Latest / Caught on the Mike... / Sharna Burgess- Dancing With The Stars, Old-ish Podcast

Transcript

Sharna Burgess- Dancing With The Stars, Old-ish Podcast · Caught on the Mike...

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Disclaimer, the views and opinions expressed in this program are those of the speakers and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of any entities they represent.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: Listener discretion is advised.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: My next guest requires very little introduction.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: You have seen her on multiple seasons of dancing stars, including being the winner of season 27, or maybe you have seen her as a judge of the Australian version of the same show.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: She has just recently finished filming her first movie, a movie called Three Stellar Siggs.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: It is a horror flex, and she's one of three hosts of a show called Old It, alongside my friends Randy Spelling and Brian Austin Green.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: Sharda Burgess joins me on the podcast today, and we have a fantastic conversation rooted in the subject of family and optimism.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_00: Ladies and gentlemen, this is Caught on the Mic.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: Ladies and gentlemen, I have a fantastic guest with me today.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: We are going to complete the Oldish trilogy.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: We saved the best for last.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: You might know you might know my next guest from Dancing with the Stars, including being the winner of season 27.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_00: And she is also one of three hosts of Oldish, alongside Randy Spelling and my friend Brian Austin Green.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: She's doing a movie.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's called Three Killer Pigs.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: We're going to talk about all of this.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: Sharna Burgess, how the heck are you?
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so good.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_02: Save the best for last.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_02: I hope Randy and Briar are listening to this episode.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_02: Um, that's so cute of you.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much.
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_02: We'll never tell them.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_02: We'll never tell them.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_02: Um I'm good.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_02: I am I've had, you know, 2024 was a crazy year, man.
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_02: There was lots going on there, I think, for everyone.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_02: And uh, as you said, shot my first movie, which was wild.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_02: And I say first because it's something I've been manifesting for a really long time.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_02: Deep passion for storytelling.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_02: And uh have honestly kept it pretty quiet because, you know, work quietly, keep things close until they are actually happening and manifesting.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it was the coolest experience um and very surreal, and just felt so right and aligned.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_02: And yeah, 2024 was wild, man.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_02: So much happened for everyone.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_02: It was an incredible year and also a really hard year, you know, I think for everybody.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_02: So we're in 2025.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_02: It started off pretty intensely over here in Los Angeles, you know.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_02: We uh were hoping for it to cool down quite literally, um, you know, and and to go a little smoother the first three weeks.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, you guys spent the the last week of the year in the Bahamas on a trip.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_02: First week of the year, actually.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: Where were you?
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_02: Well, first week we went to uh Jamaica at an incredible resort out there, and it was amazing.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_02: We had such a beautiful time.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_02: It was my gift to Bri for Christmas because 2024, we were both traveling so much and not with each other either.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_02: So we were constantly on separate schedules, and it felt like we'd get pockets of time with each other, but just not as much as normal.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_02: And we were coming around to Christmas presents, and we have all the things, like literal things.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_02: We have everything that we need.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_02: What am I gonna do?
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_02: A cooler piece of jewelry, another watch.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_02: Like it doesn't really mean anything, but what we needed was time with each other, and we hadn't had a vacation, just the two of us, since well before game.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and so it felt like that was something we needed to do.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_02: Because in the beginning of our relationship, we always talked about wanting adventure and new experiences with each other and um and those sorts of things, and we just haven't prioritized that for ourselves because parent life.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_02: So it felt like the right time.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_02: Thank God we did, by the way, because after that week, we came back to literal Armageddon in Los Angeles.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_02: We were flying into it.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_02: It was the uh just at the end of the first day of the fires, I believe.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_02: We were glued to the news whilst in Jamaica, of course, worried about our own home, our kids, our family, uh all of our friends in the Palisades.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_02: Is it gonna get to us?
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_02: And it was just really unsettling.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_02: And that entire week was it's it's still awful in LA.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_02: We're still recovering.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_02: But that first week of it was just the the friends of ours and the stories we were hearing and them being displaced and losing everything.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it was really heartbreaking.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_02: We had one scary day where we thought we were going to uh have to evacuate, and I went through the whole um overwhelming but like paralyzing feeling of what do I do?
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_02: What do I pack?
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_02: I'd never had to be in that situation before.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_02: It was it was crazy to me.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_02: And I got it together to do all the important things.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_02: We rallied, the birth certificates, the hard drives, the you know, computers and the thing, all the photo albums, the stuff people tell you to go for.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_02: And then I went to pack a bag for myself just for clothing, and I could not figure out what underwear I wanted to put in there.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_02: It was just so crazy for me to try and figure out what I wanted for myself because it was like decision fatigue.
• 5:33
  SPEAKER_02: So we yeah, we had one scary day of needing to evacuate, um, not mandatory, but it the fire was getting closer and closer to us, and we were like, okay, it's time to pack a bag just in case.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_02: And it was really overwhelming.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_02: I found it very paralyzing.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_02: I've never had to prepare for an evacuation before, never been a part of a something like that.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_02: And I've I was like stuck in place of all the things that I thought I needed to do and trying to figure out all the things I needed to take.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_02: And so get it together, rally, all right, make smart decisions, photo albums, hard drives, birth certificates, the usual.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_02: And then it came down to me having to pack a bag for myself.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_02: And it's like I couldn't figure out what pair of underwear to put in my bag.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_02: Like decision fatigue kicked in and I was got I was done.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_02: It was like I could not figure out what sweatpants I wanted to take.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_02: It didn't matter that like I was just overwhelmed with it.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_02: But we're so lucky because by the end of that afternoon, our evacuation order got lifted.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_02: We were in our home, we still have power because our power lines are in the ground, and we were eating pizza that evening.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm sitting there eating pizza with mad guilt because so many friends have lost everything, still being evacuated, pets abandoned because they couldn't find them, get to them in time.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_02: Like the flames were at their front door.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: Heartbreaking stuff, man.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_02: And here I am eating pizza in my home, and it felt really yucky, to be honest.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: I get that.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: I get that.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, I'm here in the Midwest, and I even made a little uh one of my mini TikTok videos about it where I was just like, I will pitch podcast episodes to people two or three times a day, but that whole day in the from the Midwest watching it all unfold, I was just like, this feels gross.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I I know I can poll guests from anywhere in the United States, but just emailing anybody to talk about podcast appearances just absolutely feels disgusting right now.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: So I was just like, I'm like, oh, I'm maybe I'll just take the week off.
