Latest / What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie? / #198: Jakob's Wife (2021)

Transcript

#198: Jakob's Wife (2021) · What's Your (Least) Favorite Scary Movie?

0:06
Hello, What's your least favorite scary movie?
0:10
Sorry about the blasphemy. Welcome to What's Your least
0:13
favorite scary Movie? The podcast where we talk about
0:16
the good, the bad, the ugly and the absurd, and all of our
0:19
favorite and least favorite scary movies.
0:20
Because we believe every horror movie rifely has its fan base.
0:23
Even if we don't always get it. My name is Travis.
0:26
My name is Jesse and today we're kicking off March with a little
0:30
vampire dissolution of love story, Jacob's wife.
0:36
So we're really excited about this and I've been wanting to
0:38
cover it for a while. It was a joy to rewatch it last
0:41
night and I'm pretty excited to talk about it.
0:44
But first of all, we've got some very important announcements
0:47
beginning March. We have decided that we wanted
0:49
to lower the barrier for entry to our Patreon because we are
0:54
having fun with some of the stuff we're doing over there and
0:57
we want more bubbies to be able to come join it.
0:59
So our Frederick tier is still $1.00 and all of the perks still
1:02
remain the same. But our Bug Ted tier is now $3
1:05
and also includes a vote for the Patreon pick each month.
1:10
And the budget tier is now $6 and also includes a monthly
1:16
sticker mailed to your home featuring the cover art from our
1:20
monthly franchise coverage. So for example, on February
1:24
stickers have gone out for the Saw 3D art, and then this month
1:28
it will be the Jigsaw art. Cover art will be sent out.
1:32
So once again, the link to our Patreon is at the very bottom of
1:36
our show notes. Just scroll all the way down to
1:38
the bottom of whatever you're listening this on and you'll
1:41
find a link to our Patreon. Yeah, we're excited.
1:43
We look forward to maybe having some more of you guys come visit
1:46
and get some fun stuff there. I think that's all I have in
1:49
terms of announcements. Do you have poll results?
1:52
I have poll results. OK, OK, Travis named some of
1:55
them and some of them are from the wiki.
1:58
One of them I OK, actually, no, I did change the name for two.
2:01
OK, all right. So these are our poll results.
2:04
This is all based off of last week's movie, which was Saw 3D,
2:07
The Final Chapter. And as always, for all of our
2:09
Saw movies, we wanted to ask which trap you would survive.
2:13
Only can do four traps, because that's the limit for doing polls
2:18
online. Yeah, we don't.
2:19
We don't make the rules. Folks had to be selective with
2:21
them. So the four that we had are the
2:23
public breakup trap, which is from the very beginning
2:26
obviously. Yeah, and that one's actually
2:28
apparently officially called the public execution.
2:31
Yeah, I don't really like that one.
2:33
See, that's the change that I made because I just felt like I
2:35
needed adjusted because. They're breaking up with
2:37
Hardina. Exactly.
2:38
Yeah, it's it's a public breakup.
2:40
That's the whole point of it. Next one, the Chester Bennett
2:43
one, is the horsepower trap. Chester Bennington, Chester.
2:46
Bennington you. Would get his name correct.
2:49
I'll never get it. Right.
2:50
No, you know what we used to say that about Creedence Clearwater
2:52
Revival and look at you, I'm still.
2:54
Fucking that off. Yeah, but sometimes you get it
2:56
right. I.
2:56
Have to think really hard about it too.
2:58
Like I don't want to. Like any time I'm talking about
3:00
Linkin Park have to stop. And like you can see the clocks
3:03
turning in my head. Is it better to just call him
3:05
Lester Bennington and hope it's right?
3:08
I just call him Linkin Park. He represents the entire band.
3:12
I don't know any nobody. Does the other members of the
3:14
boy? Maybe they do.
3:16
I don't know. There's a lot of diehard Lincoln
3:17
Park fans. Up.
3:18
Anyway, it's the horsepower trap.
3:19
The horsepower trap. Yeah.
3:21
So that one, obviously. Okay Next up, the Silent Circle.
3:26
That is the official name for that one.
3:28
I like that name. I think that that's a really
3:29
cool. I liked my Silent Fish Hook
3:33
Jackass titling. I think that's a little bit more
3:35
fun. That one's pretty good, too.
3:37
And the tit chains one. The tit chains one.
3:40
'Cause they didn't actually have that one listed.
3:42
They had it listed as Bobby's trial, so it was all of his
3:46
shit. That just also sounds like the
3:48
name of the like original music composition for like, the
3:53
instrumental music that's playing in the background.
3:55
Bobby's Trial I. Thought you were going to say
3:57
the tit chains, I was like. You sure?
3:59
I mean, Charlie Klauser does do all of the zombies, so you.
4:04
Imagine, like going through the soundtrack, Okay, right?
4:07
The opening song and then tit chains.
4:14
Like CC Charles, what is what is this about the tit chains?
4:19
Do we need to play it with tit chains?
4:21
It was Chester requested it. We call it the tit chains.
4:24
He's not even in the scene, but he requested it.
4:26
All right, we gotta get going through.
4:27
So on Instagram, 38% would survive the public break up. 12%
4:33
would survive the horsepower trap. 38% the Silent Circle and
4:38
12% the tip chains won, so it's like tied for both of them today
4:45
over on Twitter, 50% the public breakup trap Nobody's making out
4:50
of the horsepower trap they 25. You know what?
4:53
Because on Twitter, nobody is like, they're like, hey, you've
4:56
curated the good corner of Twitter and there aren't racists
5:00
over here, so we're just not going to wind up in the.
5:02
Trap. Not implicating anybody on
5:05
Instagram, just just throwing that out there.
5:07
The Silent Circle, 25% and 25%. The tit chains one and then also
5:13
over on threads. Oh.
5:17
Boy. And it's 100% The Silent Circle.
5:20
OK, yeah. I don't remember what I said I
5:22
would beat last time. I think you know, I don't
5:27
fucking know what. You said.
5:28
Did we actually talk about? It we did because I said I would
5:31
do the public breakup one, which I could.
5:33
Still, I think I mostly just agreed with you that that's a
5:35
good plan for it. No, I think I recall you doing
5:38
part another part of Bobby's trial, which was the swinging on
5:43
over the spikes. Oh yeah, cuz I also played some
5:46
DK Country. Yeah, that's something.
5:48
Wrong. So yeah, that was our poll.
5:51
Public breakup seems to be the most winnable beatable trap.
5:55
OK. OK.
5:56
All right. So that's it.
5:57
People have spoken. Let's move on over to Jacob's
6:00
wife. All right.
6:02
All right. So what do you got for us?
6:03
All right. Well, Jacob's Wife premiered
6:06
March 17th, 2021 at South by Southwest Film Festival.
6:09
So happy Almost Birthday, Jacob's Wife.
6:11
It had a wide release. And by wide release, I mean
6:14
release to video on Demand on April 16th, 2021.
6:21
I'm assuming that's what I meant to write.
6:23
That's not what I wrote. We watched it on shutter because
6:26
that's where it's streaming. It's currently, it's a shutter
6:28
exclusive. If you have one of the other
6:31
apps that has the shutter, like add-ons, if you like AMC plus
6:34
premium, you know, with the shutter, yeah, then you can
6:38
watch it that way. But it's because you have the
6:41
shutter. OK.
6:42
This was written by Mark Steensberg, Kathy Charles, and
6:45
Travis Stevens. Directed by Travis Stevens,
6:48
music by Tara Bush, and special effects makeup by Marcus Cook
6:51
and Jesse Seats. Starring Barbara Crampton as Ann
6:55
Feder, Larry Fessenden as Jacob Feder, and Bonnie Aaron's as the
6:59
Master. All right, Travis, it's time for
7:02
our favorite game budget. Oh, I'm bud.
7:06
Ted. This feels like a bug Ted movie.
7:10
It doesn't feel like they had a whole lot of money.
7:13
That's, that's accurate. I don't actually have the
7:15
number. I didn't think you would.
7:17
Something told me about like just watching this, and I was
7:19
like, I don't think that there's a budget listed for this.
7:22
I did read an interview with Barbara Crampson and obviously
7:26
I'll go over that a little bit more where she said at one point
7:28
they were just trying to get just 20,000 more, so oh.
7:31
Really. OK, so then they were really
7:33
struggling. Yeah, opening box office if you
7:36
will, of 27.5000 and a worldwide gross of 47.7000 and an IMDb
7:42
score of 5.5 out of 10. I'm just going to say it now.
7:45
Rude. That's kind of surprising.
7:47
Yeah. I thought that would have been a
7:49
lot higher. I do have 3 movies from 2021 OK
7:53
and they all have themes or undertones relating to religion
7:58
or the occult. All right, I'm, I'm curious.
8:00
I thought it was going to be vampires, but.
8:03
Well, I don't know how many vampire movies were released in
8:06
2021, so I broadened it a little bit.
8:08
That's. Probably the best.
8:10
So the first one is the unholy that was released April 2nd,
8:14
2021. Couldn't find a budget for it,
8:17
but it does have a worldwide gross of 30.8 million and an
8:20
IMDb score of 5.1 out of 10. Wow, I don't I even know what
8:26
that movie is. I've seen the poster.
8:29
I couldn't tell you anything about it.
8:30
I did read a brief synopsis of it because I was curious and
8:33
apparently a little girl is blind, but then she starts
8:36
getting visions from Mother Teresa.
8:38
What? So OK, I I don't know.
8:41
That's if IMTV is to be believed.
8:43
If dude, they could have cast the girl from Scream Queens
8:47
that's doing cooking shows because she's the same height as
8:49
Mother Teresa. It's so.
8:50
Perfect. It would have been perfect for
8:52
her. She's She was born for that
8:53
role, but now she's out there just making cooking videos.
8:55
Nerdy nummies. She's I'm happy for her.
8:59
She went down the right. Yeah, second movie.
9:03
Yeah. It's one you hated.
9:05
Oh, I did. What was it?
9:07
You can take a guess. 2021 I hated it.
9:10
Uh huh. You've talked recently about how
9:13
much you hated it. Halloween ends.
9:17
No, no, that was Kills that came out that year, which I loved.
9:22
Fuck. I talked about recently.
9:23
Yeah. On the show or on this?
9:26
Both. Fuck, OK?
9:29
You ranted about it before recording and then while
9:31
recording and then I think also a little bit after recording.
9:34
Seriously. Yes.
9:35
I don't know. Wrong turn.
9:38
Oh, oh, I fucking hate that, Yeah.
9:45
That released February 26th, 2021 That.
9:48
Was 21? Yep.
9:50
What the fuck man? Also don't have a budget for it
9:56
and has a worldwide gross of 4.8 million and unfortunately the
10:01
same IMDb score as Jacob's wife of 5.5 out of 10.
10:05
That one needs to go down. That one needs to be.
10:08
Look, OK, I'm sorry. I'll say this, and then we'll be
10:12
done with it. Maybe OK has its own movie, but
10:14
don't call that shit wrong turn. That's the part that pisses me
10:17
off. That's all I'm gonna say.
10:19
She's got really strong feelings about it.
10:21
You do too. I know.
10:22
We both do. OK and 3rd maybe?
10:25
OK, Hellbender. Yeah.
10:28
Yeah, yeah, was. That the one that was on the
10:31
last drive in. Yes.
10:32
OK, that was an interesting old movie.
10:34
Yeah, so that premiered at the Fantasia International Film
10:38
Festival on August 14th, 2021. I don't have a budget for this
10:42
either, 'cause I think the whole back story was like it was a
10:44
family filmed it all together. Yeah, yeah, they all made it
10:47
together, I think during COVID too.
10:49
And it did have a worldwide gross of 67.4000 and has an IMDb
10:55
score of 5.8 out of 10. OK.
10:57
So that's a pretty fun little movie.
11:00
I have 3 taglines. Wow, that's a lot for this.
11:03
Yes, and I know at least two of them were on posters, so I'm
11:05
with the poster that was on IMDb.
11:08
That's the main tagline, which is Who's Your master?
11:11
Who's your master? Faster.
11:14
Faster. Jacob's wife?
11:18
Who's your master? OK.
11:20
Some marriages are truly blessed.
11:25
OK. I I wouldn't say that.
11:31
And then she will prey on you. That one makes more sense.
11:36
A little bit, 'cause I feel like they're trying to like, tie it
11:39
back into the whole church thing.
11:41
But that would be pray for you, pray over you, pray with you.
11:47
That would be good In reference to the master.
11:49
She will pray with you. See, I thought that that was
11:52
talking about the master. She will pray on you.
11:54
Yeah, so not my favorite. No, those are kind of lackluster
11:59
tag lines, and I feel like this movie could have had a lot of
12:02
fun with it. Yes, absolutely.
12:04
Okay. So I couldn't find a ton in the
12:06
way of fun facts, even, You know, I my last resort of
12:11
checking the IMDb trivia wasn't really like trivia was like,
12:14
there are 18 people in the cast of this film.
12:17
Whoa. Barbara Crampton's a producer.
12:20
I'm having some fun hearing this shit.
12:22
These are some fun facts. However, I did find an interview
12:25
with Barbara Crampton on rogereverett.com that talked
12:28
some about this, but also a lot about like indie film making and
12:32
how she feels looking back on some of her stuff from the 80s.
