Latest / INSPIRE STORY / Smile Dog

Transcript

Smile Dog · INSPIRE STORY

• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Welcome back to Great cast.
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: We the okay, go ahead.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: We're reading uh some classics today, one being an all
• 0:27
  time with the Some would say maybe not the Babe
• 0:30
  Ruth of Cepastas.
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: One of the guys that like the Barry Bonds.
• 0:36
  Speaker 2: Who's one that got kicked out for like steroids?
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: Barry Bonds has been pretty heavy.
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: Jason the Jason Giambi, Sure Armstrong, the Mark McGuire, the
• 0:48
  sum of Lance Armstrong, the Lance.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Armstrong of baseball.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: He was the best. He was the best cyclist of
• 0:55
  all time.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: I just want to say that I think your little
• 0:57
  steroid didn't hurt anybody.
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: We're in Smile Dog, along with some other stuff maybe
• 1:02
  the Beatles and the clockwork Actor. I don't know, but
• 1:04
  we're definitely reading Smile Actually, what if you if you
• 1:10
  think that small dog would have a what is it
• 1:14
  small dog's bark?
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: Sound like it would be more like a more like
• 1:19
  what's a scary bark?
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: Bar?
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: That's that's a scary sounds like sounds like a man
• 1:25
  at school getting sick.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: I just threw up. So we're gonna be reading some
• 1:31
  of the ogs today.
• 1:32
  Speaker 4: We've gone through a lot of the big ones, small
• 1:34
  dogs of course, a big one. There's a couple other
• 1:35
  more niche ones that we'll remember. For one reason of another.
• 1:38
  It should be an enjoyable episode. I think Hunter's gonna
• 1:42
  have a terrible time, which means I'm gonna have great one.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: So I'm looking forward to I'm gonna have a good time.
• 1:48
  What are you doing over there?
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: I'm doodling a man with his face melting. That's what
• 1:56
  that would sound like. Slip that under here, that's gone.
• 2:03
  Speaker 2: Smile. Did you ever like, yeah, it doesn't.
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: Your mom was telling me yesterday when I was talking
• 2:11
  to her about uh, that when you were a kid,
• 2:14
  someone at a church you all went to recommended that
• 2:17
  you see a psychiatrist.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: That is true. That's true. That was the last to
• 2:23
  that church.
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: They literally were like, we actually don't want him coming
• 2:27
  back to the congregation. And I think I see some
• 2:32
  of the oka draw guy with eyes.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: Just the fact that like that's that wasn't being talked
• 2:37
  about or anything, but that's just where your brain trails
• 2:39
  off to draw stuff like that.
• 2:42
  Speaker 2: Okay, they would never recommended you go on medication or
• 2:44
  anything like that. I was pick that was good, all right, smile.
• 2:53
  Speaker 3: Get into smile dog here just want to thank everyone
• 2:55
  who is on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and give us
• 2:57
  those beautiful ratings.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: That really does help us.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: Also our patrons.
• 3:01
  Speaker 2: Hey, I love you, I miss you. Welcome back.
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: Right, we have merch.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: We got merch. Do you need some clothes for your
• 3:13
  beautiful body? Yep?
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: Why cover it? Let it hang out, let's be free.
• 3:18
  Speaker 2: Some hats, some shirts, backpack.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: Actually I'm saying don't buy it.
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: You're saying don't buy it. No where you're saying don't
• 3:24
  buy it.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: No, never mind the link is there, but no, don't
• 3:30
  do it. Why shouldn't we buy it.
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to because they're gonna be like dad says,
• 3:36
  to not buy it. Therefore I want it right. It's
• 3:40
  like if you tell your kid don't smoke pot, what
• 3:42
  do you want to do? Wants to go smoke pot?
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: Don't go get the merch.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: You would look real silly. Where are you looking at?
• 3:52
  You keep looking over here.
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: I'lle don't go get it, thank you all. I'll turn
• 4:00
  the phones off all recording due.
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: That was why alarm I said last night to wake
• 4:05
  up in the morning, but I put it to PM
• 4:07
  and I just like, there is no way we're ever
• 4:12
  gonna actually get ahead.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: There's no way where where we are.
• 4:16
  Speaker 3: It is Sissyphis, It is Siphis rolling the ball up.
• 4:20
  Speaker 2: The hill for then.
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: The p and the a look kind.
• 4:25
  Speaker 4: Of mind you his alarm to wake up was gonna
• 4:29
  be nine thirty eight.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: I've seen him.
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: I've seen him wake up before, and it's haunting. It's
• 4:35
  like a it's like a war vet waking up. Literally,
• 4:37
  he like he sits there. He's either completely dead or
• 4:39
  then when he decides to wake up, he does like
• 4:43
  I just imagine this morning, some kind of internal like
• 4:46
  demon was in his brain that fucking woke him up
• 4:50
  on time.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: Luckily. What's how are you going to bed? Oh?
• 4:54
  Speaker 5: I mean last night I went to bed at three
• 4:56
  and then I woke up at seven.
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: Twenty to get to the airport. So why'd you do that?
• 5:01
  I could have drove him to the airport. I didn't
• 5:04
  want you to be mad? At are you? Is that legitimate?
• 5:08
  Is that a legitimate thing? Wait? Every time you gotta
• 5:13
  take him to the airport.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: But because you know why he comes in at okay,
• 5:19
  well yes, what that?
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: But then whenever I go out, I've gotten him every
• 5:23
  time he comes in at like midnight, like, okay, that's fine.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: I guess.
• 5:27
  Speaker 3: He's like, well, the tickets are thirty dollars cheaper, okay, right, right, whatever,
• 5:33
  And then when I go to his neck of the woods,
• 5:37
  he's like, that's too much my drive.
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, fair, that's fair.
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: Right, So it's bullshit, okay, Well, can I just say
• 5:46
  can I just say that when I landed here yesterday,
• 5:49
  I wish I was in a Goop shoot and you
• 5:52
  didn't tell me about any of that. I land here,
• 5:55
  He's I'm like, hey, I'm gonna be there Thursday at three.
• 5:57
  Speaker 4: Hunters like Thursday at three and got it. Thursday at three,
• 6:01
  I gave you a strike. Thursday at three.
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: I'm like, hey, man, nothing.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: That is rare though that's ongoing.
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: Fifteen minutes later, I call Hunter nothing.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: I was in a group suit.
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: I texted the group chat. Harry's like are you here?
• 6:18
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, I am, And Harry's like, do you need
• 6:21
  a ride?
• 6:22
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, well, I guess not.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: I guess not.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: I was. I was inful week. I uber over here
• 6:30
  and there's forty people here, not just like we had
• 6:35
  we had cameras on the think about Hunter, he never
• 6:39
  tells you anything that can't possibly.
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: He's just like what I am for?
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they know because they work with you. I know
• 6:48
  they know. Hunter's like, I feel like I feel.
• 6:50
  Speaker 1: Like I'm overbearing. I feel like I tell them too much.
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: No, no, maybe them specifically, but other people. It's like, hey,
• 6:57
  like you want to do something, and I'm like yeah,
• 6:59
  and he goes cool, and then I'll get there and
• 7:01
  there will be like eighteen things happening at once.
• 7:04
  Speaker 3: And he was like yeah, so like just just no,
• 7:09
  to be fair, to be completely transparent.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: The shoot day got pushed back and it slipped my mind.
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: Okay, so this was not even going on. So okay
• 7:17
  is that true?
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: Sure?
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: Sure, but me and you talked about me coming in.
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: Tuesday, So that means while you were on the shoot,
• 7:28
  you were like, he doesn't need to know, he'll figure
• 7:32
  it out. Thursday shot got pushed. Got it.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: The shoot got pushed, and it slipped my mind.
• 7:38
  Speaker 4: It is it is a lot of acts that during
• 7:41
  the shoot we were Can I just say it never
• 7:44
  brought it up?
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: Or what is the art? Smile dog?
• 7:48
  Speaker 4: No, no, no, you're not getting out of this one.
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: You got to get to the walking up the hill
• 7:54
  with your little Oh yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, thank you, Harry,
• 7:57
  thank you. I get I get here, I get it.
• 8:00
  So I have to uber over to my friend's house. Right.
• 8:03
  The driver's are like, oh, it's just like a buddy
• 8:04
  of yours. And I'm like allegedly.
• 8:07
  Speaker 4: We get up to the house, we get we pull
• 8:10
  up to the fence and he's like, you want me
• 8:11
  to drive you up? And I'm like, to be honest,
• 8:13
  Hunter didn't give me any or sorry, my friend didn't
• 8:16
  give me any directions. I don't know if you know
• 8:20
  what door he's in, what room he's in. I don't
• 8:22
  even know if he wants you to come, and so
• 8:23
  we'll just stay here. He's like, are you sure it's raining.
• 8:26
  I'm like, yeah, I'm sure. So I get out in
• 8:30
  the rain and I have my little rolling backpack and
• 8:34
  I just start walking up Hunter's driveway.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: And then I looked to the house and I'm like, well,
• 8:41
  if my friend was in there, I guess he'd probably
• 8:44
  be looking for me, So he must not be there.
• 8:47
  Come to find out, Allison was just watching me the
• 8:50
  whole time, just.
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: Did it wave, did it like he's over there, just
• 8:56
  looked from the house, watch me in the rain.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: I walk all the way up the hill.
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: I get to the top and Harry comes outside because
• 9:04
  he cares. Harry comes outside and he was like, okay, Isaiah.
• 9:08
  I'm like, oh, hi, are you guys in there? No
• 9:11
  concept of different people being here, anything going on. He
• 9:15
  was like, yeah, you can set your stuff in here.
• 9:17
  I'll show you the new building. I'm like, oh wow,
• 9:19
  there's a new building. I set my stuff in one door.
• 9:23
  Go to this new building. I open a door. There
• 9:26
  are I kids, You're not thirty five people standing around
• 9:31
  on a movie set doing things, and I'm just like,
• 9:37
  what is going on?
• 9:39
  Speaker 3: I'll be the bigger man and admit that I was wrong.
• 9:43
  I should have been more intentive. But I will say,
• 9:45
  can I have two words? I have two Can I
• 9:48
  have two words? Goop suit?
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: It is.
• 9:52
  Speaker 3: If I didn't have the goop suit on, this whole
• 9:55
  thing would have been a It would have been fine.
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: So so two things would have been fine.
• 9:59
  Speaker 4: Actually, either, hey, you're gonna walk onto a movie.
• 10:03
  Speaker 2: So I didn't think that would be you know what
• 10:07
  I would it wasn't a big deal. It wasn't a
• 10:08
  big deal.
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: I'm saying with that information, I would have said, oh
• 10:12
  I can uber that's true.
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: Or I'll be the bigger man and admit that's true,
• 10:18
  or even then just say, hey, can you uber over?
• 10:22
  I will be the bigger man for I will then
• 10:28
  decide because because I reached, do I pay you back?
• 10:32
  I reached this decision point when I got to the
• 10:35
  Kansas City Airport, like the end of it, where I'm like, well,
• 10:38
  I could leave security and go outside, but I don't
• 10:41
  know if he's coming.
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: So I guess I'll sit here and over dramatic, and
• 10:47
  then I ate a cinnabon and then I just sat
• 10:49
  there for a while.
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: That was That was more of a terrorist act than anything.
• 10:52
  It was.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: It was not even to be leading the airport being like, well,
• 10:55
  I guess one cinnabon.
• 10:57
  Speaker 2: Wouldn't I was in the wind.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: Why did you text Harry sooner?
• 11:02
  Speaker 2: I did? I did text him.
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: You know what, I responded when you text the group chat,
• 11:06
  But look at the look at the time code.
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: That's what I'm doing, right time code, Harry. You say, okay, okay,
• 11:13
  Harry can verify what I'm saying.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: We're all This is also a horror Story podcast.
• 11:17
  Speaker 4: By the way, I landed, I landed early at two
• 11:22
  forty six that's not my fault. That's the I landed
• 11:25
  to Actually, I said landed when we got to the gate.
• 11:28
  So I landed like earlier, called it my fault, I said,
• 11:31
  landed fifteen minutes early.
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: Nothing.
• 11:34
  Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, I walk all the way to the front.
• 11:36
  Right before I got to make the decisions where I
• 11:38
  can't come back into the airport. I call Hunter at
• 11:44
  three eleven, so I was, so that's fourteen.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: That's twenty five minutes. I call hunter. Hunter doesn't say anything.
