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Sweet Bobby - My Catfish Nightmare True Story · Murder Files Unsealed

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: All right, so today we're diving into a case of catfishing.
• 0:03
  But this one, this one's a doozy, like seriously messed up.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this one, this one really gets yet.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: It's not just like, oh I met someone online and
• 0:13
  they weren't who they said they were. This is next level.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, absolutely, like orders of magnitude beyond your average years.
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: We're talking years of deception and a web of lies
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  so thick you wouldn't believe it.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: And the crazy part is it's all documented, like meticulously documented,
• 0:29
  so it's not just you know, he said, she said.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Right from the victim's point of view, which is even
• 0:34
  more wild.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: Exactly exactly.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: So this is the story of kirat Assi. She's a
• 0:39
  radio presenter right from London, Yeah, yes she is, and
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  she gets caught up in this unbelievable situation. I mean
• 0:46
  you might have even heard about this one. This was
• 0:47
  the whole Sweet Bobby podcast from Tortoise Media, right.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Right, and that Netflix documentary too, that was what.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: Just came out right yeah recently.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, crazy story.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, So Kira, she meets this guy online, seems like
• 0:59
  a total catch, right, successful doctor name of Bobby John dou.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: Of course, naturally. Yeah, isn't that how it always starts?
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  Speaker 1: Always a doctor, right, So they're chatting, they're hitting it off,
• 1:10
  she's developing feelings. But here's the kicker, Bobby JANDU doesn't exist.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and it gets worse. Yeah, way worse.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, it's so much worse because the puppet master behind
• 1:24
  this whole charade someone Curt knew personally.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah. You know, when I first heard about this, I
• 1:32
  was just floored. Like I've heard of catfishing obviously, but
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  the lengths this went.
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  Speaker 1: To, right, Like, how do you even wrap your head
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  around that?
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  Speaker 2: Exactly? I mean you almost have to admire the well
• 1:43
  not admire, but the the sheer audacity of it, you know, commitment,
• 1:48
  the commitment. It's mind boss, it really is.
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  Speaker 1: And it makes you question, like, what's the motivation? Right,
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  Like why go to such extremes, especially since.
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: From what I understand, there wasn't even a financial motive.
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  It wasn't like Carritt was said this Bobby money or anything, which.
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: Is that's the thing. If it was just about money,
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  it'd be messed up, don't get me wrong, but at
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  least there'd be some kind of I don't know, logic
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  to it.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, some kind of like twisted internal logic.
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  Speaker 1: Right, but this this feels almost, i don't know the
• 2:15
  word vindictive, maybe like someone was enjoying her pain.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: There's definitely a psychological element here that's just unsettling.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, so brace yourself because here's the reveal. The mastermind
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  behind Bobby jen Do none other than Kurat's own cousin
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  Simmer and Bogel.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the gut punch. I mean, catfishing is one thing,
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  but to be betrayed by family, that's a whole other level.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Of messed up totally. And this wasn't just some quick
• 2:42
  little scheme either. This played out over years, years of
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  Kurat's life documented meticulously with this person she thought she
• 2:51
  could trust.
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  Speaker 2: And that's where the story takes a turn too, because
• 2:54
  that documentation that's what ultimately unravels the whole thing.
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Take something out of a movie, right right.
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  Speaker 2: This journalist Alexi Mostros from Tortoise Media, he's the one
• 3:03
  who broke the story and he said the level of
• 3:05
  detail Kiret had was astonishing.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Wow. So she really did keep.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: Everything, everything, every message, every interaction, and.
• 3:12
  Speaker 1: I'm guessing that was key for him for Mostress to
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  be able to really put the pieces together.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely, because it wasn't just her word against someone else's.
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  She had the receipts.
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  Speaker 1: Wow. And to think she was saving all of that,
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  probably thinking it was proof of this loving relationship, when
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  really it.
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  Speaker 2: Was evidence of her own manipulation. It's chilling when you
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  think about it. And you know what really gets me.
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  It's not just you know, making out this guy Bobby,
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  it's how Bogel used like real stuff to make it
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  all seem legit. Oh you mean, like how real events
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  you know, yeah, real people, even tragedies.
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  Speaker 1: Oh gosh, right to try and like what get sympathy
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  from Kurat or something exactly.
