Latest / Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings / Prank 14 Oct 2026

Transcript

Prank 14 Oct 2026 · Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: KFM Mornings with Darren, Sherlyn, Sims and you. It's Coldplay
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: with BTS, my universe here on KFM Mornings. We're going
• 0:09
  Speaker 1: to take a quick break and then we are pranking
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: somebody in the UK.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: Stop.
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Stop what you're doing. Here is another world famous prank
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: call from Darren Wackhead Simpson. Exclusive to KFM Mornings. OK,
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: so before we get into the set up, the nuts
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: and bolts of the story. I'm going to just show
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: you what a small world we actually live in. The
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: world is truly just one big village, right? So this
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: guy pops me an email from Nigeria wanting me to
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: prank his best friend who works in the UK as
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  Speaker 1: a nurse. Okay, so this is the end of the
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  Speaker 1: call with me and the guy in Nigeria. We're going
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: to play the ending before we play the beginning, all right?
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: Did you get him? I got him good, man. I
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: got him good.
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  Speaker 3: I've told him about you. I've said things like that.
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  Speaker 3: We never catch him.
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  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I got him good.
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  Speaker 3: Man, you are the best in the world. Honestly, I
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  Speaker 3: always listen to you. Oh, man.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: So tell me, Andre.
• 1:28
  Speaker 3: He tried the exam three times and it's the final time.
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  Speaker 3: So he thought he was going to fail.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: No. So tell me, how did you discover me?
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  Speaker 3: On TikTok.
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  Speaker 1: Oh, so you found me on TikTok?
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  Speaker 3: Brilliant. I don't know how many I've listened to. Every
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  Speaker 3: night I listen to you.
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  Speaker 1: Sure. That's crazy, man.
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  Speaker 3: It's so good to hear your voice. It's so good
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  Speaker 3: to speak to you. Honestly, you are the best in
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: the world.
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  Speaker 1: Thank you. It's so good to hear that there's people
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  Speaker 1: all over the world listening. Oh, yes.
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  Speaker 3: I'm going to send it to all our friends. I mean,
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  Speaker 3: some of our friends are in America, so I'm going
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  Speaker 3: to send it to them.
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  Speaker 1: Cool, Andre. Take care, man.
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: Thank you, Ake.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: Thank you. Thank you.
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  Speaker 3: You keep up doing your great work.
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  Speaker 1: Thank you very much. And you keep saving lives, man.
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  Speaker 1: So he's a nurse in Nigeria Alright So this is
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  Speaker 1: what happened He says My mate Alex Ayanbeku He has
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  Speaker 1: just written an exam In At the University of London
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  Speaker 1: Oh sounds serious It's very serious He's done the V300
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  Speaker 1: Independent Nurse Prescribing course So I did a bit of
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  Speaker 1: research On this course Alright So he's already a nurse
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  Speaker 1: And then he's this is levels above, you know, and
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  Speaker 1: it's quite a tough course. And he, so basically what
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  Speaker 1: this is, is it's for all already qualified registered nurses, midwives, um,
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  Speaker 1: to prescribe independently or supplementarily within the UK. So this
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  Speaker 1: course does pharmacology, therapeutics, clinical skills, governance and laws, special populations.
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  Speaker 1: The exams are hectic. Apparently, The final exam, you've got
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  Speaker 1: to get minimum 80% overall mark for the mathematical equations
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  Speaker 1: of this is 5 grams of this, 6 grams of that.
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  Speaker 1: You need to get 100% on the mathematical equation. 100%,
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  Speaker 1: no room for error. And it makes sense because the
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  Speaker 1: work is that serious. There are lives at stake.
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  Speaker 4: Absolutely.
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  Speaker 2: Absolutely.
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  Speaker 1: So if they prescribe you 22 milligrams of paracetamol when
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  Speaker 1: you should only have 18, it's a life or death situation,
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  Speaker 1: if you know what I mean, in a different world.
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  Speaker 1: That's why I have respect for pharmacists as well. I mean,
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  Speaker 1: it's precision work. So this is a hectic course and
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  Speaker 1: he's written it and he's come back and he's passed.
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  Speaker 1: Well done. Yes, so he's passed. Now, the other thing
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  Speaker 1: I need to tell you is that we are going
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  Speaker 1: to have a medical discussion here. I've gone and looked
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  Speaker 1: at past papers of this specific exam, okay?
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  Speaker 4: Sure.
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  Speaker 1: And I'm coming in left field with an angle, and
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  Speaker 1: obviously I'm coming in left field with an idea. But,
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  Speaker 1: you must remember, this is medicine. So you had to
• 4:32
  Speaker 1: prep for this prank a little bit. I had to, yeah.
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  Speaker 1: So I don't even know what I'm talking about. But
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  Speaker 1: this is... Medicine, this is like standing with a doctor.
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  Speaker 1: You know, the doctor, you can talk about anything. Okay?
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  Speaker 1: This is life or death. So we're going to have
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  Speaker 1: a doctor-patient level of conversation here.
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  Speaker 4: All right.
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  Speaker 1: Are you ready for this?
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  Speaker 2: Okay.