• 11:54
  I then go to the group chat and I say
• 11:58
  at three twelve, I'm going to build a tint in
• 12:02
  the airport. And then that was a three twelve five
• 12:09
  minutes later.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: Harry, if you already been waiting.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: Says, what thirty minutes?
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: A half hour in front of cinemon if you were early,
• 12:20
  so technically break it even about ten minutes to one.
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: Youre Switzerland, that's fall.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: He says, what happened? I said nothing. I'm just giving.
• 12:31
  I'm just giving.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: What happened is funny.
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: It's happened. I thought to myself, does he even know
• 12:37
  I'm coming? Does he even though that.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: You're here? Question mark delayed or something?
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: No, it was three it was when the plane would
• 12:48
  be here. I said, okay, So I said, I'm going
• 12:52
  to bitch a tint and Harry says, well, but I
• 12:55
  said nothing, I'm just giving a hard time. Says they're
• 12:58
  gonna have a boner, and then there shut it, and
• 13:01
  then I said, and then I said.
• 13:05
  Speaker 3: I got a big old boner the airport. No one's
• 13:08
  booking me up.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: So I guess one of your bits.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: So no one's booking up. I'm getting hard, don't know, no,
• 13:15
  I said, I said nothing. I'm here in.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Kansas, kids, I'm an Indian, and I got a tepee.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: Harry says the audacity. By the way, Harry says, do
• 13:31
  you need a ride?
• 13:35
  Speaker 2: One minute later, and then sixty seconds and then he
• 13:38
  says Hunter is covered in go and slidoop shoot again.
• 13:42
  I have no concept of a film or anything, so
• 13:45
  that would be confusing.
• 13:46
  Speaker 3: I think I'll be a bigger man here, and I
• 13:49
  will admit that that would be confusing.
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: I thought you were shooting a Papa Meat video and
• 13:53
  like there was some bit where you have Nickelodeon slim
• 13:55
  on you or something. I'm like, oh, okay, whatever, So
• 13:58
  I said, LMO, I can uber so I do that,
• 14:03
  and once again I walk. Oh yeah, here's me walking
• 14:07
  up the driveway at three fifty eight pm after I
• 14:12
  got over an hour later, I'm walking in.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: I say, are y'all in the studio?
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: Once again, no one gives me any heads up, and
• 14:21
  here he says, are you outside?
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: I'll come get you.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: And then once again walk into a room and I'm
• 14:29
  just it's I'm surrounded.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: You know what, and fat and fault.
• 14:36
  Speaker 4: And then he steps away from the set, walks over
• 14:40
  to me, and the first thing he says to me is,
• 14:45
  look who decided to show up?
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: I forgot about that?
• 15:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what that was?
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: That was rude. It is what that was. That was rude.
• 15:04
  And obviously there has to be some kind of payback.
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: And you know what I'll do whenever I go out
• 15:08
  to visit you next time, I'm not gonna ask for
• 15:11
  a ride.
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: And I'll tell you what I'll do too. I will
• 15:13
  literally film myself sitting in an airport for an hour.
• 15:16
  I will do that for you.
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: I will do that, and I'll say, worry even, and
• 15:20
  then I'll take an uber wherever I need to go.
• 15:22
  Speaker 4: But it has well, it can't be the next trip.
• 15:24
  It has to be randomly one trip, you're gonna lay it.
• 15:27
  I'm just not gonna say anything.
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: I'll take it.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: I'll do I see it.
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: That's not fair though, because you never respond to text anyways.
• 15:38
  How many times have I texted you sir?
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: No, no, No, that's completely different. Okay, that's different because how
• 15:43
  would I know?
• 15:44
  Speaker 4: That's because you text me out of the blue, and
• 15:46
  whenever I'm working during the day, it's just a schedule
• 15:48
  by time. My point is I set my phone away
• 15:50
  so don't get distracted. I'm real bad about post.
• 15:52
  Speaker 3: So you'll say, because you know that I'm showing up
• 15:54
  that you'll be looking at exactly.
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: Okay, yes, I see it.
• 15:57
  Speaker 4: Just once again, I had said two days prior Thursday,
• 16:00
  three pm.
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, yeah, No, I was in the wrong.
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: I'll be the big man.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: I'll take the high road, admit I'm wrong.
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: I was wrong.
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: I was a bad boy.
• 16:12
  Speaker 3: I should have been in the Goop suit, should have
• 16:15
  reconsidered this, could have even probably pushed this a week probably,
• 16:19
  I don't know.
• 16:19
  Speaker 4: I want you to put Look, this all would have
• 16:22
  been mediated with a hey can you uber.
• 16:26
  Speaker 3: Absolutely shouldn't have had the hands on, shouldn't have had
• 16:29
  the goop on me.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: No, I was in a group suit.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: All that was great, All that was fine.
• 16:33
  Speaker 4: Just make me look when I'm on the phone, because
• 16:36
  when I was talking to you texting, you were in
• 16:39
  another Goop suit.
• 16:41
  Speaker 2: Two days prior on Tuesday.
• 16:44
  Speaker 3: When I'm like, I didn't have my arms on though,
• 16:48
  couldn't have used my phone.
• 16:50
  Speaker 4: My point is, I look, once it happened, once I
• 16:54
  was there at three pm, you were in the Goop suit.
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: What's done was done exactly. Well, i'll tell you what.
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: It's already passed.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: Life good.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: We're here now, aren't we.
• 17:02
  Speaker 3: We lived, and we're about to read Smile Dog, which
• 17:05
  is arguably one of the best creamy pastas.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: Of all time.
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: That's all what I said. But okay, all right, Smile Dog.
• 17:10
  All right.
• 17:12
  Speaker 4: So the original Smile Dog was uploading twenty ten, so
• 17:15
  it's like a dinosaur compared to all the others, right,
• 17:18
  And it was an image started to float around the Internet,
• 17:20
  and the story accompanied it.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: So let me look up the smile Dog image.
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: I think it's on the story. My page isn't loading
• 17:27
  for some reason. There's so many Papa beds, creepypasta.
• 17:30
  Speaker 3: Creepy Oh yeah, so this this this image is so
• 17:33
  fucking stupid.
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: Is this the actual image of looking like the husky
• 17:37
  that's like this, Yeah, that's the classic smile dog.
• 17:39
  Speaker 4: So this was like a people float around in Shane emails. Yeah,
• 17:42
  and it was like share this with ten people or
• 17:44
  else or you die. Yeah, yeah, one of those things.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: And there's a story attached to it on the link
• 17:50
  in the chat, it just ads for Travago.
• 17:55
  Speaker 3: I will say, creepypasta dot com. I don't know what
• 17:58
  we have to do to get these ads a little
• 18:00
  more manageable, because right now I have a all Spanish.
• 18:04
  It says, soy Marciella, Mama, mama, y active Octavistia, you
• 18:09
  not me done.
• 18:11
  Speaker 4: My page is all white, but the ads are loading,
• 18:14
  so it's half of Superman space.
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: And now it's a coach ad.
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: I got hotels dot com right now.
• 18:23
  Speaker 3: Well, their mom is supposed to be good fucking money
• 18:25
  if they'll get these ads, good lord, all right? Also
• 18:29
  anonymously written right, No, we don't know who the author is.
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: No, there's an author court. I literally can't open the page.
• 18:34
  Hold on, give me a second.
• 18:39
  Speaker 3: While this is happening, I'm going to for audio listeners
• 18:41
  at home. I am drawing smile though. There we go
• 18:45
  at the moment while Isaiah loads.
• 18:46
  Speaker 4: His dude, I opened Safari on here. The last thing
• 18:49
  that was opened on Safari was Brosco Part five on this.
• 18:55
  Speaker 2: What a could I get a slight replay of what Brosco?
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: The reaction of that was, well, I'm back. I don't
• 19:01
  think it'll be as that bad. Well have you read
• 19:03
  Smile Dog before?
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: Well? Yeah, yeah, okay, so you're familiar. Is this like
• 19:08
  twenty years old? By now? Came out of twenty ten?
• 19:17
  That's like twenty years old.
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: It's just saying like one hundred years old. This is
• 19:22
  like a did Charlie Chaplin write this story?
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: I didn't hear the twenty ten part. I was just
• 19:31
  asking no reason to jump on the little guy. I
• 19:41
  don't I canna find the story? Can I say? Can
• 19:43
  I at least ask this question?
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, a smile Dog, if you had to say cut
• 19:47
  or uncut?
• 19:47
  Speaker 2: What would you say? I'm not answering that. Don't encourage him.
• 19:54
  What are you gonna say? Not? Whatever he wants me to?
• 20:00
  Who would cut? Smile Dog?
• 20:12
  Speaker 6: I I happy, I'll lift it up, no wondering, smiling.
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: Smiled with there's nothing but bet agreed, you've got to
• 20:30
  censor that.
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely, I'm actually gonna talk it on
• 20:38
  there too.
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: Yikes, Okay, we'll work on my phone. Hold, what are
• 20:46
  you looking on?
• 20:46
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to find the story, but just I'd like
• 20:50
  to take a quick break from the show to think.
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  Thank you to rocket money for sponsoring the show. We
• 22:24
  are now back to the episode. There it is look, no, no,
• 22:29
  that's the other one. This is wait, hold on, didn't work?
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: When did that what the what is that about? On
• 22:41
  the website only appears in the left. We have not
• 22:44
  read one.
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: From the story party longer than it takes the story.
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: The story. Yeah, the story is shorter than what we've
• 22:53
  been doing.
• 22:54
  Speaker 3: All right now, I'm in smile dog, creepypasta from the top.
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah, from the top, Hold on the pad. Okay, I'm
• 23:01
  good now, all right, rough, rough, let's begin.
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: I first met in person with Mary E in the
• 23:10
  summer of two thousand and seven. I had arranged with
• 23:12
  her husband fifteen years Terrence, see her for an interview.
• 23:16
  Mary had initially agreed, since I was not a newsman,
• 23:19
  but rather an amateur writer gathering information for a few
• 23:22
  early college assignments and if all want, according to plan,
• 23:25
  some pieces of fiction. We scheduled the interview for a
• 23:29
  particular weekend when I was in Chicago on unrelated business.
• 23:32
  But at the last moment, Mary changed her mind locked
• 23:35
  herself in the couple's bedroom, refusing to meet with me.
• 23:39
  Speaker 2: For and a half an hour, I sat with Terrence.
• 23:41
  Speaker 4: As we camped outside the bedroom door, I listening and
• 23:44
  taking notes while he attempted fruitlessly to call him his wife.
• 23:47
  The things Mary said made little sense, but fit with
• 23:50
  the pattern I was expecting. Though I could not see her,
• 23:52
  I could tell from her voice that she was crying,
• 23:55
  and more often than not, her objections to speaking with
• 23:57
  me centered around an incoherent diet on.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: Her dreams or nightmares.
• 24:02
  Speaker 4: Parent's apologized profusely when we seize the exercise, and I
• 24:06
  did my best to take it and shrine recall that
• 24:10
  I wasn't a reporter in search of a story, but
• 24:12
  merely a curious young man in search of information. Besides,
• 24:16
  I thought at the time I could perhaps find another
• 24:19
  similar case if I put my mind in resources to it.
• 24:23
  Mary E was the sy OP for PYO, not the
• 24:30
  S S.
• 24:31
  Speaker 2: Why.
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: I mean, it looks like O, but it's it's a.
• 24:37
  Is there a word AOP?
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: A word? No S Y S O pH? Is that
• 24:44
  a company? Now? It says? Mary E was the SYSOP
• 24:48
  for a small Chicago based bulletin board system.
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: Oh system of uh oh, yeah, thank you.
• 24:59
  Speaker 4: Mary. He was the cissof was that just the last straw?
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: I just it's just so much being berated and having
• 25:23
  him chime in.
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: Oh, this STEM operator, it's too late in the day.
• 25:31
  It's too late for me. They don't know recorded this.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: At two in the morning. Can I tell you a secret.
• 25:40
  I'm a desperate need of medical attention and care. I'm
• 25:43
  so old, fat, and I'm falling apart at the seas.
• 25:47
  But I don't know what doctor to use. I don't
• 25:49
  know anything about doctors.
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: And that's why I use zok doc.
• 25:53
  Speaker 7: Zark doc is a free app a Websitehere you can
• 25:55
  searching a pair of high quality in network doctors, choose
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  the right one for your needs, and click to instantly
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  book and appointment. We're talking about in network appointments with
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  more than one hundred thousand healthcare providers across every specialty
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  from mental health to digital health, I care to skincare.