• 7:24
  SPEAKER_00: And that's that's exactly what I did.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I and I'm sure there's a lot of people that have that reset going on themselves.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_02: So I do branding deals on social media, and I had so many lined up for the start of the year, and I was like, no to any of them.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_02: But the and even the brands were like completely insensitive, not the right time, we're not doing this.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_02: Let's keep a like a temperature check here and there and see when it feels right to get back into it, especially being so close to it.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it was like this, we're not doing any of that.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_02: We had to do a post with a resort that we were at in Jamaica, and even they're a bit more removed, right?
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_02: In Jamaica, and they kept checking in when we could do it.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, not now.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not gonna post my fucking vacation in Jamaica with what's happening right here.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_02: That's crazy to me.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but everyone was pretty understanding, I think, collectively, not just Los Angeles, but America felt that because the images, as chilling as they were, were there's no exact, they weren't filtered, you know what I mean?
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_02: That was uh there was no to nothing to make it more dramatic.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_02: It they were that bad.
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_02: The flames were that big, it was spreading that quickly, people were that distraught, it looked like Armageddon.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_02: And now you see the mess in it with just cars completely melted and and done along streets, along homes and everything is it looks like a third world country, it looks like a war zone.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_00: And it's hard to fathom that.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, the closest thing, and it's not even a natural disaster, but the closest thing that I could associate it with was those beginning weeks of the pandemic in 2020.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like, and and I think even you and I kind of had an exchange last week week where we talked about how days felt like months or years in a very similar accord in that sense.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, um trying to look through windshields versus rear view mirrors, it's like being optimist, optimistic, and thinking that you know everything's gonna rebuild and the good faith of the world is gonna hopefully save the day.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we we have to.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_02: There is no other choice but to look that look at it that way.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_00: I want to hit back on something you briefly mentioned about your trip to Jamaica because it warmed my heart to hear it, because my wife and I have this similar arrangement where we've decided on our anniversaries, we no longer do gifts.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: It's all about experiences.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like we'll figure out what the theme of that anniversary year is, and we'll try and tie some sort of experience with that.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: How did you guys land on something along those lines?
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: Or how did you land on that with this vacation?
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_02: Um, you know, it was in the very beginning of our dating life with each other, where it was always wanting to keep adventure in our lives.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_02: And I think it's really a conversation because both Brian and I can very easily be homebodies.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_02: You know, we can very easily get comfortable in our space.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_02: I can st I can hermit crab it like nobody else.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_02: Like just be with my people in my home, and that's it.
• 10:33
  SPEAKER_02: Like that's me.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_02: Then I do pop out of my shell every now and then.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_02: I'm like, oh, what am I missing?
• 10:39
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I haven't done other things.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_02: And it's like suddenly I want these experiences that I haven't stretched myself to do.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_02: And so it was really more of not just like we desire it so much, we're hungry for it, let's go.
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_02: But a almost a promise of like we need to keep these things in our life too, because in there's such enriching experiences as couples.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_02: And it was, there was a Jay Shetty podcast, and now I'm gonna forget the four things that he said.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_02: But to keep the relationship, a marriage, a lifelong partnership moving forward, people forget to have.
• 11:10
  SPEAKER_02: One of them was new experiences with each other.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and that I found to be really incredible because it's like, yeah, you get in life and it can be the day-to-day, it can be a little groundhog, and you can love your life.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_02: It can be spectacular.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_02: But if you don't have new experiences and suddenly you're the couple at the dinner table that have just talking about the kids or the mundane stuff and not the exciting things that bond you.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_02: Um, another one was entertainment, was making sure you it's not just the same TV shows, but going to source others forms of entertainment with each other, go to a Broadway show or whatever.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_02: Um learning a new skill with each other, like learn to scuba dive with each other, or learn to, you know, learn to paint with each other.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_02: So all those things I found to be really, really interesting.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_02: And experiences was one that uh we we talked about a lot in the beginning.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_00: I absolutely love that because it can really um be easy to get kind of lost in the minutia of dealing with kids every day as parents and stepparents, because that's something else we have we have in common, is that you know, we're a blended family in my household.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: So we both have been married before, we have kids from prior marriages.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: So that is its own like layer of difficulty and has kind of like a difficult barrier to entry that it makes it really easy to lose sight of the importance of bonding and that relationship with your partner.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_00: So I I love hearing things like this.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_02: I think you make such a good point too.
• 12:46
  SPEAKER_02: Like step-parent life and blended families, it takes work.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you're not just balancing the dynamics of your immediate in your home, you're considering the dynamics of other people elsewhere, the other parents, the other kids, if there are kids in that other home.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_02: Like in what you're constantly thinking and managing and balancing all of these other dynamics, so you 100% forget to take care of just the two of you together.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_02: That's like long gone and forgotten because you you prioritize your kids' happiness and health and wholeness over your own.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_02: We do that as parents too.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_02: And then suddenly you're like, oh, I'm just feeling like that's something is missing.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_02: And we don't ever want to get to that point, right?
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_02: And we certainly get to our points where we're like, damn, I feel like I haven't even seen you in months, but we've been in the same house.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_02: Like, when did we last connect?
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_02: And so we we always are very open and transparent with each other when we're like feeling that way and we make time for each other and uh and do those sorts of things and to make it meaningful too.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_02: It's not like fine, let's just go to dinner.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_02: Like that doesn't work for anyone.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_02: That also becomes boring and and numb at some point.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_02: It's these new experiences, doing fun things with each other.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_02: It just makes such a difference in your life.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_02: And so it really helps us.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: For sure.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: You know, kind of taking all of this into consideration and some of the topics that you guys cover in Oldish, is blended families something that you've a topic you guys have attacked yet or considered attacking?
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_02: We talked um on our very, very first episode of Oldish, we talked about co-parenting.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it got a little explosive and headlines everywhere and all the things because you know things can be taken out uh in certain ways.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_02: We've learned in in our podcasting journey in how to um better approach subjects and not make them so personal.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_02: It felt like at the time we were talking about just our own situation, which didn't ever really feel good in for us in the world of podcasting.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_02: We don't want to just be here to broadcast our life, but we'll totally share experiences if it's helpful for one another.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_02: And we certainly didn't want the podcast to come off like we're trying to poo-poo anybody or like throw shade at anyone.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_02: It was just sharing experiences.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_02: But of course, headlines can get written a certain way about those experiences, and it was like, oh, that feels yucky.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_02: So I don't know if we've even done a full blended family episode, but we've absolutely talked when it's come to what we've had doctors, parents, uh, sorry, doctors or nutritionists or whatever.