12:36
So OK, let's see. This screenplay actually won an
12:39
award at Shriekfest and she read it around that time and was
12:44
really invested in it. She said that she kind of really
12:46
connected with the role of Anne and likened her renewed love and
12:52
lust for life that is awakened by being bit to how Barbara
12:58
Crampton herself felt after she stopped acting for a good long
13:01
while, took a break, got married, just focused on other
13:04
things in her life and then she kind of got back into it with
13:07
your next. Really.
13:09
Was that when she came back? Yeah.
13:11
I never. I thought that she never had a
13:13
break. I thought she was acting
13:14
consistently all throughout. Yeah, no, she took.
13:16
She took a little bit of a break, so and she just kind of
13:20
really fell in love with it again and realized that it was
13:23
something that made her truly happy.
13:25
That's good. I'm glad.
13:26
And she had a hell of a comeback, too.
13:28
She really did. And just from the way she
13:30
looked, she didn't even miss any time.
13:33
Right. She looked exactly the same.
13:35
Well and I remember your next was actually my introduction to
13:37
Barbara Crampton. Seriously.
13:38
Yeah, wow. And cuz I hadn't seen things
13:41
like Chopping mall or Green animator before that, so OK.
13:45
But I I remember when we watched it, I was like, why did they
13:49
cast this woman who is obviously way too young to be the
13:52
matriarch of this family? And then I found out that Babs
13:55
just looks good. Yeah, she's just hot.
13:58
Yeah. Yeah, she aged super, super
14:01
well. So Barbara and Co, the rest of
14:06
the production, team director and whatnot, they had a few
14:10
different people in mind, but the name that they started with
14:13
and kept going back to over and over again for the role of Jacob
14:17
was Larry Fessenden. Barbara had worked with him
14:19
multiple times before, and she said they kind of had similar
14:22
experiences where they've played not necessarily lead roles.
14:25
And she thought that this is a role that he would really get a
14:27
chance to shine as like a leading man.
14:30
Yeah, he had a much lesser role in your necks.
14:33
He just gets. Killed in the opening.
14:35
Yeah, I think, And we joke around, we have a hard time
14:37
remembering his name, 'cause we always want to make it Larry
14:39
Fessinger. Yeah, it's.
14:42
I just. I struggle to remember it.
14:44
But I always remember his face and I'm always like this is that
14:46
fucking guy. He's always good.
14:48
I I always like him and everything I see.
14:50
Yeah, I like him and everything I see.
14:51
And it is honestly like a thing where it's like I we never see
14:54
much of him. And I remember when we first
14:55
watched this, maybe we're like oh Larry fessing then.
14:58
OK, nice to see the 5 minutes we'll see him on screen for.
15:02
He did. He has.
15:03
He has LED a movie, though. He led like a movie.
15:06
I think that he was like heavily involved in the production of
15:10
let's see Larry fessing, Let's go look it up because I want to
15:13
like actually, OK, you know, say what it is Larry fessing.
15:17
I have it. That's what it's called.
15:19
Dude, look, See how skinny he was back then?
15:21
Yeah, that was on the last drive then too.
15:23
And then what was the movie that we were talking about last
15:25
night? That he was in where he was kind
15:28
of a killer, kind of a hostage. Shit, Let's see.
15:33
That was a weird movie, and it was also one where he kept
15:35
popping back up over again. And we were like, weird for
15:38
Larry Fessenden, but not mad about it because we like seeing
15:40
him on screen. He's in the dead don't die.
15:43
A lot of people are in the Dead Don't Die, and you really need
15:45
to give that movie another chance.
15:49
Don't know. I would watch it again just for
15:52
that one scene of Adam Driver driving up in his little tiny
15:55
Smart car. That is there.
15:57
It is like me. Like me see 2017.
16:00
That's OK OK Ish. No.
16:03
OK, so they really spent a lot of time like working on their
16:08
back stories for each other, like how they imagine the other,
16:12
like their character sees the other character and how their
16:14
character sees themselves. And they got the director Travis
16:18
involved in it two and got some of his feedback.
16:23
And so there it was really collaborative.
16:24
They spent a long time in pre production, basically while they
16:28
were trying to get the funds and everything and even after they
16:32
got the funds because they didn't fully pull Larry on until
16:34
they were like ready to start shooting, yeah.
16:37
This seems like the type of movie that he would have been
16:38
fully on board with like from the get go.
16:41
Well, because it was one of those things that I didn't know
16:42
for sure. It was happening.
16:44
So OK And yeah, when they were shooting, basically they were
16:47
like living on the set together, just like staying in separate
16:51
rooms. She was like, it was kind of
16:52
like being an actual married couple because like, we're
16:54
sitting there together. We're hanging out together,
16:56
eating our meals together. That's cool.
16:57
Yeah. So they get to build that
16:59
chemistry that makes this movie kind of work.
17:02
Yeah, I think that that kind of worked in their benefit.
17:04
Yeah, and it helped that they'd worked together on multiple
17:07
projects and stuff before and had a good working relationship
17:10
already and a good rapport. So that's really all I have for
17:13
my fun facts. Like I said, it was kind of
17:16
light there. What?
17:17
Some call this an obscure movie, which is why it would be
17:20
difficult to find fun facts on it.
17:22
I guess it depends on who you're talking to.
17:24
Our bubbies over on Twitter would highly disagree.
17:27
So when Travis put out the call for reviews, he listed it as an
17:29
obscure movie. And I kind of questioned that
17:32
word choice but didn't say anything 'cause whatever.
17:34
He's doing the tweeting and it's been one of our more popular,
17:38
like announcements for a movie I.
17:40
Swear to God, y'all, you all did that shit out of spite.
17:43
And I appreciate it. I appreciate it.
17:45
It's. OK, I'm OK, it's.
17:46
Funny watching him go. But the entire, yeah, I was just
17:49
like. Oh.
17:52
Everybody's making me look like a damn fool.
17:54
OK? All right.
17:56
What's your good? Good, bad, ugly and absurd.
17:57
Yeah. OK, so First off, I think the
18:02
best thing about this movie is how Barbara Crampton and Larry
18:06
Fessinger playoff of each other. I mean it's like.
18:10
Did you do that on purpose? Did I fuck it up?
18:12
Yeah, no, I I was legitimately trying.
18:15
To. Fessen, where are you fessing
18:21
them? I thought that they did a great
18:22
job together. Honestly, it's really cool.
18:25
Which I guess is also to say I feel like this movie does a good
18:28
job of it has the makings of being like a certain type of
18:33
story. Like you got her and she is like
18:37
finding this newfound strength. And in a lot of ways, like this
18:42
movie would go with her just standing up to him and attacking
18:44
him and like moving on. But like instead it's about the
18:48
two of them growing together. Which I thought was an
18:52
interesting twist. Because you don't really think
18:54
that going like with how things are progressing at the beginning
18:57
of the movie and it keeps you on your toes and it makes it a lot
19:01
more entertaining to watch whenever it like subverts your
19:04
expectations like that. I also thought that the effects
19:08
were really solid on this, especially for it being as cheap
19:11
as it sounds like. They have a shit ton of blood
19:16
shooting out and I don't think that that's CG blood that looked
19:19
like it was real. Yeah, I mean, I thought they
19:21
would have even had the budget for CG blood.
19:23
But yeah, that's like, you know, you have to set up like rigging
19:26
and stuff and feel it just right, so.
19:29
Yeah, and it looks great too. I think the vampire stuff in
19:33
this movie is legitimately creepy too, which I think is
19:35
really difficult to do because I don't necessarily find vampires
19:38
scary. Well, and they definitely, I
19:41
mean, this was also listed as trivia, even though I think it's
19:44
pretty obvious that Bonnie Ariens makeup was based off of
19:46
count. Yeah.
19:47
Definitely. But like that, like, the master
19:51
is actually scary whenever they're on screen.
19:55
Like, it's really creepy. Even the other vampire, Emilia,
20:00
like, whenever she has her moment when she intervenes with
20:03
them, like she's pretty intimidating.
20:05
I don't know, Like you get major props from me whenever you make
20:09
me feel that, like tension and like creepiness when I'm
20:13
watching a vampire. Yeah, I I like that.
20:16
It's kind of a subversion of the typical vampire thing thing
20:20
where you have to be like invited in to the home.
20:23
It's not being invited into the home.
20:25
It's being invited into like the host, basically.
20:28
Yeah. And I think that's interesting.
20:31
So yeah, that's pretty much my good stuff for this.
20:34
I agree with all of what you said, and I'm just gonna add a
20:36
few other points. I think they're.
20:39
I think it's interesting to have both characters that do good and
20:42
bad things. It makes them very human and
20:44
real. And I think that their
20:47
relationship is also very human and real.
20:49
Like, it's honestly just kind of sad to watch what they're going
20:54
through because it is a thing that so many couples do go
20:57
through that growing apart, that resentment, you know, And she's
21:01
afraid to speak up and she's in, you know, in a society
21:05
especially like where she's, she's a minister's wife, you
21:08
know, she's expected to be quiet and dutiful.
21:12
And so she wants to speak up but doesn't feel like she can.
21:15
And that's constantly reinforced around her.
21:18
And either Jacob doesn't notice or he notices but is perfectly
21:24
content to live that way. And I don't know which is worse,
21:29
you know. So it's just it's one of those
21:31
things, it's all too real and you see it all too often.
21:35
So I think that that's like a really, like, they're very real
21:37
characters, you know? And also like just like the
21:40
little ways that she like is just, you can see that she's
21:44
discontented. They show like, her being
21:45
annoyed by the way he brushes his teeth.
21:48
Yeah, like things like that. I think it's got some good funny
21:52
moments, like when she starts realizing she's super powerful
21:56
and she's like picking up different furniture and dancing
21:59
around. At first she's dancing around
22:00
with the lamp, but then she starts like rearranging their
22:03
their house's furniture, like just by lifting up the couch and
22:07
putting it over there. It's it's real fun.
22:10
And then also, I like that up until the very end, even after
22:15
Jacob has heard the master, Todd keeps referring to the master as
22:18
him. I think it's just like another
22:20
nice little detail about like how deeply ingrained they are in
22:24
like patriarchal standards in their lives and and their
22:30
society and the way they're living That.
22:31
Like even though it's this woman vampire that has chosen women to
22:36
turn and even specifically says I choose the ones that I want to
22:40
turn and the rest are snacks. We only see women, vampires in
22:43
this, and even up until the very end Jacob is calling the master
22:47
him. So I think that's really
22:50
interesting. Wait, did they ever correct
22:52
them? No.
22:54
OK. But it honestly kind of feels
22:56
like maybe it would have. And that's the other thing too,
22:58
is that at the very end, where Jacob does make that like, you
23:03
know, they've had this whole talk, They get high and they
23:05
talk out their problems and it feels like they kind of have a
23:10
new appreciation for each other. You know, she's like, you're
23:12
always talking over me, but I'm also not speaking up enough.
23:15
So they're kind of are acknowledging their flaws and
23:19
they apologize and it looks like they're working towards it a
23:22
little bit better. And for him to stab the master
23:26
when Ann is trying to make that decision for herself is such a
23:30
slip back into their old dynamics.
23:32
And that also feels very real when you're trying to work
23:35
through troubled relationship dynamics.
23:37
You know, it's not a a thing that you just like slip through
23:42
in a day or two, you know? So I I think there there are so
23:46
many layers to this movie and I think it's really good and it's
23:50
just also it's a fun little vampire vampire romp and we get
23:53
more vampire lore that makes no goddamn sense.
23:57
Yeah, only only in universe, 'cause that's how vampire lore
24:01
works, you know? I guess that would be like, one
24:04
of my only bad things is like, I don't know, what is the fucking
24:08
war here, You know what I mean? Like, I don't.
24:10
I just, I never know the war of vampire movies, and I feel like
24:15
they're always a little bit more tricky.
24:18
This one, I don't think it ever paints like what the rules are.
24:21
Not really, no. Which I don't know.
24:23
I think it would have been cool to like explore that a little
24:25
bit. It feels like it's a little bit
24:27
in between typical vampire and Twilight in terms of sunlight
24:32
exposure. You know, like she can have some
24:33
sunlight, but too much and she will.
24:36
Like she has just like that one light from the dentist shining
24:40
on her mouth and it burns her, but then everything else is
24:43
totally cool. Yeah, like she can go outside
24:45
with like a hood and that's fine.
24:48
But like in Buffy, you'll see if any of the vampires go out in
24:51
the day, they have to fully cover themselves.
24:53
They can't even have. It's not even just like a little
24:55
hood cuz I don't have to get to their faces, but.
24:57
We don't even get that here. Like what happens if she has a
24:59
flashlight? Like, you know, normal wise, I
25:01
don't know. She had a flashlight and she's
25:03
been inside her house and inside the grocery store, so that
25:05
didn't. Seem to affect her.
25:07
Yeah. It just like super highly
25:08
constant, like light. It would burn just about any, I
25:11
think. Maybe it's like AUV ray,
25:12
basically because I feel like that's what they use for teeth
25:15
whitening. Maybe so.
25:17
No, no, I mean that's. So she needs to stay out of
25:19
tanning beds. Yeah, yeah, most people should.