• 26:12
  Speaker 8: And much much more, probably Dick and boll stuff boys.
• 26:15
  Speaker 7: And A nice thing about ZocDoc is that you can
• 26:17
  filter it for doctors to take your insurance.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: Are nearby and are highly rated.
• 26:22
  Speaker 7: It's super easy to use, and you can find an
• 26:24
  appointment time that works for you with the right doctor
• 26:27
  for your needs. Plus, docdoc appointments happen fast, typically within
• 26:32
  just twenty four to seventy two hours of booking. You
• 26:34
  can even score same day appointments. Oh my god, you
• 26:37
  don't want to admit it, but you should probably see
• 26:39
  a doctor.
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: So stop putting off those doctor appointments.
• 26:41
  Speaker 7: To go to ZocDoc dot com slash creat cast to
• 26:45
  find an instantly book a top rated doctor today.
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: That's zoc doc dot com, slash.
• 26:51
  Speaker 7: Creatcast, zotdoc dot com, slash creek cast.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: Mary this off for a small Chicago based bulletin board
• 27:04
  system in nineteen ninety two when she first encountered smile
• 27:07
  dot jpeg and her life changed forever.
• 27:10
  Speaker 3: Smile dot japeck, my life is forever ruined.
• 27:17
  Speaker 1: I should not have opened that compressed image.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: Okay, sorry.
• 27:23
  Speaker 4: She and Terrence had been married for only five months.
• 27:26
  Mary was one of an estimated four hundred people who
• 27:29
  saw the image when it was posted as hyperlink on
• 27:32
  the BBS, though she is the only one who has
• 27:35
  spoken openly about the experience. The rest have remained anonymous
• 27:40
  or are perhaps dead. In two thousand and five, when
• 27:43
  I was only in tenth grade, smile dot jpeg was
• 27:45
  first brought to my attention by my burgeoning interest in
• 27:48
  web based phenomena. Mary was the most often cited victim
• 27:52
  of what is sometimes referred to as smile dot Dog
• 27:56
  the bean smile dot jpeg is reputed to display. What
• 28:01
  caught my interest other than the obvious macab elements of
• 28:04
  the cyber legend of my proclivity towards such things, was
• 28:08
  the sheer lack of information, usually to the point that
• 28:11
  people don't believe it even exists other than as a
• 28:13
  rumor hoax. It's unique because though the entire phenomenon center
• 28:18
  is on a picture file, the file is nowhere to
• 28:20
  be found on the Internet. Certainly, many photo manipulated simlacra
• 28:23
  loaded the web, showing up with the most frequency on
• 28:26
  sites such as the image board four chan, particularly the
• 28:30
  x focused paranormal sub board. It is suspected these are
• 28:34
  fakes because they do not have the effect the true
• 28:36
  smile dot jpeg is believed to have, namely sudden onset
• 28:39
  temporal lobe epilepsy and acute anxiety.
• 28:43
  Speaker 1: What the fuck is even happening?
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: Okay, so it's just a doctor's report.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: What the fuck are we read?
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: Kay?
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: So it's someone who's like done research, tried to track
• 28:54
  down the true smile dog. But whatever this image is.
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: This smile dog or smile JP smile dot.
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: J peg is the name of the file right that
• 29:01
  got passed around and that's what he's looking for.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: That's what he's looking for. And then this woman was
• 29:06
  corrupted by it. She's the only one who's talked about
• 29:08
  it that he can find.
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: She saw about it, right, yea, And so he says,
• 29:13
  the smile dog images are people recreating it from rumors.
• 29:17
  The real image when you look at it causes ebsolepsy, nausea.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Like an intense mental reaction to it. That's what we're saying.
• 29:25
  Speaker 4: And all the images that float around are just like
• 29:27
  fakes of the real thing.
• 29:29
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 29:30
  Speaker 4: The purported reaction in the viewer is one of the
• 29:32
  reasons the phantom like smile dot jpeg is regarded with
• 29:35
  such disdain, since it is patently absurd, though depending on
• 29:40
  whom you ask, the reluctance to acknowledge smile dot JPEG's
• 29:42
  existence might be just as much out of fear as
• 29:46
  it is out of disbelief. Neither smile dot jpeg nor
• 29:50
  smile dot dog is mentioned anywhere on Wikipedia, though the
• 29:53
  website features articles on such other, perhaps more scandalous shock
• 29:57
  sides as Hello dot jpeg or two Girls, one Cup.
• 30:01
  Any attempt to create a page pertaining to smile dot
• 30:04
  jpeg is summarily deleted by any of the encyclopedia's many admins.
• 30:10
  Encounters of smile dot jpeg are the stuff of Internet legend.
• 30:13
  Marye's story is not unique. There are unverified rumors of
• 30:17
  smile dot jpeg showing up in the early days of Usenet,
• 30:20
  and even one persistent tale that in two thousand and
• 30:22
  two a hacker flooded the Forms of Humor and Satire
• 30:25
  website Something Awful with a deluge of smile dot dog pictures,
• 30:29
  where during almost half the form's users at the time epileptic.
• 30:33
  It's also said that in the midtal late nineties that
• 30:35
  smile dot jpeg circulated on Usenet and as an attachment
• 30:39
  of a chain email with the subject line smile God
• 30:43
  Loves You. Despite the huge exposure these stunts would generate,
• 30:47
  there are very few people who admit to having experienced
• 30:50
  any of them. No trace of the file or any
• 30:52
  link has ever been discovered. Those who claim to have
• 30:55
  seen smile dot jpeg often weakly joke that they were
• 30:58
  far too busy to save a co of the picture
• 31:00
  to their hard drive. However, all edged victims offer the
• 31:04
  same description of the photo, a doglike creature, usually described
• 31:09
  as appearing similar to a Siberian husky, illuminated by the
• 31:13
  flash of the camera, sits in a dim room, the
• 31:16
  only background to detail that is visible being a human
• 31:19
  hand extending from the darkness near the left side of
• 31:21
  the frame. Hands empty, but is usually described as beckoning.
• 31:25
  Of course, most attentions given to the dog or dog creature,
• 31:28
  as some victims are more certain than others about what
• 31:31
  they claim to have seen. The muzzle of the beast
• 31:34
  is reputedly split in a wide grin meiling, two rows,
• 31:38
  very white, very straight, very sharp, very human looking teeth.
• 31:41
  Mm is that funny, Hunty?
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: It's like veneer dog? Scary.
• 31:50
  Speaker 4: This is of course not a description given immediately after
• 31:53
  viewing the picture, but rather a recollection of the victims
• 31:57
  who claim to have seen the picture endlessly repeated in
• 31:59
  their i during the time they are in reality having
• 32:03
  epileptic fits. These fits are reported to continue indeterminably often
• 32:10
  while the victims of sleep, resulting in very vivid and
• 32:12
  disturbing nightmares. These may be treated with medication, though in
• 32:16
  some it's more effective than others.
• 32:19
  Speaker 2: Mary E. I assumed was not on effective medication.
• 32:22
  Speaker 4: That was why after my visitor apartment two thousand and seven,
• 32:25
  sent out feelers to several folklore and urban legend oriented newsgroups, websites,
• 32:30
  and mailing list hoping to find the name of a
• 32:32
  supposed victim of smile dot jpeg who felt more interested
• 32:36
  in talking about his experiences. Bird time, nothing happened, and
• 32:40
  at length I forgot completely about my pursuits since I
• 32:42
  had begun my freshman year of college and was quite busy.
• 32:45
  Mary contacted me via email. However, near the beginning of
• 32:49
  March two thousand.
• 32:49
  Speaker 3: And eight, this is added by Moose Juice Moose Juice
• 32:53
  to jml at redacted dot com from MARYE at redacted
• 32:59
  dot net, subject last summer's interview description.
• 33:04
  Speaker 9: Dear mister l I'm incredibly sorry about my behavior last
• 33:07
  summer when you came to interview me. I helpe you
• 33:09
  understand then it was it was no fault of yours,
• 33:12
  but rather my own problems that led me to act
• 33:15
  out as I did. I realized that I could have
• 33:17
  handled the situation more decorously. However, I hope you will
• 33:21
  forgive me. At the time, I was afraid. You see,
• 33:25
  for fifteen years, I've been haunted by smile dot jpeg,
• 33:28
  smile dot dog comes to me in my sleep every night.
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: Did you like that? Then you get a kick out
• 33:36
  of that one? I got me every night. Speaker on
• 33:42
  the corner like a big goofy has a smile at
• 33:49
  one point.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: Is it just not scary anymore? Decided very husky that
• 33:54
  smiling at you, big fucking chompers.
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: I'm just like that. I'd just be like, close the door, right.
• 34:02
  I know that sounds silly, but it is true.
• 34:06
  Speaker 9: There's an ineffable quality about my dreams, my nightmares, that
• 34:10
  makes them completely unlike any real dreams I've ever had.
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: I do not move and do not speak.
• 34:15
  Speaker 9: I simply look ahead, and the only thing ahead of
• 34:18
  me is the scene from that horrible picture. I see
• 34:20
  the beckoning hand, and I see smile dot dog. It
• 34:24
  talks to me. It is not a dog, of course,
• 34:27
  though I'm not quite sure what it really is. It
• 34:30
  tells me it will leave me alone if I do
• 34:32
  it as it asks. All I must do, it says,
• 34:35
  is spread the word. That is how its phrases its demands.
• 34:40
  I know exactly what it means. It wants me to
• 34:43
  show it to someone else, and I could. The week
• 34:47
  after my incident, I received the mail a Manila envelope
• 34:50
  with no return address. Inside was only three and a
• 34:52
  half inch floppy disc head. Without having to check, I
• 34:56
  knew precisely.
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: What was on it.
• 34:58
  Speaker 9: I thought for a long time on my own options.
• 35:01
  I could show it to a stranger, a co worker.
• 35:04
  I can even show it to Terrence. As much as
• 35:06
  the idea disgusted me. And what would happen to then? Well,
• 35:10
  A smile dot dog kept its word. I could sleep.
• 35:14
  Yet if it lied, what would I do? And who
• 35:17
  was to say? Something worse would not come for me
• 35:20
  if I did with a creature ass So I did
• 35:23
  nothing for fifteen years, though I kept it the set
• 35:26
  hidden amongst many things, amongst my things.
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: Every night for fifteen.
• 35:31
  Speaker 3: Years, smiled the dog has come to me in my
• 35:34
  sleep and demanded that I spread the word.
• 35:36
  Speaker 2: For fifteen years I have stood strong. It's a serious
• 35:44
  humor every fifteen every night.
• 35:51
  Speaker 3: Literally imagine. Also, can you explain to me I don't
• 35:57
  not to derail this email? What the fuck does a
• 36:00
  beckoning hand look like?
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: Is it just this? Yeah? Yeah, it's like inviting so
• 36:08
  so if so you're saying, is that every night he's
• 36:10
  doing this, he's just like spread the.
• 36:12
  Speaker 4: Word behind smile Dog is a beckoning hand off scene.
• 36:18
  Spread the word like there's a hand behind smile dog, and.
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: That's just what he's done every night.
• 36:22
  Speaker 3: Well, I mean, if anything, you can admire his tenacity,
• 36:24
  his persistence, but if you just don't spread the word,
• 36:27
  I mean, there's no repercussions beside him just showing up
• 36:30
  and being like, seriously, you're just fucking spread this word
• 36:34
  as off.
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: She's been a sleep every night.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: By the way, well, something like you said. At some point,
• 36:41
  it's like you don't.
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: Know what the fuck am I going to do?
• 36:44
  Speaker 9: Okay, for fifteen years, I have stood strong, though there
• 36:48
  have been hard times. Many of my fellow victims on
• 36:51
  the BBS board where I.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: First encountered smiled that jpeg stopped posting.
• 36:56
  Speaker 3: I heard some of them committed suicide, committed unliving, others
• 36:59
  remaining completely silent, simply disappearing off.
• 37:02
  Speaker 2: The face of the web. They're the ones I worry
• 37:04
  about the most.
• 37:05
  Speaker 9: I sincerely hope you will forgive me, mister l But
• 37:08
  last summer, when you contacted me and my husband.
• 37:10
  Speaker 3: About an interview, I was near the breaking point.
• 37:12
  Speaker 9: I decided I was going to give you the floppy
• 37:14
  dussette I did not care Smile dot Dog was lying
• 37:18
  or not. I wanted it to end. You were a stranger,
• 37:21
  so when I had no connection with and I thought
• 37:23
  I would not feel sorrow when you took the dcat
• 37:25
  as part of your research and sealed your fate before
• 37:29
  you arrived, I realized what I was doing, plotting to
• 37:31
  ruin your life.