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_02: We talk about the balances of having a blended family, whether it's different nutritional boundaries from different homes, you know, all these different things in the way that you approach them.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_02: But I think it'd be really interesting to do a blended family episode.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_02: I have people ask me all the time, and I'm sure you do too, how did you do it?
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_02: How did you step into being a step parent?
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_02: You seem to have made it work so well, it looked so easy.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_02: What did you do?
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it's like, God, I don't even know how to answer those questions yet, you know.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_02: But I think at some point I want to figure out how to answer them.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_02: But the truth is day to day, day by day, I'm still figuring it out, still balancing it.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_02: As these kids grow and age up and their hormones change and we're in different places and dynamics change in the homes because they always do everything ebbs and flows.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_02: I'm still figuring it out day by day.
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_02: And it's it's a lot.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_02: Again, dynamics to balance and things to think about.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_02: It's a lot.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: Well, yeah, and that's exactly what I was gonna say because it's something I've considered a topic I've considered approaching on my own show, but it's such a tightrope walk because you do want to be respectful to the other household.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_00: But like, you know, if if there's any any tinge of conflict that people can suck away from that, they're gonna exploit that.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: And even if you're trying to be helpful, and it's the absolute hardest thing to talk about.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's why there's not more content about blended families out there, because it's something that catches my eye anytime I'm scrolling social media is when I'm talking or hearing a uh mental health expert talk about that scenario because it is something I think that's I think challenging for more people than you know the commoner will realize.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_02: It's um we also have to consider for us when these things get exploited that our kids, while they don't have access to the internet today, will have access to the internet, and these headlines are gonna come up and they're gonna read them and they won't understand in the moment that they're uh an edited transcript or a piece of something without context or you know the nature of it at the time.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: They're just gonna read these things.
• 17:30
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't ever want that because is there conflict?
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_02: Sure, because we're human beings, there's stuff to work out.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't mean anyone hates each other or even deeply loves each other.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_02: We we work together to make it work, and sometimes there's friction and sometimes there isn't.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_02: But that is just a natural part of parenting, even within your own home.
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_02: Do you know what it means?
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't have to be a blended family when you are raising human beings.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_02: There is always going to be differing opinions and things, and it and it takes a village, and you have to have communication and put the kids first.
• 18:06
  SPEAKER_02: And at all times, it is about creating the environment that is best suited to help raise good humans.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: So you guys have such a wide range of kids at different ages in the household.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: So is there a certain age group that you're finding is easier to navigate or harder to navigate than another?
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_02: Uh the newborn state.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_02: When they're squishing, they don't move and all they do is sleep in me.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_02: Bring me, take me back to the squish stage, I'm telling you.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um you know, no, I don't think there is.
• 18:41
  SPEAKER_02: I'm uh dreading teenage years um and getting glimpses of it with preteens at the moment, and I'm like, oh, that's a little bit triggering.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_00: Um your friend Mike is here to tell you to dread it.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: Um so we've got four.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 19:01
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_00: So my stepdaughters are twin girls, they're seniors in high school.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: My biological daughter is also a senior in high school.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_00: So we've got three girls that are all the same age.
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I will tell you the hardest of the four of them is the 15-year-old son.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_02: Is it really?
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_02: God help me.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_02: God help me.
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_02: Like, what have you done?
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_02: I'm like, I don't know what to do with that information.
• 19:25
  SPEAKER_02: I here I was thinking girls would be the hardest because, well, let me tell you, I was a horrendous teenager.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: See, I didn't grow up with sisters.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: So I I never had sisters, I only had brothers.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_00: So, like, I thought it would be harder for me, and it was actually a lot easier.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_02: That's amazing.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_02: I am, oh my God, the testosterone levels in this home is just through the roof.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm very outnumbered here, Mike.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I'm saying to Bri, like, we need I need a girl, you know, we need to plan in a girl at some point.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_02: I need some estrogen up in this house.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um, but yeah, like I, you know, something I'm adjusting to because I'm an only child and you know, grew up only girl, only child.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_02: Um I'm adjusting to the way that boys roughhouse and play.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_02: And I also am reading that it's necessary for them to experience that, right?
• 20:17
  SPEAKER_02: And for me, I'm like, you know, the it gets very physical sometimes.
• 20:21
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not saying they go to go to punches and blows with each other, but like boys play rough man.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_02: First of all, boys just have a death wish.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_02: Even Zayn at two and a half years old just thinks he can fly off the damn couch, and I'm having a heart attack every time I look at him.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and he, of course, he's got older brothers, so he's learning all the things and he's watching all the things, and I constant heart attacks every day.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_02: Um, the quiet is what scares me the most.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_02: Like, if it's all quiet, I'm I'm panicking, running through trying to find everyone.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_02: Then I don't know what the hardest age would be because I find that as they grow, new things come up.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_02: And as they grow and they're um what I find so interesting is their personalities are developing.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_02: So they're developing all of these traits, but in these little tiny bodies that they are, that's just so much and it's so big, and they don't know how to regulate them or manage them.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_02: I have one kid that loves rules and structure and process and fairness, but the way that that comes across is being a little bit of a rat at school sometimes, telling on people, and a little bit of a dictator in telling people what to do.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: And so we're managing that right now, that they can be beautiful qualities of the things that he um finds important that you know that that he is not a parent and he's not a teacher, and he's not to to push those things onto other people.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_02: Like sometimes you got to know when to just be a friend and a mate, you know, and weigh up whether it's really your business to step in or not.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_02: And that's a big one.
• 21:51
  SPEAKER_02: Is it my business or is it not my business?
• 21:53
  SPEAKER_02: Is someone in danger or are they not in danger?
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_02: So managing those things, it's like I'm constantly I'm on the the Nurse Becky like app doing her.
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know if you know Nurse Becky, but the parenting courses she's got, like looking up different ones every month, I feel like, for different qualities that are or things that I'm trying to figure out how to um parent better, you know, and it's it's so interesting.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_02: But I am terrified of the teenage years because emotions and things are big now.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_02: I can't imagine how that goes when you have three teenagers in a house at one time.
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_02: Like that's you have that right now.
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_02: That's so big.