25:22
Yes, agreed. I mean, that's pretty much my
25:25
only bad for this movie, though. I agree it kind of, I guess in
25:31
general I would like more world building.
25:33
Yeah, you know. There was a lot of potential
25:36
there. Yeah, with that, like, you know,
25:38
like what I want to see. Like the fucking army of like
25:41
other vampires that the Master created too.
25:43
We only see Amelia and. Yeah.
25:46
And and I think, you know, it's partially budget constraints and
25:49
also this was filmed during COVID, so that's true.
25:52
Yeah, I think both of those things really worked against
25:55
what it could have done. But I think, you know, the fact
25:57
that they said it in a small town helps some.
26:00
Yeah, I do like though that they like you see two, at least two
26:06
examples of how the master chooses her victims.
26:10
And it's always people with, like, troubled home lives, yes.
26:14
Yeah, yeah. Well, and here's the thing too,
26:16
is that I think it it, in a way, this movie kind of makes me
26:20
think of Midsummer, where, you know, the whole thing with
26:24
Midsummer is that cults lure in people that are lonely and in
26:31
need of some kind of like a support or whatever.
26:35
And then it happens to Amelia, 'cause she is like home alone
26:39
with her mom, who has some very severe substance abuse issues.
26:42
And then we've got Anne, who is feeling very unfulfilled in her
26:46
marriage. And like, so we've got the
26:47
Master coming in and enticing them with strength and no
26:52
boundaries or limitations on their life.
26:54
And they can just do whatever they want, which is the thing
26:57
that they haven't always had. And I think it's especially
27:00
smart when the Master is using that language of like, oh, he
27:02
won't be able to control you anymore, even though she is
27:05
literally a vampire called The Master.
27:08
You know what I mean? Yes, Who has in fact controlled
27:13
Anne's bodily movements earlier in the movie.
27:15
See, I feel like that's something that could have been
27:17
explored too, is like the fact that they're not choosing this
27:20
life, this the master's making these huge decisions for them.
27:23
And I guess like thinks that they're helping them, but like,
27:26
you know, like, they're not really asking if that's the type
27:29
of thing that they really want. I feel like it would have been
27:30
interesting to explore somebody having, you know, conflicting
27:33
feelings about becoming a vampire.
27:35
Yeah. Well, I mean and that's kind of
27:37
what we're getting with Anne, but we, you know there's.
27:39
So many embraces it from the get go I don't think she ever has.
27:42
She becomes a vampire and does not look back the entire time.
27:46
It would have been interesting to see her like go through and
27:49
get like tired of the restrictions of it.
27:52
But I feel like there aren't any.
27:53
I mean the thirst for blood. She's eventually going to have
27:56
to figure out how to manage that without hoping that they just
27:59
run across dead bodies all the time.
28:00
Luckily for her, you can buy blood at the supermarket,
28:03
apparently. Which she does.
28:06
That blood made her sick, though, because it wasn't human.
28:09
Oh, well then we're not playing by Twilight rules in our way.
28:12
See, that's the fucking problem. What is happening here in
28:17
Twilight? They said it's OK, OK, ugly.
28:22
I thought that they made Jacob so fucking disgusting.
28:29
These scenes, whenever he's like chewing, like smacking his lips
28:32
and shit like that, they make him like a truly disgusting and
28:35
ugly person. And like, you can see why
28:38
there's some problems there. But I feel like they did a good
28:40
job with that. I also thought it was disgusting
28:43
whenever we see the bite mark from.
28:45
Oh my God. And it just starts pulsating.
28:49
That right there takes a lot for me to be like, okay, that's a
28:52
lot. But that one right there did it
28:54
for me and I just too much I would have not had on my bingo
28:57
card. Vampire Bite makes me upset.
29:00
But there it. Is it did and it's just it's
29:02
just fucking pulsing. Yeah, we both squirmed.
29:05
That's good effects, but God damn it's ugly.
29:07
Yeah, yeah, I guess. I guess my ugly is basically
29:12
just, you know how it was so easy for her to fall into that
29:16
position where she is expected to be the quiet, dutiful wife
29:19
and everybody was just OK with it.
29:21
Even when she tries to speak up, everybody talks over her.
29:24
It's realistic and sad and ugly. Yeah, yeah it is.
29:30
It's also ugly that it took cheating him and becoming a
29:33
vampire for her to, like, stand up to him.
29:35
And OK, let's also talk about the allegory to victim blaming.
29:39
Because he said that this is your penance, this is what you
29:41
get. You deserve.
29:42
You deserve to be turned into the undead.
29:46
You deserve the attack on you nearly dying because you kissed
29:51
another man. I can say, though, that that
29:54
probably just came from like a personal hurt.
29:56
I'm sure it did, but I don't know.
29:59
I think it's there's also like an ugliness in saying the most
30:04
hurtful thing that you can think of when you're hurting versus
30:07
like just expressing that you're hurting.
30:10
You know what I mean? I.
30:11
Mean. It's not the healthiest way to
30:13
handle that situation. Especially if you're a supposed
30:16
man of God. Well, he kind of just says fuck
30:19
that shit. Like halfway through this movie
30:21
here, he's like, yeah, I'm gonna start smoking weed.
30:25
And he goes full via Condios. This is Apsa.
30:28
He hits that duty and he's like, that's it.
30:31
I'm fucking with vampires. He's had vampires.
30:34
So trying to teach us. Yeah, they're like, hey, if you
30:39
smoke that pot of marijuana, a whole pot of it.
30:43
A whole pot of it. You will begin fucking a
30:46
vampire. Barbara that's what you smoke
30:48
pot. That is what you smoke weed in,
30:49
right? As pots.
30:50
That's why weed has become legal and so many states is that
30:54
everybody is like, well, yeah, I want.
30:55
To be a vampire. Barbara Creams as a vampire and
31:00
a man of God. Like they're they're winning
31:04
that part. You're a man of God, at least.
31:07
OK. Absurd.
31:08
Well, there's one scene in particular when they're walking.
31:12
Actually there's many scenes, but they're walking through the
31:14
house and they have an entire wall full of pictures.
31:18
And it's just from like the bottom to the floor all the way
31:21
to the roof, just pictures all over the wall.
31:24
Who the fuck does that? Ministers.
31:27
Families in small towns, living in houses that they've likely
31:30
inherited from families. I don't.
31:32
I guarantee some of those are like his grandmother's photos.
31:36
No, I don't think so. I'm not buying that shit.
31:38
That's ridiculous. My absurd is Oscar and Ellie and
31:47
they're feud with the local pastor.
31:50
Like why? They're like going to a church
31:53
to smoke weed and then they get offended when.
31:56
Yeah, when the. Minister comes out, it's like,
31:58
hey, don't be smoking weed on the property.
32:00
Yeah, that's. Let's go with that from my
32:04
absurd. Isn't it also weird that all the
32:06
shit goes down at this Nil where she's working?
32:10
Like that's where they go to also smoke weed and have sex.
32:13
That's where she goes to have her affair.
32:15
That's where she goes to work. That's where the vampire also
32:17
stays in a box. That's just kind of chilling
32:20
there. It was a crate delivered much
32:23
like count warlock and. And nobody.
32:26
Nobody's questioning this shit and nobody's working there.
32:28
Apparently this mill is like abandoned.
32:30
Yeah, it's abandoned. And there was like this whole
32:33
town debate about like what to do with it, preserve it for
32:36
historical or turn it into like a retail thing.
32:40
And that's what her character was saying earlier on, that they
32:42
got it approved to turn into retail.
32:44
But they're saving the structural foundation and they
32:46
fought really hard for it. And he completely ignores
32:49
everything she said and said, oh great, they're gonna tear down
32:53
the mill. Oh, that's right.
32:55
Yeah, I. Forgot about that.
32:56
One of those examples of him just like not paying attention
32:59
to the things she cares about, has worked on.
33:01
He's like, what does this have to do with Jacob?
33:03
Oh, Jacob doesn't like that. Means bad.
33:06
I hope this doesn't reflect on me being like him, but I just,
33:09
like actually envisioned her, like putting on her hard hat.
33:12
Like I'm going to the mill today, Jacob.
33:15
It gets her like lunch pail and just walks out the door.
33:17
Dude, I thought she'd have a bedazzled hard hat.
33:19
She served looks after she got turned.
33:24
Did she you think she went shopping and bought that dress
33:26
or did she had that dress? No, because he he said that like
33:29
after the attack, like he was talking to his brother and he's
33:32
like she's got a new haircut and a new sexy dress.
33:35
I don't think he said Sexy dress, but like the donation was
33:37
there, like I could. See her breasts?
33:41
The temptation? Dress.
33:43
The dress of desire, I bet she. Shoplifted it too.
33:47
Probably, yeah, so. All.
33:50
Right. Yeah.
33:51
So it's time for. Ratings.
33:54
I like this movie. I liked it a lot whenever we
33:56
watched it the first time. We did a watch along for our
33:59
first watch, by the way, with actual, you know, Babs herself.
34:02
Yeah. And it's.
34:02
On Twitter or. Something, yeah, somebody
34:04
arranged to like Watch along when it premiered on Shutter and
34:08
we had a good time. Watching.
34:09
Yeah, it was cool and I had a good time.
34:11
Then I had a good time last night.
34:13
I think I'm going to give it 7.5. 7.5 I think I'm going to
34:18
give it an 8. It's one of those that has just
34:21
stuck with me. It will stick with me again.
34:24
And now that we've watched it again recently, I really, I
34:30
really like what it what it did and I would love to see like a
34:35
sequel or something with more funding behind it to see what
34:38
they could really do with this premise.
34:40
I would. Love to see the adventures that
34:42
they go on together 'cause like, I feel like there's a lot of
34:45
potential there. You could just go balls to the
34:47
wall with the next movie. And like The thing is too, they
34:50
they have like a sense of humor with them too.
34:53
And it's not super in your face. And I think if they had more of
34:55
a budget to work with where they don't necessarily have to
34:58
balance out, like, OK, we got to focus on the horror here.
35:01
And like, like they can really play around with it and have
35:03
some fun. So we have a starting average of
35:05
7.75 and I think that's fantastic.
35:07
I think that's good. That's that's less rude than the
35:09
IMDb. Yes, absolutely.
35:11
All right, so let's kick this off.
35:14
We start off with a shot of a little mousey poo groom in
35:17
itself. Probably a rat, really, but it
35:19
looks so cute. Kind of reminded me of.
35:23
I think you pointed out. It's how Scout grooms herself.
35:26
Yeah, like licking little paws and then rubbing the head.
35:28
I thought it was interesting that other like a a mouse or a
35:31
rat would do the same thing. Yeah.
35:34
Then we see a church fan. And then we cut to Jacob
35:36
actually preaching. Talking about husbands loving
35:41
their wives. I'm sorry I haven't been to
35:43
church in a decade or so, so I'm not fully familiar with this
35:49
verse, but it it's setting up the plot about how a husband
35:53
needs to be devoted to his wife. But then, like, secretly behind
35:56
the scenes, it's the kind of the other way going around.
35:59
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's just giving this sermon
36:02
there as a person that's been to a lot of church sermons and
36:07
their life. Usually, like, these guys just
36:10
go up there and they like, they have like a pregame, like a
36:14
plan, and then just go out there and they just start like
36:16
spitting shit. Spitting fire, he'll fire.
36:20
My favorite's when they like get surprised like by what they say,
36:25
it's happened a lot, but like they're like, I just thought of
36:27
that shit in my head just now. This is probably what he's
36:29
thinking right now. I love the idea that a pastor's
36:32
like, yo, I improv that and I want everybody to know someone,
36:35
'cause we do that to each other, we'll make jokes around our
36:38
house and be like, I just came up with that.
36:39
Are you proud of me? Like fully say those exact words
36:42
out loud. That's what Jacobs like right
36:44
here. He's like, love your wife.
36:46
God damn, I just thought of that shit.
36:48
Yo, write that down. Everybody's just taking notes.
36:53
There afterwards they talked to their parishioners and Amelia is
36:58
there and it's actually Anne who's like, hey, I've noticed
37:02
your mom hasn't been here lately.
37:03
Is everything OK? And I think that's like very
37:06
astute of her and shows that she's like, also paying
37:09
attention and really cares. Yeah, and yeah, it turns out
37:12
Amelia's mother has a past history with substance abuse
37:16
issues and has, sadly, you know, is experience in a relapse.
37:23
Yeah, they just say she's been drinking.
37:25
Again, yeah. Which OK again from somebody
37:27
who's been to church, like people will think if you just
37:30
drink a a beer sometimes it's like that's it.
37:34
Yeah, no more. It's kind of heavily implied
37:37
that it's more than that. It is in this case, yeah.
37:39
But, like, you could also get this conversation and it could
37:42
be like, yeah, she had a beer last night and it'd be like, oh
37:45
God, I'm so sorry. I know you.
37:46
But you know, Jacob's like well, all she needs is the Lord.
37:50
So how about I come over and talk to her and?
37:53
He's like I'm the Lord. Jacob doing the Lord's work
37:57
because I am the Lord. And.
38:00
That's Jacob with AK, because I'm a cool pastor.
38:03
He's a youth pastor. That would be how?