• 37:33
  Speaker 3: I could not stand the thought, and in fact I
• 37:35
  still couldnot. I am ashamed, mister Ellen. I hope that
• 37:37
  this warning will dissuade you from further investigation of smile
• 37:41
  dot jpeg. You may, in time encounter someone who is,
• 37:44
  if not weaker than I, then wholly more depraved, someone
• 37:48
  who will not hesitate to follow smile dot Dog's orders.
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: Stop while you are still whole. Sincerely, Mary E.
• 37:56
  Speaker 4: Terrence contacted me later that month with the news that
• 37:59
  his wife killed herself.
• 38:03
  Speaker 10: Oh no, that's like a comedic timing beat.
• 38:22
  Speaker 3: After all of that, and then pretty much she totally
• 38:26
  blew her brains out.
• 38:29
  Speaker 2: I mean, it's not so.
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: She's been doing this for fifteen years, and now that's
• 38:34
  the break.
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: We left it the email goodbye, I did I just
• 38:39
  reread the word.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: Thanks, Honnor. I'm glad that's funny.
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: It gotta be good, okay, Well, cleaning up the various
• 38:52
  things she left behind, closing email accounts and the like,
• 38:55
  he happened upon the above message. He was a man
• 38:58
  in shambles. Wept as he told me to listen to
• 39:01
  his wife's advice. You found the diskette, he revealed, and
• 39:06
  burned it until it was nothing but a stinking.
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: Pile of black and plastic.
• 39:10
  Speaker 4: The most disturbed him, however, how the diskett had hissed,
• 39:13
  as at melted some sort of animal, he said. I
• 39:17
  will admit that I was a little uncertain about how
• 39:19
  to respond to this. At first, I thought perhaps it
• 39:23
  was a joke, with the couple belatedly playing with the
• 39:26
  situation in order to get a rise out of me.
• 39:29
  Quick check on several Chicago newspapers online bituaris, however, proved
• 39:33
  that mary E was indeed dead. There was, of course,
• 39:36
  no mention of suicide in the article. I decided that
• 39:39
  for a time at least, I would not further pursue
• 39:42
  the subject of smile dot jpeg, especially since I had
• 39:45
  finals coming up at the end of May.
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: But the world has odd ways of testing us.
• 39:49
  Speaker 4: Almost a full year after I'd returned from my disastrous
• 39:52
  interview with Mary e I received another email.
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: Two jml at redacted dot com from as I hear
• 40:01
  eighty two at redacted dot com. Subject smile Hello.
• 40:08
  Speaker 11: I thought just the bogue list your profile subject or
• 40:12
  smaller bar. I thought you respond as bottles or cells
• 40:16
  and I'm such a true here just spur the word
• 40:20
  spiraler first.
• 40:22
  Speaker 4: The final line shielded me to the bone. According to
• 40:26
  my email client, there was one file attached called naturally
• 40:30
  smile dot jpeg. I considered downloading it for some time.
• 40:35
  It's most likely a fake, I imagined, and even if
• 40:38
  it weren't, I was never wholly convinced of small dot
• 40:41
  JPEG's peculiar powers. Mary Ease account of shaking me yes,
• 40:45
  but she was probably mentally unbalanced anyway. After all, how
• 40:49
  good a simple image to a small dot jpeg was
• 40:51
  said to accomplish. What sort of creature was it that
• 40:54
  could break one's mind with only the power of the eye.
• 40:58
  And if such things were only absurd, why did the
• 41:01
  legend exist at all? By downloaded the image, if I
• 41:04
  looked at it, and if Mary turned out to be correct,
• 41:07
  if smile dot jpeck came to me in my dreams
• 41:10
  and Mandy.
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: And I spread the word. What would I do?
• 41:13
  Speaker 4: Would I lived my life as Mary had, biting against
• 41:15
  the urge to give in until I died? Or would
• 41:19
  I simply spread the word eager to be put to rest.
• 41:22
  If I chose the latter route, how could I do it?
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: And would I burden a turn? If I went through
• 41:28
  with my earlier intention to write a short article.
• 41:31
  Speaker 4: About smile dot jpeg, I decided I could attach it
• 41:34
  as evidence and anyone who read the article, anyone who
• 41:37
  took interest, would be affected. And even assuming small dot
• 41:41
  jpeck attached to the email was genuine, would.
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: I be capricious enough to save myself in that manner?
• 41:47
  Could I spread the word? Yes? Yes I could. Then
• 41:51
  bottom of the.
• 41:52
  Speaker 4: Image anywhere anyway it appeared online At the very bottom
• 41:55
  of the image was I thought a bloody thumbprint with
• 41:58
  the picture.
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: So author starts.
• 42:02
  Speaker 4: To track this, goes insane, and then eventually looks at
• 42:05
  the photo, which compels him to share it with the internet.
• 42:07
  Speaker 2: The uh.
• 42:08
  Speaker 3: I like the idea of at the end of no
• 42:10
  matter what, at the end of the story, you get
• 42:11
  kind of hit by it.
• 42:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 42:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, Also, this was very well written for or what
• 42:15
  it was at the time.
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: Well, yeah, very good. It was well rand as done.
• 42:19
  And also the context the images the image. The image
• 42:23
  is goofy. Also, where's the beckoning hand off to the left?
• 42:27
  Speaker 4: Look at the bottom left see the hand reaching up.
• 42:35
  Speaker 2: Once again those glasses. Oh I didn't notice that right now?
• 42:41
  What the fuck the hand?
• 42:43
  Speaker 3: So does it look like someone's dying, that someone's on
• 42:46
  the ground.
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, So the intention is that smile dogs like
• 42:53
  some entity like a demon or goes that has like
• 42:56
  like a shape shifter almost it's a dog but has
• 42:59
  human like it's a weird in between things. And the
• 43:02
  context for this story is this image.
• 43:04
  Speaker 4: Had already started floating online if I remember correctly, maybe
• 43:08
  they were around the same time. But people would get
• 43:10
  email chains that would say spread the word and it
• 43:12
  would be that picture. Right, It's like, what's that about?
• 43:15
  But then you see the story attached that it drives
• 43:17
  people mad.
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: They have to spread very much like a ring you, Yes,
• 43:20
  very similar minds you of ring you.
• 43:22
  Speaker 3: This is a fun time in the early two thousands
• 43:24
  where technology people were finding ways of like you're sharing
• 43:27
  media and it's cursed and everything. I did have a
• 43:30
  couple thoughts though the Veneers made me think of Turkey
• 43:34
  teeth or Turkey hair when people go to Turkey to
• 43:37
  get a hair transplant, or the Veneers. What if when
• 43:40
  you got a hair transplant from Turkey or Veneers, you
• 43:43
  had what if it was just a Turkish man that
• 43:45
  was smiling, that visited you every night, And then the
• 43:49
  thing is you had to have someone else go to
• 43:52
  Turkey get their hair to until he left you alone.
• 43:54
  Speaker 2: Smile Turkey smile.
• 44:03
  Speaker 1: Or Turkey dot JBB. Also, I want to do an edi.
• 44:07
  Speaker 2: Turkey is in a file. The compression this.
• 44:11
  Speaker 3: Is I do love I do love a file type
• 44:15
  just being dot Turkey. It's pretty good with a Turkey
• 44:18
  b t r k Y dot Turkey.
• 44:23
  Speaker 4: So I do want to say about this story. I
• 44:26
  read this when I was in middle school. I think
• 44:27
  for the yeah ten. I was probably eleven or twelve,
• 44:29
  and I came across it and I remember this story
• 44:31
  freaked me out because you gotta understand I was a kid.
• 44:33
  I saw the email the picture floating around, It's like,
• 44:36
  what's this picture?
• 44:37
  Speaker 2: Said? It's like a bloody Mary kind of thing. Same thing. Yeah,
• 44:41
  so I thought it'd be cool.
• 44:42
  Speaker 4: And after I realized the story I'm like, oh, this
• 44:44
  is cool. I'm going to send it to my friends.
• 44:46
  They'll be funny. So I started an email chain where
• 44:49
  I said, like, spread the word and put the email on.
• 44:52
  Speaker 2: And then the next day at school, every.
• 44:55
  Speaker 4: Guy was like, that was the dumbest thing I've ever
• 44:57
  seen in my entire life, don't you ever?
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: And they immediately just like.
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: It's scary, right, guys, know it's scary, guys.
• 45:05
  Speaker 3: Honestly, you know you're My birthday is this week when
• 45:07
  I have a pool party with water balloon fight and stuff.
• 45:10
  Speaker 1: You're not coming.
• 45:11
  Speaker 2: I remember being like, yeah, I thought it was lame.
• 45:15
  That's why I should said it was a joke. You didn't.
• 45:17
  I thought it was awesome. It's ice cream cake.
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: That's really dumb.
• 45:20
  Speaker 2: Right.
• 45:21
  Speaker 3: You know some people the water balloons that look like grenades,
• 45:24
  it's gonna be awesome.
• 45:25
  Speaker 2: Those were so cold.
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: You're not coming because of that one email?
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: No, I thought it was I would love to sit there.
• 45:31
  Open it up, look at my subject line, what is
• 45:33
  this whatever?
• 45:34
  Speaker 2: Scroll down? Oh okay, well download it and you know,
• 45:38
  scroll down.
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: Click the Beatles cartoon last episode?
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, who's your favorite Beatle ringo?
• 45:48
  Speaker 4: He was just the goofyest about stuff like the song
• 45:51
  Maxwell's Silver Hammer. All of them hated it when they
• 45:54
  asked ring goes like, I thought it was kind of nice.
• 45:56
  Speaker 8: I enjoyed it, which I actually called a good title.
• 46:01
  Speaker 4: Ye no, not Ringo. What was the fourth one? Not
• 46:03
  Paul or John? George, George George one I'm thinking of, Yeah.
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: George is George is cool? Just no one likes ring
• 46:10
  of the yea, yeah, George George was like the one
• 46:12
  that was just unsung hero, George, the main man. And
• 46:18
  then when the Beetle, who's your least favorite Beatle?
• 46:22
  Speaker 1: John?
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: John? Of course? Easy, yep, John, I.
• 46:27
  Speaker 3: Like the little the fucking beaver tooth bastard. Paul McCartney
• 46:31
  quite a bit.
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: Me wants to hold Joe had and me wants to
• 46:38
  hold Joe Hian.
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: He was a good counter to John to my understanding,
• 46:42
  because John was like, no, we've got it. We've got
• 46:44
  to change the world, We've got to be different. And
• 46:46
  then paula be like, no, that's a dumb idea.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: I don't like that idea. Uh.
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: You know the Beatles.
• 46:54
  Speaker 3: It's one of those things when people were like the
• 46:56
  Beatles are lame. It's like it's impossible to not like
• 47:00
  at least one.
• 47:00
  Speaker 4: I mean it's it's like it's like anything else, look
• 47:03
  like oh Elvis was he didn't do anything, or like
• 47:06
  he was slaying.
• 47:07
  Speaker 2: It's like, I really like.
• 47:07
  Speaker 3: That one that new editor that keeps saying the meme
• 47:10
  where it's like songs didn't realize Elvis wrote and.
• 47:13
  Speaker 2: It's like Jompalds Joe bald House and.
• 47:15
  Speaker 1: Just where it's ricking Bardy time have seen that.
• 47:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, there is one night where Caitly and I were
• 47:25
  driving home and I was really tired, and uh, she
• 47:28
  was just flipping through songs and that Elvis song came on.
• 47:31
  I can't even remember which one of what the title
• 47:33
  of it is. But in the beginning, like I heard
• 47:35
  the music and I go, is this the song where
• 47:38
  he says I'm caught in a trap?
• 47:40
  Speaker 2: And as soon as I got done saying that, goes.
• 47:44
  Speaker 12: Okay, walk out because I love you too much, baby,
• 47:50
  So why can't you see what you're doing to me?
• 47:58
  Reggie dominy even where say we came down together with.
• 48:06
  Speaker 8: Suspicious minds, we can real our dreams with a vicious
• 48:15
  line do myver and no, no you want to try,
• 48:21
  We're lost in a cloud with too much rain.
• 48:26
  Speaker 12: We're trapped in the world that struggled with pain. And
• 48:31
  as long as a man has a stack to dream,
• 48:37
  he can redeem his soul.
