Latest / The Action Catalyst / REMASTERED: Mental Toughness Habits of Ultra Performers, with Ben Newman (Motivation, Determination, Business, Coaching)

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REMASTERED: Mental Toughness Habits of Ultra Performers, with Ben Newman (Motivation, Determination, Business, Coaching) · The Action Catalyst

• 0:37
  Host: Ben Newman, his expertise is in the area of mental
• 0:41
  toughness, and ultra performance, and it's cool, he
• 0:45
  works in business, but he also works with sports teams like the
• 0:49
  Rams in the NFL, he's worked with the chargers and the
• 0:52
  cowboys and the Rams. And he has been a performance coach for the
• 0:55
  North Dakota State bison who won a national championship and the
• 0:58
  Mizzou basketball team, he shared the stage with people
• 1:01
  like Jerry Rice, and you know, Ray Lewis. And so here he is. So
• 1:05
  Ben, welcome to the show.
• 1:07
  Ben Newman: Thank you so much for that introduction. That's
• 1:09
  amazing to have this opportunity to be with all your listeners.
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  But one thing I want to add to that bio, because you're
• 1:14
  highlighting the good stuff, is I have tried to fight to get
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  better every single day. And I've always found that when we
• 1:20
  get knocked down, that's when we really learn what we're made of.
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  So I'm excited to learn from you and excited to be with all your
• 1:25
  listeners.
• 1:26
  Host: So let's talk about getting knocked down. First of
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  all, just since we're on the topic of the NFL, and I know
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  that like you only work with teams in the NFL, but that
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  you've got a good little roster there. And I know specifically
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  one of the things you do is you work with the rookies, but how
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  do you prepare a rookie mentally for the NFL? Like what's that
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  like?
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  Ben Newman: So I'll share it with you go from, you know,
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  playing in college where there's hundreds of teams to 32 teams,
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  and it's the best in the world. But there's one caveat I want to
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  add. And it's where I often spend a lot of time with
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  athletes, and I'm going to relate it back to all the
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  listeners, you're also fighting for a job you don't think about
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  in college. You know, it's the love of the game. It's the
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  passion for the game, these rookies even drafted guys, right
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  seven rounds in the draft. Sometimes they show up. And
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  there are people fighting to take their job, they don't care
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  where you were drafted, you are looking at a depth chart to
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  determine how good you are. And it's easy to get distracted in
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  terms of your focus. And then these men who are bigger and
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  stronger and have the experience, they want to hit you
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  as hard as they can, because you're not a teammate yet. I
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  want to take your job. And I think sometimes we as
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  individuals, no matter what we're doing, we get we get
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  distracted, right? We get distracted from what we're
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  supposed to do. So what I always encourage athletes to do and
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  really for the listeners, everybody listening, if I was
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  sitting one on one with you, you could describe a period of time
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  in your career where you have been most successful. You could
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  take me back and tell me what that emotion felt like what your
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  behaviors look like what your belief felt like. And that's
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  what I do with these athletes. I say forget about the
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  distractions, we got to clear the clutter. Do not worry about
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  a depth chart, focus on what it looks like for you to be your
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  best. And we've had the blessing of working with many
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  individuals. I actually wrote an article for Forbes you guys can
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  check it out. It's called Heart harnessing the power of your
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  vision about will Compton and Wilcoxon was an undrafted, free
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  agent. Everything I just shared, I did with him the first time we
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  ever met. He was an undrafted, free agent out of University of
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  Nebraska. Fast forward four years, starting middle
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  linebacker for the Washington Redskins, and he's their
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  defensive captain. And literally the first time we met everything
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  I just said, Tell me what made you a captain and Nebraska
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  helped me understand the feeling and emotion. What do you believe
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  and forget about the things you can't control, we actually use a
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  technique that I call your emotional trigger. So we
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  actually take that player back to that ideal state, I want to
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  feel the emotion tell me what the grass felt like under your
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  feet. Tell me what the sweat felt like dripping down your
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  nose. And the moment you put your hand on the ground before
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  they snapped that football. What did it feel like? And where was
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  your belief system? I want to take you right there. So think
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  about it. Let's take one of your listeners right now who's in
• 4:13
  sales. And right now they are stressed about a big target.
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  They're stressed about a big quota. And we take them to that
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  moment they can see it, they can feel it. And then we actually
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  say, Hey, Ben and I are going to sit back and we're just going to
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  listen, and we listen to all that emotion. The follow up
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  question then becomes what were you not thinking about? When you
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  were in that state of telling me how great that moment was? Well,
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  I'm not thinking about the quota. I'm not thinking about
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  the stress. You see, we all have the ability to control our
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  thoughts and our mindset. If you focus on the stress of the
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  quota, you'll be stressed out by the quota. If you get yourself
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  into a mindset where I can say all I can control is one dial at
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  a time. I'll be locked in up just like a football player. I'm
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  locked in and focus six seconds to play. I'm locked in and so
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  Just one dial at a time. And I'm gonna give my love my passion,
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  my energy from my work to this phone call. And when I'm done
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  with this phone call, I'm gonna go to the next. And I'm not
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  gonna worry about the last one or the next one, I'm gonna worry
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  about this one right now. So when you're thinking about
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  getting into that state, we silence the noise, we silence
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  the distraction, and we can focus.