38:06
Oh my God. He flips the seat around
38:07
backgrounds. He's like, I'm here today to rap
38:10
about Jesus. He's like Kelvin, like he's got
38:14
his hair spiked up. Do you think at any point Jacob
38:17
has had an army of strong boys? That's what I want the sequel
38:20
to. I wanted him to have his own
38:22
little Cole. He's like, she's got her vampire
38:25
Cole. Oh my God.
38:26
OK, so they have sex high and she goes to do a little neck
38:30
nibble, but accidentally turns him.
38:34
So then he starts turning boy vampires and he gets his army of
38:40
strong boys. Yeah.
38:41
Yeah. Guys, if you haven't seen
38:43
Register Simmons, watch that shit.
38:45
Absolutely. It's there's three seasons.
38:48
It's really, honestly, you go through it too quickly.
38:51
It's amazing. OK, All right.
38:54
So Amelia walks to maybe the next town over.
38:59
I feel like she's walking forever.
39:02
It's. Cool.
39:03
I love the shots that they have here, but like, they just had
39:05
too many of them and it looks like she's just walking the
39:08
fucking country to go back home. It, like the sun, hits high noon
39:13
and goes down below the horizon. And then it rises again.
39:18
Yeah, a rooster crows. Yeah, and she makes it along a
39:24
stretch. You.
39:25
Think maybe she was secretly hoping Jacob would offer to talk
39:28
to her mother that night so she could get a ride home, I feel.
39:31
Like she might have been hitting her.
39:32
She's like, yeah, well. That's why she looks so
39:34
disappointed when he said he'd come visit tomorrow.
39:36
She's like OK. So she makes it outside her
39:42
house, It's night time, and then she starts hearing somebody
39:45
whisper her name. Amelia.
39:48
And then she tries to go back. Spanish.
39:51
Spanish. Roku.
39:56
Spanish. She makes it to her door, but
39:57
then she gets. She gets creepy handed on the
40:02
shoulders. Yeah.
40:04
So little snatch. Yeah, little snatchy snatch.
40:08
So then we cut 2. And, you know, it's a bad news
40:11
because the captions say squelch.
40:13
Oh yeah, that's where I if a squelch.
40:15
Yeah. If a horror movie ever has the
40:18
caption squelch, squelching squelches, you know any
40:22
conjugation of that word it you're dead.
40:26
Or stepping in somebody who is dead the.
40:28
Funny thing is though, I don't think I heard a squelch here.
40:31
I just. Saw, just saw Squelch.
40:33
Yeah, like the subliminal squelch.
40:35
They're like the squad was there, He trusted.
40:38
On this one, OK, so Anne is looking at herself in the mirror
40:44
in an all too real moment of just looking at everything and
40:47
just wondering where the years went and how to regain her youth
40:51
and beauty. And which is ridiculous because
40:53
it it's, you know, that line and Barbie where it's like, note to
40:56
the director, Margot Robbie is the wrong person to send this
41:00
message. Same with Barbara Crampton.
41:03
Yeah, she yeah, she's aged. But God, she doesn't look.
41:06
She does not look her age. Just purely by normal.
41:09
She looks my age. Yeah, it's like, I get it.
41:13
I get it. But yeah, wrong person for this
41:16
right here. Yeah, she's even doing her
41:18
workout. So we see her doing that.
41:19
I. Love her and her little Gray
41:21
sweatsuit. Yeah, she's like got her little
41:24
6 pounders and she found a line to her 80s aerobics video.
41:29
Keep it in tone, it's amazing she's.
41:30
Doing good and and then Jacob gets a call and it's about
41:33
Amelia's disappearance. So they talked to the sheriff.
41:38
I wrote his name down at some point, but I didn't write it
41:41
down here, 'cause I didn't say it yet, OK?
41:43
I didn't write many more notes. Just basically the cops were
41:45
questioning what was going on and and tries to, like, defend
41:49
Amelia. She's like, she's not the type
41:51
that would just run off. She was taking care of her
41:53
mother. She's been devoted to taking
41:55
care of her mother for a long time, and this just isn't.
41:58
She's not somebody that would just run off with a boy like
42:00
that, but they all just dismiss her.
42:03
And then at dinner that night with Jacob's brother Bob and his
42:07
wife Carol. Carol, they are talking about it
42:11
and he was like, it's probably the dad.
42:13
And Anne's like, well, her dad's dead and he goes well and it's
42:16
probably a boyfriend. God damn, it's always that.
42:19
Sorry about the blasphemy. Bob is like a really fun side
42:22
character because he just has like fun little one liners like
42:26
that. And he's not necessarily a great
42:28
person, but he's also, again, a realistic person.
42:31
Yeah, he's actually. It is kind of interesting to see
42:34
him be his brother and he's definitely not a religious guy.
42:38
Yeah, I was thinking about like how I would feel if one of my
42:40
sisters became a pre preacher, priest, minister, minister do.
42:49
You like how he did that? See that?
42:52
Yeah, that would be. This is the type of stuff I'm
42:54
talking about, so yeah. Yeah.
42:56
I would probably have to say sorry about the blasphemy
42:59
multiple times. Yeah.
43:02
And then Jacob just keeps cutting off Anne every time she
43:05
tries to say anything. And it's so frustrating to
43:07
watch. It's like why don't fucking
43:08
talk? Yeah.
43:09
No, one other thing is that when they're talking about Amelia,
43:13
Anne is pointing out like cuz they're all have theories that
43:16
she ran off or smarted off the wrong person or this or that and
43:20
she was like you realize that we have this teenager missing and
43:24
you guys are all blaming her. Yeah, so.
43:27
Which is kind of fucked up for him, especially because he's
43:30
supposed to be like a very he's supposed to be a supportive
43:32
figure for the community, especially for her, since she
43:35
was a member of that church. Yes, he's like.
43:37
Well, she's probably fucked up and it's all.
43:39
Her fault walks 20 miles to that church.
43:42
To listen to your bullshit, To listen to love your wife.
43:45
Is that the best she got today, Jacob?
43:48
We knew that shit guy didn't come up with that one by
43:52
himself. Then we cut to very aggressive
43:56
teeth brushing. Like, so aggressive.
43:58
Like, I worry for his gums. Like, you know, the dentist is
44:01
like, you need to chill a little.
44:04
Here's a soft bristle. Yeah.
44:06
And I say this as somebody that my dentist has been like, hey,
44:10
you need to chill. Here's a soft whistle.
44:14
I've never. I've been with you and you've
44:16
brushed your teeth. You never have brushed your
44:18
teeth as aggressively. As Jacob has no because I don't
44:20
wanna, like, smear toothpaste all over my face.
44:23
The way he He looks rabid. This is how he fights the demon
44:27
right here. He's gotta do it somehow, take
44:30
out his aggression on his teeth. And then he crawls into bed and
44:33
snores louder than Talia. He's a nasty sleeper.
44:37
Yeah, that's like the best way to describe it.
44:40
Like I I would. I I had a roommate that was just
44:43
like this guy, Worst fucking snoring ever.
44:45
And yeah, it's not fun. And I can understand why She's
44:49
starting to have some resentment being around him during this
44:52
shit. Yeah, I don't know.
44:54
If she doesn't work during the day, then maybe a good pair of
44:58
ear earplugs. You can work it out, yeah.
45:01
Like, it's not his fault that he does this because.
45:03
I don't blame him for snoring, but it's also kind of one of
45:06
those things that when you get, it's the bitch eating crackers
45:09
thing. Like when you get so annoyed
45:11
with something, somebody, everything they do becomes
45:13
annoying and it'll be like, man, just look at this bitch eating
45:15
crackers, yeah. I've never heard that before,
45:18
but I get. It yeah, no, it's one of my
45:20
favorite terms to describe this. Like where you're just like,
45:22
look at this fucking bitch eating some crackers.
45:25
I've had that before, dude. Everybody's had.
45:29
That's what I'm saying. These characters are so well
45:31
written because you can relate to this moment where you're
45:33
looking at someone and you're like, could you brush your teeth
45:35
less annoyingly? No.
45:37
I remember one time in high school, like one of our friends
45:40
was walking down the hall and for some reason I was just not
45:42
having it. I remember I like, looked over
45:46
at one of my friends, was like, I don't fucking like him right
45:50
now. That was it.
45:51
I decided then I was fun. It didn't take much.
46:01
So and does some macrame work, and here's.
46:06
Ricky Spanish. Over breakfast, she tells Jacob
46:12
about the proposal for the mill being repurposed to a retail
46:15
area and that her team fought really hard to keep the
46:18
foundation because the city wanted to just tear everything
46:21
down. And he was like, so the mills
46:23
not gonna be preserved as a historical site.
46:29
Sounds like something that makes Jacob angry.
46:32
I need to go to work. Do you have breakfast ready?
46:35
You know what? I bet he wanted her.
46:38
He was trying his best upholsterings And turn that into
46:40
a mega church. Oh my God, I.
46:42
Guarant Fucking. To you again.
46:44
We just need to write just gemstones.
46:46
Yeah, sequel to this. No, she tells him that they've
46:50
got a design firm that's ready to do this, and it's actually
46:53
their representative is somebody that used to live in town.
46:56
It's Tom Lowe. And he goes, oh, the one you had
46:58
a fling with. And she's like Jacob, we've been
47:01
married for 30 years. And he goes.
47:06
Yeah, so she's like, well, I'm gonna have a meal with him so
47:09
and he's like, well, tell him I said hi, that's.
47:13
It And then she has this moment, she's putting on the lipstick
47:16
and it's it's a bright red lipstick, which is not like,
47:20
that's not a bad thing. I'm a fan of bright, bold
47:22
lipsticks, but for her you can tell it's a thing she doesn't do
47:26
very often. And like in the mirror, she like
47:28
mouths. Yeah, she's trying to bring
47:31
herself. Up.
47:31
And then she realizes that it doesn't doesn't work for her and
47:34
she wipes it off, but she does show up to their meal.
47:38
And Tom is kind of surprised that she's like Jacob.
47:41
He was like, you used to be so wild and adventurous and always
47:43
talked about moving out. And she's like, well, my mom
47:46
died. You weren't there for me.
47:48
Jacob was. So was the church.
47:51
And she's like, and we're happy. It's just the most convincing
47:54
we're happy. Don't get me wrong, we're happy.
47:57
Yeah, yeah. No, we're definitely, we're
47:59
we're happy. So they go to the mill.
48:02
The mill, sorry, that was my that was my hit coming out.
48:06
They go to the mill and they apparently used to hook up
48:09
there. And he's like, listen, this job
48:12
takes me all over the world. I got so much money, so many
48:16
bitches, you would not believe. But I came back to this little
48:20
bum fuck town because I wanted to see you.
48:22
And how about we hook up in this dusty, musty warehouse and she's
48:26
like, wow, Tom, you're so romantic.
48:29
Let's kiss on this crate of rats.
48:32
And that's what happens. Rats.
48:34
Yeah. Yeah.
48:36
Nobody's questioning this fucking crate there.
48:39
I think for Anne, it's a little bit of like the thrill of being
48:43
wanted. Again, I'm not excusing her
48:46
cheating, just I think that's really where it's coming from.
48:49
Like it's the thrill of being wanted and being wanted by
48:52
somebody. That's not Jacob who fucking
48:55
brushes his teeth and snores and probably eats crackers.
48:58
God, how? Yeah.
49:00
Now, Thomas is kind of a scummy dude here, too.
49:02
It's like, I mean he's straight up going for when he knows good
49:05
and well. That yeah, he's not her knight
49:07
in shining armor. Yeah, and she even does like try
49:10
and pull back a couple of times, but then she always leans back
49:13
in. Oh, and also, can I apologize
49:16
because I, in the previous episode claimed that this was
49:18
Carter. That Dick.
49:20
Yeah, but it's not. He's not even in this movie.
49:22
He's not at all I. Just imagine that entire thing,
49:25
apparently. Yeah, you were like, oh, scummy
49:29
Marriage Breaker Upper. How are you, Dick?
49:32
Yeah, so yeah, he. All of the rats decide that
49:36
they're gonna attack Tom. And while Anne is appropriately
49:42
distracted by this, she gets she gets a little nibble from the
49:46
master. The vampire goes.
49:48
Karl, it's. Just like straight up like, is
49:52
that the vampire zone? Is that the war of this this
49:56
universe? Back at home, Jacob is calling
49:58
Bob to see if Ann is there, maybe visiting Carol.
50:02
But then she walks in and she's like facing away from him and is
50:05
giving like very short answers. Good, OK, good night.
50:09
And then in the bathroom, she has basically a panic attack
50:12
because she's been like, you see, like she's got a terrible
50:16
neck wound and is covered in blood.
50:18
Yeah, she is fucked. Up.
50:20
And I think it's so sad that she's going through that alone,
50:26
you know? I mean, how do you explain that?
50:28
Right. Like, it's a terrible thing to
50:31
have to explain. Like the kissing, but also like,
50:35
hey, can we deal with that after we deal with the fact that I'm
50:38
bleeding from my carotid? He would just pray for her or
50:42
something. It'd be like if the Lord wants
50:44
you to live. Yeah, this is God's will.
50:48
Buy it. I eat my crackers.
50:52
So Jacob wakes up alone in the bed.
50:54
He's a little bit surprised, but she's working out.
50:58
And before her routine also involved getting up even earlier
51:01
than him working out and cooking his breakfast.
51:04
But today she was just focused on working out.