• 48:40
  Speaker 2: Have fly go ahead, faces deep in my heart.
• 48:55
  Speaker 1: Trembling, we heard, but I am sure that the answer.
• 49:03
  Answer is gonna come somehow. Out there in the dog
• 49:09
  there's a bagunning candle.
• 49:12
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 49:13
  Speaker 12: And while I can't think, while I can talk, while
• 49:17
  I can stand, while I can walk, while.
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: I can't dream. So please let my dream come true.
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: Right now? He wrote that because they discontinued. You who
• 49:40
  just kidding as Martin Luther King died, probably shouldn't put
• 49:44
  that in their men the Bemles. So all okay?
• 50:00
  Speaker 4: Beatles Lost Cartoon episode, Oh I I don't think I've
• 50:06
  ever read this one.
• 50:06
  Speaker 2: I don't know when it came out, that's my understanding.
• 50:11
  Is it one of those like og ones? Is this
• 50:13
  an old one? Harry? I don't know how old it is.
• 50:17
  Speaker 3: But the Beatles Cartoon Lost episode does not feel like
• 50:22
  a like a classic creepypasita to me.
• 50:23
  Speaker 2: Well, there it was back when, like Dead Bart or
• 50:26
  like Squidward two.
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: Is that all seems fine? Because that's like new Ray
• 50:29
  like dead Squidward.
• 50:31
  Speaker 3: I'm like, at the time that's people were probably young
• 50:33
  and obsessed with it'd be like nowadays, it'd be like
• 50:38
  Creepypasa about like has been hotel or some shit.
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you know, I'm sure that's out there. Yeah,
• 50:46
  well we have to find it where, all right.
• 50:50
  Speaker 4: I just want to start off by saying that if
• 50:52
  you want an answer at the end, prepared to be disappointed.
• 50:55
  Speaker 2: There is it.
• 50:56
  Speaker 4: One like to start this off by affirming that I
• 50:58
  am a huge Beatles fan as well as being fourteen
• 51:01
  years old.
• 51:02
  Speaker 2: But you know, you rarely see that level of honesty.
• 51:05
  I love it.
• 51:06
  Speaker 3: I have to say there is a shocking amount of
• 51:10
  truth and all this. I just want to say I
• 51:13
  like the Beatles, like ninety percent of the world, also fourteen.
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: Also, I have no idea what's going I have no idea.
• 51:21
  Speaker 3: It'll be disappointed by You're going by the end of this,
• 51:24
  you are going to be like that was not worth
• 51:25
  my time?
• 51:25
  Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, of course. I'm also an avid collector of
• 51:28
  Beatles stuff. I was even there at their first concert.
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: How old is this person?
• 51:33
  Speaker 4: I don't fourteen, so no, you weren't. They have great
• 51:37
  music and great talent. I have their albums, t shirts,
• 51:40
  and other assorted items. I haven't enjoyed the old cartoon
• 51:42
  of the Beatles that was made in the sixties, but
• 51:45
  it wasn't long before I found out there was a
• 51:47
  morbid secret to the cartoon. I was at a local
• 51:50
  collectors shop where they had a section about the Beatles.
• 51:54
  I was looking for some Beatles mugs and pins. Bought
• 51:57
  two Beatles mugs and four Beatles pins, and I was
• 52:00
  just about to leave the section something.
• 52:02
  Speaker 2: Caught my eye.
• 52:03
  Speaker 4: It was a videotape called the Lost Beatles Cartoon, or
• 52:07
  at least that's what I assumed, being what was scribbled
• 52:11
  on it with what appeared to be black sharpie. I
• 52:13
  really wanted to get it, so I told my desjoined
• 52:15
  mother that I wanted to buy it. When we went
• 52:18
  to purchase the tape, the counter workers said I couldn't
• 52:21
  have it. He told me that he's watched it and
• 52:23
  had nightmares. I was surprised he could say that about
• 52:26
  the tape because it was just the Beatles. How can
• 52:29
  a cartoon about a band possibly be that scary that.
• 52:32
  Speaker 1: He said, never mind, you're just gonna have nightmares anyway.
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: And gave me the tape. What never mind, it's too late.
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: Take it, gives a shit, Just take a kid, You're fun.
• 52:47
  I like the Beatles.
• 52:51
  Speaker 2: Cool.
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: Look at these pins?
• 52:53
  Speaker 2: I got yeah, take it well.
• 52:58
  Speaker 4: I was walking away, I thought I saw him folding
• 53:01
  his hands like he was praying. For some odd reason,
• 53:03
  I was starting to feel like something was wrong with
• 53:05
  the tape.
• 53:07
  Speaker 2: Really.
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: When I got home, I immediately went downstairs to watch
• 53:10
  this mysterious video tape started to play.
• 53:13
  Speaker 2: Something weird happened in the beginning. Do we try to do?
• 53:18
  Is there photorealistic blood in the story? Does you want
• 53:22
  to do a little bingo card?
• 53:23
  Speaker 4: Yes?
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: Blood the realistic eye, hyper realistic guye? Okay, sorry, are
• 53:28
  we calling that?
• 53:29
  Speaker 2: I think I'll call those I think? And does one
• 53:32
  of the Beatles? Or do they all kill themselves? Are
• 53:34
  gonna be dead? Are they already dead?
• 53:36
  Speaker 1: Or do you think is Paul gonna shoot John?
• 53:38
  Speaker 4: It's gonna start as a normal one, but then they're
• 53:39
  gonna be like it's gonna catch their eyes like black
• 53:42
  or ripped out, and then they're gonna be there's gonna
• 53:44
  sound screaming, like they're all screaming and they're dead. Yeah,
• 53:48
  and John will be like I don't feel good or
• 53:50
  something like that. Yeah, definitely a seem like that, some
• 53:55
  loud noise effect something like that. It was the sounds
• 53:59
  of some one's screaming in complete agony. All right, well
• 54:02
  immediately there you go.
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: That's another point for me, which while that was normal
• 54:07
  for the Beatles cartoon, why was that normal for the
• 54:11
  Beatles cartoon?
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: People usually screaming anguish at the Beatles cartoon.
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: This is a this is a this is an actual cartoon, right,
• 54:19
  I don't know. Okay, hold on what happened? Okay, here's
• 54:23
  how the intro starts. No one's screaming, We're.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: Not INDI yet. Okay, that's anguish.
• 54:41
  Speaker 10: Okay, that's that's kinda go to talk about.
• 54:43
  Speaker 2: That's kind of a creepy intro a little bit.
• 54:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, I see, I see, all right, I'm
• 54:50
  tracking sounds of someone screaming complete agony, which, while that
• 54:53
  was normal for the Beatles cartoon, there's usually a title
• 54:56
  card accompanying it. I was scared until the title card
• 54:59
  thankfully faded in a few seconds later. The episode was
• 55:02
  called because and assumed it was referring to the Abbey
• 55:06
  Road song because first scene faded in from black, but
• 55:09
  something was off. It was slightly different than the original style.
• 55:14
  It looked almost similar to the original, but looked darker,
• 55:17
  more detailed. Then the episode showed all four Beatles and
• 55:21
  their trademark grotesque original designs, John, Paul, George and Ringo.
• 55:27
  Despite the past oddity, I relaxed hearing the trademark Paul
• 55:30
  Freeze and Lance Percival voicing the Fab four. They were
• 55:34
  talking about some kind of a CD they found outside
• 55:37
  the recording studio and about listening to it. This was
• 55:40
  strange if CDs weren't invented until nineteen seventy six, show
• 55:43
  was produced in the late sixties, So then the scene
• 55:46
  suddenly transitioned to the Beatles in their recording studio. Shot
• 55:50
  showed John casually putting the headphones on until the thing happened. John,
• 55:54
  all of a sudden, just looked like he just blacked out.
• 55:57
  Speaker 2: Then Paul Wordley asked. Then the screen zoomed up to John,
• 56:05
  who had started drooling.
• 56:07
  Speaker 4: All of a sudden, John's eyes turned into what I
• 56:09
  can only really describe to my limited vocabulary as LSD
• 56:14
  acid trip image weird colors. After ten seconds of John's
• 56:19
  acid tripping face, something appeared. I grabbed the clicker and
• 56:23
  went backwards to see what it was. What I saw
• 56:26
  was a morbid, ro tesque picture. It was a real
• 56:29
  photo of a man with a ventriloquist dummy. The scary
• 56:32
  part of the picture was that the man with the
• 56:34
  dummy had no mouth. Instead, there was blood on his
• 56:38
  face where his mouth was supposed to be. The dummy
• 56:41
  had fire in his eyes and an insane smile. I
• 56:44
  had to choke back some vomit after watching it.
• 56:49
  Speaker 2: It's just kind of funny.
• 56:50
  Speaker 4: They always do that way, like you remember Squidwards suicide
• 56:54
  where they keep throwing over it.
• 56:57
  Speaker 1: Like I had to throw uppo some grossed out.
• 57:01
  Speaker 2: But all they described was.
• 57:04
  Speaker 4: There's a man with no mouth, the ventriloquist done with
• 57:07
  a ventriloquist. His eyes are on fire, he's like, and
• 57:16
  an insane smile. Don't forget the insane smile.
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: Of course. Then the scream went back to an equally
• 57:21
  as vomit inducing sight John's face. Oh you asked, Ringo.
• 57:28
  Speaker 11: Sings, not believing Shane is killing.
• 57:33
  Speaker 4: John said in dull, a dull monotone, as though he
• 57:37
  was in some sort of trance. John soon snapped back
• 57:40
  to reality. Hope that I was grabbing you, shaking his
• 57:43
  head and replied.
• 57:44
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, I am. What time is it, Jones? Which
• 57:49
  one the change?
• 57:51
  Speaker 4: George answered nonchalantly. Then the screen went black and blood
• 57:54
  started to rain down. But this blood looked much more
• 57:57
  realistic danging than anything else that I had seen in
• 58:01
  any other episode. It looks so real that if I
• 58:05
  touched the screen I would somehow get blood on my fingers.
• 58:08
  The blood rain soon disappeared in another scene, Soon faded in,
• 58:12
  showing the Beatles walking to a lake. Out of girls
• 58:15
  soon started chasing the guys for almost a minute, when
• 58:18
  all of a sudden, a picture of a girl with
• 58:19
  no eyes dan janlay Yep with no eyes appeared on
• 58:23
  the screen. It was an actual black and white picture
• 58:26
  of a person with just her eye sockets stripping with blood.
• 58:30
  She had no teeth, and more blood was pouring out
• 58:32
  of the mouth. I jumped back on my couch after
• 58:35
  seeing it. Then the screen went to John's face and
• 58:39
  all of a sudden, screaming of the fans stopped, and
• 58:42
  when all four of them turned around to check, all
• 58:44
  of the fans were on the ground burning to.
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: A crisp Paul clearly petrified asked, what would happened? So wait,
• 58:52
  hold on.
• 58:53
  Speaker 4: The screen cuts back and everyone's dead burning ye scene
• 59:00
  showed Ringo vomiting out red vomit with chunks of brown meat.
• 59:04
  Something caught my eye. I paused and looked closely at
• 59:07
  the vomit and there was the face of Hitler.
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: Jarvis free Jarvis pause enhanced mine Fura in the voment,
• 59:33
  not in the vomit. Wait pause that rewind enhance.
• 59:44
  Speaker 2: Enhance. Oh my god.
• 59:54
  Speaker 4: I was somewhat shocked that a man who killed millions
• 59:58
  of people and soldiers I was in a cartoon about
• 1:00:01
  the Beatle.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: Oh god, it's like he spoke a rappersent around this week,
• 1:00:07
  Like why would they make this.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 2: Or they giving that guy free press? Like Hitler was
• 1:00:16
  the Nazi stuff.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 1: I never do that.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 2: That's weird. Headed in the bomb the whole time. Just
• 1:00:23
  forget about it. John Sharpley's shouted back.
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 1: But what about event, Oh, don't give a fuck.
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 2: The sensitive in the story because they're fourteen and their
• 1:00:39
  mom would get mad.
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: Time to know, it's it's f star star K. Mommy
• 1:00:44
  can't get mad, it's f star star K dude.
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 4: The next I was shocked at this episode involves John
• 1:00:51
  saying the word, but I decided to continue on. The
• 1:00:58
  next scene showed a building that was about to be demolished.
• 1:01:01
  The Beatles were walking down the sho Jim.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: I thought I was going to go do the twin
• 1:01:05
  towers right there. I looked, was like, there's no.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: Way, Okay, I would dude, We'll see, We'll see Hitler
• 1:01:11
  has been thrown Hitler and CDs brought in.