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  Speaker 2: It's just so messed up, Like imagine fabricating someone's death
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  just to.
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  Speaker 1: I know, to manipulate someone like that.
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  Speaker 2: It's just it's beyond cruel. Yeah, it shows how this
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  deception went. It wasn't enough to just you know, invent
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  a person online. It had to be this whole alternate reality.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: Right, with this whole backstory and friends and yeah, it's insane.
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  Speaker 2: And all the while Bogel's living your own life, yeah,
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  you know, going to work, seeing friends whatever. It's mind blowing,
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  it really is.
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  Speaker 1: And it went on for so long, Like, how do
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  you even keep that up?
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  Speaker 2: It takes some serious I don't know, commitment to the
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  con I guess, and a lot of planning.
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  Speaker 1: Clearly, definitely it makes you wonder about like the psychology
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  of it all, right, Like what makes someone do this?
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  Is it? Is it a power thing? You think?
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  Speaker 2: I wish I knew. I mean, there's gonna be something
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  deeper going on there, right, some kind of I don't know,
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  need for control maybe.
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  Speaker 1: Right right, because if it wasn't about money, then what
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  was it about?
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  Speaker 2: That's a million dollar question? Mostros is the journalist. He
• 4:52
  said he'd love to interview Bogle to like get inside
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  her head a bit better.
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  Speaker 1: If she said anything like at all?
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  Speaker 2: Not really, I mean, I get it, she's probably got
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  lawyer telling her to keep quiet, and you know, the
• 5:01
  public scrutiny can't be.
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  Speaker 1: Easy, no, for sure, but it would be fascinating, you know,
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  to hear her side of it, if there even.
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  Speaker 2: Is a side, right, Like what is the justification? I'm
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  not sure there is one.
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  Speaker 1: But still, Okay, So we've got this crazy story, right,
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  someone's real life is completely upended by this, this online persona.
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  But then there's the legal side of things, And that's
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  where it gets I think even more.
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  Speaker 2: Complicated, absolutely, because legally speaking, how do you even define
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  what happened here?
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  Speaker 1: Right, Like, it's obviously wrong what Bogel did, but to
• 5:36
  actually prove that in court.
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  Speaker 2: It's tricky because the law it often lags behind technology
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  right totally.
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  Speaker 1: And then there's the whole free speech thing which always
• 5:45
  seems to get messy online.
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  Speaker 2: Right Where do you draw the line between someone just
• 5:48
  like messing around online, maybe having a bit of fun,
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  and something that's actually like criminal. It's a tough one.
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  And then on top of everything else, when Curate does
• 5:56
  come forward, you know, tries to tell her story, warn other.
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  Speaker 1: People don't tell me she got like attacked online too
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  big time.
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  Speaker 2: People were brutal, victim blaming, calling your names, all of it.
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  Speaker 1: It's like she wasn't already through enough. That's just awful.
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  Speaker 2: It's a really unfortunate side effect of you know, the
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  Internet in general, I think people feel like they can
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  say anything, do anything without any real consequences.
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: And it's easy to forget that, like on the other
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  side of that screen there's a real person with real feelings.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: Exactly, and in this case, someone who had already been
• 6:26
  through a lot.
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  Speaker 1: It's like people couldn't grasp how someone could be fooled
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  for so long, so they went with the easier explanation, right,
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  like she should have known better, which is.
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: So unfair because it completely ignores the manipulation.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: At play exactly, And that's what makes cases like this
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  so important to talk about because it could be any
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  of us, you know.
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  Speaker 2: Oh absolutely, we all have those things, those vulnerabilities that
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  someone who's really good at manipulating could.
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  Speaker 1: Exploit, right, right, Like we all want to believe the
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  best in people, especially someone we think we have a
• 6:57
  connection with, and that's where it can get danger especially online.
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  Speaker 2: It's like the internet can be this amazing tool for
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  like connecting with people, learning new things, but there's also this.
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  Speaker 1: Dark side totally, and that's why we're doing this, right
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  to shut some light on that so people.
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  Speaker 2: Can be more aware exactly. Awareness is key, Like the
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  more we understand about how manipulation works, the less likely
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  we are to fall for it.