51:05
She said she's not hungry, she's not making you breakfast, and
51:08
he's like, well, I guess I'll get breakfast in town.
51:14
Tell me if you have time to stop at a Burger King and get
51:17
yourself a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich, You have time to
51:19
scramble up an egg. And I'm pretty sure with your
51:22
job. Both take about 10 minutes and
51:23
you can make your own hours. Yeah, nobody's going to be at
51:26
the church at that hour. You know what I mean?
51:28
Like, just show up whenever you need to.
51:31
Yeah. I don't get it.
51:33
But yeah, and you're a fucking adult.
51:34
Like learn how to like, eat by yourself.
51:37
Eggs are like one of the first things you can learn to cook.
51:40
Like. It's just kind of sad how much
51:43
he, like, relies on her without realizing he's actually relying
51:46
on her. I really wish we had a scene of
51:49
him just like standing in the kitchen and just like standing.
51:53
There. Just like looking at their cast
51:54
iron and going, hmm? Looking at the cabin, it's like,
51:57
hmm, what is? Takes out a bag of flour and
52:01
just like puts a little in the pan and he's like this.
52:04
I'm just thinking of that scene from American Dad where Stan
52:08
gets high and he's at the grocery store just standing at,
52:10
like, staring at the chips, like, what the fuck do I do?
52:13
How do I make a decision? So yeah, and she's like, really
52:17
into her workout right now, too. Yeah.
52:19
And she's really strong, apparently.
52:20
Too, She's real strong and she's real angry and she is not
52:23
hungry. So outside of the church,
52:26
there's a couple smoking pot on the hood of their car and Jacob
52:29
takes a joint and they're like, you can't tell us what to do.
52:32
It's legal here. And he goes, actually it's not.
52:35
First of all. Also you're in the church
52:37
parking lot and also there is a girl your age missing.
52:41
So he just he he keeps their joint, which I think is kind of
52:45
funny. Yeah, he doesn't throw it away.
52:47
He like the fact that he kept it, you know, in the back of his
52:50
mind. He's like, I wanna like at least
52:51
try. Yeah, yeah, you notice maybe see
52:53
what's up with it back at home, he doesn't see Ann and he's kind
52:58
of looking around and then she startles him behind and she's
53:01
all dressed up and she said I want to go out and she's got a
53:04
new do and she's got a dress cut down betwixt the Booble area.
53:10
Yeah, the boobles. It's.
53:14
Nice. It's a nice dress.
53:15
It complements her really well. Yeah, and so they go out to eat,
53:18
but she doesn't want to eat and what?
53:20
The fuck, man, That's a power move.
53:22
She's like, yeah, all right, Like, give me the most expensive
53:25
shit on the menu. It's Chicken Travis I.
53:28
Know, but still it's funny like just like as an example, but
53:31
like I don't know, like she just looks at the waiter and the
53:34
waiter's like. Blinks her eyes and they had
53:36
thrown this funny little sound effect of like a thing to show
53:39
like her magnetism now. And the waiter's a little bit
53:41
startled. And Jacob's like, bring my wife
53:43
a box and she goes, no, I'm. Done.
53:47
She's like, throw that shit away.
53:49
Yeah. Yeah.
53:50
And then Jacob's like, all right, well, I'm gonna eat my
53:52
crackers and he's. Still chewing and like he's
53:55
chewing with his mouth open, it's.
53:58
It's so disgusting. God, this motherfucker does
54:02
like, learn how to eat properly. Just just do it, man.
54:06
Don't smack your fucking lips like that.
54:08
And he's drinking his wine and he's like, you should try it and
54:11
it's really good. And she looks like she is being
54:14
force fed Brussels sprouts like she's.
54:16
Like, yeah, and she's drinking wine too.
54:19
I thought, You know, wine might be OK for vampires, but
54:22
apparently not. Apparently not.
54:25
So they get home and in bed she flips them over, 'cause she's
54:29
annoyed. This was so weird to me.
54:32
Like, so they're like asleep and then just like quick cuts to her
54:35
standing over him and just like kicking him.
54:37
And then it cuts to the morning. It happens way too fast.
54:40
And she's like, I told you it was a bad dream and she's
54:42
cooking bacon for me and goes, you know what, I'll just stop
54:44
for breakfast on the way. And she goes, you need to stop
54:47
fucking cutting me off. And they like, argue a little
54:49
bit before he leaves. So she goes grocery shopping,
54:53
looks fucking amazing, like this shot of her grocery shop.
54:56
And I'm like, man, I wanna look so cool with Kroger and so I
54:59
usually wear like nice wet pants and have a ratty bun.
55:03
Get confused. Just confused too.
55:06
I guess to be fair here she's just kind of browsing around.
55:09
She stumbles nothing. Seems good.
55:12
And she she sees the blood from one of the the steaks.
55:15
Yeah, so. She sticks her finger in there
55:17
and starts clicking. And then somebody approaches her
55:20
and is like, can we help you? And she said, I want more of
55:23
this and he goes the blood. And then at home she's just,
55:26
she's got a gallon of it. She's pouring it into a little
55:28
goblet and she listens to some gothy fucking music and dances
55:32
around the house and does a little Fung shui.
55:34
It sounds like a nice self-care afternoon.
55:36
I just don't understand why his immediate reaction was the
55:39
blood. Nobody would be like, oh, you
55:40
want the steak? Because he watched her poke a
55:43
hole in that Saran wrap, dip her finger in the blood, and then
55:47
lick it. I still would have thought,
55:49
like, OK, you want the steak, right?
55:52
I like the steamer fairy. Like playing around with her
55:55
newfound power zone. Yeah, like I I think that blood
55:57
may have given her a little bit of strength.
56:00
Well, so I love it. And I also like, I feel like
56:03
it's not just her being excited about being strong enough to
56:06
move the furniture. I bet she's always wanted the
56:09
house arranged like this and Jacob never agreed to it.
56:12
Probably, yeah. I love they did a good job with
56:15
the fake furniture and her picking it up and just moving
56:18
around. It looks really good.
56:19
And thinking of Scream Queens, she knew how to like, give it
56:23
like weight, but like make it still look like it was easy for
56:27
her to pick up. Yeah, like that's that seems
56:29
like it would be difficult to do to give it the right amount of
56:32
weight. She pukes the blood because it's
56:34
not human blood, so it's still made her sick.
56:37
And then she gets in the bathtub and we see achy neck pulsating.
56:40
Yeah, Jacob is at. Bob and Carroll.
56:44
Yeah, getting having a conversation with them about.
56:49
Anne's hot now, and also she's a little assertive and I kind of
56:54
like the hot, but I don't like the assertive.
56:57
She's not just assertive. She's kind of being short with
56:59
and then being kind of rude to him too, which is not
57:02
necessarily uncalled for because he's been the same to her, but.
57:05
Yeah. Like it is like a drastic change
57:08
and. But the drastic change is like
57:11
her just letting him cut her off all the time.
57:13
So it's like, are you mad that she's being a little bit short
57:16
and curt, or are you mad that she's not letting you
57:18
steamroller, You know? And it's kind of one of those
57:21
that he needs to sit there and reflect on it for himself.
57:24
Yeah, that's true. You can be mad about both
57:26
things, but you need to actually sit there and acknowledge that
57:29
you are mad that you're not necessarily running the show
57:32
right now. Yeah, I guess.
57:33
I don't necessarily explore that here, but they talk about it.
57:37
It's like, yeah, ever since she met with Tom, things are going
57:39
weird. And then her his brother's like,
57:42
all right, you got to fucking like, confront that guy and you
57:44
got to, like, settle this shit. He comes home to a house covered
57:48
in rats and and like exploring her body at the window at the
57:52
behest of the master. Exploring her body, that's the
57:56
way to put it. She's going to town on herself.
57:59
I mean, you know what's happening?
58:01
Just out there in an exposed window and the whole
58:03
neighborhood's just watching. Yeah, it'd be funny if everybody
58:06
was just out there on the street.
58:09
So Jacob is preaching about if the husband is able to save the
58:13
wife interact too. It'd be funny.
58:16
He was like hates your wife. She wives are fucking worse,
58:20
Bros. And then I think Anne might not
58:22
be at church because they keep cutting in between this sermon
58:26
to her in the garden eating worms.
58:28
Yeah, she's not there. She goes to the dentist and the
58:31
dentist is like, hey, so where are you?
58:37
Have you been eating dirt? This Is Us with Italia with.
58:42
Italia. All of the time.
58:44
Like, we're like Talia. It looks like there's some dirt
58:46
in your water bowl and she's like it's probably Scout.
58:49
Don't know what you're talking about.
58:50
And then we're like, no, that's definitely dirt.
58:52
She goes, no, it's chocolate. You know, I love chocolate and
58:54
necessarily say for me guys. And we're like Talia, we saw you
58:58
over at the Dirt pile. Nah, that's not the dirt pile.
59:01
There's no dirt outside. Yeah, and that's exactly what
59:04
Anne's doing here, too. She's like, ah, stop it.
59:06
And then? And the dentist is like, also, I
59:08
know you don't have dental insurance and this bill is gonna
59:11
suck. Yeah.
59:13
All right. Now let's do a completely
59:15
optional cosmetic procedure and whiten your teeth.
59:19
Shouldn't this be concentrated purely on the teeth?
59:22
Right? Like, why is this blasting her a
59:23
whole fucking mouth? Like, that's a good way to get,
59:26
like, wrinkles around your mouth, yeah?
59:29
I mean, it just feels like it would like.
59:30
Or if you're a vampire like, burn your face or.
59:33
That too. Also, we didn't talk about the
59:35
fact that the dentist is like also you have new teeth growing
59:37
in and she's like what and the dentist's like it's fine.
59:40
Yeah, they're really sharp and they're not natural teeth, but
59:42
it's cool. Yeah, like it's fine.
59:44
Don't worry about it. Stop eating that dirt.
59:46
Stop eating dirt. Her face is burnt and she runs
59:49
out. Presumably also not paying the
59:52
bill, but I feel like it's probably a win for the dentist
59:56
office because like that's kind of a lawsuit situation.
59:59
Yeah, it is. I wouldn't pay for that shit.
1:00:02
No, I'd be like my face is burnt.
1:00:04
This is a legitimately upsetting moment, too.
1:00:06
Whenever. Her face is burnt, like she's
1:00:08
just got this ring of black around her mouth and you can
1:00:11
feel it. It just is like so bad.
1:00:14
And also especially considering, like she was doing like a
1:00:18
procedure that's like poor, like typical beauty standards.
1:00:23
And we'd seen her in the mirror earlier looking at her face.
1:00:25
It's not just like the physical pain, but also like the feeling
1:00:29
of being disfigured in that way. Yeah, So Jacob is looking for
1:00:34
Tom at the mill. He assumes that Tom just lives
1:00:37
there now. Yeah, he did.
1:00:42
He goes there, he sees the score and he's like, Yup, he just set
1:00:45
up a shop here, dude. It's out of town.
1:00:47
I guess he needed a place to stay.
1:00:48
And Oscar and Ellie, who are apparently stalking Jacob, are
1:00:51
also there. Yeah, what the fuck is this?
1:00:53
Why does everybody go to the fucking mill?
1:00:58
Well, when the town has a population of 10 and you have
1:01:02
Jacob's House, Bob's house, Amelia's house in the Mill.
1:01:06
Yeah, you gotta go to the mill, I guess.
1:01:10
So Oscar's like trying to like fight Jacob, which is just sad
1:01:16
in a lot of ways. But Amelia pops up and she's
1:01:19
like, we're done with you. And then she tells Jacob that
1:01:24
cause Jacob's like, Oh my God, let me help you.
1:01:26
And she goes, I've been helped. I have strength now, not fear.
1:01:32
And this isn't about God's love. This is about love for myself
1:01:35
and Jacob's like self love. Is this how Jacob feels about
1:01:39
Jacob? Other people feel that way about
1:01:41
themselves, not just about Jacob.
1:01:44
It's like I'm writing that shit down.
1:01:45
It's gonna be next week's service.
1:01:47
Love yourself like a Jacob. Yeah.
1:01:49
I'm not gonna give you any credit for it, but it seems like
1:01:52
maybe you're dead, right? OK.
1:01:54
Bye, Ilia. I feel like it would be so in
1:01:57
character for him to, like, talk about himself in third person,
1:02:00
like at the sermon. So Jacob had a great idea this
1:02:03
past weekend. Jacob thinks that everybody
1:02:05
should love themselves like Jacob.
1:02:07
And she's like, Oh yeah, so yeah, you're really good at self
1:02:09
love. And other people should do some
1:02:10
self love too, right, Jacob? No, no.
1:02:12
People should love themselves the way they love Jacob.
1:02:14
Yes. And she's like, may Jacob be
1:02:18
with you. So Jacob and Eli or Ellie run
1:02:22
out and Ellie like hits Amelia, so they have a chance to run
1:02:26
out. And she's like, we need to call
1:02:27
the cops. And he goes, I need to go check
1:02:29
out my wife. And Ellie's like, you're priest,
1:02:33
but whatever. Yeah.
1:02:34
And he's like not a piece I'm a minister by.
1:02:37
Meanwhile, over at their house, the neighbor sees Anne inside,
1:02:40
like seizing, kind of. And he runs in to check on her
1:02:45
and she feeds on him and Jacob walks in to a very messy
1:02:48
kitchen. Think about our last vampire
1:02:51
movie that we covered from dusk till dawn.