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: I thought that was the first thing.
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 3: It's like it goes from like, let's where the compad
• 1:01:19
  disc was made till seventy six, and it's like Hitler.
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: In the ball.
• 1:01:25
  Speaker 4: The next scene showed a building that was about to
• 1:01:27
  be demolished. Beatles were walking down the street when the
• 1:01:29
  wrecking ball hit the When a wrecking ball hit the building,
• 1:01:33
  piece of rubble went flying in the air. It was
• 1:01:35
  about to miss a person when John did something despicable
• 1:01:39
  in typical John fashion. God he proceeded to push the
• 1:01:43
  man back to where the piece of rubble was about
• 1:01:46
  to fall. In typical John fashion, he killed somebody.
• 1:01:50
  Speaker 2: Classic John.
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 4: In a second, the piece of solid marble crushed the
• 1:01:55
  guy to death. Blood and brain matter flew everywhere, even
• 1:01:59
  though the brain matter and blood still looked cartoonish.
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: It was still pretty horrible.
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 1: Though it was drawn. I was still kind of freaked out.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 2: I was still really scared by all this.
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 4: A crowd of people quickly surrounded the scene, and the
• 1:02:14
  scene zoomed up to John with an evil smirk on
• 1:02:17
  his face. The next scene only showed just a black screen.
• 1:02:21
  Only thing that could be heard was a gun shot.
• 1:02:23
  Then there was smoke that I assume represented the fire gun.
• 1:02:27
  Then the screen faded into a shot of the recording studio.
• 1:02:31
  The studio had no lights on, causing the screen to
• 1:02:34
  be too dark to make anything out. But there was
• 1:02:37
  quiet mumbling, and I listened closely to hear someone dully whispering.
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 2: Oh, shouldn't have done that. The Gordon didn't know.
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 4: Then one light went on. There was a shadow outside
• 1:02:49
  the door. It was the form of John. It wasn't
• 1:02:52
  long until the light was reflecting to the sound manager
• 1:02:55
  in the recording booth dead. I quickly put two and
• 1:02:59
  two together and figure that the man was shot by John,
• 1:03:02
  who had to really who had a gun for whatever reason.
• 1:03:06
  The camera zoomed up to the ground outside the room.
• 1:03:09
  A Model eighteen eighty seven fell to the ground fell
• 1:03:12
  to the ground with blood splattered on it and with
• 1:03:15
  bits of smoke still coming out of the barrel. The
• 1:03:18
  next scene suddenly showed Paul, George, and Ringo knocking on
• 1:03:23
  John's room door. Then Ringo proceeded to bust down the
• 1:03:26
  door with his trademark Strong Sexy Insect.
• 1:03:30
  Speaker 2: When am I reading?
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 4: Ringo proceeded to bust down the door with his trademark
• 1:03:35
  Strong Sexy Insect flags And there was a humongous.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 2: Safe that was the size of the suv. What am
• 1:03:42
  I reading? There's no boarded. I'm kind of just like,
• 1:03:54
  please make it stop.
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 4: They didn't know what the combination was, but for some
• 1:03:59
  reason it wasn't locked up all the way. They opened
• 1:04:02
  it up and they found out John's secret. He was
• 1:04:05
  a Satanist. There was a dead body of a woman
• 1:04:14
  on a pinagram drawn in her blood, and her with
• 1:04:17
  her eyes gorged out. There were dead animals, a fan
• 1:04:21
  made necronomicon and goat skull on a pinagram.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: That is fucking scary.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: I'm so scared.
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 3: Aw, that is fucking freaky man, not the Beatles, not John.
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 4: In fear, George fell to the ground. Paul had to
• 1:04:43
  choke back a vomit. Ringo ran over to the corpse
• 1:04:47
  and yelled.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 1: Out, kiddy, mafiance.
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: No.
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 4: He then slumped to the ground, closing his eyes. Then
• 1:04:58
  Ringo started crying in.
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: A sad away crying. He looked more.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 4: Crying from Ringo didn't sound like normal cartoon crying. It
• 1:05:17
  sounded as real as day and in shock, I found
• 1:05:22
  out that the dead woman was Rigo's fiance, Jenny.
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 2: What was his first clue?
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I did he scream out, scream who's that woman?
• 1:05:31
  Who could that be a stranger?
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 4: I didn't know that Ringo had a fiance, but I
• 1:05:36
  decided to continue on. Suddenly, some distorted screams of a
• 1:05:40
  girl started to play in the background. I started to
• 1:05:43
  suspect that's supposed to be the screams of Jenny. Scream
• 1:05:46
  went black. Then the screen showed the view of the
• 1:05:49
  sun setting from John's legs. Screen immediately went to John's
• 1:05:52
  face that he had a mad expression and rapid moving mouth.
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 2: He had red in his left iris. His dick looked
• 1:06:00
  like whoa.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 4: His dick looked like it was ripped by a rabid raccoon.
• 1:06:08
  He had a noose around his neck. He was about
• 1:06:11
  to commit suicide. He shut his eyes and jumped hold on,
• 1:06:15
  I just.
• 1:06:16
  Speaker 1: Want to say that this man was murdered in real life.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, this is a guy. This is the guy that
• 1:06:20
  got shot.
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 3: Yeah, this is a man who was actually murdered in
• 1:06:23
  real life in broad daylight. And like his dick was
• 1:06:27
  ripped off by a rabid raccoon and he hung himself. Yeah,
• 1:06:35
  he's a fucking Satanist. Like they're just like smirking this
• 1:06:40
  man's name. Yeah, wouldn't that be creepy? Will that be
• 1:06:44
  creepy if.
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 2: You just did that?
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 4: The camera showed John's feet still swinging. The camera zoomed
• 1:06:49
  out to show John's lifeless body hanging on the small
• 1:06:52
  cliff on the lake that the Beatles were going to.
• 1:06:54
  In the beginning of the episode, scream went black and
• 1:06:57
  Paul appeared in a sad expression. Then this screen went
• 1:07:00
  black again, and then the scary part begins. Without warning,
• 1:07:06
  Paul's face appeared with hyper realistic guys three for three guys.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: To the words yes, let's go. There was so many
• 1:07:19
  camera views of Paul's face, like a zoom out of
• 1:07:21
  him in the corner. Then pictures appeared.
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 4: I remember seeing a picture of a hand with a
• 1:07:26
  gun in it, and the gun was pointed to a
• 1:07:28
  little boy's head, but the gun was already fired. Another
• 1:07:32
  picture flashed on the screen of a garfish in the river.
• 1:07:35
  The next the next picture was a burnt just a
• 1:07:39
  little wildlife picture. In the middle of it, I'll get exploding.
• 1:07:44
  Were just like fish, very cold little scene. Next picture
• 1:07:49
  was a burnt town. People were on the ground dead.
• 1:07:52
  Quickly I discovered that the town was destroyed during an attack.
• 1:07:56
  It was destroyed because of the Vietnam War.
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 2: How did he discover that? In the is a picture?
• 1:08:01
  Speaker 4: The next picture was three undertakers with seven coffins with
• 1:08:04
  little children no younger than six, And behind the left
• 1:08:08
  undertaker was a coffin with a hand coming out of
• 1:08:10
  it and the hand was moving. After more pictures, it
• 1:08:14
  shows Paul with the same expression that he had before
• 1:08:16
  the scary slide show. Then suddenly I heard a loud,
• 1:08:19
  booming voice of a low, low, quiet voice saying due.
• 1:08:25
  Then a nineteen eleven Colt pistol appeared in Paul's hand.
• 1:08:28
  He puts it in his mouth and pulled the trigger.
• 1:08:31
  Realistic blood and brain matter went everywhere, like on the
• 1:08:34
  grass and the cliff.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 2: Then the camera zoomed up to the capsule of the
• 1:08:38
  bullet that shopped Paul, and the capsule said, your life
• 1:08:42
  was already over, Paul in a mysterious Russian accent. Yeah,
• 1:08:46
  you'll life was already over. Bull Wait the bullet says it.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 4: The camera zooms up, so it's written on there, but
• 1:08:54
  it's written in a Russian accent.
• 1:08:57
  Speaker 2: Where it's the bullet saying in a Russian their life
• 1:09:00
  was over.
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 1: That should be the backer or not? I should be
• 1:09:04
  the smile dog the backer.
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 3: I was just saying to be funny if the whole
• 1:09:06
  time it was a bullet capsule that had that already.
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 4: In the next scene showed George on a cliff from
• 1:09:12
  the same like John committed suicide.
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 2: He was about to commit suicide too. I thought he
• 1:09:18
  was going to jump off the cliff, but instead he
• 1:09:21
  pulled out a gun and shot himself. I'm surprised a
• 1:09:23
  lot of restraints to not say the specific model of gun,
• 1:09:26
  as he has done twice. Yeah, to say, I like
• 1:09:28
  how the specific gun is extremely important.
• 1:09:31
  Speaker 4: What what's funny about it is the way they ride
• 1:09:33
  it nineteen eleven and eighteen eighty seven is the same
• 1:09:36
  way those guns are written in Call of Duty?
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 2: Are they really yeah, No one says in nineteen eleven.
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 4: They just say nineteen eleven, unless you play cod Zombies,
• 1:09:45
  where it says in nineteen eleven.
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 2: It's military terms. You don't get it. I love black Ops.
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 3: I love black ops so much's my dad's a truck driver.
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 2: It feels pretty irrelevant. He doesn't talk to me that.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 4: But in said he pulled out a gun and shot himself.
• 1:10:13
  Very anti climactic.
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah boy, I'm born.
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 2: At the end of the scene, the camera zoomed into
• 1:10:21
  the gun and the gun was the same one Paul
• 1:10:22
  used to commit suicide. And on the side it said
• 1:10:25
  it takes two boards to kill two beetles. Hearing me
• 1:10:31
  a little, it sin chills down by spine. I mean,
• 1:10:37
  guns can't talk.
• 1:10:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, let's be real here, think about it.
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 2: Can't talk. Hitler Satan.
• 1:10:59
  Speaker 1: The vioment. All of a sudden, guns are speaking.
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 2: The way. It's freaking fucking I mean, guns, for fu.
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 3: Sakes, people with you, just take a second to think
• 1:11:16
  about this. This is creepy, fucking stuffy.
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 2: I challenge you think of one instance in your life.
• 1:11:24
  I think of one time you've ever talked to a gun.
• 1:11:28
  Speaker 1: It's probably no times.
• 1:11:33
  Speaker 4: The next scene showed Ringo in the hospital dying of
• 1:11:36
  an unknown disease.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 3: It gives Ringo cancer, a little kid being like and
• 1:11:44
  Rio has total aid cancer.
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 2: And his gun talks to him.
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: I mean thinking about that.
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 2: So now that the open, He's like, I'm fourteen. I
• 1:11:53
  think he aged himself up.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 2: The author's like ten or eleven.
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it definitely feels like this is
• 1:12:00
  like a twelve year old.
• 1:12:01
  Speaker 3: He's like, for sure, so trust me, I'm fourteen. Yeah,
• 1:12:04
  so you can respect what I have to say.
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 2: My teacher said, I'm in a fourteen year old reading. Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 4: He took the picture of him and his fiance and
• 1:12:13
  the engagement ring he gave her, and then he died.
• 1:12:18
  Then the scene faded while the Indian music played. After
• 1:12:21
  about a minute, another shot faded in. It appeared to
• 1:12:24
  be in a dark halt. Wait didn't didn't Ringo actually
• 1:12:28
  die of a disease? No, Ringo's soul life, which one died,
• 1:12:31
  which one got stabbed in his house? And then that
• 1:12:33
  had to be George, Then no one that died of cancer.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 3: George died of cancer. Yeah, and then John Lennon got shot. Yeah, Well,
• 1:12:40
  the whole thing when Ringo and George was like.
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 4: He was doing okay, but then someone broke into his
• 1:12:45
  house and stabbed him one night in the lung and
• 1:12:48
  it caused like super damaged lungs and then he died
• 1:12:50
  after So they think maybe if that didn't happen, he
• 1:12:52
  could have recovered the longer whatever. So I thought for
• 1:12:56
  a second he was saying that, like, and Ringo just
• 1:12:58
  died of cancer, like in real life.