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like we're gonna need a bigger house.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_02: We have a big house, but I'm like, how they're gonna get bigger.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: That's what we did.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: We like we moved into a much bigger house like two years ago just because of that reason.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: But the weird thing about that is is they've all got to this age where they're too cool to hang out at home and too cool to hang out with mom and dad.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_00: So that's almost more heartbreaking than them misbehaving.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like there are days where I'm like, I would rather have a house full of kids misbehaving than all the kids gone going, I don't want to do dinner with you.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: I don't want to watch a movie with you.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_02: It's like See, this is what I remind myself because Instagram, TikTok, you know, those videos that people create with audios, right?
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_02: Um that like break your heart and rip it out of your chest and stomp on it.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like, you had a day where you've lost your patience and you're like, well, you just want peace and quiet.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_02: And then you hear some audio on TikTok, like it's where you have 14 summers with your kid and 14 Christmases with your kid, or 14 there, or 15 this with your kid, and so they don't want anything to do with you on those days.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_02: They want to be off doing it with their friends or they're this or they're that.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like, well, when you put it like that, and I only get that many with my kids, I like that puts it into perspective, you know, because it's gonna be like you're saying one day, I'm gonna wish for the chaos.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_02: And there was another another audio that was on Instagram.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_02: I think I'm even made a video to it years ago.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_02: One day, 20 years from now, I will give anything to go back to even the most chaotic day with my kids.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, even the most painful, like, oh my god, rip my hair out day, frustrating day, sad day.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_02: I will give anything to go back to one of those moments with my kids.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_02: And so to find beauty in even the hard times is like the challenge, right?
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_02: And also the lesson to find beauty in the being able to parent them and to raise good humans, even though it's really hard.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you're parenting yourself at the same time, right?
• 24:36
  SPEAKER_02: I'm fine, like I joke about oh, that's triggering.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_02: I'm parenting myself at the same time.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm like, okay, that was triggering for me.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_02: Where is that coming from?
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_02: Why?
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_02: It's not their fault.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_02: They don't understand what that is.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_02: I gotta like manage my stuff so I can then go be a parent for their stuff.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's big, dude.
• 24:53
  SPEAKER_00: It's exhausting.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: It's insane.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_00: You you make a really good point there because it's insane the moment your focus changes when you become a parent.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: And it it's not right away.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: I don't think it's right away.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's kind of a slow climb as they start to age, then you start learning more about yourself along the way.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: And then you kind of start thinking about your past, and you start going, man, maybe maybe that was a shit decision like not too long ago.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I should have thought this through more and thought that through more, but it it's so fulfilling because of the lessons you learn as a result of it all.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_02: Totally.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, your kids can be mirrors for you, you know.
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_02: Oftentimes when you're looking at them, you're like, oh, just oh, I could just go to your room.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like, that's literally me speaking to me right now.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_02: You know, this is some of my kids being a mirror for me, trying to show me something that, you know, I can heal within myself and help this person, you know, not have to go through these triggers and reactions.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I can see it, I can manage this differently for them instead of just uh adding fuel to the fire in a sense.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_02: It's very interesting.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_00: I love this line of conversation more than I can even express because I don't think there's enough of these out there.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: Probably let's uh let's kind of step back a little bit and kind of tie this in with discipline.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_00: You are really well known for your dance, for being one of the best dancers in the world.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: See, I'm just gonna shine you up this whole episode.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just gonna leave it.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: The best for last, best dancer in the world.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: How has that influenced your parenting style and just your the overall the way that you've lived as a human being is that discipline that you've learned through dance?
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_02: So I find it really interesting.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_02: Here's where like step parent life comes into play.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_02: I came into these my baby's life what what four years ago.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_02: And so I and I grew up very differently to them.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_02: The way I grew up, I was in a country town, so mom and dad had me in all the activities and all the things.
• 27:13
  SPEAKER_02: It was, and I loved being social.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_02: So I was in sports, I was in stuff at school, and I was also in dance, and I was always doing something.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and these kids, and it's also their generations too, because of COVID, they missed a lot of that stuff.
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_02: You know, so there's not really sports teams and these sorts of things that they're on and doing.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_02: And for me, it was like, no, you need that.
• 27:38
  SPEAKER_02: It's skill building, not saying you've got to be a, you know, the next um superstar football player, but like this teamwork skills that you learn in doing a team sport or a solo sport or an instrument or whatever.
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_02: There is a discipline, there is a something that you show up to.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_02: So for me, that is a fundamental part of parenting.
• 27:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and Zayn will 100% have those things.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I've already tried it out with um baby soccer, you know, because I want him to have it's not that I want him to be a soccer player.
• 28:09
  SPEAKER_02: I just want him to have these skills of socialization and listening and learning and whatever.
• 28:14
  SPEAKER_02: And so that's something that I got to figure out uh with my bonus babies.
• 28:18
  SPEAKER_02: We talk constantly about things they want to do or things that interest them and trying to find it.
• 28:23
  SPEAKER_02: But I did read somewhere that you have the first eight years of a kid's life to really build their um their rhythm, their beat, the way they like to move, what they like to do.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_02: Like, do they like discipline things?
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_02: Do they like, are they a couch potato?
• 28:36
  SPEAKER_02: Like all these things, you have the first eight years to really build nutrition, activity, all this, all that stuff.
• 28:45
  SPEAKER_02: And then they've got their idea of what they like to do and what they want to do.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_02: I hope that makes sense.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_02: It was a little bit of words out.
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_00: It totally does.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_02: So it's harder for me for with these kids, they're active kids, they love to play, they'll go out in the play in our backyard.
• 28:59
  SPEAKER_02: It's like a kid's wonderland.
• 29:00
  SPEAKER_02: We have all the things they can play on.
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_02: But getting them to want to be in a team sport and to do these other things or to commit to, I have one kid so freaking talented, learned uh Beethoven's fifth off of YouTube, like all sorts of things, so naturally gifted at every creative medium you could imagine, can sing, can paint, can play piano, can just can like can but will not commit to it.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_02: The minute that um they have to learn technique and it has to be sitting in discipline and learning, peace out, peace out, don't want to do it, I'm bored, don't like it.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I actually find that really hard because it's like as a parent, oh my god, you have a skill.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_02: You actually have like 10 skills.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_02: Let's pick one and do something.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_02: But then I also remember that I, as a kid, I was put into dance, I was put into everything.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_02: I stuck with dance because I was so very good at it.
• 29:54
  SPEAKER_02: We moved to Sydney, I had to pick one form of it, short story is right.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_02: And I was in ballroom dancing seven days a week, pretty much.