1:02:53
Yeah. When you know Seth walked in on
1:02:56
Richie with their little hostage in the in the hotel room.
1:02:59
It's kind of a similar situation, Yeah.
1:03:01
And she's like, this isn't me. And he goes, kind of looks like
1:03:05
you. And she was like, let me
1:03:05
explain. So she tells him the story.
1:03:08
Sheriff comes by asking about Ellie and Amelia and Oscar, and
1:03:12
he said, who's Ellie? And he goes, you may know her,
1:03:15
She skateboards around town. That's how you know she's a
1:03:17
troubled youth skateboarding. Smoking boobies and.
1:03:20
Skateboarding. You know it's a slippery slope.
1:03:23
Listen, weed in this universe is not the gateway drug.
1:03:26
It's the it's the final boss. Skateboarding's the gateway
1:03:30
drug. And Jacob got the disguise of
1:03:34
the century here. He's like a fucking bartender
1:03:38
with the towel over his shoulder to walk the blood.
1:03:41
Like, it worked out so perfectly.
1:03:42
He's like, yeah, So she tells and tells Jacob that she didn't
1:03:49
tell him what happened because she was ashamed.
1:03:50
And he's like, yeah, you probably should be whore.
1:03:54
She's like, okay. But I do actually feel really
1:03:57
good now that I've been bitten. So I kind of wanna talk about
1:04:00
this. It's a good change.
1:04:02
I feel powerful for once in my life.
1:04:05
And instead of him hearing that she's been feeling powerless, he
1:04:08
goes, well, you know this is unsustainable, right?
1:04:10
You can't just eat the neighbors, which is also and
1:04:14
then Jacob also assumes he knows the vampire lore of this
1:04:17
universe without fully vetting it.
1:04:18
And he's like, I'm going to kill the Master because I think
1:04:20
that'll free you. I I love that that's like the
1:04:23
immediate like. He's assuming she's like like
1:04:27
the half vampires from Lost Boys.
1:04:30
Yeah, like killing the Master. I bet he saw Lost Boys.
1:04:33
He was like, it's good 80s fun. It's PG13.
1:04:35
It's fine. Is it PG13?
1:04:39
I do not remember what that movie was rated.
1:04:41
I think it's R. Maybe.
1:04:43
I don't know. OK.
1:04:46
Anyway, Jacob is kind of jealous that Anne was chosen.
1:04:52
Because, he started saying. Like I just don't understand
1:04:54
where the master went for you. And she goes, seriously right
1:04:57
now Jacob with the with the jealousy.
1:05:00
And he goes, no, I'm jealous of Tom.
1:05:03
But I really want to kill that master.
1:05:06
So he's driving to the mill and he's like, you need to wait out
1:05:08
here. And she's like, I'm stronger
1:05:10
than you right now. And I feel like I can be a good
1:05:11
help. He goes, no, I think you won't
1:05:13
be able to control your blood less.
1:05:14
And she goes stop the car and he does and she rips off a piece of
1:05:17
offense and she's like, no, I have a steak.
1:05:19
So you can't tell me. I don't have a way to defend
1:05:20
myself. So she's like, I want us to be
1:05:24
equals. We need to go into this
1:05:26
together. And they see Amelia.
1:05:28
And Amelia is talking to them and is like you know, doing her
1:05:33
vampire like Jedi mind voodoo tricks and is trying to like
1:05:37
convince Jacob that she needs to, that he needs to spare her
1:05:41
and and that she's still scared and inside of there and Anne
1:05:46
kills her. Oh no, he doesn't kill her.
1:05:50
Jacob sticks her in the head. Because Anne.
1:05:52
No. Anne sticks her in the head
1:05:54
because he gets mad at her and says that he could have saved
1:05:57
her. Oh, that's right.
1:05:59
Yeah. Well, he also like, I love how
1:06:02
she's like, pleading her case and he just takes a little tiny
1:06:04
bottle, a bottle of holy water, and just splashes it on her
1:06:07
face, just like, melts her face. But she looks really gnarly,
1:06:11
Like they did a good job with that.
1:06:12
Yeah. OK, yeah, you're right.
1:06:14
And he's like, yeah, I could have saved her.
1:06:17
And he's mad. And he says that, you know,
1:06:19
maybe being controlled by the Master is your punishment for
1:06:22
kissing Tom. And she was like, you have never
1:06:25
once had to fight for me in our marriage.
1:06:26
I've always been here. And I think you have a problem
1:06:29
with the fact that now you have to fight for me.
1:06:30
And he goes, what a bet. And he just drives away without
1:06:32
her. She ends up hitchhiking home.
1:06:36
And when she gets there, she's looking for Jacob, who is
1:06:38
holding a knife to his own throat.
1:06:40
And the Master is controlling him.
1:06:42
She approaches and tells her that she's not who she was and
1:06:46
she is being dragged down by him and forces him to do a non
1:06:50
deadly cut which activate activates.
1:06:53
Anne puts her in vamp mode and she looks like she's about to
1:06:57
like, you know, gives the killing blow.
1:07:00
But instead she kisses him and they have sexy vampire sex.
1:07:04
I was confused when I watched this 'cause I thought that he
1:07:07
actually cut his throat and I thought that she saved him
1:07:11
somehow. It's.
1:07:12
A little nick. So it wasn't like, great, OK?
1:07:15
But it bled a lot and she smelled the blood and it kinda
1:07:18
sent her crazy because she's like hungry.
1:07:21
Yeah, well, this is the turn. Like, they fuck, they smoke some
1:07:24
weed and yeah, they're just having a good time.
1:07:27
They're apologizing for the shit that they've done for to each
1:07:30
other. And you think we're going to see
1:07:32
them grow together as a couple and things are going to be
1:07:34
great. And we're feeling really
1:07:35
optimistic that, you know, they'll they'll find a New
1:07:38
Balance in their lives. They'll save Anne from wanting
1:07:40
to drink blood all the time, and she'll still be empowered
1:07:42
afterwards. This is the turn though, that I
1:07:44
was talking about where like you would think, like everything is
1:07:47
building up to them, just like being like there's a wedge in
1:07:49
between them And then like it's just going to end up being them
1:07:52
against each other. But like, it takes a turn here
1:07:54
and they're like, OK, just fucking work together.
1:07:57
So they get a call and it's somebody from their church.
1:08:01
Maddie, she is dead. And Jacob's like, all right,
1:08:06
thank you Lord, for this bounty. And she's like, what?
1:08:08
He's like I. Eat up.
1:08:10
And they're taking her out to the car.
1:08:12
And this little girl's out there, they're like, oh, she did
1:08:15
some laundry for us. She goes, Nah, that's clearly
1:08:19
her wrapped up in a blanket. And Anne goes go inside and she
1:08:23
goes only if you tell me a swear word.
1:08:25
Oh, the chicken goes no. Yeah.
1:08:30
And Anne goes. How's this?
1:08:31
Fuck off. And she goes, I already know
1:08:34
that one. Yeah, this, this scene kind of
1:08:36
felt forced to me. I don't know, I I don't really
1:08:39
like it. It kind of makes me think of
1:08:42
Julian in Halloween 2018. A little bit without the
1:08:47
charisma that that kid had. Charisma right there.
1:08:50
This kid right here, it's like I've already heard that one.
1:08:55
And then neighbor next door also sees some stuff in the body in
1:08:58
the trunk and calls the cops. Sheriff Mike.
1:09:00
There's his name. That's where I wrote it down.
1:09:03
Jacob gets pulled over by Mike. So OK, I skipped this in my
1:09:08
notes. They get home and is going to
1:09:12
collect the blood. I wish she has something to
1:09:15
drink and Jacob is going to go check the mail while it's like
1:09:18
still dusk. Yes.
1:09:21
So that's how they're split up. Jacob gets pulled over by Mike
1:09:25
and Deputy Colton and gets arrested.
1:09:28
He they want to see what's in his suitcase and he goes, I have
1:09:32
to go see a dying person in the hospital and those are my spies.
1:09:35
Can I please go? And Mike's like Debbie.
1:09:37
Colton actually is leaving his probation soon and we need to
1:09:41
test his skills so. Yeah, also the girl from, like,
1:09:47
Evan, I can't remember her name, but the girl that's
1:09:50
skateboarding, That's a troubled youth.
1:09:52
Ellie. Yeah, Ellie, she told the cops.
1:09:54
Like, yeah, the reason we're checking you out is because she
1:09:56
said that you were there and you guys were attacked by vampires.
1:10:01
So we need to just kind of like, check your shit and they're
1:10:04
like, OK, can you pop the trunk? We really need to test it out.
1:10:08
So they open up his box. He's got a vampire slaying kit.
1:10:12
He's got Dracula and they're like, OK, and so they arrest
1:10:16
him, which is kind of weird, 'cause I don't feel like he
1:10:19
necessarily has anything super suspicious in there.
1:10:21
But they do also have like the reports of him carrying the dead
1:10:26
body. See, that's the thing.
1:10:27
Like it could have been like she had a wild imagination with the
1:10:32
entire thing and he is like pretending to.
1:10:34
Be she does smoke the dupes. Yeah, and he would have been
1:10:36
like saying, hey, I'm a Vampire Slayer, that's why I'm killing
1:10:39
this person, because it's like she's high and trying to trick
1:10:42
her. Listen, Buffy uses some of the
1:10:44
lamest excuses to cover up her vampire slaying, and all of
1:10:47
Sunnydale goes along with it. Yeah, so.
1:10:50
Or they're not buying it this time.
1:10:53
OK. So Bob and Carol arrived for
1:10:54
dinner. That's been scheduled and was
1:10:56
mentioned earlier. Earlier in the movie, Carol made
1:10:59
her lasagna. She didn't use spinach, though.
1:11:02
Spinach and lasagna sounds disgusting.
1:11:04
Oh no, it's amazing. OK.
1:11:06
With the riot, like seasoning and stuff, it's good.
1:11:09
OK? So they arrive and they see Anne
1:11:15
draining Maddie of her blood. Yeah, you know, Biggie.
1:11:19
Got her hung up like a fucking Texas chainsaw mass.
1:11:22
Yeah, yeah. So they call the cops, Carol's
1:11:25
waiting outside for them and, you know, see when they're
1:11:28
coming. And Bob is like on the phone
1:11:30
with the cops the whole time. And Carol at one point gets
1:11:34
grabbed. So Bob goes out there to look
1:11:36
for her and outside, and he goes outside to look for her.
1:11:41
And he brings Anne with him because he doesn't want her to
1:11:44
disappear, even though she's been a pretty like docile
1:11:46
hostage thus far. And outside they see Carol and
1:11:51
she's dead slash possessed. Bob gets bitten and the master
1:11:56
tells Anne that she chooses who she turns with care.
1:12:00
You know, the people that she actually wants to be with her
1:12:03
are picked for a reason, and everybody else is just a snack
1:12:07
or a toy. And then she asks Anne, what do
1:12:10
you want? It's your choice.
1:12:12
Do you want to be powerful? Do you want to live forever?
1:12:14
Do you want to go places you've never been?
1:12:16
Or do you just want to continue being Jacob's wife, hence the
1:12:19
name of the movie? Why you got to phrase it like
1:12:21
that, like just setting it up to be like, do you want to be like,
1:12:25
awesome and how all this shit or Jacob's wife?
1:12:28
Well, again, it's like the method of like drawing people
1:12:31
into a. Cult.
1:12:31
No, I get it. Yeah, I'm just saying.
1:12:34
It's just funny to phrase it that way.
1:12:36
But it is also a thing where a lot of times women are kind of
1:12:40
defined by, like, their domestic relations as opposed to anything
1:12:47
else in their lives. Yeah, like if you have kids,
1:12:50
your mother. First, I feel like it kind of
1:12:52
fits like with the name of the movie, even like because he,
1:12:55
like, always overpowers or overshadows any time that
1:13:00
they're around each other. Like nobody probably even knows
1:13:02
her name. They're like, Oh yeah, and
1:13:03
Jacob's wife. Yeah, Jacob and his wife, Yeah.
1:13:07
So the cops and Jacob arrive. Deputy Colton tries shooting at
1:13:11
the master and is not prepared for how fast a vampire is.
1:13:14
Which is just amateur hour. Like, really, he.
1:13:16
No, he lights her up. She just gets back up and she's
1:13:19
like, yeah, that doesn't work on me.
1:13:20
I'm a vampire. See.
1:13:22
I thought that she just like ducked down really fast and
1:13:24
like, got back up. No, you see, like actually go
1:13:26
through her. OK, so you know they're still
1:13:29
having this whole big climactic fight.
1:13:31
And then Jacob comes up behind and stakes the master and says
1:13:36
some like preachy shit. And then Anne is mag.
1:13:39
She was like, it's not your choice, it wasn't your choice to
1:13:43
make. And the sheriff turns to Colton
1:13:45
and says how are you going to write this one up.
1:13:47
And Deputy Colton goes domestic dispute nonviolent, and then
1:13:57
Sheriff Mike tells Jacob, I don't care what you do, just
1:14:01
resolve this by the morning. I want to know what went down in
1:14:06
the police car to where he convinced them.