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  Host: So when you talk about a rookie, one of the things you
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  said kind of earlier going backwards was you talked about
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  focus on what it looks like to be your best. I'm curious about
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  this competing versus yourself, versus competing against other
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  people in the world of professional sports. Do you
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  think that both of those exists? Is one better than the other?
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  And is there more of one than the other?
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  Ben Newman: Every NFL team 32 teams, every one of their goals
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  to win the Super Bowl, you know, no team is gonna say, you know,
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  our goal is that we lose every football game this year, I hope
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  it's just a terrible season, right? I mean, everybody, every
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  team wants to win the Super Bowl, Every team wants to crush
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  the competition. But the reality is, that's just the goal. The
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  only way that we can tackle that goal is for each individual on
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  that team, to give their very best, it's for each individual
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  to say, for my position, this is what I'm responsible for. And
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  I'm gonna take personal responsibility for the action I
• 6:19
  need to take in terms of how I break down my game film, the
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  nutrition I put in my body because of the energy that it
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  produces, to the effort that I put forth in the field, to the
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  effort that I put forth in the weight room, to the effort I put
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  forth in terms of my vision and my belief system. Once you've
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  designed that, it comes down to the choices that you make every
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  day. And that's between you and you. And I shared the stage in
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  Vegas last year with Jerry Rice. And before Jerry and I took the
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  stage Jerry looks at me and he says, You know what, then I've
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  never been able to understand how could somebody not give 100%
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  When it's 100% their choice. So to me, if a team's gonna crush
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  the competition, they're gonna win the Superbowl. Everybody has
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  to be locked in one heartbeat with a mentality, they're all
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  going to give their best, the vision, the crush the
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  competition, that's the goal. But I think these high
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  performers that have told you we want to crush the competition,
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  they're still focused on their accountability every day and
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  doing their work. They're doing it 100% of the time, the high
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  performers.
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  Host: And you think that, you know, like, I think of Ray
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  Lewis, and pardon me, just goes, surely there's some part of that
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  guy that's just thinking about just killing somebody, like just
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  crushing, like just going out and just demolishing somebody.
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  Ben Newman: Ray and I last year, we're having a conversation
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  about what it takes to be great. Will Compton who I mentioned
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  earlier was at this event Ray and I were speaking at, we're
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  sitting before the event starts Ray literally walks right over
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  to Wilkinson, and completely ignores that I'm sitting there
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  because it was his opportunity to mentor well, he puts one hand
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  on each knee. And if any of you ever seen a Ray Lewis video, I
• 7:50
  mean, the veins are popping out of his neck fire in his eyes.
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  I'm thinking what in the world is about to happen right here.
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  And he looked at Wisconsin, and he said, Well, are you ready for
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  me to take you to school, he said, I'm going to share with
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  you when I found the difference. He said the difference for me is
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  when I started taking personal responsibility for myself, I
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  broke down my own game film. And when I did that, early on in my
• 8:14
  career, I recognized that when I was playing four yards off the
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  line, I was nasty. But when I stepped up one yard to three
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  yards off the line, they didn't know what to do with me. He said
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  we know the rest of the story, don't we comp, and he's the
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  greatest linebacker to ever play the game. Super Bowl champions,
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  Super Bowl MVP. So the question for all the listeners is, when
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  is the last time you broke down your game film? When's the last
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  time we slowed down in this fast paced world we live in to say,
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  what makes you great? And what if you repeat what makes you
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  great? And what if you look at areas of opportunity, and you
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  try to get better every day to get great in that area, too.
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  That's how we increase our performance. So So picture this
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  first time John Gordon, I ever shared the stage, it's 2008. We
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  had about 350 people in the room. My mentor, right? We've
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  never shared the stage together. He's never heard me speak live.
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  And all of a sudden, we get to the end of the talk. And I'm
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  like ready for the feedback like John like, how did I do? And he
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  looks at me, and he says, Ben, Ben, I love you, man. The
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  message was great. But man, you are serious as a heart attack.
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  He's like, Did you realize that you're allowed to laugh and
• 9:31
  smile and tell jokes? And I think like, where are we in
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  life? If we don't have those people who are there to make us
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  better? And I didn't I didn't fight John on that. I said, I do
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  need to be myself. I was being too tense from the stage. I
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  wasn't letting my natural character and my goofy side
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  sometimes come out. So now all I want to do I want to connect
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  with people in the audience, because I'm trying to be my best
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  because I've got mental was trying to help take me there. So
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  it didn't that coaching is so important that breaking down the
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  game, but the willingness to take the feedback and to act on
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  it. That's how we improve.