• 30:01
  SPEAKER_02: I got to the age of 15, I was wishing for a way out to be a normal kid because even though I loved it so much, my parents went full in full on into like we're dancing or dancing family, we are dance parents, we're doing all the competitions, all the things.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_02: And it became too much.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_02: And then I busted my knee, had two years off the floor, and then after that, it became my choice to go back into dancing because I missed it.
• 30:25
  SPEAKER_02: That was at 18.
• 30:26
  unknown: Yeah.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_02: And so that plays on my mind when I think about my kids and these skills that they have and what how far do how hard do I push them?
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_02: And it's a line that I'm always playing with, especially because step parent life, I don't want to be the step parent that keeps pushing them to do things if they don't want to do them.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_02: I think with Zayn, it will be a little different because from his very, very formative years, he'll be in activities and doing things and he'll be in baby sports teams and after schools.
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_02: I'll put him in dance, he can try it out.
• 30:56
  SPEAKER_02: We'll see what he wants to do.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_02: He loves to sing right now.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_02: Who knows where we go with it?
• 31:00
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 31:01
  SPEAKER_02: But I'm gonna put him in stuff for him to feel it out and try it and have him enjoy going and doing stuff and experiencing stuff and learning stuff.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: I love being a student.
• 31:12
  SPEAKER_02: I love learning.
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_02: Give me a new skill.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_02: I want to learn it, give me all the stuff.
• 31:16
  SPEAKER_02: But these guys are like, you know, and I'm sure they'll have other things.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_02: They're gonna have long careers and be very successful.
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_02: But I, because of the way I was brought up, I'm not a hundred percent sure on what the best way is to guide them and where what to do.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_02: You know what I mean?
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_02: Because it's so very different to what I would have done.
• 31:36
  SPEAKER_02: Does that make sense?
• 31:37
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, absolutely.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, taking the optimist viewpoint on it, it sometimes will find them.
• 31:44
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, totally, yes, and I think it will.
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: Very similar to you guys, um, we have a very right-brained, structured one of our kids in our house, and to the point where where yours manifests in leadership, ours manifests in a form of OCD a little bit.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_00: She's a little OCD, and God love her for it.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um but I also have a very left-brained uh child too, and it's it's my biological daughter, and she is very um, very creative, fantastic painter, fantastic musician.
• 32:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like I like grinded for years and years and years trying to make it as a musician.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_00: This girl's got more talent in her pinky than I do in my entire body.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_00: But you know, but if I sit her down and I say, hey, let's go into the studio and let's record something, she's like, no, I don't want to do that.
• 32:35
  SPEAKER_00: Totally.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_02: Bry's the same, you know, like the he's an MC.
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: Do you know what I mean?
• 32:40
  SPEAKER_02: He had a rap album in the 90s, he still makes beats, he's got some incredible stuff down there that he's working on and new stuff that's actually been coming his way.
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_02: And he's always wanted to do something with his kids.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_02: And the one that is so incredibly musically talented can sing beautifully, by the way.
• 32:56
  SPEAKER_02: And he was like, hey, let's do a track together.
• 32:59
  SPEAKER_02: No, this is a kid that, by the way, sang Castle on a cloud at like the age of seven at a school thing, and parents were sobbing, like can sing type of thing.
• 33:10
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, crazy.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_02: And it's heartbreaking.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_02: It's heartbreaking because I'm like, oh my god, and also they love to act, uh, and is currently at a talent level that could be on Broadway, you know what I mean?
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_02: Like without having any blessing is just raw talent.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_02: People have come to see um plays, um uh The Lion King, actually, and their comments were like, Oh my god, oh my god, who is that?
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and it's just that it's like, yes, I know, but you know, trying to figure out how to nurture that, but not be a stage mom and push it too far, you know, because I could so easily be a stage mom, mine, because it's my passion, right?
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_02: Performing arts, I would be in it.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_02: Oof, God help Zayn if he's into performing arts.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I'm in it.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_00: You hooked me with the Le Miz reference.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: Because it was when I was when I was a teenager and in my early 20s, my dream was to always be Jean Valjean.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_00: But my daughter did the same, did something almost similar.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: Uh last year, she did a thing at a talent show where she sang Adele's Love in the Dark.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_00: And like God.
• 34:20
  SPEAKER_00: I I so I'm sitting there with my phone videoing this thing, and I'm like, I hope nobody's seeing me because I got like tears going down.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, big old macho guy with cell phone bubble.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_02: That was me, but it was Hakuna Matado at the spectacular, absolutely spectacular.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I absolutely love that.
• 34:44
  SPEAKER_00: So let's touch on your first movie experience, three killer pigs.
• 34:50
  SPEAKER_00: I know.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_00: What is this all about?
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let's talk about it.
• 34:54
  SPEAKER_02: Isn't it wild?
• 34:56
  SPEAKER_02: Um I have always loved acting.
• 35:00
  SPEAKER_02: And for the longest time, everyone would tell me you should be an actress.
• 35:04
  SPEAKER_02: But for me, because I've dedicated my life to an art form, right?
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_02: I was like, I can't jump mediums.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_02: What do you mean?
• 35:10
  SPEAKER_02: That's like it's not um respectful to it.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_02: How could I ever possibly just jump in and be an actress?
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_02: I'm I'm a dancer, but I do, and I've always been told, even with my dancing, it was always my storytelling.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_02: It was the choreography that I create, the way that it is always my storytelling, my facial expressions, and whatever.
• 35:27
  SPEAKER_02: This was what people loved me.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_02: It was always my strength.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_02: And so I decided, you know what?
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna do it.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_02: And I I sucked up, I leaned into the discomfort, is a better way of saying it, of being in a room with people that may or may not know me and getting on a stage and possibly being terrible at something because I'm so used to being great at it.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_02: And it was really scary for me.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_02: And I started in this um acting class, and I I can't tell you how it felt like coming home from the very first class that I sat in, and how it's been two, no, a year and a half now of being in class and really and stuff like that.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_02: And it was really Bri that encouraged me.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_02: It was Bri that was like, you absolutely can do this.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_02: I would read with him on his own auditions and stuff like that.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_02: He's like, babe, you can act.
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_02: For someone that's never had lessons in this, you can act.
• 36:21
  SPEAKER_02: Please go and do this and take class.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_02: And I knew when I wasn't called back for dancing with the stars, I know myself, I know I need a creative outlet for me.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_02: And I had to find something, and it was like, well, then it's time.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_02: It's time.
• 36:35
  SPEAKER_02: The universe has created this opening for me, and it's time to do something with it.
• 36:39
  SPEAKER_02: And I fell in love with it, dude.