1:14:08
Like, no guys for real vampire shits going down trust.
1:14:13
Me. Well, I think probably what
1:14:14
happened is they intercepted the call from the Fetter house.
1:14:19
And so they're like, OK, cool, let's just go see what your
1:14:21
wife's doing with a dead body. Priest or minister?
1:14:26
Sorry, he's very clear earlier on.
1:14:27
He's not a priest. Yeah, Minister.
1:14:30
So she the next morning they're sitting there and she suggests
1:14:33
selling the house and use that money to kind of travel.
1:14:36
And he goes, and how do we find a cure?
1:14:38
And she goes, well, we don't. I kind of like being strong and
1:14:40
I think we can find a way to live like this.
1:14:42
And he goes, but how do I trust you?
1:14:44
And she goes, well, how do I trust you?
1:14:46
And it cuts on like a very like 80s sitcom freeze frame where
1:14:50
she's like her teeth are starting to come out and he's
1:14:53
getting ready to lift a steak and we cut to kitten playing I.
1:14:56
Really like that ending? Yeah.
1:14:57
'Cause like uncertainty, like they need of them trust each
1:15:01
other. The truth is, there are
1:15:04
sometimes just things that you can't come back from That's
1:15:06
true. And they things with their
1:15:08
relationship had been boiling for a point.
1:15:10
And they, Jacob clearly hadn't realized it and Anne hadn't said
1:15:16
anything about it until it was too late and it became too late
1:15:20
in such a spectacular way that. Spectacular is certainly a word
1:15:24
for it. I also like how it just straight
1:15:26
up confirms. Like, yeah, that war about
1:15:28
killing the master isn't really yeah, gonna fly here.
1:15:31
That's just movie bullshit. Yeah.
1:15:33
Yeah, they don't only even touch on that.
1:15:35
Yeah. And then, yeah, it didn't.
1:15:38
It didn't just like that. I still love it.
1:15:41
I'm gonna give it an 8. Like I said, I think it's got a
1:15:44
lot of layers to it. It's got some humor.
1:15:46
It's got heart. I wish that they had the budget
1:15:49
and non COVID restraints to flesh it out even more, but I
1:15:53
think they do a lot and and it doesn't feel like it's it's full
1:15:56
98 minutes it it goes by very quickly.
1:16:00
It really does, yeah. Which is kind of surprising
1:16:02
'cause it doesn't feel like there's a ton happening
1:16:04
necessarily. There's really not.
1:16:06
Yeah. Like if you like put down on
1:16:08
paper, like look at my notes here.
1:16:09
This is like a short amount of notes I have.
1:16:11
But like I don't know, like what happened.
1:16:14
It just kind of happens like at a score pace.
1:16:17
But it doesn't make it uninteresting.
1:16:20
Like it's just. I don't know.
1:16:22
Yeah, it's a nice movie. I like it a lot too.
1:16:24
I'm keep in mind, 75. OK, no, 775.
1:16:27
I'll, I'll bump it up. All right.
1:16:29
And what would you change about it?
1:16:35
By the way, our new average is 7.875.
1:16:37
OK, I mean kind of like what I said before.
1:16:39
I want to explore more of the vampire stuff because we we got
1:16:43
a lot of like the relationship dynamic here, which I think
1:16:45
that's what the movie is mostly about.
1:16:47
But I feel like there was a lot of, like opportunities to have
1:16:51
fun with it also. And they did have fun, but they
1:16:54
could have had more fun if they had the budget I want.
1:16:57
I just want this movie to have more money, wanted to have more
1:17:00
resources because I feel like there was so much potential for
1:17:02
it to be. Absolutely.
1:17:04
Thing and they did an amazing job with what they had, but they
1:17:09
just, I don't know, they definitely had those
1:17:12
limitations. If it were not made during
1:17:15
COVID, I think it could have been a completely different type
1:17:19
of movie too. Yeah, like it could have lived
1:17:21
up to what its full potential was.
1:17:24
I also, I think so I want to jump ahead to the sequel because
1:17:27
I know we threw out some fun ideas.
1:17:29
I do kind of like the idea of maybe Jacob turning as well.
1:17:33
And I think the idea of him building his own army is also
1:17:35
him dealing with this new power dynamic in their relationship
1:17:37
where suddenly she is speaking out a little bit more and she
1:17:42
has gained like actual physical strength as well.
1:17:45
So I think that would be an interesting continuation of the
1:17:48
themes that have been explored in this movie.
1:17:51
See. Yeah, I think that's 'cause this
1:17:52
one is about him dealing with the fact that she has newfound
1:17:56
power that he has to, like, recognize and respect.
1:18:01
And then that one right there is like him having to respect her
1:18:05
as equals again. Like, take what he learned from
1:18:09
the past and like, apply it. Yeah, which it would be
1:18:13
interesting to watch. I think that that would be fun.
1:18:15
I would like to see them just like they talk about vanishing
1:18:18
and just traveling. I want to see that shit.
1:18:19
Yeah, I want to see what type of event because they have to keep
1:18:22
killing people. Yeah, I want to see a little
1:18:24
buddy road trip. Maybe he becomes a street
1:18:26
preacher. It could be like how From Dusk
1:18:29
till Dawn started with them. Just like going across the
1:18:31
country. Just like, you know, fucking
1:18:33
shit. Up they wind up with the titty
1:18:35
twister. They wind up at the titty
1:18:37
twister with Salma Hayek. Absolutely.
1:18:42
And they're like, oh shoot, you all containing the snakes.
1:18:45
Yeah, and Anna's like, damn, you're a boss bitch.
1:18:48
And someone has like, fuck, yeah, I know, but you're Barbara
1:18:51
Crampton, so you're also a boss bitch.
1:18:52
And then they're boss bitches together.
1:18:54
And then Jacob can bond with the priest dude.
1:18:58
Oh my God. It would be a great time, yeah.
1:19:02
Amazing. Just as that.
1:19:05
But I also just like it, being like its own standalone thing.
1:19:07
Yeah, just traveling along. Like having to like, learn how
1:19:10
to live with each other with this newfound power.
1:19:12
And like new found respect for each.
1:19:14
Other Yeah, like a rebuilding of their relationship.
1:19:16
Yeah, I think that they have potential there.
1:19:19
Absolutely, yeah. OK, so Talia, she was pretty
1:19:24
calm during this movie. She had a lot of respect for the
1:19:27
drama that was unfolding on the screen.
1:19:29
She really appreciated that. We had a vampire movie and no
1:19:32
dogs were killed. That is a good thing for her.
1:19:35
Yeah, so that was very, very exciting for her.
1:19:39
However, we did also have throwing up on the carpet, and
1:19:42
she knows that that's a problem. Yeah.
1:19:44
So I think she's gonna knock a point off for that.
1:19:47
OK, so I think she's gonna give this a 7 1/2.
1:19:50
OK, that's still a good, strong outing for Talia right there.
1:19:54
And Zoe spent the whole movie chilling on Lawrence Gordon, a
1:19:58
shark bed. So clearly this was a hit for
1:20:00
her as well. I think she's just like the
1:20:01
biting part because she has to bite people.
1:20:03
She was like, that's how you show affection.
1:20:05
She's like, I don't know why she's resisting the urge to bite
1:20:07
Jacob if she loves him. And the part where she gets
1:20:09
sharp teeth, she's like, oh, I have those two.
1:20:11
She's like Sam, she's like am IA Barbara Graham then you're.
1:20:15
Gonna go back outside and see Zoe in there like a red dress.
1:20:18
Yeah, and she's like, meow take me.
1:20:20
Out tinging. Zoe would say that, yeah.
1:20:23
And I would. OK, who did you relate to?
1:20:28
There's not a time to choose from, so we got to think
1:20:30
carefully. There's not.
1:20:31
And I think, I think, I guess I'm just gonna relate to Evan
1:20:37
because skateboarding. Which one's Evan?
1:20:41
Evan is Ellie's boyfriend. Perhaps you mean Oscar?
1:20:46
Oscar, Why did I think his name is?
1:20:49
I don't know. He looks like an Evan.
1:20:52
I think maybe you're still thinking go Chester Bennett or
1:20:54
whatever the fuck you called him, 'cause that was his
1:20:56
character's name and saw three. D The only names I know for sure
1:20:59
in this movie are Amelia and Jacob and Anne.
1:21:08
Leave that pause in. I want everybody to know how
1:21:12
long it took you. It's the fucking name of the
1:21:15
movie. Jacob's Wife.
1:21:17
I couldn't even get it. OK?
1:21:20
Oscar is who I relate to. No, no, no.
1:21:23
It's gonna be Ellie. Ellie because.
1:21:26
'Cause you also like to skateboard and would call the
1:21:28
cops if you saw murder. Exactly.
1:21:30
Yeah. Like the skateboarding took me
1:21:32
over and I tried skateboarding again as a 30, no wait, 20 year
1:21:37
old a few years ago and God damn it's not.
1:21:40
I'm not cut out for it anymore. I fucked my hand up hard.
1:21:44
I think I'm gonna relate to Carol because I like spinach in
1:21:49
my lasagna, but I don't always want to deal with putting
1:21:53
spinach in the lasagna. OK.
1:21:54
That's fair. So all right.
1:21:57
All right, so. New tagline.
1:22:00
Oh, new tagline. We gotta do that first.
1:22:01
We got, we got. It's not gonna be hard for us to
1:22:04
beat it. But then again we've hyped
1:22:06
ourselves up. Yeah.
1:22:07
So we've shatter on the. Tagline here.
1:22:09
Corner here. Jacob's wife, yeah.
1:22:16
Lord have. Mercy.
1:22:18
Lord, have mercy, I was going to say.
1:22:22
The life they've built together is at stake.
1:22:25
That's good too. See both of those are way better
1:22:29
than what. Either.
1:22:30
Of the ones before had See. OK, I like yours.
1:22:34
Let's do that. OK, Yeah, yeah.
1:22:37
OK, So now time for reviews. OK, so obviously because this is
1:22:43
a movie that seeks to empower women, a lot of the negative
1:22:47
reviews on IMDb where there's a bunch of neck views going, it's
1:22:50
a feminist movie and I don't like that Boo Boo.
1:22:56
I had a hard time finding one that like actually.
1:22:59
Called Jacob. And a lot of a hard time finding
1:23:04
something that actually talked about movie related things, OK.
1:23:08
Like, that's that's so upsetting that that's like you have to,
1:23:11
like, filter out all that bullshit.
1:23:14
OK, this is a 5 out of 10. OK, you had to go for a 5 for.
1:23:19
Yeah, it's because all the ones and threes were like, listen,
1:23:23
Barbara Cramp is hot. But like, why does she want to
1:23:26
be heard? Barbara Cramp is hot, but women
1:23:29
do be shopping one star out of 10.
1:23:34
OK, I enjoyed it. Enjoyed some of the concepts and
1:23:37
the camera work. Did have moments where it
1:23:39
conveyed the building annoyance felt by Anne.
1:23:41
Nobody is gorgeous or glamorous. Lie, and that helps give the
1:23:45
film a more relatable feeling. A few things strike me as better
1:23:48
fitting a horror comedy, but it wasn't too distracting.
1:23:50
With a little Polish, I think this could have been pretty
1:23:52
good, Maybe even great movie, but I still found it.
1:23:54
Archibald is is. OK.
1:23:56
I mean, I feel like it was like set out to be a horror comedy.
1:24:01
So, you know, I don't, you know, I mean, it did the thing that
1:24:04
you critiqued for there. But I agree that.
1:24:09
A bigger budget would give it more Polish, yeah.
1:24:11
I mean it. I think it's pretty well
1:24:14
polished for what they had. Like, it looks nice.
1:24:18
The cinematography is really good.
1:24:20
They did a great job making Jacob like, you feel that
1:24:23
disgust that she has for him. Yeah.
1:24:25
Like, I felt I was disgusted by him.
1:24:27
Yeah. But yeah, there was so much more
1:24:30
that they could have done with it.
1:24:31
And it's a shame. Yeah.
1:24:33
You know, you can't really fault them for like that.
1:24:36
Budget and COVID? Yeah, Yeah.
1:24:38
So you know it's I think if you're willing to accept the
1:24:42
movies constraints it's pretty good for what it is and and I
1:24:46
think you know the work people are able to do with the small
1:24:50
budget can go pretty far. I think maybe they had some
1:24:54
lofty expectations for what they wanted to do in terms of like
1:24:57
set dressing and stuff. So, like, it's noticeable how
1:25:00
thin the crowd is. It's noticeable how few settings
1:25:04
there are. Not in a way of like, oh, we're
1:25:06
just kind of keeping it contained to their house, but in
1:25:09
a way of like you want the town to be more a part of it.
1:25:12
But it couldn't be. And I think that they really
1:25:16
lucked out with the two people that they cast us the leads,
1:25:19
because like they fill some big shoes for such a short cast.
1:25:23
The two of them together play off each other so well that I
1:25:27
don't really have any issues with the small cast because of.
1:25:31
That and the interview that I read with Barbara Crampton
1:25:34
earlier, actually. They even talked about like some
1:25:36
of their Dreamcasting if they got a huge budget.
1:25:39
And it wasn't always necessarily going to definitively be Barbara
1:25:43
Crampton as Ann Feder. Really.