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  Speaker 1: Never. Okay, Derek Shepard, let's go. Yeah, here it is.
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  Speaker 3: Hello.
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  Speaker 1: Hello, is this Alex? Yeah. Alex Ayanbeku.
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  Speaker 3: Who is speaking?
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  Speaker 1: My name is Conrad. I'm calling you from the University
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  Speaker 1: of London. You did the V300 nurse prescribing course. Yes, yes. Okay,
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  Speaker 1: and you are aware that you did pass? Yes. Sorry,
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  Speaker 1: you sound a little bit shocked at this phone call.
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  Speaker 4: Ah, because it's your international number, so that's why I'm
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  Speaker 4: just worried with calling internationally.
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  Speaker 1: So the international standards for universities and university courses and structures,
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  Speaker 1: that's where I'm calling you from.
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  Speaker 4: Ah, okay.
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  Speaker 1: All right. We are an oversight committee that handles marking
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  Speaker 1: and checks that there's no corruption in marking and giving
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  Speaker 1: out degrees when they aren't deserved. Do you understand? Okay,
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  Speaker 1: I understand. May I call you Alex or would you prefer...
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  Speaker 1: Nurse Ayan Beku.
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  Speaker 2: Alex is fine.
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  Speaker 1: Alex, okay, Alex. So Alex, let me just explain why
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  Speaker 1: I'm calling quickly. There are concerns from the global body
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  Speaker 1: saying that this exam was way too easy. So we
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  Speaker 1: need to test you as a standardized person that took
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  Speaker 1: the test. And if you do fail the test, then
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  Speaker 1: I'm afraid the whole class is going to fail. So
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  Speaker 1: there's a lot riding on this. We're going to ask
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  Speaker 1: you three questions and you need to get three out
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  Speaker 1: of three. This will be an effective measure to see
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  Speaker 1: whether or not this test was at the global standard
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  Speaker 1: of nursing practice.
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  Speaker 4: Okay.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, so this is a multiple choice question. With drug interactions,
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  Speaker 1: patient taking warfarin asks whether they can take ibuprofen for
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  Speaker 1: back pain. What is the main concern that you would
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  Speaker 1: have as a nurse? Okay.
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  Speaker 4: Warfarin is anticoagulant and ibuprofen is antiplatelet. Both of them
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  Speaker 4: can increase the risk of bleeding.
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  Speaker 2: For the patient. Yes.
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  Speaker 4: I think I have more susceptible to bleeding. The ibuprofen
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  Speaker 4: increased the risk of gastric ulceration, testic ulceration.
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  Speaker 1: The answer I was looking for was increased risk of bleeding.
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  Speaker 1: So you were spot on there. Well done. You do
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: know your stuff. What is the difference between pharmacokinetics and pharmacodynamics?
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  Speaker 4: Kinetic is what, dynamic is what the body does to
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  Speaker 4: the drug and kinetic is what the drug does to
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  Speaker 4: the body.
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  Speaker 1: Okay, congratulations. You've got two out of two, but you
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  Speaker 1: need three out of three. So you have to get
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  Speaker 1: this next question correct for you and the whole class
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  Speaker 1: to pass the V300 exam. Okay. Final question here. A
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  Speaker 1: man's penis has turned orange.
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  Speaker 4: A man's penis has turned orange.
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  Speaker 1: Yes. How would you get to the bottom of the problem?
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  Speaker 1: What would you ask the patient?
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  Speaker 2: Okay.
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  Speaker 4: I don't know.
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  Speaker 1: Think hard. The class is going to fail because of
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  Speaker 1: you here. Please, please.
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  Speaker 4: See, I don't want the whole class to fail because
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  Speaker 4: of me.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah.
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  Speaker 1: Okay.
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  Speaker 4: Let me think deeply about it. If a patient.
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  Speaker 4: What can I suggest? I don't know what to say.
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  Speaker 1: The whole class is riding on you here, Nurse Alex.
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  Speaker 2: I can ask them if they've asked.
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  Speaker 1: Don't you remember learning this?
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  Speaker 4: Okay. As I say, if you have the... I would
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  Speaker 4: say to hit.
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  Speaker 3: Okay.
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  Speaker 1: So.
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  Speaker 4: I'm not sure. Has the patient taken it?
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  Speaker 1: I think.
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  Speaker 4: A feeling of what is most likely to be that
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  Speaker 4: the patient does. I will have to try to rule
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  Speaker 4: out any STDs going on in there. Have a proper
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  Speaker 4: wash and not getting infection in there, which can make
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  Speaker 4: it cause discoloration on it.
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  Speaker 1: Okay. Because the correct answer is you need to tell
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  Speaker 1: your patient Not to watch Pornhub and eat cheese curls
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  Speaker 1: at the same time.
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  Speaker 3: Oh.
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  Speaker 2: Not to watch porn and eat cheese curls at the
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  Speaker 2: same time.
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  Speaker 1: You got to think of the most obvious first, you know,
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  Speaker 1: before you go into the medical stuff.
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  Speaker 4: Ah.
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  Speaker 1: The whole class is going to fail because of this.
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  Speaker 1: Because it means that the questions, the standardized questioning was
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  Speaker 1: way too easy.