• 36:41
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I fell in love with it, being on that stage.
• 36:44
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my god, finding my process, creating a character, creating nuances that aren't just for dance, but as a human being, it was just it's delicious to me.
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_02: I love it so much.
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and so this opportunity came up to be in a movie.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_02: And I am not a horror-watching person.
• 37:02
  SPEAKER_02: I personally don't like being afraid.
• 37:04
  SPEAKER_02: It's not a feeling that I love.
• 37:06
  SPEAKER_02: So I don't really watch horror films.
• 37:09
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and this film came up called Three Killer Pigs, and I ummed an art on whether I said yes to it because I'm like, it's not my genre.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_02: It kind of I don't enjoy watching films like that because I don't like being, it's no shade on them.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_02: They're great films.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_02: I just don't really enjoy them.
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_02: Can I do it?
• 37:24
  SPEAKER_02: It's a very niche type of way or specific type of way of acting too, you know, the the screaming, getting into that like blood curdling scream and fear.
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_02: Like that's a place I'd never even discovered in class before.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and so I was really afraid of it.
• 37:39
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, you know what?
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_02: That's why I need to do it because I'm afraid of it.
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_02: And how could I pass up the opportunity for my first time being on set, Bri being there also?
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_02: Like there's beautiful safe environment.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_02: Thomas Churchill and Alex Hunt, they create the most incredible, like safe environment, and it felt like a very cool place to just try it out.
• 38:00
  SPEAKER_02: Now, let me tell you, my death scene is gruesome with a capital G.
• 38:05
  SPEAKER_02: Actually, all in capitals.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_02: It is gruesome, it's messy.
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_00: Are you okay sharing the fact that you die in this?
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I believe so.
• 38:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I think so.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_02: Well, we're doing it now, so there you go.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_02: Um, all quick hang is gone.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_02: But it's it's a horror film.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_02: Listen, it's like there's a lot of blood guts and gore.
• 38:24
  SPEAKER_02: At some point, everyone gets sliced up.
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_02: But it was so for me, it was intimidating.
• 38:32
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, I worked on it and I'm like, I can do this.
• 38:34
  SPEAKER_02: I found really cool, gritty things to bring to her.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_02: I love the layers that I brought to her.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_02: And then my first scene on set, it was so surreal, dude.
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_02: I was nervous, but I couldn't feel my legs.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I was like, oh my god.
• 38:45
  SPEAKER_02: And it was like one of my easiest scenes of the whole situation.
• 38:49
  SPEAKER_02: And uh I'm standing there and I have the conversation, we do it, and I sort of look over at Brian, I'm like, was it good?
• 38:57
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like I had no idea what even happened.
• 38:59
  SPEAKER_02: It's like if you've ever seen old school and Will Farrell is on the debating team and he just sort of like goes, Oh, I blacked out what happened.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_02: Like that was me.
• 39:08
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I was like, I did not know what happened.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, was it okay?
• 39:11
  SPEAKER_01: And everyone's like, oh my God, you've never acted before.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_02: And so from there, I just got more and more comfortable and more and more discoveries about me on a set and what I need.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_02: Is it is it like the most incredible performance ever?
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_02: Heck no, it's my first time ever on a set, but it's stuff that I'm really proud of.
• 39:31
  SPEAKER_02: And there are some scenes that were really incredible.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_02: I had people crying in one of the scenes uh because of what it entails and what it was.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_02: I discovered my process of how to call on emotion.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_02: That was something that was really hard for me.
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_02: I, which is wild, by the way, because I'm a really emotional person.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_02: If if a Toyota commercial is right and the song is just right, I will cry.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_02: Like since having a child, I will cry at anything.
• 39:58
  SPEAKER_02: It's you know, a kid runs up to hug their dad, old people kissing and holding hands, like stuff just makes me emotional.
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_02: So for some reason I couldn't get access to my emotions when doing scenes to like truly call on tears because I would overthink it, right?
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 40:12
  SPEAKER_02: And I found my process of what I needed all at the 11th hour in the time that I was meant to for this scene, and it came to me in the right way, and it was just oh so perfect and made so much sense.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I know that I can call on that now whenever I want that.
• 40:28
  SPEAKER_02: I know that process.
• 40:29
  SPEAKER_02: But it was really freaking cool.
• 40:32
  SPEAKER_02: And I I ran the gambit of all emotions on this.
• 40:35
  SPEAKER_02: It's you know, and I love the grittiness of the character that I got to play, and um, and you know, sharing that with Bri and him being there on set made me so we don't have any scenes with each other.
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_02: He just came for my first day because I wanted him to.
• 40:49
  SPEAKER_02: And he, of course, offered his like, I don't have to be there.
• 40:52
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it's whatever you want that makes you feel comfortable.
• 40:54
  SPEAKER_02: At any point you want me to leave, tell me to leave.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_02: And I loved having him there because I felt so safe.
• 41:00
  SPEAKER_02: And then when he had to leave because he had to go pick up the kids, I felt that like panic of like, oh my god, no, don't go, don't go.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_02: He's like, babe, you've got this.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_02: You're so good at this.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you you're amazing.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_02: And the feedback from everyone was overwhelming, overwhelmingly positive, to the point where you're like, Are you blowing smoke up my ass a little bit?
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_02: And then you realize, like, no, everyone's kind of saying it.
• 41:23
  SPEAKER_02: And I realized I shouldn't deflect that and minimize it and push it away.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_02: I should receive that um as confirmation that I'm on the right track and doing something cool and that I do actually have a place in this.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_02: And so it was it was really dope, dude.
• 41:39
  SPEAKER_02: It was super fun.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I am so pumped for I'm pumped to see it.
• 41:44
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so is the bug fully sunk its teeth into you?
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_00: Or are you looking for more roles now?
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_02: Heck yeah.
• 41:51
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 41:52
  SPEAKER_02: 100%, 100%, and I want all of them.
• 41:55
  SPEAKER_02: I love the gritty ones, the painful ones.
• 41:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like I want to play a drug addict at some point.
• 42:00
  SPEAKER_02: Like I want, I want the things that I would in my life never ever ever be or do.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_02: Because I found that to be so this this scene and this crazy horror movie and you know, all that stuff that I was so afraid of because it's like, oh my god, how do I?
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_02: I wouldn't even know.
• 42:16
  SPEAKER_02: You I fell in love with how fun that I get to be her.
• 42:21
  SPEAKER_02: Because I'll never ever be her.
• 42:23
  SPEAKER_02: That how fun that I get to be her.
• 42:25
  SPEAKER_02: So I forget the bugger, suck its teeth that dude.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I'm only it's hard for some people to kind of make that correlation, but I think the charisma that you demonstrate through your experience on dancing with the stars and just being a dancer and a performer in general, and even just watching your content that you create on TikTok and Instagram and such, that you have a natural charisma that it does not surprise me that this came to you so naturally, or it felt like it came to you so naturally.
• 42:57
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm really excited to kind of see where this path takes you.
• 43:02
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
• 43:03
  SPEAKER_02: Me too.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_02: And look, I'm under no um false pretense, no idea that it's just gonna be an easy road.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_02: I've done one film and was very, very lucky to get on it also because of being with Bri and Bri being connected in this space.
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_02: Like I'm not um blind to that in my privilege in that because there are a lot of talented actors that are trying for a long time to get those opportunities.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_02: And I've got to prove myself.
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_02: I've got to still keep working and actually build a tool set and not think I've done a movie, I'm it, I'm in it.
• 43:34
  SPEAKER_02: No, I am just beginning, but I'm really grateful that I got an opportunity to experience being on set in that way because it's very different to any experience that I've ever had.
• 43:43
  SPEAKER_02: I've even choreographed a movie, but I've not been in front of the lens like that, being another person.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it was it was very, very cool.
• 43:50
  SPEAKER_02: And so I have a lot of work to do, but I'm really excited about that work.
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, that is fantastic.
• 43:58
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I think we would be remote.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_00: Miss to not talk about it, but we have to talk about Brian's campaign to get you to be a judge on Dancing with the Stars.
• 44:08
  SPEAKER_00: You knew I was gonna pull this out.
• 44:10
  SPEAKER_01: But do I love that man?
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_01: I come home and I'm like, I see the video.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't even know it was up there.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_02: It had been up for hours, and I for suddenly I'm like, that's my man.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_02: Like, how could I not be?
• 44:20
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, he's my number one fan.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_02: And um he always wants what's best for me.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_02: He'll fight for me, he'll rally for me, he will he will petition for me.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_02: He's he's the absolute best.
• 44:36
  SPEAKER_02: And he believes in me too, you know, even the acting thing.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_02: Like he sees me and he sees what I'm capable of.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_02: But he's by no means someone that would ever tell me to do something if he like just to say it to make me feel good.
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_02: He's bluntly honest, and so I know when he says something or believes in something, it's for real.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I love that about him too.
• 44:55
  SPEAKER_02: So when I saw that video, I like at first it was like, what are you doing?
• 45:00
  SPEAKER_02: And then it then I was like, Oh no, yeah, you should totally do that because I love you and that's amazing.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_02: And let's put that on blast because how cool would that be?
• 45:10
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely, and I don't, and I think he said it in his video, I don't remember really his words, but it's not a petition to replace anyone by any means.
• 45:20
  SPEAKER_02: Those judges are icons.
• 45:22
  SPEAKER_02: You do not think of the show without seeing their faces and their names, you know.
• 45:27
  SPEAKER_02: But if there was a position to open up to be the fourth judge, I would oh my god, what an honor.
• 45:33
  SPEAKER_02: What a full circle moment.
• 45:35
  SPEAKER_02: I do judge it in Australia and it's huge.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_02: I love it.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_02: It feels like coming home.
• 45:39
  SPEAKER_02: It feels so right, you know.
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_02: I 14 years I've been on that show, 14 years of knowledge and experience of how to teach people that don't dance, how to be teach people that think they can't dance, um, how to create a story, how to create a journey, how to connect choreography and make it entertaining but also technical.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_02: Like there are so many things.
• 46:01
  SPEAKER_02: Can you hear that noise in the background?
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_02: Are you okay?
• 46:03
  SPEAKER_02: You're good.
• 46:04
  SPEAKER_02: There are so many things that I've learned that I love sharing with the pros and uh when I'm over there in Australia.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it just feels great.
• 46:13
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it's funny.
• 46:14
  SPEAKER_02: I was from the first episode that I sat as a judge on that table, I was never nervous, never freaked out about what I'd say, never whether could I do it.
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_02: It honestly just felt aligned and right.
• 46:26
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I love it.
• 46:27
  SPEAKER_02: It's very special.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_02: I get to do it in Australia too.
• 46:29
  SPEAKER_02: My family gets to see me on telly, as we say, out there.
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_02: And it's it's it's very, very cool.
• 46:35
  SPEAKER_02: Uh, but to be able to do it here, wow, you know, what a gift, what an honor.
• 46:41
  SPEAKER_02: Um, it's a very prestigious panel, just as it is in Australia and everywhere else.
• 46:45
  SPEAKER_02: But I sort of grew up on that show with those people, much like Derek did, you know, with those people judging me.
• 46:51
  SPEAKER_02: And and I learned so much of because of what they said to me and the critique that they gave and the way that they guided me throughout each season.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_02: And to be able to sit and share that space with them and give that back to these younger kids that are coming through on the show.
• 47:08
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, wow, it would be a dream, you know.
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and for those of you, those of you that are not, and I know that's very few of you already following Sharna.
• 47:20
  SPEAKER_00: The day after every episode of Dancing with the Stars, she does this great breakdown of every single dance.
• 47:27
  SPEAKER_00: You're already doing the judging, you're just doing it in your own space.
• 47:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's fantastic.
• 47:32
  SPEAKER_02: Fantastic follow.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_02: It was um, it was really fun doing that.
• 47:36
  SPEAKER_02: I don't know why I haven't done that in other seasons when I haven't been on.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_02: Um but I decided, and my approach with doing those was that there were many of the pros and people that were doing their judging critiques of the show.
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, that's cool.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_02: But I found what was happening and what I was reading online is people weren't understanding what the judges were saying on the live show because their time was getting shorter and shorter.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's not that the judges don't know how to say it, it's that sometimes they had literally 20 seconds to get their critique out.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_02: And I thought, let me help them out a little bit.
• 48:09
  SPEAKER_02: So my goal was to be like, okay, so Carrie Ann said XYZ.
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_02: This is what she means by that, and show it and describe it and help them better understand what the judges are saying because we got such a new massive audience this last season of Dancing with the Stars, too.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_02: And some of them are like, wait, what is a Chacha lockstep?
• 48:27
  SPEAKER_02: You know, they knew coming into this game.
• 48:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's the young crowd, and I freaking love that.
• 48:31
  SPEAKER_02: And I wanted to help educate them and catch them up on the things these judges are talking about.