1:25:45
Yeah. Like she wanted to do it and she
1:25:47
was happy to do it. But if they'd gotten a big part
1:25:51
or a big budget, yeah. And they, you know, throughout
1:25:54
like Susan Sarandon, for example, she's like, I would
1:25:56
have been happy to tell that story as well.
1:25:58
OK, so I'm glad that she did this stuff cuz I feel like she
1:26:02
owned that shit. She did a great job.
1:26:04
I'm such a huge Barbara Crampton fan.
1:26:06
I'm a huge Bonnie Aaron's fan and I'm a big Larry Fessenden
1:26:09
fan. So this was a hit cast for me
1:26:12
and I like that Bonnie Aaron's got to talk and you could kind
1:26:16
of see some of her face even though she was covered and or
1:26:19
lock. Is she the nun?
1:26:21
Yeah. OK.
1:26:21
That's what I thought. Yeah, she's very good at.
1:26:23
She's got like a very good face for that type of stuff.
1:26:26
Right there she's. And she's got a presence, too.
1:26:29
She does, yeah. Bonnie Aaron's is all.
1:26:31
Bonnie Aaron's and Barbara Kramson are both boss bitches
1:26:33
and not using bitches in a derogatory way.
1:26:35
But I'm like, fuck yeah, you go bitch.
1:26:38
Not a bitch eating crackers, but like, you go bitch.
1:26:40
Yeah. Yeah.
1:26:41
All right, cool. Now I know we have quite a few
1:26:44
listener reviews for this quote UN quote.
1:26:46
Obscure film. Again, thank you guys for
1:26:48
proving me wrong. Thank you for proving him wrong.
1:26:50
I'm. Happy to be corrected, honestly,
1:26:53
especially in the way that it was.
1:26:54
It was just so funny because we're sitting at the bar eating
1:26:58
dinner last night. And I watched him write it up
1:27:00
and I was like, I won't say anything.
1:27:02
He can write what he wants to write.
1:27:03
And then we got home and you were like, wow, a lot of people
1:27:06
really like this movie. I was like, yeah.
1:27:08
At the bar, you as soon as I hit post, you went, oh, obscure.
1:27:12
It's like, OK, yeah, I think it is like it's a shutter exclusive
1:27:16
movie. It has a very limited audience.
1:27:19
I let you post it before I said anything.
1:27:21
Though I know, but you did say something you didn't.
1:27:23
You didn't bite your tongue 100% until we got home and we saw the
1:27:26
reception like you and me. Like, oh, obscure.
1:27:30
OK, well, we do. We have a shit.
1:27:31
Oh my God, we have even more. Yeah, they just kept coming in.
1:27:35
If you don't hear your review, it's because of our recording.
1:27:39
OK, we had a lot come in while we were recording even.
1:27:43
So, OK, I'll just read what I got here.
1:27:48
We'll start out with our own Instagram review.
1:27:50
OK. Which is from the Horror Fried
1:27:52
podcast, OK, They say Barbara Crampton is an actual queen.
1:27:56
Yes. Yeah, I just responded to them.
1:27:59
Preach. Yeah, man.
1:28:03
She fucking kills it. She was perfect in this role.
1:28:05
I'm glad that she did end up getting the part.
1:28:07
I don't think I could see anybody else playing this other
1:28:09
than her with how she did with it.
1:28:11
Yeah, no, she she served. Yeah, OK, over on Twitter.
1:28:17
So our first review is from Wilson Gill.
1:28:23
He posted his letterbox review. OK.
1:28:26
Says brilliant direction from Stevens, highlighted by arguably
1:28:30
Barbara Crampton's best performance is a astounding take
1:28:34
of an older minister's wife finding herself and demanding
1:28:37
the recognition she deserves. I I think she she pulls from
1:28:43
years of experience in a very good and realistic way.
1:28:46
I yeah, she, she probably did like take some, like, personal
1:28:50
shit into this role right here. You.
1:28:52
Know. No, she definitely did, Did she?
1:28:53
Talk about that. Yeah, OK, I read all that at the
1:28:56
BNA. OK.
1:28:56
Yeah, that's right. Alright, Steven Cunningham, I'm
1:29:00
sorry if it's coming across like, I'm talking like, I'm like
1:29:03
Jake, I'm like, oh, did you say that?
1:29:05
Sorry, It's just sometimes I forget I I swear to God.
1:29:08
I know, I know. You forget stuff.
1:29:10
That's why I was like, teasing. OK.
1:29:13
All right. Steven Cunningham says it was
1:29:16
one of my favorite movies of that year.
1:29:17
Yeah, yeah, that was a pretty strong year for horror movies.
1:29:21
2/20/21 was stellar. That's with the Terrifier 2. 22
1:29:26
was with WAS. What you're thinking of is.
1:29:28
It, yeah. OK.
1:29:30
Well then 21 was pretty solid too.
1:29:32
It's 21. We didn't go to a ton of movies
1:29:34
in theaters because of COVID. I think we saw Spiral in
1:29:40
theaters. Yeah, that's true.
1:29:42
And I think we Halloween kills and Halloween kills.
1:29:44
And I don't think we went to another movie until 20/22.
1:29:47
No, but we watched this one. Yeah, we watched this.
1:29:50
It was on shatter, though. See, that was the thing we had a
1:29:52
lot of, like at home Movies premieres, which I thought was
1:29:55
awesome too. Kevy Kev says.
1:29:58
Enjoy that a lot. Barbara Crampton Suede and.
1:30:02
See what you did. And figuratively, yeah, she
1:30:05
fucking killed it in this movie, Tattooed horror says.
1:30:09
I thought it was great. Chris Creature says One of my
1:30:12
fave films from that year, and the soundtrack is incredible.
1:30:16
100% agree. I love the soundtrack.
1:30:18
Yeah, we didn't even talk about the soundtrack, but it did a
1:30:20
great job of building the mood. Yeah, every song they picked, I
1:30:24
was like, this is correct, this is correct, this is correct.
1:30:26
And again, the surprise of Kitten at the end.
1:30:30
The first time we watched it I like jumped up on the edge so.
1:30:33
Good credits song. Justin Helmer says it's great.
1:30:36
Barbara Crampton is, as always, a damn treasure.
1:30:38
Larry Fessenden takes a character that could very be
1:30:41
very one-dimensional and plays him with real empathy.
1:30:44
The last shot as a showstopper. Yeah.
1:30:47
Yeah, I mean, they both carry this movie hard with, you know,
1:30:51
it just being mostly them getting screen time and that
1:30:55
ending shot is amazing. I love it so much.
1:30:57
Yeah, this movie would not be successful if they didn't
1:30:59
perform the characters the way they did.
1:31:01
Yeah, exactly. And we have one threads review.
1:31:05
OK, OK. Leaves, Cobwebs says.
1:31:10
I thought it was great. Not only a clever twist on a
1:31:12
vampire story, but it depicted A muddled, aged woman coming into
1:31:16
her power. Maybe it was middle-aged and
1:31:19
it's muddled. I think it was probably an
1:31:22
autocorrect. Yeah, probably middle-aged.
1:31:24
Yeah, middle middle-aged woman coming into her power.
1:31:27
Yeah. Yeah.
1:31:28
I mean, yeah, it's cool. I it's a cool transformation.
1:31:31
Like the whole thing, The whole process of her, like discovering
1:31:34
her powers and just like kind of owning shit is really
1:31:38
entertaining. Absolutely.
1:31:40
OK. All right.
1:31:41
So that's it for our listener reviews.
1:31:43
Thank you guys so much for throwing those out there.
1:31:45
We always appreciate getting those.
1:31:46
Released. Yes.
1:31:47
And I'm so glad to see a lot of love for this movie.
1:31:50
I love this movie a lot. I actually I dressed as Anne
1:31:52
Feder for Halloween one year so it's I'll try and remember to
1:31:55
post a fix. Yeah, we gotta post those, cuz
1:31:57
you killed it that year. Yeah, even like Barbara Crampton
1:31:59
and the director were like, my God, it's amazing.
1:32:03
Had a lot of fun with it. OK, so that's it for this weeks
1:32:07
episode. Everybody next week.
1:32:10
Next week is actually our Patreon voted one, and it's
1:32:16
Would you rather. We have talks plenty about this
1:32:20
movie in other movies, so now it's time for us to actually
1:32:24
talk about it on the show and I'm excited.
1:32:26
It is for free on Tubi, but you can also currently watch it on
1:32:29
Hulu, AMC Plus, Sling TV, Prime, YouTube TV Premium, or you can
1:32:33
rent it from YouTube or Google Play.
1:32:35
Absolutely. Watch it.
1:32:37
So it's it's a very good movie. It's got Jeffrey Collins.
1:32:40
It's got Brittany, Brittany Snow.
1:32:44
Thank you. I wanted to say Brittany Murphy,
1:32:45
you know, I knew that wasn't correct.
1:32:46
It's got Crabman from My Name Is Earl.
1:32:48
It has. Ricky.
1:32:51
From Turk Boys Ricky's speaking No Rob Wells, This is actual
1:32:55
name. Yeah, Rob Wells, which is not
1:32:57
spelled the way you expect Wells to be spelled.
1:33:00
WELLS. I think it's got an extra E in
1:33:03
there. Or maybe it's Rob that isn't one
1:33:06
of his names. Rob is 2B's I.
1:33:07
Think. Yeah.
1:33:07
OK, well, I was gonna say one of his names that should be a
1:33:10
fairly straightforward name. Is not straightforward.
1:33:13
Fucking Canada, man. Yeah, it's got a sneaky.
1:33:17
They have universal health care. They can afford to throw extra
1:33:19
names. Yeah, extra letters in their
1:33:21
name. So yeah, you know, it's out
1:33:24
there to be watched in some easily accessible areas.
1:33:29
So we recommend watching that one, 'cause we love that movie
1:33:31
and it's a lot of fun. Oh, it's got Sasha Grey in it
1:33:34
too. Sasha Grey, WE.
1:33:35
Didn't talk about that. Yeah.
1:33:37
And a character named Travis. Who gets?
1:33:42
The terrible fate kicked out of him.
1:33:44
Oh man, yeah. So.
1:33:47
So yeah, watch that one, yeah. It's it's gonna be.
1:33:49
It'll leave you feeling sad. Yes, it will.
1:33:52
That's the point of it. It's a depressing movie, but
1:33:54
we're we're going to make it as fun as we can, we promise.
1:33:57
Yeah, we always do. We made Jacob's life a lot of
1:34:00
fun, even though it's like a lot of sad stuff going on in it.
1:34:03
It's a lot of fun too though. That's kind of it's got some
1:34:06
great fun moments in it. Yeah, they made it a little bit
1:34:08
easier. Would you rather it's a little
1:34:10
bit more difficult to make fun though I.
1:34:11
Think we can. I think we can do it.
1:34:13
If we made martyrs fun, we can make Would you We can do this.
1:34:18
Shit, I believe martyrs is where we originated.
1:34:19
The milk theory. No, you've.
1:34:21
Had no you've. Had the milk theory going since
1:34:24
before we even had the podcast going.
1:34:26
Have I? You have.
1:34:28
I just remember we used that to confirm that they were indeed
1:34:32
terrible people because of the Milk scenario.
1:34:36
That's true. Yeah.
1:34:37
OK, so that's it. So watch out, we.
1:34:42
We already plugged our Patreon, but we do want to go ahead and
1:34:45
thank our patrons. Yeah, we've got Joe Freakatron,
1:34:47
as is his name, Amber Michael and a brand new patron this
1:34:51
month, we're Zombie. Welcome to the Welcome to the
1:34:54
Bubby crew. Yeah, Bubbies.
1:34:57
Thank you guys so much. We really appreciate the support
1:34:59
you guys have. If you want to support us in
1:35:01
other non financial ways, you can do so by fault.
1:35:04
Like, whatever you're listening to the podcast on, you can
1:35:06
follow us, read us, and review us.
1:35:08
You don't have to write a full review if you don't want to, but
1:35:10
you can follow and rate, and that helps us a lot.
1:35:13
Tells the algorithms that we're worth listening to.
1:35:16
And then we also have a shooting of social media that you can
1:35:20
find us on because it's 2024 and that's what you have to.
1:35:22
Do we are on Twitter at least Faith Pod.
1:35:25
We are same handle on Blue Sky or Blue Ski as Jesse likes to
1:35:29
call it. We are on Threads and Instagram
1:35:32
least favorite scary movie podcasts.
1:35:33
And we have a website What's your least favorite scary
1:35:35
movie.com? And if you would like to e-mail
1:35:38
us, we have that as well. It's least favorite
1:35:40
scarymovie@gmail.com. Indeed it is.
1:35:43
So we would like to thank you guys again for being here.
1:35:47
We appreciate you all. We have a lot of fun doing this,
1:35:50
and I think some of the most fun that's come out of it is the
1:35:52
interactions we've had with people just talking about
1:35:54
movies. Yeah, it's great.
1:35:56
So we look. We love horror.
1:35:57
We we love that other people love horror too.
1:36:00
Thank you guys for being here. We will see you guys next week.
1:36:03
All right. Until then, Bye.
1:36:18
I just the the the what's the word perceive Private.
1:36:26
I don't remember my English. OK, I cut this so my mom doesn't
1:36:29
get mad at me. OK, that's a good.
1:36:34
Read.