument for why he wouldn't attack Darth Vader, but I can't.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_05: Darth Vader's a real bad guy.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 36:25
  SPEAKER_03: No, so like the phone call comes on, and while Batman's getting choked out, like Darth Vader's got his lightsaber up against the back of an E-woke and activates it, and Superman just flies over there and beats Isaias.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_03: Um, you know, and standing next to him is Palpatine, who also gets his ass beat.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_03: It's Padme.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: Or Padme.
• 36:47
  SPEAKER_03: Superman's like, what?
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_06: You can't kill me.
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_06: My wife, I'm using my wife as a shield.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_06: Oh my god.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_06: That might actually be.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_03: Well, but at that point, Superman's like, you're going to jail.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I don't know how.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_04: Do you think Superman could be influenced by a Jedi mind trick?
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_04: I don't think so.
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_01: Who knows?
• 37:11
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe Batman says like some really xenophobic conment about extraterrestrials.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_01: And so he looks so Superman looks over at uh Darth Vader and is like, let's get this motherfucker.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, fuck these planet people.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_04: But we don't have a planet, right?
• 37:28
  SPEAKER_03: But well, I think that nothing's really gonna stop him because Darth Vader's pointing the Death Star down at Earth.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_03: That's where Lois lives.
• 37:36
  SPEAKER_03: Um that is um that's where his mom lives.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_03: Well and I mean I'm I'm just trying to think through who Darth Vader can bring, and I mean it's gonna either be Obi-Wan or Palpatine.
• 37:51
  SPEAKER_03: You know, and both neither of them can stand up to a raging Kryptonian.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_04: It's true.
• 37:58
  SPEAKER_04: That's true.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_04: I think that uh I think that uh Darth Vader would bring the entire Federation as his ally, and it still would make it.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_03: It still wouldn't stand up to the Kryptonian.
• 38:10
  SPEAKER_01: They can't even properly design a helmet for their stormtroopers.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, and I'm I'm but I I will say this because I I feel where this is going.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_03: I feel like we could take a vote right now.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_04: Well, that's because Superman won.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, because Superman wins.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_03: What's important to remember though is Darth Vader won round two.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_03: He did.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_03: Which is a very, you know, like dominating round over like who is who in terms of who could take who.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_04: And it and if he had his arms in round one, I feel confident he would have taken it.
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_04: But he shouldn't have had his fucking arms burned off if he wanted arms in that fight.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_04: Seriously.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_03: Well no, it's part of his story.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_03: It's an important part part to bring up that our stories and our backstories are you know our weaknesses in the present.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_04: So it's it really sucks that he didn't have arms.
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_04: That was a bad thing that happened to him that he had to overcome.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_01: I think it more sucks that Batman is uh good friends with Superman.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_01: I think that's Star Trek's real problem here.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, is the friends that Batman's bringing to the table.
• 39:11
  SPEAKER_01: Bruce deserves no glory for this.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I think what I'm trying to say.
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_03: He's like, yeah.
• 39:17
  SPEAKER_03: Batman won.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_04: But when you but when you threaten a planet, Superman has to get involved.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_04: He wouldn't get involved with like the Riddler.
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_04: But you know, that's Batman has to fight the Riddler alone.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_04: But Batman's gonna I mean Superman's gonna get involved when Darth Vader is threatening Earth.
• 39:35
  SPEAKER_03: Definitely.
• 39:36
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, I Batman doesn't deserve the glory, but I'm voting for Batman, Sarah.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_03: I mean Darth Vader.
• 39:43
  SPEAKER_03: I'm wait, who?
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_03: You want to say Superman.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_04: Superman wins.
• 39:46
  SPEAKER_03: I'm voting for Superman.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_01: Sarah?
• 39:49
  SPEAKER_01: Superman has got this one.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, Darth Vader doesn't have any as powerful friends.
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_04: Sometimes it comes down to that.
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, sometimes it does come down to the relationships that you make and friends make you strong.
• 40:01
  SPEAKER_03: Friends make you strong.