• 1:13:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 4: Then the scene faded while the Indian music played. After
• 1:13:05
  about a minute, another shot faded in. It appeared to
• 1:13:08
  be in a dark hall. All here was screams, whistles, yelling,
• 1:13:12
  and gunshots. I soon found out that the hall was
• 1:13:15
  in a prison. The scary part was that every time
• 1:13:18
  the lamp swings in the hall, a black.
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 2: Wooded dragure appeared.
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 4: It wasn't long until I found out it was John
• 1:13:27
  with gray skin and red iris. For a brief second,
• 1:13:30
  I thought he resembled trademark web comic character carcat Vauntis.
• 1:13:36
  There's no way who trademark web comic character I am.
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: I am immediately looking up who carcat Vantis is.
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 2: By the way, this is like in that one story
• 1:13:47
  where it's like if you played Destiny, you would know.
• 1:13:52
  Hold on, are you fucking kidding me?
• 1:13:55
  Speaker 1: This is what carcats it's a homestick character. Carcass Vontas
• 1:14:04
  looks like this.
• 1:14:07
  Speaker 2: No, no, you know Homestuck.
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 4: No, that was a huge tumbler series where it's like
• 1:14:12
  everyone wrote their own characters in O. C's and like
• 1:14:15
  it was this big fan fiction where they talk to
• 1:14:18
  each other. That explains so much about what.
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 2: I'm reading right now. Cor cat vonts, huh dude, straight up,
• 1:14:29
  straight up, this is being written by like a homestuck person.
• 1:14:31
  Makes so much sense. And that's also the author's depiction
• 1:14:37
  of like the devil, Like that's what the grim Reaper
• 1:14:40
  looks like, big and scary.
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 4: He shouted, hope you joined off, because my life is over,
• 1:14:48
  including my friends all because of me, John.
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 2: Because of me, John Lennon of the Beatles and the
• 1:14:59
  infamous John Lennon of Beatles from Liverpool.
• 1:15:05
  Speaker 1: Imagine, yeah, all the caucus.
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 4: Right behind him, you know, you know are because I
• 1:15:14
  know those seven Sisters, like our audience. There's some some weird,
• 1:15:19
  some weird people out there, and I know a bunch
• 1:15:22
  of them were familiar with home stock when.
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 2: I said car cat fans feel like a sleeper cell
• 1:15:29
  at Yeah, exactly.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 3: They're gonna try They're gonna try to like kill somebody,
• 1:15:36
  I grab a gun.
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 2: Kill the surge of women murderers across the United States
• 1:15:44
  like click click click. Right behind him was a crowd
• 1:15:49
  of guards and prisoners.
• 1:15:51
  Speaker 4: It seems that some of them had bullet holes in
• 1:15:54
  their heads and blood all over their bodies. In the crowd,
• 1:15:57
  I could make out several people and grotesque beatles, cartoon designs.
• 1:16:02
  Speaker 2: John F. Kennedy, Abraham Lincoln, and Archduke France.
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: Literally everyone who has been assassinate.
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 2: Fransfer Day of Austria.
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 1: Literally literally everyone who has been shot.
• 1:16:16
  Speaker 4: By the way, what are the chances that Mark David
• 1:16:18
  Chapman comes up, I the guy that killed John Lennon.
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 2: What are the chances? It has to? It has to, right,
• 1:16:27
  it has to. The really weird part was that the
• 1:16:31
  prisoner that was right next to John was Mark your brain.
• 1:16:47
  Oh yes, I get three for three on the stereo. Okay,
• 1:16:50
  is this is this one of your stories that you
• 1:16:52
  wrote when you were younger? No?
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: No, okay, because that was a poll that was a
• 1:16:57
  bear trap and a half about well.
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 4: I mean, it's everyone getting assassinated and earlier when they
• 1:17:02
  were dying.
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 2: I'm like, he's the guy that shot John. Yeah, and
• 1:17:05
  he has to sure enough. Oh man.
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 4: The really weird part was the prisoner next to John
• 1:17:14
  was Mark David Chapman. It scared me how the guy
• 1:17:17
  who killed the actual John Lennon was right behind the
• 1:17:20
  evil cartoon John. For thirty seconds, Mark David Chapman and
• 1:17:25
  the crowd of prisoners and guards started walking straight like
• 1:17:28
  if they were walking towards me. The more they kept walking,
• 1:17:32
  the more blood they seemed to god on themselves. Then
• 1:17:42
  the episode finally ended. I went backwards and kept rewinding
• 1:17:46
  the opening credits to believe how stupid I was to
• 1:17:49
  believe there could ever be a nice episode of The
• 1:17:52
  Beatles Cartoon. It wasn't long until something caught my eye.
• 1:17:57
  I looked closely at the bottom of the word because
• 1:18:00
  and I paused to see that the episode was actually
• 1:18:04
  called the Beatles Cartoon because of John their dad.
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 2: I was about to take the tape out until the
• 1:18:19
  VCR caught on fire. Oh imagine. I immediately got my
• 1:18:34
  grieving mom And why was mom grief? Well, so I
• 1:18:37
  don't know.
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: Remember earlier he said, like I convinced my like disheveled mom.
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 2: Yeah that like his dad, Just I don't know. I
• 1:18:49
  got my grieving mom and a fire extinguisher. We put
• 1:18:52
  out the fire and discovered that somehow the VCR was
• 1:18:57
  still okay because we put in more tapes in and
• 1:18:59
  they managed worked. But the only thing that was.
• 1:19:03
  Speaker 4: Destroyed from the fire was the tape. And it was
• 1:19:07
  the tape that started the fire.
• 1:19:12
  Speaker 2: Why why do you need the fix the art of work?
• 1:19:14
  Why write that at all? My disappointed mother and I
• 1:19:18
  went back to the collector.
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 1: What's with his mom?
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 2: And just gone through? Lord God, maybe maybe the author
• 1:19:29
  is just so used to a disappointed mother. Doesn't know
• 1:19:32
  how else a rider You're going to be disappointed.
• 1:19:38
  Speaker 4: Disappointed mother and I went back to the collector's shop
• 1:19:41
  and brought the tape back. The counter worker for the
• 1:19:44
  store asked what.
• 1:19:45
  Speaker 1: Happened to the tape? He was shot on fire when
• 1:19:48
  the tape ended.
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 2: He roughly grabbed the tape out of my little hands
• 1:19:51
  and finally chucked it in the trash. beIN. All I
• 1:19:54
  can why, All I can say is goodbye and see
• 1:19:59
  you later. This was golden, This was awesome. This had
• 1:20:09
  This is exactly what I want, what I wanted from
• 1:20:12
  every episode. They made a graphic.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 4: They made a graphic for the episode, but the words
• 1:20:22
  of John their dad, are just as large as because
• 1:20:27
  implying that he didn't even look at anything.
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I I love.
• 1:20:37
  Speaker 3: The innocence of like children writing something they perceived to
• 1:20:41
  be super scary. There's something so oddly wholesome and funny
• 1:20:45
  about just like it's every benchmark of like what's evil Hitler,
• 1:20:51
  Satanist assassination, It's all there. And they even had the
• 1:20:55
  photo realistic eyes. I mean, come on, come on, that's
• 1:20:59
  all timer.
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 1: It has to be in the greats, that is in
• 1:21:03
  the grades.
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 4: I don't know, I didn't hear about that one because
• 1:21:06
  that one doesn't get talked about in any.
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 2: Regard compared to like Sonic.
• 1:21:09
  Speaker 1: Do you think just oversaturation.
• 1:21:12
  Speaker 2: Later?
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 1: And also it's probably because it's the fucking Beatles. If
• 1:21:16
  this one came out in the sixties, maybe.
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 4: Up Front Suicide was like the one that didn't like
• 1:21:20
  Mickey Mouse dot Abi because.
• 1:21:22
  Speaker 2: Yeah, what's just the name.
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you have all the classic I know that character.
• 1:21:25
  I like it.
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, the Beatles. Carter do you think.
• 1:21:27
  Speaker 3: Kids give a fuck about the Beatles and kids? Yeah right, yeah,
• 1:21:32
  I know that story came out like a month ago,
• 1:21:34
  like the Beatles Hitler, all right, we got one more
• 1:21:39
  up here twelve years ago. This is another old This
• 1:21:43
  has to be a Golden era classic. It's called does
• 1:21:46
  anyone know a good plumber?
• 1:21:47
  Speaker 2: I did one?
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 1: I did one of those stupid rituals, and now my
• 1:21:50
  showers leaking and there's a faceless guy in my kitchen.
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 2: I've never heard of this one before.
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 1: Okay, I just want to say that is a that
• 1:21:57
  is a lengthy, lengthy title.
• 1:22:00
  Speaker 2: The top comment is cringe.
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 3: I just want to repeat the name. Does anyone know
• 1:22:07
  a good plumber? I did one of those stupid rituals.
• 1:22:10
  Now my shower's leaking, and there's a faceless guy in
• 1:22:12
  my kitchen? Do you think that you're supposed to say
• 1:22:14
  that with like the Jim Helper like.
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, yeah, hit us with the Jim Helper read.
• 1:22:22
  Speaker 1: Does anyone know a good plumber? I did one of
• 1:22:24
  those stupid rituals.
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 2: Now my shower's leaking.
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 1: Man, there's a face to sky in my kitchen.
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 2: You're supposed to absolute.
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 4: All right, does anyone know a good plumber. I screwed
• 1:22:36
  up one of those stupid ritual things that everyone's doing,
• 1:22:38
  and now my shower is leaking, and also there's some
• 1:22:41
  faceless sky in my kitchen. My landlord comes tomorrow and
• 1:22:44
  he's going to kill me, especially because I also have
• 1:22:48
  a cat and I'm not even supposed to have pets.
• 1:22:51
  It all started when I was drunk messaging a girl
• 1:22:53
  on tender and she said that the only way we
• 1:22:56
  would meet up is if I did this weird ritual
• 1:22:58
  thing where I summon a goos or some shit.
• 1:23:01
  Speaker 2: I think she called it may kolpa or something. Actually,
• 1:23:07
  her exact message was.
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 5: This, akay fleshold ut rest. I am the Alpha and
• 1:23:11
  the Omega. I have seen the perduct series cuts on
• 1:23:14
  the Earth. I was also be with Darkness Spiros Mihaka
• 1:23:21
  miak Paria.
• 1:23:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, she was a weird chick, at least I think
• 1:23:29
  she was a girl. I couldn't really see her face.
• 1:23:33
  Her picture was just a black background with two shiny
• 1:23:35
  dots that kind of looked like eyeballs. You could sort
• 1:23:39
  of see some features, but it looked like her face
• 1:23:42
  was gray, and I couldn't really see her mouth.
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 2: But she had really good skin. I wasn't about to
• 1:23:47
  rally for a pizza face.
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 3: I just want to say, this deal of a millennial
• 1:23:51
  cringe lord trying to get some pussy, is it took
• 1:23:54
  me already?
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 1: This guy's kind of my hero all right now. Honestly
• 1:23:58
  didn't really go fuck her face life because.
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 2: She had clear, clear skin, and I like that a lot. Yeah,
• 1:24:04
  do you relate to this a millennial cringe lord trying
• 1:24:06
  to get laid? Is that you?
• 1:24:08
  Speaker 1: Those kind of probably me back in the day, I
• 1:24:10
  wo'd assume. So why more of a boomer cringe lord?
• 1:24:12
  Speaker 2: What generation are you? You're now? You're millennial? You're millennials?
• 1:24:17
  Speaker 1: Are you from the beginning of X?
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 4: No?
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 2: You have to be the end because like my mom's
• 1:24:22
  gen X. How was your mom fifty nine? Okay, I
• 1:24:27
  mean I forty three, So you're not forty three. I
• 1:24:31
  don't know what you are, but if you tell me
• 1:24:33
  a number, it's not that number, all right. So anyway,
• 1:24:37
  I weighed the pros and cons of spooky rituals versus
• 1:24:40
  trampoline booty as best I could on five shots a
• 1:24:43
  patron This.
• 1:24:44
  Speaker 3: Guy, I mean, I'm an all star, So I weighed
• 1:24:49
  the pros and cons of spooky rituals versus trampoline.
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 2: Booty as best as I could on five.
• 1:24:56
  Speaker 1: Shots of Patron? Is this guy my fucking spirit animal?
• 1:24:59
  Speaker 2: Why did you?
• 1:25:00
  Speaker 1: I'm kind of fucking wish I did what what is trample?
• 1:25:03
  Speaker 2: And then hit him with the hit him with the
• 1:25:05
  next line here.
• 1:25:06
  Speaker 4: It was totally worth it, my boys clappings trampling?