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  Host: Yeah, let's talk about star players for a second, you
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  have this dynamic this balance between the team performing and
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  the team winning. But then you have star players, how does a
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  team full of people who are performing at the highest level
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  these ultra performers, should there not be star players?
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  Should it just be the team? And that's all that matters? Or is
• 10:30
  it okay?
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  Ben Newman: Absolutely. I'll give you the example of Tom
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  Brady. You know, if you look at Tom Brady, some people hate the
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  guy, some people love the guy, but that is the greatest NFL
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  player to ever walk the face of the earth. And he is humble. He
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  is always about the team. He never takes it about him. And he
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  works his butt off. I had the opportunity to be in there with
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  the Patriots, I had mentored one of their running backs. And so I
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  got the party on the field with them, I got to see the approach
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  to the you know, how they prepared for the game. And, and
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  I'm telling you, Tom Brady has a focus and a demeanor about him
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  that allows other people to follow and to work harder, he
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  makes people around him better, because he doesn't have a big
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  ego. There's not a lot of swagger. It's all about the
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  team. And it's all about being the best. And I think the more
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  that star performers have that mentality, I'm here for us to
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  work as a unit to get better. No team in the history of football
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  has ever won a game with a quarterback and no defense and
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  no offensive lineman or wide receivers, one player against
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  11. It's never happened, it never will happen. It can't
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  happen. And Tom Brady's taken that approach, and no matter
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  what players they surround him with, he just wants to get
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  better. And he wants to work as hard as them. The greatest teams
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  recognize that not one person is more important than another. Not
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  one person is more important. So think about even for me for our
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  company, I'm no, I'm not more important than anybody else.
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  Because the reality is, you know, we have employees, and we
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  have subcontractors and people who help us run our business.
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  Everybody's equally as important. It doesn't matter
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  that I'm the one who's with the players, or I'm the one who's on
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  the stage. We all have to do our job we all have to perform in
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  order to have an impact on somebody's life.
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  Host: But you know, do you think jealousy is a big deal on the
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  team? You think that kind of stuff comes up?
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  Ben Newman: That is one of the issues I deal with a lot. You
• 12:28
  know, a lot of the conversations I have are things that I really
• 12:31
  can't get into, on on an interview, things of that
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  nature. But you can imagine that in real business or sports, but
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  you know, those are the conversations when we can really
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  help somebody is when you tell me what's really on your mind
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  that's holding you back. It Oh, don't just tell me how amazing
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  of a practice you had. Tell me when you're literally struggling
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  with the fact that the guy next to you who you know, you're
• 12:51
  better than is making three times as much money. Tell me
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  that that's bothering you so that we can have a conversation
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  to get past it. No different than one of your listeners right
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  now, who's somebody who's been there 10 years in a company that
• 13:02
  maybe doesn't believe in meritocracy, there's somebody
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  who you're a better performer than them. Yet, at the point
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  where you're at in your career, you're making less money, but
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  all we can control is to stay in our lane and to wait for our
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  time. Because all I want for all your listeners is to say, when
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  my opportunity comes, I've done everything I can control one day
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  at a time, I stayed in my lane and I continued to believe in
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  myself. It doesn't matter what anybody else does. Because when
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  the time is ready and the opportunities there, they're
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  going to look and say this guy or this gal gave it their best
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  every day. James 112 One of my favorite verses blessed as the
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  man I'll say man or woman who perseveres under trial for when
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  they have stood the test, they will receive the crown of life
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  that God has promised to those who love them. Every single one
• 13:48
  of you listening right now God has given you everything that
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  you need to write your story. Take it not not one book at a
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  time, not one chapter at a time. Take that pen and go one word at
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  a time and focus and be intentional with that word. Stay
• 14:06
  in your lane and know you've got everything you need to have an
• 14:08
  impact in the world.
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  Host: Powerful stuff. Where should people go if they want to
• 14:13
  connect with you and and learn more about mental toughness and
• 14:16
  peak performance?
• 14:18
  Ben Newman: Come follow us on Instagram at ContinuedFight
• 14:20
  Twitter as at ContnuedFight. My mother who passed 11 days before
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  my eighth birthday. She's the legacy that I fight for every
• 14:27
  single day to keep writing her story. And she taught me the
• 14:31
  greatest life lesson I've ever learned. And that's why we say
• 14:34
  at continued fight. It's not how long you live. It's how you
• 14:37
  choose to live your life. So keep fighting. Let's rise up
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  together and keep writing your story.
• 14:43
  Host: Ben Newman, thanks for being here. And hey, keep keep
• 14:47
  fighting the fight.
• 14:48
  Ben Newman: Thank you so much. Keep fighting the good fight as well.