• 40:03
  SPEAKER_03: Well, cheers to that.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_03: Friends make you strong.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna have one little more, a little more touch of primrose.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_03: Here's to friendship.
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_03: Really suck on it.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_03: No, and I think that one of the bigger points here is hey, if you know, if you almost died next to a river of lava, or if your parents got killed back in the day, or if anything's going on, go see a therapist.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_03: Because you probably won't be in this situation at all.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_04: Definitely.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_04: Find someone you trust and is reasonable that you can talk to about your problems.
• 40:37
  SPEAKER_01: Because mental health is important.
• 40:38
  SPEAKER_04: It is.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_04: Especially in these trying times.
• 40:42
  SPEAKER_04: Huh.
• 40:44
  SPEAKER_03: Well, thanks for joining everybody.
• 40:47
  SPEAKER_04: We feel really sympathetic toward both Darth Vader and Batman who choose to express their their uh trauma in unproductive ways.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_03: In violence and vengeance.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_03: And well, so I was uh I was watching uh I would just like to throw this at you guys real quick while I have you here, and we're on four shots deep.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_03: Um five.
• 41:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, five.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_03: I I was watching a film, it's on Netflix right now.
• 41:12
  SPEAKER_03: It's called Run.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 41:14
  SPEAKER_03: Um, and it's about a uh a mother who's taking care of uh her daughter who when she was born had so many she was she was born early and she had uh you know diabetes, parallel paralysis, um high iron in her blood.
• 41:30
  SPEAKER_03: She just needed someone else to take care of her.
• 41:33
  SPEAKER_03: And the movie takes place when it's time for her to be looking into colleges, she's a bright young woman, everything like that.
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_03: And for those of you listening, if you haven't seen Run, I'm about to drop some spoilers.
• 41:43
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 41:45
  SPEAKER_03: So um it comes to that all of a sudden we start to discover that the mother has been poisoning her daughter.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_04: Oh.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_03: Because she wants someone to need her.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I did see the preview for this, and I thought it looked interesting.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_03: It's worth the watch.
• 42:01
  SPEAKER_03: Um, did you guys want me to continue?
• 42:03
  SPEAKER_03: I guess.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_03: You can continue.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_03: Well, so basically, wait, no, I want to watch it.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_04: I decided.
• 42:11
  SPEAKER_03: You convinced me to watch it.
• 42:12
  SPEAKER_03: All right, well, we'll discuss it on next week's episode.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_03: You can record.
• 42:21
  SPEAKER_03: Run.
• 42:22
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, we expect some money off of this.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_04: We're giving our listeners a reason to live.
• 42:27
  SPEAKER_04: Watch run on Netflix.
• 42:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, there it is, everybody.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_03: Watch Run on Netflix.
• 42:33
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you for joining us.
• 42:35
  SPEAKER_02: This has been I can't believe that's how we're ending it.
• 42:40
  SPEAKER_03: This has been High and Dry Podcast.
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_03: I'm your host, Ryan Barron North, Drunken Philosopher, with me.
• 42:45
  SPEAKER_03: We got James Crosslin, our high philosopher, Sherry Crosslin.
• 42:48
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you for joining us again.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
• 42:49
  SPEAKER_03: Always great to have you on.
• 42:51
  SPEAKER_04: You can find us, we have a new Twitter account.
• 42:53
  SPEAKER_04: It's High and Dry Pod, High and Dry Pod, and you'll see our nice little red logo there.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_04: Um, check us out there if you have any questions for us.
• 43:01
  SPEAKER_04: That's a great place to get in contact with us.
• 43:03
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, we have our Instagram, High and Dry Podcast, Hi the LetterN Dry Podcast.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, and you can find me uh Baron underscore North, uh, Ryan Barron North.com.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_03: We're all over the place.
• 43:14
  SPEAKER_03: Thanks for tuning in again.
• 43:15
  SPEAKER_03: You guys take it easy, and we'll see you next week when we discuss the exciting conclusions of Run on Netflix.
• 43:25
  SPEAKER_03: Bye now.