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 2: Does that mean you can bounce on it? Is that?
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 3: Yeah?
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 2: Okay?
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 4: I see I set my cell phone to three twenty
• 1:25:17
  six a m. But since my phone is a two
• 1:25:19
  thousand and five Motorola razor.
• 1:25:22
  Speaker 1: Okay, can this can this guy?
• 1:25:25
  Speaker 2: This might be the coolest fucking guy.
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 1: He's rocking a.
• 1:25:29
  Speaker 3: Two thousand and five motorolraser and he's getting some pussy
• 1:25:32
  on the side.
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 2: Are you kidding?
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 1: And he's like fucking five shots of Patrone? This guy rules?
• 1:25:38
  Holy shit, that's awesome.
• 1:25:42
  Speaker 2: I I got this story up with me like I
• 1:25:44
  should just gar me dog pitching muff winds and now
• 1:25:47
  it's it's ending for you.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this is I'm so stoked.
• 1:25:52
  Speaker 2: But since my phone's no.
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 4: Five Motorola razor that was dropped in the toilet several times.
• 1:25:57
  It went off at four am fuck, I decided to
• 1:26:02
  go through with the ritual anyway. I was also supposed
• 1:26:06
  to have a friend during this thing, but my bestie
• 1:26:08
  recently got incarcerated for selling heroin. On the corner of
• 1:26:11
  Patterson Park in Eastern Avenue, shout out to my main
• 1:26:15
  man Roscoe.
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 2: I'm not I'm not even joke. No, no, this guy
• 1:26:21
  fucking rules. This guy like that.
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 3: I would I would get fucked up with this guy
• 1:26:27
  so quick. The corner of Patterson Park at Eastern Abage.
• 1:26:31
  That is some real ship, dude, that's sick. I'm glad
• 1:26:37
  this is such a this awesome home run for you.
• 1:26:40
  Speaker 4: I set up and turned off my alarm, but the
• 1:26:42
  moment I turned it off, I drunkenly passed out again.
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 2: Woke up twenty.
• 1:26:46
  Speaker 4: Minutes later and actually got out of bed, this time
• 1:26:49
  stumbling around the room in the dark because apparently you're
• 1:26:53
  not supposed to turn on the lights because if you do,
• 1:26:55
  a ghost will pop out. I was supposed to Oh,
• 1:27:00
  it sounds like he's playing the Midnight Game or like
• 1:27:03
  something similar, like you like the Caah.
• 1:27:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I forgot about that.
• 1:27:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, set the alarm before.
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 4: I was supposed to find a candle and lighted, but
• 1:27:11
  my hangover just made me trip over one of the
• 1:27:14
  several candles I placed on my floor.
• 1:27:16
  Speaker 2: Eventually, I gave up and flipped the lights on, grabbing
• 1:27:20
  a candle from my desk.
• 1:27:22
  Speaker 3: Completely com completely disregard what you said earlier in this paragraph,
• 1:27:28
  like he's like, fuck it, lights and grabs the candle.
• 1:27:33
  He's awesome, dude, This kind of ru This would be
• 1:27:36
  also getting getting drunk on Patron the night you're trying
• 1:27:39
  to get some ghost pussy is insane.
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 4: I feel like, in an alternate world where we didn't
• 1:27:43
  do YouTube, if we still met, like I'd try to
• 1:27:46
  convince you to do like some creepy ritual thing and this.
• 1:27:49
  Speaker 2: Would be this would probably be it. Yeah.
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 4: I squinted out my window to see that my ghetto
• 1:27:55
  Baltimore neighborhood looked like at four twenty am. The street
• 1:28:00
  was empty except for some random wearing a black robe
• 1:28:03
  and a giant, pointy black hat. He was staring up
• 1:28:07
  at me through the window. I couldn't really see his face.
• 1:28:11
  You know, Baltimore has gone to the dogs. First, Gang Wars,
• 1:28:15
  now an updated KKK.
• 1:28:17
  Speaker 2: For God's sake, he has gone to the fucking dog.
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 1: He's such a clutch line.
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 4: He seems like the devil in like a clansman's robe,
• 1:28:30
  and he's like, what will they think of next?
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: Goddamn, the birds have gone to the dogs.
• 1:28:35
  Speaker 2: I let the candle and looked at my phone.
• 1:28:38
  Speaker 4: I was supposed to knock on my bedroom door sixty
• 1:28:40
  six times, the sixty sixth knock timed on the four
• 1:28:45
  o six, but since I had screwed everything coults up,
• 1:28:49
  I just did a shaven haircut knock and then walked
• 1:28:52
  into my hallway. What's a shaven a haircut knock?
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 2: You don't fucking know.
• 1:28:57
  Speaker 1: I bet you anything there is that's not even a reference.
• 1:29:00
  Speaker 2: Anything just came, I said, just be like, yeah, that's
• 1:29:02
  why I call it aircut.
• 1:29:05
  Speaker 4: So I was like, huh, He's like anyways, my bedroom
• 1:29:07
  door is opposite the stairs, and looking down the dark
• 1:29:10
  stairwell was pretty spooky.
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 2: I thought I saw something move on one of the
• 1:29:14
  lower steps. For the next step, I was supposed to
• 1:29:17
  close my eyes and walk forward.
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 3: While chanting mea culpa, Mia colpa, mia culpa.
• 1:29:22
  Speaker 4: Which is Italian for my coulpa, which is probably some
• 1:29:26
  kind of shitty Italian car. Try to close my eyes
• 1:29:30
  and walk forward while talking about Italian cars, but my cat,
• 1:29:33
  fish Sticks, ran under my feet and I ended up
• 1:29:36
  tripping over him and falling down the flight of stairs.
• 1:29:40
  Speaker 3: He tripped over his cats, whose name is fish Sticks.
• 1:29:43
  He just rolled also to completely unfazed. He's like, I
• 1:29:46
  think I'll see something moving down there, Mia culpa.
• 1:29:56
  Speaker 4: At some point, the stupid candle went out as I
• 1:29:59
  flailed down the stairs, but I was too concussic care
• 1:30:05
  I rolled up from the ground groaning and decided that
• 1:30:09
  I would just continue to go through the motions, which
• 1:30:13
  meant hiding in a closet and waiting for the ghost
• 1:30:15
  to play hide and seek with me. I chose the
• 1:30:18
  kitchen pantry because I had some open potato chips in there,
• 1:30:21
  so I made my way back. As I stumbled, I
• 1:30:24
  heard several soft whispers behind me. I spun around, hoping
• 1:30:28
  that I was right about fish Sticks knowing how to talk,
• 1:30:30
  but there was no one there except for the figure
• 1:30:37
  standing in the door. I stopped, blinked, and it was gone.
• 1:30:41
  I really needed to lay off the patron. As I
• 1:30:44
  honed in on the closet, the alcohol and concussion finally
• 1:30:48
  caught up with me, and I stumbled to a stop,
• 1:30:50
  doubling over and vomiting watery patron.
• 1:30:53
  Speaker 2: All over the kitchen floor. Back my ass was landlord grass.
• 1:30:58
  The hellish combination of our alcohol, concussion, post vomit, and
• 1:31:02
  illumine eviction notice caused my emotions to go haywire, and
• 1:31:06
  I unleashed a violent sob, mucus and tears riveting down
• 1:31:09
  my face. I heard a noise outside the kitchen.
• 1:31:13
  Speaker 4: My eyes fell on the kitchen window, and I spied
• 1:31:16
  that stupid gang member slash KKK dude in my backyard.
• 1:31:20
  Speaker 2: Still staring at me.
• 1:31:22
  Speaker 4: I must have looked like an idiot weeping in front
• 1:31:25
  of my kitchen pantry. Too ashamed to confront him, I
• 1:31:28
  just crawled into the pantry and shut the door. It
• 1:31:31
  was so cold in there it damn froze my man
• 1:31:34
  titties off. My air conditioner was probably broken. I definitely
• 1:31:38
  needed to call the landlord, but that would mean sedating
• 1:31:42
  fish sticks and stuffing him in a suitcase.
• 1:31:44
  Speaker 2: Under my bed.
• 1:31:46
  Speaker 4: At this point, I realized that I needed to reevaluate
• 1:31:49
  my life. Maybe I shouldn't drink as much. Maybe I
• 1:31:52
  should get fish sticks to a good home. Maybe I
• 1:31:54
  should find women with intellect and poise, maybe I should
• 1:31:58
  move out of my shit neighborhod where KKK people run
• 1:32:01
  around At four a m. After going through an entire
• 1:32:05
  existential crisis in my pantry, I decided to say through
• 1:32:08
  it and in the stupid ritual that tender girl wasn't
• 1:32:11
  even that hot anyway, And besides, I still had like
• 1:32:15
  seventy more ritual things to complete, which included lighting eight
• 1:32:18
  more candles, stabbing a Japanese doll, and spinning around in
• 1:32:21
  a circle while screaming you'ar it. This was all supposed
• 1:32:26
  to culminateing me going to my basement, setting in front
• 1:32:28
  of a mirror and looking into the mirror but not
• 1:32:30
  actually looking into it, which made absolutely no sense.
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 2: That's a different one. I can't remember which one. He's
• 1:32:38
  just doing all the once. As I got to open
• 1:32:41
  the pantry door, I heard a low moan coming from
• 1:32:43
  behind the door. I froze. I pray to God it
• 1:32:46
  wasn't my landlord.
• 1:32:48
  Speaker 4: Cracked open the door to see the gang member slash
• 1:32:50
  KKK guys standing in the kitchen staring at me. Finally
• 1:32:54
  got a good look at him. He definitely didn't have
• 1:32:56
  a face. Just checkless guys, no face for sure. I
• 1:33:02
  guess getting your face taken away is part of a
• 1:33:05
  gang ritual. Now he didn't react to my presence.
• 1:33:09
  Speaker 2: He just stared.
• 1:33:10
  Speaker 4: I didn't know how the hell to deal with gang
• 1:33:12
  members or faceless KKK members, so I just stare back.
• 1:33:16
  Speaker 2: We did this for about five.
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 4: Minutes before I slowly inched out of the kitchen and
• 1:33:19
  back upstairs. He turned to watch me as I went,
• 1:33:22
  but didn't move. So after that I went up to
• 1:33:26
  my bathroom to take a shower, and now my shower
• 1:33:28
  head is leaking, which I blame on the stupid ritual.
• 1:33:31
  So if you know any good plumbers in the Baltimore.
• 1:33:33
  Speaker 2: Area, I would really appreciate it. That was enjoyable. That
• 1:33:41
  was a fun one to end on the top comment
• 1:33:42
  that says Cringe has no.
• 1:33:44
  Speaker 1: Life, doesn't know excellence when he sees it.
• 1:33:49
  Speaker 2: For like a comedy creepypasta thing. I'll take that any
• 1:33:52
  day of the week. They actually so they posted a few.
• 1:33:55
  Speaker 4: So the author's name of that last one was Narrative
• 1:33:57
  of the Life, and they posted our slash. One of
• 1:34:00
  them is called does anyone know where to buy a
• 1:34:02
  Mermaid Frappuccino? So I imagining this is a recurring.
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's cool.
• 1:34:08
  Speaker 1: Good out of all these like little classics, what a
• 1:34:11
  fun what a fun day of read so.
• 1:34:14
  Speaker 2: Dream so like that last one was good. That last
• 1:34:16
  one was good. But the Beatles, Yeah that was that
• 1:34:19
  was an earnest like that.
• 1:34:21
  Speaker 3: I love a nice, youthful earnest like try of trying
• 1:34:24
  to scare somebody is beautiful all time, Very good, very good.
• 1:34:29
  Speaker 2: Loved it.
• 1:34:30
  Speaker 1: Uh, definitely the Beatles one is my favorite too.
• 1:34:32
  Speaker 3: Guys, thank you so much for listening on audio platforms
• 1:34:34
  right now like Spotify, Apple Podcast.
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 1: We appreciate you. Thanks for giving us a nice little
• 1:34:38
  rating there too. It does help us out. Thank you
• 1:34:40
  to over our beautiful patrons and consider buying some merch
• 1:34:44
  or don't.
• 1:34:44
  Speaker 2: Actually don't do it.
• 1:34:46
  Speaker 1: The links right there, driving to click it.
• 1:34:48
  Speaker 2: I don't want you to don't do it.
• 1:34:50
  Speaker 1: But until then we will see you next time by merch.
• 1:34:54
  Speaker 2: If Hunter left me in the airport,