• 48:36
  SPEAKER_02: But I do have um, I've always had a knack for being concise and being able to explain things in like layman's terms so people that have never been dancers can understand what a frame means, what the posture means, what these crazy foot silly words are that we use to describe dance, so other people can understand them.
• 48:53
  SPEAKER_02: Because that's what I had to learn by uh learn being a pro.
• 48:57
  SPEAKER_02: You know, no football player is gonna understand samba walk, crossadus walk, you know, what any of the things that we use, even frame is like a picture, you know, and I mean there's all this language that we have to explain.
• 49:10
  SPEAKER_02: And so I found people needed that and I just filled that space.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 49:14
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you could almost grab another former pro and start a weekly recap podcast.
• 49:22
  SPEAKER_02: It's hard because so many people do it, you know.
• 49:25
  SPEAKER_02: That's true.
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I say so many, but not everybody's you.
• 49:29
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
• 49:30
  SPEAKER_02: You're the sweetest.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_02: You're actually the second person that said that to me this week in relation to something um in into something.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_02: There's there's a cross there's a correlation there, and so I'm gonna take that on board and listen.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for that.
• 49:46
  SPEAKER_00: Well, sometimes the universe gives you the answers that you know you didn't have before.
• 49:51
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so good at minimizing myself, dude.
• 49:53
  SPEAKER_02: Like, oh no, everybody else does it.
• 49:55
  SPEAKER_02: Like it into not I'm so good at that at not thinking that I could do it better.
• 50:00
  SPEAKER_02: And I think there's this like thing with me that's a tall poppy syndrome in Australia.
• 50:04
  SPEAKER_02: Never think you're bigger or better than anyone else because they'll cut the tallest puppy, right?
• 50:08
  SPEAKER_02: And it's an Aussie mentality.
• 50:10
  SPEAKER_02: And so I find my whole life I've been so good at minimizing myself that it's always minimized by success to a degree.
• 50:17
  SPEAKER_02: And so thank you for the reminder because I have to be better at that.
• 50:22
  SPEAKER_00: No, that's uh that's another good point because uh there's a creator online, his name is Thomas Crown, and all of his videos are like financial videos, but they're kind of parody, and he talks about how rich people versus real rich people act, and real rich people are nice and humble, and rich people are like raggadocious and carry about themselves a certain way.
• 50:45
  SPEAKER_02: Same with celebrities, dude.
• 50:46
  SPEAKER_02: Same with celebrities.
• 50:47
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly, and I think that sense of humility lends to an extra layer of success because you have that humility, you don't let your work ethic drop by the wayside because you're always trying to outdo your last effort and just you know, I mean, you know that you're around enough successful people where you know when people are being legit and when they're not.
• 51:11
  SPEAKER_01: 100%.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_01: You can call bullshit real quick, or at least you gotta you gotta learn to, you know.
• 51:19
  SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_01: The survival skill in this business.
• 51:24
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm not gonna hold you up any longer.
• 51:26
  SPEAKER_00: I have thoroughly enjoyed this conversation.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_00: Super fun.
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_00: I am so glad we're friends and we're connected now.
• 51:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, me too.
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_00: My closing question, it's kind of off the wall, but I don't think it's gonna be so off the wall with you because I think we share a very similar mindset.
• 51:44
  SPEAKER_00: What's your advice for making the world a better place tomorrow than what it is today?
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_02: Kindness, courage, and gratitude to have it for everyone always at all times.
• 51:53
  SPEAKER_02: We can have different belief systems, we can have different religions, we can have different ways of parenting, we can have different things we like to do, but we can still be good people to each other.
• 52:04
  SPEAKER_02: We can believe in different political beliefs, but we can still be good people to each other.
• 52:09
  SPEAKER_02: At the end of the day, we are what creates the energy in this space, in our in our town, in our state, in our country.
• 52:19
  SPEAKER_02: And to play into the fact that we are different and this divisiveness only creates more of it and more unrest.
• 52:26
  SPEAKER_02: But to open up and have conversations with each other and be okay with being different is I think the greatest thing we can do for each other, for humanity, to be okay with people being different and to not feel like everyone has to believe in what you believe because your opinions are not facts.
• 52:45
  SPEAKER_02: And we are now not even living in a world where we can trust truly what we see and read.
• 52:52
  SPEAKER_02: So to just believe that we're all good people trying to do the very best that we can, uh, and to have kindness, courage, and gratitude at all times, in all ways for all people.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_00: I love that.
• 53:05
  SPEAKER_00: That goes in tandem with one of my favorite lines.
• 53:09
  SPEAKER_00: I had a mentor tell me one time, and I've carried it through my whole life, and it is you are an individual, but so is everybody else.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I love that.
• 53:20
  SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
• 53:21
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh.
• 53:22
  SPEAKER_00: Sharna Burgess, everybody follow her online, follow her on Instagram, follow her TikTok while TikTok still exists.
• 53:29
  SPEAKER_00: You know, at least for another 75 days it got extended.
• 53:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but but follow her while it still exists.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_00: Sharna, I really appreciate you making the time, hanging out with me.
• 53:41
  SPEAKER_00: This has been a lot of fun.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_00: The world is a much better place with you and it, my friend.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, dude, thank you.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_02: I feel the same about you.
• 53:48
  SPEAKER_02: This was awesome.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much for having me.
• 53:51
  SPEAKER_00: Once again, I want to thank Sharna Burgess for doing the podcast today.
• 53:57
  SPEAKER_00: Make sure you do yourself a favor and follow her on Instagram.
• 54:01
  SPEAKER_00: Follow Brian Austin Green as well.
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_00: They're a great couple.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_00: They make a lot of content together.
• 54:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's always a fun time.
• 54:09
  SPEAKER_00: Follow the podcast at OldishPod, also on Instagram.
• 54:14
  SPEAKER_00: And while you're being generous with the social media follows, make sure you are following Caught on the Mic on Facebook, on Instagram, on TikTok, Wallet Blast, or visit me at www.cotonTheMic.com.
• 54:31
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of cool things in the works, and I can't wait to share it all with you.
• 54:37
  SPEAKER_00: Or guest inquiries.
• 54:39
  SPEAKER_00: If you are interested in being on the show or you know somebody that would be, email me, caught on the mic at gmail.com.
• 54:48
  SPEAKER_00: This has been caught on the mic with Michael Clark.
• 54:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Michael Clark.
• 54:52
  SPEAKER_00: Until next time, thank you.