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  Speaker 1: It's like knowledge is power, right, or at least protection, exactly.
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  Speaker 2: We need to be having these conversations, you know, especially
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  with young people, teaching them about online safety, digital literacy
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  all that good stuff.
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  Speaker 1: So the Internet's not going anywhere, right, If anything, it's
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  just going to get more I don't know, immersive, more
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  realistic for sure.
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  Speaker 2: So we need to be prepared.
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  Speaker 1: Be smart, be cautious, but.
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  Speaker 2: Also don't let the fear of what could happen stop
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  you from, you know, experiencing all the good stuff online.
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  Speaker 1: Right, there's a balance. You got to be able to
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  enjoy it without you know, constantly looking over your shoulder exactly.
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  You know, it's funny you should say that, because one
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  thing that really struck me reading about all this was
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  how many people just didn't believe it, Like they couldn't
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  get their heads around how someone could be taken in
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  by this Bobby for so long.
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  Speaker 2: Oh totally. It's like our brains just go, Nope, not possible.
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  Speaker 1: I would have known exactly. But that's the thing about manipulation, right,
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  It works because it plays on those blind spots, those
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  things we want to believe one hundred percent.
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  Speaker 2: And in Kira's case, she wanted this connection, this idea
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  of Bobby, to.
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  Speaker 1: Be real, so she kind of got like sucked in
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  deeper and deeper, and those doubts, those red flags, they
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  just got explained away you know, totally.
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  Speaker 2: And that's why, you know, even though this whole thing
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  played out online, it's really about those emotional vulnerabilities that
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  we all have.
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  Speaker 1: That's so true. It's easy to get caught up in
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  the technical stuff, the fake profiles, the made up stories,
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  but at the heart of it, it's about emotions.
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  Speaker 2: Exactly, because when we're emotionally invested, we let our guard down.
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  We're more likely to ignore those little warning.
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  Speaker 1: Signs, you know, absolutely, And I think that's why this case,
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  even though like extreme in a lot of ways, it
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  resonated with so many people because we all have those
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  vulnerabilities for.
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  Speaker 2: Sure, and made people realize, hey, this could happen to anyone.
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  Speaker 1: And that's scary, but also I think important to acknowledge
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  because if we can admit that, then we can start
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  to protect ourselves better.
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  Speaker 2: And that's where, you know, those calls for greater accountability
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  come in, like how do we make it harder for
• 9:20
  these things to happen in the first place?
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: Right, right? Because yeah, it'd be great to punish the
• 9:25
  people who do this kind of stuff, but even better
• 9:27
  if we could prevent it, you know, totally.
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: And it's not like technology is the enemy here. I mean, yeah,
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  it makes it easier to create these fake personas, but
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  it also helped expose this.
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  Speaker 1: Whole thing, right, well, that's true. I mean think about it.
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  If Kurat hadn't been able to connect with the real
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  Bobby John dou through social.
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  Speaker 2: Media exactly, who knows how long this would have gone on.
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  Speaker 1: It's like a tool is a tool, right, it can
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  be used for good or bad.
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  Speaker 2: One hundred percent. It's up to us as a society
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  to figure out how to use it responsibly and to
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  educate people, especially younger generations, about the potential dangers like.
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  Speaker 1: Online safety should be just as important as you know,
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  teaching kids not to talk to strangers in real life exactly.
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: And maybe even a little healthy skepticism wouldn't hurt either,
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  not to the point of paranoia. But but like.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Trust your gut, you know, if something feels off, it
• 10:14
  probably is exactly. Well, this deep dive into Sweet Bobby
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  has been. It's been a lot eye opening, for sure,
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  but also kind of disturbing, you know.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure, it really makes you think.
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: It does for anyone listening who wants to like go
• 10:27
  even deeper into this, definitely check out the Sweet Bobby
• 10:30
  podcast by Tortoise Media or that Netflix documentary. They're both
• 10:36
  really well done and give.
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  Speaker 2: You a lot to think about absolutely and you know,
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  hopefully spark some conversations about online safety, digital ethics, all
• 10:44
  that good stuff.
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  Speaker 1: Couldn't have set it better myself. Until next time, everyone,
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  stay safe online and keep those BS detectors on high
• 10:50
  alert here and as always, thanks for diving in with us.