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  Speaker 4: Are you able to give me another question? See if
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  Speaker 4: I can go through with that. Please, please, if you
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  Speaker 4: can give me another question, let's see, because I must
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  Speaker 4: tell you the truth. I didn't just think about the
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  Speaker 4: response to that last question like that. I wasn't thinking
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  Speaker 4: that it's just going to be something as simple as
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  Speaker 4: what the patient is doing that's making the pain easier.
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  Speaker 4: go like that and I was thinking watching porn on
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  Speaker 4: a mini cheese balls will be a restaurant that you
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  Speaker 4: will be looking for you.
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  Speaker 1: See these are the critical skills of a nurse.
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  Speaker 4: I'm really sorry see if you can give me another
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  Speaker 4: question please I'm begging.
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  Speaker 1: You okay how long have you been a nurse.
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  Speaker 4: I qualified in 1999 and I've been a nurse in
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  Speaker 4: the UK since 2005.
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  Speaker 1: And where are you from originally?
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  Speaker 2: Nigeria.
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  Speaker 1: Patient walks in and his penis is blue. He says,
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  Speaker 1: I need some medication. What do you say?
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  Speaker 2: If his penis is blue, I will ask you what
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  Speaker 2: you were doing before.
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  Speaker 4: And I will ask you if you're watching anything, watching
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  Speaker 4: movies or porn when you're doing that. And if it's
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  Speaker 4: what you're eating, probably blueberry or something that can be
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  Speaker 4: of blue color that can make the discoloration come from
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  Speaker 4: your penis. And if you can confirm that, then I
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  Speaker 4: would probably say not to teach yourself if you are
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  Speaker 4: eating anything like that, but wash your hands before you
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: do things like that. And probably to not... Do you
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: know Andre Darumola?
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  Speaker 2: Yes. Where's he from?
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  Speaker 4: He's from Nigeria. I'm calling you from South Africa. Okay.
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  Speaker 1: Okay. Your Nigerian friend called me, my name is Waked Simpson,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: in South Africa on a radio station to prank you
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  Speaker 1: about your V300 nursing test.
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  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: You just kill him because I'm going to kill him.
• 13:30
  Speaker 4: I'm going to kill him.
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  Speaker 1: Okay. So you went through all of.
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  Speaker 2: What sort of prank is this?
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  Speaker 1: What?
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  Speaker 2: My hand is... My palm is sweaty. I'm just thinking,
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  Speaker 2: why would the whole class fail?
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  Speaker 1: What?
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: Nobody ever told me... What? What? I'm going to kill him.
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: You're going to hear about his death soon. I'm calling
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: him on the other phone.
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  Speaker 3: You want it?
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: We should probably hear you now. Speak.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: He will hear you. Speak.
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  Speaker 3: Just speak.
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  Speaker 2: Say something.
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  Speaker 1: Is that Andre? Andre, it's Wacky at Simpson.
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  Speaker 3: Andre, can you hear that?
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  Speaker 4: That's Wacky at Simpson.
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  Speaker 2: Oh! Oh!
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  Speaker 4: Oh!
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  Speaker 1: Oh!
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  Speaker 2: You can hear him laughing.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Can you hear him laughing?
• 14:44
  Speaker 1: I can hear him. I won't fall.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: For this again.
• 14:50
  Speaker 1: Wow.
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  Speaker 3: Too good.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: Too good.
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  Speaker 3: Did you enjoy that?
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: What did I learn?
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: I said, press pause. Doctors need to be detectives before
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: they are medical professionals. It's David Guetta with Stickman and
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: Run Run River on KFM Mornings. I can't wait to
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: hear these messages.
• 15:26
  Speaker 4: Darren, Darren, Darren, no man.
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: Even Kai having a oh, oh, oh.
• 15:33
  Speaker 4: Ah, the regulation, bro.
• 15:41
  Speaker 1: What kind of prank is that with this? I'm not
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: going to fall for this again. Oh, loveness, Alex.
• 15:52
  Speaker 4: This was excellent.
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: And Andre's laugh just tops it off. Man, this was
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: such a good prank this morning. And you know, all
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: he wanted was his mate to be on TikTok. That's
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: all he wanted. To go viral on TikTok. Well, make
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: it go viral. You know, it's crazy though. When I
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: look at these streaming numbers and you see, you actually
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: get a geolocation of where the actual code or whatever
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: is coming from. You know, every day, every day somebody
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: listens from the Vatican City. Vatican City in the middle
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  Speaker 1: of Rome. Somebody's there listening. Every day you see a
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: stream come from there. Every day. I don't know who
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: that person is. Yeah.
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: But also, some people enjoy the prank like they would
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: enjoy their favorite TV show.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: Like, every day.
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: Like, it's a comfort. You know, where some of us
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: are listening every now and then, every week, whatever. So,
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: it's every day. Like, you're watching Grey's Anatomy. I have
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: to go to bed, but first let me just see
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: Wacky's prank.
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 16:54
  Speaker 1: Now we go nighty-boo-boo. And sometimes... The frotter, the better.
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: And let me guess, those are the ones who get
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: shared as well. Yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy.